


Anxious

by JesWithOneEss



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst and Humor, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Non-Graphic Violence, Oral Sex, Sexual Content, Violence, romione
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-06
Updated: 2015-08-12
Packaged: 2017-11-11 14:38:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 192,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/479575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JesWithOneEss/pseuds/JesWithOneEss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hermione's anxiety takes a hold of her and threatens to get in the way of her slow and developing relationship with Ron. He is the only one who can pull her out of her own head long enough to finally let go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ah yes ye old disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter...at all.

It was a hot summer night at the Burrow and even with her smallest tank and shorts Hermione was still burning up. She took out her wand and cast a cooling charm over the living room. Both Hermione and Harry sighed with relief as a magical breeze blew around them.

She enjoyed the coolness for about a second then sat up to check her watch for the tenth time. She kept fidgeting her hands and glancing at the stairs, looking like she either had to pee or was waiting for the results of a final exam.

She glanced over at Harry to find him staring at her with his chin in his hand, giving her the biggest grin she'd ever seen. She rolled her eyes and fixed him with a glare. "What?"

His grin seemed to get even bigger making her wonder if his face would break in half because of it.

"Oh you know exactly 'what'", he said with a chuckle.

She didn't know what he was on about and since even her best glare never had any effect on him she decided to ignore it. She found herself once again glancing towards the stairs causing Harry to laugh out loud. She huffed at him. As comforting as it was to hear Harry taking joy in something again she didn't know if she liked being the reason for it at this moment.

She rolled her eyes again and cleared her throat. "So where is Ron anyway? Didn't he just go to get the chess game?" She averted her eyes from Harry and plucked a nonexistent hair from her shorts.

Harry laughed again. "It's only been two minutes, Hermione. What do you think's happened to him? Been eaten by the dust bunnies under his bed, did he?"

"Very funny Harry," Hermione said not amused.

Harry leaned forward in his chair until she finally gave him a 'What do you want?" look.

"Hermione, have you and Ron talked about the-"

"No!" She quickly cut him off, shaking her head furiously and looking away towards the stairs again. She knew he was going to say the word that has been running through her mind over and over since it happened more than two weeks ago. She didn't want to think about it let alone talk about, especially to Harry who was there to witness her reckless behavior.

She looked back at him and sighed. "Sorry, Harry," she said guiltily.

"It's alright, Hermione. I get it," Harry said giving her a smile to let her know there were no hard feelings. She smiled back thinking the conversation was over.

But he wouldn't give up that easily. "What I don't get is why you have been following him around for weeks now. It's like you're a lost puppy or something. Why don't you just confront him and see what happens?"

She sat up; looking at Harry shocked, processing what he just said.

She began to feel flustered and out of breath. She didn't know where this anxiety was coming from. She didn't really…follow him, right? That would be ridiculous!

"Why would you…when…no. We have all been around one another this entire time. You know that. With everything that's happened…it's only natural that we're…you know. Besides it's been weeks since...that happened. Why am I always the one to do something? It's his turn, isn't it?" she shook her head as if to further convince herself as well as Harry. "I am not going to embarrass myself again, no thank you!"

"Well," Harry started trying to find the right words after Hermione's outburst, "First of all calm down before you make the lamps levitate or something." He took a deep breath as if this was something he did not want to bring up. Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. She smelled Ginny all over this conversation.

"Look I didn't even notice it until Ginny brought it up," he said confirming her suspicions. She rolled her eyes once more.

Harry continued, "And the way you're going about it …seriously Hermione it's rather disturbing honestly. He can't even use the loo without you pacing in front of the door or go outside without you asking where he went. When he's not in the room for longer than 30 seconds you look like a bomb is about to go off. What is going on?"

"I don't know you're on about Harry," Hermione said with a nervous laugh. "But I-"

Suddenly there was a rumbling noise coming from the upper floors, becoming louder as it approached them at full speed. They both shot their heads up to see Ron bounding down the stairs, two at a time, and jumping the last stair to the landing with a loud thump, whipping the game of Wizard's Chess from behind his back with a flourish. He was out of breath and smiling at both of them.

Ron shook his red hair out of his eyes and smiled, making Hermione's heart melt. "Blimey, it's nice and cool in here! Sorry it took so long. Couldn't find the bloody thing. Finally found it in my sock drawer of all places. Can you believe it? I swear that bloody ghoul made himself at home in…my…room…" He trailed off when he noticed them both not smiling. "What's going on?" He asked looking from one to the other, confused.

Hermione sighed in relief and just stared at him, lost in thought.

_Oh no, Hermione thought, what IS going on? Do I really…follow him around like a…lost puppy? That just didn't sound like me…does it?_

"Nothing, mate" Harry said with a convincing smile. "Set it up. I'm feeling like a good beat down tonight. And by that I mean you beating me, of course," he cheeked, moving the coffee table in front of him successfully blocking Ron's view of Hermione since she was now frowning to herself, staring into space. He discreetly waved his hand in her face and whispered, "Snap. Out. Of. It."

Ron shrugged and gave a big smile. "Too right you are, mate!" After slapping Harry on the back he settled into the chair opposite them and started setting up the game.

Hermione quickly recovered and snatched up a random book and started to pretend to read. It was big enough to hide behind which suited Hermione just fine.

"Did you want to take a turn, Hermione?" Ron asked her.

She answered without removing the book from in front of her face so he wouldn't notice her red face, "Oh…no thank you. Just reading here…"

Harry then reached out and grabbed the book turning it right side up and put it back in her hands.

"Thanks, Harry," she mumbled sinking down deeper into the sofa, not daring to look at either one of them.

Ron let out a bellowing laugh, but stopped once Harry shushed him saying something about Mrs. Weasley and Ginny and sleeping...Hermione wasn't paying attention. She was busy having a very heated discussion with herself in her head.

_So Ginny says I'm following Ron around and Harry seemed worried about it. What is their problem anyway? OK so maybe I'm a little wound up, but that's to be expected after the war and losing so many people. I mean I don't see Ron having a problem with me being around. Then again it is Ron. Then there is that…kiss. Ugh the kiss. Why did I have to go and do that? He obviously thinks nothing of it. Look at him._

She risked a peek around the side of her book that she clearly wasn't reading to look at Ron. He was concentrating on the board, his eyes darting back and forth between his and Harry's chess pieces. Feeling her eyes on him he suddenly looked up catching her eye and gave her a shy smile. She smiled back with her heart racing. She hastily went back to her "reading" and closed her eyes resuming her internal dialogue.

_OK so maybe he has thought about it. He just hasn't SAID anything though, has he? No. But he seems to be in better spirits every day, still sad, but more willing to smile and laugh and I can't help but feel responsible for that… Yes that's it_ , Hermione thought _. We all needed each other and we still do. If Harry and Ginny think I'm being overly cautious then so be it. I'm just being a good friend. Even if that's all I'll ever be I'll take it. I can handle that…right?_

She was so tired, but she was determined to stay awake until either Ron or Harry decided to go to sleep. She didn't know how long she sat there with her eyes closed, lost in thought.

Hermione was suddenly thrown out of her sleepy trance when Ron suddenly plopped down on the sofa next to her. "Bloody hell I'm knackered. Good game Harry," Ron said with a smirk, and then reached in front of Hermione's head to punch Harry in the arm. Harry then reached over and flicked Ron's ear, both of them laughing. Hermione however was fuming.

_Sometimes it was a pain the arse having two boys as your best mates, she thought._

She turned to Ron and glared at him. "Do you mind? I mean really, do you have to act like children all the time?"

She heard Harry chuckle and didn't bother looking over at him knowing he would be shaking his head as he always does when they bicker.

Ron looked back at her smiling sheepishly and shrugged his shoulders.

"Sorry?" he said, not looking the least bit apologetic. She knew him well enough by now to know when he was egging her on for a row.

She didn't trust herself to speak when Ron looked at her like that so she just rolled her eyes and closed her book. She was never going to be able to actually read tonight whether she wanted to or not.

"So what were you reading anyway?" Ron asked as if nothing happened. That was another thing that annoyed Hermione about him as well as loved him for it. She was glad for a change of subject.

"Um…" she said realizing she never read the title after picking it up in the first place. She turned it over and cringed. "How to Cure Spattergroit in Hard to Reach Places…"

She said it so fast and low she knew no one heard it and hoped they would just leave it alone. Unfortunately Ron caught on and snatched the book out of her hand laughing. He immediately went silent after reading it out loud and just as immediately reached over and placed it on the bookshelf next to him, as far as he could reach. When he looked over at Hermione again he was peering at her as if trying to solve some kind of riddle.

"Well it's not mine!" Hermione said indignantly and sat back with her arms crossed. Ron, trying to hold back his laugh, cleared his throat and resumed his position next to her, both staring ahead. There was another quiet chuckle from Harry. Hermione finally looked at him and gave him a look that told him to 'shut it or else'. He put his hands up and looked the other way still smiling.

She was still tired, but no one seemed to want to move on up to bed so she slid down the sofa until her legs stretched out across the top of the coffee table, feet crossed. She was careful not to touch Ron in any way. It wasn't because she didn't want to. It was quite the opposite, in fact. She was scared that any contact with him would cause her to embarrass herself yet again.

She peeked at Ron and caught him staring at her legs.

Hmm…interesting, she thought to herself. But the longer he looked the more she felt herself blush and the more self conscious she became.

She cleared her throat loudly, "Ahem!" He looked up at her with a grin and then sat back with his eyes closed and arms crossed, relaxed.

_How does he do that? Be so calm while I'm sitting here on the verge of a nervous breakdown? Is he intentionally trying to drive me mad?_

She took a deep breath. Her eyes traveled slowly down his body to his right foot which was crossed over his left knee, dangling dangerously close to her own knee. He was swinging it by the ankle and she was mesmerized by it. It was the only indication that he was still awake and she just couldn't look away.

She was startled when she suddenly felt someone poke her side. She turned her head and saw Harry walking backwards toward the stairs waving his fingers at her and wiggling his eyebrows. She felt a rush of panic realizing this meant she was being left alone with Ron, next to her, on the sofa! She shook her head at Harry frantically waving him back with both hands, silently pleading with him to sit back down. He put a finger to his lips and simply turned and tiptoed quietly up the stairs.

She didn't know what to do. She couldn't remember the last time she was alone with him. She looked around her searching for some inspiration and instead found more anxiety.

_What is going on with me_ , she wondered _. It's only Ron for goodness' sake! I can't let one…kiss make me crazy and forget about years of friendship. He's obviously comfortable with this arrangement so I should be too…right? I'll just go upstairs to bed first…_

But then that would mean leaving him down here by himself and for some reason that idea made her even more anxious. After a few more minutes of contemplation she looked over at Ron again, his eyes were closed and his mouth slightly open. Then she looked down at his foot that was no longer swinging.

_Oh god,_ she thought _. Now what? I should just wake him up and tell him we should both go up to bed. Separately, of course…But he looks so peaceful and... I'll just sit here a little longer and wake him up in a little while. He won't know when Harry left and since he's sleeping I don't have to worry about any more embarrassing conversations._

Feeling good with her decision she settled back against the sofa and tucked her feet under her, facing Ron. She rested her head on her hand and took a nice long look at his face. Her eyes traced over every freckle and eyelash, something she has never been able to do before and something she intended to take full advantage of now that he was sleeping no more than a foot away.

Her eyes moved to the tip of his long nose making her think about his smell. She closed her eyes and leaned forward slightly to take a deep breath near his shoulder and smiled. She loved his smell, somewhere between chocolate and soap. She opened her eyes and looked up at his face again and found herself inches away from his lips. His full, soft lips were just there, right in front of her. His mouth was open a bit and she can feel his steady breath blow on her cheek, that's how close she was. She closed her eyes and took a deep quivering breath. She let it out as slowly as she can as to not wake him.

_Oh merlin,_ she thought _. This is it for me. I love him. So much. I'm in love with him and I have no idea how to get out of it._

With that last thought drowsiness took over and her head dropped lower against her will. Then everything went dark.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Harry Potter…of course.

Hermione's eyes snapped open and she instantly felt like something was not right. It was pitch dark and her body felt like a pretzel.

_Alright Hermione, think! What is the last thing you remember? Chess game…book…Harry leaving…and RON! I was watching Ron sleep and must have fallen asleep myself..._

As her eyes became more accustomed to the lack of light she could just make out the throw that Mrs. Weasley knitted thrown carelessly over an arm chair in the corner of the room. Hermione realized right away that she was in the living room at the Burrow. That much had not changed. Her body was in much the same position as she remembered, on her side with her feet still tucked under her. Her right arm was now trapped between Ron's back and the sofa while her other arm was resting on his chest in front of her face. She glanced up at him; his head was back and tilted to the side, propped up on his right hand, his mouth open and lightly snoring. She smiled. His left arm was wrapped around her lower back, his hand resting at her heels on the seat cushion. A shiver ran down her spine.

She listened and could hear Ron's heartbeat under her ear. The sound was hypnotic. She listened intently as each thump put new life into her. She closed her eyes allowing herself a moment to get caught up in the rhythm of his heart and the rise and fall of his upper body. The combination of his steady breathing and constant heartbeat meant he was still alive and that understanding made her relax and feel safe, if only for a little while. As if it were her own lifeline she concentrated on the pace of his heart. She counted the seconds between each beat and timed her own breathing to match his.

She knew she should move, wake him up…do something. For the second time in one night she found herself in a split decision on whether or not to risk everything just to remain in close proximity to him. A part of her felt foolish for sitting there fully awake, pretending to be asleep. If he were to wake up and find her there on top of him she was ready to react accordingly, surprised and full of embarrassment and apologies. The other, more irrational and desperate, part of her felt like if she were to let go she just might disappear. That part of her knew that if she didn't have proof that he was still breathing she just might lose it completely. That part is what convinced her to remain exactly where she was.

_I can't let him leave again. It's entirely my fault that I let him go the first time. I should have stunned him as soon as I saw him grab his rucksack, when he ripped off the locket, when he went to leave the tent, before he disapparated. There were so many chances and all I did was scream his name. I'm always screaming at him. No wonder he left…_

She started thinking about everything they have been through this past year. On the run, losing him when he left, getting him back and almost losing him again many times during the battle. Then there was Fred and knowing what Ron has been going through, dealing with such a tremendous loss.

They all lost so much. People they loved who they will never see again. And here Hermione was lying on top of Ron, gripping him like she never intended to ever let go.

It was too much for her. She was feeling so many emotions and holding him like this was sending her nerves sky high. She began to tremble and shake and found it hard to take in a breath. She grabbed hold of the back of his shirt in her fist and gasped into his chest. Her throat started to feel tighter which meant less air going into her lungs. She knew if she didn't calm down she would pass out, but started to panic when she found she couldn't control it. All of a sudden she was wrenched away from Ron and felt his strong hands on her shoulders. She looked up at him taking shorter and shorter breaths.

She tried to speak, "Ro- I- can't….brea..." Her eyes darted around in the still dark room searching for something…oxygen maybe? She didn't know what she was looking for, but she knew for the first time in her life she didn't have an answer. That realization made her heart beat even faster.

Ron's eyes were big as she ever saw them, instantly awake and full of worry.

"Hermione!...Hermione!" Ron whispered loudly, trying hard not to wake anyone. "Oh my…here." In one swift movement he grabbed her by the waist and pushed her feet to the floor, thrusting her head between her legs.

 _What is he doing!_  Hermione's head was spinning and black dots starting to pop in front of her eyes.

Ron scrambled to the floor and kneeled in front of her. She felt both of his hands rub firmly up and down her back forcing her upper body to stay arched. He leaned over and bent his head close to hers.

"Shhh…it's alright. Relax Hermione. Calm down. Breathe." He kept repeating those lines over and over into her ear. She strained to focus on his voice which seemed to affect her just as his heartbeat did. She finally went limp and was able to take in deeper breaths. The black dots slowly faded away and her heart stopped wanting to escape her chest.

Ron dropped his hands down to his sides and sat back on his heels. She could feel him staring at her, apprehension and fear coming off him in waves. She knew she must look something frightful; her hair frizzed out, her face pale and tears streaked down her cheeks. She ran her fingers through her hair and down her face in an attempt to wipe off any lingering anxiety. Hermione took one last deep breath and finally sat up to face him. That's when she felt a whole new set of emotions come over her. This time she could pinpoint exactly what it was. Mortification. Pure and simple humiliation.

She abruptly shook her head trying to grab a hold of herself before she lost it again. She did not want Ron to see her like this and start to pity her. She needed to figure this out and fix it. Immediately.

_Whatever this is I don't want him to look at me like that. Ever again. I don't need pity. I just need him. Safe and here and normal. That's all I want._

Hermione forced a smile on her face that she knew must have looked more like a grimace.

"It was only a nightmare," she said shakily. She cleared her throat and tried again, "It happens sometimes. Not as bad as this time of course, but that must have been from waking up in the dark…and not in my bed...or something." She chuckled uneasily.

Even in the dark she could see his blond lashes low over his eyes in a deep frown. His lips were in a thin line, the fullness of them trapped inside his mouth. He leaned forward and brushed her hair from both sides of her face and wiped some forgotten tears from beneath her eyes with his thumbs. She gasped at his touch and he quickly withdrew, looking wounded and even more confused. Knowing she was the one who caused him to back away made her extremely nervous.

Before she can say anything to convince him she was alright Ron leaned forward again, this time to get up and sit next to her on the sofa. She turned her body to look at him, determined to show a more controlled and non-repellant expression. To her immense relief he no longer looked as shocked and fearful as he did earlier, although the concern was still obviously there. He looked down at his hands and spoke so quietly Hermione had to lean forward slightly just to hear him clearly.

"I- I think I know what's going on Hermione. I didn't want to say anything because bringing it up would mean actually talking about it and you know how rubbish I am when it comes to that sort of thing."

She moved to protest, but he stopped her with a pleading look. She shut her mouth and let him talk.

"I have nightmares sometimes. Horrible ones. Not just of Fred dying, but of everyone dead. Mum, Harry…you. It's scary. Then I wake up and it felt so real it's hard to shake, you know?" he shuddered as if reliving his last nightmare right in front of him.

Hermione visibly sighed with relief. He believed she had a nightmare. He hadn't noticed how desperate she's been to be around him or clinging to him while he slept. She didn't remember dreaming anything and felt like a wretch for lying, but hearing him opening up to her like this took some of the guilt away.

"You didn't have one tonight, did you?" Hermione asked softly.

Ron looked at her puzzled. Then his face softened and he took one her hands in his, rubbing the top with his thumb.

"Yea…you're right." He grinned at her and said, "I reckon you had something to do with that."

"Oh well…I don't know," Hermione said, blushing. "I'm sorry you're having a hard time of it. I guess there is no perfect way to go through all of this is there? We all need to get relief and help where we can find it."

"Yea…but are you alright now? Do you feel better?"

She smiled, pleased that she didn't completely scare him off from touching her again. She no longer felt apprehensive and a genuine smile spread across her face.

 _This is brilliant_ , Hermione thought.

"Yes, of course. It was scary, but it passed. I should be fine," she said. When he grabbed her other hand and clasped them both tight she whispered, "I'll be just…fine."

She looked into his eyes and saw something close to what looked like surprise then determination.

"Come 'ere," Ron muttered.

Her eyes were still locked on his as he tugged her hands slightly, bringing her in for a hug. Once again she found herself with her head against his chest, his heart still beating, this time at a more rapid pace than when he was sleeping. This time his arms were wrapped around her back and he squeezed, crushing her to him. She hauled herself up further until her face was in his neck and her arms were wrapped around neck. She shamelessly curled up to his side trying to get as close as she could get without outright sitting his lap.

_I know we still have to talk about that…kiss, but this is so much better than talking. I'm tired of talking. I talk too much._

Then both his hands, palms flat against her back, started moving up then down again. With every stroke of his hands her body seemed to take over. They would slowly go up her back, almost to her shoulder blades and she would suck in a breath. Down his hands would go even more slowly down to the top of her shorts and she would let out a shaky breath and dig her head deeper into his neck.

"Is this alright?" she heard Ron say clearly above her, his lips next to her ear, his hands stopping somewhere in the middle of her back. She didn't dare speak or open her eyes to look at him. She just nodded her head and snuggled in deeper. After so many weeks of awkward glances and shy smiles and general anxiety she was finally where she wanted to be. To be so close to him and have him willingly hold her was more than she could ask for.

Hermione felt him take a deep breath causing her to rise with him and fall when he let it out slow, blowing her hair around her ear, tickling her. She chuckled softly and closed her eyes, feeling totally satisfied, not caring how transparent she had become.

"Thank you for kissing me." He said it so abruptly it almost seemed to tumble out of his mouth without his brain's consent. "Damn. Sorry. Didn't mean to come out like that."

Hermione swiftly brought her head up to meet his and couldn't help but smile broadly. He finally said something! She was stunned and elated to finally have it out in the open. Then she thought about what he just said.

"Um…your welcome?" She smiled at him bemused. Who thanks someone for a kiss anyway?

"And…thank you for…kissing me back," she said looking at him expectantly. He was looking at her with such adoration it actually almost took her breath away…again. She stared into his eyes and felt trapped in them. She never wanted to look away as long as he kept staring at her like that.

_I'm sure I can think of a spell or charm that would allow us to function everyday and go about our business with our eyes linked together. I mean how hard can it be really?_

She was starting to imagine of the best way to go about devising that type of magic. She was contemplating the logistics of a sticking charm and thinking of ways to rework it when all of a sudden his face seemed to grow larger in front of her. She realized in the next second that his face was actually getting closer, not bigger and just as suddenly his mouth was on hers.

"Oomph!" she let out an involuntary sound when she found herself flat on her back with Ron on top of her, his mouth hard against hers, pressing her head into the sofa cushions, his hands still on her back.

 _Oh my god he's going to suffocate me!_  She thought to herself.

She could not have imagined that this was how their second kiss would go. As much as she wanted to kiss him back she was finding it rather difficult as there was no room to breathe let alone move her lips. She can sense his nervousness and didn't want to embarrass him, but after a few more seconds she couldn't take it any longer. She grabbed his shoulders and pushed as hard as she could. He instantly jumped back to the other end of the sofa and stared at her wide eyed, breathing heavy, his lips red and his brow sweaty.

"Bloody hell, Hermione! I'm so sorry! I don't know why I just did that. You just looked so happy and beautiful and your face was so close," he ran his hands up and down his face as if trying to wake up. "Are you alright? Oh shit that was a bloody awful kiss, wasn't it? Fuck! I always have to screw things up…"

Hermione just looked up at him from her position still on the sofa, trying to catch her breath.

"You think I'm…beautiful?"

"What? Of course! Why the hell wouldn't I?" he exclaimed.

As impetuous as Ron was at explaining himself she knew him and knew that he meant it. She can tell when he was saying the truth. He would swear and get a wild look in his eye if anyone questioned his honesty. She hated his use of profanities, but it was just one of many things about him that his passion. That same passion is what made her fall in love with him.

"It wasn't that awful.' She said quietly trying to make him feel better.

"No it was, Hermione. It was a sad excuse for a kiss and I do not want you thinking I kiss that way. Ever." He looked down at her and said, "Can we have a do-over? I promise not to attack you...again"

He grinned and held out his hand to her. She grinned back and grabbed his hand. She didn't let him pull her up, however. She yanked him down so he landed on top of her, his head above hers, causing her nose to bump into his shoulder. "Sorry," she mumbled into his armpit.

"S'alright," Ron said in a low voice. He pinned her hand above her head and gradually slid down the length of her body until he was level with her face. This made his shirt go up and the top of her tank top go down. She could feel the air of the cooling charm she cast earlier in the night still coursing around them, but that hardly made a difference in the heat they were creating. She couldn't believe after that bold and somewhat ill planned kiss that Ron could be so careful and…well sexy.

 _Does he realize the effect he has on me?_ Hermione wondered. _Is this even happening right now? Forget about being glued together with our eyes. THIS is how I want to stay forever._ She forced herself to come back to the present. She wanted to feel every part of him that was touching her and burn it into her memory.

As he slowly moved in to kiss her she took note of his hands that were buried in her hair next to her ears, his body hovering so that his lower half wasn't touching her.

She grabbed the back of his neck with both hands and pulled his head down to hers. The kiss was a complete 180 degrees from the last one and for that Hermione was grateful. It was firm, but soft. When Ron pulled away she only had a second before he came back again, making the kisses longer each time. After a while she felt his hands travel from her hair down to her shoulders then to her waist where he wrapped his arms around her, squeezing and fitting their upper bodies together. He traced his tongue against her lips and she let his tongue wrap around hers. She never kissed anyone like this before. That thought made her stomach tie in knots. The heat between their bodies was starting to make her sweat in areas she didn't know could perspire.

He pulled away from her lips to plant wet, tender kisses all over her neck, under her chin, behind her ears. Hermione's senses were beyond control. Her hands were in his hair grabbing handfuls of it and pulling, roaming all over his back clutching the faded and worn fabric of his shirt.

"Hermione you're brilliant," Ron murmured into her mouth before kissing her again with more passion than before. As he deepened the kiss she felt his hands on her hips. He gave them a rough squeeze then made his way up under her shirt to massage her stomach.

"Oh my god, Ron…" she bunched up his shirt with her hands in an attempt to control herself. His kisses became faster and hungrier. She gasped loudly when he suddenly slid his hands down her legs pulling them out to the sides so he was now laying flat between her legs. Both hands now skimmed up her thighs and grabbed her bottom through her shorts.

"Oh!" Hermione yelled out. She wanted him more than anything and having his hands all over her was more than intoxicating. However, the first part of her, the more rational and level headed part, came rushing in at full speed and took over her completely. This was too much and she had to stop it before it went any further. One more minute of this and she knew she would ban that part of her brain forever. As tempting as that thought was she needed her entire brain intact.

"Ron!" she said trying to push him off her.

"Yes Hermione…so fucking brilliant," Ron replied obviously taking her exclamation as a sign of desire and started kissing her again in earnest.

She pulled away and finally got out, "No Ron. We have to stop."

Ron pulled his hands out from underneath her bum so quick she bounced back on the cushions.

"Oh shit. Did I do it again? I'm-"

Hermione shot up face him and took his hands in hers.

"Before you say anything do not even think about apologizing to me," Hermione interrupted. If he even hinted that he was sorry about what just happened she knew she would never be able to survive it.

He seemed to understand what she meant and she was grateful when his face broke into a huge grin. "Alright, I won't even think about it. I promise. But can I say that that was bloody brilliant? Because it was," Ron said with a squeeze of her hands.

Hermione rolled her eyes at him, suddenly shy and smiled. He reached down for another kiss before standing up. He then lifted her off the sofa so she was standing in front of him. She didn't know what to say now. Everything that just happened flashed before her eyes and although Ron had a goofy grin on his face she still worried that maybe they went too far, too fast.

He must have noticed her trademark worried expression because he pulled her into a tight hug and said, "It was brilliant, but not just because I'm a randy git…I- I'm also so in love with you I can't stand it."

He held his breath and stared down at her waiting. She was speechless.

_He just told me he loved me! This is really happening with us. I'm not just dreaming or hopelessly wishing. He said those words and he was so sweet. How can I not love this boy? How did it take this long for us to get here?_

She looked dead in his eyes and grabbed his face, smashing his cheeks together making him look like a fish. He let out his breath and they both laughed when she kissed his pursed lips with a smack.

"I love you so much, Ron. For so long, you have no idea," Hermione said breathlessly through a laugh. He let out a laugh again, grabbing her around the waist and swinging her around making her shriek.

All of a sudden they heard a noise from above them like someone closing a door and froze looking toward the stairs praying no one was coming down. No one did.

"Must've been someone using the loo," Ron muttered setting her down. "We should probably get upstairs to bed before it turns morning."

"Oh no! I hope no one heard us," Hermione whispered, her face turning red.

"Naw. If they did they would have said something to take the mickey or stop us. Don't worry, its fine," Ron whispered back, prodding her toward to stairs.

"Right. Let's go, quietly," Hermione whispered tiptoeing up the stairs with Ron behind her. They passed by the loo, but it was empty. Whoever it was must have already went back to their room. They both sighed with relief.

Hermione stopped in front of Ginny's door. "Good night Ron," she said as quietly as she could.

He reached out and grabbed her hand, squeezing it once more and letting go, "'Nite Hermione," he whispered and made his way up to the next floor to his room.

Hermione opened the bedroom door and cringed when it creaked.

"Where the bloody hell were YOU?"

Hermione closed the door and spun around to see Ginny sitting up in her bed. The moonlight from the window throwing a halo of light behind her mass of tangled red hair that was piled high on top of her head. She was looking at Hermione with an expression of total mirth and disbelief. She shook her head, sniggering quietly which caused her hair to flop over onto her forehead. She impatiently shoved it back to its sloppy position and fixed Hermione with a look.

"Well? Did my brother give you a good go or is he as rubbish at it as he is at…well everything really?"

Hermione was amazed at how good Ginny always was at keeping a straight face when she said things like this.

"What are you…how…I don't know what you're insinuating about anything, Ginny," Hermione stammered feeling her cheeks burn. She quickly made her way to her own bed, praying for her to go back to sleep. She knew she was going to lose this one already. This was Ginny she was dealing with.

"Well be glad it was just me who woke up to use the loo and heard you both carrying on like dragons in heat down there. It was quite disgusting really," Ginny said with a snort and a laugh.

Hermione stopped I her tracks and sat on Ginny's bed instead of her own. She grabbed her shoulders, causing Ginny to bite back her laugh in alarm.

"Listen," Hermione said, "it's not what you think. We were clothed and nothing like… _that_  happened, alright?"

She let go of her and settled back, crossing her legs. For some reason she was wide awake and wanted to talk to her only girl friend. Being Ron's sister was a dodgy bullet, but she figured Ginny would handle it.

"I fell asleep with him on the sofa." Ginny groaned, rolling her eyes.

"No, wait! I have to say this please. It's eating me up and I want to talk about it, please," Hermione begged then rolled her own eyes when Ginny scoffed and make a rude noise at the word eat.

"Really, Ginny? You know that's not what I meant."

"Ok," Ginny said, sobering up. She cleared her throat, "Continue. Please. I would love to hear how Ron, fully clothed, managed to make you squeal like a pig. By all means go on."

Hermione chose to ignore her sarcasm. She's used to it by now.

"Anyway, so yes we wore  _clothes_  the whole time, but I'll spare you the details, alright? So we…kissed…a lot and then he told me he loved me. He said it!" Hermione felt like such a girl, but she didn't care. Even when Ginny looked at her like she grew two heads she was still flying high.

"I don't know why you're so happy about that over grown prat loving you, but to each their own I suppose," Ginny quipped, shrugging her shoulders. Hermione's mood, however, was too contagious and Ginny was then smiling from ear to ear.

"Really Hermione, I'm happy for you both. It's about bloody time you both got your heads out your arses and did something. I'm just sorry I had to be a witness, that's all," she laughed and hugged her friend.

Hermione hugged her back and bounced off Ginny's bed and into her own, gazing up at the ceiling.

"Thank you Ginny. And please don't tell anyone what you heard…Not even Harry!"

She heard Ginny sigh in exasperation and flop back down on her bed. "Fine, but next time do a muffliato or silencing charm…or go to the shed. Deal?"

Hermione chuckled and smiled to herself thinking of the next time she might be alone with Ron.

"Deal. Good Night Ginny."

"Good night, Hermione."

She heard Ginny turn over and mutter something about pigs and clothing, but Hermione was too busy thinking about Ron. He was just a floor away and she felt like there were miles between them. After everything they shared that night she knew she had him. She loved him so much and now she knew he loved her just as much.

This new development, however, did nothing to squelch the worry and anxiety she had about not being around him or not knowing where he was. Now that she had even more to lose she felt even more anxious.

She became aware of herself starting to take shallow breaths and silently summoned Ron's voice from earlier telling her it was alright and to breathe. This was enough for her to finally calm down and after a few minutes she closed her eye, falling asleep with a smile.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to explore Ron's side of things so this chapter is totally from his POV. It was too much fun writing him and I hope it's just as much fun to read.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any other characters within his world.

Ron soared through the air on his broomstick flying as fast as he could. He braced himself and narrowed his eyes, not only because of the wind, but from pure determination. He chanced a look behind him for a quick second to make sure he had a good lead on the person who was after him. He grunted out of frustration when he saw that they were right on his tail. He bent even lower onto his broom, his chin almost touching the handle.

"Come on you lousy git of a broom. Just a bit more…"Ron muttered to his pathetic and old Cleansweep.

 _I swear to merlin the first chance I get I'm getting me a new broom_ , Ron thought to himself _, and using this one for kindling._

The very top roof of the Burrow barreled closer to him and he sped toward it with all the will power he could muster. If he could just get there before they did…

He knew he was getting close when he heard the moaning and clanking of the attic ghoul become louder.

He glanced over his left shoulder and found no one behind him. Confused, he whipped his head around to his right just in time to get a face full of long red hair.

"What the fuck!" he screamed, pulling strands out of his mouth.

"Shit," he said to himself as the person he was trying so desperately to beat raced past him and landed gracefully on the roof in front of him. He skidded to a stop on the tattered shingles, his feet ripping through shards of wood. His face was red, splotchy and drenched in sweat. He jumped off his broom and rounded on Ginny.

"Oi, cheater!"

Ginny simply smirked at him and propped up her broom in one hand, twirling a strand of her long red hair with the other. Ron glared at her hair remembering it smacking him in the face just moments ago. He got an overwhelming urge to use a severing charm on those vicious locks.

She flashed Ron a toothy smile and said, "What's the matter, Ron? Mad you lost to a  _girl_?" She said 'girl' in that sing song voice she knew he hated.

"No, of course not," he said, rolling his eyes. After years of living with the girl he knew when Ginny was trying to goad him into a fight. Her teasing used to prod his temper, but now he just felt a hint of pride towards his little sister. They shared similar personalities and he was starting to appreciate it more and more.

"You used your hair as a weapon, Ginny. That was not part of the rules, you know," he said with a smirk.

"I don't remember there being any rules, honestly. All I remember is you saying, and I quote," she put on a cocky grin to imitate Ron, "It doesn't matter which broom you use. It's all about the power of the flyer."

She struck an absurd macho pose and pounded her chest. She burst out laughing. Ron was not as amused.

"I do NOT talk like that." he said trying not to laugh.

"Oh calm down Ron I was only taking the piss," she said plopping down on the slanted roof.

"Haha, Ginny," he said sitting next to her.

They both looked out over the view of the front of the Burrow. A dairy farm was straight ahead, so tiny it was more like a speck, with open fields all around it. He could just make out the red barn and silo from where he sat on the sloped rooftop. Out of habit he reached out his thumb and finger and squashed the little barn. Ginny squinted her eyes and copied Ron's movement, pinching her fingers together and making a crunching noise. They both laughed at their old game.

Ron remembered coming up here with Ginny when they were younger, before he left to Hogwarts. Knowing they weren't allowed up there added to the fun. Sometimes they would play wizards chess and other times they would take something from their father's workshop and make up stories about how they thought muggles used them. Ginny was always best at the stories. His favorite one was when they stole a curling iron and Ginny told a story of a man who got tired of flat feet and decided to invent a tool to curl his toes so he could buy smaller, cheaper shoes. They knew what most of the real uses were by now, but he often wondered if he could use something like that to make his huge feet a size smaller.

"So how are things with Hermione?" Ginny asked, pulling Ron back into conversation. "Not that I really have to ask since you two are never more than two inches from each other. I'm surprised you survived this long without her."

He stuck his tongue out at her, but instantly found himself grinning like an idiot.

"Yea well I couldn't pass up an opportunity to race you, could I? Even if I did lose…unfairly, mind you," he cheeked.

"Yea yea, so you say,' Ginny laughed. "But really how is Hermione? I mean you both seem happy."

Ron thought back to that night on the sofa when they shared their second kiss, a month ago now. Ever since that night they have been inseparable. Although they haven't gone further physically than they did that night he was perfectly fine with how they were. For so many years he had gone back and forth between pretending she didn't exist to outright wanting her attention. He used to fight with her for that attention, thinking that was the only way to get it. He thought he would miss the bickering and fighting they had going between them in the past. He used to love getting her riled up and flustered while she screamed at him. However, even though he no longer had to try that hard to get her attention she still got flustered and riled up, but for all the right reasons. Now she was giving him all the attention in the world. Hermione has been very affectionate towards him and he loved every minute of it. His smile got bigger when he got to thinking about kissing her lips, her hands, her face, her soft-

"Oi! Earth to Ron!" Ginny snapped her fingers in front of his face and he felt his face grow hot. He shook himself as if he just woke up.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly. "Can't help it, Ginny. She makes me mental, that one. I'm a lucky bloke."

Ginny looked straight ahead and sighed, "Yea I know what you mean. Harry is amazing." She looked back to Ron and said sincerely, "I love him so much, Ron. I really do"

Ron reached over and tugged on her hair, no longer wanting to shear it off, and smiled. "I know you do. As weird as it was for me in the beginning I know he loves you, too. We're both lucky, yeah?"

"Definitely," she said with a big smile.

"Ron! Where are you?" He heard Hermione's voice call out from the ground below. He detected a note of alarm in her voice and shot up to his feet. He peered over the edge of the roof and saw her right below them shielding her eyes from the sun, searching the sky. He sighed with relief when he saw there was nothing clearly wrong going on down there. He took a second to study her from his vantage point. Her long curly hair was pulled back into a ponytail that reached down to her bum as her head was tilted all the way back. His eyes traveled down her exposed neck to her sleeveless striped top. He could just make out the line of her cleavage where her breasts were pushed together from her arms reaching up to her face. She was wearing cropped jeans and flip flops. His breath caught in his throat as he watched her face creased with worry.

_Sweet merlin, she's so bloody gorgeous._

"Looks like you outlasted her then," Ginny said from behind him, chuckling. He looked back and saw Ginny mount her broom. He shrugged his shoulders as if to say 'oh well, what are you gonna do?'

Ginny flew down to meet Hermione on the grass. He saw Hermione ask her something and Ginny pointed up to roof in Ron's direction.

"Sorry, Hermione," Ginny said loud enough for Ron to hear. "I had to comfort him after I royally beat him in our race. He was quite distraught." At that she sauntered off waving up at Ron with a happy grin on her face.

 _That bint_ , Ron thought to himself as he flipped her off. Ginny returned the favor while sticking out her tongue. Then she made her way inside to find Harry.

Ron laughed out loud and looked back at Hermione to find her peering up at him from under her hand with a frown on her face, tapping her foot. His smile wavered when he saw her foot tapping. That was never a good sign. He rarely saw it anymore, but when she did do it he knew she was serious. He quickly climbed onto his broom and raced down to land beside her.

"Hello, beautiful," he said with a grin, hoping that whatever upset her will be wiped away with a simple expression. She blew out a frustrated breath, but he saw something warm flicker in her eyes. He knew he was on the right track. He decided to chance it and leaned down for a kiss when he was met with her hands on his chest pushing him back.

"Why may I ask were you sitting on the roof?" she said pointing a finger into his shoulder. "Do you have any idea how high that is? It's slanted, Ron! You could have…rolled off or something!" She was fuming at him, her face was red and her lips were thinned out.

 _Bloody hell it's been a while since I saw her this bothered,_ Ron thought _. If she didn't look so worried I would start a fight just to see her get all hot and bothered, for old times' sake._

"Hermione, it's not a big deal," he said grabbing her hands. He was relieved when she didn't pull them away. "Ginny and I used to hang out up there a lot as kids. We were racing our brooms and that was the end line. It's not as bad as it looks from down here."

He felt her relax her shoulders and moved his hands up her arms, pulling her closer to him. He could smell traces of garlic and rosemary on her clothes. She must have been helping his mum cook dinner. Imagining Hermione in the kitchen with food made his heart race and stomach grumble.

She lifted her arms to circle his neck and he let out a sigh of contentment. She looked in his eyes and gave him a small smile. His heart melted just then and he wrapped his arms fully around her waist.

_Do I know this woman or what? I'm a bloody genius is what I am._

"I just don't like it when I don't know where you are," she said quietly, running her hands through the short hair on the back of his head. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers.

"I miss you quite terribly, you know," she said, their lips almost touching. A tremor went through his body and he gripped her tighter.

"I always miss you, Hermione. There's nowhere else I want to be than here in your arms," he whispered.

She moaned softly and he felt her press against his body tightly and tug on his hair. He gasped and closed the space between their lips with a crushing kiss. His hands explored her back and sides He could never get enough of her curves. The kiss deepened as her hands went to his shoulders and squeezed. He never felt so loved and wanted than when he was with her like this. She poured all of her love into him with her kisses and he found out very early on that he was addicted to them and to her.

He was just about to slip his hand under the back of her shirt when he heard someone clear their throat from behind them.

_Oh shit! Are we still outside? What time is it?_

He opened his eyes wide and tried to pull away, but Hermione was having none of it. She obviously heard nothing because she was then kissing him with renewed fervor, biting his lower lip and sucking on his tongue. He was starting to panic as he had no idea who was watching this. When her hands reached down and grabbed his bum he yelped and jumped back from her. He heard a snigger from behind them. She wobbled and he steadied her with his hands before spinning around to face either embarrassment, torture or a telling off.

"Ron, what are you-" Hermione started, soundly extremely put out. Ron felt her go stiff next to him when she finally noticed there was someone else outside with them.

Ron just rolled his eyes and smacked his teeth, irritated at being interrupted.

"It's fine, Hermione. It's only Harry. What do you want, mate?" Ron asked, using a tone that clearly told Harry to bugger off.

Harry, on the other hand, had a very offended look on his face.

"Only Harry, my arse! _"_ Harry exclaimed. "I came out to get you both for dinner. I figured you would be…occupied, but I thought I would have more of a warning, yeah?" Harry shook his head and couldn't help smirking at them.

Hermione had recovered from her moment of humiliation and stuck her nose in the air. Ron looked down at her and could see traces of discomfort still apparent on her flushed cheeks and red ears.

"You said dinner was ready, Harry?" she said in what Ron knew was her most superior voice. He grinned over at Harry knowing what was likely going to come next.

Before Harry could answer she said, "Then I suggest you stop gawking at us so we can go inside and eat… _yeah_?" She ended on a sarcastic note.

 _And there it is_ , Ron thought with satisfaction _. I must be rubbing off on her. Good god I love this girl._

Ron snorted out loud at Harry's stunned expression. Hermione grabbed Ron's hand and practically dragged him to the door, passing Harry without a second look.

"Sorry, mate, but you asked for that one," Ron said, still laughing.

Before they went inside Ron could hear harry mumbling behind them.

"Gawking…ha…losing my appetite, more like…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I wanted to make this chapter on the lighter side as it is from Ron's point of view. As far as he sees it everything with Hermione is great so he doesn't notice any red flags…yet. There will be more to come, both happy and dark in this story. Thanks for reading! The next chapter hopefully won't take as long to update as this one did.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my longest chapter yet. I have some of everything in here. Humor, Angst and a Lemon towards the end. You have been warned!
> 
> I want to give thanks to my friend, Liz, who is an even bigger HP nut than I am and was the inspiration for this chapter. Also to my wonderful proofreader, Arlene, who highlighted all over this story. Yellow has always been her favorite color.
> 
> Disclaimer: Harry Potter and friends are not mine. If only…

As they sat down for dinner Ron looked around and the familiar pangs of grief fell over him whenever he saw how few people were in attendance. Sure Harry, Ginny and Hermione were a constant fixture at the Burrow these days, but he missed having a full table of loud gingers, happy and hungry, all of them stuffing their faces with his mum's excellent cooking. It was only until a few weeks ago that his mother was able to get out of bed and only days ago that she was in the mood to put out a whole meal. Up until then they all pitched in to help with meals and cleaning. Hermione still helped in the kitchen mainly because she knew Mrs. Weasley still needed the company. It warmed Ron's heart thinking about how kind and patient Hermione has been with his family, particularly during such a difficult time.

Ron's older siblings had stuck around for the first few weeks after the war. However, with them having jobs and families, they dispersed to continue on with their lives. Mr. Weasley was constantly at the ministry helping to put it back together. George just recently decided to move out and open the shop again, refusing help from anyone. He still came around to visit, but it wasn't the same old George without his other half. Ron knew for a fact that none of them would ever be the same after losing Fred.

"Are you alright?" Hermione whispered Ron, leaning in close so no one else could hear.

Meal times were always the hardest for Ron and he loved her for knowing that. He reached for her hand and squeezed it. He marveled even now that he could do this simple gesture without preamble. Ron took a shuddering breath and gave Hermione a quick kiss on her cheek.

"Yea, love. I'm fine," he whispered back. His face lit up as he watched the handful of freckles on her nose and cheeks turn crimson.

"That was brilliant, by the way, what you said to Harry out there. I love when you make him mumble like an idiot," he said quietly, remembering Hermione's comment to Harry after he caught them outside just a few minutes earlier.

She grinned shyly back at Ron, shaking her head.

"Don't remind me. I behaved like a slag in front of him so I had to say something to get that…look off his face, didn't I?"

Ron chuckled and turned to his food. He picked up his fork and took a large bite.

Around a mouthful of potatoes he said, "Don't worry about Harry. I'm sure he's over it by now. His mind obliviates on its own whenever he's around Ginny, doesn't it?" He pointed across the table with his fork, flinging food on the tabletop.

Hermione crinkled her nose at him and his uncouth manners. He waited for her to scold him for it, but instead she rolled her eyes and wiped the mess with her napkin. Ron smirked and they both turned towards Harry who was resting his chin on his hand, looking sideways at Ginny. She looked as if she was telling very funny story. Ginny suddenly laughed and snorted into her hand. Harry just looked at her with a ridiculous grin on his face.

 _The bloke's gonna starve if he keeps doing that every bloody time we eat_ , Ron thought, rolling his eyes.

He took his hand out of Hermione's and quickly swiped Harry's arm causing his face to fall dangerously close to his untouched food.

"Blimey Ron!" Ginny yelled at him, her face twitching trying not to laugh.

"Sorry, Harry," Ron said taking another bite unsympathetically. "You were doing that  _gawking_  thing again." He looked at Harry and winked.

Hermione snorted into her pumpkin juice, almost choking. Ron patted her back while sniggering at his cleverness.

Harry glared at him and opened his mouth ready to retort, but Mrs. Weasley spoke before he can get a word out.

"Ron don't do that to Harry! That could have ended in a mess," Mrs. Weasley snapped at Ron.

"I said I was sorry," Ron mumbled, stabbing at his plate, trying to catch a rogue pea. When Ron finally got it he looked up at Harry who was sitting back in his chair, staring at Ron and chewing his food with a smug look on his face.

"Wanker!" Ron coughed into his hand loudly, hoping to cover up the insult.

"Oi, I heard that!" Harry exclaimed, pointing at him accusingly. They both looked over at Mrs. Wealey to see if she noticed, but she only looked slightly annoyed. Nothing different there. Ron smiled triumphantly at Harry and continued eating. Ginny guffawed loudly and quickly stopped when Harry looked at her. She carried on eating the same as Ron trying her best to look innocent.

Harry turned to Hermione for some un-Weasley assistance.

"Why are they like this do you think?"

Hermione sighed dramatically and looked thoughtful.

"I believe it has to do with having five other siblings. Lots of practice and all that. I reckon it gets to their heads a bit," Hermione looked beyond pleased with her analysis and reached up to tug on a strand of Ron's hair.

Ron pretended to look offended as he rubbed his scalp.

Harry and Hermione laughed out loud.

They ate in silence for a few minutes until they heard Mrs. Weasley clear her throat loudly. Ron looked over at his mum and noticed her looking grim.

_Oh hell, something serious is coming. I know it._

"I think it's about time I talked to you lot about what you are planning to do come September," she said with a hitch in her voice.

Ron cringed at this turn of conversation. He wasn't sure how his mum or Hermione would take the news of him continuing on the track of becoming an Auror. He wanted to speak to Hermione in private before making a proper statement in front of everyone. He also wasn't sure what her future plans were going to be. He hadn't thought it all out yet and needed more time to make his case.

"While you were out an owl came with a message from Professor McGonagall, concerning the four of you," Mrs, Weasley continued.

"She says Hogwarts will open in September and that you are all more than welcome to finish out your 7th year there. She also informed that if you three," she indicated Ron, Harry and Hermione, "were not to go back then you may take your NEWTS on 12th of December and choose a career in the Spring," she sighed heavily as if just saying this was physically hurting her. "She needs your answers by tomorrow so she can make schedules and what have you," she finished in a hurry, waiting impatiently for their answers.

Ron looked around to his sister and best friend hoping one of them would speak first so he had more time to think of something to say.

Ginny sat straight up in her seat and flashed everyone a big smile.

"Well," she said confidently," I would like to go back for my 7th year. This past year was severely lacking anything remotely educational. I also think I have a good chance at making Quidditch captain. Well… playing Quidditch at all would be excellent."

She flipped her hair and turned to Harry. "We talked about it already and you're going to go for Auror training, right Harry?"

Ron felt Hermione go rigid next to him at Ginny's words. He didn't chance looking at her and felt his back begin to sweat.

Harry looked at Ginny with round eyes and nodded mutely, glancing at Mrs. Weasley than to Hermione. He cleared his throat and rubbed his palms together.

"Uh…yea. That's the plan anyway. Nothing is finalized yet. It's something that's been long coming so yea that's the idea…" he trailed off. Harry looked at Ron expectantly, silently pleading with him to have an even worse idea to get him off the hook.

_Sorry, mate. Looks like we're rowing the same boat._

Ron inwardly groaned and hesitated.

_They'll just have to understand that this is what I want to do. What I have to do. I want to be worthy of Hermione and not some knob of a boyfriend with nothing going for him._

He cleared his throat and faltered when he glanced at Hermione. She was faced straight ahead almost cringing in anticipation. He looked away to his mum and immediately regretted that decision. She seemed to be staring him down as if daring him to repeat what Harry just said. He looked back and forth between Hermione and his mum, not knowing where to start.

He took a deep breath and decided to just say it swiftly and as firmly as possible.

"Alright look," he said putting on his best adult voice, "I have been thinking about this for a while now and I believe…no I know… that becoming an Auror is what I want to-have to do. It's been my dream and looking back at this past year I realized that I want it-need it more than ever before. I'll take my NEWTS in December... and look for a training session that starts in the Spring."

Ron looked to Harry for support and was not disappointed.

"Cheers, mate! That's brilliant," Harry exclaimed, plastering a grin on his face. He reached out and shook Ron's hand vigorously. "Looks like we're going into training together. I can't bloody wait!"

Ron breathed out a sigh of relief and beamed gratefully at him. He looked over to Ginny and she wore a big smile as well.

"That's great Ron, really!" she said clapping her hands excitedly. "Both of you are going to be fantastic together. I'm so glad Harry's not going alone."

His mum was less excited, but he knew she was trying hard not to show it.

"That's…very mature of you, Ron," she choked out, sniffling. "I am proud of you. And you as well, Harry. Both my boys…are becoming…aurors. I had to know this was coming, didn't I?" She wiped at her eyes with her napkin and gave them a small smile. Before anyone could move to comfort her she turned to Hermione and asked her what her plans were.

Ron realized with his new enthusiasm that she had yet to say anything about his decision. He had been avoiding her response and finally looked at her giving her what he thought was the most innocent and hopeful smile.

She sat staring down at her plate with a frown.

_Well alright then. She's not happy. I didn't really expect her to be, did I?_

Ron cautiously put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently.

"Hermione, er… What do you think?"

She looked up at him in surprise and Ron knew he had just interrupted her mid-thought.

"Oh...well…but I had assumed we would all go back to school, didn't I?" she said looking around at everyone. "I mean being an auror isn't the most practical career right now, is it?"

Her eyes darted around the room, steering clear of Ron completely. His heart began to sink. If he listened closely he could hear a faint hiss of that their happy bubble slowly leaking air.

_Doesn't she realize that I'm doing this for us? She can't even pretend to be happy for me. She can't even look at me!_

Ron backed away, staring at her in bewilderment. He could feel the resentment and agitation coming out of him and knew he had to get out of there before he said or did something he regretted. He shot to his feet making Hermione finally look up at him with wide eyes.

"Where are you-"she started.

"Don't worry about it.." Ron muttered, stomping out the back door and slamming it shut.

_What the bloody hell was that? Not practical? Did she honestly think I would step foot back in that wretched place? The place that seen so many deaths…the place where I saw my own brother…_

He couldn't finish that thought or he might lose it altogether.

He stalked around to the front of the house where he last dropped his broom on the ground. He was half way there and remembered Hermione had put a spell on all their brooms that when not being used after a prescribed amount of time they would find their way back to the shed behind the house.

He growled in frustration as he doubled back around the house to make for the shed. He needed a good fly to shake off his temper and having Hermione responsible for the extra trekking, as brilliant as the spell was or not, only worsened his mood.

The shed was far enough away from the house to not be seen and he didn't want anyone knowing where he was going until he had calmed down. He was almost at the shed door when he heard Hermione's voice from behind, calling his name. He knew she couldn't see him from the Burrow, but he froze anyway, peering around the wall towards the house. He listened for her again and this time her voice took a very different tone from earlier in the day when he was on the roof. She sounded hysterical, screaming his name.

"Ron! RON!"

Worried and still fuming, he reluctantly made his way back up to the house. Halfway there he noticed Hermione spot him and came running at him, her face now as red as a tomato and her hair flying behind her. She stopped short in front of him and pushed at his chest with all her might. Of course this did little to budge him, but he was in no frame of mind to laugh at her. He can also tell she was in no mood to be laughed at.

"Bloody hell, woman! What's gotten into you?"Ron yelled at her rubbing his chest. It didn't hurt a bit, but he wanted her to feel at least a little guilty for the assault and also gain some sympathy. She didn't and he won't.

"Well,  _Ronald_ ," she started. Ron groaned out load and rolled his eyes at the use of his full name.

_So I'm Ronald now. Brilliant. If she thinks I'm going to back down to her logic and her smart talk with the big words and all that she's sorely mistaken. I'm finally right about something and she will damn well know it._

"That was exceptionally juvenile of you to run out like that in the middle of a conversation. You looked fit to be a… tot the way you stormed out without telling anyone where you were going and why!"

She shook with anger and on the verge of tears. Ron felt his anger fade at the sight of her watery eyes. A crying Hermione was not something he wanted to be responsible for. Then he remembered what she said before he left and his rage elevated once more. He breathed in sharply and balled his fists against his thighs.

"A  _tot_? Really Hermione? Is that the best you can do? I'm not a prat, eh? Not a…loser or a git perhaps? Are you sure you want to stick with… _tot_?" He knew he was being overly sarcastic, but he didn't care. Nor was he finished.

"And what was that rubbish about being  _practical_? You know how important becoming an Auror is to me and to Harry as well. We've been talking about this for years. It couldn't have come as a surprise to you, could it? Can't you be happy for me or at least try and support what I want to do? What I have to do…for us? Is that too much to ask?"

Ron was fuming. The combination of the evening humidity and his bad temper made him red in the face. There was a small part of him that felt regret as soon as he started talking, but he had to get it out. He folded his arms across his chest and glared down at her ready for a tongue lashing only Hermione can give him.

She suddenly stepped up to him, her face close enough that she had to tip her head back to glare up into his eyes. She stayed there staring at him for what seemed like a very long time. He could feel the heat emanate from her body and her breath on his neck; they were so close he couldn't resist breathing in to smell her. His mind went momentarily dizzy at her scent, still of garlic and rosemary and a hint of flowers. Jasmine perhaps? When he looked into her eyes he noticed a flicker of something other than fury. He could swear he saw traces of worry or sadness. He relaxed his shoulders and opened his mouth to speak when Hermione chose that moment to shove him again. He realized too late that she had used his weakness for her against him. He stumbled backwards and caught himself at the last second.

"What are you playing at, Hermione?" he yelled stalking up to her.

_She's gone mental! I can't believe she pushed me…and I actually almost fell over!_

"Yes, Ronald. A  _tot_! I think that sums you up pretty well If I do say so myself. And as for being an Auror how was I supposed to know you still wanted to continue with that idea? You never talk about anything regarding your future except what you want to eat for breakfast the next morning." she said through her gritted teeth. She was breathing hard with her hands on her hips.

He glanced over at the kitchen window and saw the curtains fall back into place with a hurry.

_Oh hell. As if being pushed by a girl half my size and falling over wasn't bad enough. We need to get out of sight and fast before she makes me eat my own bollocks in front of them, too._

He looked back to Hermione to find her arms crossed and her foot tapping on the ground. He would have nightmares of her foot tapping that night, he was sure of it. He shook his head determined not to let her sidetrack him from saying what needed to be said.

"And you have been so up front with your plans, have you? Did you even think to ask me about what I wanted to do? You assumed I would go back to school with you, but did you stop to think for one bleeding second what that might be like for me? What it might be like to walk the halls where I saw Fred-"

"And what about him, Ronald? Do you think he would appreciate you putting yourself in even more danger?"

He was so shocked by her words he couldn't form a proper response. She took his silence as encouragement to continue.

"And what about your mum? Hasn't she been through enough without having to worry about losing another son? How can you be so selfish?"

He glared at her in astonishment, at a total loss for words.

_Even if what she said was true how could she use Fred and my mum like that? This is not the Hermione I know at all._

Then she gasped and covered her mouth with two hands, shaking her head.

"Oh my god, Ron. I'm so sorry!" she hiccupped through her hands. "I didn't mean that. I would never- I don't know why I said those horrible things. I'm a terrible person!"

Hermione was openly crying now. Her body was shaking and her breath was shallow. Ron suddenly got a flashback of the last time he saw her like this and moved towards her. He looked again at the house and saw Harry standing inside the open door ready to interfere if he had to. This was getting out of hand and he needed to get her somewhere else to talk, and fast. He nodded to Harry letting him know he could handle this on his own. Harry nodded back and slipped inside quietly shutting the door behind him.

Hermione had her head in her hands, gasping for breath. He placed his hands on her shoulders and bent his knees in order to look in her face. As soon he touched her he felt her body let go of some tension and her breathing returned to a somewhat normal rate.

"Hermione, let's go talk somewhere more…private, yeah?"

She hummed in agreement and allowed him to steer in the opposite direction of the house.

They finally reached the shed and he held the door open for her. When she just stood there he motioned impatiently for her to get in. She shook her head fervently and pointed a shaky finger at the humid, dark and tiny shed.

"You are barking if you think I'm going to step one foot in that thing."

He rolled his eyes and lit his wand, moving it around the inside. While it wasn't clean or in the best shape the size of the inside was at least three times more than the outside would give it credit for. Different sized brooms hung along one wall. Shelves filled with muggle and wizard items climbed up another wall. There was a long table in the corner and dust all over everything.

"It's expanded on the inside. Just like our tent, remember?" He winced as soon as he uttered the word tent. They still hadn't talked about the time he left her and Harry in a lurch during the Horcrux hunt. He wasn't sure he ever wanted to sit through that conversation. She sucked in her breath and walked inside as if she never heard the last part. Grateful, he followed her in and closed the door. He lit one of the lanterns hanging from the ceiling then moved past her and hopped up on the table.

"Alright. It's just us now. I'm listening." He didn't dare say anything else as he wasn't sure how she would react anymore.

Hermione moved to stand in front of him, her hands fidgeting nervously.

"I don't know where to start. I want to say sorry about the…violent behavior. But you goaded me into it, didn't you?"

Ron shrugged noncommittally. He wasn't about to admit any wrong doing at this point.

"And you have to know that I would never say those things to you in a right mind. I would take it back if I could. I honestly don't know what's gotten into me. Everything has been so great between us I would hate for something like this to break us apart."

He took both her hands in his and thought hard before he opened his mouth to speak.

"For such a smart witch you sure are daft sometimes," he said. Hermione frowned and yanked her hands back, crossing them in front of her.

_Well thinking doesn't always work for me, now has it? Lesson learned._

"No no! I didn't mean to upset you, but why on earth would you think we would break apart? I'm in love with you, remember?" He took her hands back and gripped them tightly. Ron looked at her intently, trying to express his feelings the best way he could.

"What you said was…shocking to say the least. Thank you for taking it back, but there is some truth to what you said. I know the risk involved, but I need you to understand that this is something that I have to see through. I know we're still young, but I don't see anyone else for me. You're it, Hermione. I want to make you proud and provide for you. For both of us. I have to start now, sooner than later. Please say you understand?"

He waited for her to respond and when she didn't say anything he pulled her closer to him. He could feel her resisting and became even more confused than he was before.

"What are you thinking right now?" he asked her.

She pulled away abruptly and walked to the shelves of mixed artifacts, her back to him.

"I can't think properly when you're that close to me," Hermione said quietly, visibly shaken.

She picked up a cube covered in brightly colored squares and turned it in her hand. She turned back around to look at him. "And right now I need to think and make sure I don't say anything else I will regret."

Ron sat back on his hands and decided to just listen.

He stared at her hands while she twisted the object around. It made sharp clicking sounds and the colors passed up and around each other the more she worked with it. He had no clue how she knew how it worked or even what it was, but he was hypnotized. Plus it helped him stay on task of staying mute.

"I want to be honest with you," she said, still working her hands around the object. "This isn't about Fred or your mum, really. Although in some ways it is if you look at it pragmatically."

She stopped what she was doing and leaned against the empty wall, squinting at the cube as if trying to figure it out.

"May I talk now?"

"No," she answered, abruptly coming off the wall and pulling herself up on the bench to sit next to him. Her breathing was labored and she refused to look at him. "Just give me a minute."

Hermione leaned forward and worked faster on the colorful cube, her hands flying over it making the colors blur together. Ron looked over at her face and was immediately turned on. Her bottom lip was pinched between her teeth as she worked. He sighed thinking about how much he wanted to pry that lip out from there and trap it between his own lips, forgetting the whole discussion altogether. However, he had a feeling the reason for her fixation on this muggle thing was her own way of de-stressing. As Ron watched her he felt his own body relaxing, the clicks of the cube actually not irritating him at all. He waited patiently for her to finish whatever it was she was supposed to do with that thing,

"Yes!" Hermione yelled triumphantly holding the cube out in front of her. Then she slammed it on the table between them with a bang. Ron jumped back unexpectedly and looked down at the cube expecting it to blow up in his face. When he realized it was harmless he picked it up and turned it in his hands. Each side, where there used to be different colored squares mixed together, were now squares of the same color making each side look like one solid colored square. He stared at her in amazement.

"But how did you- without magic…what did you-"

She rolled her eyes and snatched it from him setting it on her other side, out of reach.

"For heaven's sake, Ron. It's just a toy."

"You're brilliant. Do you know that?" he said softly.

Ron turned to gaze at her lovingly. It felt safe to compliment her now that he was back to being good old Ron again. He grinned when he saw her lips quirk up in a tiny smile.

_I'm so lucky to have this girl. She could curse me from here to next Tuesday and I'll still love every bloody thing she does._

"I love you, too Ron. So much. Too much, in fact," she said while tracing one finger around his eyebrow. He sighed and smiled in relief.

"The reason I reacted so badly was because…I can't stand the thought of something happening to you. I mean of course that's normal to not want the person you love in danger but… when I think about what you're willing to put yourself through I can't help but take it personally. I feel so selfish thinking only of how it will affect me. I never even thought about your mum or Fred before I said those things. They were just excuses so you wouldn't blame me as the only reason for not becoming an Auror. Well, of course that backfired… Does that make any sense?"

"Yes it does, Hermione. I wish you had explained this to me before." Ron hesitated and spoke carefully. "I have to ask you something. You know how just now, outside, when you couldn't breathe and everything? This happened before, didn't it? That time on the sofa when you had that nightmare and woke up out of breath…did it feel the same? I mean what was that exactly?"

Hermione grimaced and looked at him through her lashes. "Yes," she whispered. "That time on the sofa…I never had a nightmare. At least not on that night anyway. I'm not sure what that was. I remember thinking about so many things and it all coming at me at once like a tidal wave or something. I saw spots and everything was spinning. It just closed me up I suppose and I couldn't get any air in." She raised her head and looked fully at Ron for the first time since they entered the shed.

"But you helped me. I don't know how you knew what to do, but it worked and I was fine. I was better than fine, wasn't I?" she smiled at him through glassy eyes.

Ron remembered back to how he reacted instinctively to her distress and how his touch and voice seemed to calm her down. He had to admit to himself he felt rather great about it, especially for what happened afterwards.

"And just now, out there," Hermione continued, "I felt that same pressure coming down on me and I thought I might lose it again. But when you touched me I just felt…safe. I don't know how else to explain it. You're so wonderful and I'm a total mess."

She sniffed and looked to the side dejectedly. Ron took her face and turned it so she had no choice but to look at him again.

"Hermione you need to listen like you have never listened before, alright?" he said it so firmly all she did was nod and open her eyes really big.

"As confused as you are about what's going on I am just as confused, if not more. But that does  _not_  make you a mess. It also doesn't mean that you have to go through it alone. I can't believe you've been worrying about this for so long and I never knew. You have to trust me, Hermione. I know I can be a prat sometimes and, let's be honest here, a right tot, but I will always be here. I'm not leaving you and I sure as hell hope you're not going to leave me. We'll figure out together how to make it all work. We have to, don't we?"

Hermione sniffed loudly and nodded her head, smiling widely at him. He let out a shaky laugh and touched his forehead to hers.

"You're not a prat or a tot," Hermione whispered against his mouth causing him to grin and chuckle."You're…mine,"

"Bloody hell, woman. I've always been yours."

He reached out and pulled at the hair tie releasing her ponytail, spilling long brown curls down around her shoulders and arms. He ran his fingers through her scalp and down her hair to the very end strands near her elbow. He watched as Hermione closed her eyes and bit her lip harder than before. He grunted with desire and sat up closer. He cupped her cheeks, his big freckled hands met at her chin, thumbs pressing into her flushed cheeks and over her bottom lip pulling it out slowly. There were white marks where her teeth had clenched it so tightly. He rubbed his thumb over her pouted lip until it was its normal rosy color again.

She exhaled a long breath as if she had been holding it for hours. She opened her eyes and he was blown away by the intensity he saw in them.

".. so bloody gorgeous," he breathed into her mouth.

"Oh, Ron," Hermione moaned softly. Her hands made their way to the back of his head and stroked his hair.

Ron hummed with longing. He closed his eyes and leaned forward, capturing her swollen lip in his mouth and sucked gently. Without losing his hold on her mouth he wrapped his long arms around her waist and their bodies collided together in the middle. They were both so hot from the summer weather and the enclosed space that it made their clothes damp with sweat and slippery. He rubbed his chest against hers and moaned with desire when he felt the fullness of her breasts crushed against him. She suddenly pulled away from him, breathing heavily. He sat back on the table.

_Shite! I did it again. When am I going to ever going to get this right dammit?_

"Hermione, I'm sorry! I thought-"

"It's ok, Ron," Hermione said swinging her right leg over his lap and kneeling in front of him. She brushed his damp hair off his forehead with trembling fingers.

"I just wanted to be more comfortable. You also looked like your back was going to snap from bending like that."

She chuckled and sat down fully on his lap causing Ron to gasp sharply at the sudden closeness of this new position.

Hermione slid closer to his body and he saw stars. Even through her jeans and his trousers he could feel himself get hard from the pressure of her bum rubbing against him. His hands instantly went to her waist to still her. He looked into her eyes and saw nothing but affection and longing. He felt the same way, but as the gentleman he was brought up to be he had to make sure.

"Are you alright with…this?" he asked her gesturing his hands towards their connected bodies.

She giggled, which Ron thought sounded like music coming from her lips. Anyone else would have sounded ridiculous.

"Eloquent as always, Ron."

She grabbed his face forcefully and kissed him, laughing against his lips. He joined in her laughter not really getting what was so funny since his mind was a puddle at this point. He didn't care. He got her to smile and giggle and that was enough for him. He could feel the tears on her face wet his cheeks and wiped them away.

Hermione rocked her hips against him again and this time Ron thrust upwards to meet her. They both groaned loudly at the intimate contact.

"Yea this is alright," Hermione grinned at him mischievously.

"More than alright, don't you think? I would say more like fucking excellent," Ron said before grabbing her tightly around her waist, his hands around her ribs stroking up and down her back and around to her stomach.

Hermione was clutching at his shoulders, pulling him against her not wanting any space between them. Their tongues clashed against each other's teeth as their lips moved frantically over one another.

Ron's hands became a blur over her body touching her everywhere his hands could reach. He grabbed the top of her thighs and squeezed them, pulling her down harder onto him.

Hermione released his mouth and titled her head to bite his earlobe. Ron felt a jolt of electricity shoot through him. He placed soft wet kisses on her chin, then her neck all the way down to her shoulders. He hooked the strap of her tank top and bra in one finger and slipped it down her arm. He nuzzled her shoulder with his nose taking in her intoxicating scent.

"Oh my god. This feels so good," Hermione moaned against his neck as she began sucking on the skin there.

Her hands roamed around to his back bunching his shirt up and raking her nails against his spine. Ron gasped into her mouth.

They were no longer kissing as their rhythm accelerated. He could feel Hermione's nails dig into his shoulder blades. His hardness was straining against his trousers as the friction mounted. He clasped onto her small waist and held on as waves of bliss washed over him, clouding his mind of everything except Hermione. All of a sudden Hermione's body went rigid as she held him close. She was holding her breath, her lips against his chin, not moving.

"Ron! Oh my god. It feels so…oh Ron! Oh my god! Oh!" Hermione screeched, shaking violently for a long moment before he body collapsed against him.

Suddenly, with a burst Ron felt the release… and the mess between their legs. As his head cleared his body felt exhausted as if he just ran a mile in wet clothing. Still holding Hermione tight against him he rested his head on hers and closed his eyes.

"I love you so bloody much," he whispered in her hair.

Hermione slowly pulled away from him and looked dreamily into his eyes. She looked more relaxed in that instant than in all the years he's known her. She blinked slowly and gave him a lazy smile, patting his cheek.

"Yes, Ron. I know you do," she said resting her head once more on his shoulder. She turned her head to plant a small kiss on his shoulder. "I love you so much. How did I get so lucky?"

Ron just sighed and held her closer until it was time to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I hope you guys liked it! I had so much fun writing in Ron's POV these past two chapters, but it's on to Hermione next. It won't be too long between chapters from now on. Thank you so much for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all the lovely reviews and story alerts! I know I have a lot to learn and have room to grow, but I'm really enjoying the writing process. So thank you for sticking with this story! Special thanks to Arlene once again for all her wonderful insights and support.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

"Fucking hell, it's too damn bloody hot out there!" Ron said, following Hermione into the kitchen.

"Ron, really. Do you have to swear?" Hermione hissed at Ron, without turning around.

"Er…Hermione, it's only us. Besides if you had my pale skin you would be swearing your arse off!" Ron's hissed at her back.

Hermione twisted around to scold him more, but her breath caught in her throat. Ron was using the hem of his Chudley Cannons t-shirt to wipe sweat off his brow revealing his abdomen and half his chest. Hermione licked her lips as her eyes traced over the freckles spattered across his sweaty upper body connecting the dots until she came to his abdomen. Then she noticed the waistband of his pants peeking out from under his trousers hanging low on his waist. She blinked slowly and her mind started to blur with desire when suddenly her view was obstructed by something offensively orange. Her eyes snapped up to Ron's face to find him looking at her with a knowing grin. He had dropped his shirt back down and ran his hands through his soaked hair with both hands making it fall on his head in weird angles in wet tangles. His cheeks were red from the heat and she thought he never looked more attractive.

_Oh why does he have to look so gorgeous at the same time I'm about to yell at him? He must have some kind of radar. Hermione's upset…let me flash a part of my body and give her a smile to melt her insides and totally…oh never mind. You're still annoyed, remember?_

She composed herself and rolled her eyes at him hoping to look more irritated than she actually was.

"Oh you know how I feel about you swearing, especially when there are so many people around," Hermione mumbled, not really into the lecture as she was a moment ago.

She turned around again and started searching through the cupboards of the Burrow's kitchen. She knew she came in here for a reason and now for the life of her could not remember what that something was.

She crouched down to rummage in a lower cabinet hoping something will spark her memory. Ron had this effect on her and she was still deciding if that was good or a bad thing. She sifted through a mountain of pots and pans, making them spill out onto the floor. She cringed at the amount of noise it made and stood up quickly in frustration. Ron walked up to her quickly using his wand to send them back inside neatly and closing the door.

"It's ok, Hermione they're just pots. No harm done…Are you alright?" Ron placed a hand on her arm, looking at her with great concern.

Hermione looked at him, confused. Then she realized what he must have thought and became genuinely annoyed.

"I know  _that_!" Hermione exclaimed. She pushed his hand away and crossed her arms. "What did you think? I was going to lose my mind because some pots and pans fell on the floor? For goodness sake, Ron. Give me some credit!"

"No, of course not. It's just that with the noise and you were really upset just now and…" Ron sighed and stepped up close to her again and ran his hands up and down her arms. "Look I'm sorry. I'm trying, ok? I'm only trying to help," he said quietly and kissed her forehead.

She sighed at his touch and closed her eyes when his lips met her face. She knew he was trying his best to be patient with her and if she were honest with herself she was not making it easy for him.

As September came closer she felt herself becoming more and more nervous about her choice to go back to Hogwarts knowing that Ron and Harry wouldn't be joining her. Logically she knew this was something she had to do. She couldn't consciously get credit for a year that she never completed. She also understood why Ron and Harry chose to take their NEWTS in December, but that was only because they knew what they wanted to do for their careers. Hermione was still undecided and hoped that a year of education would help her reach that decision.

"Yes I realize that, Ron. I'm sorry I snapped at you," Hermione said. She smiled sadly and placed her hands on Ron's chest. "You've truly been wonderful. I don't know what I would do without you. How I'm going to survive a whole year without this."

Ron held her hands in place and moved in closer, trapping their hands between their bodies and backing her up against the kitchen counter. Ron's hands were nestled between Hermione's breasts and she could feel his heart beating fast. She knew hers wasn't too far behind.

"Hermione, we've talked about this already. I love you and nothing will change that. Let's not get into all that sad stuff now. This is supposed to be a happy day, remember?" Ron spoke quietly and bent down to kiss her cheek and rubbed his stubble against her chin. She loved the feeling of his rough unshaven skin against her face and she knew he knew it because he did it often.

"Mmm…love you too," Hermione murmured.

Their rendezvous from the shed sparked something new and exciting in their relationship that neither of them could have predicted. She felt a weight lifted off of her chest after admitting her fears and doubts to Ron and was surprised at how thoughtful and careful he was with her. At times it grated her nerves when he asked one too many times if she was sure she was alright. It was during those brief moments that she regretted saying anything in the first place, but then he would do or say something so unexpectedly amazing. He had matured so much. He didn't seem as insecure as he used to be and actually thought before he spoke. Well, most of the time. This was still Ron after all and she wouldn't have him any other way.

Hermione sighed and dropped her head back allowing his more room to kiss up her neck. She shivered then grinned when he blew into her ear softly before taking her earlobe between his teeth. She rotated her hips and instantly felt the temperature rise in the already sweltering summer heat. Ron groaned and pressed his hardness against her using his left knee to spread her legs and settle himself between them. They both gasped at the closeness of their bodies and began grinding against each other.

She loved when it was like this between them. They had to be careful not to get caught, but that was becoming more difficult every day. They agreed to wait before they took it all the way, but that only fueled the tension between them. If this is how it felt to just kiss and touch him she could only imagine how it would feel once they got truly intimate.

"I love this dress. Is it new?" Ron whispered in her ear.

She could feel the smirk against her neck and giggled softly at his late compliment. Ginny made her buy a new dress especially for today and Ron hadn't seemed to notice, until now anyway. It was a plain pale blue cotton summer dress, sleeveless and ended at her knees in soft ruffles. She thought it was simple and innocent enough, but the way Ron just complimented it made her feel like she was wearing something much…sexier.

He freed his hand from hers and grabbed the back of her neck, pulling her in for searing kiss. Hermione smiled against his lips and gripped Ron's shoulder with one hand while wrapping one leg around his hip. He immediately took his other hand and ran it up her bare leg until it was under her dress. His fingers grazed the edge of her knickers next to her bum and she couldn't help but pull him in closer. They were both panting into each other's mouths and touching all over when they heard the back door wrench open. Hermione dropped her leg and pushed Ron off of her making him stumble backwards.

"Oh now  _that_  is disgusting. Really you guys!" Ginny exclaimed loudly from the doorway. Her bright red hair was in a long plait over her shoulder and she was wearing a dress similar to Hermione's, only in a dark green color and much shorter with low trainers on her feet instead of feminine sandals like Hermione chose to wear. Ginny was holding a platter of crumbs that used to hold sandwiches in her hands. Hermione flinched when Ginny stomped into the kitchen, dumped it unceremoniously into the sink and whipped around to point her finger at them.

"You two are lucky Harry didn't walk in here and find you both attacking each other…again," she hissed at them with narrowed eyes. "You can't hold it in until  _after_  his bloody birthday party? You don't see us gallivanting around snogging where anyone can see us do you?"

Ron rounded on her suddenly devoid of embarrassment.

"Oi! Let's not forget the time I walked in on you and Harry in  _my_  room eating each other's faces. You want to talk about disgusting? I couldn't eat for hours afterwards."

"Ha! That is completely different and you know it, Ron!" Ginny yelled back. "We didn't look like we were 2 seconds away from shagging did we?"

"Oh please," Ron groaned. "Don't ever put that picture in my head ever again. Besides you were on  _my_  bed for fuck's sake!"

_Hermione rolled her eyes. Why can't he just forget it? Ginny has a point. It was Harry's birthday and anyone besides Ginny could have walked in on us. Better Ginny than Mr. Weasley._

Hermione shivered at that thought and pulled on Ron's hand. "Ron, forget it. She's right. Let's go back outside, yeah?" She felt him calm down and he gripped her hand back.

Ginny also seemed to relax and said, "Sorry we used your bed, alright? Let it go Ron!" She rolled her eyes and smiled at Hermione. "Actually I came in here because everyone was asking where the drinks went."

"Oh right! That's what I came in here for!" Hermione gasped as her memory coming back to her. Then she got another idea and let go of Ron's hand to run to the ice box and get two pitchers of pumpkin juice. She shoved them in Ron's arms and pushed him out of the door.

"Bloody hell, Hermione! Why are you pushing me?" Ron asked trying not to spill any on him.

"Never mind, Ron. I'll...um be right out. I have to talk to Ginny for a second. Girl stuff. Wait for me outside, yeah?" Hermione said breathlessly with a smile. Ginny laughed when Hermione closed the door on his confused face. She heard him mutter something about barmy women and watched through the curtain until he got to the table where a large number of people were still talking and laughing, enjoying the party.

"Ok Hermione what is so important that you had to practically shove my brother out the door? Don't get me wrong that was worth the expression on his face, but what's up?" Ginny said pulling herself onto the kitchen counter. She paused and looked down at where she sat, scrunched up her nose and immediately hopped down to the floor.

"So gross," Ginny muttered to herself before flopping down in a dining chair and looked up at Hermione with interest.

Hermione sat in a chair across from her and took a deep breath. She didn't know how to phrase what she wanted to say. She didn't think she would be having this conversation with anyone. But she knew if anyone were going to be honest and discreet it would be Ginny.

"Have you and Harry shagged?" Hermione blurted out.

Ginny froze for a second then grinned widely. "Why do you want to know?" she asked cheekily.

"Well," Hermione said looking down at the table, "Ron and I haven't yet and I was wondering if you did then maybe I could ask you some questions about it." She was so embarrassed she thought her face might explode from the heat rising in her cheeks.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, Hermione, but as much as I would like to say we have I can't," Ginny said then snorted. "Harry's too much of a bloody gentleman trust me. It's taken me this long to get him to grab my tits. By the looks of it you and my brother are a hop and a skip away from the big bang yourselves. What do you need my advice for anyways?"

Hermione chuckled at her candor. She could always count on Ginny to be brutally honest with her. It was refreshing after being coddled by Ron for so long.

"Ron and I decided to wait before we went that far, but I think he might want to...do it sooner and I just don't want to disappoint him, that's all," Hermione said with a shrug.

"You have met my brother, right? Ron, I mean. The tall bloke with the freakish big hands and sloppy hair? The one who trips all over himself anytime you enter a room? I honestly don't think there is anything you can do wrong according to him." She took Hermione's hand and looked her straight in the eyes. "Don't worry so bloody much. I swear you'll get wrinkles the way you go on sometimes, which is a damn hard thing to do being a witch and all."

Hermione laughed, feeling better. "Yes, of course. I'm just being silly. He tells me all the time that he doesn't mind waiting so I should just believe him and not worry so much about it. Thanks, Ginny. You always know exactly what to say, don't you?"

Ginny sat up straight looking rather smug. "Why yes I do! Now remember what I said in the beginning of summer. Spare me the details!" Then she laughed and stood up. "Come on let's light Harry's cake and get it out to him before he turns 30."

They laughed as they stuck 18 candles into the chocolate cake that Mrs. Weasley baked that morning. It was a round cake with the words Happy Birthday Harry written in gold icing. Hermione thought it was simple and perfect for Harry.

They used their wands to light the candles and carry it outside. Everyone sang to Harry as he blew out the candles. He gave Ginny a sweet kiss before she grabbed a handful of cake and smashed it in Harry's face. Everyone laughed, including Harry who chased a screeching Ginny around trying to kiss her with his face still covered in icing and cake. Hermione was having a great time catching up with old friends from school. Dean, Seamus, Luna and Neville all made it for the party so it was a reunion of sorts. Then she felt Ron take her arm and pull her aside from everyone else.

"Hey are you alright? What did you want to talk to Ginny about? Did you start to feel out of sorts again? Because you shouldn't hide it from me. You know I can take it. I can-"

"Ron! No it wasn't that at all. Just girl stuff," Hermione stopped him. "And I would never hide anything from you. We agreed remember?"

"Yea I know, love. Have I told you how fuck- I mean extremely…lovely you look today?" Ron wrapped his arms around her waist and smiled down at her. She bit her lip and smiled warily back at him. She didn't want to tell him she was asking his little sister for advice on shagging so in effect she was going back on her word. She figured she was safe since anything said between two girl friends should stay between them. Plus it was too embarrassing to admit the truth.

"You did mention something about the dress, but I thought you were only inquiring where you can get one of your own." Hermione said flatly then laughed when Ron pinched her side.

"Oh cheeky now, are we?" Ron grinned at her.

She reached up to cup his cheek. "Don't worry so much, love. You'll get wrinkles, did you know?" she said with a grin and patted his cheek.

She sauntered away from him with a smirk and made her way towards their group of friends. Ron caught up and walked along side leaning over to whisper hastily in her ear, "Meet me in my room at half past 11 tonight. I'll take care of Harry."

She snapped her head up to look at him, but he was already ahead of her talking to Harry about starting a Quidditch game. Ron's parents had gone back inside as more of their friends joined in and soon separated into teams, flying in the air. Hermione never had as much enthusiasm for Quidditch so she sat on the grass with Crookshanks and followed Ron's form in the sky.

Her mind reeled at why he could possibly want her to come into his room after everyone else was asleep. Mrs. Weasley made the rules very clear early on that under no circumstances were any of them to be alone in any bedroom at any time of day. Of course this was after Ron caught Harry and Ginny on  _his_  bed and made such a scene it wasn't long until they all got the lecture about decency and respect and overall embarrassing topics that Hermione would rather forget about.

Hermione's face suddenly grew hot thinking back to the way Ron's hands felt on her skin, on her leg all the way up to her knickers. She closed her eyes and let her mind wander to what might have happened had they not been interrupted, but instead of the kitchen she changed the location to his bedroom. Breaking the rules was against her nature, but she was willing to risk it this once. The way he just whispered that invitation in her ear sent tingles down her spine and she bit her lip in anticipation and nervousness. She was happy with where they were at physically in their relationship. It was fun to get him all hot and bothered and he never pushed her for anything more.

_But what if he wants to take things further? Of course I do at some point, but tonight? There's so much going on in my head right now I can't possibly be ready for…that. Maybe before September we can…oh no September. Why did I have to remind myself again? Back to happy thoughts of knickers and hands…_

Before Hermione could get back to her fantasy a scream that sounded like Ginny's voice came from over her head. She opened her eyes and shot to her feet, wand out and ready to curse someone. What she saw made her heart stop.

Ron had fallen off his broom from high up in the air and hit the ground with a loud thump. Her hands flew to her mouth to muffle her scream. She ran at breakneck speed towards his figure lying on the ground, getting there before anyone else was able to touch down.

"Oh my god, Ron. Are you ok? Ron?" She cried falling to her knees beside him.

He was unconscious, sprawled out on his back, his left arm was bent at a weird angle and his face looked like it had been hit by a…bludger. Harry and Ginny came running up to them and crouched down with her.

"Come on, mate. What the hell?" Harry turned Ron's face to look at where all the blood was coming from and bent over to listen to his chest.

_Oh my god there's so much blood! What if he can't find a heartbeat?_

Hermione pushed Harry aside and put her own ear to Ron's chest. She could hear his heart beating still and breathed a sigh of relief. She heard Ginny tell Neville and Luna to get Mrs. Weasley. Then Seamus stepped up and started talking about how he was sure Ron saw the bludger coming at him and thought he was going to block it. On and on he went and Hermione knew he felt badly for what happened. She just nodded at him and looked up at Ron's face and saw where the bludger must have made contact. There was a gash near his temple and a lump forming underneath it.

_Why isn't he waking up? What if he has internal bleeding? Broken ribs? Concussion?...brain damage?_

She couldn't stop the assault of worst case scenarios playing out in her mind. She felt the air leaving her lungs in shallow breaths and squeezed her eyes shut against the hundreds of tiny lights that danced across her eyes. She started gasping and clutched at her chest sobbing.

_Oh god no! Not now! He needs me to stay strong and help him. This cannot be happening right now._

"Hermione! Oh my god, are you ok?" she heard Harry exclaim next to her. He went to grab her shoulders but she yanked out of his grasp and groped along the grass for Ron's hand.

Still crying and gasping for air she found Ron's hand and pulled it up to her chest. His touch always had the effect of calming her down like a bucket of cold water dumped on her head. She waited for her breath to come back and for her vision to return to normal. When they didn't she opened her eyes and looked at Ginny who was across from her looking horrified.

"Its…not…working!" She panted between breaths. Ginny shook her head in shock and looked over Hermione's shoulder at Harry for help.

She heard Mrs. Weasley approaching asking lots of questions and sounding hysterical. She sounded so far away.

Harry touched her shoulder and Hermione heard him say in a tiny calm voice, "Hermione its ok. We'll take him to St. Mungo's. I'm sure it's just a concussion or something."

"You don't…understand," Hermione turned to look at Harry but the movement made her dizzy. Harry's face swam in front of her and turned on its side. She heard him yell her name before everything went silent.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild warning: Some smutty fluff towards the end…
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter…at all.

Hermione's eyes snapped open as sounds suddenly came rushing through her ears. She sat up quickly and instantly regretted it. Her head was spinning, but before she could take a look around she found herself being crushed by another body.

"Hermione!" Ron had gathered her up in his arms and pressing her close to him so tight she thought her ribs might crack. Instead of protesting she hugged him back eagerly.

"Oh thank goodness! You're alright...You're alive!" Hermione cried out and breathed a big sigh of relief. The last time she saw him he was laid out on the ground and unconscious. After all the evil they conquered and battles they fought she couldn't believe she could lose him over a game of Quidditch, of all things. Then she groaned silently when she realized how many people witnessed her panic attack and cringed when she remembered she actually fainted.

"Hermione dear," she heard Mrs. Weasley say from behind Ron, "would you like some tea?"

Hermione didn't realize there was anyone else in the room with them. She smiled weakly at Mrs. Weasley and nodded. She didn't trust herself to talk just then. Mrs. Weasley went to the kitchen and came back quickly with a cup of steaming hot tea.

"Are you sure you're alright, Hermione?" Mrs. Weasley asked after giving Hermione the tea and watching her take a sip. She reached out and placed her hand against her forehead. "You're not looking well, dear."

"Yes," Hermione said quietly. "I'm fine thanks." She put the cup down on the coffee table and looked at Ron's face. He was looking at her with the same concern and confusion that was in his mother's voice.

"Hermione," Ron said while brushing her hair out of her face, "What happened? I know I fell off my broom and when I came to my mum had already mended my broken arm and the cut on my head. But then Harry told me you had an…episode and fainted. Is that true?"

The wound on his head did in fact look healed and the rest of his body didn't seem to be injured at all. She looked over at Mrs. Weasley who was sitting on the chair across from the sofa. She was wringing her hands and looking at Hermione intently, waiting for a response. Before Hermione could speak Ginny walked in from the kitchen.

"Mum," Ginny said, "Everything's cleaned up and everyone went home…Oh Hermione!"

She rushed over to her and budged Ron over so she can sit beside Hermione.

"Oi! What the hell Ginny?"

"Oh shut it Ron. You'll get to hold her soon enough. Let others get a turn will you?" Ginny turned to Hermione with a sweet smile and hugged her tightly.

"You scared the magic out of me! What the bloody hell happened out there?"

Hermione was at a loss for words. She was still trying to figure out what was going on and now she had to answer so many questions and worried looks. She stuttered her words and looked down at her hands.

"Ginny!" Mrs. Weasley shouted. "Show some tact. The poor girl just fainted. She doesn't need you being so callous about it."

Ginny looked genuinely hurt and taken aback. "I wasn't! Honest I was just worried like everyone else!"

"It's ok," Hermione said finally. She smiled, trying her best to look normal even though the urge to open up a hole in the floor and disappear forever was growing bigger with every minute she sat there.

"I know you're only concerned. I'm fine really. I was just in shock I guess…and the heat must have played a factor into it. I barely ate anything at dinner after all… "

Ginny frowned back at her, not seeming satisfied. Then Hermione looked over at Ron who was staring at her in disbelief. She thought he looked upset and frowned at him silently asking him what the matter was. He shook his head and hung his head down to the floor with a scowl on his face.

Hermione glanced over at Mrs. Weasley to reassure her but she was looking at Ron's reaction with her own troubled look.

_Oh no what's happening now? Am I that transparent? And why is Ron so upset? I don't want to give his family something else to worry about. I'll just have to work on handling myself better, that's all._

"Hermione, the way Harry described it seemed like you are having some…issues not breathing and having problems focusing. He said you became dizzy and fainted. If there is something else going on then maybe you should see someone," Mrs. Weasley said.

Hermione was speechless…again. She really didn't like this feeling of not knowing what to say. Thankfully Harry came down from upstairs at that moment and halted on the doorway, saving her from having to come up with another excuse.

"Er…what's going on? Oh Hermione, you're awake." He came to sit on the other side of Hermione after giving Ron a curious look. He was still staring down at the floor, deep in thought and it was starting to worry Hermione to no end.

"How are you feeling?" Harry said, peering at her through his glasses. "I've never seen you like that before. You still look a bit peaky. Do you want to lie down?"

She rolled her eyes in frustration and gritted her teeth. This was beginning to sound like an intervention and she was not going to have any part in it. All she wanted was to get Ron alone and talk to him about what happened. She needed to feel his arms around her and tell her it was ok. The fact that she couldn't touch him and that he wouldn't even look at her was killing her inside.

_Why can't they just leave it alone? Ron was the one who got hurt, not me. I don't want all this attention put on me. This family has been through enough without me adding to it._

Hermione felt like her head was going to explode. She felt her face heat up from her cheeks to her hairline and couldn't hold it in any longer.

"I said I was fine, alright?" She shouted. "Just leave it alone!"

She cringed at how harsh the words came out, but she couldn't help it. She was so irritated that she just needed everything to stop. Forgetting how dizzy she still was she shot to her feet and turned around to face Ginny and Harry who both stared at her in shock. She swayed on the spot and put her hand on her head. Ron jumped up and held her around her waist, keeping her steady. She took a deep breath and felt her face return to its normal temperature.

"Come on, Hermione," Ron said in a low voice leading her towards the kitchen. "Let's get you some water, yeah?"

Hermione just nodded, but before they walked out the room Mrs. Weasley stood up and patted Hermione's hand.

"You have family here with you. Don't worry about that. If you ever need to talk just know that I'm here ok?"

Hermione smiled back with a lump in her throat. She was so touched and was reminded of how much she missed her own parents. She thought about how they still didn't remember her and vowed right then to insist on the Ministry helping her reverse the spell she cast on them. She had waited long enough and it was about time she got them back.

"Yes I know. I'm…so sorry for blowing up like that. It's been a stressful day, that's all," Hermione managed to get out. She hated that she made Mrs. Weasley worry about her. She just lost a son and had a scare with another one of her children that night. Hermione never felt more like a trespasser in the Weasley home.

"Alright, then. Time for me to head up to bed. Don't stay up too late dears," Mrs. Weasley gave them all each a hug and made her way upstairs leaving the four of them downstairs on their own. Harry stood up and walked over to Hermione giving her a hug. She was surprised after she shouted at the both of them but she knew Harry could never be mad at her for long.

"I know something isn't right," he whispered in her ear quickly. "Tell me when you're ready."

_I should have known better than to try and hide something from him. He knows me too well._

Harry took Ginny's hand and practically dragged her to the kitchen. Ginny looked back to smile at her reassuringly and mouthed silently that they'll talk later.

Hermione sighed and dropped down in Mrs. Weasley's vacated chair. She covered her face with her hands and groaned out loud. "They all must think I've gone mad, don't they?" She dropped her hands and stared up at him. Ron cast a silencing charm around the room then kneeled down in front of her and crossed his arms over her knees.

"Do you?" she asked in a small voice.

_Please don't say you think I'm nuts and need to be thrown in a white rubber room. Do they even have those is the Wizarding world?_

"Hermione," he said looking at her intently. "I don't think you've gone mad. I just…" He paused as if trying to think of the right words to say.

_Oh no this must be bad if he has to think before he talks. Doesn't he realize by now that never works for him?_

She leaned forward to place her hands on his arm.

"Ron, can I talk first?"

Ron opened his mouth to object, but Hermione shook her head at him. "Let me say this, please…" She cleared her throat and looked down at her fingers, playing with the ginger hairs around his wrist. She felt Ron shiver slightly and took a deep breath to continue. "When I saw you fall off your broom…" Hermione took a deep breath and Ron immediately wrapped his hand around hers and nodded to keep her talking.

"I was terrified when you wouldn't wake up. I mean we've seen Harry fall off his broom too many times to count, but this felt so different. It was  _you_. And there was blood…and your arm was…twisted. I didn't know what to think."

Images of Ron lying on the ground flashed in front of her and new tears rolled down her face as she started crying in earnest.

"Then the same things started happening like before. I couldn't get any… air in and I felt lightheaded. Usually all I have to do is hear you or touch you to make me feel better, but…I guess I was too far gone…or something. And- and then my hearing went all fuzzy… Harry said something but I don't remember what it was. Then…nothing. I woke up and…you were ok. " Hermione smiled through her tears and looked up at Ron, touching his face where the bludger hit him. "You are ok, right? You let your mum fully heal you? No broken bones?"

Ron pulled her off the chair and onto his lap. She sobbed into his shirt as he stroked her back to soothe her. She felt a familiar calm wash over her. She should have felt silly breaking down like that in front of Ron. A year ago today she would have been so embarrassed, but given everything they have been through together she knew she could trust him with anything.

"Of course I'm alright, love. Fully healed, I promise" he said quietly. He pulled back and looked her in the eyes. "I…I thought I knew how to help you, but after today I realize I have no idea what to do and that scares the hell out of me."

His voice broke and he sniffed, shaking his head avoiding her eyes. Hermione felt her heart break watching him. He looked so disappointed in himself. She shook her head, frowning and cupped his face in her hands. She gasped when Ron backed away from her and hauled her up to her feet. He started pacing around the room. Hermione wiped the tears off her face and reached out to grab his arm. He stopped in front of her and grabbed her hands.

"I knew you were having difficulty with stress or whatever and I should have paid closer attention. I should have known there was something more to it. I'm so sorry."

"No, Ron! You have helped me more than you know. You always seem to know the right thing to say and how to calm me down. I can't believe you blame yourself. But I don't want you to carry this…burden of taking care of me. It's not fair to you, I know that."

Ron sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He grabbed her shoulders and lowered his head to look at her properly. "Hermione, I love you. I want to take care of you. I take what we have very seriously which is why I think that maybe this might be beyond what either of us can handle…Maybe you should see someone like my mum said?" He looked at her expectantly, almost scared for her reaction. She hated the idea of talking to a stranger about her feelings.

 _Ron is the only one who really knows what's going on,_ Hermione thought _. Actually, that's not true now is it? Everyone saw what happened today and I would be lying if I thought they would all let it go. And I can't let Ron continue to beat himself up about this. No matter what he says this is not his problem and I don't want this relationship to become all about me and my problems._

"I love you too, Ron. And you're right. I should see someone. I'll look into it tomorrow. I promise." Her voice was tight, but she was determined to show him that she was willing to put her reservations aside for the sake of their relationship.

Ron let out the air he was holding and a grin broke out on his face. Her heart softened at the sight and all of her doubts of going for help went away. If she could make him smile like that it was worth it.

All of a sudden he pulled her in for an unexpected kiss. His hands were gripping her shoulders and his lips were firm against hers. It wasn't passionate or sweet nor was it gentle. It was like he was pouring everything he had into that one kiss and she responded with the same amount of love and need that was inside her. He abruptly pulled away and they stared at each other, panting as if seeing one another for the first time. She looked into his blue eyes and was startled when she saw every emotion possible pass through them. Fear, worry, sadness, grief, happiness, love…desire. She shivered as he held her gaze.

"Bloody hell," he said hoarsely. "I love you so fucking much, Hermione." he dropped his forehead against hers. "I know how hard it was for you to agree to get help. But, I'm always going to be here for you first, yeah?" he said.

"Did I ever tell you how lucky I am to have you?" She felt Ron's breath on her lips when he laughed. He shook his head with a smile and closed the gap between them to kiss her. He deepened the kiss and she moaned into his mouth. His arms circled around her waist, bringing their bodies as close as possible. All of a sudden she clutched her stomach and laughed when it gave a loud grumble.

"Sorry," Hermione grimaced. "I did say I haven't eaten much today."

Ron laughed and took her hand leading her out towards the kitchen. "Come on. I'm hungry, too."

"You're always hungry, Ron," Hermione said and they were both laughing as they entered the kitchen.

They stopped short as soon as they opened the door. She was surprised at first to see Harry and Ginny sitting at the table. She had forgotten they had gone into the kitchen earlier. Then her face went red when she saw exactly what they were doing. Ginny was sitting in Harry's lap and they were kissing aggressively. Her hands were in his hair making it stand up, his glasses dangling from her pinky finger. Harry had one hand under Ginny's dress massaging her thigh. His other hand was in her hair. It had come out of its plait and cascaded all over her shoulders and back in a tangled mess.

 _Oh dear_ , Hermione thought, glancing at Ron's shocked face.  _Here it comes. He's going to lose it now._

Much to Hermione's astonishment Ron smirked and cleared his throat in an almost perfect imitation of Umbridge. Hermione hid her snort under her hand and watched as Harry and Ginny jumped up so fast he had to catch her before she fell. They both whipped around to look at Ron and Hermione.

Ginny huffed and said calmly to Harry, "Oh it's just them." She righted herself and smoothed down her dress. Harry on the other hand hastily put his glasses on and looked at Ron with wide eyes.

"Hey, mate…we were just er…" Harry said nervously.

"Oh relax, Harry. I blame this one here," Ron said pointing at his sister. "We all know she's a bad influence on you."

Ginny opened her mouth in shock. "And what exactly is that supposed to mean?" Ginny squeaked at him with her hands on her hips.

Ron rolled his eyes and walked casually to the cupboard and brought down two plates. "I'm only taking the piss, Ginny. Harry knows I'm only joking."He said dismissively with a chuckle. He took out the makings for a sandwich and turned to Harry. "Care for a sandwich?"

"No thanks…," Harry said slowly watching Ron out of the corner of his eye. Then he stretched his arms out and faked a loud yawn. "Oh well, it's late. I should er…get to bed. Night all!" He pecked Ginny on her cheek and pat Hermione's shoulder then walked briskly out the room. Ron just carried on making his and Hermione's sandwiches.

Ginny stammered and turned to Hermione who shrugged her shoulders. Hermione had no idea why Ron was acting so nonchalantly about catching his sister and Harry in a compromising position. Hermione watched as Ginny stalked to the counter where Ron stood and smacked him on the back of his head.

"Oi! What was that for?" Ron yelled rubbing his head. Hermione sat at the table and perched her chin in her hand to watch them argue. She knew their fights were never serious. As she had no siblings of her own she was always fascinated by their sibling rivalries and constant banter. Plus she thoroughly enjoyed watching him get all riled up from the sidelines.

"That was for scaring Harry away! Do you know how long I've been trying to get him to go even that far?" Ginny yelled back.

"Scare? Harry? Are you mad? If anyone scared him away it was you with your…feminine wiles!"

Hermione opened her mouth in amused shock. She watched them both glare at each other for several seconds. Then Ginny cracked up laughing.

"Feminine…wiles? Really, Ron? Where did you even learn a word like that?" She grabbed her sides and bent over trying to catch her breath. "Oh that's good…wiles."

Ron smirked and elbowed her on his way to the table hovering two plates of food. As they started to eat Ginny finally calmed down and sat next to Hermione stealing a piece of ham from Ron's plate. He tried smacking her hand, but she was too fast for him.

"So, Hermione, are you feeling any better?" she asked before popping the ham in her mouth. Hermione took a deep breath before she answered. As much as she adored Ginny she thought her mum made a good point about having some tact. Hermione glanced at Ron who was glaring at Ginny.

"Um…Yes, much better thanks. I agreed to see someone about…what happened. A mind healer perhaps. I…we think it may be stress related," Hermione explained hoping it was enough to squash any more questions.

"Oh well that's good then, right?" Ginny said sincerely. "I mean it's important to get help when you need it. And don't worry I'll tell Harry so you don't have to repeat it." She smiled at Hermione knowingly and squeezed her hand before getting up. Before walking out the kitchen she turned around and said, "And Ron…thanks for…you know. Taking care of her and all that. It's very…sweet. Well good night!" Then she ducked out the door to go upstairs.

"Well there you go. It's official," Ron said grinning at Hermione. "The brat has spoken. I'm…sweet."

Hermione smiled widely back at him. "Well that's old news to me," she said leaning forward on the table and twirling her hair on her finger. She was never any good at flirting and she felt a bit ridiculous, but it seemed to have the desired effect. Ron's face flushed and she saw his eyes drop below her face to her chest. Hermione sat up straighter, pushing her chest out in an attempt to make her small breasts more appealing. She was blushing fiercely at her blatant behavior, but was encouraged by Ron's staring. She jumped back when Ron abruptly stood up with wide eyes.

"I…I'll be right back!" He stumbled out of his seat and took off to the living room and up the stairs. Hermione stared after him in shock.

_What just happened? Was I doing it wrong? Was it too much? After the past two months together I figured he could handle looking at my chest for goodness sake!_

She finally got over her shock and followed Ron's trail through the living room ready to go upstairs and demand an answer. Her foot was on the first step when Ron came barreling down and stopped right in front of her. He was out of breath and put up a finger for her to wait. Hermione tapped her foot waiting impatiently for him to catch his breath. She heard a door click closed faintly upstairs and narrowed her eyes at Ron wondering what was going on. Ron stepped down another step to grab her hand.

"Sorry about that. I had to catch Harry before he went to sleep," he whispered pulling her up the stairs. "Remember when I told you to meet me upstairs tonight? I forgot to tell Harry because well…you know what happened."

Hermione blushed suddenly recalling his earlier invitation. She had forgotten all about it after the commotion and stress of the aftermath of Ron's fall.

"Oh…right. I forgot about that," she said. Ron stopped in front of his door and turned to her with a frown.

"You don't have to come in if you don't want to. I mean I'm not expecting…you know. I just thought we could be alone for a bit, that's all. I feel like I can't even see you without someone else there interrupting."

He looked at her in anticipation and she couldn't help but smile at him. He was so hopeful and she knew there was no way she would turn away from him. Not after that display she put on downstairs. They haven't been truly alone in weeks and she was dying to get her hands on him. She bit her lip and stared at him while she reached around and opened his door. She walked in and sat on his bed. She crossed her legs and leaned back to rest her hands behind her. She gave him what she once saw in a movie called a 'come hither' look. She almost laughed at herself but Ron was staring at her so intently, his eyes hooded with desire. She held her breath as he stepped into the room and closed the door so slowly she jumped when it finally closed with a tiny click. They both laughed nervously. Ron sat next to Hermione on his bed close enough for their thighs to touch. He put his hand on the bed behind her and leaned forward to plant a light kiss on her cheek, making her face burn. She ducked her head and turned to look at his face.

He spoke first. "Would it be ok if I ask you to stay with me tonight? Just to sleep, of course. I think I would sleep better with you next to me," he asked. Hermione almost melted right then and there. She wanted to sleep next to him ever since he told her about his nightmares. She wanted to help him the way he has been helping her, by just being there and holding him.

Hermione licked her lips and leaned in closer. "What about Harry?"

Ron groaned, watching her tongue move around her lips. "I talked to him already. Told him to get lost so he's staying in Ginny's room."

Hermione grinned. "Really? And you don't have a problem with that do you?"

Ron shook his head, his eyes never leaving her mouth. "No… Let's not talk about them, yeah?"

His lips were suddenly on hers trapping her bottom lip between his. His hand gripped her waist and gently pushed her back against the sheets while deepening the kiss. Her dress was hitched all the way up around her waist and she could feel his hardness against her most sensitive area. Tightness coiled inside her chest and started moving lower until it hit and spread across her abdomen with such intensity that a whimpering sound escaped her mouth before she even realized she made it. The reaction was instantaneous as they both felt the electricity course through them. The feeling was different this time as they knew they were completely alone. Hermione felt a freeness that she had never experienced before.

She pulled away from Ron's lips and whipped out her wand, aiming it at the door behind her. She fired off several spells to lock, seal, imperturb and silence the room thus insuring their privacy even more. She threw the wand behind her and grabbed Ron's face roughly in her hands.

"I thought I lost you today," she said trying not to cry again. "I don't ever want to feel like that again. Ever." She ground her hips once against him and gasped when she felt his hands dig into her sides.

"You never will, love. I will slay a hundred dragons if it meant coming back to you. I bloody swear on it." He looked at her hungrily and pulled her hard against him, wrapping his arms all the way around her waist. She shuddered as he took her mouth in his once more kissing her with unrestrained desire. She kissed him back just as fervently until they were both breathing hard and gasping into each other's mouths refusing to let go for air. Ron slid his hands down to cup her bum and Hermione squealed against his lips when he squeezed her roughly through her knickers. Her hips shot up slamming into him and they froze when they realized how close their bodies had suddenly become.

Ron pulled away from her face and they were both panting, breathless. They stared at each other what seemed like a lifetime until Ron moved his hips experimentally against hers just once making her open her mouth in a silent gasp. Ron grinned at her reaction and sat up to remove his shirt with one hand, throwing it on the floor to join her wand. She moaned and bit her lip, sitting up and leaning on her hands to get a better look. She placed a shaking hand on his shoulder and ran it down his chest and over his flat toned abdomen. He was hairless and she counted what must be over one hundred freckles all over his torso. She sat up further to kiss one near his shoulder and felt his hand in her hair sweeping it aside. She kissed another one on his collarbone and felt him kiss her tenderly on her ear. She found a freckle near his heart and placed her lips on it then using her tongue licked it slowly as if it were his actual heart she was claiming territory on. Ron cupped the side of her face with his hand and brought her head up to look at him. She was starting to feel lightheaded, but this time she knew it was for all the right reasons.

Ron, still holding her face, looked down on her. "I love you, Hermione. I know we've said it before and many times since, but…I really really do love you," Through her haze of desire she could feel the sincerity in his voice and the expression on his face made her heart clench inside of her and her stomach flip over. Yes they have told each other many times that they loved one another. The way he said it just then, however, made it so much more special to her. Just like the kiss in the living room had felt different. It was almost overwhelming. She was amazed at how open and unashamed he was with her now. She knew she could never tease him about his emotional range being the size of a teaspoon ever again.

A tear slid down her face as she grabbed his bare shoulders and shook him. "Oh Ron what took us so long?" she said shaking her head and smiling through her tears. "I've loved you for years, but now it's like a whole new kind of love that I never even knew existed. To have you feel the same way is just…illogical," she laughed softly and Ron joined her.

He buried his hands in her hair and said with obvious longing, "I want you so bad, Hermione. Can I…show you?"

Hermione opened her eyes wide not knowing exactly what he meant. Ron shook his head. "No I meant, I mean we don't have to shag. I just want to feel you, all of you. You can stop me anytime you want to."

Hermione felt her chest turn red and heat up then boil over her face. She smiled shyly and nodded at him. "You know I trust you, Ron. With my life. With everything."

Ron smiled and she watched as he suddenly looked nervous. She realized this was a first for both of them and her heart lifted at the knowledge that he had never got this far with Lavender. A surge of confidence coursed through her at that thought. She took the bottom of her dress in both hands and ripped it off quickly before she could change her mind. Ron sat back on his heels gaping at her, not yet looking down at her bare chest. She was very grateful to him for not ogling her first chance he got. She began to tremble and feel nervous when he hadn't said anything for a few agonizing seconds.

_What if he thinks my breasts are too small? Or my hips too narrow? I was never a curvy girl and that never bothered me until now…Why isn't he saying anything?_

When his eyes finally roamed down to the rest of her body she squeezed her eyes shut and bit her lip in apprehension. She felt the bed move and Ron's warm body enveloped her in a soft embrace.

"You're so bloody gorgeous, Hermione," he murmured in her hair.

His hands caressed her back and around to her stomach so tenderly she could have sworn she was made of glass. She was still trembling as he pulled away to give her a gentle kiss on her lips. Both his hands slowly rose to cover her breasts, fitting them perfectly in his palms. She gasped at the new sensation of being touched there. She never knew how sensitive her nipples were before. Ron looked into her eyes and she smiled at him to show him it was ok.

He began moving his hands on her chest, kneading and stroking. "Brilliant," he muttered, staring at his hands as they in amazement.

Hermione's breath came in shallow gasps, sweat popping out on her neck and brow. She licked her lips as his thumbs brushed over her nipples. Her heart nearly leapt out her chest when he bent down to take one in his mouth, sucking gently, then the other.

"Oh god that feels so good," Hermione moaned out loud.

Ron repeated the gesture kissing her breasts full on as if he was kissing her mouth with passion.

"Yes, Ron…oh god."

"Bloody hell, woman. You're gonna kill me," he muttered into her breast.

She gripped his hair with both hands as the tightness in her abdomen recoiled and shot lower. Ron licked the valley between her breasts and started kissing down her belly leaving a wet trail behind him. He gently pushed her back against the sheets as his hands roamed over her breasts again and down to her hips to the edge of her knickers. She arched her back when his tongue dipped into her belly button.

 _How in the world does he know what he's doing?_ Hermione thought her mind buzzing. _Does he even realize how incredible he's making me feel right now?_

She was still unsure of what was coming next and took a deep breath in an effort to maintain some type of control. It was useless at this point. She lost control a long time ago.

Her breath hitched when she felt his tongue drag along the top of her knickers, his fingers hooking themselves into the fabric and pulling down slightly. He kissed one exposed hip bone and looked up, questioning her with his eyes. She licked her lips and gave a quick nod before dropping her head back on the pillow and gripping the sheets next to her sides in her fists.

Ron pulled her knickers down and off her in one swift motion and she felt the air hit her between the legs. She clenched her thighs together reflexively, shutting her eyes. She was so nervous she felt her heart in her throat.

Ron moved up to her side and she opened her eyes.

"Is this alright? Do you want to stop?" He was looking at her with his whole heart and she felt that recognizable tug in her belly that happened every time he looked at her like that. She relaxed her body and grabbed his head bringing it down to hers. They kissed as his hand trailed down her body to cup her between the legs. Her whole body shook as she opened her legs further letting his fingers rub against her. Ron hummed against her mouth as she let out a gasp and a sound somewhere between a squeal and a groan. His fingers moved clumsily as he blindly inserted one finger inside her while moving his thumb over a ball of nerves.

"Oh!" she cried out suddenly as the tension in her lower body started to throb harder and faster as he pumped his finger and circled his thumb faster. His eyes were closed in concentration, but when she shouted out he snapped them open to look at her reaction.

"Don't stop, Ron. Don't…oh right there. Yes! Oh god…" Hermione threw her arms up above her head grabbing the edge of the bed. She clenched her eyes shut as waves of electricity shot from his hand straight through her body. She trapped his hand between her legs and felt her hips rise off the bed.

"Yesss…Ron…Ron," she hissed and groaned. Her entire body tensed as waves of pleasure pounded through her body. Then she suddenly collapsed back down on the bed. She felt Ron take his hand away from her and heard him chuckle. She peered at him through her lashes and saw him looking at his hand in wonder, flexing his fingers. She opened her eyes in shock when he brought them up to his nose and touched a fingertip to his tongue. Then she giggled as if she were drunk. Her body felt like a wet noodle and she felt lightheaded and dizzy.

_I never felt so bloody great in my whole life._

"Are you alright?" Ron said before kissing her lightly on her sweaty forehead.

For once that question didn't bother her. "Yeah, I'm more than alright. Can't you tell?" Hermione said giggling.

Ron smiled widely at her. "Oh yeah. That was fucking brilliant watching you go all crazy like that. Damn sexy," he growled nuzzling her neck. She laughed and gave him a kiss on the lips.

"I love you so much," she said.

"Love you too, beautiful."

Ron bent down to the floor to retrieve her knickers and his shirt and helped her put them on. She was so exhausted she just let him, no longer caring about him seeing her body. Then he grabbed his wand to release the spells on the room, leaving the locking one in place. She turned and snuggled into his chest as he brought the covers up around them.

"Good night, love," Ron said. Hermione was too tired to speak and patted his cheek lazily making him chuckle again. They were both asleep in minutes.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter sadly…

Ron woke up slowly, eyes blinking open to stare at the ceiling and frowned. Rays of light streamed in through the window and streaked across the room announcing the early beginnings of morning. Ron was so used to waking up at odd hours in the night. This was the first time he can remember sleeping all the way until morning. He narrowed his eyes in concentration and raised his eyebrows as he discovered that he could not recall having a single nightmare during the hours he slept. Even though he was wide awake and well rested he knew it was way too early to get up and start the day. He had a reputation to uphold after all.

He sighed and closed his eyes again turning his body away from the offending sun in order to steal a few more minutes of laziness. He froze when his hand bumped something solid next to him on the bed. He quickly propped himself up on his elbow and sighed in relief when he saw Hermione still sleeping next to him. He smiled at this opportunity to openly stare without consequence.

The blanket had been kicked off the bed, hanging halfway to the floor. She was sprawled out on her back, one leg bent at her knee, the other straight out in front of her. His eyes traveled further up and he silently groaned as his eyes reached her white cotton knickers. His trousers tightened significantly as images of Hermione sweating and writhing under his hand assaulted his brain. He shook his head and continued on his voyeuristic journey up her body. She was still wearing Ron's shirt which had ridden up during the night revealing the smooth soft skin of her stomach. One arm was over her head, the other across the bottom of her chest. He licked his lips when he realized he could make out the outline of her nipples through the thin t-shirt.

When he finally got to her face he couldn't help but grin widely. Her unruly curls were fanned out and frizzy behind her on the pillow and over half her face. He listened closely and heard a faint snore and whistle coming from her open mouth and nose.

_Merlin's beard she looks like a fucking angel._

Suddenly she let out a snort and smacked her lips together. Ron didn't know whether to laugh out loud or kiss her senseless.

"No…no butter in beer," Hermione muttered groggily in her sleep.

Ron leaned in closer trying not to laugh as he was now very curious about what she could possibly be dreaming about. Still sleeping, she curled her legs into her body turned to face Ron and smiled.

"More…socks. Mmm…"

She hugged her pillow and buried her face in it. Ron just stared at her transfixed. He never woke up next to her before. They shared a tent of course, but she was either up before him or was coming back inside from being on watch. He felt like he was witnessing something private and his heart clenched at how intimate it felt. She looked so happy and relaxed in slumber. He wished she could look just as peaceful while she was awake.

Ron fell silently back onto the bed to face Hermione, getting as close as possible without waking her up. She shivered and snuggled into his chest, her hair tickling his nose. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her in closer. She sighed and hugged him around his middle. He felt her eyelashes flutter against his bare chest and wondered if she had finally woken up.

"Why is it so bright in here?" he heard her groan, her voice muffled against his bare chest.

He chuckled lightly at her question. "Good morning to you, too," he replied.

Ron smiled as Hermione lifted her upper body off of him supporting herself on the bed with hands on either side of Ron's body. Her frizzy hair was wild around her head and her eyes gazed at him sleepily. Ron couldn't resist the urge to reach out and bury his hands in the mass of brown curls. She looked down at him in confusion.

"Morning? What time is it?" she asked nervously. Ron was in too good a mood to worry. Waking up next to Hermione wearing only his shirt and knickers combined with the experience they had together last night still lingering in his mind was enough to sedate him for weeks.

"Relax, Hermione," he said softly. He stroked her face with the back of his hand. "It's still early. We have some time before anyone wakes up."

"Are you sure we won't get in trouble?" she asked, but he knew from the sound of her voice she already agreed. She titled her head further into his hand and closed her eyes.

"Of course I am," he said trying to sound more certain than he really was.

_Oh hell, I have no idea what the bloody time is right now. But there is no way I'm letting her know that while she's over me like this._

Their eyes connected and he felt like he just swallowed a boulder. Her soft features glowed in the sunlight and the expression in her eyes blew him away.

"You're…brilliant," he said in awe. "I love you. I also love waking up next to you."

A smile broke out on her face. "And I love you," she said smiling warmly.

_Just 10 more minutes and we can sneak out of here and- Oh bloody hell she's doing that biting lip thing that drives me mad…_

A rush of emotions and desire plowed into Ron at that moment and he couldn't hold back anymore. He gripped her waist and hauled her up on top of him so her whole body covered his. She shrieked at the sudden movement and slapped his shoulder.

"Ron, what are you doing?" Hermione hissed. "Oh…" Ron had flipped them over so he was on top relieving some of the tension in his pants.

"Well I'm not baking bloody cookies, am I?" Ron said huskily.

Hermione rolled her eyes at him, but he ignored it and laughed giving her a sweet kiss on the lips. They explored each other's mouths and bodies for a few minutes until Hermione pushed at his shoulders. She was breathing hard and struggled to sit up. Ron scrambled off of her thinking she was having another panic attack and grabbed her shoulders shaking her.

"Hermione, what's the matter? Are you alright?" he whispered loudly.

"Ron, stop it! I'm fine!" Hermione said, her voice bouncing along with her head. She gripped his elbows to still him and looked him in the eyes. He let go abruptly after realizing she was indeed not going to pass out on him.

_Oh thank god,_ he thought feeling relieved _. This woman is going to fucking kill me._

"Sorry, Hermione. You looked out of breath and I thought…sorry," he finished lamely shrugging his shoulders.

She took his hand and smiled at him. "No it's alright. I just thought of something I wanted to talk about and didn't want to get distracted, that's all."

Ron grinned at her and leaned over for another kiss. "I distract you, do I?"

She grinned back at him and shoved him away with her other hand. "Yes, Ron. You do. Which is why you need to stay at least a foot away from me so I can say what I need to say. Can you do that?"

Ron pretended to ponder this request then looked at her with a cheeky grin. "Alright then. But when you're done we get to pick up where we left off…deal?"

She rolled her eyes, but couldn't stop from blushing. "Fine. But not too long. I don't want to go downstairs after everyone else is already at breakfast. There are rules you know."

It was Ron's turn to roll his eyes. "Then get on with it, will you?" he said and faltered at her glare. "I mean…what is it you wanted to talk about?"

"Well," Hermione began with a big smile. He knew that smile. That was the smile she gave him when she wanted something from him. He narrowed his eyes at her, but he knew that whatever she was going to ask he would say yes almost immediately. "I've been thinking of going to Australia to reverse my parents' memories. I need to ask for a portkey from the Ministry, but I was thinking of going…today."

Ron stared blankly at her.  _Well that's not at all what I expected her to say. But what does she want from me? If she expects me to stay here while she goes off to another country she's out of her bloody mind._

He was about to speak when she sat up and kneeled in front of him. She wrapped her arms around him and played with the hair on the back of his neck.

"I was also thinking that you might go with me? I know it's a lot to ask, but I would feel better if you were there while I explain everything to them. They're going to have so many questions and…I don't know how I'm going to deal with it all honestly. I'll have to retell everything we went through…what happened… before Shell Cottage. Will you help me?" She was looking at him with glassy eyes and his heart broke with hers. He thought about her torture at Malfoy Manor and realized this was the first time she brought it up.

"Of course I'll go with you. I'm so sorry I never asked how you were dealing with what happened at –"

"I don't want to talk about that right now," she looked away and cut him off with a wave of her hand. "I just thought you could help fill in the blanks. With them being muggles and all they never understood everything I've been up to let alone this past year. I don't know how they're going to take it all."

_And there it is. If Bellatrix weren't already dead I'd kill that sadistic bitch myself. Now Hermione's suffering and won't even talk about it._

"That's not a problem, you know that. I'll always help you. We'll talk to my dad at breakfast and I'm sure he'll get a portkey right away. But Hermione…," Ron cleared his throat, "remember what we talked about last night? About you going to see someone? Do you think you might still do that?" He held his breath when she slumped down to sit on the bed clearly annoyed.

"Well yes I did promise, didn't I?" she mumbled.

Ron moved to sit beside her and pulled on the hem of his shirt making her look over at him. "Just go one time, yeah? Try it out and see how it goes. If you don't like it then we'll think of something else."

"Yes I suppose I can do that," she said with a sigh and smiled cupping his cheek in her hand. "When did you become so sweet and mature Ronald Weasley?"

Ron exhaled and leaned his forehead against hers. "Around the same time I realized the most beautiful, smartest and infuriating witch was in love with me. I had to make sure you didn't lose interest, didn't I?"

She laughed and Ron swore he saw her eyes sparkle.

_Fuck I'm a goner. Sparkle? Really?_

"If I haven't lost interest all those years you were an immature pain in the arse what makes you think you're any less interesting now?" she whispered against his mouth.

Then she touched her lips against his so light and quick he felt a tiny spark go off somewhere in his brain. As he tried to figure out if what she said was an insult or a compliment she suddenly climbed on top of him making his head hit his pillow.

"Mmm Hermione…you said arse. I love it when you swear," he murmured while she assaulted his earlobe. He reached up and tugged on her hair while placing wet kisses up and down her neck.

"Really?" Hermione whispered in his ear. "Like…bloody hell?" she hissed before biting his ear.

Ron groaned and pulled her hair tighter.

"Or…bollocks?" she said lightly nipping at his shoulder.

He laughed at her and pulled her shirt up caressing her back and sides. She slid down his body and Ron peered down at her as she started kissing his chest. He hissed when her tongue flicked his nipple. He could see her cheeks redden and chuckled at how innocent she looked doing something so sexy. He ran his hands through her long hair watching her through heavy eyes. He was so turned on and he cursed himself for not taking his trousers off before he went to bed. They were seriously cramping his erection and he bit his lip to hold back another groan. She came back up to kiss him full on the lips and pulled away. Looking him straight in his eyes she curled her lips into a grin.

"And what about…fuck?" she said the swear word clearly and pronounced every letter, biting her bottom lip in the beginning and leaving her lips partially open at the end. He never heard such a beautiful thing come out of her mouth.

"Fucking hell that's so fucking hot," he growled and flipped them over so he hovered over her. He hesitated a second looking down at her flushed face then sat up to remove his constricting trousers a fast as he could, his feet getting caught in the trousers before flinging them across the room. Hermione gasped and he realized his erection was tenting his shorts. But he was too turned on to care.

"Sorry those bloody things were cutting off circulation, know what I mean?" he said quickly before dropping down on her between her legs. He heard her gasp again. With only their underwear between them this was the closest they have ever been. The thin material of her knickers and his pants left little to the imagination.

"Is this alright?" Ron whispered, panting. If she said no he sincerely thought he might implode. Hermione bit her lip and instead of answering she wrapped her legs around his waist and slammed him down on top of her. He bucked his hips against hers and he heard her moan loudly when his hardness rubbed right on her center. He did it again and almost came when he watched her open her mouth in a silent gasp, her nails digging into his arms.

"Oh fuck, Hermione. This is too good," Ron moaned and thrust his hips again causing her to throw her head back and cry out.'

"Oh my god!" Her voice was thick and loud. He reached up and put a finger to her lips shushing her. He opened his eyes wide in shock as she took his finger in her mouth and swirled her tongue around it then let it go with a pop.

"Blimey, that was…" he never got to finish his thought as Hermione grabbed him by the neck and pulled him down to her mouth. He kissed her back fervently shoving his shirt up to her armpits and fondling her breasts. She pushed him hard on his chest and flipped him over to his back straddling his waist. He only had a moment to be amazed at her strength before she was kissing him again. He grabbed her hair and pulled her head to the side to kiss and suck on her neck while her hands moved across his chest. She panted into his ear and ground herself into his erection slowly setting a rhythm. Ron slid his hands under her knickers and grabbed her bum pushing her down even harder. She growled into his mouth and they started kissing each other eagerly, tongues dancing and fighting each other. Ron massaged her bum and had his thumbs hooked onto the edge of her knickers about to pull them down over her hips when-

SLAM!

"Oh fucking...what the FUCK?"

Ron jumped up so fast his forehead hit Hermione's nose sending her backwards almost falling off the bed. He recovered in time to catch her and pull her behind him. She held her face as he looked to the door ready to blast whoever it was into next week. Harry stood there looking down and covering Ginny's mouth.

"Would you shut your bloody mouth and bugger off?" Ron hissed at her while covering himself with the blanket. He looked back at Hermione who was already under the blanket trying her best to become invisible.

"I told you the door was locked, Ginny. I told you not to open it," Harry muttered.

Ginny pushed Harry to the side, ignoring him and stalked up to the bed making Ron back up slightly.

_Oh shit._

"Oh excuse me you randy wanker. Mum is awake now, did you know? We risked being seen and came up here so that you two," she flailed her arm between Ron and Hermione's blanket covered form, "wouldn't get caught  _alone_  and to offer a cover story. But if you would rather us leave and tell mum that you both will be down later then we'll just leave you to it, shall we?" She turned on her heel and was ready to walk out the door until Harry closed the door and grabbed her by the shoulders steering her toward the camp bed. She sat down with a huff and crossed her arms across her chest. Harry sat next to her still refusing to look in Ron and Hermione's direction.

"Ok I'm sorry I said anything, alright? You just surprised us is all," Ron said to them, trying to sound aloof while he felt his ears go red in embarrassment.

_I can't believe they walked in on that. Bloody hell, how much did Harry see? I'll burn his fucking eyeballs if he saw any fraction of Hermione's bits._

"Don't worry about it, mate. I didn't see anything…revealing. I swear," Harry said finally looking at him. Then he smirked and let out a snort. Ron picked up his pillow and threw it at him as hard as he could. Harry caught it and put it behind his head leaning against the wall.

"Bloody tosser," Ron muttered.

Hermione finally came out from under the blanket and sat up glaring at Ron. He looked back at her indignantly.

"What are you looking at me like that for? It's those two tosspots over there that came crashing in here with no warning," Ron said.

Hermione shook her head frowning and hopped off the bed angrily searching for her clothes.

"Hermione, you're not fully dressed you know," Ginny said flatly. Then she snorted into her hand and laughed at Hermione's horrified expression.

Ron glared at Ginny and was grateful for Harry having the decency to avert his eyes. Ron got up and went to his dresser to give Hermione a pair of his shorts.

"Oh come on! Do I really need to see you in your pants, Ron? For merlin's sake," Ginny whined and fell back on the bed next to Harry. They both laughed together while Hermione snatched the shorts from Ron and put them on quickly.

"Thanks," she mumbled and sat down on the edge of Ron's bed. Ron chuckled at her attempt to look prim and proper while wearing his clothes. He put on a pair of shorts and grabbed a random shirt off the floor to put on then sat next to Hermione. He grabbed her hand and was relieved when she didn't pull it away.

"Alright you two…look" Hermione said to Harry and Ginny, "I'm sorry you had to walk in on that, but in our defense we did have the door locked. I am, however, thankful that you thought of covering for us. We didn't realize how late it was."

Ginny guffawed, "Clearly."

Harry nudged her and smiled at Hermione. "It's fine, no harm done. I tried to stop her, but you know how Ginny is."

Ginny smacked his arm and laughed. "Oi! I'm sitting right here! Anyway I brought you some clothes, Hermione, to make it look less suspicious. You two can bugger off so she can change and we'll meet you in the kitchen."

Harry jumped off the bed and kissed Ginny quickly. "Sounds like a plan, love. See you later." Ginny smacked his bum on his way to the door making Ron groan and cover his face.

Hermione stood up and pushed Ron out the door behind Harry. "We'll talk more tonight, yeah?" she whispered in his ear from behind. He turned around not caring who was within earshot or who saw him.

"You look downright sexy in my clothes, have I told you?" he said grabbing her face and kissing her hard and quick. He then left the room closing the door behind him before he did something more inappropriate to her in front of his sister and best mate.

After using the loo they went downstairs to the smell of bacon and eggs and sausage and all kinds of delicious breakfast odors his nose could pick out. He knew his mum only cooked breakfast like this when his dad was there to eat with them, which was rare these days.

"Hey dad," Ron said walking into the kitchen. Mr. Weasley was sitting down drinking his tea and reading The Daily Prophet. He put it down and smiled warily at Harry and Ron.

"Good morning, Ron. Harry. What was all that noise we heard from upstairs?"

Ron and Harry looked at each other. Ron sat down and shrugged his shoulders. "Oh that was just Ginny. You know how mental she gets on Monday mornings." He chuckled and cleared his throat. Harry hummed in agreement and sat down across from Ron.

"Ah yes that sounds like our little Ginny. Quite a mouth on that one," Mr. Weasley said with a snicker. Mrs. Weasley huffed and gave them each a plate of food.

"Are the girls coming down for breakfast soon?" she asked after giving them both a kiss on the cheek.

"Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley," Harry said politely. "I'm sure they'll be down any minute. The food looks delicious, by the way." Ron rolled his eyes and felt a sudden urge to smack him over the head.

"Thank you, dear. Now eat up before it gets cold."

Ron looked around the table and got that empty sad feeling again. He glanced back towards the living room wondering what was taking Hermione and Ginny so long. He was about to get up and find out when Ginny came bounding in and flopped down next to Harry followed by Hermione who slid in the bench next to Ron. As soon as he saw her he felt his insides flutter and melt at the same time. They said their good mornings and settled down to eat. He squeezed her hand under the table and she gave him a shy smile. Even after what they just did not even twenty minutes ago she was right back to being normal innocent Hermione.

_Oh but I know better now, don't I? This relationship is going to be fun,_  he thought smiling to himself.

"Mr. Weasley," Hermione spoke up, "I was wondering how difficult it would be to obtain a portkey? I want to try and visit my parents in Australia. Is that possible to do on such short notice?" They all looked over at his father expectantly.

"Well I will have to talk to my contacts at the ministry, but I don't see why it would be a problem. When were you planning on going?"

"Well, we…Ron and I, were planning on going soon. Today, possibly. If we could arrange it. And we would need one for coming back as well, of course." Hermione was shaking next to him and he gripped her hand tighter. She sat up straighter and took a deep breath smiling at him gratefully.

Mrs. Weasley cleared her throat and addressed Hermione. "I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you to do in order to save them. We're all so proud of you, dear. Take all the time you need. Ron will make sure you're alright. Isn't that right?" she looked over at Ron pointedly. He nodded his head vigorously.

"Yeah, we talked about it. We just want to reverse the spell and explain everything to them. I'll be right there with her," Ron said. He looked over at Harry and Ginny who were both smiling at them. Ginny had tears in her eyes and Harry reached over and squeezed Hermione's shoulder.

"And we'll be here when you guys get back. Keep each other safe, yeah?" Harry said looking over at Ron. They nodded at each other and knew that was all that was needed to reassure one another. He loved that about Harry and their unspoken language they've mastered over the years.

"Well I'm off," Mr. Weasley said standing up and collecting his wand and briefcase. "Hermione, I will let you know by owl as soon as I get word on that portkey." With a kiss on Mrs. Weasley's cheek he was out the door and walking to the apparition point beyond the border of the house.

Hermione stood up as well and pulled Ron up with her. "Come on, we should go pack some things for the trip."

Ron reached over and grabbed some bacon from Ginny's plate.

"Oi! Give that back!" she shouted pulling her plate away from him.

"That's for stealing my ham last night!" he yelled while being dragged out the kitchen by Hermione.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I actually wasn't planning on including Australia in this story since I've read it so many times before being done in so many ways, but I don't like leaving loose ends. Next chapter will have Ron and Hermione with her parents in Australia, but I promise I will try and give it a new twist…


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Side note: I spent way too much time on Bing Maps exploring Australia. And now I want to go there. So thank you very much Google and Bing for aiding in my research.
> 
> Harry Potter does not and will never belong to me.

"Hey, can I come in?"

Hermione jumped, dropping the shirt she was meticulously folding onto her bed. She spun around and smiled warmly, relieved to see Harry standing in the doorway, hands in his pockets and a nervous look on his face.

"Of course, Harry," she said. Harry made his way over to her and quietly looked on as she tried refolding the shirt more than once. "I was just going over what we might need since its so last minute and all. I offered to help Ron, but he insisted on doing it himself. Don't tell him, but I've already added some of his things to my list just in case he forgets anything…"

Hermione wasn't sure how long they would be in Australia. Before she wiped her parents' memories she made sure to have a house for them and work continuing as dentists set up for them. It took a lot of glamour, polyjuice, confundus charms and tricky spell work to plan it all out, but she knew it was necessary so that once it was time to reverse the spell it would be as quick and painless as possible.

_Yes, it shouldn't take too long once we get there. Two days to find them and make them remember me again is more than enough time. Explaining the past several years, however, might take a bit more time._

Hermione jumped again when she felt Harry touch her shoulder. She realized she had been staring at the list in front of her and the words were starting to blur together. She shook her head and sighed. Thinking about what she was going to say to her parents will have to wait until later.

"Sorry, "Harry said. "Didn't mean to startle you. It's just that we haven't really talked much lately, you know?"

Hermione nodded. It was true, what he said. They were both so wrapped up in their prospective partners and trying so hard to act normal that real conversations never seemed to fit in. She threw the shirt hastily into her small beaded bag. She was too wound up and distracted to care if anything was organized. She pushed her pile of clothes and books to the side and sat down heavily on the bed.

Harry sat down next to her. "Listen, I know something is going on with you. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you have Ron for support, but…I wanted you to know that I'm here too. After what happened last night, I…I just need to know you're alright."

Their shoulders touched and Hermione relaxed against his arm and dropped her head on his shoulder.

"I don't know what I am anymore, to be honest. One minute I'm happy and laughing, then something will happen or a thought or a memory will cross my mind and I feel so out of myself. Like my head could just twist right off and…it's a little scary sometimes."

She paused to take a deep breath and closed her eyes. Harry wrapped one arm around her back and squeezed her arm wordlessly telling her to continue.

"I'm so…anxious and worried. All the time. More than I let on," she said, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. The words started tumbling out of her faster than she could retract them. "I feel so guilty because they're all suffering so much and here I am going on about my problems. Crying all the time and…fainting. It's not right, Harry. I don't know why I'm so affected by this. We're supposed to be happy, me and Ron. I mean we are, but he shouldn't have to worry about me the way he does. I don't want to be one of those weeping girls who get all clingy and drive him away," she cried into his shoulder making it wet with her tears.

Harry pulled her closer to his side, rubbing her arm soothingly and exhaled though his mouth. "Hermione, I…I'm so sorry for everything. For what you went through at Malfoy Manor," Hermione stiffened and closed her eyes willing the nausea that welled up inside of her to subside. "And for what you did for your parents to spare their lives. It's all so unfair. And as far as Ron goes you do know the bloke worships the air you breathe don't you?" Hermione laughed softly at his attempt to cheer her up. She was happy to feel it working.

"I never wanted any of this to happen, but," Harry continued, "it did." He stopped to chuckle and Hermione pulled away to look at him, bemused. She could not remember the last time Harry talked this much at one time. She found it very touching.

He shook his head and said, "I can't believe I'm saying this, but we did it, yeah? I mean we beat that son of a bitch and I'm glad we lived to tell about it. It's bloody awful we lost so many people we loved and I will keep fighting to make sure those bastard death eaters get what they deserve. That doesn't make me any less relieved that we made it. It's a horrible truth we'll just have to live with I guess." His face was grim for a moment before a slow grin spread across his face making Hermione smiled despite the anxiety building up inside of her. He turned to look at her and her breath caught in her throat at the intense spark of emotions in his eyes.

"What are you smiling at?" she asked, his sudden bright mood infecting her. She pushed his glasses up on his face and they both laughed.

"We're going to live, Hermione! We really are going to be happy. All of us." He grabbed her hands and squeezed them. "We're going to move on from this, I promise. We'll marry those two gingers out there who we love so much and be a real family. Our kids will be family and we will spend every day teaching them how to be happy and have real childhoods. Because that is what we want and what we deserve, dammit."

He finished with a firm nod and Hermione just stared at him in awe. When she first met him all those years ago she never would have imagined where that friendship would lead. Certainly not all the trouble and chaos, but she also never could have predicted that she would get a true brother out of it. Overcome with emotion Hermione suddenly flung herself into Harry, hugging him tight.

"Harry you really are the best, you know that?" she breathed, her chin on his shoulder. "No one blames you for anything and neither should you. Thank you so much…for your lives. You saved us. I mean that with all my heart."

She pulled back and smiled when Harry brushed away her tears. "Hermione it wasn't just me. I never could have done anything without everyone fighting and sacrificing so much…" he said sniffling and quickly wiping his own wet eyes. "I know I don't often say this, but…I love you. Both of you. If anything had happened to either of you I…" he trailed off shaking his head.

Hermione bent over and rested her forehead on his shoulder. "I love you too, you sweet boy," she sighed and laughed softly. She didn't think she would ever see Harry this way and it did something to her then. She could literally feel a piece of her heart being put back into place and she knew things would be much better for them from now on.

_I am so lucky to have the best friends…no family in the world._

"Oi! Hands off my bird there Potter!"

Hermione jumped away from Harry and stood up to stare at Ron from across the room. He was standing in the doorway wearing faded jeans, a white t-shirt, his rucksack and a smirk. His hair was wet and Hermione figured he just got out of the shower. She could smell his soap and the chocolate frog he just shoved in his mouth. As he was chewing he smiled lopsidedly at her, his eyes flicking over her body quickly. She felt a jolt of desire hit her unexpectedly.

_I never wanted to be a chocolate frog a day in my life until right now_ , Hermione thought to herself licking her lips. Ron's smile faltered at her action and they stared at each other silently for a beat.

Ron swallowed and said in a hoarse voice, "Did I interrupt some-oomph!"

Ron was cut off by Hermione who ran and leaped into his arms, hopping up and wrapping her legs around his waist. She planted a firm passionate kiss on his lips which he then deepened with no hesitation. He happily grabbed at her waist hoisting her up and pulling her in closer.

"Oh for…I am still in the room, you know!"Harry said from behind them. When neither Ron nor Hermione answered she heard him get up and whisper beside them, "Just keep it down and…remember you're not alone in this house, yeah? I'm giving you 5 minutes then I'm sending Ginny up here."

Hermione opened her eyes at Ginny's name and let go of Ron's lips with a smack long enough to say breathlessly, "Yes alright. Got it. 5 minutes."

After the door closed they resumed kissing as Ron walked them over to her bed sweeping the rest of her stuff onto the floor with one arm and dumped her unceremoniously on top of the sheets. She stared up at his flushed face and knew hers was no different. She licked her lips tasting chocolate and grinned up at his bewildered face.

"Bloody hell, what's gotten into you?"Ron asked climbing on top of her and nuzzling her neck. "Not that I'm complaining mind you." He slid his lips over her ear and nipped at her lobe making her gasp. "I have to admit doing that in front of Harry was fucking hot."

Hermione slapped her forehead. "Oh god! That's twice now I've ravished you in front of him. He must think I've gone barmy or something…again," she groaned. Ron just laughed as he peeled the strap of her shirt over her shoulder.

"Oh yea…something like that," he chuckled and licked her shoulder then kissing across her collarbone.

She arched her back as his hands went under her shirt to caress her back and stomach. She didn't know what came over her when she jumped on him. She always thought she had more self control than that, but she just felt so happy right then and there is something about Ron that brings the naughtiness right out of her. Just as his hips came into contact with hers she remembered what Harry said about other people in the house. They were breaking the most important rule with Ron's mum just downstairs.

Hermione reigned in as much self control that she could muster and tapped Ron on the shoulder. All that did was made him growl into her chest and bury his face between her breasts. She rolled her eyes and bit her lip.

"Ron!"

"Oh Hermione," he muttered while grinding his hips between her legs. She groaned in pleasure and frustration.

"Ron. Get. Off!" she whispered in his ear. That worked as he snapped his head up and stared at her wide-eyed.

"Why? What happened?" he asked standing up suddenly and turning to the still closed door. Hermione sat up and fixed her shirt and hair. She waited patiently for him to turn back around. He finally looked back at her sheepishly then suddenly became indignant. He glared at her and crossed his arms across his chest.

"Well what do you expect when you jump on me like that? You can't bloody well attack a bloke and expect him not to get handsy. You know what happens to me when you lick and…bite your lip… Like that!" He exclaimed pointing at her bottom lip that was tucked inside her mouth. She let it out with a pout and giggled into her hand. She shrieked as he suddenly pounced on her, tickling her sides and back leaving her breathless.

"Ok! I'm sorry!" she gasped pushing at him and giggling hysterically.

"Really? You're sorry, eh?" he chuckled pulling her shirt up and blowing loud raspberries on her stomach.

"Oh my god! You did not just do that!" she yelled and laughed so hard tears formed in her eyes. She kicked her legs and pushed him off of her, but he held on making them both fall to the floor with a loud crash. The both rolled onto their backs with their heads touching, gasping for air and still laughing lightly. They looked at each other and burst out in another fit of laughter.

This is how his mum, Ginny and Harry found them, on the floor looking like they just been hit with Rictusempra.

Ron and Hermione scrambled to their feet and looked guiltily at Mrs. Weasley. Fortunately she only walked in on them laughing and nothing more so she didn't look too peeved.

"Oh my stars, you two! We thought someone might have been hurt. Hermione, are you alright, dear? You look a bit flushed." Mrs. Weasley looked at her curiously and Hermione quickly swept her long hair in front of her shoulders to hide any tell-tale love bites Ron may have left behind. She shook her head putting on her most innocent face.

"Oh no, Mrs. Weasley. I'm fine. We were just er…laughing at something Ron said. He's quite funny…"she looked at Ron who just shrugged his shoulders and look to the floor.

_Fat load of help you are Mr. Red Ears._

She rolled her eyes at him and smiled sweetly at Mrs. Weasley doing her best to avoid the faces Harry and Ginny were pulling behind Mrs. Weasley's back. Ron let out a snort and quickly recovered, bending down to pick up Hermione's books off the floor and throwing them on the bed.

"Sorry, mum," Ron said with his back turned. Hermione bit the inside of her cheeks to stop from laughing out loud.

"Mrs. Weasley, did you hear from the Ministry yet?" Hermione asked in an attempt to distract from Ron.

"Oh right. A package just came for the both of you. It's downstairs, dear," she said sweetly to Hermione then pointedly glared at Ron's back as she left the room. Harry dragged Ginny away after Mrs. Weasley, but not before grinning and shaking his head at Hermione in mock disappointment. She heard them both snickering as they went down the stairs.

As soon as everyone was out of earshot Hermione rounded on Ron and stomped on his foot.

"Ow! What the-"

"Shh! You'll get us in trouble!" she hissed at him then bent over to pick up the rest of her clothes off the floor. "That was for not even trying to cover. I can't believe she almost caught us. Do you have any idea how embarrassed I am right now?"

Ron shook his foot out and mumbled, "Like it's all my fault. Randy girl attacks me and I get stepped on."

Hermione blushed and walked over to him. "Sorry I stepped on you, ok? Now let's go downstairs and see what your dad sent, alright?"

"Right, whatever," he said lightheartedly and grabbed her hand pulling her out of the room.

"Hermione," he said over his shoulder while they made their way down the stairs, "where do you think we'll be staying if this goes overnight?"

Hermione stopped in her tracks and realized she hadn't thought about that. "Well I suppose we will be staying at my parents' house, of course. I mean by then we will have restored their memories so I don't see why we would go anywhere else."

He stared at her with an expression she couldn't quite make out.

"Why?" she said loudly making him jump. "Don't you think it will work? Or something might go wrong and we won't find them? Oh no…what if I end up giving them brain damage?" Her heart started beating rapidly and she put a hand to her chest. Ron ran up the few stairs between them and enveloped her in a comforting hug.

"I wasn't thinking that, Hermione. I swear! I was only wondering about er…well the uh sleeping arrangements and all that. I promise I was only having dirty thoughts. Nothing about your parents. You're brilliant! I'm sure it will work. Please don't worry."

"I just never thought about anything going wrong and I saw your face and…wait" she pulled back and pinched his side making him yelp. "Dirty thoughts? Is that really all you ever think about?"

He shrugged his shoulders and pecked her on the lips. She sighed and smiled as he turned and led them down the stairs and into the kitchen.

_He's right. It has to work. I've planned it all out to the very last detail. Spellwork and planning are things I know I can do well so there's no need to worry…right?_

Harry and Ginny were in the kitchen standing together at the stove. It looked like Harry was trying to teach her to cook something the muggle way, but by the way Harry was laughing and the way Ginny's face was scrunched up with annoyance it didn't look like it was going too well. Plus all Hermione could smell was burnt eggs.

"Why would you go to the trouble of waiting for the butter to melt and all that when you can just use a cooking spell to make them come out exactly right?" Ginny was saying.

Harry shrugged his shoulders and pulled the pan away from the fire to prevent further burning. "I dunno, I've always made it this way. I get more satisfaction when it comes out right after working at it."

"Well I think it's a load of rubbish," Ginny said shaking her head and picked up the charred block of burnt eggs between her fingers. " _This_  took a lot of work and in no way satisfies me."

"Oh what is that bloody awful smell?" Ron yelled startling both Harry and Ginny.

"Harry is bravely trying to teach me to cook like a muggle. I told him it was useless," Ginny explained while Harry just laughed beside her.

Ginny then put on a wicked grin. She walked up to Ron and waved the offensive smelling piece of food in his face. "Since he's so keen on teaching me how to cook why don't you taste what I made, Ron? It would make me feel like I accomplished something."

She laughed uproariously when Ron covered his mouth and let out a choking sound. The smell was even worse up close.

Hermione took out her wand and made the charred block of eggs and the smell disappear with a pop.

"Bloody hell that was awful. Thanks Hermione," Ron said.

"Yes it was," Hermione agreed with a chuckle.

"Now see that, Harry?" Ginny turned around. "That is called maaaagiiiic," she said slowly.

"Yeah yeah," Harry said with a smile and walked to the back door. "Come on with me outside and have a fly. Is that magical enough for you?"

Ginny turned back to Ron and Hermione and said, "He won't give up, I'm telling you. Next he'll have me washing bloody dishes by hand." She shivered and ran outside after Harry.

Hermione shook her head laughing. Ron was already picking up the package that was on the table with Hermione's name on it. They opened the package together to find a rubber duck and a long red shoestring inside with a note.

_Hermione and Ron,_

_I was able to secure two separate portkeys for your trip to Australia. The rubber duck will transport you to the Australian Ministry of Magic in Sydney at 12:00PM sharp. There you will be able to travel wherever you need to go. The shoestring is an open-ended portkey meaning there is no time or date set as of yet. When you are ready to come home just bring it to the Australian Ministry and into the office of one Mr. Dourling in the Department of Magical Transportation. He has already been notified to be expecting you at any time to bring you back. Please be careful and always keep your wand at the ready._

_Good luck and see you both when you get back!_

_-Arthur Weasley_

Ron, who was reading over Hermione shoulder, grabbed her wrist and turned it around to look at her watch. "Shit, its 11:30! We only have a half hour before that duck thing goes off."

"You're right and I'm not fully packed yet. I don't even know how long we'll be gone. Do you think you have everything you'll need? Let me have a look," she said holding out her hand.

Ron set his rucksack on the table and turned to Hermione. "I told you don't worry. Everything will be fine. I got everything I need," he said to her patiently then smirked. "Hey wait a minute. I'm packed before you? Since when does something like that happen?"

"Oh don't get all proud. I was talking to Harry remember?" she said heading back upstairs. She went into Ginny's room and started throwing things inside her bag. She knew it was unlike to her to be so spontaneous about going to Australia the same day without even organizing her packing, but lately she wasn't feeling up to the task of always being perfect. She guessed Ron's laid back attitude and lack of constraint really was rubbing off on her. She wasn't all that bothered by it, either if she were perfectly honest.

"What were you both talking about anyway?" Ron asked as he sat on the bed watching her double check her bag. Some things never do change, however. "It looked pretty intense."

She stopped and looked at him noticing a trace of jealousy. It was very small, but after years of both of them feeling various forms of jealousy it was easy to pick out. She put her bag down and sat next to Ron.

"It was intense, you're right. We were talking about sadness and loss and regret and all those feelings we buried down and never talked about," she said and turned to Ron who was looking down at his hands. Her heart ached for him as she knew he must be thinking about his brother and everyone they lost just months ago. "But we also talked about how we're meant to be happy now. How we have a future. All of us. He's right, you know. He said we deserve it."

Hermione lifted his chin to make him face her. "He also said he loved us," she whispered and smiled as Ron blushed. "I know you blokes are so touchy with all that mushy stuff, but I thought you would like to know. Don't tell him I told you."

Ron laughed hoarsely and cleared his throat. "Yea thanks. I know we're supposed to move on and live our lives, but sometimes it's just so bloody hard when the simplest things make me want to so spare. Like finding something of Fred's or just eating a meal at the table just isn't the same anymore. You know how I love to eat and it pisses me off that that's ruined now." He shook his head with a grim smile.

Hermione hugged him around the middle and kissed his cheek. "Oh Ron I know it's hard. It's going to be for a while, I suppose. But we'll just have to go with it, you know? For as long as it takes to feel somewhat normal again. You have helped me so much by being so strong. Whatever you need, I'm here, yeah?"

Ron turned and returned the hug, squeezing her tightly and taking a deep breath. "Now who's the lucky one?" he said and kissed her hard on the lips. He stood up and pulled her with him. "Alright enough of all that," he said running his hands through his hair and face. "How much time we got left?"

Hermione looked at her watch and shrieked. "Oh! Five minutes!"

They hurried out the room and downstairs. Mrs. Weasley was in the kitchen placing sandwiches into a bag.

"Oh there you are. I was just about to come get you. I read the note and you better hurry. Here are the portkeys and some food in case you get hungry," Mrs. Weasley gave Hermione the bag and embraced them both at the same time. Hermione smiled at how loving and caring Mrs. Weasley always was towards her. It only made her miss her parents more.

"Thank you so much," Hermione said hugging the woman back just as tightly. "It won't take long I promise."

Mrs. Weasley wiped a tear from her eye and shoved them towards the back door. "Run along now. Don't want that portkey going off inside the wards now."

Ron turned back quickly and gave his mum a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks mum, love you," he said and took Hermione's hand leading her towards the edge of the property.

Hermione smiled up at Ron and heard Mrs. Weasley sniff one more time before going inside and closing the door.

"Oi! Not going to say good-bye to your favorite sister and best mate?" Ginny yelled as she and Harry sped down from the sky on their brooms and landed swiftly in front of them.

"We're in a hurry, Ginny," Ron said irritated then softened at Ginny's hurt expression. "Alright come 'ere you brat."

He grabbed Ginny in a bear hug and lifted her in the air making her squeal. He put her down and clasped Harry's hand while Hermione hugged Ginny then Harry.

"Cheers, mate. Watch out for this one," Ron said ruffling Ginny's hair. She laughed and hit his arm away.

"See you later then," Harry said as he hugged Hermione.

"Bye, Harry," Hermione said.

"Stay out of trouble!" Ginny shouted as they walked away. Hermione waved back and felt the current of magic go through her for a second as they crossed over the security ward surrounding the burrow. She looked again at her watch then took out the rubber duck for them both to hold onto. She knew they were cutting it close. Half a minute later she felt the uncomfortable jolt and pull of the portkey wrenching them from the ground. Since they were going so far the travelling time a bit longer than the time they went to the World Cup fourth year. It must have only lasted several seconds, but it felt like hours until they finally touched down in a dark alley between two very tall buildings.

The first thing that struck her was that it was dark. She looked up and the sky was black.

"Whoa," Ron said looking up after turning in a circle to make sure they were clear of any danger. "What time is it here anyway, Hermione?"

"Well it was noon back at the Burrow, so that means here in Australia it is... 9:00 at night to be exact."

"Wicked. So do you mean to say we traveled to the future then?" Ron laughed at his own joke.

"Yes, Ron. That is exactly what we just did," Hermione said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. She looked up and down the narrow alley, searching. "There it is," she said pointing to a large green dumpster with a faded gold colored logo of a large "M" stamped on the front side.

"Oh," Ron said wrinkling his nose. "We don't have to go in now, do we? I mean they're surely closed and we only need to see that bloke when we're ready to leave, right?"

"Honestly, Ron. It's the visitor's entrance to the Australian Ministry. Don't worry, you won't have to mess your hair or anything," she teased.

"Oi! I was only thinking of you climbing into a dumpster. It's unladylike, it is. I am a gentleman, you know," Ron said in a huff.

Hermione smiled and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips. "A perfect gentleman, you are," she said. "Light your wand for me then." She then rummaged in her bag for the map of Sydney, Australia that she had kept with her since last summer. She finally pulled it out and tapped it with her wand. A red "M" glowed and imprinted itself on the corner of Macquarie Street and Martin Place.

"Brilliant," Ron said over her shoulder, "now we know where we are how do we get where we're going?"

"It's simple, really," Hermione said. "I had already placed a trace on both my parents and charmed the map so that it would lead us to where they are currently living." She tapped the map with her wand again, muttering a spell. A green line zigzagged a short distance across the map glowing until it stopped at a spot on Wigram Road in an area called Glebe. Her mum and dad were living in the house she picked out for them. That meant they were alive and safe.

"Oh thank goodness," she breathed and smiled widely up at Ron. He was looking at her in awe.

"You're amazing, you are," he said and swiftly pecked her nose. "Now, my little genius, how do we get there? Can you apparate even though you've never been?"

"No, you're right. It wouldn't be wise to apparate. The best way will have to be by taxi. It might be difficult at this time, I'm not sure. Let's get onto a main street and see if we can flag one down, yeah?"

She started to walk to the end of the alley and stopped to look back when she noticed Ron wasn't following. He just stood there staring at her looking more confused than she had ever seen him before.

"Oh right," she said distractedly. She took a deep breath and tried her best to be patient. It wasn't his fault he wasn't familiar with the muggle world, but she was starting to get anxious being so close to her parents and now having to stop and explain different modes of transportation and possibly currency. "So a taxi is a type of car service that takes you where you want to go and you pay for it using muggle money, or in our case a credit card," She said quickly and paused as he now looked at her as if she were insane.

"Oh nevermind, let's just go. I'll explain more on the way."

She grabbed his hand and pulled him out onto a bigger sidewalk. She looked around and saw a street sign, Martin Place. Not too many people walking around as it was only a Monday night. She spotted a lit taxi and moved toward the street with her hand raised high and waving. A white car with a lit box on top pulled up and Hermione opened the door. Ron glanced suspiciously at the driver before climbing inside. Hermione got in next to him and noticed his wand in his hand on the seat between them. She gave him a smile and relaxed knowing she would always be safe as long as she was with him. She helped Ron buckle his seatbelt and gave the driver the address. Ten minutes and a lengthy discussion about transportation and how money is transferred from a plastic card with a metal strip later they found themselves stopped on a nice looking street with many homes. She thanked the driver and noticed the nervous look he gave her and Ron before they got out of the taxi. She was careful about mentioning any strange words such as muggle, wizard or galleons, but she was sure their back seat conversation would make any muggle suspicious. She was relieved when he just drove off leaving them on the sidewalk.

"Well here we are, yeah?" Ron asked reaching for her hand and rubbing her wrist with his thumb. "Nice area. So which one is it then?"

Hermione gripped his hand and pointed at the set of two houses that were attached. All the windows were dark as it was now late at night. She supposed they must be in bed by now.

"It's that one on the left, the one with the violets hanging from the balcony. They're my mum's favorite flower…"

She felt a sob bubbling up from her throat and fought it down. She didn't want to have them open the door to a blubbering mess of a girl. She tried to speak again but the words got caught in her throat and a strangled sob escaped instead. Ron moved in front of her and wrapped her up in his body.

"It's going to be alright, Hermione. Remember you're brilliant. If anyone can bring them back you can. Take all the time you need. I'm right here, alright?" he whispered into her hair and she nodded taking a shuddering breath.

_Well there goes that idea out the window. Blubbering mess it is then. No matter. I've waited too long for this. Crying or not I'm going to get them back, finally._

She straightened herself and wiped the tears off her face. "Ok I'm fine now. I've wasted enough time already. I should have had them back weeks ago."

She gripped his hand once more and without looking anywhere but at the blue door in front of her they climbed the steps and she pressed the doorbell. She heard a chime ring throughout the house and saw a light come on in the first floor window. She took her wand out and held her breath as the door opened slowly. A middle aged man with dark brown hair and glasses peeked around the door and looked at her as if she were a stranger. She instantly recognized him as her own father and her heart started beating out of her chest. She felt Ron move closer to her side and he let her squeeze his hand even harder.

Her father opened the door wider and Hermione heard her mother call from behind. "Wendell, honey who is it?"

Hermione started shaking and looked at her father in the eyes. She felt so much pain and longing and relief all at once. It must have showed in her face because he looked at her no longer cautious but worried.

"Miss…are you alright?" he looked over to Ron who was studying Hermione closely and narrowed his eyes. "What is going on? What are you both doing at my home?"

_Just do it already!_  Hermione yelled inside her head.

She had not planned to let them speak before she did the spell. She knew it was going to be difficult to begin with and she knew seeing and hearing them would make it even harder. She didn't plan on it freezing her in shock. As her father questioned Ron Hermione's mother came to stand in the doorway wearing a blue dressing gown and slippers. Her long dark hair was as frizzy as Hermione's and pulled back in a messy bun. Hermione reflexively closed her eyes as lights popped in front of her and drums started beating in her head.

_Oh my god not now! Hold it together at least until you have their memories back!_

She heard Ron talking, but wasn't paying attention. She felt her chest tighten and she forced herself to open her eyes. She glanced over at Ron. He gave her a quick smile and a look telling her to calm down. She nodded once and took a deep breath.

"…are a bit lost," Ron was saying. "I know it's late, but you see she's pregnant and we've been walking for hours…"

Hermione's head snapped to attention and whipped around to Ron's face. Her mind instantly came back to reality. As he continued talking her breath came back to her and she looked quickly to her parents. They seemed to be accepting whatever story Ron was spinning so she decided to go with it. She quickly recovered and tried to look as tired as she could. That wasn't as hard as she was already exhausted both from her mixture of emotions and the sudden time difference they traveled in such a short amount of time.

"Oh dear! Please come inside and have some tea and a bite. You look absolutely parched and exhausted. Poor thing," she heard her mother speaking to her and she nodded numbly not able to speak as she was not sure what will come tumbling out of her mouth. She secretly pocketed her wand and pulled Ron in after her, following her mother to the living room.

"Thank you so much. We're so lucky we found some good hearted people," Ron was saying as they sat down on the love seat. "And you're English, too aren't you. How about that?" he chuckled along with her father. Hermione gazed at Ron thinking how good he was at this. He glanced over at her and gave her a quick wink before turning back to her father. She blushed and stared straight ahead. Her father sat in the chair opposite and smiled at Hermione.

_Now is the right time. Just do it now. Before mum comes back. One at a time remember?_

She smiled back at her father fondly and saw his smile falter a tiny bit. She swore she saw a trace of recognition flicker in his eyes before he smiled back and opened his mouth to speak. That gave her the confidence she needed and before he got any words out she drew her wand quickly pointing it straight at him and spoke the words she had bouncing around in her head and longed to say out loud.

"Inverto Memoria Reparo!"

Ron, who wasn't expecting her to do the spell at that time jumped to his feet as a steady beam of white light hit her father directly in the forehead. She held it there while she muttered the reversal spells. She trusted Ron to keep a look out in case her mother walked in the room at the wrong time.

When she was done she lowered her wand and stood up next to Ron, both staring down at her father holding their collective breath. He sat there with a blank look and finally he blinked rapidly moving his head from side to side just as her mother came in.

"Wendell, what's wrong? What's going on here?"

Ron and Hermione ignored her as they concentrated on her father's reaction. He slowly stood up and walked up to Hermione with a very perplexed expression. She sucked in her breath as he touched her face and she felt Ron stiffen next to her.

"Her-Hermione? What…" he looked to Ron and then back to Hermione then turned around to his wife who was looking at the scene before her, horrified.

"Wendell what the hell is going on?" her voice was shrill with panic as she dropped the tray she was carrying onto a side table and rushed over to her husband's side.

Hermione pointed her wand out in front of her repeating the same words and shot the same white light as she did to her father into her mother's face. Ron, Hermione and her father all stared with baited breath. Hermione knew she would not be able to feel fully relieved until she got both of them back completely. She glanced quickly at her father who was holding his head in his hand with his mouth open in shock.

"Oh my god!" her mother shouted and grabbed her head, staring in shock at Hermione. "Is it really…oh my…oh my girl!" She grabbed Hermione in a fierce hug and she finally allowed herself to let her breath out in a deep sigh and a laugh.

She clung to her mother as they both sobbed uncontrollably. Hermione was saying how much she missed them and her mother was crying and asking one question after another. She then felt her father join in the hug and they all cried together. She never felt so happy and loved until she heard Ron sniff from behind her.

"Oh bloody hell," he muttered and, being the tallest one, joined in hugging them all and kissed the top of Hermione's head.

When they calmed down considerably her mother ran to get a box of tissues and handed them out. Hermione looked over at Ron and they both laughed through their tears.

_We did it. They remember me. I have the Weasleys and now my parents. My family is whole again…my heart is whole again._

"Now," her father finally broke through the tears and silence. "Please tell us what the bloody hell is going on. I feel like I just woke up from an extremely long dream. If I didn't know about your world I would think I  _was_  actually dreaming. But I know better," he said and looked at his daughter. "What did you do to us, honey?"

He spoke gently, but Hermione still felt a pang of guilt go through her chest. She sat down on the long sofa and her parents immediately sat down on either side of her. She reached out her hand for Ron which he held onto and sat on the floor in front of her.

"Don't worry, Hermione," Ron said softly looking into her eyes and smiled. "I'm right here. Just start talking and I'll help out where I can, alright?"

_My god I love this man_ , she thought as she smiled warmly down at his freckled face.

Both her parents were looking between them with thoughtful expressions most likely wondering what the state of their relationship was and the circumstances around it.

She took a deep breath and started talking, starting with Harry and Voldemort and the reason why her other best friend was in danger for so many years. With Ron's help they were able to summarize all of seven years including the battle at Hogwarts and even Fred. She gave Ron a slight shake of the head when they reached Malfoy Manor. There was too much to tell already and she decided to leave out some facts and scenarios for the sake of time and also to prevent her father from having a heart attack.

Many hours and more tea and loo breaks later they all sat around the living room in awed and exhausted silence as her parents soaked it all in. Ron was laid out on his back on the floor in front of them, his head propped up on a pillow while he quietly stroked one finger along her ankle. The movement soothed her and she felt her eyelids start to drop.

"Oh good heavens it's near three in the morning!" her mother suddenly exclaimed. Hermione smiled to herself remembering how excited her mother always got at everything. She really did miss them.

"Oh you're right, mum. I am a bit tired. Could we maybe kip on the sofas for the night? We can talk more tomorrow I'm sure."

"Oh bugger that," her father said waving his hand. "We have an extra room upstairs you can use. It's our office, but I'm sure with your wands and magic you can make some beds, am I right?"

Hermione and Ron laughed nervously at the thought of her parents volunteering a room just for them to share. Ron stood up and shook his hair out of his face and rubbed his eyes.

"Er yea we can do that…right Hermione?" he looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

Hermione remembered what Ron said earlier about his 'dirty thoughts' and felt her cheeks heat up.

"Yes of course, dad. We know lots of magic," she avoided Ron's face and stood up to stretch.

Her mum and dad stood up with them and led Ron and Hermione upstairs to show them the office. They looked on in amazement as Ron transfigured the desk into a small bed. Hermione blushed and quickly transfigured the chair into another bed.

"Wow you were never allowed to do magic at home all these years Hermione. That was brilliant to watch!" her mum exclaimed. "Oh we've missed you so much my precious little girl," she said and hugged Hermione tightly. Then she grabbed Ron into a tight hug. Hermione giggled at Ron's shocked face.

"Thank you Ron for bringing her back to us. For keeping her alive" she sniffed and gave him a kiss on the cheek. She touched Hermione's cheek and left to cry in her room.

Hermione turned to her father and hugged him again. "Good night Daddy. I love you," she whispered. It felt so good to say that again.

"Love you too pumpkin," he released her and shook Ron's hand. "Thank you Ron. We couldn't have asked for a better…friend to our little girl. We'll talk more tomorrow." He winked at him and left the room closing the door behind them.

Ron let out a long breath and turned around quickly changing both beds into one large double bed. He wiggled his eyebrows at her and Hermione laughed softly.

"You're incredible, did you know?" she said before kissing his smiling lips. She then opened her bag pulling out her pajamas. Ron opened his rucksack and groaned out loud. She rolled her eyes once more and dug inside her bag.

"I knew you would forget so I grabbed some of your things before breakfast this morning," she said before throwing his pajama set at his head.

"Aww thanks, love," he yawned.

They both changed, climbing into bed and snuggling against each other with their noses touching. She knew they were both too exhausted to do anything else.

As she saw his eyes close he whispered against her lips, "That was really intense wasn't it?"

She closed her eyes and smiled. Her heart filled once more as she thought back on the past couple of hours. "Yes it sure was. Thank you for being here with me. I never could have done that without you. I love you so much."

He blindly pecked her lips and grinned. "Love you too. Now go to sleep."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So the reason I was blocked was because I was debating on which direction to take the story. I chose to give Hermione a reason to get better by giving her back her parents. My other options were having them either not remember her at all or…they were already dead. It could have gone either way, but I'm happy with my decision. Actually, I'm just a big softie and want to be able to write happier Ron and Hermione scenes, so there you go.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, this chapter has a very strong lemon towards the end so…that is your warning. Might even be considered a grapefruit…
> 
> I don't own Harry Potter. At all.

Ron blinked his eyes open and sat bolt upright looking around the unfamiliar room as he recalled the events of the previous day and night. When he noticed that Hermione wasn't in the bed next to him he grabbed his wand from under his pillow and jumped out of bed to the door. He opened it slowly and peeked out into the hallway. He lowered his wand and leaned against the doorway when he heard Hermione and her mother's muffled voices from downstairs. Even though he couldn't make out any words he couldn't help but smile to himself. He thought back to just a few hours ago and how she had conquered her nerves and pointed her wand at them successfully restoring both of her parents' memories. His heart swelled with pride knowing that this brilliant witch chose to be with him of all people.

For most of his life he always felt like he was on the outside looking in. He didn't get perfect grades like his brother Percy, never as handsome and brilliant like his brother Bill, never as charming and strong as his brother Charlie, his brothers Fred and George were entrepreneurs and inventors. How could he ever live up to all that? Then there were his best friends. The two people he chose to stick with and support and lay down his life for. One was The Bloody Chosen One who just so happened to save the entire wizarding world, then there was the girl who was smarter and cleverer than any known wizard or witch he ever met. So who was he? Did that make him the sidekick? The third wheel? He used to feel like that for so long that he convinced himself that he would never be good enough for someone like Hermione. No matter how hard he loved her he knew for a fact that she would never feel for him anything even remotely close to how he felt about her.

That all changed, however, the second she threw herself in his arms and kissed him so hard that even to this day he involuntarily smiles at the memory. That kiss obliterated every self deprecating thought he had about himself. His insecurities about his self worth felt like they were being sucked out of him the longer her lips stayed attached to his. He didn't want to let go for anything until Harry so rudely interrupted their moment by reminding them of the war going on around them. He could feel Hermione's hesitation to let him go as well and when he looked into her eyes the love she had for him was written all over her face. In that moment he didn't feel like the clueless prat he convinced himself that he was. He was finally awoken to all the signs and signals she had been trying to send him and that he had unknowingly refused to see for so long.

After the war and Fred's death everything got so complicated and they fell into a routine of avoidance and civility that made him want to scream. He was so wrecked and he felt so lost, but wherever he went Hermione always seemed to be just a glance away. Her constant presence was never a bother to him. In fact he found himself seeking her company more often than not. He had a feeling she was doing the same with him although they never spoke of it. They had become silent partners and he found comfort in just sitting with her knowing that she was alive and safe with him.

It wasn't until that night on the sofa when he was able to help her calm down from what he now knew was a panic attack that he was able to comfort and hold her the way he had been longing to for so long. When he thanked her for kissing him he felt like such a tosser, always saying the wrong thing, but Hermione once again proved him wrong when she actually thanked him back. He cringed when he thought about how he literally attacked her and then grinned when he thought about how their next kiss was just perfect and lovely and the actual start of something real and new between them.

He became so lost in the memory of that night and then of the previous night when their physical relationship took another brilliant turn that he didn't notice when Hermione and her mother stopped talking.

"Good morning, Ron," Hermione said brightly from the other side of the door making him jump and grab his chest.

"Blimey, Hermione! Warn a bloke will you?"

"Sorry, I thought you heard me coming up. What are you doing skulking in the doorway anyway? Are you trying to hide something in here?" Hermione laughed and pushed her way into the room pretending to search for something hidden under the bed.

Ron rolled his eyes and closed the door. "No, you cheeky woman. I was…thinking, that's all. You startled me." He sat on the bed and pulled her up off the floor and sat her in his lap as the memories he was just thinking about were still in the forefront of his mind. He was, however, a bit disappointed to see she was fully dressed in jeans and a red striped t-shirt and trainers.

"Really? Thinking about what may I ask?" Hermione asked wrapping her arms around his neck. She moved in closer and gave him a lingering kiss on the lips. He smiled against her mouth and caught her bottom lip between his teeth. Hermione moaned causing Ron to grip her waist possessively.

"About you, of course," Ron said. He buried his face into her neck encasing his head with her long curly mane. He took a deep breath and frowned. Her hair didn't have its usual vanilla smell to it. Instead she smelled of what he assumed was some kind of fruit, strawberries maybe. He suddenly lifted his head and moved her hair off his face with his hands.

"Hey what time did you wake up anyway?" he asked while grabbing her wrist to look at her watch.

_It's almost noon! Wait, isn't it rude to be the last person awake when you're a guest? I'm sure mum must have said something like that once…_

"Honestly, Ron. Don't you have a watch of your own?" she huffed snatching her arm back from him. "I've been awake for hours. I couldn't sleep once the sun came up…Why?"

He pointed his finger at her accusingly. "You let me sleep in. Why did you do that? I would have woken up with you. Now your mum and dad must think I'm a big loafer or something" he whined pushing her off of him and looking around the room for his rucksack. He finally found it on the floor near the door and rifled through it.

"Well excuse me for letting you sleep," she said hotly from behind him. He didn't have to look back to know her hands were on her hips. "I honestly didn't think you would mind this much. What are you looking for anyway?" He ignored her as he continued the fruitless search not wanting to admit that he might have forgotten something else.

Hermione muttered something from behind him then tapped his shoulder making him turn around. "Looking for this?" she said brandishing his toothbrush and waving it in his face.

"Thanks," he grumbled and snatched it from her hand then turned around to open the door. Before he walked out he turned back around and hissed angrily, "Next time try not to make me look like a bloody wanker. I'm trying to make an impression, alright?"

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him and reached into her beaded bag pulling out a small plastic bottle and tossing it over to him. He plucked it from the air and groaned when he read the label.

"Unless you want to smell like strawberries all day I think you should use your own soap. Wouldn't want you making any bad impressions now would we?" Hermione said smugly while crossing her arms in front of her chest. She tapped her foot waiting for his response. He felt his ears go red in embarrassment.

He walked up close to her face and whispered harshly, "Alright fine I am a wanker. Is that you want to hear, Hermione?"

"No, Ron. Of course not," she sighed and hesitated before reaching once more into her bag and reluctantly pulling out a clean pair of his underpants. She blushed furiously and averted her eyes as she handed them to him. "I was hoping you wouldn't forget to pack these, but it looks like you didn't remember much of anything did you?"

He quickly and awkwardly grabbed them from her dangling hand. He looked down at his pile of forgotten items in his arms and all his anger towards her dissipated. He didn't know how she did it, but she always managed to look after everyone else. Everyone, but herself. He threw the pile onto the bed and gently pulled her to him.

"Sorry," he said guiltily and kissed her lightly on her cheek.

Hermione smirked up at him and said, "No one thinks you're a…wanker." She blushed at the swear word and Ron grinned broadly. He was suddenly pulled into another memory of her swearing just the other night while on top of him. He shivered and stepped in closer to her lining their bodies up against each other.

"Well well Hermione Granger I believe that's what? Four swear words in two days? Oh please say fuck again. Please," he pleaded with wide eyes.

She rolled her eyes and smacked his arm. "No. That was a special occasion. A rare and special occasion, Ron." She picked up the pile of his things from the bed and shoved them into his arms.

"Oh come on, Hermione. Just once, please. Just for me, will you?" Ron begged, walking backwards as she pushed him down the hallway towards the bathroom until he found himself in front of a toilet and the door closed in his face. He could hear her still laughing as she made her way downstairs.

After quickly washing and changing into jeans, his favorite Chudley Cannons t-shirt and trainers he bounded down the stairs in search for Hermione. He found her in the kitchen with her mum standing at the island counter making lunch. They both looked up as his stomach grumbled loudly announcing his arrival.

"Good afternoon Mrs. Granger," he said holding his stomach. "Sorry, I missed breakfast since I sort of…slept in," he finished with a pointed look at Hermione as he sat down at the stool across from them and leaned his elbows on the counter. Hermione just smirked at him and rolled her eyes.

"Oh don't worry about that," Hermione's mother said with a wave of her hand as she added tomatoes to a large salad. "It was a long day for the both of you. Given the time difference and with what Hermione tells me of a portkey. Sounds like quite a contraption. And all that excitement last night. It's enough to make anyone exhausted! I wasn't surprised to see Hermione awake at an ungodly hour, however. She always was an early riser. Weren't you, honey?" she nudged her daughter with her elbow.

Hermione looked at her mother lovingly. "Yes that's right, mum. I certainly am," she said quietly.

Her mum pointed a wooden spoon at Ron and said, "And none of this Mrs. Granger business. Call me Luann, alright?"

He smiled widely at Luann and nodded. Then he noticed Hermione start to tear up and sniff as she buttered a slice of bread.

"Oh honey, what's the matter?" Luann cried dropping her spoon into the bowl and pulling Hermione close.

"No-Nothing. I'm just…so…sorry!" Hermione wailed and turned to hug her mum tightly sobbing into her shoulder.

"Oh my goodness, Hermione. You don't know how happy you have made me and your father. Knowing that what you did kept us safe this whole time makes us so proud!" Her mum started crying and Ron just sat back and took in the scene in front of him with a sigh. For once he was glad to see Hermione crying from happiness and not from distress.

"Sorry," Hermione said wiping her tears away with the back of her hand, "I was just overwhelmed for a moment." Then she turned to Ron with wide eyes. "Oh! Ron, I'm alright. I promise it wasn't another-," she stopped and glanced at her mother and Ron realized what she almost made slip. Ron held up his hand and smiled at Hermione.

"Oh I know, Hermione. Don't worry," he said softly. He reached across the island and squeezed her hand. She smiled and turned to her mother who was looking back and forth between Ron and Hermione with a confused look on her face.

"Wasn't another what, Hermione? Is there something I should know? I mean besides the fact that the both of you are obviously together. You are together am I right?" Luann asked gesturing her hands between them. They both nodded and looked at each other silently asking one another how to proceed. He decided to leave it to Hermione to make the decision on how much to share with her parents. Hermione took a deep breath, lowered her head to look down at her hands and started speaking rapidly in a small voice.

"Well, mum, I've been sort of getting these…anxiety attacks and they come on suddenly. At first I wasn't sure what was happening, but I think I'm starting to figure it out. See some…things happened to me this past year. Well for the past several years really, but this year in particular was particularly awful. What I'm trying to say is that I have been having some…issues that have stemmed from certain events that I have yet to talk about and deal with. I…well I suppose I should just start now, right? I mean you should know…" she glanced up at Ron and gave him an apologetic look that confused him. She looked straight into his eyes and set her face determined to get out what she wanted to say. He felt a chill run down his spine at the intense look she gave him. She was speaking to her mother, but still looking at Ron.

"While we were searching for horcruxes we found one in the form of a locket. It affected the three of us very badly, but one of us reacted worse than the rest. You see Ron, he …" He felt like a bucket of freezing cold water had just poured all over him. She was talking about  _that_. How the locket affected  _him_. And how his leaving had affected  _her_.

Luann pulled out a stool and sat down heavily, clasping her hands on the counter and stared at her daughter in concern. "Alright so this…locket made all of you what? Mental? Did it hurt you, honey?"

Ron cleared his throat and Luann turned her head to stare at him. He figured he should be the one to explain since he was the one who ultimately hurt her in the end. He knew that Hermione needed to hear an explanation about what happened from him in order for them to finally move on from it.

"Well," he began, "not exactly hurt as in physically. See these horcruxes had bits of Voldemort's soul inside so it was like they could…think. Or at least make us think things…about ourselves. And other people…" he stared into Hermione's eyes. There was so much hurt behind them and he swallowed looking back down at the counter. "I guess it affected me most of all given my…insecurities I guess. At one point I just couldn't take it any longer and I…I left. I left Harry and Hermione and couldn't find my way back to them for weeks." He looked back up at Hermione trying to communicate all the sincerity and humiliation that he felt through his eyes. She was trembling and gripping the edge of the counter making her knuckles white. Her piercing stare almost made him flinch, but he was determined to once and for all set things right.

"It was the worst thing I have ever done in my entire life," he said never blinking away. He felt moisture prickling at the corners of his eyes, but he ignored it. "I was a complete arse and I am so sorry, Hermione. I never wanted to hurt you like that. I know I told you that I wanted to come back as soon as I left, but you also need to know that I will take it back in a heartbeat." Hermione was staring at him so openly and he could see all the bad memories and torment she went through in his absence right on the surface. Tears finally fell from his eyes and his voice became hoarse. "You never deserved that, Hermione. I could blame the locket, but that would be too easy. I was always so hard on myself and I let it…I  _let_  it take hold of me. I don't know why, but the way I felt when I was wearing it gave me some kind of…sick satisfaction. As if all those barmy thoughts I've always had in the back of my mind were all true. I was finally vindicated and it felt good to know I was right about something for once." He shivered at the memory of wearing that blasted evil thing around his neck and all the negative thoughts that had permeated his mind.

He glanced quickly at Luann. She had a hand over her mouth as she silently listened to him. Tears were running down her face and he didn't think he could feel any more stripped than if he were standing in the kitchen completely starkers.

He looked once more at Hermione who was nodding her head at him and weeping silently. She was taking in shallow breaths then leaned forward to rest her head on her hands on the counter sobbing and hiccuping.

"Oh my word!" Luann shouted when Hermione suddenly dropped to the floor. Ron didn't stop to think as he ran around the island and crouched down to gather her up in his arms holding her tight. She sobbed and panted into his shoulder gripping his shirt, almost ripping it. He rubbed her back firmly and looked over at Luann who was also on her knees behind Hermione with both hands over her face.

"Honey…what is going on? Ron, I don't understand. Why is she like this?" she said through her fingers.

He nodded towards the sink and was relieved when Luann understood and got up quickly to get a glass of water. Ron continued to rub Hermione's back and hold her close.

"Shhh…Hermione, breathe please. It's ok, love. I'm so sorry. I'm so bloody sorry for all of it. I didn't know," he whispered in her hair as he cried softly. "I knew, but I had no idea that was the reason for…why you were like this. Are you afraid I'm going to leave again?" She nodded her head slightly against his shoulder and sobbed even more uncontrollably.

"It's not…normal!" Hermione choked out between sobs. "You're here… but…I could…lose…any second…"

He gripped her tighter and closed his eyes no longer caring that Hermione's mother was standing in front of them while they cried together on her kitchen floor. He felt her start to gasp and sway in his arms and he immediately took a deep breath to regain some control. He was supposed to help her and that wasn't going to happen if he let his emotions take over. Ron tucked her head lower to rest on his chest as he continued to rub her back and make soothing noises.

"Hermione, please try to calm down. Deep breaths remember? Feel me, I'm right here. Everything I just said was true, but…it's not the truth anymore. All those things I felt are in the past. They became the past as soon as I realized you loved me." He felt her breathing become deeper and her sobbing quieted down. He gently pulled her away from him. Her face was pale and her eyes were swollen, but he could see the spark behind her eyes that was missing just moments ago. She looked expectantly up at him and he grabbed the sides of her cheeks.

"I love you, Hermione. You will never feel like that again. I will make damn sure of that. Never again, do you hear me?" He said it with such force that Hermione just whimpered and nodded at him with wide eyes. He felt his heart unclench and couldn't help covering her lips with his in a passion filled kiss that he tried to make seal his promise to her. He felt a tap on his shoulder and jumped when Luann handed him the glass of water. He took it from her and handed it to Hermione who took a tentative sip before giving it back to her mum. Luann stroked Hermione's hair while looking astonished at Ron. Before he could say anything he saw Hermione take a deep shuddering breath and close her eyes for a moment before talking in a raspy voice.

"I…I'm sorry too, for holding this in for so long. I'm sorry you blame yourself when for so long I blame myself for letting you go. I could have stopped you, but I froze. I couldn't move when I saw you leave and when I did it was too late. It hurt so badly without you there. I didn't function properly. I wouldn't eat, sleep…move. Then at Godric's Hollow when Harry and I were attacked by that snake..and later with Bella-"

Luann gasped suddenly. "I'm sorry, mum," Hermione said hastily, "I know there's a lot I left out, but I didn't want to get into all of it just yet. At the time we just went on with it had to move onto the next thing, but now that we've got all this time to just…think I guess it's just sort of hitting me all at once." Ron looked at her sad expression and suddenly felt drained.

"Oh honey," Luann said wrapping her daughter in a hug. "I may not know everything that happened while you were out there hunting down those…things, but honey you have to get help for this anxiety. It will only get worse if you just bottle it up." She gently smoothed her daughter's hair from her face and kissed her forehead. Luann looked at both of them still in awe of what she just witnessed.

"You had to go through so much being so young. I wish we could have been able to shelter you from it. But I know that would have been impossible. I couldn't have asked for two better people to protect my little girl," Luann smiled sweetly at Ron and grabbed him in a fierce hug. He was taken aback for a second, but was warmed by the affection. He saw so much of Hermione in her parents and that only made him love her more. When they let go Luann patted his cheek once and got up off the floor. Ron grinned remembering Hermione doing the exact thing to him so many times.

Hermione blushed and took his hand. She leaned forward and whispered in his ear, "I love you, too. We're ok yeah?"

"We're more than ok I think, don't you?" He squeezed her hand and she nodded before pecking his lips. He helped her up off the floor and the three of them looked at the door where a disorientated Mr. Granger stood holding an umbrella and a newspaper.

"I came home for lunch and…it's raining," he finished lamely staring at each of them. Luann made a whimpering choking sound and ran to hug her husband who returned the gesture with a look of bewilderment towards Ron and Hermione.

"Oh Hugo, it was so scary. And so lovely and heartbreaking and sad and oh come on and have lunch. We'll talk about it while we eat, alright?" she turned back to Ron and Hermione who nodded and sat at the kitchen island to finish making lunch.

While they ate they told Hugo about the locket and Luann filled in with her version of Ron's declaration which made Ron extremely embarrassed especially since Hermione's father kept looking at him over his glasses. He didn't know what to make of it. When they got to Hermione's panic attack he could see her father getting really worried. Eventually Hugo had to go back to work, but not before he held Hermione for a long time whispering things into her ear while she nodded and kissed her father on the cheek.

"I love you too, Daddy. I promise I'll do that. I'll be fine," she said while wiping away fresh tears.

Ron shook his hand as they nodded at each other. Luann walked him out leaving Ron and Hermione in the kitchen alone with plates of half finished sandwiches and salad littering the counter.

"So," Hermione said after a few seconds of silence and stood up to lean her back against the wall, "that was…intense."

Ron got up from his stool and crossed the kitchen to stand close to Hermione, his hands resting lightly on her waist.

"Yeah, but I'm kind of glad it came out. Okay maybe not in front of your mum, but…how are you feeling?" he asked peering into her face with concern as he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. She lightly traced her fingers on his forearms.

"I'm okay I think. I do feel silly for the way I've been these past few months. It's just not like me to act so pathetic and needy so I tried to ignore it. Obviously that didn't work."

"If you were pathetic and needy then what does that make me?" Ron asked. "We needed each other, Hermione and still do. There is nothing wrong with that. I want you to come to me and tell me anything even if you think it makes you seem mental or silly, alright? And I will do the same. Is that a deal?"

"Yes it's a deal," Hermione said then looked serious for a moment and tugged on the ends of his too short sleeves. "We're all grown up now aren't we? When did that happen, Ron?"

"Somewhere around the time we had to fight for our lives. You pick the year," he said and they both laughed at the absurd truth that can only be found humorous after the fact. They had to grow up so fast being the best friends of Harry Potter, but Ron knew that neither of them would take back a single second of it.

Luann came back into the room and Ron stepped back from Hermione blushing.

"I thought I heard laughing in here," Luann said as she started to gather the remnants of lunch from the counter. Ron was happy for the distraction and helped her dispose of it. He didn't mention it could have been done with one flick of a wand. Hermione helped her load the dishwasher as Ron looked on curiously having never seen such a machine before. He quirked an eyebrow at Hermione who just nodded her head indicating that she'll show it to him later.

"Your father and I were talking last night and we decided to return home at the end of the week," Luann said. "He is at the office right now wrapping some things up before we leave. We were hoping you would both stay until we're ready to go back. From what you told us last night we still have the house and our office still up and running so it should be an easy transition, right?"

"Right. Oh wait! We didn't check on the house before we came here!" Hermione exclaimed. "I'm sorry mum I should have thought of that."

"Why on earth would you have to do that?" Luann asked confused.

Hermione glanced at Ron who answered for her. "Well there was always the chance that Deatheaters would come around which is why Hermione modified your memories, but we're not really sure what state they might leave the house in if they even came at all. Plus it's been empty for a long time now. Might be sort of rank don't you think?"

Hermione rolled her eyes at him and rubbed her temple.

"What?" he asked holding up his hands. "It's true, isn't it? I remember the one time I left a sandwich under my bed before I Ieft for Hogwarts one year and when I came back Christmas break well-"

"Mum," Hermione interrupted trying not to smile, "how about we stay here for a few days and go back to the house a day before you and dad. We can fix it up in case there are any…sandwiches left behind?" Ron let out a snort and soon they were all chuckling.

So it was decided that Ron and Hermione would stay at the Grangers in Australia until Thursday evening then they would go ahead of her parents and also to magically transport her parents' belongings with them back to their London home to get it ready for their return. Luann and Hugo would travel by airplane the next day. Ron tried calculating the timing in his head and estimated that the time between them leaving and her parent's return will give them two whole days of being alone. As soon as this thought entered his head he quickly looked at Hermione who was wearing a deep blush across her cheeks. He should have known she would have come up with this fact before he would. He coughed into his hand to try and cover up the impending excitement that was about to burst out of him.

_Two whole days…just us. Blimey I can't even remember the last minute we were completely alone. And In a whole house. Just us. Just us. Holy bloody hell._

"Ron? Did you hear me?" Hermione was saying as she walked over to him pinching his arm. The grin wiped from his face as he yelped rubbing the flesh of his arm.

"Sorry," Hermione said not sounding very apologetic, "but you were just standing there with that goofy grin on your face you didn't even hear my mum leave the room." She smirked at him and raised an eyebrow. "Worked it out, have you?"

He shrugged his shoulders and waved his hand as if it was no big deal. "Sure yeah. Whatever. We'll be busy cleaning and all that anyway. Doesn't matter…" She shoved his shoulder and he laughed grabbing her round her waist pulling her roughly to him.

"You're insufferable. Did you know that?" Hermione muttered before grabbing his face and kissing him hard on his lips. He opened his mouth immediately making the kiss deeper and moving his hands up her back. He pulled away to press his lips on her neck, but before he could taste her she pushed him away both of them panting.

"Not here. My mum is just upstairs." she said between breaths. "They may be easy going, but I don't want to push things,"

Ron stole one kiss on the spot below her ear before growling and pulling away reluctantly. "You're right. Let's stop." He squeezed her hips hard just once making Hermione gasp before letting go completely and taking a step back. He suddenly had an idea and reached forward to grab Hermione's wrist to look at her watch making her roll her eyes at him.

"It's going to be dinner in a few hours. Why don't we get some food and make dinner? I know some spells mum taught me and you can show me how that box machine works," Ron said brightly and pointing.

"It's called an oven. And that," Hermione said stepping close to him once again and patting his cheek, "is a brilliant idea Ronald Weasley."

His face broke into a wide grin at the gesture and gave her a chaste kiss. "Well let's go. I've never been to a muggle market before. It might take a while."

He tugged on her hand pulling her towards the door while she laughed behind him. Hermione grabbed her bag and called up to her mum telling her where they were going. Soon they were out the door walking down the street walking close together holding hands not caring which direction they were going. After a while Hermione finally pulled out her map and searched for a market close by where they can get their supplies. She discreetly did a spell and Ron saw a tiny picture of a fork and spoon pop up not far from where they stood.

_Is there anything she can't do_ , Ron wondered.

The market was as much fun as Ron thought it would be. He felt very much like his father as he expressed to Hermione his wonder over the many ideas muggles had for refrigeration and the checkout counter took longer than usual due to his many questions to both Hermione and the cashier. He knew he was creating a bit of a scene, well a big scene according to Hermione, but he just loved all of it. He laughed heartily when Hermione apologized on his behalf and told the cashier and staring customers that he was recently released from the hospital and this was his first venture into the world after ten years. She bit her lip to hide her smile, but when he tried to see if his hands would make the scanner make that beeping sound she finally had enough.

"I just wanted to see how much I was worth!" he had said indignantly as she pulled him outside by his belt loop.

They laughed all the way back to Hermione's parents' house. As they prepared dinner Hermione showed him how to use the oven and the dishwasher while he taught her a few cooking spells his mum had taught him. He was proud of his attempt at cooking the muggle way. His rice came out a lot better than Ginny's poor eggs turned out. He made a mental note to fully rub her face in it the minute they got home. He smiled as he thought of his and Hermione's home as the Burrow. They were so comfortable together now, having so much fun in the kitchen that it almost felt like they were already living in their own home, possibly married… a few kids perhaps. He shook his head quickly. There was still plenty of time for that, but he felt extremely content with the fact that he was right where he was supposed to be.

Later that night Ron walked into the office turned bedroom and closed the door behind him before slumping against it and letting out a long breath. He looked at Hermione sitting up in bed already in her sleeping clothes of a tank top and shorts. Her hair was piled on top of her head with her wand sticking straight through the curls holding it in place. Ron thought she looked ridiculous and brilliant at the same time. She put the book she was reading down on the floor and smiled brightly up at him.

"Bloody hell what a long day," he said climbing on the bed and flopping down on his back next to Hermione. He reached up and leisurely ran his finger down a lock of hair that had escaped and fell down the center of her back. She shivered and turned her upper body to look back at him.

"Dinner went rather well, right? I mean they loved our cooking. We make a great team, don't we?" she asked while his fingers moved from her back to trail down her arm.

"Your mum certainly thinks so. She practically had us married by the end of the night," he said chuckling. Hermione twisted all the way around to lay on her stomach, her arms crossed on his chest as she gazed at him. He gulped as he looked at her soft features and into her dark brown eyes.

_I don't think I'll ever get used to having her look at me that way. As if I'm the only person in the whole world._

"Don't mind that. My mum is just a sucker for romance. What did my dad say to you while mum and I were in the kitchen?" Hermione asked while absentmindedly tracing circles on his chest.

"Yeah she's our number one fan for sure. Um…" Ron said then looked up at the ceiling thinking back to the conversation he had with Hermione's father after dinner. He had wanted to speak with Ron in private which made Ron sweat like never before. He asked Ron more questions about Hermione's panic attacks and Ron explained to him about her promising to go to a Healer soon. Then her father continued to praise Ron on his protectiveness over his only child and gave Ron his blessing even though Ron never asked for it. He remembered not feeling as embarrassed as he thought he would be when the time came to talk to her father about their relationship.

"He just wanted to make sure you were alright and I assured him you would be. If I had anything to do with it anyway," he said smiling down at her and playing with her small fingers. "It was a good talk. But I have to admit after being monitored by mum every waking moment I'm not used to how trusting your mum and dad are of us in here alone. Are you sure this is alright?" He looked at the door expecting one of them to barge in any second.

Hermione shook her head and said, "No they've always trusted me. Why else would they allow me to spend summers and holidays with a boy and people they barely knew year after year? They were always very liberal parents and I was mature for my age." She shrugged and traced his jaw lightly with her fingers.

Ron felt satisfied with that answer and knew not to question her. If she was alright with the arrangement then so was he. Reaching up he slowly pulled the wand out her hair and was immediately satisfied as her long hair tumbled down around her shoulders and onto his stomach.

"I like your hair down like this," he said as he took two handfuls and fluffed her curls up around her ears letting it drop onto her face. She shook the hair away from her face making it even frizzier like a halo around her head. She giggled softly and bit her lip.

Ron stared at her his eyes traveling all over her face at her eyes, her nose, her lips that were the perfect shade of pink he's ever seen. He was just about to raise his head for a kiss when her fingers moved up his face to his left eyebrow and down to flutter over his eyelashes. He didn't dare move as he felt a shiver run though his entire body. He was amazed that such a simple innocent touch from her could illicit such a response. He closed his eyes and felt her move her body up against his her breath blowing on his cheek. Every part of him that she touched was like tiny bursts of fire erupting on his skin. He held his breath when she bent down to plant soft kisses on both his eyelids.

"Have I ever told you how much I love your eyelashes?" she whispered against his forehead. His eyes still closed he shook his head in response. "So light…and when the sun shines on them they make your eyes so bright." Listening to her voice and feeling her so close without looking at or touching her was having such a profound effect on him. His heart was racing and he felt like every nerve ending in his fingers were screaming at him to make contact, but he resisted.

"And your freckles are so adorable…" His face was pressed against her neck as she slid up further and bent down again. This time to place tiny kisses all across his forehead then cheeks. "I love each…and every…one," she mumbled between each kiss.

He laughed shakily as her hair tickled his face and neck. He could smell the faint smell from earlier and knew he will never look at strawberries the same way again.

"And your ginger hair…," she breathed pulling herself higher hovering over him and burying her face into his hair planting a kiss on the top of head. "So brilliant I can find you anywhere."

He finally opened his eyes. Gravity caused her tank top to fall away from her chest creating a gap and allowing him to see a generous portion of her chest and the tops of her breasts. He couldn't stand keeping still any longer and grabbed her wrists that were on either side of his head. He tugged at them until she no longer had any support holding her up and promptly dropped down on top of him. He didn't trust himself to speak and instead swiftly turned them over so she was under him. She was breathing heavily as he disposed of his shirt and pushed hers up halfway exposing her stomach. He silently palmed the sides of her abdomen with both hands. He looked down to look at his hands as he used his thumbs to massage her belly.

"And your…hands," she whispered and closed her eyes. "I love those most of all," she finished and covered his large hands with her small delicate ones pulling them up until he was cupping her naked breasts. She let go of his hands and pulled her shirt off.

"Blimey, Hermione. You're so…You make me feel so…" he couldn't finish his thought. Not only because every part of his existence including his brain was tuned into what his hands were doing, but he felt like he was on a rollercoaster of emotions all day and in this moment he found he couldn't string together a sentence. He decided it didn't matter and did what he had been dying to do for hours. With his hands still massaging her breasts he angled his head and kissed her hungrily feeling her respond with the same enthusiasm. She raked her nails over his stomach and chest. He shuddered at her touch and kissed his way to her neck sucking and licking his way down her chest all the while pinching and rolling her nipples between his fingers. She groaned and her hands left his body for a few seconds as she grabbed her wand casting locking and silencing spells on the door and around the room.

His lips encased one of her nipples and he rolled his tongue around it. She gripped his hair and neck as he moved his mouth over both breasts. The sounds coming out her mouth turned him on so much that he was almost afraid he would come in his pants right then. His left hand traveled down her body to the front of her knickers and he felt the familiar warmth and moisture just like the other night. He pulled his face away from her chest to look up at her face. Her eyes were closed and both her top and bottom lip were inside of her mouth. She opened her eyes to stare at him when she felt him pull away.

"What? What is it?" she asked impatiently arching her back trying to bring her hips closer to his hand that was hovering just inches away for her. He wanted to touch her again so badly, but he wanted to make sure she was ready for what he wanted to ask. He wasn't sure he would be any good at it since he was severely lacking experience in this area, but he had to make sure she was alright with it before he went any further.

He shook his head and said, "Nothing is wrong, love. I…just wanted to ask you something."

She dropped her pelvis down onto the bed and looked at him in frustration. "You want to ask me something? Now?" She propped herself up on her elbows and talked slowly. "Ron you don't have to ask anything. Just…you know…touch me. Please."

_Bloody hell, the way she said that was fucking hot. Okay get it together. Be a gentleman and just ask her._

"Hermione I want to- I mean can I try to put my mouth on you…down there?" he cringed inwardly at how juvenile and inexperienced he sounded. He wanted to sound masculine and sexy and instead he felt like some randy hormonal teenager. He was fully aware that he was just that, but it was so much more with her and he didn't want to come across that way.

Hermione flopped down on the bed and Ron groaned inwardly watching her breasts bounce. She threw her arms up over her head and laughed. "Oh my god Ron you are so cute," she said.

"Cute?  _Cute_? Hermione blokes are not supposed to be…cute in these situations," he scoffed momentarily set back from his goal by what he felt was a puncture in his ego.

She sat up quickly and rubbed his arms and shaking her head. "Oh Ron no. I'm sorry. I just wasn't expecting you to ask me that of all things. It was…sweet of you. It was incredibly flattering and kind of you. You know girls find those very excellent qualities in a man," she said pressing her breasts against his chest. His arms found their way around her waist and he ran his hands up and down her back as she whispered in his ear, "especially those who are most definitely going to put their mouth on them…down there."

He gulped audibly as she pulled away and slowly lay back down on the bed. He watched as she hooked her thumbs into her shorts and knickers and with a red face and chest she pulled them down her legs and throwing them on the floor. There was nothing he could do but stare down at Hermione's naked body. He licked his lips and saw her tremble under his gaze.

"I love you," he whispered as he stretched covering her body from head to toe with his. He cupped her face and kissed her deeply until they were both breathless. "I want to make you feel as beautiful as I think you are."

"I love you, too. You're beautiful, Ron," Hermione said stroking his chin then she smiled widely. "Sorry I mean you're very…masculine and strong and-"

"Whatever," Ron muttered laughing. He didn't care what she called him anymore. The look in her eyes and the feel of her body underneath his was enough to spur him on.

He pressed his lips to hers in a sweltering kiss before moving his mouth lower to her chin then between her breasts. His hands were roaming over her entire body trying to touch every part of her skin that he could reach. He wanted to memorize every bump and crevice that made up Hermione. He relished in the fact that he is the only one who will ever see and touch her this way. That thought made him moan against her belly as he placed wet kisses there while his hands rubbed down her thighs and under her knees. He shifted his body down so that his head was level with her parted legs. His face was now at his final destination and he took a shaky breath as he was suddenly hit with the knowledge that he had no idea what the hell he was doing. He glanced up at Hermione who was peering down at his head between her legs with curiosity written all over her face. He became even more nervous and hesitated. He should have known her brilliant mind wouldn't give up the chance to study something new. She smiled sweetly at him and reached down to run her hands through his hair making his heart swell. He could see her shaking with anticipation and felt better that she was as nervous as he was.

He touched her with his finger sliding it down the middle of her slick folds. She hissed and threw her head back on the pillow.

_Well that worked out perfectly,_ he thought _. At least she's not studying me like a damn book._

Feeling more confident he repeated the movement adding another finger and watched in awe as he entered them inside of her up to his knuckles. He remembered doing this to her before, but watching himself do it was a whole new experience into itself. Her whole body seemed to wriggle and squirm as he pumped his fingers in and out of her slowly. He glanced back up at her again and when he saw her bite her lip and grab her breasts he didn't think he could get any harder than he already was.

Feeling bold he dipped his head down and followed the trail of his fingers with his tongue.

"Oh my god!" Hermione cried out suddenly sitting up. He withdrew his fingers from her and looked at her with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry! Wait what?" He was so confused and his mind was having a hard time focusing.

"Oh sorry I didn't expect that," she said laying back down and gripping her stomach. "Keep going," she said breathing hard and pushing his shoulder down.

He grinned down at her. "Did you like that then?" he asked cheekily.

She rolled her eyes at him and let out a loud moan. "Please Ron," she pleaded.

He didn't have to be told twice and swiftly dipped his head down once more feeling a surge of confidence and renewed energy. Even though he was going in blindly he made sure to pay attention to Hermione's body and the sounds coming from her mouth to figure out what he was doing right, when to stop and move somewhere else. It also helped that Hermione would whisper things like "to the left" and "stay right there" and "not yet". He wasn't sure she was aware of what she was doing, but he was extremely grateful for it. After what felt like an hour, but must have been several minutes he heard her whimper and grip his hair hard in her hands. He was so turned on he didn't care if she ripped out every hair on his head.

"Yes right there," she groaned loudly. "Yes oh god. Stay right there. Don't move. Keep doing that. Don't stop. Oh god don't stop. Don't. Stop." He didn't dare stop sucking her and moving his fingers rapidly. He kept up a rhythm until he felt her body go rigid. She was silent but he kept it up. Not that he could move even if he wanted to as her thighs had trapped his head between her legs and her hands had pressed his face firmly against her body. Her entire body started shaking and she let out sounds from small whimpers to deep moans and loud screams. The harder he sucked the more she screamed out. Just when he thought he would pass out from lack of oxygen she finally collapsed onto the bed and let go of his hair. Her legs released him and he sat back on his heels grabbing his knees and panting trying to catch his breath.

He was exhausted and sweating and he could smell her on his face. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and looked at Hermione's limp body sprawled out on the bed. Ron froze and just stared at her. A smile was etched on her face and her hands were drawing lazy circles over her belly and chest. Every few seconds her body would convulse making her snicker quietly. She looked as if she were dreaming or was very very drunk. He smiled slowly feeling slightly arrogant that he was the cause of this dream like state she was in. He dropped to his hands and knees and crawled over to her balancing himself over her sweaty body. He laughed lightly when she opened her eyes halfway and stared at him with a wide smile.

"Are you alright?" he chuckled down at her.

"No, I'm not. You're too far away," she said in a raspy voice. He figured she must have lost some of it while screaming. She pulled him down on top of her and they both hissed at how close their bodies were. "That's much better," she mumbled against his lips.

He moved them so they lay on their sides facing each other. Hermione draped one leg over his thigh bringing him closer to her. They kissed slowly for a long time just enjoying the feel of the other's lips each both tired and spent. Not wanting to break the kiss Ron reached blindly around for the blanket and covered them. They snuggled down into the bed and he finally broke the kiss to use his deluminator to extinguish the lights.

"How did you know how to do  _that_?" Hermione's voice whispered in the darkness.

Ron felt for her still naked body and pulled her in close again. "I didn't," he said simply and shrugged his shoulders. "I reckon the detailed step by step instructions you yelled out were sort of a help."

He heard her gasp and her muffled voice came through her fingers. "Did I really? Oh my god how embarrassing," she moaned.

He snorted and kissed her nose. "Don't feel like that. It was a bloody useful. For once your bossiness came in handy." He laughed out loud as she smacked his shoulder.

"Well fine. I'm glad to help. It  _was_  bloody brilliant," she said quietly. He squeezed her waist and pulled her roughly to him. He felt her breasts squashed against his chest and growled into her neck.

"Love it when you swear Hermione."

"Whatever," she murmured with a smile and burrowed her head into his neck. "Love you," he heard her whisper before she yawned and her soft snores filled the room.

"Love you," he said out loud before kissing her temple and drifting off to sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

"Pstt! Hermione!" Ron whispered from across the room. "Look at this."

Hermione stared at him blankly and said in a flat tone, "There's no one else here, remember? Why on Earth are you whispering?" She then noticed a book in his hands that he was regarding with a mixture of hilarity and disgust. "What is that?" she asked, her curiosity was peaked as she craned her neck to see the cover from where she sat.

They had converted their makeshift bed back into the desk and chair and were put in charge of packing her parents' office. It was Wednesday afternoon which meant they were leaving the next evening for her parents' London home. Luann and Hugo were out making arrangements and typing up loose ends in order to make Wendell and Monica disappear from Australia. Since they were leaving so soon and had a house waiting for them they were only taking their personal belongings which consisted mostly of clothing, books and important papers.

Hermione was sitting at the desk going through the drawers and cabinets organizing everything she found and placing them in various bins around her. She loved her parents dearly, but she often wondered where she got her neatness from because surely one or both of them never heard of labeling or filing before.

Ron grinned at her from where he stood in front of the wall covered in bookshelves and held up his hand. "No wait, don't move. Let me read from it first, alright?" he said almost unable to contain his laughter.

She sighed at the piles around her and, resisting the urge to tell Ron to stop fooling around and get those books packed, leaned her back against the chair crossing her arms. She couldn't help smiling at Ron's wide grin that lit up his entire face. Although she won't always admit it she loved how boyish and immature he was at times.

"Alright, I'm listening. What is so funny that we had to stop everything just so you can have a laugh?" Hermione asked trying unsuccessfully to suppress her own grin.

Ron cleared his throat and held up one hand and read aloud dramatically. As he spoke she closed her eyes and inwardly groaned knowing exactly which book he was holding having read it once or twice herself, albeit shamefully. The excerpt he chose to read was now having a new effect on her.

"Let's see…oh here's something good. 'Desire exploded in waves, curling in her stomach-' sounds like a gas problem if you ask me,' Ron interrupted himself chuckling at his own joke before continuing to read the passage "'wrapping around her heart causing her to crave so much more-' Wow they're really laying it on thick aren't they? Er…Hermione?"

"Yes! What?" Hermione said as she jerked her eyes open and focused on Ron who was peering at her in confusion.

"Did you fall asleep just now? I thought you loved books, Hermione," Ron teased. "I never thought you would find one so boring especially one with a cover like  _this_."

He held up the book and she averted her eyes blushing madly. The cover had a very naked man and a barely dressed woman with a flowing dress, both bodies wrapped around each other with the title Body Heat typed across in big bold red letters. When she was 14 she found this book in her mum's closet and, being the curious reader that she was, had picked it up and read it. To say she was shocked was an understatement. That book will forever be imprinted in her mind as it opened up a whole new world of naughty daydreams she will never forget.

"No I wasn't sleeping. I was just listening. It is a rather silly looking book, isn't it?" she asked nervously.

Ron closed the book and looked at her thoughtfully. He rubbed his chin with one hand and darted his tongue out tracing his lips. All former thoughts were forgotten in that one action. She licked her lips subconsciously as she was bombarded with the memory of last night when those same lips and that same tongue were on her most private areas, trapped between her legs as she pulled on his hair-

"Are you blushing?" Ron suddenly said loudly. He laughed when she looked down at the desk and pretended to stack a pile of papers thoroughly ruining the arrangement of past bills and dentistry invoices she had just organized. She didn't know why she was suddenly so embarrassed. She certainly wasn't last night.

Ron threw the book unceremoniously into the box at his feet and sauntered up to Hermione stopping right in front of the desk. "So Hermione," he said leaning in close his hands flat on top of the papers that were strewn across it, "have you read that book before? Is this one of your little dirty secrets that I'm just finding out about?"

_Oh why did he always choose the worst moments to be insightful and…so damn close?_

"Er no of course not," she said not looking at him in the eyes and continued to stack random papers and place them into the closest bin. When he continued to taunt her with his unrelenting stare Hermione gave in and rolled her eyes. She stood up abruptly and placed her own hands on the desk staring him in his eyes. "Alright, fine. I did read it. I'm not ashamed to say that I read...trashy novels on occasion. I don't always just read text books you know," she hissed and glared at him when all he did was smirk and raise his eyebrows.

Despite her efforts to appear indignant she felt her resolve weaken as her body took over her mind. Being this close to Ron always had that affect on her, but given their recent physical activities she was finding it more difficult each day to hold back and not throw herself on him, especially in front of her parents. She didn't tell Ron, but she was a bit surprised when they took so well to him and how comfortable he was around them. The way he talked to her dad with confidence and ease and the way he treated her mum with the utmost respect and chivalry made him even more desirable. She had to literally stop herself from having her way with him right there on the sofa when her dad was showing him the inner workings of a lamp or in the kitchen as he helped her mum with the dishwasher or in the garden when he offered just that morning to throw the ceramic gnome they had as decoration over the fence.

"Oh never mind," Hermione said flopping back into the chair in a huff. She was slightly bothered by the fact that after so many years of winning every argument with Ron he now had the upper hand just because her brain was reduced to pudding in his presence. It wasn't fair and she vowed to try harder to win the next row no matter how ridiculous and irrational the subject was.

"Oh come on, Hermione. Is it that bad? Maybe you should take it with you to Hogwarts. Without me there you might get lonely and need something to what was it...wrap around your heart or something about a craving?"

Hermione glared up at him and bit the insides of her cheeks. She would not give him the satisfaction of letting him know he got to her. "Very funny, Ron. And what will you use? We all know you don't read," she said pointing her chin in the air.

Ron narrowed his eyes at her and backed up to the box reaching down to grab the book again. "I would read more if I knew there are nasty bits in it. Something tells me this one will do just fine," he said opening it once more skimming the pages.

"Oh no you don't! Give it here," Hermione said blushing furiously and stalked over to him yanking the book out of his hand. She knew if he read any more she wouldn't be able to control herself.

"Oi! I was just about to read something about heaving bosoms and sweaty loins!" Ron shouted and lunged for the book. He grabbed Hermione around the waist and reached around her back where she was attempting to hide it. Her breath caught in her throat at the sudden contact and she accidentally dropped the book to the floor with a thud.

"Aha," Ron declared bending down to retrieve it from the floor his hand still lingering on her lower back. Hermione felt her own 'bosoms' heaving and promptly kicked the book across the floor. Hermione felt a rush of energy fill her body that seemed to come from out of nowhere as she pulled Ron up by his collar until he was standing. She gave herself a reprieve from self control and pushed him against the bookshelf. A book fell from a high shelf and Ron dodged to miss it from crashing on his head.

"Bloody hell, woman!" he exclaimed holding the top of his head and staring at her in disbelief. "Are you mad?"

She stood on her toes and using her tongue she licked a trail from his chin along his jaw to his ear.

"Shut up and kiss me," Hermione whispered as she moved in even closer until their pelvises were aligned. She knew it was an overused and cliché thing to say, but she figured Ron wouldn't know that growing up as a wizard and all.

Hermione felt a certain amount of womanly power as Ron stiffened against her and let out a deep breath blowing it on her neck making her giggle. His hands came up to frame her face making her look at him. She saw the desire written in his eyes and knew her face was as red as his.

"Gladly," he muttered before crushing his lips against hers.

She moaned at the impact of the kiss and opened her mouth eagerly allowing the kiss to become deeper. Her hands slid up his arms and around his neck holding his head firmly in place as they attacked each other's lips. Their tongues were thrashing about into each other's mouths, lips sucking and teeth biting. Hermione heard Ron let out a low growl before grabbing her bum hard making her cotton shorts ride up between her arse and pulling her closer. She felt his hard length through his running shorts and reached around to grab his bum in retaliation.

"You feel so good, Hermione," Ron mumbled before clasping his lips on her neck. She was wearing a light pink top with buttons down the front. She didn't know how Ron did it, but he managed to loosen the top two buttons revealing the top of her chest beaded with sweat. He licked and kissed her chest nudging the shirt to the side with his chin. She threw her head back and pushed him against the bookshelf once again using her hips. Another book fell this time luckily missing her head by an inch. She quickly withdrew her wand and cast a protective shield around them.

Their mouths found each other again and they resumed their hungry kisses and roaming hands. Ron turned them around and slammed her into bookshelf. She cried out in surprise watching more books fall this time bouncing harmlessly on the bubble she created.

"Brilliant," Ron said looking down at the discarded books lying on the floor around them.

Hermione grinned and pulled him by the front of his shirt. "Do you want to know another dirty little secret of mine?" she asked and bit her lip. Ron nodded his head his heavy lidded eyes on her mouth. "I've always daydreamed about being with you like this…against a bookshelf. There was always something about the library that turned me on. I suppose this is close enough."

Ron shook his head and laughed. "Only you, Hermione. That's why I love you," he said and gave her a soft kiss.

"You have no idea what you do to me," Hermione breathed out her heart beating out of her chest.

They kissed again and as it became more passionate Hermione reached her arms up over her head and gripped the edge of a shelf. Ron pinned her back flush against the bookshelf and ran his hands leisurely up her arms and down her sides. She gasped when he used one hand to unbutton the rest of her shirt and sucked her nipple through her cotton bra. His hands then travelled inside her shorts massaging her bum through her knickers. He ground his hips hard against hers making her whimper as she could feel the rigidness of his erection slide between her legs.

Her knuckles were starting to turn white on the bookshelf as he moved again causing tiny fireworks to flash in front of her eyes.

_Is every time I'm with him going to be like this? There's so much energy between us this can't be normal can it?_

"Oh!" she cried out suddenly when she felt his hands kneading her bare arse. She bucked her hips hard against his making him groan into her neck.

"I want you so fucking bad you have no bloody idea," Ron grunted against her mouth between kisses and setting a slow rhythm to his hips. It felt painfully brilliant, but Hermione couldn't help but feel unsatisfied.

"I think…I have an idea," Hermione panted and arched her back. With her brain buzzing and lust clouding her judgment she suddenly pushed him away and hastily shoved her shorts and knickers off standing in front of Ron wearing only her bra that was wet from his mouth and an opened shirt that was hanging loosely on her shoulders. Without further hesitation she grabbed the top of his shorts and pulled them off along with his pants down to the floor to pool around his ankles. She sucked in a breath when she finally saw his erection jutted out from his body. She had never seen one before and suddenly felt very nervous. She was acting on pure impulse and while the adrenaline from moments ago was still pumping through her veins she felt her inexperience creeping up on her.

Ron looked shock for a second then stepped out of his clothes and trainers almost tripping over them in his haste and pulled his shirt off with one hand. He reached out and tugged her shirt off her shoulders letting it fall to the floor with the other clothes and books. She finally looked up at his face and saw as much want and longing in his eyes as she knew were in hers.

"Hermione, what-"

Before he could finish she flung her arms around his neck and pressed her lips on his, probing his mouth with her tongue. She wasn't sure what she wanted. All she knew was that she needed to feel the heat from his body up against hers and she wasn't going to get it with things like shirts and pants in the way. She pulled back and, breathing heavily through her mouth reached around and unsnapped her bra throwing it to the floor.

They stood there both breathing heavy and stared at each other's nude bodies. She was sweaty and red all over and she knew her hair had to be a frizzy mess around her head. She tried not to think about her small breasts and wide hips as she watched him ogle her, his eyes skimming up and down her body from her small toes to the top of her untamed hair. Hermione trembled slightly under his gaze and knew it wasn't from a chill in the room since the temperature seemed to have risen significantly in the last few seconds. She shifted from one foot to the other staring back at him in awe. It only took one second to take him in and really appreciate the man he had grown into.

Ron was not as thin as he used to be his shoulders having gotten broader over the past several months. He looked stronger and healthier than she has seen him all year. She also noticed as she looked lower that there were freckles along his upper thighs and ginger hair sprouting from his crotch. Hermione tentatively reached out one hand and touched him with one finger dragging it along its hard length. Ron drew in a sharp breath and braced one hand on the shelf next to her head. She looked up to gauge his reaction. He was staring at her so intensely that it made her shiver.

"It's alright. You can…touch it. Please," Ron said between clenched teeth then gasped as she wrapped her whole small hand around him.

"It's so…warm," she observed curiously and slid her hand up to cover the tip. When she did this Ron groaned loudly and pulled her into him by her waist kissing her fervently. The buzzing in her head grew louder and her body took over. She pulled back and quickly grabbed onto his shoulders hoisting herself up between him and the bookshelf so Ron could hold her up as she wrapped her legs tightly around his waist. With clothes no longer in the way they both gasped loudly when their private met in the middle, his erection nestled between her folds. Her eyes fluttered closed as she felt the tip poking at her opening.

"Hermione, love…are you sure? Right now?" Ron breathed into her mouth. All she could do was nod her head and bite her lip. Apparently that was all the encouragement he needed because in the next second he had his wand out and was muttering a protection charm over his lower body. He threw the wand aside and she then felt his hand between her legs. Before she could wonder how he even knew that spell she felt something thick and hard bumping into her trying to find an entrance. It was quiet in the room other than Ron swearing under his breath and muttering apologies with each clumsy attempt. Hermione bit her lip harder willing him to hurry up and get it in before she lost her nerve. Finally he grunted loudly as she felt him push into her with one hard thrust.

"Fucking hell!" he shouted and grabbed her in a tight hug trapping her between him and the bookshelf. She gasped at the sudden invasion and squeezed her eyes shut against the sharp pain that wracked her body.

"Oh shit. Are you ok?" Ron asked studying her face and smoothing her hair back away from her face. She forced herself to open her eyes and look at him. He looked so worried. The pain she felt was starting to go away so she gave him a small smile and nodded. "It's fine. Just…take it slow," she said quietly.

Ron, with his hands now clutching her arse to hold her up, closed his eyes and sucked his lips into his mouth in concentration as he set a slow and burning pace. Just as she was getting used to the feeling of him inside of her he would pull back too far and fall out having to readjust himself to find her entrance again. She was starting to get frustrated when Ron, still holding her in place spun them around and dropped them to the floor banging elbows into books and scattering clothes in every direction.

"Ow!" Hermione muttered rubbing her elbow then her head, removing a book from behind it.

"Sorry," Ron said sheepishly and used both hands to sweep the rest of the debris out of the way.

"No worries," she said hurriedly and pulled him down on top of her. She didn't want to stop to give the nervousness inside of her a chance to come out.

The adrenaline and excitement from moments ago came rushing back as Ron realigned his body with hers pushing into her even deeper. Hermione sucked in her breath and her eyes rolled back as the feeling of being full took on a whole new meaning.

"You're so bloody…soft and tight," Ron panted into her hair as he continued to slide in and out of her, first slow and gradually speeding up until she could feel herself being literally pounded into the floor.

She held onto his shoulders in a vice grip and gasped each time he entered her, her entire body humming with pleasure and pain.

"Ron…my back hurts," Hermione found herself saying out loud. She wished she had something sexy and appropriate to say in the moment, but she couldn't think of anything except how her back and bum were being rubbed into floor. When Ron lifted his head and chest to look at her she smirked at his puzzled face. "Sorry, but you're going to make a hole in the floor the way we're going."

Ron opened his eyes in shock and they both laughed nervously not sure what to do next.

"Alright, here," Ron said and flipped them over so Hermione was on top of him. She sat up straight arching her back to stretch out her sore muscles. He was still buried deep inside her and in this new position an immense feeling of power took over her. She tilted her head down and grinned down at Ron's shocked face.

"You're fucking gorgeous, love," Ron said as he slid his hands down from her shoulders, over her breasts and gripped her waist, his thumbs rubbing circles over her belly. Hermione blushed like mad trying to hold on to her newly found confidence.

"I love you," Hermione whispered before stroking Ron's chest and bending forward to kiss his jaw then his neck. Ron's hands traveled from her waist around to her back and down her arse squeezing roughly.

"I love you, Hermione," Ron whispered back his voice hoarse with emotion, "I want you so much it hurts. You're so fucking sexy." Hermione laughed softly and ran her fingers through his hair.

It all may be new and awkward for them, but Hermione never felt more safe and relaxed. Every negative or nervous thought she had vanished with his words. Hermione raised her hips slowly up in the air then back down. Ron groaned and squeezed her arse tighter.

"Mmm that feels really good actually," Hermione said in awe and repeated the movement again.

"Brilliant," Ron said turning his head and kissing her on the lips. "Do it again and I'll move with you." She nodded and sat up a little bracing herself with her hands on his chest. This time when she lowered herself down Ron bucked his hips to meet her. Hermione moaned and Ron cried out some choice swear words as they set a heated rhythm, their eyes never looking away from one another. As their pace quickened Ron pulled her head down to kiss her hungrily. They gasped and muttered nonsensical words into each other's mouths while their hands gripped a part of each other's body. Hermione was holding onto Ron's shoulders for dear life while Ron was gripping her waist as tight as he could.

Hermione felt the rush of heat and butterflies start to fill her up and knew what was coming. The other few times Ron made her orgasm it was a gradual pressure that slowly built up inside of her and let go on a high. This time, however she didn't expect it to suddenly hit her like a freight train.

"Oh! Oh god. Oh…" she could no longer speak except make loud whimpering sounds as her orgasm hit its highest peak making her body go rigid. As the intensity wore off she collapsed on top of him and dropped her forehead against his.

"I love you," she murmured against his cheek kissing him slowly across his jaw and lips. He had still not let go and she bounced on top of him as he bucked into her repeatedly.

"Fuck…I'm gonna… love you…Her…mione," Ron said in a low growl. He quickly moved one hand up her back to grab a handful of hair and the other hand down to her arse to hold her in place while he slammed erratically into her.

Through her haze she felt a warm tingling sensation inside of her and realized he had finally let go. He shuddered one last time and pulled out. He loosened his grip and turned his head slowly to kiss her head. Hermione ignored the soreness and stickiness between her legs and burrowed her face into his neck. He was still breathing heavily and she felt his fast heartbeat thudding against her chest.

"Did we really just do that?" Ron breathed as he lightly stroked her back. Hermione giggled and sat up slowly. She gently used her hand to move his wet hair away from his eyes and down his flushed cheek. It felt so good to see such pleasure on his face especially after all the times he selflessly gave it to her without asking for any in return.

"Yes I do believe we did, didn't we?" Hermione smiled down at him and his face broke into a lopsided grin. He pulled her down for a lingering kiss. When she sat back up she looked around the room at the mess they created. Reality started to set in. "As much as I would love to lie on the floor with you I think we should probably clean up before my mum and dad come back." She went to push herself off of him, but was pulled back down. She stopped when she saw Ron with a serious expression on his face.

"Hey…can I ask you something?"

"Of course," Hermione said immediately, her brows furrowed.

Ron peered in her eyes and tugged on a strand of her hair. "Was this alright? I mean I don't want you to have any regrets and I'm sorry it wasn't as romantic as you-"

"I think," Hermione interrupted and kissed him lightly on the lips, "that it was exactly how it was supposed to be. Not planned the way I had it in my head and a bit sooner than I thought it would be given our location, but it just felt…right. Does that make sense?"

Ron let out a breath and grinned. "Yea it felt right…also brilliant, fantastic, bloody incredible!" She laughed and smacked his arm. Ron gave her another kiss and said, "Next time I promise it will be more special. Perhaps even on a bed?"

"That would be nice," she said quietly. Hermione blushed at the thought of them trying again. As good as she felt she can only imagine how much better it will be in a more comfortable setting with the awkwardness of their first time now out of the way.

Ron sat up with Hermione in his lap and enclosed her in a warm hug. She wrapped her arms around his neck and closed her eyes. She never felt so close to anyone in her life. She thought about the magnitude of what they just experienced together and knew in that moment she will never find anyone or anything that can make her as happy or mad as Ron does. They were meant for each other and for that reason she knew in her heart that there were no regrets. She felt her eyes water and she sniffed back her tears.

"I don't want to let you go," Ron muttered into her hair making them both chuckle. Hermione unwrapped her arms and pulled back. She was a bit shocked to see that Ron's eyes were wet. She leaned in and kissed his eyelids softly.

"Perfect. Now I feel like a poof," Ron said wiping his face.

"Not after you thoroughly shagged me right here on the floor. No, you are not a poof I can assure you," Hermione said and laughed at Ron's shocked face.

"You're mental. I love you," Ron said simply and grinned widely.

Hermione went to tease him some more when suddenly they heard movement from downstairs. A door closed loudly and she realized her parents had come back to the house. Ron and Hermione scrambled around the floor to disassemble themselves from one another and dive for their clothes which were strewn across the room. Hermione found her wand and performed a cleaning spell on herself before tugging her knickers on. She looked over at Ron who was already dressed and bouncing on one foot trying to cram his foot into his trainer. She wondered how he was able to get dressed so quickly while she barely had any clothes on.

"Hermione as much as I love seeing your tits you need to get dressed. Now," Ron hissed at her. Before Hermione could retort back with something about him being rude she got hit in the face with her bra.

"Sorry," Ron said and laughed at her.

"Oh very funny," she said. "We'll see about whether or not you ever see these  _tits_  again," Hermione whispered at him satisfied when he just stood there with his mouth open.

"Hermione! Ron! We're back!" they heard her mum shout from downstairs. "We're going out to dinner so get down here before your father eats everything in the refrigerator!"

Hermione, still in her knickers and bra, ran to the door and opened it a crack. "We'll be down mum! Just finishing packing the office!"

She quickly put the rest of her clothes on and with Ron's help they levitated the books and threw them haphazardly into the box and the papers into random bins no longer caring about any kind of order. If her parents didn't care to organize them why should she? She hurriedly gathered her hair in a ponytail and turned to Ron who was shifting from one foot to another.

"Do I look alright?"Hermione asked him nervously.

"You look great, Hermione," Ron answered distractedly while trying to tame his hair with both hands. "Hey do you think they would notice that we…you know? Do muggles have some kind of radar for this type of thing?"

Hermione covered her mouth with her hand to muffle her laugh then cleared her throat. "No, Ron there is nothing like that I promise."

"Oh good," Ron exhaled and grabbed her hand pulling her out the door and towards the staircase.

"Hey you were only joking about me never seeing your tits again, right?" he whispered from behind her as they made their way down the steps. Hermione just shook her head and laughed. They walked into the living room where her mum was waiting for them.

"Oh there you are," Luann said looking up from the mail she was sifting through. She frowned suddenly and said, "You know it's going to be strange not getting mail for Monica and Wendell anymore. It's hard to believe that before a few days ago that's who we thought we were. So strange."

Hermione stared at her mum and didn't know what to say. She honestly thought they would be furious with her once she got their memories back and would never speak to her again after what she did to them. Ever since she and Ron explained everything to them she was pleasantly surprised at how understanding they have been. Deciding to move back to London to get their old lives back so soon was also a shock to Hermione, but she was so overjoyed at having them back and getting them where they belonged that she didn't think about what it meant for them to leave this life in Australia behind. She felt Ron squeeze her hand and glanced up at his smiling face. He knew what she was thinking and for the hundredth time in just 3 days she was glad she decided to bring him along. She let go of his hand and walked over to her mum nervously.

"Mum, I know we talked about it before, but through all my preparations and planning for some reason I didn't think about how you and dad would feel about actually leaving Australia after being here for so long. It's like I'm uprooting you all over again. I'm so sorry," Hermione's voice broke and she shook her head looking down at the floor.

Luann pulled her into a hug and rubbed her back. "Oh honey I'm not going to lie and say we weren't shocked and upset with you after that first night. We stayed up very late talking that night, your father and I. We don't belong here. We know that now." She pulled away and placed her hands on Hermione's shoulders. Her mum glanced over towards the doorway and Hermione turned around seeing her father standing there watching them quietly. She could tell he had heard everything.

"Daddy, I'm so sorry!" Hermione cried out and ran to hug him.

Hugo sighed and squeezed his daughter tight before letting go to look in her face and speaking firmly, "We also talked about it again today while we were out and we agreed that while this is all new and well, for lack of a better term, insane, we still love you no matter what. We understand why you did what you did and we just have to learn to deal with it. We're not going to lose you again. Not over something you did to protect us for goodness sake," he finished with a chuckle. Hermione wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and smiled back at him. She felt better, but knew she would never stop feeling guilty over her actions.

She heard Ron clear his throat from behind her and the three of them all turned to him. Ron rubbed his neck with one hand and looked at them sheepishly. "Er…this is all great and everything, but did you say something about dinner or…"

Hugo laughed uproariously and walked over to clap Ron on the shoulder.

"Ron, my boy, you're a man after your girlfriend's father's heart," Hugo laughed and swung his arm over Ron's shoulders. "Let's go ladies, we men have to eat!" With that he steered Ron out the front door. Ron looked back to Hermione and shrugged his shoulders. Hermione laughed along with her mother as they followed them outside to the car. It never ceased to amaze Hermione how unknowingly charming Ron could be at times.

The ride to the restaurant was an interesting one. Ron was only ever in a car once when they took the taxi to her parents' house and that was in the backseat. Hugo insisted he sit in the passenger seat to get the 'full effect'.

It was starting to become dark out and the sky was a dark blue tinged with pink and purple. Hermione was sitting behind her dad gazing out the window and feeling really relaxed. Her mind wandered, as they drove, to their rendezvous on the floor. She couldn't believe that not even an hour ago she lost her virginity. She knew outwardly she looked no different, but inside she felt like a new woman. It was like something deep down inside of her was being awakened and it both scared her and peaked her innate curiosity. She shifted in her seat and tried to remain passive and not let her thoughts show through her burning face.

"The full effect would be actually driving the car wouldn't it?" Ron asked as they cruised down the street.

Hermione snapped her head up when she heard Ron's question, ears trained into the conversation. She was just getting Ron comfortable in the muggle world and she knew it would be a slow process as there was so much to learn. Driving a car would be absolute last on her list of Things Ron Should Do as a Muggle. She also knew her father and dreaded what his response would be. She was right to groan out loud and palm her forehead.

"Oh well I can certainly teach you! It's not as hard as everyone thinks it is, you know," Hugo said as he sharply turned a corner and then skidding to a stop at a red light. "See? Not hard at all."

"Dear please remember to slow down before approaching a light," Luann said flatly. "I mean honestly. Everytime…" she finished and shook her head turning to look out the window.

Ron beamed at him and turned around in his seat smiling widely at Hermione. She thought he looked adorable, but it wasn't going to work. She glared at him and slowly shook her head. There was no way she would allow him to drive any time soon, especially not with her father as the instructor who never found a stop sign he liked and yelled at yellow lights occasionally.

"Oh come on Hermione," Ron whined then quickly grabbed the dash as Hugo made another sharp turn. "He said he could teach me. It will be so much fun! I have driven a car before, you know."

"Ron that was a flying car. That wasn't driving. It was more like keeping it in the air before you plummeted into the Whomping Willow. Or did you forget that little accident?" Hermione said and crossed her arms across her chest knowing she was going to win this one. Ron opened his eyes giving her an innocent look and Hermione huffed at him and shook her head. She was determined not to back down.

"Wait," Hugo said, "You flew a flying car? How did no one see that?"

Ron turned to Hugo and grinned wickedly before saying, "You can make it invisible."

Hugo looked at Ron and they laughed together. "Of course you can! Why not right?" Hugo said with a chuckle shaking his head.

"Hugo, you just passed the restaurant, dear," Luann said calmly pointing out the window behind her. Hermione rolled her eyes and shared a knowing look with her mother. This wasn't anything new for them. She smiled as she thought how much she missed them.

Hugo made a U-turn in the middle of the street making Hermione shake her head again when Ron smiled back at her nodding his head. She mouthed the words 'No way' but he just shrugged his shoulders.

_If he thinks he would win me over later he is sorely mistaken._

…..

Her parents had taken them to a nice casual family restaurant which was a relief given the fact that Ron and Hermione weren't exactly dressed for a more formal place. They were still dressed in shorts and t-shirts. In their rush to get downstairs they didn't bother to change clothes. Hermione was also grateful because she knew Ron would feel out of place and embarrassed in a more expensive setting. He would never say so, but she knew the lack of money in his family was a sore spot for him. Still, as casual as the place was it was not very often he went out to eat dinner if at all. He was used to home cooked meals every night made by his mum and the never ending supply of food that filled the great hall at mealtimes.

So far he was able to contain himself and as they ate most of the conversation revolved around dentistry and Ron's questions about why anyone in their right mind would want another person's fingers in their mouths. A concept that had all of them contemplating for several minutes. After eating his desert Ron announced he had to use the loo and Hugo offered to go with him since there were some muggle gadgets he said he should explain like the automatic hand dryer, sink and self flushing toilet. Ron and Hugo were talking loudly about soap dispensers on their way to the loo causing a few people at surrounding tables to stare. If Ron said muggle one more time Hermione swore she might stab him with a fork.

"So, Hermione tell me when this started with the two of you," her mum said after finishing her desert.

Hermione paused halfway through the most delicious chocolate cake she ever tasted and put down her fork to rest her chin in her hand. "Well I guess it depends what you mean by 'it'. For me it started around 4th year around Yule Ball time. I suppose it will be the same with Ron looking back at how jealous he was that I went with someone else." Hermione chuckled at the memory and how young and silly they were back then. It all seems so petty after everything they've been through together and all the obstacles they overcame to get where they were at now.

Luann peered at her and asked, "So you started going out at 14? How did we not know this?"

"Oh no," Hermione laughed, "We didn't start going out then. That's just when I realized my feelings for him and it all just kind of snowballed from there. No nothing actually happened until…well a few months ago. It was right in the middle of the battle at Hogwarts." She grimaced at her mum who looked confused. "I sort of…kissed him. Right there with all the fighting going on around us. We were inside away from everything, but we could hear everything blowing up and he said something so clever and sweet and I just couldn't hold it in any longer. So I kissed him, right on the mouth," she laughed out loud at the absurdity of what she was saying.

"Well Hermione I am surprised that you took the initiative. That's so spontaneous of you," her mum said chuckling along with Hermione. "I reckon he was pleased then?" Hermione nodded blushing. "And you've been together ever since?"

Hermione's face fell slightly as she recalled the circumstances around their making the relationship official. "Well not exactly. See…his brother had just died and living in that house with everyone grieving... it was difficult to get anything going. I didn't mind waiting," Hermione rushed to say and her mum nodded solemnly covering Hermione's hand with her own. "But being so close to him and not acting on those feelings was really hard. It wasn't until about two weeks after the war ended that we kissed again and we…said we loved each other. I think that made it official enough. It was after a panic attack actually…It seems nothing is ever easy for us is it?" Hermione said with a sigh.

Her mum squeezed her hand and said, "It looks plenty easy to me now. He takes care of you, Hermione. I can see that with just one look he gives you. And the way he helped you yesterday was just amazing. I can also see how much you love him."

Hermione smiled and felt her face grow warm at her mother's words. It felt good to hear that coming from someone on the outside looking in. "Thank you for saying that, mum. And you're right. It does feels a bit easier now and even if he drives me mental sometimes he's worth it. I really do love him," she said with a skip in her heart. She breathed deeply and let out a laugh.

"That is so sweet, honey. And you know we love him. He's so darling and I think your father found his new best friend the way he carries on about him," Luann said and looked past Hermione's shoulder. "Oh speaking of those two here they come."

"Hermione, did you know that you can use the loo and never have to touch a thing? If your dad hadn't told me about sensors and all that muggle stuff I would think there was magic going on around here!" Ron sat down across from Hermione and took her plate of half finished cake. "Oh cake. Thanks, love."

Hugo sat down next to him and ordered a coffee for him and Luann from the passing waitress.

Hermione rolled her eyes and smiled sweetly at the couple sitting next to them who was staring at Ron as if he were from another planet.

 _If they only knew_ , Hermione thought waving at them. They quickly turned around to their plates and Hermione regarded Ron who was shoving chocolate cake into his mouth.

"Oh my god this is fantastic," Ron said after swallowing and reached in with the fork for another bite.

"Oh sure just take it, Ron. Nevermind the bowl of ice cream you already inhaled before you went to the loo," Hermione hissed and snatched the plate back from him setting it in front of her before he could steal another bite. "And remember what I said about the M word?"

Ron had the decency to look guilty and swallowed thickly. "Oh right, your dad said something like that in the loo. Sorry, it just keeps slipping out. That really is good chocolate…" he said reaching again for Hermione's plate. She smacked his hand away and shoveled a huge bite into her mouth.

"Well that will show him, Hermione. Good on you," her dad said laughing into his cup. Ron cracked up laughing and clapped his hands watching Hermione work her way around the mound of chocolate in her mouth. Hermione snorted and laughed almost blowing cake out of mouth and quickly ate it then drank from her water.

"Mmmm so good," Hermione said dreamily after she swallowed and smacked her lips at Ron. His laughter slowed to a chuckle as he stared at her lips making her face grow hot. Suddenly she felt something touch her ankle then press up her leg to her knee. She coughed and sputtered reaching for her water once more and reaching down with one hand to swat Ron's foot away from her thigh.

"So we haven't talked about what you plan to do this September. Will the school be open to students? Seeing as you both didn't finish your last year it makes sense to go back, right?" her dad asked. Hermione was glad for the distraction and that no one noticed their brief exchange, but her stomach plummeted when she hear the topic of conversation. She was avoiding even thinking about September up until now. Before she could speak Ron chimed in with a smile in Hermione's direction.

"The school will be open, yeah. Hermione's going back of course." She smiled weakly at him knowing that what he was going to say next would only make her feel worse. "I won't be going back, though. The Ministry offered us early admittance into the Auror training program. Harry and I will be taking the NEWTS in December and start training in the Spring."

Hermione looked from her mum to her dad who both wore identical serious expressions. She held her breath waiting for their reaction.

"Alright," Luann said slowly looking at Hugo who shrugged. "Ron, honey…What's an Auror?"

Ron breathed out a laugh and said, "Oh right. It's a dark wizard catcher. They catch the bad guys, so to speak."

"Like policemen?" Hugo asked suddenly interested.

"Exactly,' Hermione said smiling at Ron to try and show him she wasn't bothered. She was still really nervous about him becoming an Auror, but she promised to be more supportive. If this is what he really wanted to do then she will have to learn to accept it. Her mum must have noticed her hesitation because she frowned and asked cautiously, "How do you feel about Ron being an Auror, Hermione?"

Hermione should have anticipated this question, but she still felt taken aback. "Er…well," she glanced at Ron who was looking at her with the same serious expression waiting for her answer. "I think that it's something Ron wants to do and something I believe he will excel in. I'm proud of him no matter what he does."

Rom smiled warmly at her from across the table and she smiled back easily. What she said was the truth. She had no doubt he would be an excellent Auror. The worries were still the same and as much as it upset her to know that eventually he will be putting his life in danger yet again she tried not to let her apprehension show. She knew she said the right thing when Ron reached across the table and kissed her hand. She blushed and saw her parents give each other knowing smiles.

Hugo set his cup down and beckoned for the check. "Well I think it's great, both of you. I'm so happy you decided to finish your education, Hermione. And Ron, no offense but I don't really see you in a classroom anyway. Dark wizard Catcher sounds like a more appropriate title I think."

Ron blushed and rubbed his neck. "Thank you, sir. That's really nice of you to say. I'm going to work hard at it. After everything…well it's just really important to me." He finished and looked down glaring at the table lost in thought.

"Well it is a dangerous job, I'm sure. Do you really want to go through that over again? It's such a risk," Luann asked.

"Mum please," Hermione muttered looking at Ron's flushed face.

"Luann, lay off the boy. He's obviously going to do it anyway. I think it's a noble profession. A career helping people and putting those sick and evil…people away is very respectable," Hugo said heatedly. The waitress came back with the check and they all stayed silent as he paid.

When the waitress finally walked away Luann said, "I can tell Hermione is upset about it and I have to admit I am too. We just don't want anything to happen to you, that's all."

Ron nodded and looked up at Luann with a forced smile. "Yeah I know. But Hermione and I talked about it already and she's alright with it, right Hermione?"

Hermione was listening to the conversation hoping she could just disappear without anyone noticing. Hearing her mum voice the concerns that were already in her head brought back all her insecurities about Ron going out and doing dangerous missions and possibly getting hurt or worse. Now she was thrust back in and once again forced herself to smile.

"Yes of course. We talked and like I said it's what he wants to do and I fully support him…Can we stop talking about this please?" she asked staring at her parents silently willing them to drop the subject. She glanced over at Ron who was glaring at her, questioning her with his eyes. He shook his head slightly and turned away from her. She felt the air leave her body and looked back to her parents smiling to cover her emotions.

"You're right, pumpkin. You are both adults now and can make your own decisions," Hugo said pointedly at his wife.

"Yes alright," Luann said rolling her eyes at him. She looked to Ron and squeezed his hand. "I really am sorry, Ron. I think Hermione's right that you will be an excellent Auror. Don't mind me being all motherly." Ron smiled genuinely at her and nodded his head.

"Thanks. But, it's fine. I understand. My mother isn't too happy about it either, but she's coming around." He glanced at Hermione and when she tried to smile at him he looked away again avoiding her eyes. Hermione's heart raced as she sat there confused at his behavior. Before she could think on it any longer her dad stood up ceasing any more conversation.

"Now that that's settled I say we get out of here. It's getting late and we have a long day tomorrow," Hugo said and they each followed him out the restaurant to the car.

The ride back was much quieter than when they were going. Ron was quiet in the front seat and only glanced back at Hermione a few times to catch her eye, not smiling. Hermione's heart ached at this and couldn't wait to get him alone to fix whatever was going on between them.

…..

"Just admit it, Hermione. You're still mad about me being an Auror aren't you?" Ron asked loudly with his arms wide. His face was flushed red and his chest was heaving.

"That is not true Ron! We talked about this and what I said tonight I meant that!" Hermione yelled back. She pulled her wand out and cast a silencing charm on the room so her parents wouldn't hear them. She threw it down on the bed and pulled her bag in front of her taking out their sleeping clothes and tossing them on the bed.

After an uncomfortable ride back to the house her parents had retreated upstairs after saying their good nights and Luann apologized to Ron again for making him upset. He was very gracious towards her and reassured her he was fine. When they were finally in their room Ron stalked upstairs and quickly turned the desk and chair back into the double bed without a word to Hermione. She followed him upstairs and after closing the door he had rounded on her asking her why she was acting so strange at dinner. Now she was stuck having to defend herself and try to convince him that nothing was wrong while trying to reign in her own anger.

"I don't know what you want me to say Ron," Hermione said yanking out her toothbrush and looked up at him. He was standing on the other side of the bed staring at her breathing through his nose.

"Look," Ron said quietly. He took a deep breath and walked around the bed to stand in front of Hermione. "I know it's going to take some time to get used to the idea. I'm not that daft that I thought you would just automatically be happy about it. What makes me mental is that you feel this need to try and hide it. I can see through you, Hermione. I can tell when you're lying and that burns me up like nothing else." He stared into her eyes and she suddenly felt very small. He called her a liar and she had to admit it hurt her. Really bad. She has been called many things in her life, but a liar, coming from Ron, cut her the most.

She took a shuddering breath and pushed him away from her. He stepped back and she walked around him to the other side of the room to pace the small area of floor in front of the door.

_How dare he call me a liar! I am just trying to be supportive. Like he wanted me to be! If I say how I really feel I'm not supportive enough. If I don't say anything negative and only relay the positive things then suddenly I'm a liar?_

"Hermione you can't talk your way out of this, you know," Ron said sitting on the bed to stare at a pacing Hermione and reached out to grab her hand. She snatched it away and crossed her arms on her chest.

"I'm not trying to get  _out_  of anything. Why would you presume to tell me what I'm thinking now?" Hermione said coolly.

Ron sighed loudly and rubbed his face aggressively. "Because I can see the smoke coming out of your ears and I know you're thinking of a way to make this my fault, but it's not this time, Hermione. I don't know why you insist on-"

"If you call me a liar one more time Ronald Weasley I will hex your bollocks off," Hermione said through her teeth and walked up close to Ron standing over him glaring. She felt satisfied when she saw him gulp and open his eyes wide.

"I wasn't…I mean I was just saying," he shook his head and gently pushed her away to a safer distance. "Blimey, Hermione. Don't say things like that. I'm sorry, alright?" She rolled her eyes when he warily hid her wand back further on the bed away from reach.

Hermione continued as if he didn't say anything. He wanted honesty she was going to give it to him.

"You know you say you want me to be honest, but admit it that you expect me to be happy about this when you know how torn up I am inside thinking of how you could get hurt or-" her voice got stuck in her throat and she closed her eyes briefly to regain more control. Ron stood up quickly and grabbed her shoulders, but she shoved him off backing up against the door. She looked at him squarely in the face.

"Don't touch me, ok? I can't  _think_  when you touch me."

Ron stood frozen to the spot staring at her. "Ok I won't touch you, I promise," he said slowly with his hands in the air.

"And don't talk like that either! I'm not a small child or a…a pet," she yelled pointing her finger at him. She needed space and the small room they were in felt like it had gotten even smaller as she looked around. She shook her head to clear her mind and took deep breaths trying to remember what she was ranting about.

_Right, I'm not a child. He called me a liar. Expects me to play along as supportive girlfriend and not have any opinions._

"Hermione can I-"

"Don't! I…I can't pretend as if the thought of you…dying doesn't bother me. It's not fair to ask me in front of my parents to confirm that it's alright. It's not right," she said shaking her head vigorously. Tears were running down her face but she wiped them away frustrated at them. "I want to be fine with it, like Ginny. I want to be happy for you because it makes you happy…but how can something that makes me so unhappy make you happy? It's not logical. It doesn't make sense!" Hermione's voice became shrill towards the end and she hugged herself to still her shaky arms. She was looking at the floor and noticed Ron walk slowly towards her and stop in front of her close enough so he wasn't touching her, but she could smell him. The aroma of chocolate and soap filled her nose and she took a deep breath looking up at his face. She knew why she didn't want him close to her. She was so angry with him and if he was allowed to be near her she would forget all of that and melt into him. Just as she was about to do right then.

"Hermione?" Ron whispered and reached out a hand to touch her shoulder tentatively. She sniffed, but didn't answer him. When she didn't pull away he took her other shoulder and in one quick motion pulled her into his body squeezing her tight.

Hermione softened a bit and dropped her arms to her sides as she sobbed into his shoulder.

"Hermione I don't expect you to ever be like that. No one does. I don't think even Ginny is that nonchalant about Harry going, either. I want to make sure we're honest with eachother. I just want you to be happy and if me being an Auror makes you this upset then…I reckon I don't have to be one. It's not worth it."

Hermione sobered quickly and popped her head up to look at him. "Are you serious?" she whispered in astonishment. She couldn't believe he would give it up just like that, and just for her.

Ron kissed her forehead and smiled sadly. "I would do anything for you, you know that."

Hermione stepped back and stared at him in awe. "There is no way in hell I'm going to let you do any such thing," she said firmly.

"But you just said-" Ron started saying, but Hermione cut him off clamping her hand over his mouth.

"I said you are not going to give up on being an Auror, Not for me or anything else, is that clear?" She let go of him and stood back watching the confusion settle over his face.

"You're not making any sense. I thought you would be happy about this. Isn't that what you wanted?"

"What I want is for both of us to be happy. This is what you want and you should do it. What I want to be at a place where I can accept it. I'm twisted around bend about it right now, but it I will get better. I will never forgive myself if I allowed you to sacrifice something like this. I just don't want to be expected to love the idea just yet. I need more time. Do you understand?"

He peered at her as if trying to figure something out. "So you're saying you're alright with me being an Auror, but you're really not…but you want to be…and think you might be…just not yet?"

"Er…right. Exactly" Hermione nodding her head and sighing with relief.

Ron ruffled his hair and blew out a deep breath. "Well alright then. Auror career back on. Are we ok?"

Hermione thought about it and even though everything was still the same she felt different. She was able to hold back her anxiety without Ron's help and it felt good. She got out what she needed to let him know and they were still together. No one stormed off and they actually talked through it. She felt she got through to him which she considers a tremendous feat.

Hermione lifted her head up and kissed him lightly. "Yes we are. I'm sorry for acting like a basket case, once again," she said rolling her eyes. He grinned at her and cupped her cheeks in his hands.

"Basket case or not, you're mine. We take care of each other, yeah?"

Hermione smiled thinking about her mum saying the same thing earlier at dinner. She moved her hands up into his hair and her heart swelled as he closed his eyes and dropped his forehead on her shoulder.

"Everyday we'll take care of each other. That I can say for a fact," Hermione said kissing the top of his head and breathing in his scent that was so Ron. She felt her heart beat faster when his hands palmed against her back sliding up until they were on the back of her neck. He used one hand to let her ponytail loose and buried his hands in her hair.

"I love your hair." Ron mumbled against her shoulder kissing her lightly there and rubbing his cheek on her sighing contentedly.

"Yes I know you've told me…many times," Hermione giggled when he pulled on a thick curl at the nape of her neck

"Shut it. I can say I love your hair as many times as I want," he said yawning and fully rested his head on her shoulder pulling her close. "I don't like fighting with you anymore, Hermione. It's not as fun as it used to be," he said sleepily.

Hermione ran her hands up and down his back soothingly and whispered, "I know what you mean. Let's keep our fights to more useless topics like dirty noses and pesky cats."

He chuckled against her and squeezed her tight. She felt so at peace in that moment. Like nothing could touch them. She was reminded of what they did together just hours earlier and how they held each other afterwards. The memory made her blush and she wondered when they would be together like that again.

"Ron? Are you awake?" she asked quietly. He was starting to feel heavy leaning on her and his arms had slacked a little on her back.

"Yea! I'm awake," Ron said quickly standing up to his full height. "I guess I'm really knackered," he said sheepishly.

Hermione was disappointed, but then she found herself yawning and feeling drowsy. "Same here. We should just go to sleep. We do have a lot to do tomorrow."

"Yea you're right," Ron said stretching before grabbing his sleeping clothes and toothbrush from the bed and going to the loo.

When Hermione took her turn and came back into the room she grinned at the sight before her. Ro was in bed under the covers without a shirt on. He beckoned to Hermione to join him holding out his arms to her.

She stared for a second taking in the image of him in the bed and smiled to herself. She could get used to seeing this every night for the rest of her life. With that thought Hermione clamored into the bed and shimmied under the covers. Hermione gave Ron a soft kiss and turned her back to him. She felt him envelope her into his warm body pulling her close. She snuggled deeper into him and sighed heavily as she stroked his bare arm that was draped over her middle. He burrowed his face into her hair and found her neck with his lips planting a kiss next to her ear.

"Love you, Hermione. Good night," he whispered and settled his head behind hers.

"Love you, too. Good night, Ron," Hermione whispered back. Minutes later she heard the sound of Ron's steady breathing. Her body was tired, but her mind was racing, thinking about everything that happened that day. It was a long time before she could finally fall asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This is an angst-ridden chapter with no lemon. Not even a slice. Maybe a squirt in the eye, but it won't sting. If that makes sense…
> 
> Disclaimer: Isn't it obvious that I don't own Harry Potter?

"Bloody hell, its enormous," Ron muttered under his breath. He struggled to keep a straight face when Hermione looked over her shoulder at him.

"What did you say, Ron?" she asked.

"Oh just that I'm glad we're finally here," he said quickly.

Hermione turned around to face him. "So am I," she said as she shifted the bag she was holding in her hand to her shoulder.

Before they left Australia Hermione had shrunk and stored her parent's belongings into one of her dad's duffel bags and cast a weightless charm on it. It was easy enough to get inside the Australian Ministry, activate the shoelace portkey then apparate to a side road near Hermione's childhood home. They had left after lunch, but now that they were back in London it was morning all over again.

"Is it heavy? Do you want me take it for you?" Ron asked Hermione ready to shoulder the bag she was carrying along with both of their rucksacks he was already holding.

"No, don't be silly. It weighs almost nothing," she said gripping the strap of bag tightly. Ron frowned at her. She looked nervous. No, she looked…scared.

"Hermione, it's going to be fine. Look," Ron said as he gently grabbed her shoulders and turned her back around. "See? Just like we said. It hasn't been touched, right?" He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and propped his chin on the top of her head. She sighed and leaned back further into him. He smiled to himself thinking how perfectly her small fame fit against him, like a well worn glove.

He used that moment to look up and around at the three story house that was currently towering over them. He was finding it hard to believe that such a down to earth, kind and gentle human like herself could grow up in an immaculate home such as the one they were about to enter. The outside of the house was covered in stone and brick making it a lot more welcome despite its large size. The Grangers decorated their front lawn with bright green grass and flowers of every color on either side of the flagstone pathway. He smiled at the ceramic gnomes standing guard on either side of the steps. How he could ever mistake these cute little statues with those annoying buggers in his own yard was beyond him.

Ron peered up at the many windows and noticed every shade was drawn blocking the morning sun from penetrating through the house. He wondered which one led to Hermione's bedroom then blushed furiously as dirty thoughts of having his way with her in her childhood bedroom instantly turned him on. He just wanted to enjoy the time they had with each other before they had to return to the Burrow with its open door policy and Ginny's constant pledge to be a cock blocker.

"I don't know why I'm so anxious," Hermione said and shrugged her shoulders. "I just can't shake this feeling that something's not right."

He shook his head to throw all the horny thoughts to the back of his brain and focus on actually getting Hermione inside the house.

"Come on, Hermione. You'll feel better once we get inside and you can relax." He stepped back from her and grabbed her hand pulling her towards the stone steps leading up to the bright blue wooden front door.

"Here we are," Hermione said releasing Ron's hand and taking a metal key out of her pocket.

"Oh for goodness…I can't-" she grumbled flipping her hair angrily over her shoulder making Ron veer back so he wouldn't get smacked in the face with it . Her hands were trembling as they couldn't fit the key in the lock. She stepped back breathing heavily.

Ron squeezed her hand briefly and flashed a reassuring smile even though he was truly concerned. "It's alright," he said softly, "I'll open it, yeah?"

"No you-" she started then stopped abruptly when he took his wand out and easily opened the door using Alohomora.

"-weren't supposed to do that," she said quietly her voice trembling. He didn't understand. Why would opening the door be a problem? He glanced at Hermione once before turning the knob and swinging the door open into the house.

"No Ron!" Hermione yelled. Suddenly he felt her shove him hard down onto the stone landing just outside the front door. His hands broke his fall, but he grunted loudly as she dropped heavily on top of his back knocking his shoulder into the stone below him.

"What the fucking hell, Hermione!" he groaned after getting his breath back after having it knocked out of him. He arched his back which signaled Hermione to scramble off of him. He sat up on his knees and rubbed his shoulder glaring at Hermione was who was kneeling and peering into the dark house.

"I had put anti-magic spells over the house to prevent any Deatheaters from getting in that way. You should not have been able to open that door, Ron," Hermione said breathlessly. She had a hand on her chest and looked anxiously over at him. Now he understood why she tried to stop him.

"Alright, so obviously the spell either wore off or they broke it down," Ron said as he got up on his feet. "Did you rig something to come out if someone did get in? Did you see something just now? Hermione, why in Merlin's beard did you tackle me?"

"Sorry," she said taking Ron's outstretched hand and standing next to him in the doorway. "I didn't rig anything, but since you got in I thought maybe Deatheaters might have. I didn't know what to expect."

Ron felt like a tit for overreacting and also for not thinking of that same scenario himself. He was supposed to be the one protecting her, not the other way around.

 _Some Auror you'll make_ , he thought.

"It's alright," he said then ran his hand over his face. "I feel so fucking stupid. I should have known you would set that kind of protection. We should be more careful now, yeah?"

"Definitely," Hermione said with a nod. He noticed her bottom lip tremble before she took it into her mouth. She glanced over at him and he smiled at her once again feigning confidence.

"Let's take it slow and take each room one at a time," he said as he picked up the bags and lit his wand pointing it out in front of him. "I'll go first. You never know with those fuckers."

_Well Weasley, you want to be an Auror. Here's your chance to show Hermione what you're made of. Please God don't let there be any spiders in here._

He cautiously stepped over the threshold and moved forward hearing Hermione follow right behind him. The lights from their wands bounced around the walls and floors as they moved. She mumbled the spell to reveal if anyone else was in the house. They both let out matching sighs of relief when nothing happened.

"Looks good in here," Ron said sweeping his eyes over the ceiling, walls and down to the hardwood floor. A round ornate table sat in the center of the foyer between the front door and an impressive wooden staircase. A cozy looking armchair sat in the corner near the front door. He noticed large doors on either side of the foyer and a hallway next to the stairs leading to more rooms. He peered into one of the glass doors and wondered how big this house actually was. Regardless of its vast size, he shouldn't be surprised that their real home reflected the Grangers' good nature and welcoming personalities. He felt right at home the minute he stepped through the door.

"I like this place. If I were a muggle I reckon I would live in a place like this, yeah?" he said smiling over at Hermione who was busy turning on all the lights she could find. She beamed over at him then around the foyer taking it all in.

"Ron, I would love to know what you would have been like as a muggle. I really would," Hermione said with a chuckle. "But I like the Burrow. It's…cozier. Who needs all this space anyway?"

"Er…how about a family of nine?" Ron asked incredulously.

Hermione laughed and said, "Right, of course! More rooms for your mum to clean. She would love that."

"You don't realize, my mum loves to clean," Ron said as he opened the glass doors leading to the living room. The sofas were dark brown and there were large woven rugs thrown on the floor. The fireplace was stone and the walls were a light yellow. He noticed framed photos lining the walls and even more photos across the top of a piano in the corner of the room.

"I'm sure that's not true, Ron… Wow I forgot how many photos my mum had around here. I should set them right before we move on," Hermione said then walked around tapping her wand against frame after frame changing them back to their original Hermione-ful states. He moved to the opposite side of the room to the windows pulling the shades up to let in the sunlight. He felt at peace and was starting to feel confident that the rest of the house should be about the same when he heard a piercing scream come from a different part of the house followed by thunderous crashing and banging sounds. Ron spun around searching for Hermione and swore loudly when he realized she must have left the room while he was busy admiring the view.

 _Great going you bloody prat,_  he thought as he tripped over a rug in his haste to flee from the room.  _Turn your back for one fucking second…it'll be a miracle if you make it through fucking Auror training without embarrassment._

"Hermione! Where are you? I'm coming!" he shouted when he made it back out to the foyer.

"I'm here!" He heard her voice coming from the hallway next to the stairs. When he found her she was sitting on the floor in the hallway, breathless with her hand to her chest. "In the kitchen… Oh god, it's horrible!" she wheezed and pointed to the doorway in front of her. With his heart still racing he held his wand out ready to hex the first thing that moved. He helped a shaking Hermione up onto her feet and behind him.

"Holy shit," was all he could find to say as he looked around to take in the site before him. Anything that resembled a kitchen was lost in an enormous pile of broken glass, wood, stone and metal. He could see cabinet doors thrown to the floor, gaping holes where he thought a refrigerator and stove should have been. Hermione flinched as pieces of debris were still falling, clattering and banging to the ground. A disturbing amount of anger started to rise within him heating his legs and flaming through his chest.

His temper receded when he heard Hermione speak from over his shoulder. "I thought it would be alright since the living room was okay, but when I walked in this…thing fell from the ceiling and rolled off the counter. Before I could even get my wand up the room was filled with smoke and everything in the room just… exploded," she said and pointed to a small red ball, small enough to fit inside his hand, on the floor near their feet. It was plain and metallic looking, no buttons or seams. He kicked it lightly with the toe of his trainer. The red ball rolled away clattering against the rubble. The object didn't seem dodgy having done what it was supposed to do so, ignoring Hermione's small gasp next to him, he picked it up. Turning it over in his hand it felt cold, but at least he didn't feel anything from it, unlike that blasted locket he was forced to wear months ago. He shivered at the thought and pocketed the object.

"I think I'll hold on to this for now and take it back with us. I can give it to dad. I'm sure he knows someone who can take a look at it."

"Oh my god… I'm shaking," Hermione said suddenly, wrapping her arms around her stomach and bending over. Ron grabbed her around the waist and held her close. She trembled in his arms and he assumed it was from shock.

_Those bloody fuckers are going to fucking pay for this. If her parents had been here when they came…If Hermione-_

"Come on, easy now" Ron said gruffly and turned around swiftly still holding a crying Hermione and steered her out of the room and back to the foyer. He didn't want her to stay looking at that mess any longer than she had to. He was using everything he had to hold his temper in so he wouldn't explode in much the same way the kitchen had. Looking at Hermione's large eyes and the fear and anger behind them helped to calm him down and act on his protective instinct that manifested itself whenever it came to Hermione. He took a deep breath and stroked her back. He froze as his hand met something wet and sticky. The movement made her jump and hiss in pain.

"Turn around," he said spinning her around before she could answer

"Ow, Ron!" She protested and staggered on one leg. "I think something's wrong with my leg, too," she said through sharp breaths.

Ron looked her over and closed his eyes briefly to stem the flow of profanities that wanted to run out of his mouth. Hermione was wearing a blue striped vest with thin straps leaving most of her back exposed and white shorts that went just above the knees. Ron could see a large bruise the size of his fist forming on her shoulder blade with a gash in the middle of it. There was blood seeping onto the edge of her top. He reached out and, as he held his breath, gingerly moved the fabric to the side away from the wound. Her body jumped again at his touch and he quickly withdrew his hand.

"Sorry."

"Is it bad? Ron, please. The pain is getting worse," she whispered her whole body shaking as she choked on her sobs.

"Er yea it's…well it's not that bad actually. It's more of a bruise really," he said trying to sound comforting. Then he saw the long bruise on the back of her right calf that was turning purple. He was grateful there wasn't any bleeding, but he didn't understand how she was able to even stand with these injuries.

_Get it together. It's just like you said, not that bad. You can fix this easily._

"Hermione, you should sit down. Let me take a look at you, alright? Do have any dittany with you?"

She nodded her head and pointed to her bag on the floor. Ron helped her into the armchair and ran to the bag. After summoning the flask of dittany he then closed the front door, locking it for good measure.

Ron hurried back to Hermione who was sitting where he left her bent forward with her arms across her lap and her head between her legs, taking short breaths.

"Hermione, love, breathe," Ron said soothingly as he placed the dittany on the floor and dropped down to his knees in front of her. He took her hands in his and rested them on her knees. He felt her squeeze them so tight his knuckles cracked.

Hermione leaned her sweaty forehead on top of their joined hands taking shaky breaths. "I'm spinning," she whispered into his hands, her quick breaths making his crunched knuckles hot.

Ron bent his head down and kissed the top of her curly head. "Shh. It will go away. Concentrate on something. I…I can sing?" he closed his eyes and silently cursed himself for being such a sod. He felt her shoulders shake and heard her sniff loudly.

He frowned and said, "Oi, my voice isn't that bad." He wasn't sure if she was crying or laughing, but he thought he might try humor as a last resort.

"I never heard you sing, Ron," Hermione said as she turned her head so her cheek was resting on his hands. She was no longer crying and her breathing was noticeably slower.

"Be glad for that," he said before he kissed her temple and then her cheek tasting her salty tears.

He brought his body in closer and bent to kiss the skin on her shoulder up to her neck. He saw her eyelashes flutter and her lips part taking in a deep breath. He couldn't resist placing a gently kiss on her lips causing her to lift her head and open her eyes.

"Ouch. Thank you," she winced then smiled weakly down at him.

"Are you okay?" he asked cautiously staring at her face. Her cheeks were flushed still wet from her tears and her hair was a frizzy mess.

"Yeah, I think so," she said clearing her throat and unsticking her hands from his. He smiled at her as he flexed his fingers.

"Good. Let's see to your back then. Bend over again, okay?" She did as he asked as he bent down to retrieve the dittany pouring a liberal amount into his palm.

It was then that they heard a loud bang echo from upstairs. They both snapped their heads toward the stairs then at each other.

"Ron? I did the spell…there's no one else here," she stuttered.

Ron was torn between tending to her back and running up those stairs leaving her behind to check on the noise. He decided to do both.

"Sorry this isn't going to be as gentle as I had hoped," he said before standing up and lathering the handful of dittany on her wound quickly. Hermione cried out gasping. Then he heard her breathing start to slow down as he knew the pain was subsiding. The wound closed, but the bruise was still there.

"It won't do anything for the bruising, but you're no longer bleeding," he said quickly tossing the closed flask of dittany into the bag. "I'll be right back."

She stood up straight and gasped again wincing slightly. "Okay, let's go," she said walking towards the stairs. Ron noticed her suck her breath and limp with every step.

"Right. What I meant to say was I'll be right back and  _you_  stay here. I'll go check it out. You can't even walk."

"Yes I can walk, Ron. Don't be ridiculous. We need to find out what that noise was and I am not letting you go up there by yourself," she hissed at him with a grimace. He knew she was trying to hide her pain which made him even more frustrated. He gently, but firmly, sat her back down.

"Hermione. Stay. Here," he said through his teeth and turned around to make his way up the stairs.

"No! You can't just leave me here," she called after him. Her voice sounded desperate and afraid although she was trying to cover it up with anger and stubbornness. He cursed under his breath and walked back down to her, grateful that she at least was still sitting where he left her.

"I am not going to sit down here like some little girl while you play hero. I already told you there's no one in this house. Besides, you've never been here before. You need me to show you where everything is."

She had a point, even if it was a weak one, but Ron was impatient to get up those stairs. Without a word he offered her his hand and helped her out of the chair. As they slowly ascended the stairs he once again had to reign in his urge to talk without thinking.

_If she wanted to get blasted again who the hell am I to stand in her way? Oh yea just her bloody fucking boyfriend! If anything else happens to her I'll hex my own bollocks off. Then why am I helping her up the damn stairs up to merlin knows what? Fuck, this woman can make me do anything._

They finally reached the landing and stood still listening for any sign of disturbance. A faint sound like something falling off a shelf came from down the hallway behind a door to their right. Hermione jumped and her hand flew to her chest.

"Bloody hell," she muttered. Normally Ron would tease her, but she looked so fearful that he was too worried about her having another panic attack to say anything about it.

"Hermione-," Ron whispered but was cut off as she shook her head vigorously.

"No. I want to know what's in there…That's my room." She looked up at Ron and he could feel her pleading with her eyes not to argue.

"Alright. Just stay behind me, yeah?"

Hermione nodded and gripped his hand tighter letting him lead her to her room.

"Relax, Hermione," Ron said willing her to stop shaking. He didn't want to admit it, but she was making him more nervous than whatever was inside that room.

"Sorry, I can't help it. I hate feeling like this. I'm so used to fighting, but I can't stop feeling scared.," she whispered as she held her wand tightly in her fist.

"I know. Look I'm sure it's nothing-"

"Whatever, Ron. Just open the door," she interrupted pushing him forward in front of her. He glanced back at her unnerved by her lack of confidence and bravery, both things he was so used to associating with Hermione. He shook it off and turned to push the door open that was already ajar. Unlike the other rooms in the house this one was bright as the sun beamed in through the large bay window. His heart was pounding in anticipation of an explosion similar to one in the kitchen.

As he stepped into the room his eyes adjusted to the bright sun and he noticed that it was a rather large room, bigger than his at the Burrow anyway. A double bed with dark blue covers sat in the corner, a vanity and dresser were set against one wall and a large desk flanked by two large bookcases took up another wall. He was a bit disappointed that it was so plain, but then remembered that Hermione must have cleared everything out that was hers before she left. He saw two more doors and moved closer to study them. One was open revealing a large empty closet and the other was closed. Ron guessed, by the size of the house, that the second one must be a bathroom. He walked carefully toward the closed door and felt Hermione move into the room behind him.

"Look, this must have been what fell," she said from behind the desk carefully bending over and up righting a wooden chair and picking up a book from the floor.

"Don't move, Hermione," Ron hissed and hurried over to Hermione's side. Before he could reach her something large and hairy flew out from under the bed and latched itself onto Hermione's chest.

"Ahhh!" she cried out stumbling back and hitting the desk with her hip.

"What the fuck!" Ron screamed and ran to Hermione pulling on the creature. It wouldn't let go of Hermione's shirt, its claws digging into her chest.

"Wait! Ron wait! Stop!" Hermione yelled as he tugged the animal off of her. She clutched her chest with her hand. Ron heard a hiss and a growl come from the hairy beast that was squirming in his hands.

"Bloody fucking shit!" he exclaimed as the creature bit into his hand causing Ron to reflexively let it go. It scampered back under the bed. "I don't fucking think so you little fucker!" All the anger he had built up all morning was about to be unleashed on this mangy animal. He had had enough for one day.

Ron dropped down to his hands and knees, ignoring the blood that was coming from the bite, and peered angrily under the bed searching for beady eyes so he can yank it out and give it a good beating.

"I said wait!" Hermione yelled as she plopped down on the floor cringing in obvious pain and pulling at Ron's sleeve. "Ron, look! It's only Crookshanks!" Hermione laughed breathlessly letting go of his shirt and edging closer to the bed on her belly.

"Here, boy,' she whispered. "It's just me, Hermione. Come out, its okay."

Ron sat back and watched the scene before him completely gobsmacked. Next thing he knew a large, orangy furball with a squashed face poked its head out and slowly crept toward Hermione's outstretched arms. It jumped and reattached itself to her chest, only this time without claws.

"Ow! Oh you poor thing," she flinched as she sat up then murmured to her pet, "You must have been so scared, weren't you? What are you doing here you sweet thing?"

_She really is going off the rails. I should have seen this coming. It's my fault for not seeing it sooner…_

Ron couldn't take it anymore. He bent his head to glare into her eyes. "Sweet thing? That…thing just attacked you, Hermione!"

"Oh don't be silly, Ron. Crookshanks would never hurt me," she said smiling into Crookshanks's orange and squashed face.

"Er…actually I think he did," Ron said pointing at her shirt which was torn all the way through revealing long scratches along her chest.

"Oh he was just excited. Weren't you, Crookshanks? Oh thank Merlin it was only you up here," she rubbed her face into the cat's furry back making Ron unexpectedly jealous. Then he saw her shoulders start to shake and realized she was crying.

"Hermione, what's wrong? Okay, you're right. It was only the bloody cat up here. He must have left the Burrow after we did and found his way here. He's smart, like you. Please don't cry," Ron said desperately rubbing his hand down her arm.

"I was so scared," she said hiccupping. "I still am. I'm scared that I'm so scared, Ron. It's not right."

"Why wouldn't it be right? Honestly…I was, too. But we're fine now. How about I check the other rooms and would you please, for all that is magic and holy, stay here with Crookshanks? I'll leave the door open and be really fast, yeah?" Hermione nodded her head this time not protesting. Ron helped her up and sat her on the bed. She was still holding Crookshanks against her chest. He walked to the closed door opening it to see a small, clean and most importantly empty, bathroom. He switched the light on, allowing a second of pride at finding and using the muggle device, and swiftly turned back around to face Hermione.

"I'll be right back. Will you be okay?"

She nodded her head and grimaced at him. Ron knew her back and leg was still sore and now she had fresh new scratches on her chest he needed to tend to. He smiled and gave her a quick kiss on her lips before leaving the room and bounding down the stairs. He grabbed their bags from the foyer and ran back upstairs to Hermione's room giving her the dittany so she can apply it to her cuts. After dropping their bags on the floor he made quick work of checking the rest of the bedrooms, bathrooms and closets on the second floor. He also found the door to the attic and climbed up quickly, careful of any signs of a trap. The attic looked more like an entire flat to him, not like the attic he had back at the Burrow that came complete with its own ghoul. He was once again taken aback at the sheer amount of space that was available for only three people. He didn't dare dream what a house like this would have meant for his childhood.

When he finally stepped back into Hermione's room he felt winded trying to catch his breath. "Buggering hell. This is a…big house," he panted then walked to the bed sitting down carefully as to not shift Hermione. She was sitting in the same spot on the bed where he left her with Crookshanks in her lap purring as she stroked its back. The cuts on her chest were healed and Ron was grateful for that at least.

"Did you see anything else? I didn't hear anything, but you would tell me if you found something, right? Any traces of dark magic or…or something strange like a red ball…I should go check," she went to move the heavy cat off her lap, but Ron took her hand and pulled her back down.

"I promise I didn't find anything. No red balls. Nothing. I reckon they found out no one was home and just rigged that explosion as an afterthought. I dunno, but there is nothing else that I found to be faulty in this place. There are way too many bathrooms though, but that could be a good thing," he finished, smiling at her. He grinned wider when she saw a trace of a smile on her face.

"I know. The house is a bit large, isn't it?" Hermione rolled her eyes and looked down at her fingers that were combing through Crookshanks's long ginger hairs.

"It is, but I love it. From what I can see as I tore through the place it's actually really warm and very…Granger-like," he finished lamely. Hermione let out a laugh then immediately hissed and closed her eyes in pain.

"Sorry," he said rubbing her shoulder. "How about you get a change of clothes since this one ripped it all up and I'll run you a bath?" Ron glared down at the sleeping cat silently sending it death threats.

"That sounds lovely. There should be some bath salts under the sink that you can add to the water," Hermione said and gently moved Crookshanks off of her. Ron helped her stand up and went to the bathroom while she grabbed a change of clothes from her bag.

She sat on the edge of tub watching Ron open the taps and fill the tub with water. He glanced over at her and smiled. She looked so peaceful in that moment as watched the bath salts that he just added dissolve into swirling water.

"Alright then, up with you. We can't have Hermione soup without the main ingredient, yeah?" he chuckled and helped her to her feet. She swatted his arm and winced.

"Ron! Don't make me laugh. It hurts, you know," she said with a tight smile.

"Sorry, but how is being salty going to help anyway?" he asked.

She rolled her eyes and made a moaning sound that he guessed substituted for laughter. He didn't want her in any more pain, but hearing her moan was doing things to his body that made him want to strip her down right there and shag her up against the sink. He knew that was not going to happen so he concentrated instead on easing her pain and worrying about his hormones later.

"It's not actually salt, Ron. It's just good for your skin and muscles. Helps them relax."

"Whatever you say, Hermione. Do you need help with your er…clothes? Taking them off I mean?" He didn't know why he was suddenly so nervous. They already seen each other's bits and shagged just yesterday. Maybe it was the fact that she was looking up at him with her big brown eyes looking like a small innocent looking doe who just wandered into a meadow while he felt like a randy wanker who wanted to grab her tits.

"Can you? I don't think I can raise my arms too high," she said relaxing her arms down at her sides waiting for him to disrobe her, trusting him to take care of her.

Ron reached out and ran his hands through her hair pushing it back over her shoulders. "Just relax and I'll be gentle," he said and noticed her bite her lip at his words. He took the bottom of her tattered top in both hands and slowly rolled it up her torso away from her back, over her head and down off her arms. She shook her hair back and Ron tried not to look down as he turned her around to unclasp her ripped bra sending it to the floor to join her top. He walked around to her front and slid her shorts and knickers down together not looking away from her face once. He noticed her cheeks turn red and her lips part as she breathed and moaned with every movement. He knew it was mostly from pain, but the lower half of his body didn't know the difference.

"Ron," she breathed and placed her hands on his shoulders as she stood there naked in front of him.

"Yeah," he whispered back feeling his own breath quicken. He stood up and brought his hands up to rest on her forearms not trusting himself to touch her anywhere else. "Hermione, I need to help you in the bath, alright?"

She dropped her hands and he saw a flash of disappointment in her eyes before she turned to the tub. He couldn't help but look at her backside as he helped her into the water and felt his jeans get considerably tighter. When she got settled in he turned to leave.

"Where are you going?" He heard a splash and turned back to see Hermione sitting up straight and staring at him with her breasts on display dripping with foamy water.

He mentally groaned and searched his head for an excuse. "I…I'm going to see about fixing up the kitchen. You should soak for a while so I wanted to get a head start on the clean up." His brief mental pat on the back for coming up with a valid explanation was thwarted when he saw her look down and frown.

"Oh…alright.," she said quietly and sat back in the water letting it cover her body like a wavy blanket up to her chin. "I might need your help getting out so don't take too long."

"Call if you need me," he said and placed her wand on the edge of the tub next to her head.

He grabbed his wand from the bed and made his way down to the kitchen. He didn't exactly want to leave her upstairs alone, but being in the same room with Hermione's wet naked body was not conducive to his mental state. He might as well do something productive with all that pent up energy so he went to work levitating and repairing the broken cabinets and chairs and table. He had no idea how the Grangers had arranged the dining furniture or island or appliances, but he did the best he could. He will ask Hermione what to do with the rest later. As he thought about Hermione he suddenly realized he didn't know how long he was down in the kitchen. He looked at his empty wrist and heard Hermione's voice in his head huffing at him to get his own watch. He swore under his breath as he ran from the kitchen and up the stairs to Hermione's room.

"Herm-" He halted in the doorway when he saw her laying on her side in the middle of her bed wearing denim shorts and a plain white tank. Her hair and clothes were wet as if she just stepped out of the bath and got dressed without drying. "You should have called for me. I would have helped you," he said walking towards her. She looked at him passively. "How are you feeling? Are the bruises better? Let me see," he said when she didn't answer and reached for the edge of her shirt. She pushed his hand away and shook her head.

"The bath was fine. I feel a lot better, so don't worry, okay?" she said shortly. He noticed her grimace when she moved. Why was she trying to hide her pain? Again?

"Hermione, I can tell it still hurts. Why won't you let me look at it?" he asked going to his knees on the floor and studying her face up close. He was taken aback when he saw tears streaming from her eyes.

"I'm…fine!" Hermione yelled and turned away from him to her other side. She spoke without looking back. "I know you would rather be somewhere else so just… find another room so you won't have to look at me, okay?" she said icily.

Ron jumped, surprised by her outburst. "I…I'm sorry. I just want to help."

He could see her shoulders shaking and when she didn't answer he put one knee on the bed then the other climbing up to kneel on the bed behind her. He had no idea what was actually going on or what he was doing, but she was no longer yelling so he took that as a good sign.

"Hermione, you need to tell me what is going on. Now," he spoke low, but firm. He was not going to accept that she was fine anymore. He didn't care how put out she felt.

'I said-"

"No," he interrupted and shook his head even though he knew she couldn't see him. "I know you're…angry at me for something, but there's more to it than that, isn't there?" he asked choosing his words carefully.

She sat up suddenly and turned to glare at him. Ron felt his body tingle in anticipation. A panic attack he could probably handle, but this felt very different to him. He's seen her angry before, many times having caused it, but he noticed a fear behind her eyes that was unnerving him. He stared at her carefully while she spoke. "You just…couldn't get away from me fast enough…could you? I saw how you…looked at me. Just like after…never mind." She stopped and looked away glaring down at her trembling hands and shoving them under her legs.

"No way in hell never mind. Spit it out. Looked at you after what?" Ron urged her to continue. He knew Hermione was good at masking her real emotions in order to spare others the trouble, but that wasn't how he operated. He dealt better when everything was out in the open. If he was going to help her overcome whatever it is that she was going through he needed full disclosure.

"After M-Malfoy Manor, okay?" she choked out, new tears falling from her eyes. "You looked at me like I was…broken. With pity. Then you couldn't stand to look at me. I…I was damaged to you," she slapped a shaking hand over her chest and gulped in a breath in order to speak again. He felt like he should stop her before she hyperventilated, but he sat back and listened not wanting her to stop since she was finally opening up to him. "I tried to put what happened to the back of my mind, but watching you the way you left the bathroom earlier, not wanting to be near me, all those memories are coming back. It was horrible in that place, Ron. I don't want to think about it. I can't!" she gasped in air and squeezed her eyes shut rocking back and forth. It was like she was physically back in time reliving that moment and it broke Ron's heart.

Ron sat stunned for a full second before rushing to her side and gathering her in his arms. He was aware he might be making her injuries worse, but he needed to hold her close, for her to feel his arms around her. He thought about what she said and the rising temper inside of him grew two fold.

"You're right. I couldn't look at you, but not because I didn't want to. When I looked at you all I could hear was you screaming while that fucking bitch tortured you and how I couldn't do anything to stop it. It wasn't on purpose that I was distant, but it was the only way I could focus without wanting rip my bloody hair out," Ron said and held on tighter letting the air from his lungs out slowly. Hermione continued to gasp and sob simultaneously into his neck while clutching onto the front of his shirt.

"I never want you to feel like I don't want you or that I pity you. I love you, remember?" he said hoping it was enough to convince her. He didn't trust himself to speak again and risk falling apart himself. He sat there running his hands up and down her arms firmly. She bent forward over his lap, her head on his knee and tucked her small form into his body. He smoothed his hands over her, anywhere he can reach while avoiding her injured back and leg.

"Hearing you scream my name is what helped me through it, Ron," he heard her whisper from his lap. He sighed with relief after hearing her speak. "And I don't blame you…I wouldn't want to look at me either. It didn't stop from making me feel awful, though. I didn't want you to look at me differently. Not when things were already so strained between us," she said as she sat up slowly and wiped at her eyes. "Sorry I lost it just now. My head just went back there and…it was all too much."

Ron took her face in his hands and swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat. "Do you want to talk about it? About what happened?"

"I don't really want to talk anymore. Can we just forget it?" she said quickly, extracting herself from his arms. He reluctantly let her go with a knot in his chest. He wanted to respect her wishes, but he was having a hard time not knowing for sure if she was alright, especially after such a tremendous outburst. He watched as she shimmied off the bed to stand shakily on the floor. He went to the edge of the bed and gently pulled her back down on his lap. She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Hermione…" he started to tell her something that had been weighing on his mind for the past week and didn't know how to tell her. He wanted to wait for the right moment, but after what just happened he knew he had to tell her.

"There's a takeout place around the corner and I have some muggle money. We could get something there and bring it back?" Hermione said lifting her head up. She gave him a look asking him to drop the subject and move on. He wished he could, but not just yet. He stared at her deciding the best way to start.

_She looks calm enough now. Do I tell her now or do I wait? I would like to keep my arse still attached to my body, but if I wait it's going to be too late and she'll really be angry at me. Might as well get it over with._

"That sounds great, love," he said hoping the endearment will soften her a bit. "But before we go I need to tell you something."

When all she did was look at him blankly he decided to just say it. "Remember the morning before we left for Australia, while I was upstairs getting my stuff?"

"As I recall you didn't get much of anything as you forgot half of your things," Hermione said with a smirk. He smiled feebly at her and cleared his throat.

"Right. Well I might have been distracted because I was actually sending an owl…to St. Mungos…for you…" he looked sideways at her to gauge her reaction. Her face turned from smiling to confusion then to a frown as she realized what he was saying.

"How-What…Why would you do that?" she said pushing away from him to stand with her hands on her hips. She tapped her foot waiting for him to answer. He opened his mouth to speak, but she interrupted. "You had no right! Didn't you trust me to do that on my own? I am not a child, Ron! I can take care of myself!"

"I know…but," Ron stuttered rising to his feet. "It's also my job to take care of you, isn't it? And you just finished telling me that you didn't want to talk about it. You just wanted to forget. I might not be as smart as you or as emotional, but I know when something is eating you up. I can't just sit around and wait for something worse to happen-"

"What do you think is going to happen, Ron?" Hermione yelled as she paced in front of him her limp less pronounced. "What could-"

"You could hurt yourself for one," Ron blurted out. She stopped mid-step and they stared at each other. He wasn't sure where that thought came from, but as soon as he said it he realized that it was a real fear he had in the back of his mind.

Hermione opened her mouth then closed it looking dumbfounded.

"I didn't mean-"

"Yes…you did," Hermione said slowly. She walked over to Ron and peered up at him. He sucked in his breath suddenly feeling incredibly vulnerable. "Why would you think such a terrible thing?" she asked softly without an ounce of anger in her voice.

"I don't know," Ron said looking away and sitting on the bed. "We've all been through so much, but as much as I try to be here for you I just feel like it's not enough sometimes. I've heard of bad things happening to people when they're not…well. Not to say you're not. It's just after your panic attacks and just now- I'm worried about you…mentally. Fucking hell. I don't know what's going on and it scares the shit out of me."

Hermione sat down next to him, their sides touching and took his hand in hers. "I'm sorry I scared you. I'm sorry I can't seem to handle myself as well as everyone else. I have no idea why, but…Ron, I really don't like that you went behind my back," she said in a low voice. He tilted his head to watch her as she spoke to their hands. "However, I think I know you well enough to say that you had good intentions. I also know how honest you are, which is why I reacted that way. This isn't like you, Ron."

"I know and I'm so-"

"Don't be sorry. I know you are, but please don't be. I'm not…well. I haven't been for a while. I feel awful for making you feel you had to do that. You're right. I didn't intend to see a Healer. I just didn't want to-"

"Don't say you're a burden. For fuck's sake don't even say it," Ron said squeezing her hand and shaking his head. The last thing he wanted was to make her feel guilty for feeling things she had no control over.

"Okay I won't say it, but I can't help feeling like it when all I seem to do is make you worry," she said and blew out a long breath. "Alright, I'll go. When is it for?"

He stared back at her, surprised by her change of tone. "Er… I'm not sure. I sent it asking for an appointment for sometime in mid-August. I wasn't sure how long we would be gone. There should be an answer when we get back. Do you mean it? You'll see a Healer? Are you sure?"

"Yes, I mean it this time. No more hiding, right? No more secrets?" she asked. He could see the sincerity in her eyes and smiled, grateful that they were once again able to talk things through and come out the other side still intact.

"I'm a lucky prat, aren't I?" he asked. They both nodded knowing what direction that conversation could have gone.

"And I just want to make it very clear that I would never, ever hurt myself. Ever. Okay?" Hermione said firmly looking into his eyes.

Ron nodded and leaned in to kiss her. They both sighed against each other's mouths and deepened the kiss feeling the other one's emotions through their lips and hands that were still clasped together. Hermione pulled away first and ran her hand through his hair.

"I love you, Hermione. I'm sorry I can't be better at this," he said then leaned his forehead against hers.

"Whatever you think you're supposed to be better at you already are," she said and brought her hands up to his neck, her thumbs circling his jaw. "I love you too much to stay angry at you, especially for doing something that came from your heart. I'm the one who should be sorry for garnering all this attention when you lost so much more than I did."

"We all did," Ron said and pulled her in an embrace. "Thank you for not hexing my bollocks off. I appreciate that," he said earnestly. Hermione's shoulders shook with laughter and she squeezed him tighter.

She sniffed the last of her tears away and cleared her throat. "You're insufferable sometimes, but I love you."

"I just want us to be good. Are we still good?"

Hermione pulled away and nodded up at him. This was enough to make him sigh with relief.

"Well I've had enough of all the dramatics for today, how about you?" Hermione said smoothing back her hair and putting on a smile. "Let's eat and get this house up and running so we can relax, yeah? I think I'm good enough to walk outside. There's a takeout place we can go to that's near here."

Ron grinned and kissed her temple before standing up, bringing her with him. "Brilliant, I'm starved. Let me use the muggle money this time. I need to practice," he said.

"As long as you don't say the word 'muggle' then you can do any transaction you want," Hermione said and grabbed her bag as they walked out of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will continue where this one left off, on the same night. You can make lemonade with the next chapter. Actually no. You can have a lemonade stand on the hottest day in Summer and make a killing with next chapter's lemons. It's THAT lemony.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me.

"Ron, what are you doing?" Hermione asked distractedly.

Ron was squatting on the floor and peered under the bed then crawled over to the desk searching under it. He got up from his spot on the floor and turned to Hermione who was looking at him strangely. She shook her head at him and yawned then went back to waving her wand around the room placing photos and posters back onto the walls and books into shelves from her bag. She changed the bed sheets into a light yellow and the curtains to a soft white before turning the bland white walls into large flowered print wallpaper.

"What does it look like? I'm making sure that bea- I mean that lovely furry little ball of…sunshine," Ron yanked open the bathroom door and turned on the light, "isn't lurking around here somewhere." Satisfied with the empty bedroom and bathroom he relaxed his shoulders and walked over to Hermione.

They were both finally finished unpacking her parents' things in their bedroom and office and, after eating again to stop Ron's whining, it was now evening and they were both exhausted from the emotionally and physically draining day. Hermione had insisted that Ron put the mysterious red ball deep inside his rucksack with the promise that he would take it straight to his dad as soon as they got back to the Borrow the next day. She wasn't settled, however, until Ron took the rucksack to sit outside in the garden far away from her bedroom.

She flicked her wand for a final time making several bins fly out of her bag and land neatly stacked inside the closet.

"Brilliant," Ron said looking around at her room feeling her essence in everything he laid eyes on right down to the copious amount of books bursting from the shelves to the photos, both muggle and magical, lined up on her walls and desk.

"Why do you hate Crookshanks so much?" Hermione pouted at him after dropping her wand to her side.

"You're not serious? That bloody cat has had it out for me since third year and you know it," Ron said imitating her pout. His face broke out in a grin when he saw her mouth quirk into a smile.

"You're just jealous because you're not the only red head I want to pet. Don't deny it," she said reaching out and ruffling his hair.

She was outright flirting and he found it so adorable he couldn't help but bend down and kiss her. He felt her smile against his lips and he pulled back to stare down at her affectionately. It hit him for about the hundredth time in the few months they've been together that she was actually his. He got the girl, right in front him laughing and touching him, kissing him. Not anyone else, but him. She was so beautiful and smart and he got to have her look at him like he was worth everything in the world. He hoped that feeling never went away.

"So you're not denying it then?" she asked bringing him back to reality.

He tucked her curls behind her ears and tugged at the ends of her hair. "What are we talking about again?"

Hermione laughed and he just gazed, watching the way her smile made her eyelids crinkle and her lashes intertwine.

_Were her eyes always this shiny and bright when she laughed before? How am I just noticing now? And her mouth, those lips are so soft and her nose is so…sexy? How can she make a nose look sexy? Merlin, now I'm getting turned on from a nose…_

"Ron, you're staring," he heard Hermione say and saw her cheeks redden.

"Sorry, did you say something?" Ron shook his head to clear his thought and the erection that was threatening to expand his pants.

"No, it's alright. I'm going to wash up and get ready for bed. Then you can do the same," she said before moving away from him to her bag and retrieving her things for a shower.

Ron grabbed her arm to stop her before she closed the bathroom door. "Was I a prat just now? Did I say something wrong?" he asked, worried. He didn't want a repeat of earlier and wondered why she suddenly walked away from him.

"No, of course not," Hermione said then paused to look into his eyes. "I promise I'm not upset. I was just overwhelmed. You were looking at me like that, like you were looking through and into me. Sorry that doesn't make sense. It was a lovely feeling, really. I just wanted to get ready so we can you know…go to bed. Do you know what I mean?" Hermione said the last part slowly while nodding her head at him and Ron cold feel something click in his brain.

"Oh," he said with a smirk. "So I did something right you're saying?"

Hermione rolled her eyes and pushed him into the room and out of the bathroom doorway. "If you let me finish I will let you know exactly what you did or didn't do that was so right."

Ron grinned at the closed door then flopped down on the bed waiting for Hermione to come out of the bathroom. The bed was so soft and with the sun already setting on the other side of the house it was already dark outside. It was a cloudy night so the moon was barely visible through the curtains. It was so quiet and peaceful and the steady pattering of water coming from Hermione's shower was lightly tapping on Ron's brain lulling him into a much needed rest. He felt his eyes flutter closed just as the door opened streaming light into the room. He sat up suddenly squinting at the doorway and nearly lost his breath.

"Whoa, what the bloody hell are you wearing?" Ron said out loud, looking at Hermione who was fidgeting in the doorway and leaning on the doorway with one foot scratching behind the other ankle nervously. He licked his lips as his eyes raked over her bare legs up to the hem of a very short light grey t-shirt. It was close fitting and dipped into a V-neck revealing a small cleavage. The thin fabric poked out where her nipples had turned hard and he could plainly see she wasn't wearing a bra. He could also see black knickers poking out the bottom as she shifted her legs and walked slowly to the bed. Her hair was hanging in damp ringlets down her back, some curls already dried and frizzy around her face. It was such a simple look and on anyone else he was sure they would look completely and utterly ordinary.

"It's only a shirt, Ron, and it's too warm for shorts. Do you mind?" Hermione said when she reached the bed and crossed her arms across her chest making her breasts push together making her cleavage deeper. Ron looked at her face and shook his head amazed at how clueless she was about the affect she had.

"Do I…No I don't mind, Hermione. Not one fucking bit as a matter of fact." Ron stood from the bed and stepped in close to her. She smelled as she always did before they went to Australia. Vanilla and peppermint. He felt her press against his side, her breasts sliding across his arm as she reached around him to grab his pajamas and pants from the bed and shoved them into his arms. She looked up at him through her lashes and bit her lip making him groan.

She looked him over slowly from his feet all the way to his eyes making him shiver. "Have a good shower," was all she said, but the way she said it and the look in her eyes made his ears turn red and his mouth go dry.

He grunted a response then backed up to the bathroom and quickly closed the door. He tried to clean up as fast as he could only making it take longer after dropping the soap many times and trying to avoid bumping his raging hard on in his haste. When he got out, almost slipping on the wet tiled floor, he dressed quickly in just pajama bottoms and pants, not bothering with a shirt and ran a towel through his hair. Brushing his teeth felt like it took hours, but he felt it was necessary not wanting to breathe like a dragon in Hermione's face. He felt himself getting excited; all exhaustion from before disappeared as he thought of the empty house and the beautiful girl that waited for him in the next room. He grinned at his reflection in the mirror and flexed the muscles in his arms and chest, deflating almost instantly at how he looked posing like a twat with his long arms and pale freckly skin.

"Relax, you wanker. It's just Hermione for fuck's sake," Ron said to his reflection not believing a word of it. It was the very fact that it was Hermione that was doing his head in. He was keen to show her how much he loved her and that she deserved better than a shag on a hard floor. Her parents were due to arrive the next day after which Ron and Hermione would return back to the Burrow with his over protective mum and cock blocking sister. This was his last chance to make things perfect before she went back to Hogwarts.

Ron stood up straight and smiled at himself again in the mirror telling the negative side of his brain to shut the fuck up. He stopped and cast a protective charm over his lower body as an afterthought. He smiled at his brilliant idea because now they wouldn't have to stop in the middle of anything and ruin the mood. With a hop in his step he turned off the light and opened the door to a dark room. The only light came from a blue flame inside a jam jar next to the bed flickering light onto a bare leg that was hanging over the side almost touching the floor.

"Hermione," Ron whispered. Thoughts of what he could do to please her and make her writhe kept flipping in his mind making him hard inside his pants. He grinned as he remembered the previous day and how it felt to be inside of her. He licked his lips in anticipation as he grew nearer to the bed.

"Hermione," he whispered loudly again now standing above her. His smiled dropped along with his erection when he saw that she was fast asleep. "Damn it, Hermione," he muttered.

Her body was sprawled out across the bed, her arms over her head and her legs spread out revealing the black knickers he only got a peek of just moments ago. He rolled his eyes and groaned at the sight mentally kicking himself for taking so long in the damn bathroom. She then let out a loud snore and smacked her lips. Ron couldn't help but chuckle then yawn himself as he laid his wand next to the illuminated jam jar.

He crawled carefully over her to the small space she left for him and brought the covers over both their bodies. When he did this Hermione turned towards him reaching out and wrapping a leg around one of his, her head searching for the space between his ear and shoulder. Ron looked down at Hermione's face eagerly, hoping she was awake, but sighed in frustration when he saw her eyes were still closed and her breathing was deep and slow once more. He stared at her soft mouth that was slightly open, her hot breath against his neck. Her features were so beautiful in the light of the blue fire that Ron couldn't take it anymore. He reached over her body for his wand and put the light out making the room pitch black. He smiled into the darkness as he pulled her closer and closed his eyes.

He was just starting to fall asleep when Hermione brought her knee up to press against his crotch.

"Bloody hell," he whispered in the dark. He carefully moved her knee away from him and turned on his side to face her. He didn't move his hand away from her knee, instead moving it up her leg to her thigh. He couldn't see a thing. He could only feel her soft skin under his hand, the heat coming off her small body mingling with his own under the thin sheet. In the dark, without the use of sight, his other senses seemed to be on overdrive as every breath seemed to sink into his skin, the parts of her touching him sending tiny balls of fire straight into his groin.

He knew he was torturing himself, but he couldn't help it. He wanted to touch her since the day before in her parents' office. He had been holding out, waiting until they were properly alone to make any kind of move. Now here he was fully awake and sporting the hardest erection known to wizardkind and Hermione was dead asleep. He carefully and ever so gently pulled on her leg, draping it over his hip and moved his body closer to hers, their hips touching. He could feel his hardness now against her hot center and froze.

_What the hell are you doing? How about you back the fuck up before she wakes up and hates you for being a perverted arsehole!_

He intended to pull away, but instead found himself gripping her thigh and pressing his lower body forward once again sliding his hardness against her through their clothes. He groaned out loud making Hermione stir and moan in her sleep. He felt her hair tickle his nose and her lips on his shoulder as she snuggled closer into him, one arm trapped beneath her and the other flopping around his waist to land on his bare back. Her touch sent shivers running down his spine and he felt his whole body jolt on contact.

Maybe it was the fact that it was so dark and the loss of sight made him more daring, but he suddenly was more willing to do things he probably wouldn't have the nerve to do if he could see himself doing it. As he brought his hand up to her hip and it met with smooth satin he told himself that she wore these fantastic knickers just for him.

"Mmm. Ron…" he heard Hermione mutter, her mouth opening and closing on his skin, wetting his shoulder with her tongue as she licked her lips.

"Hermione?" Ron whispered. Silence. Then he heard her soft snores again. Curiously, and with an added boldness that was sparked after hearing her moan his name in her sleep, he snaked both his hands around her waist, under her shirt. He smoothed his large hands over her careful not to touch the bruise that was still healing and back down to palm her arse over top of her knickers.

He felt her hum, the vibrations from her throat traveling through his body and landing in his crotch shaking up the fire that had already settled in. He wasn't sure how much more he could take and decided to try waking her again.

_She must have been sleeping for about fifteen, maybe twenty minutes, right? That's plenty of rest for now I think._

Ron took one hand and felt up her body to her face, holding her cheek and pulling back so he could whisper in her ear. "Hermione, wake up," he tried, getting only another sleepy hum as a response.

He paused, thinking about what he should do. As a perfect gentleman he knew he should back away and summon the most revolting images he could think of to bring his erection down and go to sleep. He knew that would not work so he fought internally about whether or not to get out of bed and relieve himself in the bathroom. Then he thought about having to come back to Hermione in bed, with her perfectly-shaped-made-for-him-only body, and threw that idea out immediately. He decided, his desire now having reached a fever pitch that it was threatening to release with or without him, to run with his new found confidence.

"Fuck it," he muttered to himself and bent his head down to find and kiss her on the lips, his mouth covering hers as she slept. He kissed her again as his arms wrapped around her waist. It was strange to kiss someone while they were sleeping, Ron found out. Hermione felt so loose, pliable in his arms and her mouth not moving against his was not something he was used to. He kissed her again, this time on her chin then her neck.

Suddenly he could feel her move against him; her head rolling back on the pillow making Ron hover halfway over her. Ron didn't want to stop his lips from traveling to her shoulder and kissing up her neck again as his left hand moved down to grip her hip.

"Am I dreaming?" he suddenly heard Hermione whisper. The cloud of ecstasy that was surrounding him, urging him to continue exploring suddenly dissipated, leaving him feeling like a pervert who just took advantage of his girlfriend without her consent. He froze, his brain whirring back to life as he tried thinking of any excuse for his hormone induced behavior.

"Ron," Hermione said her voice etched with sleepiness. He expected her to hit him or yell, but instead she was hugging him her arms encircling his neck and pulling him closer, wrapping her legs around his waist. He swore under his breath and responded by pressing his weight into her and dipping his head into her neck.

"Hermione, are you-are you awake?" he asked ready to jump off of her if she showed any signs of offense.

"You feel so good," she whispered dreamily and he felt her kiss his ear, both of her hands now stroking his bare back.

Ron prayed to Merlin that she was awake because if she continued talking that way, her voice sounding so tempting in the dark with her limbs wrapped around him, he would make sure she was wide awake regardless of consequences.

"Hermione I-" he started to say but was interrupted by her head turning, her face brushing against his cheek and her mouth covering his. She gave him a slow kiss and he could feel her smile against his lips. He smiled with her and kissed her back. They continued taking turns kissing each other using their tongues to tease and probe one another's mouths leisurely, taking their time as their hands roamed and explored under the covers in the dark. He found himself cupping her arse again, pulling her up as he pushed down. She arched her back making her chest rub against his.

"Do the spell," Hermione mumbled into his mouth.

"Taken care of," Ron mumbled back and took his hands from her bum around to the front pulling her shirt slowly up her body. He broke from the kiss for a second to throw the shirt over her head and bent down again to resume their long and gentle kissing, his hands covering her breasts and kneading the plump skin, her nipples hard in his palms. He was surprised at how relaxed he felt, content with their slow pace. He could feel every move she made underneath him. He could hear every sigh and moan that came out of her mouth.

Her hands pulled at his pajamas while he hooked his fingers in her knickers. Both of them, panting and breathing heavily into each other's face, made slow work of peeling off the other one's remaining clothing. Soon they were nude and pressing their bodies as close as they could. He kissed down her neck again going further down and suckling her breasts. He wanted to take his time and give her something to remember, something to hopefully overshadow the clumsy performance from the day before. He was running purely on instinct and desire, matching each touch and kiss with her moans and gasps.

His mouth reached her warm moist center between her legs and since he knew she couldn't see him he wasted no time latching onto her wet folds with his lips and using his tongue as a guide. He used his finger like the last time since he remembered she seemed to like that. It wasn't long before he had her pulling at his hair and squeezing her thighs against his ears. He continued as she shuddered and cried out only stopping when he felt her body melt away from his head.

Ron licked his lips and climbed up over Hermione wrapping his arms around her waist. His throbbing hard erection rested between her legs. Her body trembled again underneath him with the aftershock of her orgasm and he pulled her closer bucking his hips and sliding his hardness into her in one smooth thrust. He let out a long moan as he felt himself being encased inside of her.

"Ooooh," Hermione sighed loudly and pulled him down so his tall heavy body fully covered hers. He pulled out slowly then bucked his hips again sending his hardness even further into her.

"Oh fuck, that's brilliant. Fuck I love you," he moaned into her neck before kissing her soundly on the mouth. He started moving in and out of her taking his time feeling her walls tighten around him.

"Oh my god, Ron…This feels so good. I love you. So much... Don't stop, please," Hermione whispered as she gasped and sighed, their mouths only an inch away from the other. He couldn't see her face, only hear her whimper and feel her breath on his face. It was such a surreal feeling that he felt like he was in a trance. He was speechless, barely able to breathe, as he moved on top of her, their bodies moving together in an unspoken rhythm. He slid his hands up to her breasts and squeezed them lightly then down her sides to her waist and hips to her thighs and back up again. He could only use the memory of her to imagine what her body looked like under his large hands, soft and hard in all the right places.

Ron moved his lips to kiss her jaw and felt her wet cheek against his. He kissed the tears away and moved to the other cheek to do the same. His chest tightened and he felt such a strong surge of emotions that it threatened to overwhelm him. He continued moving inside her and fought to keep his own tears from falling.

"This is so…oh my god," Hermione hissed and dug her nails into his back. She arched her back off the bed and pulled him down hard with her feet against his bum. He assumed this meant she was ready to let go and started to move faster. Their pants and gasps mixed with the sound of sweaty skin slapping against each other were the only sounds in the room until Ron groaned loudly and suddenly grabbed Hermione's waist in his hands.

"Oh fuck! Shit...I'm gonna…" he moaned as the most intense orgasm he ever felt in his life built up inside of him. He slammed into her going deeper and faster then released with a shout, spilling into Hermione.

"Oh! Oh…Oh god…Ron!" Hermione cried out as he felt her second orgasm of the night clamp around his hardness. He pushed into her one last time before letting go of the last bit of tenseness in his body that was preventing him from crushing her and dropped down no longer able to be as courteous.

"Wow, Ron. That was...beautiful," Hermione rasped under him and ran her fingers up his back.

"You're fucking telling me," he breathed into her neck and chuckled feeling giddy all of a sudden. "Sorry, you're right. It was beautiful. You deserve beautiful," Ron said lifting his head and kissing her tenderly on the lips. Hermione laughed and kissed him back. She arched her back and pushed against him until he rolled onto his back, flopping his spent body onto the bed. Hermione wrapped one leg over his thigh and reached over to pull the sheet over them again.

"Wow. I'm never going to leave this bed," Ron said giggling. He felt so lazy and incredible that he was just fine with not ever moving again.

Hermione raised her head and placed a tender kiss on his neck before pulling his limp arms around her. "Then we won't," she said with a sigh. "We'll just lay here until we grow old. Or at least until one of us has to pee."

Ron laughed out loud his rumbling chest shaking Hermione's hair into his face. He blew it away then groaned. "Thanks, Hermione. Now I have to use the loo."

Hermione laughed as Ron rolled off the bed and made his way through the dark room towards where he hoped the toilet was. He found it and turned on the light. Momentarily blinded he quickly relieved himself and dragged himself back to the bed, climbing over Hermione who laid waiting for him. He pulled her close, tucking her body into his and resting his forehead against hers. He felt the exhaustion from earlier catch up to him.

"Ron, are you awake?" Hermione said as she played with his hair, pushing it off his forehead and letting it drop back down, the strands tickling his eyelashes. He smiled and nodded.

"Can I ask you something?"

Ron kept his eyes closed and nodded again.

"Did you see my knickers?" she asked quietly.

Ron snorted and nodded.

"Did you like them?"

Ron laughed quietly and leaned in to kiss her, his lips connecting with what he thought was the side of her nose. "I loved them. I love them better on the floor, where they belong."

Hermione laughed and rubbed her face into his neck. He was almost asleep when she spoke again.

"Ron?"

He groaned out loud and squeezed his hand that was on her hip. "Yes, love?"

"You were brilliant tonight. I forgive you for molesting me in my sleep," she said and he could hear her suppress a giggle.

"Er…yeah. Sorry about that. I blame the knickers," he said.

"I'm sure you do," Hermione said and placed small kisses on his neck and chin. "Ron?"

"Hermione," Ron said warningly.

"Sorry, I'm just not tired. It's your fault, you know."

"You weren't complaining," Ron muttered.

"Neither are you," she said as she climbed on top of him straddling is waist.

"Are you serious?" Ron said sleepily into the dark. She put one hand on his chest while the other reached back and felt for his now soft member.

"Help me feel tired, Ron. Please."

"You're mental," Ron said feeling himself harden almost instantly at her touch. She raised herself over him and the now familiar tightness and warmth surrounded him. "Oh fuck that feels good," he groaned.

"Just relax," she whispered and he felt her move up then back down along his length slowly at first then started to go faster.

"It feels even better like this the second time," Hermione panted as she moved faster slamming her hips down onto his. Ron held onto her arse cheeks kneading the flesh while lifting his hips up to meet hers. Their climax came much faster this time around and they ended up breathless and in a tangled mess of sheets and limbs.

"Oh fucking shit, you're killing me woman," Ron muttered breathlessly from under a cloud of curly hair.

"Thanks," Hermione said from on top of him and felt up his face to pat his cheek. He kissed her hand quickly and turned her around so he could hold her from behind. With the sheet untangled he covered them once again.

"Anytime," Ron said smiling into her hair. "You're a randy girl, aren't you? Should I get used to this?"

"I don't know, honestly," Hermione sighed then they chuckled, both delirious from exhaustion from the long day and even more arduous night.

He felt her relax and fit into his body, her hand over his which was cupping one breast. He settled down even further into the pillow behind Hermione and closed his eyes letting his own body relax and succumb to sleep.

"Ron?"

"Oh bloody hell woman. I love you, but-"

"Good night," she said snickering.

"Oh, you're funny," he said sleepily and yawned. "G'night, Hermione.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

His hands slid up her sides, fingers grazing the curves of her naked breasts on their way up to her face. She shivered, his breath on her ear. He whispered something, the words coming out husky and muffled as if they were breathing inside a tomb and running out of air. She blamed it on the insistent drumming inside her head, her fast heartbeat and the breath coming out of her mouth in short and raspy intervals as to why she couldn't make out actual words.

He reached her other ear, whispering again, his breath reaching inside her head and sending shivers straight through to her spine. Her entire body trembled violently under his hands and his intense stare. She looked into his bright blue eyes and forgot once more to ask what he just said.

When their lips were only a centimeter apart her breathing became ragged and shallow and it took all of her willpower not to close the gap. Instead she waited and watched as his eyes turned a darker shade of blue. She narrowed his eyes at him questioning his hesitation. She caught movement in his face as his cheeks popped up and his face split into a grin. She held her breath as his hands suddenly became tangled in her hair at the base of her neck.

"Ron?" she whispered. She didn't want to interrupt their moment, but she noticed something different in his eyes. He was smiling, but his eyes were somewhere else, vacant.

He leaned in further until she could feel his lips against hers, touching only briefly before he separated their connection and spoke in a low voice, his mouth brushing hers as he talked. She frowned and let out a breath slowly trying to reign in her frustration. Once again she could not make out his words, only hearing a murmur mixed in with the buzzing inside her head that was getting louder, almost like an echo inside a beehive.

"Ron, what did you say? I can't-"

The rest of her question was lost inside his mouth, trapped between his lips as his tongue wrapped around hers making her forget everything except his hands and his mouth. She kissed him back hungrily, careful to match his painstakingly slow pace.

He finally pulled back and stared down at her, not blinking. As she looked deeper she also noticed how much darker his eyes had become. Where before they were usually a bright blue they now seemed almost black. His eyebrows furrowed low almost touching his blonde lashes.

"What-What is it?" she asked. He opened his mouth and she saw his lips moving, but couldn't make out any sound. She closed her eyes and shook her head vigorously trying to rid herself of the deafening noise that had grown louder preventing her from hearing him properly.

"Ron-" she started to say and was startled when she could no longer hear her own voice. She continued, hoping that the same wasn't preventing him from hearing her as well.

"I can't hear you…Ron!"

She froze and looked at him in horror. His face suddenly looked panicked, his eyes darting around the room. When he looked back down at her she gasped at his alarmed expression. She felt his hands tighten and gather handfuls of her hair in his fists. She opened her eyes even wider and she cried out when he pulled at the hair toward her roots. He yanked down so hard her head snapped back making her neck arch away from the pillow. She yelped in pain and tears prickled her eyelids. Her hands left his hair and started pulling at his wrists.

She gasped as his mouth opened wide in a silent scream, his face contorted in agony. His eyes had turned completely black and she felt some of her hair being pulled out by the roots. Sounds rushed at her just then as her hearing came back at full force, her own screams suddenly echoed around the room.

"Ron, stop! You're hurting me! Ron!" she heard herself yelling and sobbing. Everything in front of her tilted and turned and she felt like she was going to be sick. Her entire body felt like it was beating from the hard pounding of her heart.

She was just about to reach for her wand when she noticed his face relax and his grip slackened from her hair. He looked momentarily dazed so she pushed his hands away from her and moved to sit up.

"Ron," she sobbed, tears falling down her face. "What… Ron!"

Before she could get away he suddenly pushed her on her back with his hands wrapped around her neck. She stared up at him, shocked and frightened out of her mind. His lips were pressed in a thin line and he was glaring at her menacingly. The grin on his face was back, only this time it had a sinister slant to it. His eyes remained black and she could swear she saw smoke coming from them, as if a fire was just put out and charred remains were left behind. He spoke again and she could finally hear him. The voice she heard was rather thick edged with a growl. She whimpered under his hands and clawed at his fingers clamped around her neck relentlessly.

"You're going to taste so good, mudblood," he growled. She desperately gulped in a breath and felt it get caught in her throat on the way down, tight against his thumbs.

"No. No no…"

He ran his tongue across her mouth silencing her. Then she felt his sharp teeth graze her bottom lip. She found it more difficult to take in a breath as his hands gripped tighter. She tried for her wand again and felt nothing but air. Completely panicked, she thrashed about on the bed kicking her legs and using her nails to dig into his fingers drawing blood. She saw the flaming red hair that she adored flopping over his eyes, his freckles standing out across his pale cheeks all blur right in front of her. His blood from her scratches dripped down her fingers as she tried screaming his name.

"Ron! Please…don't-" she choked out, her voice coming out garbled through her scratchy throat. Her plea faded out along with her attempts at dislodging his hands from around her neck. Lights popped in front of her eyes and her arms fell limply to her sides. In a last attempt she picked them up slowly and blinked, watching her blurry red stained hands push on his face, smearing blood on his pale cheeks.

"Keep still or I'll make it a lot worse, little girl," He sneered. She shuddered at his words and, even though her brain felt like it was being squeezed through a vacuum hose, she realized where she heard is voice before.

 _Greyback!_  She heard the name inside her head as she fought to remain conscious. She closed her eyes to the swirling images that swam in front of her eyes. In her dizzy state of mind she struggled to stay alive as random thoughts ran through.

 _If Greyback killed me then that would mean I can't become a werewolf, right?_ Then she wondered to herself if polyjuice potion worked on werewolves and knew she would have read it somewhere if they couldn't…

"Hermione," she heard someone say, but their voice was too far away. She felt herself shaking violently on the bed, her head and arms flailing around on the sheets and pillow as she felt strangled for breath.

"Hermione!"

She could hear him, the voice she knew and loved, absent of malice and hate. This was her Ron and he was close. Was this what it was like to be dead? Only darkness and hearing what you can't have? Or was Ron also dead? She couldn't bear it if he were, but at the same time wanted it to be true if only to hear him say her name one more time. She wanted to see him so badly her heart hurt. Her heart…that was still beating in her chest, rapidly.

There was more shaking and suddenly she was alive again. Her eyes popped open and she blinked into the dim lighted room. She was confused, disoriented and scared. This must be a trick. Greyback let her go only to play with her and finish the job as soon as she felt secure. Her hands flew to her neck and she took deep gulping breaths, gasping and choking on the spit that had collected inside her mouth from screaming.

"Hermione! Fucking hell! Are you okay?"

Her head whipped around to see Ron kneeling beside her. She stared at him, her eyes wide and heart thumping wildly as she tried to decipher what was real. There was a blue flame nearby that danced around the room. His eyes looked dark in the dim light and she caught a flicker inside of them. She felt the blood rushing through her veins until her brain snapped onto one thought.

_Run._

"No…no no no," muttered Hermione. She pushed him away from her, his head hitting the headboard as she scrambled to the edge of the bed ready to flee.

She heard him cry out in pain then felt strong arms encircle her waist and pull her back onto the bed.

"Let me go! I know who you are! Leave me alone!" screamed Hermione as she kicked her legs trying to get away. He gripped her shoulders to turn her around forcefully and shouted in her face.

"What the fuck, Hermione, relax! It's me, Ron! Look at me, dammit!" He lowered his voice and loosened his grip on her. "You had a nightmare. Scared the piss out of me, but that's it."

She looked around the room searching for something that she could no longer remember needing to find. Her head felt like it weighed a ton and her throat was scratchy and dry.

"Oh…" she mumbled coming back to her senses. "Was I screaming? My throat hurts."

Ron sighed heavily and dropped his hands from her shoulders then sat back on the bed covering his face with his hands. Her nightmare and what just happened suddenly came back to her. It felt so incredibly real, not like anything she had ever experienced before in her life. Even when she was alone her nightmares were never that bad and she never woke up in a panic. Hermione also never would have thought she'd ever dream that Ron would hurt her. She shivered and pulled the sheet up to her chest as she remembered Greyback's voice coming out of Ron's mouth. She wished she could go back to a moment ago when she had no idea what happened.

"Wow that was intense," she muttered shaking her head and looked at Ron who still had his face in his hands. "Ron, I-"

"Are you okay?" he whispered, dropping his hands and peering at her.

She paused, wanting to ask him the same question, but figured it was better to ease his mind first.

"Oh yes, I'm fine. It was just a nightmare like you said. It's cold in here…" said Hermione as a chill ran down her back an arms, suddenly realizing how naked she was.

Ron quickly reached down to the floor and handed her the grey shirt she had worn to sleep. "Tell me what you were dreaming about," he said as she dropped the sheet and slipped the night shirt over her head. She watched as he yanked his pants on and sat back waiting for her to speak.

"Hermione, who did you think I was before, when you first woke up?" asked Ron when she didn't say anything. "You were looking at me like I was going to murder you or something," he said and took her hand then reached out with his other hand toward her face. She pulled back reflexively and instantly regretted it, closing her eyes at his shocked expression.

"Sorry, that was…not what you think. I'm just a bit jumpy," said Hermione. She looked down at their joined hands, half expecting it to be covered in blood. She sighed in relief to see his hand as freckly and large as ever.

"Bollocks," said Ron. She looked up, startled by the sharp tone in his voice. "You're scared of me and it's fucking with my head."

Hermione sighed and said quietly, "In the dream you  _were_  trying to kill me. We were on the bed and then your eyes…they turned so dark and cold and then your hands…they were…" She reached up with her free hand and it trembled as it touched her neck.

"But it wasn't me, was it?" asked Ron his voice wavering.

Hermione shook her head and closed her eyes hearing that low growl of a voice in her head. She looked at Ron-her Ron-and forced herself to believe that this was real, not her nightmare. The real Ron was sitting in front of her never wanting to hurt her for the world.

"No, it wasn't you. I mean it looked like you, but it wasn't. And your voice was different. It was that werewolf…Greyback,"

"Blimey," said Ron then blew out a long breath. "That explains why you tried to do a runner. You know they caught him, right? You were there when Dad told us. He can't hurt you, Hermione. I wouldn't let him. I would-"

"I know," said Hermione, not wanting him to finish that sentence. She didn't need to hear it to know what he would do or what might happen if he were to protect her. "While Bellatrix had me under Crucio I remember her promising him that he can have me," Hermione shivered involuntarily at the memory. "I remember being more scared of that than being tortured…"

"Yeah, I remember that, too. Fucking evil bastards," Ron muttered and pulled her into his body and wrapped his arms around her. She breathed his scent in and clutched at the front of his shirt, willing herself not to cry. Smelling his familiar scent made her dizzy with relief.

"It was like I couldn't wake up. I heard you in the end and I thought…I was dead. That we both were. Then I had to go and flip out…Is your head alright?" asked Hermione.

Ron was silent for a few moments before she felt his arms tighten around her. "What? Er…I dunno. I don't know what to say," He sighed and dropped his chin on to her head.

Hermione pulled back to look at his face and frowned at his pained expression. He clearly did not hear what she just asked him. "What's the matter, Ron?"

Ron shrugged and looked down. "It's nothing. I'm just glad you don't want to run away from me anymore. That was…weird," He said and shrugged again not meeting her eyes.

"Right…that was more than weird. I'm sorry I worried you, but I promise I'm fine now. See?" she said and gripped the sides of his face and kissed him tenderly on the lips. She smiled at the familiar taste and feel of his mouth, so unlike her dream turned nightmare.

"Yeah," Ron muttered and pulled back shaking his head and prying her hands from his face. "Thanks. I just…have to use the loo. Be right back," He smiled thinly at her and slid off the bed.

"Ron, what's wrong?"

He didn't answer and instead walked briskly to the bathroom and closed the door.

Hermione sat on the bed; unmoving and feeling suddenly empty.

_What was that about? Is he upset with me because I had a nightmare? That I pushed him away? I can't control what my subconscious decides to throw at me while I'm sleeping! He was the one who insisted we talk about Malfoy Manor last night and here I have to apologize for it. I don't very well think so!_

Hermione angrily kicked the sheets off of her legs and slid off of the bed, stomping to the floor with a thump. She turned and glanced at the light coming from under the bathroom door. She felt her stomach drop as she fought back tears once again.

_Maybe he's had enough of this? It had to happen at some point. Who wants to be with someone who cries and panics all the time over every little thing? I don't blame him for needing to get away from me. I don't even want to be around myself half the time._

Depressed, Hermione sank down on the edge of the bed and stared numbly at the jar of blue flames on the bedside table. The magical fire wasn't as bright as it had been when she first awoke as the morning sun was starting to lighten the sky outside her window. She thought about how, just hours earlier, she had woken up to complete darkness with Ron's lips on hers and his hands on her skin. She touched her fingertips to her bottom lip and closed her eyes. It was dark once again behind her eyelids as she recalled his slow and gentle touches as he moved over her…inside of her. Her heart flipped over inside her chest at the thought of never feeling that again flashed in her mind.

Hermione heard water running and opened her eyes to peer at the sliver of light from the bathroom again. She wondered if he was in there thinking of ways to let her down easy. She imagined him telling her that it was too difficult; too much work to be with her anymore. She knew he loved her, but she was smart enough to know that sometimes love wasn't enough. She let her mind race with all the ways she would have to figure out how to live without him. She thought about him moving on with someone else and her being left alone. She never thought she would be the type of girl to pine for anyone. She prided herself on her independence, but love was doing strange things to her. Having love returned just made it worse when it gets pulled away.

Hermione shook herself and put her head in her hands.  _What are you thinking? Pull it together. You have no idea why he's even in there. He probably just had to pee and you're assuming he wants to break it off with you? Goodness, I'm losing my mind…What was that?_

She lifted her head suddenly as a new sound came from the bathroom. The water was still running, which was odd, but she also heard a sort of choking sound as well. She searched for her knickers and pulled them on hastily then tip toed to the closed door and listened. She heard a low moan then a hiss and backed up quickly.

 _Is he…wanking? Now?_  She felt a sudden rage hit her wall of self deprecation and yanked the door open without introduction. What she saw made her stop dead in her tracks and her eyes widened in shock.

Ron was standing in front of the sink, his back to her as the running water came straight out of the faucet into the drain without interruption. He was bent over the counter; his hands gripped the edge turning his knuckles white. He wasn't moving except the muscles in his arms were shaking and his back was trembling.

"Ron, are you alright?" she asked softly. She saw him flinch at her voice as if she startled him then he cleared his throat.

"Hermione," Ron said then moved his hands quickly under the water to splash some on his face. He turned off the water and finally turned around to face her. "Sorry I was…er, I was just-Fuck." He broke off and screwed up his face and turned away from her to face the shower.

Hermione was stunned. After a few seconds of gaping at his back she finally walked over to stand in front of him. His face was wet with a mixture of tears and water.

"Ron, talk to me, please," said Hermione softly, feeling her heart in her throat. She swallowed to keep herself from joining him. She had to figure out what was going on before she let herself give in to the panic that was simmering in her chest. She moved closer to him and gently wiped his face with her hands. She saw such sadness in his usually bright and joyful eyes that it pulled at her heart. He took a deep breath and covered her hands with his. She was afraid he would take them off the same way he did before, but he just held them tighter against his cheeks.

"I-" he said and dropped his head lower to lean his forehead on hers. "I can't believe I lost it like that. I feel like such a tit."

"Don't say that," Hermione said as she smoothed her hands over his neck. "Just tell me what happened. Was it me? Am I too much to deal with? You can tell me. I'll understand if you want to end things…"

She dropped her hands as Ron backed away from her looking at her incredulously. "Are you mad? What the hell made you think that?" He rubbed his hands roughly over his face then through his hair, shaking his head at her.

"I just thought- with the way you left the bed…never mind." Now that she knew he wasn't thinking about chucking her she felt silly for even allowing herself to believe such a thing.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Hermione asked and reached out to take his hand. He looked at her curiously then shook his head.

"No, I reckon I'm fine now. As long as you're okay then I'm fine," he sniffed and smiled at her.

She stared at him, fixing him with a look that she knew he would understand. "How many times have I given you that same answer and you never let me get away with it? Out with it, Ron."

"Okay," he sighed and closed the toilet sitting on the lid. "I want to talk about this, but I don't want to upset you. Promise me that you won't get mad and ask a million questions about feelings and all that rubbish."

Hermione grabbed a towel from a shelf and threw it on the floor in front of him and sank to her knees on top of it. Resting her elbows on his thighs she grabbed his hands and said, "Not get upset? How can I possibly promise something like that? And feelings are not rubbish, Ron. Especially, not yours! This whole thing is based on emotions and feelings. Your request is just not reasonable."

"Hermione, you know what I mean. I can't stand talking about this stuff. I might muck it all up and get it all wrong."

"You talk about it with me when I'm being overly emotional and a blubbering mess, don't you? Why can't I help you when you're obviously very upset?" She grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her. "Sorry, Ron, but you need to accept that I'm here and I will do and say what I think you need to get better. It's the least I can do after everything you've done for me. We're friends first, remember?"

"Best friends," Ron said smiling at her. She smiled back in relief.

"Okay, I promise I will not be upset," Hermione said finally with a sigh. She looked into his eyes and could still see the sadness behind them. "Were you… thinking about Fred?" She didn't know what made her say it, but when Ron looked to the side she knew she must have hit on something. "I know you're always thinking about him, but what was it about tonight that made you so upset? And why would that offend me?"

After a few moments he finally looked up at her and she held her breath. His eyes were shiny again, but no tears fell. "When you mentioned Greyback I was thinking about what they did to you and what he wanted to do with you and it made me feel so angry that I couldn't help you sooner. That I couldn't stop it, you know? Then it was like my mind shifted to Hogwarts. You know, before that wall fell on us? And I was right there when it happened…I was right there and couldn't do a damn thing to help him, either."

His hand squeezed hers tight and Hermione could feel his fingers dig into her flesh. She ignored it and instead ran her other hand down his arm soothingly. Hermione wanted to say so many things to reassure him, but she sat silently biting her tongue waiting for him to continue.

He looked up into her eyes and said, "It all happened so fast and next thing I know…no more Fred. Then I thought about how glad I was that you were alive and that I at least got to you before you died. I couldn't help Fred, but I could help you." He frowned and looked back down shaking his head. "Then I thought well… that was only because you were being tortured so you had longer to hang on and I was…glad about that. What kind of sick twisted mind thinks like that?" he whispered harshly, his hand squeezing hers even tighter making her hiss in pain.

"Sorry," Ron muttered and withdrew his hand from hers to cover his face.

"No, it's alright," Hermione whispered and rubbed her hands together to get the blood flowing again in her fingers. Her mind was reeling from what he just told her. She could understand now why he hesitated to tell her.

"You're not angry?" Ron asked. He looked stricken with guilt as he gazed at her unblinking.

"I…don't know what to say, honestly," said Hermione, still stunned. "I know that you are not sick or twisted. I can tell you that for a fact," she said firmly. "I think I understand what you're trying to say. I know how lucky I am that I didn't die that day. I know that's only because I was tortured and of course because you and Harry came in when you did. And Dobby…" She took a deep breath and forced herself to push aside those memories. "No, Ron. What I'm upset about is how you feel guilty about Fred's death. Ron, you know there was nothing anyone could do. The killing curse is so fast that had you done something…who's to say you wouldn't have died instead? Or along with him?" She shuddered at the thought and cursed inwardly when she felt a tear slide down her face. She was thankful that he was not looking at her then, but at a spot somewhere on her shirt. He looked like he had more to say so she took the opportunity to discreetly wipe at her face quickly and tried desperately to hang on just a bit longer.

"You know, I've been avoiding talking about anything like this with my family…especially George. Does that make me a terrible person?" he asked looking at Hermione as if her answer meant more to him than anything.

She brushed his hair away from his forehead and said, "Of course not. I'm not an expert on how all this works, but I think everyone grieves in their own way. George hasn't been around and maybe that's his way of dealing. Did you want to try seeing him and talking to him? It might help both of you, you know."

He looked thoughtful for a moment then sat up straight. "Yeah, you're right. Mum goes to his flat bringing him food and making sure he's alright. Dad, too. I know Bill and Charlie have taken him out and Percy…What is wrong with me?" he asked shaking his head. "I've been so busy trying to forget and move on and they all probably think I'm the biggest prat."

"Do you think maybe…I'm distracting you from your family? With all my, you know, issues?" Hermione asked quietly. She hated thinking it and even more saying it, but it was a thought that has haunted her for a while.

"No, Hermione," Ron said without hesitation. He buried his hands in her hair, his fingers rubbing her scalp behind her ears. The look in his eyes was so intense that she felt her breath catch in throat and stared at him wide-eyed. "You are the best thing in my life right now. I love my family and Harry, but you…you're everything else. I don't know how to explain it, but no. If you're a distraction then it's the best kind, I promise." She should have felt relieved, but she knew there will always be a part of her that felt guilty for taking so much of his attention away, not only from his family, but from his own grief.

"And I want you to promise me that you will follow your own advice and talk to me no matter what. No more running to the loo, alright?" Hermione pointed her finger at his chest.

"Sorted," Ron said brushing his fingers through her long curls.

"Do you want me to go with you when you see George?" Hermione asked trailing her fingers along his forearms.

"No, I reckon it might be better if I went alone at first. I'm sure he would love to see you, though. Who wouldn't?" He smiled and tugged on a curl. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm still shaken up honestly, but it was only a dream. A very realistic and horrible one, but hopefully it was the last for a long time. Anyway, I'm proud of you and I'm glad you told me how you felt. I know that was hard for you," Hermione said and leaned forward to kiss him lightly on the lips. "Do you feel a little better now?"

Ron nodded and said, "I'll always believe that there must have been something more I could have done, for both of you." Hermione went to speak, but Ron cut her off and said, "It does feel better not to have it all inside my head. It felt good to dump it on you…Sorry." He shrugged and looked at her sheepishly.

Hermione smiled and shook her head at his blatant honesty, something she was learning to appreciate more every day. "Well, I don't believe that and neither should you, but I understand it. And don't ever feel bad about dumping anything on me. I know I may not be as…strong as I used to be, but I will get better. I already am I think…"

"I think you're doing great, Hermione, honestly. After a nightmare like that I expected you to have another one of those attacks, but you didn't," Ron said and slid his hands over her shoulders and down her arms.

They sat there like that staring at one another in comfortable silence until Ron looked toward the open door into her bedroom.

"It it morning already?" he asked. Hermione turned her head to follow where he was looking. The sun, now fully raised, was beaming its rays through the curtains on her large windows brightening her room in a warm yellow glow.

"It most certainly is," Hermione said and stood up from her spot on the floor stretching her arms over her head then bending down to rub her red knees. "We should get ready and eat something so-Whoa!" Hermione exclaimed and placed her hands on Ron's shoulders as he suddenly pulled her to him by her waist. She landed on his lap and could feel him hard under her knickers. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like?" he said and smoothed his hands down her legs and back up again across her bum to her back, sliding his hands under her shirt again. This time Hermione did moan and moved her hips once over him making him groan.

"Seriously, Ron," she said closing her eyes and breathing through her nose, "After all that? Besides, aren't you hungry?"

"Yeah…but it can wait I reckon. Come on," Ron said and carried her out of the bathroom and onto her bed.

"I suppose nourishment can wait…" Hermione whispered from underneath him. She smiled when Ron had wrapped his arms around her waist and shifted on top of her letting the weight of his body settle on top of hers. She heard him sigh before he rested his head on her chest. She looked down at him and felt tears well up in her eyes, this time for a good reason.

"Oh, Ron," Hermione said and suddenly she couldn't stop talking. "I love you so much. Thank you," she murmured and hugged him closer, "for being so wonderful and honest. You're my best friend and you drive me nuts. You're everything I'm not. You barely ever say the right thing, but when you do it's perfect. You love me and I can feel it so much right now it's scary, but right and…I feel like my heart is going to crush from the weight of it. You frustrate me and you swear too much and you're too tall and your temper is-"

"Oi!" Ron interrupted and pulled back from her.

"What?" Hermione asked and picked her head up to kiss him, but Ron put his hand over her face and pushed it back gently.

"Ron!" Hermione yelled; her voice muffled behind his palm. She pushed it away and glared at him. "Don't tell me you don't want me right now."

She saw his cheeks redden at her words, but she wasn't about to find it adorable just yet.

"Well how can I when you're going on about how I'm too tall and I drive you nuts and all that rubbish?" he retorted indignantly. She rolled her eyes at him as if he were a child.

"Ron did you not hear anything else I said? Like the part about you loving me?" Hermione caressed his cheek. "Or how perfect you are?" She ran her hands through his hair teasing the back of his neck.

"Only when I'm not saying the  _wrong_  thing," he muttered grumpily, but she could see a hint of a smile on his lips.

"And," Hermione said then trailed her fingers down his chest, "all those other not so great things, if you would have let me finish, I would have said how much I love them too. Everything about you is mine; the good and the bad. I love every single part of you," she finished. She saw him grin and lower his eyes and before he could say anything she said, "Now say some things about me."

"What?" Ron asked looking up from her chest and blinking at her. "Oh right, you're brilliant," he mumbled and moved in, his lips pursed ready to kiss her.

"Oh no," Hermione said and pushed his face away more roughly than he did to her. "I said some things, not something. Just be honest. I can take it."

Ron rolled his eyes and rolled to her side playing with the hem of her shirt and glaring at it as if trying to will it off of her with just his mind. "Alright, fine. Let's see…what bugs me about you? Does the fact that you're not starkers count?"

Hermione smacked his arm and laughed. "No! And think of other things besides what bugs you!"

"Well now I feel like I'm being put on the spot, Hermione," he whined. "It's not going to be sincere if I say stuff like 'Oh your hair is nice, but you read too much.' See? It just sounds forced."

"First of all my hair is atrocious and second one can never read too much. It's all a matter of how one prefers to spend their free time. I happen to like to read. I could say you…play quidditch too much," Hermione said now crossing her arms.

"Hermione, I love your hair, honestly. And alright, I will admit I find your passion for reading those barmy things called books is sort of charming, but never ever say I play quidditch too much. Would you say the same thing to Harry? Because if I play too much then Harry is right obsessed," Ron said and sat up to mimick her, crossing his arms and smirking at her.

"Well…" Hermione said and looked down and to the side thinking of a smart retort. "Oh bugger! Look, I'll relent on the quidditch if you admit that reading can be fun." Hermione raised her eyebrows and stared smugly at him.

"I'm sorry, but I'm an honest bloke and if I said something like that I might tarnish my reputation. You wouldn't want that would you?"

"Alright," Hermione huffed. She knew they were behaving childish, but she found she didn't care one bit. She was enjoying the fact that Ron was smiling again and wanted to relieve some of the stress from their terrible morning. "How about this…think of three good and three bad things about me."

Ron looked at her like she was off her rocker and said, "Why?"

"Just do it!" Hermione said smacking her hands down on the bed. The movement caused her to bounce and she noticed Ron's eyes dart to her chest as her breasts moved under her shirt.

"Hermione, there are about a hundred things I would love to do right now and listing stuff is not one of them."

She pushed herself up to sit and just stared at him.

"Urgh, fine!" Ron exclaimed and grimaced while he adjusted his crotch. Hermione blushed and leaned back with her hands behind her. She saw him glare at her in this new position, but she just raised her brow and gave him a look.

"You are," Ron started to say while cracking his knuckles. He started raking his eyes over her body shamelessly as he spoke, "smart and beautiful and…no squash that. You're a genius and fucking gorgeous, Hermione and…a third thing…"

"Don't hurt yourself," Hermione said flatly. She wasn't sure if she should feel offended or amused that he was stuck at only two good things he could think about her.

"I would say funny, but that was just hurtful," Ron said and playfully pinched her knee. "Oh I know…your loyalty. You're a great friend and…how you love everyone. Not just me because well, that's a given-" Hermione lightly kicked his knee and shook her head at him. "I love how you're willing to do anything to help someone. Not just when you did our homework, sorry  _helped_  us with homework, but the way you helped Harry all these years, especially this past one…you're amazing."

Her heart warmed along with her cheeks and she smiled back at him. "You helped too, you know. He would have never been able to do all those things without the both of us," she said.

Ron laughed and said, "Don't tell him that, though."

"I'm sure he's aware of that fact," Hermione nodded. "You're not finished, Ron."

"Oh come on, Hermione. I did so well just then, didn't I? Don't set me up to piss all over a great moment," he groaned.

"I won't get mad, I promise."

"You almost ripped my head off for saying you read too much and that was a hypothetical answer!" Ron paused and looked up to the ceiling. "For the love of all that is magic I will never understand you women."

"You're not supposed to. Now finish, please," Hermione said trying to look reassuring. She tried not to laugh as he looked at her as if he didn't believe her.

"Alright, bad things…you're…pushy, stubborn and very persistent…," he said quickly then reached down to tug on the hem of her shirt. "Now get over here before my dick falls off."

"Ron! That's vile," Hermione said slapping his hand away then paused to think about what he just said. "Stubborn I'll give you, but persistent and pushy? I suppose I can be a bit pushy if I think I'm right, but isn't that the same as stubborn really? And persistent can go along with that same line of thought if you think about it. So…actually all you did was take one idea and spread it out over three." She peered at him thoughtfully and smiled at his sheepish expression. "You're a lot smarter than people think, Ron Weasley." Hermione always knew Ron was brilliant even when he doesn't try as hard to show it to everyone. She knew it because it was one of the things that attracted her to him the most. Whenever he let his intelligence show it made Hermione's stomach flip and she wanted nothing more than to throw him down and have her way with him.

"I have my moments," said Ron smugly.

Before she could answer his mouth was on hers, forcing her back on the bed as he crawled over her, covering her with the length of his body. She grabbed his face with both hands and pulled him roughly away from her face.

"That was so hot," she whispered against his lips. She looked into his bright blue eyes and forced the sudden image of smoking black eyes from her mind immediately. Nothing was going to ruin this moment if she could help it.

"I was thinking," Ron said with a twinkle in his eye, "maybe later I can borrow a book from you. You know, for some light reading?"

"I know you're taking the piss, but that was so sexy. Say something else."

"Er…I'll write a ten page essay on the History of Magic…" he whispered in her ear as he started stroking her sides with his fingertips.

Hermione frowned and looked over at him. She couldn't help but let out a snort and roll her eyes despite how turned on she was.

"Alright, shut up now."

"That was really lame, wasn't it?" Ron asked and rolled them over so she was on top.

"Yeah it sort of was, but I love you for it anyway," Hermione said and kissed his neck. His large hands roamed over her body bunching her shirt up in places making gooseflesh pop up on her skin.

She moved lower to kiss his bare chest, her mouth covering his nipple and taking it between her teeth and pulling. When Ron suddenly made a gasping noise she let go and looked up through her frizzy hair at him.

"Sorry, was that weird?" she asked.

Ron grinned down at her. "A little…I liked it."

Hermione shrugged and moved to the other nipple to repeat what she did to the other one eliciting the same response. She grinned and kissed her way back to the center of his chest. She could feel him suck in a breath as her lips moved even lower. She was kissing around his belly button when she heard Ron clear his throat.

"Her-Hermione, are you going to…you know…put your mouth-"

"Do you want me to?" Hermione said lifting her head knowing immediately what he was trying to ask. She shook her hair out of her eyes and looked up at Ron anxiously.

_It's only fair, though, isn't it? That I return the favor? But I might be terrible at it. I've read about it, but just being asked is making me nervous let alone actually doing it. And what happens when he…releases? Am I supposed to catch it with my hand or my mouth? Gross._

She must have had a weird look on her face because Ron started talking very fast. "Oh you don't have to! I was just wondering where you were headed. Er, I mean you're awfully close to it and it would be bloody brilliant, but I don't want you to do something you're not comfortable with. When you're ready or never if that's what you want. I don't need you to do it."

Hermione stared at him as he talked, his face turning beet red. She could feel him hard under her chest and sat back on her heels to look down at his crotch. His erection was now standing up straining against his pants. She heard Ron moan and looked up at him. He was looking at her in a way that made her want to melt, but she was too nervous to let it affect her as it usually does.

"Do you…want me to do it?" she asked and bit her lip.

"Yes," he answered immediately then said, "but only if you do. No pressure."

She stared at his wide eyes and then back down to his tented pants. She took a deep breath and took hold of the edge of his pants and slowly pulled them down and off his legs. She sat up again and looked down at him, leaning in close to study it from all angles. She only touched it that one time in Australia, but what happened that day was so quick so it was only for a moment that she got a real look at it.

Hermione glanced back up at Ron's face and found him staring intently at her and could tell he was holding his breath.

"Will you tell me what to do? I read that it could be very painful if one were to handle it improperly."

Ron breathed out a laugh which baffled Hermione, but she smiled at him anyway. "Right," Ron said and reached down to grab hold of himself. "You just sort of do this…"

She watched with wide eyes as he started to stroke it up and down slowly right in front of her.

"And, well, a good grip is nice and…try not to rub too hard when it's dry and…the rest I don't know since well…I never had anyone else use their mouth…"

Hermione looked up at his reddened face and smiled at him. He shrugged and continued to squeeze and pull. "You can use this stuff to sort of get it…wet and it's…easier. Fuck this is bizarre," he finished and let go and looked away from her.

"No, please," Hermione said reassuringly, "I appreciate it, really. So you just do this, then?" She wrapped her hand around the base of his erection and frowned when her hand didn't reach all the way around like Ron's did. She shifted herself closer and raised her other hand to join in letting them both slide together. It was already slick from what Hermione already knew was precum and thought to herself how slippery it actually was in real life.

"Fucking hell, that feels so good," she heard Ron mutter and beamed up at him proudly. He chuckled at her and she continued to move her hands up and down. She took a deep breath and with one last glace at Ron's bewildered face she bent her head down to use her tongue, licking up the side and over the top of his erection.

"Oh fucking fuckery fuck," Ron moaned then she felt her hair being lifted as he piled it in his hands moving it out of the way. She took a deep breath and decided to, as they say, dive in head first. Her mouth covered him only halfway, but already she felt full.

"Oh, and don't bite!" she heard Ron say suddenly. She rolled her eyes at him as if to say she already knew that. Really, isn't that just common sense?

She moved her head up and down to mimic her hands, sucking and licking experimentally. She kept peeking up at him as she moved over him to gauge his reactions and found out quickly that it didn't really matter what kind of technique she had or lack thereof. He seemed to be extremely content with the view and the feeling of her mouth on him.

"Tighter, Hermione. Faster. Fuck that's good…so fucking good," Ron muttered, his hands still in her hair. She felt her hair being pulled suddenly and a flash of her nightmare came to the front of her mind for a second.

"Shit! No teeth!" Ron yelled suddenly and Hermione pulled away quickly.

"Sorry! I…I'm sorry. I didn't know I did it. Does it hurt?" she said quickly, looking at him nervously. His face softened and he shook his head at once.

"No…no it doesn't hurt," Ron breathed out. His face was sweaty so he disentangled his hand from her hair and wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. "You barely touched it, but I felt something and I panicked. It's fine. I promise. You're amazing. Brilliant, honestly."

Hermione sighed with relief and smiled at him. "Shall I continue?"

"Oh god, please," Ron said and they both laughed.

Hermione bent over once again, a little more awkwardly this time as she was hesitant not to let her teeth touch any part of him. She sank her mouth onto him again and closed her eyes concentrating on the task at hand. She listened to Ron's breathing and swearing as she moved faster ignoring the slight pain in her jaw.

"Unggh Hermione…I'm gonna…It's coming," he said panting. "Oh god…Hermione…off…now!" he yelled and she felt him pull back on her head. She let him go with a pop and watched as he grabbed himself, stroking until he released over his chest and stomach. She looked on in amazement while rubbing her aching jaw.

"Wow," Hermione breathed inaudibly staring in wonder. Then she reached over for her wand and cleaned him up when he seemed to be finished. She took a moment to really look at him, his skin red and sweaty. He looked so vulnerable with his eyes closed as his chest rose and fell rapidly catching his breath.

"Holy shit…that was…brilliant…Why are you sitting there?" he asked when he opened his eyes and found her staring at him. He reached over and held her hand. "Are you alright?"

Hermione breathed in through her nose and her heart was beating fast, but it wasn't out of nerves or anxiety. She was feeling such an immense sense of pride and accomplishment. "That was just…wow," she chuckled and crawled over to lie next to him. "I was rather good, yeah? I mean it wasn't as gross as I thought it was going to be," she said grinning widely.

She looked over at Ron who was looking at her with one brow up.

"Oh, you know what I mean," Hermione said and turned her body into his arms.

"You're amazing, love," he mumbled into her hair. "I love you."

Hermione sighed and pulled back, rubbed her hand over his warm cheek and kissed his long nose. "I love you, too."

"Can we get breakfast now? I'm starved."

Hermione laughed and sat up looking down at him unable to keep a straight face when he was smiling up at her with that content grin of his. "Is that what you're thinking about right now?"

"Not just that," he said and laughed. "We could just stay here if you want."

"No," Hermione said and leaned over the bed to retrieve his pants from the floor. "You're right. I know you could use some food. Worked up an appetite, did you?"

"That's an understatement,' Ron said and sat up to pull his pants back on. He looked at her his grin becoming even bigger.

"Oi, look at you," Hermione said chuckling. "You better wipe that smug look off your face before we get to the Burrow today. Your mum will take one look at you and know something's up."

"Oh hell, Hermione. Don't remind me," he moaned turning around to stand up. "How are we going to do this? I can't go along with those barmy rules like you can. Not after all we did this past week."

"We'll figure something out," Hermione shrugged. "I'm not above breaking some rules, you know. At least not when it's important." She swung her legs off the bed to stand up and rummage through her bag for a change of clothes. "Let's get ready. There are few more things I want to do before my mum and dad arrive. Besides, I can hear your stomach growling from across the room."

"One week with me and you're a right rebel, Hermione," Ron teased.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

"So when are your mum and dad supposed to get here, Hermione?" Ron asked through the last bite of his third bacon sandwich. It was late afternoon and they were eating lunch in the newly and magically renovated kitchen of Hermione's house. They finished sorting out the rest of the house ridding corners of cobwebs, which Ron was suspiciously absent for, and at Hermione's insistence, did another sweep for any dark objects or traps. Thankfully there was nothing else to find and Hermione was finally at ease.

Hermione sat back in her chair across from Ron and turned her nose up at him. "That's disgusting, Ron. Can you at least swallow before talking?"

"It never bothered you before," he said still chewing.

"It most certainly did. Still does. I must have told you only a hundred times in the past seven plus years to- alright I'm not looking at you anymore."

Hermione put her head in her hands when Ron suddenly opened his mouth displaying every bit of chewed up food on his tongue. She heard Ron chuckle and felt like she could retch, but at the same time felt an odd sense of affection for him.

_Why did I have to fall in love with such a rude and obnoxious boy? There must be something wrong with me._

"You know," said Ron, "with your brilliant mind and my years of experience in that house I think we could get really creative." Hermione chanced a peek through her fingers at him and pulled her hands away when she saw his plate and mouth empty. She also saw his eyebrows wiggle and his lips form a smirk.

Glaring at him and trying not to smile she said, "Is that a fact? Well, you know, making a girl want to vomit will literally deflate any chances of any creative ideas being put into practice." She raised her eyebrows and smirked back at him when his face fell.

"Point taken," he said quickly. Hermione laughed enjoying the good natured feeling surrounding them.

"So what time are they coming, Hermione?"

She shook herself out of her daydream and saw Ron standing up to gather their empty plates.

"In about two more hours," she said looking at her watch and following him into the kitchen. "Do you need some help with that?" she asked as she nervously watched him attempt to pile the dishes in the dishwasher.

"No," Ron said as he clumsily arranged the breakfast and lunch dishes inside the racks. "I've got it."

Hermione bit the inside of her cheek when he placed a glass on the bottom rack right side up. "Ron? I think this goes up here," she said kindly and plucked up the glass and set it upside down on the top rack. "See?"

"No," Ron said taking the glass back and putting it back on the bottom rack. "Luann, your mum, told me to put the cups on the bottom." He turned the glass around and put it back on the bottom. He reached for a plate and was about to add it to the dishwasher when Hermione grabbed his arm.

"No, Ron…love. I think you misunderstood," Hermione said through her teeth. She smiled as she picked up the glass again. "Cups are different from glasses, see. Regular plastic type cups can be placed on the bottom, but only if there is no room on the top. Glasses, which are much more fragile, get placed on the top where they're most likely not to get jostled around by the jets of water and soap and break. And if you don't put it upside down you end up with a glass full of dirty dish water," she explained trying not to sound condescending. She set the glass upside down securely on the top rack and patted it with a smile as if it was an obedient puppy. "There. Easy, right?"

She beamed at Ron expecting him to nod in agreement and tell her how brilliant she was. Instead he was looking at her as if she just told him he had to run around the room in a chicken suit.

"Hermione, who bloody cares?" he asked shaking his head. "It all has to get clean so what does it matter where it goes?"

"Ron, I just explained to you why. Do you want broken dirty dishes or clean ones?" she asked her smile faltering.

"I just don't see why it matters where you put it. I'll go with you on the upside down cup idea, but-"

"It's a glass," Hermione interrupted rolling her eyes.

"Oh you're so smart, aren't you?" Ron glared at her.

"Yes I am," Hermione said exasperatedly. "So you see what I'm saying, then?"

"No. I mean yes I do, but only on that one part. I was told first to put it on the bottom and that's where I'm going to put it." He reached out and grabbed the glass faster than Hermione can stop him and pushed it into the bottom rack triumphantly. "Yeah?" he said raising his arms in the air as if waiting for her challenge him.

Hermione glared daggers at him. Why can't he just see it her way? Why was he being so stubborn?

"Are you looking for a fight, Ron? Or are you actually this clueless?"

"Oi! That was a good one, Hermione!" Ron said clapping and laughed. Hermione growled and bent over to take the glass back out and slammed it back onto the top rack making the machine rattle.

"Top rack, Ron! It's the only logical place!"

"But why does it-"

"If you had just listened to what I said to begin-"

"A bunch of rubbish is what-"

"Well! I see you two made yourselves comfortable. Aren't they adorable, Hugo?"

Hermione looked over Ron's shoulder as Ron spun around so fast he almost tripped on his own feet.

"Hi, mum. Dad," Hermione said sheepishly.

"Hi Mr. and Mrs. Granger," Ron said clearing his throat and waving.

Luann and Hugo were standing in the entrance of the kitchen watching them with bemused expressions on their faces. Hugo glanced at Ron sympathetically shaking his head.

Hermione shoved her way past Ron and went to hug her mum and dad. "Welcome home! We didn't expect you for a little while longer. We were just…cleaning up."

"Well it looks incredible, pumpkin," Hugo said looking around the room. "Any problems when you came back?"

Hermione spoke up quickly before Ron could answer and said, "No, nothing at all. Just some dust and cleaning we had to do. Things like that…" she said glancing at Ron and seeing him look at her curiously. "We set up all your things in your bedroom and office. All you have to do is call the practice and get your clients back. You should be up and running as soon as next week."

"My girl," Hugo said kissing her soundly on the cheek.

"Brilliant, both of you. Thank you so much," Luann said opening the cabinets and refrigerator. "It feels so good to be back. It's like we never left."

Hermione smiled at Ron and was relieved when he smiled back, their ridiculous row behind them. Hugo led them to the living room after Hermione set up tea and her parents told them about their flight. Ron and Hermione told them about Crookshanks, who was perched on the windowsill looking at all of them smugly, and how he gave them a fright. They told her parents about changing all the pictures and her bedroom back, but didn't mention anything about the mysterious red ball and the kitchen exploding. Hermione didn't think it was necessary to scare them when there was no longer anything threatening around the house. She wanted them to feel comfortable and safe in their real home.

"You will come back before September, won't you?" Luann was saying with a yawn. "We missed you terribly and now that we've got you back we would like to see you as much as possible."

Hugo leaned forward and regarded both Ron and Hermione and added, "We understand you belong somewhere else, but this will always be your home. Remember that, alright?"

Hermione felt a surge of love for her parents. She knew how lucky she was with such understanding and positive people to have raised her. She was so grateful to them and that she had a place in the muggle world as well as the magical world.

"Of course, daddy," she said and reached over to squeeze her dad's hand. "This is my first home. I'll always come back. Once I go to school it will be hard, but once I'm finished we, Ron and I, will be here a lot, trust me. Ron loves it here," she said laughing and looked at Ron whose face had turned pink.

"Your house is wicked," Ron said earnestly. "I wish I had grown up in place like this. Our house isn't nearly as nice."

"That's not true," Hermione said looking at him with a frown. She hated it when he put down where he came from. As embarrassed as he was about his house she never saw anything else but a loving and warm home full of the best people she ever met in her life. "I won't have you saying anything negative about my second home, Ron Weasley."

"Yeah, alright," Ron said with a smile and shrugged.

"Speaking of," Luann said, "when are you both off to see your family, Ron? I'm sure your mum is beside herself with worry by now."

"Yeah," Ron said. "We never said when we were coming back so we should go soon, I reckon."

After Luann yawned for the third time Hermione stood up and stretched. It was getting close to dinnertime and if she were honest with herself she was missing Mrs. Weasley's cooking like never before.

"Mum, you look knackered," Hermione said. "I wish you hadn't insisted on taking a plane. I'm sure the Ministry would have set up a portkey for you."

Her mum stood up with her and gave Hermione a hug. "Don't be silly. Us muggles are used to such inconveniences," she said making everyone chuckle.

"We love you, pumpkin," her dad said standing up and gathering her in a warm hug. She squeezed him back already missing them. She smiled to herself knowing that she would be coming back and that they would be there waiting for her.

"Yeah, It's been…really nice of you letting me into your home. Twice," Ron said after hugging both her parents. He blushed, his mouth set in a lopsided grin. "Thank you for being so kind and generous. I'm so glad we got along and that Hermione has such cool parents. You…er did a great job. Raising her, I mean. Thank you," he finished his face now red and his hands clasped in front of him.

Hermione beamed at him and felt her heart swell at how sweet and sincere he sounded. She knew it was difficult for him to say something like that to her mum and dad and the fact that he did meant he must have felt very strongly about his words. Hermione sniffed then laughed when her mum put her arm around her shoulders and whispered in her ear, "He's lovely."

"We'll have to make a trip up the Burrow sometime and visit with your parents, Ron," Hugo said clapping him on the shoulder.

"Sounds brilliant," Ron said nodding his head.

Hugo clapped his hands once and bounced on his heels. "We can make a day of it. We'll bring the car and I can teach you-"

"No!" Luann and Hermione shouted together.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: So lemons are used to describe a sweet sexy scene right? Well I have more of a…lime, if you will. Still citrusy, but with an edge. Let's see, what haven't they done yet…
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

Hermione was walking on a dirt path, with Ron lagging behind her, and breathed in the fresh and familiar air. It was as hot as ever in the early August humidity, but she never felt better. She felt Crookshanks squirming in her arms as he woke from his nap so she let him go, watching as he disappeared into the woods on the other side of the path.

"He'll find you again, you know," she heard Ron say as he caught up with her. "Can't get rid of that mental cat no matter how hard I try."

Hermione turned her head to peer at him and could see him struggling not to laugh. "I'm sure he's thinking the same thing about you. Come on, let's go," she said with a laugh, then started walking again.

"Wait, stop."

Hermione stopped, sighed and turned around.

"What is it, Ron?"

Ron and Hermione had apparated to a field just inside Ottery St. Catchpole and were making their way towards the Burrow. It was taking longer than Hermione thought was necessary mainly due to Ron wanting to stop every five seconds to ask her every question under the sun.

' _Are you sure you packed our toothbrushes?'_

' _Why did we apparate so far, anyway?'_

' _Do you think Harry and Ginny will be mad we didn't get them a souvenir?'_

Hermione almost rolled her eyes at that one before she considered the question and wondered if they should have brought back souvenirs…

He was making her stop once more and she didn't think she could wait any longer. She really did miss the Weasleys and Harry.

"I was just going to say…er, what time is it?"

Hermione threw her hands up to the sky impatiently. "For merlin's sake! What does it matter, Ron? We're here," she said, pointing to the tiny teetering stack of misshapen rooms that was the Burrow in the distance. "Besides, I thought you missed your family."

She watched as his eyes left hers and travelled over her body. He smirked at her and licked his lips. She felt a jolt of desire combined with annoyance. "You know, Ron, it is dinner time. I'm sure your mum has started cooking already…" she said in an attempt to get him moving along by mentioning food. She saw his eyebrows perk up and she smiled encouragingly. "That's right, Ron – food. Come on, love. Not much further."

"Alright, very funny, Hermione," Ron said and walked up to her so close she had to tilt her head back to look at him.

"Tell me what's going on."

"Honestly, and this is going to sound poofy as hell, but I just wanted to get a few more moments alone with you," he said tucking her hair behind her ear. "I reckon I got used to being with you alone. It's not going to be easy in that house to get you on your own. I don't think my bollocks can handle it."

"Oh, you!" Hermione said laughing and smacked his shoulder. "Here I thought you were being sweet when all you're thinking about are your…your…"

"Come on, say it," Ron said stepping in closer to her and grabbing at her waist. "Say bollocks."

"Absolutely not. You are entirely too pervy right now for your own good," said Hermione as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Me, really? Do you not remember last night when you climbed on top of me for a second round? Talk about pervy," he said as he leaned down to kiss her. She let him and smiled against his lips remembering her bold behavior and how great it felt to let go and be with him the way she always dreamed of. She tried desperately to shove her insane nightmare from her mind as Ron's hands moved lower to rest on her hips.

"That was fantastic, wasn't it?" she mumbled into his mouth before he slipped his tongue inside and deepened their kiss.

After a few moments Ron pulled away, peppering kisses along her neck. "Mmm, so good, Hermione."

"Ron, we really should be going. If I'm hungry then you must be starved to death." It was hard for her to stop him, but the sun was hanging low in the sky and she didn't want to deal with Ron on an empty stomach; not if she could help it.

"Come on, Hermione. Give me five minutes. I'll make it worth it, please," he said completely ignoring what she just said. Hermione rolled her eyes then closed them when Ron slipped his hands under her rucksack and her shirt, his fingers sliding over her sweaty back and fumbling with the clasp of her bra.

"Ron," she breathed into his shoulder. He was kissing below her ear and she had to stop herself from moaning. "We're outside."

"No one can see us from here, I promise. Relax," he whispered then made a sound of victory after finally unclasping her bra. Hermione could feel a draft on her breasts as her bra came away from her chest and sighed with relief. She never did like wearing one of those things anyway.

Ron ran his hands over her ribs and up to her chest, massaging her breasts under her loose bra as his mouth moved over her throat. Hermione moaned, despite her best efforts, and tugged on the hair at the nape of his neck. Ron pulled her body into his and pressed his lips against hers once more. The sensation of his hands on her clammy body and his full lips moving over hers was intensified by the knowledge that they were being so intimate in such a public setting. There was no one around and the nearest house was just a speck, but that didn't stop Hermione's heart from racing at the thought of doing so improper.

As they kissed Ron walked them to the side of the dirt road, inside a cluster of trees, and backed her into one. Hermione could feel the rough bark on the back of her head, but didn't care that her hair was getting caught on the splintering wood. Ron had taken their rucksacks off and Hermione didn't even notice until he pulled back from her and she saw him fling them to the ground.

"What are we doing?" she asked, breathless. Her nipples were rubbing against the edge of her bra as she took in short breaths, her chest heaving up and down. The friction on her breasts only made her ache for Ron's hands again.

"I don't know," Ron said and laughed as he reached out to wrap his hands around her waist. "What do you want to do?"

_I want to rip your clothes off and throw you down right here and now on this dirty, filthy ground, twigs, bugs and all. I want to feel you inside of me in the worst way. I want to fuck you, Ron Weasley._

Hermione opened her eyes wide as her thoughts turned decidedly naughty. "I…I-"

Her feelings must have shown on her face because Ron was smirking at her. He licked his lips, staring at her mouth. "Yeah, me, too."

"5 minutes?" Hermione whispered before she could stop herself. She saw Ron's eyes widen in surprise before they narrowed in determination.

"It will be the best five minutes, I swear," Ron said as he stepped back and started taking off his trousers, his fingers flying over the button and zipper. Hermione would have laughed if she wasn't so nervous.

"Wait, stop," she said and took out her wand. She muttered the concealment charm around them making them invisible to anyone who were to come across them, not that anyone would, but Hermione didn't fancy the idea of getting caught being shagged against a tree.

"Brilliant. Now take your shorts off," Ron said, walking back to her, tripping over his trousers that were wrapped around his ankles.

Hermione giggled as she fumbled with her shorts and pulled them off with her knickers, gracefully stepping out of them and neatly hanging them on a low branch. She closed her eyes and leaned back against the tree as Ron ran his hands under her shirt to her breasts then down her belly and over her hips. She felt so exposed, out in the open, in only her shirt and sandals. She couldn't believe they were actually going to do this. Her heart was pounding away in her chest and she was blowing air out of her mouth, trying to calm her nerves.

"I'm so nervous," she muttered and opened her eyes to see how Ron was feeling about the situation. He didn't seem nervous at all. In fact, if she didn't know any better, she would think it was every day that he found himself ready to shag in the woods.

"Don't be nervous," he said as he smoothed her hair away from her face with both hands. "Damn, you're fucking sexy, Hermione. I've always wanted to fuck you like this."

Hermione rolled her eyes and licked her lips when one of his hands cupped her mound between her legs. "Eloquent as always," she said then moaned when two of his fingers delved into her already wet folds. She parted her legs and she heard the shuffling of his trouser covered feet as he stepped in closer to her. He was being so slow and sweet, caressing her sex with one hand while the other combed through her hair. She opened her eyes and smiled at the way he was staring at her with open affection, desire. He was telling her she could trust him and she felt her insides melt in his gaze and her nerves subside.

"I love you, Ron. I can't say it enough," she said and gasped as one finger entered her, stroking her. She licked her lips and moaned when another finger entered her, sliding in and out of her in an agonizingly slow rhythm. "Oh, my god," she mumbled and leaned her head back; looking up she could see the green leaves from the tree swaying in the breeze and she could swear they were moving in the same rhythm of Ron's careful touch.

"You know I love you, Hermione. So fucking much, but never more than when you look like this," Ron said before he bent over and licked his tongue across her jaw. A breeze blew across the wet trail he left behind and she shivered against him making him sink in deeper.

"Ron, as much as I appreciate you being so sweet and…lovely," she let out a sharp gasp and gripped his shoulders when he started to use a thumb to roll over her most sensitive spot, "but I did say five minutes. I want you…Now," she finished and stared at him intently, hoping she was getting her meaning across. She wanted to let loose and have him lose control with her. They were outside, half starkers, and she felt a rush of desire and recklessness come over her.

He stopped his hand and stared at her with hooded eyes and an open mouth. "Do you want it…fast? God, Hermione, I want you so fucking bad. Is that what you want? Just say yes, or nod, or whatever, and I'll do it. I'll make you fucking scream."

"Oh…goodness," Hermione said breathlessly and threw her head back again, bucking her hips into his hand that was still between her legs. "Just do it, Ron. Make it fast, and hard, and…do whatever you want, okay?" She felt like her face was on fire with the amount of blushing that was going on, but the words just tumbled out of her mouth. She needed it this way and trusted him to have her any way he saw fit.

"Hermione," Ron muttered before attacking her mouth with his, kissing her fiercely and shoving his tongue inside her mouth, bruising her lips and pushing her head into the trunk of the tree. Hermione hummed into his mouth and kissed him back, pulling his hair and rotating her hips. Ron removed his fingers from inside her and moved his hands to grip her naked hips. He pulled her roughly against him so she felt his muscle, hard on her belly. Then he was gone, backing up away from her making her almost stumble.

"What's the matter?" she asked, bracing herself against the tree trunk.

"I want to try something," he said and took out his wand to cast the contraceptive charm on himself. Then he enlarged a leaf and cast a cushioning charm on it. "Do you trust me?"

She wasn't feeling very patient, but was taken aback by his question. "Yes…Of course I do, Ron. Completely."

He grinned then pulled her to the cushioned and enlarged leaf and gently pushed her down on top of it. She turned on her back and was pleasantly surprised at how comfortable it was.

"Ron, this is brilliant. Not really necessary, but again I'm appreciative," she said and smiled when she saw him looking over her exposed body.

"It's not for your back, Hermione. Turn around," he said as he dropped down to his knees on front of her. She just stared at him, confused. He quirked an eyebrow and suddenly she understood.

_Oh my god, he wants to do it like…that._

"Um…okay," Hermione said nervously and turned around to place her hands and knees on the soft surface of the leaf. "Like this?"

"Fuck, that's hot," Ron said and smoothed his hands over her arse cheeks and hips and back again. He found her middle again and she felt the wetness between her legs slide across his fingers. Ron's words and movements were full of confidence and Hermione couldn't help but feel submissive in this position. She was surprised to find that she liked it – a lot.

Suddenly he was pushing his hard erection into her opening and it was unlike anything she had ever felt before. They shagged only a few times, but she knew he had never been inside her as deep as he was right then.

"Oooh, my god," Hermione moaned and ducked her head down to take in a deep breath.

"Holy fuck. Are you alright?" Ron said, not moving.

"Yeah," Hermione said quickly. If he stopped now she felt she just might die right there. "Don't stop."

She felt Ron move her shirt up her back and kiss her spine. "You'll have to stop me," said Ron as he kissed her shoulder blades.

Hermione couldn't take it anymore. Her entire body felt like it was on fire, shivers were running down her arms and legs, her stomach flipping around like a fish out of water.

"Just do it already!" She pushed back with her hips and gasped as she felt him move inside her as she pulled back slightly. He was touching places inside of her that she never even knew existed, and she could feel herself getting wetter.

"Fuuuuck," Ron growled and ground into her hips. He started moving, gaining momentum as he slid easily in and out of her body. Hermione glanced over her shoulder as she rocked back and forth. Ron was biting his lip and staring down at her arse, probably at his own erection as he bucked against her; the skin of her bum and his abdomen were making smacking noises, louder and faster as he grunted and groaned over her.

"So…fucking…good," Ron muttered. Hermione turned back around fully aroused, her body shaking with the beginning tremors of an oncoming orgasm.

"Oh god…oh…yes…Ron…keep…going…don't…stop," Hermione was yelling and pounding her fist on front of her.

"Oh god…Hermione. Do you…like that? Fuck!" Ron exclaimed and pounded into her faster and harder. Hermione felt his hands grip her hips even harder, his fingers tight against the bone and she knew she would find bruises there later.

"Oh yeah! Yeah! Harder, please! Do it, Ron! Fu-Fuck me!" She was losing control and felt like she could break in half as Ron pulled her into him even harder than before. For a few seconds her vision blurred in front of her and she realized it was because Ron was moving them at a frenzied pace.

"Ooooh…Fuck! I'm gonna…Ooooh…Oh," Ron yelled so loud that Hermione felt his voice shake her body. That sent her over the edge; she came so hard, her body shuddering over and over as his orgasm spilled inside of her.

When she felt the intense throbbing wear off she collapsed on her stomach with Ron on top of her. She didn't even care to tell him to move. His face was buried in her neck and she could feel his short spastic breath blowing on her ear. Her hair was wet with sweat, clinging to the side of her face and across her eyes so could barely see anything.

"I'll move, just give me a minute," Ron mumbled, his voice hoarse. "I can't feel my legs."

Hermione laughed softly underneath him, enjoying the weight of his body on her back, pressing her into the cushioned leaf that Ron so brilliantly and thoughtfully transfigured for her.

"Are you okay?" Ron asked as he rolled off her off of her slowly and dropped on his back next to her. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"No," Hermione said shaking her head and sitting up gingerly. "I don't think I can walk properly – ever again – but it was worth it. That was…wow. You're amazing."

He just stared at her and she could tell he was thinking of something to say. "What is it, Ron?"

He grinned widely at her and reached out to caress her face then pulled her in for a kiss. When they parted he whispered, "You said 'fuck', Hermione."

Hermione was confused for a moment, then realized what he was talking about, and smacked his shoulder. "Ta! That was in the heat of the moment, I'll have you know," she said and pushed off of him. She couldn't help but laugh at his cheeky smile.

"I know," he said sitting up and stretching his limbs, "but it was still bloody hot."

Hermione rolled her eyes and stood up on wobbly legs. She helped Ron get to his feet as his trousers were still tangled around his trainers. They both laughed at how absurd they both looked with their naked bums, weak knees and leaning on each other.

They got dressed quickly, making sure Hermione's hair was free of bark and both their faces were flush-free, and retrieved their rucksacks. Hermione changed the leaf back to normal size and density and, in a last moment of sentimentality, tucked the leaf into her pocket with a blush and a smile.

...

Hermione saw the Burrow becoming larger in front of her. If it wasn't for her aching knees and sore body she would have ran at full speed to get there faster. The sky was becoming darker, making the shape of the house stand out with its familiar, slanted roofs and many chimneys sticking out in curious places. She could tell there were people home because every window was ablaze with light. Hermione was reminded of a ceramic vase she once made as a child where she cut out holes along the sides so she can put a candle in and watch the light create different shapes along her walls. It was beautiful and now she had a life-sized version of it standing before her. She felt a slight tremor and her vision shimmered in front of her as she broke through the ward around the Burrow. She was coming home and her heart sped up with anticipation.

"Hermione! Ron!" She tore her eyes away from the house and saw Ginny sprinting across the grass towards them. Hermione walked faster until she felt Ginny's tall frame collide with hers in a fierce hug.

"I saw you from the window and had to come out…Shit, I've missed you," Ginny said and squeezed Hermione tighter.

"Missed you, too, Ginny," Hermione said laughing and squeezed her back. She smelled like grass and dirt, chocolate and chicken. "What have you been doing today?" Hermione asked with a chuckle as she stepped back and sniffed her. Ginny was wearing loose cutoffs with an oversized t-shirt with HolyHead Harpies written across the front tucked inside her shorts. Hermione looked down and when she saw Ginny's bare feet she knew she was in the right place.

"Why? Do I stink?" Ginny asked curiously, lifting her arm and smelling her armpit. She shrugged and said, "Harry and I were out flying before dinner and-oh Ron!"

Hermione watched with a smirk as Ron, who just walked up to them, barely had time to brace himself for Ginny's pounce.

"Oof! Fuck, Ginny, give a bloke a warning," he said, but Hermione could see his smile grow wider as he hugged her back. "It's only been a week, you brat."

Ginny let him go and pushed his shoulder. "I know that, you prat. I just really missed you guys. Oh! There's something you should-"

"Ginny where- Hey you're back!"

"Harry!" Hermione greeted her best friend who had just stepped out of the house. Before he closed the door she could hear the din of noise coming from inside of what sounded like lots of people talking. Harry loped down the steps and pulled Hermione into a hug.

"Oi! Why do I always get sloppy second hugs around here?" Ron whined from beside Hermione.

"Welcome back," Harry whispered in Hermione's ear. He was warm and solid she felt his strong arms tighten around her shoulders. She missed him terribly, but didn't realize just how much until that moment.

"Thanks, Harry," she said with a squeeze. She let go of him and watched as Harry and Ron shook hands and gave each other a quick hug. "We missed both of you, didn't we, Ron?"

Ron rolled his eyes and shrugged. "I reckon we did. You could use a shower, though, mate," he said with his nose crinkled, looking at Harry.

"Missed you, too, you wanker," Harry said laughing. "So how did it go? How are your parents, Hermione?" he asked her eagerly.

Hermione beamed at him and said, "They're wonderful! We decided to stay the week and now they're back in London. They're back home."

"I knew you could do it," Harry said and hugged her again.

"Thank you. It was a bit scary at first, but Ron was brilliant. I don't know what I would have done without him."

She gazed at Ron and saw him blush and scratch his neck. "I was happy to help. We had a lot of fun…" he said and stopped to gaze back at Hermione. She felt like she was frozen with a smile on her face, just staring at him. They shared a knowing look as images of naked skin, sounds of slapping skin and moaning, and the feeling of Ron's hands and other body parts connecting with hers came to mind. Looking at Ron's expression she could guess that his thoughts weren't too far off from her own.

"Okay, so," Harry said a bit too loudly, obviously trying to get their attention, "you have great timing. Ron, your brothers are here, and Fleur, too."

"Really?" Ron said, looking away from Hermione and moving toward the back door. So those were the voices that Hermione heard. She was happy to hear that Ron's family was there, but wondered what the occasion was. She didn't think they could handle any more bad news. Ron must have been thinking the same thing because he was frowning as he opened the door.

As soon as they entered the kitchen Hermione and Ron were immediately greeted with words of welcome from Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Bill, Fleur, Percy and George. They were sitting at the dinner table together, eating and talking. Hermione let out the breath she was holding. No one looked alarmed and there didn't seem to be any indication of bad news. Harry and Ginny stepped around them and took their places back at the table. Hermione glanced at Ron and saw his face light up at the scene in front of them.

"Oh, Ronnie! Hermione! You're back!" Mrs. Weasley jumped up from her chair and grabbed them both in a hug. Mr. Weasley stood up, hugging each of them in turn.

"Hello, Mrs. Weasley," Hermione said with a smile, hugging her back just as tightly. "Mr. Weasley, thank you for setting up the portkeys. Everything worked out wonderfully, so thank you."

"Everything sorted, then?" Mr. Weasley said with his hands on her shoulders. Hermione smiled and nodded.

"Hi, mum, dad," Ron said as he eased off Hermione's rucksack from her back and deposited both of them on the floor next to the door. "Sorry there was no notice. We didn't really get around to sending an owl or anything."

"Oh, never mind that!" Mrs. Weasley said waving her hand in front of her dismissively. She was beaming at them and Hermione noticed that this was the happiest Mrs. Weasley has been in a long time. "We'll talk all about your trip as soon as you've eaten. Did you eat dinner? Oh, what does it matter? Sit where you can and I'll fix some plates. Go on, sit!"

She ushered them to the table where Bill got up and conjured up two more chairs to add to the expanding table between Mr. Weasley and Percy. Ron and Hermione sat down across from Harry and Ginny who both looked very happy. Bill and Fleur were sitting on the other side of Ginny, beaming at each other. She looked to her right at Percy who smiled at her. She smiled back and then turned to Ron. They looked at each other and seemed to be asking the same question with their eyes.

_What is going on around here? Everyone seems very… excited about something. We leave for a week and come back to some kind of…what is this? A celebration?_

"Where's Charlie?" Hermione asked looking around the table.

"Romania," Percy said from beside her after dabbing his mouth with a napkin. "It's a shame he couldn't make it. He would have loved to be here. You spoke to him, isn't that right, Bill?"

"Yeah, flooed him this morning," Bill said wrenching his gaze away from Fleur to nod at Percy and then at Ron and Hermione. "Brilliant, isn't it?"

"Wha-" Ron started to say, but seemed to forget everything once Mrs. Weasley set their plates down in front of them. Delicious aromas of baked chicken, potatoes, gravy and buttered vegetables wafted into Hermione's and Ron's noses. She and Ron looked at each other and grinned before picking up their forks and diving in.

"Oh, mum, I've missed this," Ron said over a mouth full of potatoes.

"Then you might want to keep the food inside your mouth if you missed it that much, little brother."

Everyone turned their head to look at George who chuckled and ate his food with a grin. They all seemed so surprised to hear him crack a joke that it took a few seconds for them to start laughing, starting with Ginny, who snorted into her hand.

"Did you save your manners for Hermione's parents or were you this disgusting over there, too?" Ginny quipped.

"Oi!," Ron exclaimed, looking around and swallowed, trying not to laugh. "I had perfect manners. Tell them, Hermione."

Hermione shrugged her shoulders and looked up at the ceiling, playing along with the others. She wanted to tell them all that Ron was a perfect gentleman, but she couldn't help but get sucked into the Weasley banter.

"Yes," Percy spoke up, his voice serious, over the dwindling laughter, "please tell us our Ron had the decency to not speak with food flying out of his mouth. Really, Ron, we wouldn't want people to think you were raised in a barn."

There was silence once again before the laughter started up even louder this time.

"I was serious," Percy said, but only Hermione heard him.

Hermione chuckled along with everyone, but it was a mild attempt because she was busy looking at Ron. He looked like he was trying to join in with his family's merriment, but was finding it hard for his smile to reach his eyes.

"Are you alright?" Hermione whispered into his ear and squeezed his knee.

"Oh…yeah, but" Ron said looking down at her, his eye brows low over his eyes, "doesn't it feel a bit strange to you? The way we're all acting? I mean, look at George."

Hermione glanced over and saw George smiling along with his brothers and Harry as they moved on to tease Ginny about her eating habits.

"I don't understand," Hermione whispered. "What do you mean? We were gone a week, you know. A lot can happen in that time…" she said with a shrug. She wasn't sure if what she said worked to calm him down because his face only got redder as his eyes darted around the table taking in everyone's behavior.

Ron suddenly stood up and Hermione sighed heavily, put her fork down and pulled on Ron's sleeve. "Ron, what are you doing?" she hissed.

Most of the talking had stopped and everyone was looking at Ron expectantly. He ignored Hermione's question and she could feel him shaking next to her.

"What the hell is with all of you?" Ron asked, his voice raising. "Why are you all so bloody happy all of a sudden? George?"

Everyone now looked over at George who began to sputter and open his eyes wide. He put his hands up and said, "I'm just having dinner, Ron. What's up your arse anyway? You should be happy too, you know."

Mr. Weasley reached up, put his hand on Ron's shoulder and said, "Son, listen I don't think-"

"They don't know, yet!" Ginny interrupted and rolled her eyes at everyone. "I wanted to tell them outside, but I thought it might be best coming from you," she said and looked over at Bill.

"They don't know? I thought mum or one of you would have sent them an owl," Bill said clearly confused.

"No," Harry said. "They've been in Australia. Haven't written anything all week."

"Oh that's right!" Mrs. Weasley clapped her hands and Hermione craned her neck over Ron and Mr. Weasley to look at her.

"Mrs. Weasley, what is going on?" Hermione asked, not comfortable with being the last one to know something.

"Well," Bill said and Hermione turned to face him on the other side of the table, "Fleur and I-"

"We're having a baby!" Fleur stood up and clasped her hands to her chest, smiling wide.

"Right," Bill said. "We are. We told everyone last night and assumed someone must have sent the news your way. Sorry it was a bit confusing for a minute, but its excellent news, yeah?" he finished and pulled one of Fleur's hands into his and kissed her knuckles.

"It's the best news," Mrs. Weasley said sniffling.

Hermione looked around at everyone's smiling faces as they resumed talking and felt her face crack into one as well. An overwhelming feeling of relief filled her body.

_A baby…Wow, a baby! Oh thank goodness. If there is anything this family needs to bring them together and make them this happy its promise of a new life. It's no wonder everyone is so excited!_

"Ron, a baby," Hermione said, looking up at him. He sat down with a thump, staring at Bill.

"You're having a baby?" Ron said quietly and everyone stopped talking once again to stare at him. Bill nodded as Fleur sat back down and rubbed her flat belly. Hermione saw Ron glance at Fleur for a second and the edge of his mouth turned up into a grin before he looked back at Bill. "A baby? Really? Seriously?"

"Yes, Ron. Seriously and really," Ginny said sarcastically from across the table before grinning and taking a bite of her food.

"Ginny," Mr. Weasley scolded.

"Sorry, dears. We would have told you if we knew how to reach you," Mrs. Weasley said.

"That's," Ron said as he looked at everyone, "brilliant! I'm going to be an uncle, then?"

"This one catches on quick," Ginny muttered then apologized quickly after Harry shook his head at her.

"We're all going to be uncles," Percy said happily from beside Hermione.

"Congratulations!" Hermione exclaimed, smiling at Bill and Fleur. "I'm so happy for you. This is the best news ever,"

The Weasleys' happiness was contagious and she couldn't stop smiling until George spoke up and said quietly, "Not  _everyone_  is going to be an uncle."

And just like that the mood dissipated with the reminder that one brother, one who was also supposed to become an uncle and join in the happiness, was missing…dead.

Hermione looked over at Ron quickly, worried about his reaction. Ron looked pained and sickly. Hermione looked around at everyone and no one seemed to know what to say. She wanted them to continue with the celebration. She needed them to keep smiling because the heavy sadness that was starting to weigh down the room was also weighing down on her chest. She searched desperately inside her brain for something to do or say to get them all back to how they were just moments ago. She felt her hands shaking and reached out to Ron who gripped her hands instantly.

"Sorry," George finally mumbled before standing up. She heard Mrs. Weasley let out a small sobbing noise and saw Mr. Weasley stand up with George.

"George, it's alright. We understand – Please stay and we –"

"No, dad. It's fine," George said more firmly then looked at Bill. "I am happy, truly. I thought I could – but it's just not…I'm sorry," he said and Hermione saw his face contort into a cringe before walking out the back door. It slammed shut and no one moved.

"I apologize," Fleur said weakly, no longer rubbing her stomach. She looked at Bill who was staring at the door where George just left from. "We didn't mean to ignore or, that is to say, I didn't think that this would or in any way-"

"Fleur, it's alright, please," Bill said, still staring ahead and shaking his head.

"Oh, dear, it's not anyone's fault. We couldn't be happier…It's just all so…fresh," Mrs. Weasley hiccupped and Mr. Weasley wrapped his arm around her shoulders, letting her cry into his shoulder. She heard him inhale as if trying to suppress his own tears and felt her heart drop to her stomach.

Hermione looked straight at Ginny who was spearing her potatoes with her fork as though taking her anger out on food would make her feel better. She looked at Harry who was glaring at the table. Hermione could guess what was going on in his mind and wanted to pull him aside and tell him this wasn't his fault, but Ron's hand was tightening around hers.

"Are you alright?" she whispered to Ron for the second time that night.

"Yeah, I think…I think I'm going to go and find him. Feels like the right thing to do," he whispered back and Hermione smiled at him, understanding what he wanted to do was for himself as well as for George. He nodded his head once then pulled his hand away and stood up. "I'll go after him," he announced, "I wanted to talk to him anyway so I reckon now is the time, yeah?"

"Oh, Ronnie, tell him we love him and we aren't upset with him, alright? Take care of your brother," Mrs. Weasley said through her tears.

"I will, mum. It's okay," Ron was saying as he hugged his mum. "I have to do this."

When Mrs. Weasley let him go he turned to Hermione gesturing for her to follow before he opened the door. Shakily, she threw her napkin on the table and walked with him outside.

He was standing just outside the back door, leaning against the railing of the stairs. The only light came through the kitchen window behind his head making his hair an even brighter orange in contrast to the darkness of the night. His face was grim, but determined which made Hermione less worried.

Hermione closed the door behind her and reached out, sweeping his hair from his eyes with her fingers and said, "Did you want me to go with you?"

He stopped her hand, taking it into his own and shook his head making the hair fall back to where it was before. "No, I just wanted to talk to you alone before I left," he said quietly. "Are you alright with me leaving? I don't know when I'll be back. George was in a right state."

"Oh, yes, of course," Hermione nodded and swallowed the lump inside her throat. She knew she shouldn't feel offended, but he was making it sound as though she wouldn't be able to function if he left. If it were three months ago she would have begged him to stay, but when Hermione thought about it she felt proud that she no longer felt the nervousness that came along with letting him out of her sight. She looked into his eyes and saw a new strength there that, if she were to analyze it, had slowly been making its way to the surface over the past year. Ron had matured in so many ways and her heart swelled with pride and love. "I'll be fine, Ron. I'm more worried about George, and you. Do you think he went back to his flat?"

He looked relieved and shrugged. "I dunno, but it's a good place to start," he said and pulled her in for a gentle hug. Hermione breathed in his smell and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Will you sleep in my room tonight? Tell Harry to bugger off. I need to see you as soon as I get back."

Hermione only nodded against his chest and felt his lips on her temple before he let her go.

"Love you, Hermione. See you soon," he said as he walked down the stairs and looked back up from the grass.

"Love you, too, Ron. Be careful, alright?"

He smiled at her then turned to walk away, past the ward and waved before he disappeared with a crack. Hermione wanted to follow after Ron, but she knew this was something he had to do on his own.

"I'm sure…they'll be fine," Hermione said out loud to herself.

Her palms were starting to itch and she rubbed them on her legs as she turned back to the house. When she walked back into the kitchen she noticed Harry staring at her. She felt something pass between them, and she sighed then nodded.

"Right," Harry said, standing up. "I'm going to find them."

"What – Where are you going?" Ginny asked sharply as if just noticing her surroundings.

"I'm going to go find Ron and George. Percy, Bill, do you want to come?" Harry looked at both brothers and they looked at each other before they also stood up with him.

"Of course," Bill said. "Dad, mum, we'll take care of them. I promise." Mrs. Weasley nodded mutely and Mr. Weasley just held her closer to him. Bill looked down at Fleur who was looking more depressed by the minute. "Fleur, honey. Can you stay here tonight? We might be gone all night and I'll feel better if you were here with family."

Hermione saw Fleur smile up at him and caress his cheek. She felt like she was staring at a very intimate moment between the married couple, but couldn't look away.

"Oui, mon cherie, I vill stay here. Is that alright, mum?" she regarded Mrs. Weasley who nodded and sniffled.

"Right," Percy said making his way over to the door. "We'll be back…sometime. Don't worry," he said and kissed his mum before leaving.

Harry and Bill both said goodbye to Ginny and Fleur then to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley before following after Percy. Hermione watched them leave one by one. Harry turned back to wave at her and suddenly she felt the urge to move, to say something. She turned on her feet and ran out the door, catching up with Harry.

"Harry," she panted and grabbed his arm. Percy and Bill were waiting just outside the ward for him, but Hermione remembered her conversation with Ron that morning, and had to relay a message to Ron somehow. "Can you please tell Ron that…remind him that he's not a prat and…not to avoid anything. He'll know what I mean if you tell him that. Please?"

Harry looked at her strangely then shook his head. "Alright, Hermione," he said and squeezed her shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll tell him. Take care of Ginny, will you? Make sure she doesn't murder any more potatoes?"

Hermione sighed and said, "Yes, I will. So I'll see you and Ron soon, yeah?"

"Hermione, Ron will be fine. We just want to be there for George. I also want to watch out for Ron. This family has been through enough and…maybe I can help."

Hermione thought about it and knew Harry was right. She wanted Ron to talk with George about Fred and felt better that Harry and his brothers were with him. She also knew George needed his brothers and considered Harry one of them. "Of course, I'm just being silly," she said and smiled, trying to calm her nerves.

"You're anything but silly, Hermione," he said before giving her shoulder one last squeeze and jogged towards the edge of the ward.

Hermione jumped when she heard the back door open and close behind her. She turned and saw Ginny, her bare feet padding down the stairs, staring ahead to where Harry had just disappeared with Bill and Percy.

She stood next to Hermione and said matter-of-factly, "They're all prats, you know."

Hermione looked over at Ginny's profile and was struck, not for the first time, by how beautiful Ron's sister was. She always had a strong confidence about her that Hermione envied. However, in that moment, all she could see was sadness underneath a now simmering anger.

"They're men," Hermione said softly.

Ginny turned her head to look at Hermione. Then just like that sadness and anger were gone and replaced with her usual confidence and amusement.

"Isn't that what I said?" Ginny shrugged and smirked then turned back towards the house.

"Are you alright, Ginny?" Hermione found herself saying to Ginny's back, and watched as she stiffened then turned around to face Hermione.

"Why wouldn't I be, Hermione?" Ginny said, her voice calm.

"I only asked because you – "

But Ginny continued, her voice low, but becoming louder as she kept talking. "I mean, my brother is only dead, right? And my other brothers, and the man that I love, just went after the twin of said dead brother while one of my other brothers can't even be here." Hermione stood stock still, staring at her, watching silently as Ginny became unraveled before her.

"Not to mention I just watched my dad take my sobbing mother upstairs," she shouted and pointed at the house behind her, "where she'll probably bawl her fucking eyes out for another month until she can come back downstairs again. And poor Fleur, thinking she's giving us such great news. Thinking that a bloody baby is going to fix everything. Well I thought it would, too, but I guess we're all stupid then, aren't we? How stupid to think that we could have one fucking day of – happiness without –" she choked on her words and sat heavily onto the grass. She planted her feet on the ground and crossed her arms over her knees, crying. Hermione quickly cast a muffliato spell with her wand and cautiously sat down next to her. It was so rare for her, or anyone, to witness Ginny break down like this. To see her cry was like watching an eclipse. Hermione sat close to her and let her presence known by proximity alone.

"He's there – always there – in everything," Ginny sobbed into her knees and pulled at her hair. "I hate this, Hermione – It's not fair – I don't want to hate him – but I do. Fred was stupid to die," Ginny cried and sobbed even louder. Hermione held her breath and looked around. Even though she cast the spell so no one would hear them she was still worried. She wondered what happened to Fleur and if she heard Ginny and if she was still sitting at the table inside thinking this was all her fault for having a baby in her belly, which was absurd, but if she were Fleur she knew she might feel the same way.

"Ginny," Hermione said softly not wanting to incite another melt down.

"What?" Ginny croaked out without looking up. Hermione heard her sniffling and taking in deep breaths. Hermione took her own deep breaths and worked silently to slow her rapidly beating heart. The amount of grief inside that kitchen was unbearable, as if it was three months ago all over again, but hearing Ginny let go like that was heart wrenching.

She understood that Ginny was upset and that she didn't mean everything she said. Even if she did, Hermione knew that was mostly grief talking. She knew Ginny didn't really hate Fred or blame Fleur for anything. She knew that Ginny had a heart as big as everyone else in the Weasley family and that each and every one of them is breaking.

"I'm right here, that's all," Hermione said and reached out to stroke the Ginny's back lightly. She hoped it was enough.

"I'm sorry I was a bitch just now," she heard Ginny say from under her arms.

Hermione ran her hands through Ginny's long hair and sighed. "You weren't, I promise," she said and moved closer to wrap an arm around her shoulders. "And it's okay, I don't mind being the one to take it. I understand, trust me. Better me than anyone else. How do you feel?"

Ginny straightened up and wiped her eyes and nose with the top of her t-shirt. Hermione noticed her normally bright and freckled face was pale under the redness that was the result of her scrubbing.

"I feel…sick. I can't believe I said all those things," she cringed and looked at Hermione. "Do you think my parents and Fleur heard me?"

"I cast a muffliato after you started…yelling. I'm not sure what they heard. Was Fleur still in the kitchen when you came out?"

"No, she went upstairs with my parents," Ginny said, rubbing her eyes. "Mum insisted she take Charlie's old bedroom. I reckon all the excitement did her in."

"It's good for her to rest. You know, for the baby," Hermione said and rubbed Ginny's arm. "I don't think they heard you, so don't worry, alright?"

They sat next to each other in the grass for a few moments then Ginny laid her head on Hermione's shoulder. "We're really screwed up, aren't we?"

Hermione considered her question, whether it was rhetorical of not. "We might be 'screwed up', but at least we're all in it together, yeah?" She felt Ginny chuckle and continued, "And we all love each other. That's important, too. I don't know what type of person I would be if I didn't love your family, Ginny. You all mean so much to me, not only Ron," she paused and laughed softly. "You're the only girl I can stand to be around…And, to be honest, the only girl who can stand me."

Ginny lifted her head and wrapped her arms around Hermione in a tight hug. "Thank you," she said. "My brother may be an insufferable twat, but he's damn lucky."

Hermione laughed and hugged her back. She felt another part of her heart click into place and sighed contentedly. "We'll be alright, Ginny."

Ginny pulled away and smoothed down her long red hair before she jumped to her feet. She helped Hermione up and said, "Come on, we have the kitchen to ourselves tonight. We can pig out on mum's homemade pudding without having to worry about looking posh in front of the  _men_."

Hermione sighed, looking at Ginny's determined face as she fought to keep her own straight and void of any concern. "That sounds like a good way to end the night," Hermione said with a smile, letting her know she understood. Whatever Ginny let loose that night was exactly what she needed and Hermione was more than happy to humor her into a plate of pudding and harmless banter.

"How many galleons do you want to bet they're going to come home pissed?" Ginny said as they ambled up the stairs.

Hermione stopped just outside the door and regarded Ginny with a thoughtful look and a finger against her chin. "I will bet that…Ron and George will be pissed no question, but not Harry or Percy. However, we can't discount Percy. He does have a lot of pent up tension and all it might take is one drink. Now Bill...he's a wild card. A pregnant wife can be a bit scary, but he's the eldest so he might be able to hold his own. What do you think?" Hermione finished looking at Ginny who was staring at her as if she was reciting a complicated arithmancy problem.

"So wait, you think Harry will be the only sober one, is that it?"

Hermione nodded and Ginny laughed out loud. She couldn't help but smile widely at the sound as it was so close to Ron's laugh and it touched her heart to hear it, especially after night they just had.

"Hermione, I will take that bet, and win," she said and opened the door shaking her head and laughing. They walked inside and into the brightly lit, but now empty, kitchen.

...

A/N: I love Ginny. She says what's on her mind and is quick with a retort, but I feel like she also holds a lot in and masks her feelings behind sarcasm and wit. I also like to believe that Hermione and Ginny share their own bond, both not wanting to deal with all that girly nonsense and both in love with two best friends.

If anyone is confused about why Hermione didn't catch a fit when Ron left or when Ginny was having a meltdown this is because I see Hermione as evolving throughout this story from when I started. If it wasn't for Ron she would be going off the rails so some improvement was necessary on her part.

Also, next chapter will focus on Ron with his brothers and Harry with more angst about Fred, but don't get too used to it. Although I feel Fred's death and George's grief is necessary in any post DH story, I don't want to make it a central part in this one. His death affects everyone and will for a long time, but this story is mainly about Hermione's anxiety and Ron coping with it and his own set of issues.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not a male, nor do I drink so needless to say writing five blokes drinking at a pub was quite a challenge. It was fun, but not easy. Also, there are no lemons in this one. Even I need a break from the smut once in a while! There is some RHr sweetness, though, so don't fret!
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

Ron apparated behind the joke shop, directly in front of the back door that led to George's flat. He knocked loudly only to be met with silence. He tried opening the door with his wand, but quickly realized, after getting no result, that George must have put a new locking spell on it.

"Shit," Ron hissed into the empty alleyway. He walked around to the side of the building and cupped his hands over his eyes, pressing his nose to the glass to squint into the shop window. Inside was dark and had an unfamiliar coldness to it that Ron was not used to. The last time he saw the shop was before the war. It was bright and alive then; sounds bursting from the windows and doors unable to contain the excitement that was held within. Now all he heard were the distant sounds of the usual crowd of witches and wizards out and about on a Friday night visiting the pubs and shops that were open on Diagon Alley.

Weasley's Wizard Wheezes was always packed with people, old and young, all looking for something strange and fun to buy and show their friends and family. Fred and George were always there, front and center, to help anyone and everyone; selling trick wands and pygmy puffs to those who didn't even know they wanted one. Now there was not a soul to be found inside the shop that was usually bursting at the seams with customers.

"Come on, George, where are you?" Ron muttered to himself as he walked back to the door and tried, for the second time, pounding on George's flat door. He knew after the first knock that George wasn't home. He didn't know why he kept trying, except for the fact that he was stalling. He wrung his hands as he thought about what he was going to say once he caught up with him.

_Hey, perk up George, we can't stand to see you moping around anymore. It's right depressing, mate… Fuck, I'm bloody rubbish at this. I should have told Bill or Percy to go instead. George doesn't need a prat like me telling him shit he already heard a hundred times in the past three months._

Ron sighed, defeated, as he knew his attempts would be refuted. George wasn't home. He walked around the building toward the noise on Diagon Alley to search the streets-and possibly the pubs-for his brother, who probably just wanted to be left alone, when he heard a series of cracks coming from behind him. He felt a hand on his shoulder and whipped his wand out faster than he thought he could, and turned around, aiming to hex whatever moved.

"Blimey, Harry! What the fuck, mate?" Ron breathed out, his voice shaking, and pocketed his wand.

Harry had his hands up in surrender with Percy and Bill behind him pocketing their own wands. Ron swallowed thickly and took a deep breath. He was never happier to see his best mate and brothers.

"It's just us," Harry said, putting his wand away. "Figured you and George could use a little company. Nice reflexes, by the way."

"So I take it George isn't home, then?" Bill asked stepping up beside Harry and peering up at the same dark windows of George's flat that Ron was just staring at just moments ago. The same look of disappointment that Ron had was on Bill's face.

"Er, no, he's not. I tried…twice. The shop is closed as well," said Ron, gesturing toward the dark shop windows.

"Right, I think I know where to find him," Bill sighed and waved Percy to join them. "Meet me at the north end of High Street in Hogsmeade." With that he disapparated with a loud crack.

The three of them looked at eachother then followed suit, each of them apparating to Hogsmeade, a small village, notunlike Diagon Alley as the store were open and people were walking about enjoying the warm night.

"You alright?" Harry said in a low voice, falling into step next to Ron as they started walking towards Bill up ahead, his tall form waving them forward. Percy caught up with Bill first, leaving Ron and Harry to walk a few steps behind them.

"What are you on about?" Ron asked distractedly, watching as his brothers whispered back and forth with each other. He wondered if they followed him just for the company or if it was because they didn't believe Ron could handle George on his own. He reminded himself that just a moment ago he was, in fact, stalling in an alleyway not knowing where to go and what to say if he ever did find George. He should feel grateful they were there as it took some of the pressure off of him, and he was, but that didn't stop the usual self doubt from creeping in.

"I mean, the way you left..." Harry said. "Hermione looked worried as well. She asked me to tell you something."

At the mention of Hermione's name Ron saw her small face and bushy hair flash across his brain and felt a clenching in his chest. Some of the negative feelings that had started to flood his brain were dammed just by image of her alone. Then he found himself imagining her face close to his as they kissed, the way her nose crinkled during an orgasm, her mouth on his – he shook his head to clear it and fixed Harry with a glare.

"What is it? Is she alright?"

"Yeah, she's fine…" Harry said as he ducked his head and peered over the top of his glasses. "I should have worn a bloody hat," Harry mumbled as a group of witches passed by and started whispering and pointing in their direction.

Relieved that nothing was wrong with Hermione, Ron looked up and blushed as he saw the same witches smiling at him and giggling. He wasn't used to the attention and found he didn't fully hate it.

"Come  _on_ ," Harry said, pulling Ron along as he busied himself with smoothing his hair over his forehead. They walked faster to catch up with Bill and Percy who were standing outside a dodgy looking pub. Looking up at the sign Ron recognized it as The Hog's Head Inn.

"Ah yes, of course George would be in the dirtiest filthiest pub known to wizard kind," Percy said with a face that looked like he just bit into a bogey flavored bean.

"Yes, well, I found George here once before about a month ago so it's the next logical place," Bill said with a grimace then shrugged and turned to open the door.

"Perfect," Harry breathed out and smiled, entering the pub gratefully. A gust of smoke and the smell of sweat and firewhiskey hit them in the face before they ambled in after him. It was darker inside than it was outside so Ron could see the appeal that Harry saw in the place. Three red heads and Harry Potter walking down Hogsmeade was catching too much attention. Inside the Hog's Head, at least, they were relatively hidden within the thick cloud of smoke and dust.

"Oh, what did Hermione say, Harry?" Ron said pulling Harry aside while Bill and Percy looked for George.

"Oh, she said…don't be a prat…" Harry said looking at the ground as if trying to remember, then snapped his fingers and pointed at Ron and said, "No, that you're not a prat. That's important, I suppose. I happen to hold a different opinion, but this is her message…"

"Harry – "

"And…to not to avoid anything. Does this make sense to you?"

Ron remembered Hermione saying those same words that very morning. It felt like so long ago, but he could hear her voice in his head and felt a calm wash over him. She knew this was difficult for him and wanted to remind him that he was doing the right thing by being there for his brother; for his family. He let her words sink in and smiled with a new confidence.

"Yeah, thanks, Harry," Ron said with a nod.

"Okay," Harry said, nodding his head slowly then pointed. "Look, there's George. Bill, Percy, he's here," Harry called out and waved them over.

"Good eye, Harry," Percy said glancing sideways at a bloke who was standing too close to him wearing chains around his neck that were attached to his belt. "Let's get him and get out of here, yeah?"

Ron peered through the haze to where Harry spotted George. Sure enough, there was his brother sitting at a small round table, alone with a half empty bottle of firewhiskey and an empty shot glass in front of him. He had his chin in his hand and was twirling the glass on its edge, watching as it teetered and spun until it sat back on its bottom. Then he picked up the firewhiskey, poured a shot and drank it in one gulp.

"Blimey," Ron said and looked at Harry who looked at Ron at the same time. "Didn't he just get here? He's already down half a bottle."

"Alright, ladies," Bill said and regarded Ron, Harry and Percy. Ron scoffed, but Bill ignored him, looking at his watch. "It's still early. The last time I found him like this it took me a few hours to get him home. We can't just ambush him, got it?" He glared at Percy who rolled his eyes and nodded his head.

Seeing George like this made Ron realize just how sad and hollow his brother must be feeling without his twin. He missed Fred terribly every day, but he knew it must be a hundred times worse for George. It wasn't fair that the twins were ripped apart in such a tragic way. He once again felt an anger build inside; at Voldemort, the deatheater who killed Fred and…at himself. No matter what Hermione told him about it not being his fault he knew he would never be able to forgive himself. Then he realized if he felt this way then George must be feeling the exact same guilt ten times over.

With that last thought on his mind he found himself moving toward his depressed looking brother who had just downed yet another shot of firewhiskey. Ron grabbed a chair, sat down heavily right next to George and grabbed the empty glass swiftly from his hand.

"What the – Ron!" George yelled indignantly at first then opened his mouth in surprise.

"George! Fancy meeting you here," Ron said conversationally. His heart was thumping in his chest, but he looked George squarely in the eyes.

George looked almost happy to see him for a second then frowned and snatched the glass back. "Har har…I know why you're here so you can bugger off," he said flatly and poured another shot. By this time Harry, Bill and Percy had made their way over to the table and were grabbing chairs to sit.

"Oh look, the cavalry's all here. Did mum send you?" George slurred and waved his hand with the filled glass, spilling a few drops on the table.

Ron didn't know what took over him, but when he saw George ready to drink he reached out once more and took it back, firewhiskey spilling on both their hands. Before Ron could second guess himself he tipped the glass to his lips and drank it in one gulp. He slammed the glass down on the table, hacking and coughing as the alcohol burned his throat and hit his chest.

"Holy fuck!" Ron gasped and coughed as he pounded on his chest and his body shook as a chill ran down his spine.

"Ron, what the hell?" he heard Bill say and felt Harry patting his back.

"Good one, Ron. You really showed him," Harry muttered.

"Shut it, Harry," Ron croaked and cleared his throat. "Fuck, I forgot how that burns."

He looked up as George started laughing uncontrollably. "Oh, Ron! That was…hilarious. We would have taken you out drinking sooner if we – we would have…" He suddenly got quiet and his face turned stony just as suddenly, staring at the empty air right behind Ron's shoulder.

Ron looked around wide-eyed at his brothers who were watching George with concern, waiting for his next action.

"Hey," Percy said slowly and leaned forward to get George's attention. "Why don't we take you back to your flat. I'll stay with you, yeah? Or we can go back to my flat."

Ron watched as George moved his eyes to Percy, his face still blank then he broke out in a laughing fit all over again. "Percy! Oh, you are a wanker aren't you?" He slurred his words as he reached for the bottle of firewhiskey that Bill was holding just out of reach. "Oi! Bill, you're a wanker, too. Not as much as our dear…dear brother, Perce…Percy-Perce. Prefect Percy, eh?" He giggled, giving up on getting the bottle back from Bill, then turned stony again pointing a quivering finger at Percy. Ron glanced at Percy who was watching George with a calm expression. He didn't know how Percy could always stand to always remain in control all the time. Even with the firewhiskey burning in his chest Ron still felt anxious. He's never seen George like this before and it was doing his head in.

"But, Fred…" George continued, "…he always told me to forgive you. You're lucky he liked you, you… perfect prefect fucking…Percy-Perce." He giggled at his garbled alliteration.

"Well" Percy said, blowing out a long breath and sitting back in his chair. "Good to know, I guess?"

"Damn…right," George grinned. "Fred loved everybody! And everybody loved Fred…It should have been me. Would have been better off, eh?"

"Oi!" Ron exclaimed and leaned forward to look at George. He lowered his voice and said, "Don't ever say that, George. That's a fucked up thing to say."

"But it's true! Wouldn't you rather have good 'ol Fred here instead? He was the better one…the fucking arsehole," George muttered then drank directly from the bottle, not bothering with the glass.

"We would rather have both of you here, you know that," Percy said softly, staring at the table. "It isn't natural, to have one without the other, is it? I wish I had more time…I- I just miss him."

"Me, too," Harry said. Ron looked over at him and their eyes locked. He could tell Harry was trying to apologize with a look, but Ron just stared back, frowning, wanting to tell him that it wasn't his fault. He wanted to say that it was his fault, but then figured George would probably chime in with his own faults and soon they would all be playing the blame game.

"I think," Ron said slowly, looking around the table, "that it's really fucked up what happened. I think that it's going to take a long time, probably never, to feel…I dunno…normal? We'll always miss him. I don't want to ever not miss him."

"Really poetic, little brother. Makes me want to cry," George mumbled before raising the bottle to his lips once more. Ron knew George was masking his feelings behind firewhiskey and rudeness, but he couldn't deny that it hurt.

Bill yanked the bottle from George again before he could take a sip then drank a large gulp from it. "Shit, that does burn, yeah?" Bill said smacking his lips then passed the bottle to Percy who took it tentatively. "You know what George?" Bill continued as George slumped back in his chair. "You and Fred were both arseholes if you ask me. Two prats in a fucking pod."

Ron was stunned as he stared at Bill then heard a loud snort come from George. Then he heard a chuckle next to him and turned to look at Harry who was trying to cover his smile.

"Fuck you, Bill," George said then burst out laughing. "Prats in a pod…brilliant."

Soon they were all laughing hysterically and passing the bottle around, each taking a swig. It wasn't long until they finished George's already half filled bottle before Bill got up to get more.

"I'm glad we had this talk, Georgie," Percy said with a sloppy grin on his face.

"So, Percy, it doesn't take much to get you pissed does it?" Harry said then hiccupped. "Same for me, too, I reckon."

Ron was about to retort before Bill came back with another bottle and four more glasses. "Right, ladies," he said and sat down, lining the five glasses in front of him and pouring the amber liquid into each one. "Drinking from a bottle like a hobo is fine and all, but let's, as my lovely wife would say, class it up shall we? Pinkies out, then."

They each took their own glass and raised it in front of them in the center of the table.

Ron, with liquid courage running through his veins, cleared his throat and said, "To Fred, may he raise hell up there or…if not up there then shoot some fireworks up from below."

He was met with silence and looked at everyone and shrugged. It was the best he could think of and it had sounded a lot better in his head.

"To Fred! The fucker!" George suddenly shouted and clinked his glass against the others before swallowing his drink in one gulp. Ron grinned and followed suit, the firewhiskey going down a lot easier than before.

"To Fred," Harry and Bill said in unison and threw back their shots, which left Percy with his arm still outstretched.

"Go on, Percy. You're with family. We won't tell your Ministry colleagues you had more than one drink, you know," Bill said wiggling his eyebrows.

"Okay, here goes. To you, Fred. We love you, brother," Percy said and, without another moment's hesitation, gulped the drink down, slammed it on the table and stuck his tongue out.

"Hit me again," Harry said holding his glass out to Bill. Ron quirked his eye brow at him.

"Shut it, Ron. I deserve it," he said while absentmindedly fixing his hair again over his scar.

"Ginny will be so proud,' Ron muttered.

"No," Harry said then threw back his shot, shaking his head as the alcohol made its way through his body. "Ginny will be so jealous," he said with a grin.

"Damn right you deserve it, Harry," George yelled, slamming his hand down on the table. "You fought that fucker and lived. Not everyone can say that, you know. Not Fred…"

"Oi! None of that," Ron said when he saw George about to tear up. He held his glass out for more firewhiskey and said, "He'll smack your head if he saw you choke up every time you say his bloody name."

Somewhere in the back of his mind he felt like he forgetting something. Hermione's voice popped into his brain as he threw back his third shot. There was something about talking and not avoiding something. Ron shook his head to clear it and looked around the small table and through his hazy mind felt an enormous amount of gratitude for his brothers, including Harry. He stared at George's face. Ron's near double vision made it seem like there were two of him, as if Fred was almost there with them. That thought, which should have made him even more depressed, seemed to energize him.

"Oi, George," Ron yelled over the noise of the pub.

"Yeah, Ronniekins?"

Ron ignored the terrible nickname and said, "Tell us…a funny story with you and Fred. Something we never heard before."

"Ron," Percy muttered beside him looking worried.

"No," Harry said inching to the edge of his chair and almost falling off before catching himself and sitting up. "Shit. I mean no, I want to hear it, too."

"One drink too many, Harry?" Ron said sniggering in his hand.

"Shut it, Ron."

"A funny story…with Fred," George said with his chin in his hands. Then he grinned and stood up knocking his chair over.

"Easy, George," Bill said and got up to right his chair. Ron noticed Bill didn't seem wobbly at all, but before he could question Bill's level of sobriety, all thoughts went to George who started talking animatedly.

"I got one. Oh it's good," George chuckled. "So okay…It was a Friday night, like tonight, right? And we were at Honeydukes filling up on sweets. So Fred sees this bird…she's fit. I mean, well not that fit, but fit enough for Fred. Anyway, so he gets this grand idea to buy the biggest, most colorful-est er…round thing on a stick?"

"Lollipop?" Bill said flatly. Ron and Harry glanced at each other and chortled, already enjoying the story.

"Yes! Thanks big bro. So he gets this gigantor lollipop and he insists we follow her. Oh and she had a friend. Now she was ugly. Sorry, she was! …Where was I?" he asked and picked up the bottle of firewhiskey, taking a drink from it.

"One fit and one ugly bird walking down the street…Oh and the lollipop," Harry spoke up, clearly enthused, and took the bottle from George and pouring him and Ron another shot.

"Don't wet yourself, Potter," Ron teased, giggling uncontrollably at his enormous wit, not caring if it made sense or not. Then he laughed even louder when Harry attempted to punch his arm and missed, almost falling out of his chair again.

"Right, so we're following them and there's Fred…with his fucking lollipop and he says…he says," George is holding his stomach, he's laughing so hard, "he yells out, scaring the shit out of them, 'Oi! No not you, the fit one!' and I'm just losing it. He's waving that damn lollipop around like a fucking flag trying to get her attention. So she turns around and says, 'Are you following me?' So he says, 'If I was would you find that flattering?' and she goes 'Er... How old are you? 12?'"

They're all laughing and George has tears running down his face.

"But why did she think he was 12? Because of a lollipop? Sounds like a daft bird, if you ask me," Ron asked.

"Because…" George let out a loud laugh and a hiccup and said through his giggles, "Because earlier…we were at the shop and he pulled a prank on me…made all my fucking hair disappear. I was bald in front of everyone. Only for a few hours, mind you, but I had to get him back. So when he said he wanted to follow that bird and I saw him with that ridiculous looking lollipop…walking down the street…I found my chance."

"George, get a grip and tell us already!" Bill said, laughing.

"I…I used my wand to write a message on the front of his shirt. Oh, Fred, please forgive me, brother" George said, with his hands together and looking at the ceiling, then was off into another peel of laughter.

"I'm going to have to agree with Bill," Percy said. "You need to get on with it. What did you write?"

"I…I wrote 'I Sleep With a Night Light' …but that was stupid. The best part was…before she turned around I had shrunk him…just a bit! Oh, when he saw how much taller I was than him…it looked like I was out with my little brother! He was fucking livid. Then he saw the shirt and chased me down the street trying to whack me with that huge…fucking…lollipop. Oh my god, that was funny as shit!"

They were all in stitches, laughing uproariously. The image of a shrunken Fred, running after George with a silly t-shirt and a lollipop down the street repeated over and over in Ron's head.

"Holy shit, that's hilarious! I can't believe you did that!" Ron bellowed, his own eyes watering. He and Harry could not stop laughing.

"Oh my goodness, that is funny," Percy said giggling into his hand.

Bill stood up and clapped George on the back and said, "Remind me never to mess with your precious hair, alright?"

They all laughed again as the bottle made another round.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"Do you think he's sleeping or just passed out?"

"I dunno, kick his leg."

"Oh for heaven's sake, of course he's passed out. Look at the drool."

Ron looked over at Harry and realized Percy was right. There was a fair amount of drool coming from Harry's mouth. He grimaced and looked away to George who was smirking while hanging on Bill's shoulder.

"Just leave 'im there. Ginny would just love to take care of 'im."

Ron pushed him, almost knocking him off of Bill and yelled, "Oi! That's bloody disgusting!"

"Where the fuck is your mind at…you wanker? Pervy much?"

Bill righted George and rolled his eyes. "Shut it, you two! We have to get him back home. Ron, pick him up."

"Why do I have to-"

"Because he's your best mate."

"Well…I can't carry him. I'm almost passing out m'self. I can't see two feet in front of me."

"Bugger. Alright, Percy, come with me so you can stay with George at his flat. I'll be back for…you two."

"Well don't say it like that. Like we're bloody…toadstool droppings," Ron scoffed then tried to think if there was such a thing as toadstool droppings…

"Just stay here with Harry and don't let him…go anywhere, yeah?"

"Oh sure, he looks like he's going to run away any minute," Ron said sarcastically and stumbled toward Harry.

"Come on, Perce," Bill said, ignoring Ron. Percy took George's other arm and hooked it over his shoulders.

"Percy, I'm glad you came out with us. You're a…good brother," George slurred then kissed Percy sloppily on the cheek.

"Nice," Percy said. "You smell like a toilet, George."

"Love you, too," George grinned and licked Percy's cheek.

"Urgh! Bill…Why can't we sober him up now?"

"Relax, Percy, we just have to get him home and he'll be out in minutes. It's better this way, so he can sleep some of it off. Then you can make him sober in the morning. Be glad he's not yelling and throwing things like last time."

"Right, up we go George," Percy said and helped Bill stand him up. Bill then took out his wand and disapparated them all in one loud crack.

"Fucking hell," Ron muttered and glanced at Harry who was slumped in a padded booth inside the Hog's Head. His head was propped up against the wall and his trainers dangled off the edge of the seat sideways. Ron threw himself into the seat across from him and peered around the empty pub. He never saw the place without its usual mix of dodgy patrons. He also never saw it tilt and turn the way it was doing in front of his eyes. He closed his eyes and tried to guess what time it was. He reckoned it must be later than he thought. Then he remembered Aberforth coming out and closing the pub just for them, telling everyone else to go home. It must have been around the time someone finally recognized Harry and they were ambushed with questions and shaking hands. It was all a blur, but Ron was thankful for Dumbledore's brother, not for the first time.

"Gin…oh yeah…just the top…it's okay…"

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Ron groaned and reached over with his long arm to smack Harry on the side of his head. "Oi! Wake up!"

"Eat…bollocks…fucking arse…hole…" Harry mumbled and turned in the seat so his cheek was resting on the wall and his legs were curled up into his body.

Ron didn't think Harry looked very comfortable, but decided he deserved a stiff neck. Besides, his own head was swimming as he fought to stay awake. He smirked as he thought about how much fun he had with Bill, Percy, George and Harry that night. They drank firewhiskey, listened to funny stories about Fred – which George seemed to be in endless supply of – and he vaguely recalled singing, but that was right after everyone else left. The rest of the night was a blur of shouting, laughing and…dancing on a table? That night was about Fred, but it also felt like the first step in becoming closer to his brothers after such a tragic loss. He knew they were far from being healed, but he felt like a bit of anxiety got chipped away at that night.

As Ron drifted off to sleep he tried to remember if he let anything slip about Hermione and the past week, but couldn't recall anything detrimental.

"Alright, toadstools, let's get you back home, yeah?" Ron heard Bill's voice and jerked awake. He opened his eyes to find his oldest brother looking down at him with a broad grin on his face and something else in his eyes.

"What the hell you looking at?" Ron groaned as he pushed himself up to sit.

"Just my little brother, looking all grown up…and pissed. I'm glad I got to see it is all. We have to appreciate the little things, don't we?" he grinned as he grabbed Ron's hand and helped pull him to his feet.

Ron studied him for signs of sarcasm, but thought he looked sincere so he just shrugged and said, "Yeah, I s'pose. Hey, why aren't you pissed? Do that sobering thing on me. My head is killing me and I feel like I'm gonna puke."

"Yeah I'll do it, but under one condition."

Ron rolled his eyes and saw the room spin so he closed them quickly. "Whatever, anything."

"Don't tell mum about tonight. I don't want her thinking I let you guys get pissed under my watch."

Ron peered at him, confused. "But…you did."

"I know that," Bill snapped and took out his wand, tapping it on his leg. "Just don't tell mum. Do we have a deal or not?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just sober me up. Hermione will kill me before mum does, anyway."

"You might be right about that." Bill chuckled and raised his wand to Ron's temple and muttered, "Purus sobrius."

Ron instantly felt a cool sensation, like a bucket of not so cold water wash over his head and seep into his head, clearing it completely. He blinked a few times and the pub came into sharper focus.

"Brilliant, thanks," he breathed out and stretched his arms and legs, finally able to feel his fingers and joints again.

"No problem,' Bill said. "Listen, before I woke you Aberforth told me we have five minutes to clear out or we make our bed here."

Ron looked around the dingy pub and over at Aberforth who was cleaning out dirty glasses with a holey and stained rag behind the bar. He saluted Ron with the grease smeared cloth and Ron nodded back before turning to Bill.

"Right, let's go," he said nervously and moved toward Harry's sleeping form. His glasses were askew on his face as his cheek was plastered to side of the seat, and his mouth was open.

"Look at him," Ron said with a chuckle and shaking his head. "Savior of the wizarding world right there…drooling in a pub."

"Fuck off, Ron," he heard Harry groan.

"Alright, up you go," Bill said as he and Ron pulled Harry up to sit.

"I don't wanna go to bed. I wanna see the fireworks," Harry mumbled with his eyes half closed.

"Damn, Harry. How much did you drink, mate?" Ron laughed as he fixed his glasses and helped Bill stand him up. Harry then turned to Ron and threw his arms around his neck in a heavy hug, his body weight hanging from Ron's neck.

"Oof! Harry-"

"I love you, Ron! You're…the best mate….ever. Not like Ginny, 'course," he giggled and pulled away, gripping Ron's shoulders. His face was so close to Ron could smell the firewhiskey on Harry's breath. He glanced at Bill for help, but was annoyed to see him holding his stomach and laughing quietly into his hand.

"Yeah, Harry…I…me, too. Let's go, yeah?" Ron tried to pry Harry's fingers from his shirt, but Harry continued, his watery eyes boring into Ron's.

"Same as Hermi…but you, Ron you're like…like a brother, y'know?" He shook Ron's shoulders and Ron had to turn away from Harry's toxic breath. "A brother…because my mum had red hair, but that doesn't mean she was yer mum. Yer mum is like my mum cuz she 's got red hair…not saying your mum is really mine…b'cause then Ginny would be my sister and that's just…wrong. What I'm saying is-"

"Purus sobrius."

Harry let go and stumbled back away from Ron, shaking his head and looking around him slowly.

"Thanks," Ron said sarcastically and glared at Bill who shrugged his shoulders.

"Bloody hell, what happened? Are we still here?" Harry said looking between Ron and Bill then groaned. "Oh no, did I do anything embarrassing?"

Ron and Bill glanced at each other and smirked. "No worries, mate," Ron said as he draped his arm over Harry's shoulder and led him outside. "I can barely remember half the night so it doesn't matter much, does it?"

"Blimey, it's almost…three in the morning," Bill said. "Let's say we make to the Burrow for some sleep before mum starts with breakfast, yeah?" Bill took out his wand, ready to disapparate, when Harry stopped him.

"Hey, thanks, Bill. For sobering us up. You won't tell Mrs. Weasley, will you?"

"No, and that is exactly what I told Ron. As far as I'm concerned we found George and spent the night reminiscing over old photos and fell asleep. Understood?"

Ron and Harry glanced at each other and nodded. Ron knew Harry hated lying to his mum, and so did he, but they both knew it was necessary this one time to spare her the worry of her sons going out and getting pissed beyond memory.

"Understood," Harry said. Then all the three of them, sober as the day they were born, disapparated to the Burrow.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Ron looked up at the Burrow and sighed. Every window was dark except one. Ginny's window was flickering with a faint orange light, as if there was candle lit, but was down to its last two inches of wax. He figured Ginny and Hermione must have stayed up late waiting for them and instantly felt bad for making them worry. One glance at Harry told him he was thinking the same thing.

"They must have fallen asleep with the light on," Harry said and shrugged. He gestured for Ron to follow him and Bill as they made their way up to the back door.

"On your toes, alright, Ron?" Bill whispered before opening the door with a small creak.

"Why are you only telling me?" Ron whispered back and frowned at Bill while Harry closed the door with a small click and locked it.

"Because you walk like an elephant, that's why," Bill whispered, glancing around the kitchen. "I think everyone's asleep. Just go to bed. I'm going up to find Fleur and sleep. Night, ladies." He winked at them then left Ron and Harry in the dark kitchen alone.

"I really hate it when he calls us that. It's so…belittling," Ron muttered. "And I do not walk like a bloody elephant."

"Well you sure sound like one. Keep your voice down," Harry hissed and led the way out of the kitchen into the living room. "Oh," he said and turned around to look at Ron.

"What is it?" Ron whispered and peered over Harry's head into the living room.

"Oh," he breathed out and stared at Hermione who was fast asleep on the sofa, curled up on her side with one hand almost touching the floor where a book laid as if it had dropped from her hand. Half of her face was covered with her long dark curls, some of them rippling away from her face as she breathed out, her light snores filling the room. Ron felt his heart leap in his chest at the sight, both from guilt and adoration. He smiled as she made a moaning sound in her sleep and her hand twitched. She looked so peaceful that he hated having to wake her.

"I'm going to er…check on Ginny. Make sure that candle goes out. Don't want any fires…" Harry whispered.

Ron looked over at Harry, almost forgetting he was there. "Yeah, sure. I'm just going to wake her and help her upstairs. Do you think…" he said, rubbing his neck and glancing at Harry hoping his meaning was getting across.

He knew he could count on Harry because he felt him squeeze his shoulder and say, "No problem, mate. I'll just kip in Ginny's room tonight. Hey it was a good night, yeah?"

Ron smiled at Harry's grin and nodded. Not for the first time Ron was glad to have his best friend and the love of his life in one room. They were all very lucky to be alive. He took a deep breath and grabbed Harry in a hug. "It was. Thanks, mate," was all he could say as he felt a lump form in his throat.

"Alright there, Ron?" Harry said with a chuckle as he hugged Ron back just as tight. They held each other for a few seconds more before Ron pulled away and punched Harry lightly on the shoulder, his face burning and cleared his throat.

"Yeah, I'm alright. I just…you know."

"Yeah, I know," Harry said and punched him back. "'Nite, Ron."

"'Nite Harry," Ron said quietly and watched as he walked up the dark stairs and listened to Ginny's door open and close.

"That was so sweet."

Ron swung his head around and smiled at Hermione who was sitting up on the sofa wiping her eyes.

"Why are you crying, Hermione?" Ron asked as he walked over and sat next to her. He realized how much he missed her in those hours he was gone as he stared into her face in the dark room, the only light coming from another one of her blue flame jars on the coffee table. He reached out a hand and swiped a tear from her cheek and felt her smile under his hand.

"You and Harry…I just love both of you so much and seeing you like that was so wonderful. You're wonderful, Ron." She stared back at him and his breath was taken away. He had to remind himself to swallow and smiled back at her.

"Hermione…when you look at me like that it's like…I feel like I can't do anything wrong. We both know that's not true," he said with a chuckle and smiled widely as she giggled.

"That may not be true, but you are still wonderful, to me," she said and stroked his cheek. He could feel his rough stubble rough against her small smooth hand. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.

"I need to shave," he whispered and opened his eyes when he heard her giggle again.

"Not yet. I like it just like this," she said and kissed his left cheek softly then his chin and lastly to his right cheek, all the time sliding her soft lips across his prickly skin. His hands moved to cover her hands that were resting on his shoulders and squeezed them.

"Did you have a good night?" Hermione asked after pulling away and sliding her hands down his arms. He was finding it difficult to concentrate while she touched him and also because he was dead tired.

"Yeah, we found George and…talked. Got some things out and…it was good," he said with a nod.

"That's great," Hermione said and intertwined her fingers with his in his lap. "I'm glad you were able to sort some things out. Was it better with your brothers and Harry with you?"

"Yeah, it was. At first I thought they were there to make sure I didn't muck it up, but it was great, really. We had…fun." Ron grinned as he thought back to the previous hours of Harry making a fool of himself and George's drunken stories.

"Did you…drink tonight?" Hermione asked, her tone indicating she already knew the answer.

"Er...yeah. But don't tell my mum…or anyone. We don't want her to worry, you know." Ron said quickly and looked at her with his best apologetic face. He was surprised when Hermione only shook her head with a smile.

"I told Ginny you would. Tell me, did Harry drink, too?" She looked eager to know the answer so Ron figured it was best to be honest.

"Oh yeah, did he ever. He was pissed for sure," Ron said chuckling, remembering the last rambling Harry had slurred out before Bill sobered him up.

"Oh, darn. I bet Ginny he wouldn't."

"And you bet I would?" Ron said in mock surprise. He knew Hermione knew him well enough to know that he would drink. He also felt a small amount of smugness that she was wrong about Harry.

"Well, of course. You are Ron, aren't you?" she said rolling her eyes.

"So you're not upset with me?"

"No, I'm just glad you're back safe and sober. Bill's spellwork I presume?"

"The one and only. Thought he would hold out until the morning and let us come home pissed, but he's too scared of mum."

Hermione laughed softly and they just stared at one another in comfortable silence.

"So, how was it over here? How were mum and dad? And Ginny and Fleur?"

He saw Hermione hesitate then she smiled at him and said, "You mum went upstairs with your dad after you all left. Mr. Weasley came down to get her some tea, but they haven't been down since. Fleur also went upstairs. I think…I think they'll be alright."

Ron nodded solemnly and frowned. "That's good." He made a mental note to talk with his parents the next day about George and try to reassure them that they were going to be fine. He could at least let them know George was taken care of.

"How about Ginny?"

"Oh, you know Ginny…she's so strong and doesn't let much bother her. But, well…" Hermione trailed off and bit her lip.

"What is it? Did something happen?" Ron felt his head start to pound as he thought of his little sister and what could have happened with her. He knew Ginny was strong and self reliant. He also knew she was vulnerable at the same time and feels things just as strongly as he does. They were the same that way, which was why Ron was so worried.

"No, nothing happened," she said and Ron let his breath out. "She just sort of let out some steam. It was good for her. It was only us, no one else, so we just talked a lot and…she's really hurting, Ron. I know you all are, but she needs you especially. I see how close the two of you are and as much as I try she needs her brother. Do you know what I mean?"

Ron looked to the ground and thought about what Hermione just said. He was close with Ginny, now more than ever. He realized he wasn't just avoiding George, which was easy since he was hardly there, but he was also neglecting his sister. She was there with him every day since they came home and not once did he try talking to her about what happened.

"Thank you, for being there with her," Ron said rubbing his thumbs over her knuckles. "I'll talk to her. You're right, as always," he said with a sad smile.

"I wasn't looking to be right, Ron. I just want everyone to be happy," Hermione said turning her head to look in his eyes.

"Are you happy, Hermione?" Ron asked, looking at her. "Did you feel any anxiety or anything while I was gone?" He held his breath as he waited for her to answer.

"I…Well, I did, but noting too serious. I was so focused on Ginny and then we ate a lot of pudding and then I fell asleep so…no I suppose not," she said and beamed at him. He smiled and leaned in to kiss her.

"That's brilliant, Hermione," he said as he pulled away and gazed at her pink face. "That's really great."

"Yeah, so I was thinking that I don't have to see that healer after all. I mean, there isn't a point to it anymore, is there?" she said quickly biting her lip, but Ron could feel a strong stubbornness coming off of her. He was too tired and he didn't want to fight with her. If she said she was getting better who was he to push something like this on her? It was her decision and he will just have to respect that.

"No, I don't see why you should," he said.

She smiled widely and stood up, holding her hand out for Ron to join her. He stood up with her and pulled her into a warm hug. Her small body fitted neatly into his, just as he remembered.

"I missed you," he whispered into her hair and bent down to kiss her head.

"Missed you, too. Ginny and I stayed up until midnight, but she didn't want to fall asleep down here. I didn't want to miss when you came home so I stayed. I'm glad I did." She hugged him tighter around his middle and he exhaled as he smoothed his hands over her hair, his fingers dipping into her unruly, but soft curls.

"Me, too. Hey, do you want to sleep in my room tonight? Harry is in Ginny's room so…"

Hermione pulled back slightly to look up at Ron and smiled. "Yeah, I'm knackered. I'm sure you are as well. Let's go to bed," she said and put out the blue flame. She pulled him by the hand up the stairs. He followed behind her, his eyes feeling heavy, but open enough to appreciate her bum as she climbed the stairs in front of him. Her short cotton pajama bottoms were tight against her body and Ron noticed how the fabric would delve into the middle of her bum with every step she took. He was so mesmerized by it that he didn't notice they were at his door until she stopped to open it and he almost walked right into her.

"Sorry, dark stairs," he muttered and blushed when she looked back at him with a knowing expression. He followed her inside and closed the door before locking and silencing it under his breath. When he turned around Hermione was already climbing into his bed and under the covers. She propped her head up on her hand and turned to look at him as he stood in the middle of the room.

"Aren't you going to get undressed for bed?" she said smirking at him.

"Right," Ron said and kicked his trainers off, sending them across the room as he slid his shirt off his head. His trousers were off last before he jumped into bed, over Hermione, and burrowed under the covers.

Hermione giggled and turned around to snuggle up against him. "This is nice," she said as she trailed her fingers across his bare chest.

Ron moaned in agreement and wrapped his arm around her back and pulled her in closer, holding her tight to him so that she had to wrap her leg over his.

"Love you," Ron muttered and used his free hand to hook under her chin to look at him. He could just make out her dark eyes as she stared up at him and the white of her teeth as she smiled.

"Love you," she said then leaned even further up to kiss him softly on the lips. He pulled her face closer when she tried to back away and trapped her lips in a more heated kiss. He opened his mouth over hers and reached his tongue in, hungry for her taste. It was only a few hours, but he really did miss her. He missed her warmth, her touch, the taste of the inside of her mouth. He moved his hand from her face and grabbed the back of her neck so that he could kiss her more deeply. She moaned against his lips and he grinned, loving that sound more than any other sound she could ever make.

He felt her hands move up to his shoulders and then push him back, away from her.

"Sorry," she said breathlessly, her eyes blinking slowly up at him. "I'm just really…tired." She yawned loudly and cupped her hand over her mouth. Ron then yawned right after her and they both laughed. They were both so tired they could barely hold their eyes open.

"Sleep?" Ron whispered as he dropped his head down on his pillow, sighing contently at the coolness against the back of his neck.

"Oh, yes. Sleep," Hermione said snuggling in once more against his side and being pulled in closer by Ron's long arms.

"When we're both awake," Ron said and paused to yawn again, "I'm going to…do things to you, Hermione. Good things, too. Not just a snog, either. I'm talking hands and everything." He wiggled his fingers on her hip and yawned again. "Just watch."

He heard Hermione chuckle into his chest before yawning and he laughed deliriously. Even with the sobering charm, he could still feel the late night and firewhiskey making him feel incoherent and drowsy.

"I'll remind you tomorrow. Go to sleep, now," Hermione said softly and he felt her kiss his skin, her lips light as a feather, and fell asleep with a smile.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Ron and Hermione make some lemonade in this chapter. I don't usually do this, but I want to recommend a song. I listened to it while I was writing this particular smutty scene and I think it's very appropriate…or inappropriate depending on how you look at it. It's called "Touchin on My" by 3OH!3.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

It was a week since they returned to the Burrow and so much had changed since before Hermione and Ron left for Australia. Ron was helping George in the shop, cleaning and stocking shelves with new inventory. He also convinced Ginny to join him a few times and, according to Ginny, Ron encouraged her to open up about Fred and they were all closer for it. This statement made Hermione's heart swell with pride and she let Ron know this by way of sneaking into his room every night. Harry quickly figured out, after witnessing a rather heated snogging session, that he was better off sneaking into Ginny's room first and sending Hermione upstairs. Needless to say Ron was in a much better mood these days.

This arrangement resulted in Ginny revealing to Hermione - along with Hermione's sworn oath not to say a bloody word - that she and Harry had finally shagged. After finding this out Hermione didn't need an oath to keep silent. There was no way she would ever tell Ron that his best friend had done anything close to shagging his baby sister. She also confided in Ginny about Ron, although with a lot less details than Ginny was willing to share. They were becoming so close that Hermione finally felt like she had a sister, something she had always wanted since she was a child.

With Ron and Ginny gone most of the day Hermione and Harry were left to their own devices. They occupied their time between aiding Mrs. Weasley with household chores and Harry quizzing Hermione on everything they ever learned at Hogwarts. Harry was reluctant at first because it sounded too much like schoolwork, but soon it became a fun trivia game, which Hermione won every single time, of course. In return Harry would ask her to help him prepare for Auror training by practicing defensive and offensive spells on each other. Hermione was hesitant, but for reasons that she never told Harry. She did her best to help him while fighting the images of Ron – and sometimes Harry - on the other end of a wand, not putting up a shield in time, and getting hit with a hex, or worse. She was able to handle it in the beginning, but after a week of it she was ready to tear her hair out. Hermione got through it by reminding herself that she was doing much better with Ron away every day, not once feeling the usual anxiety associated with his absence. She was still immensely relieved every time he came home, but it wasn't to the degree that it was months prior.

Regardless, she had been feeling tense lately so when Ron announced after breakfast on Sunday morning that George gave him a reprieve for the day Hermione eagerly accepted his invitation to lay out on the grass and, as he put it, 'be completely and utterly lazy by doing absolutely nothing'.

It was a beautiful, sunless, sweat-free day; a relief from the sweltering heat that had permeated the summer in the past few months. Hermione's hands were resting on her belly and her legs were bent so that her bare feet sank into the overly grown, soft grass, tickling her toes as she wiggled them between the long blades. Her head was resting on Ron's bicep as his hands were tucked behind his head; his legs stretched out in front of him and crossed at the ankles. She knew this was Ron's attempt to help her relax and she thought it would work, but after what felt like hours she found it having the opposite effect and she was starting to feel antsy.

"See that one? That is definitely a hippogriff, wearing a top hat and holding a cane. Definitely," Ron said after a long silence, and pointed up at the white, blue dotted sky that was overwhelmed with masses of cotton-like cumulus clouds.

Hermione squinted and turned her head at an angle, trying to follow the path of his finger. Her eyes became so lost in the thick and puffy layers that it was hard to focus on just one shape.

"No," she said finally, shaking her head on the grass. "I just don't see it, sorry."

"Really?" Ron said incredulously. He took his arm out from under her head and stretched it out behind her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. Hermione bit her lip as he took her right elbow in his right hand and slid it up her arm, raising it up in the air. He leaned over so his cheek touched hers and closed one eye to peer up at their joined hands.

"See? Right there!" Ron exclaimed as he curled his fingers around hers, leaving both their forefingers out so that his overlapped hers. Her toes gripped the grass blades once more before she sighed and trained her eyes upward, trying once more to find the top-hat-wearing, cane-holding hippogriff.

"I don't…wait. No, it can't be," Hermione gasped then laughed out loud, staring at the sky with one eye closed.

"You see it, right?" he said and used their fingers to trace the outline of the cloud.

"Yes, but I wouldn't call it a hippogriff…it looks more like a centaur, maybe."

"Well, they both have a horse's ass…"

Hermione let her arm drop like a stone and leaned her head back to glare at Ron. "What did you just say?" she asked sharply.

"What?" Ron said, turning his head to look at her.

Seeing the confusion on his face, she said quickly, "Oh, nothing. Sorry," Hermione muttered and turned back to look at the sky. She felt silly for overreacting to what was obviously a joke.

"What is up with you lately?" Ron asked, sitting up and looking down at her with concern. Hermione was surprised as her head dropped to the grass.

"Excuse me?" she asked and pushed herself up to sit and turned to face him.

"You've been snappy all week. Is it because of me going to shop? Because George is paying me and I need the money. I thought you didn't have a problem with it."

"No," Hermione said quickly. "That's not it at all. You know how I get when it comes to centaurs and magical creatures. I didn't mean to bite your head off."

"Right, I understand that," he said, nodding, then added pointedly, "Now tell me what's really going on. Did I say or do something wrong before that I need to know about?"

"No, Ron," she said with a sigh, starting to feel frustrated. "It's nothing to do with you."

"Then what's the problem? Is it Harry or Ginny?" His face was starting to turn red and Hermione shook her head quickly.

"No, of course not. Nothing like that. I just have a lot on my mind, that's all," Hermione said and rubbed her temple.

"Like what, Hermione?

"Nothing major. Just worried about school and other things," she said with a shrug and plucked a long blade of grass from the ground, twisting it in her hands. That wasn't a complete lie. She was worried about going back to school, but she didn't want to start another row like the one they had in Australia about him becoming an Auror. She told herself that morning that she would enjoy the day with Ron and not show any signs of anxiety.

Ron, on the other hand, seemed to have other ideas. He snatched the grass from her hand and flicked it so it returned back to the ground. "Talk to me. What other things, Hermione?"

She glared at him and said, "I was using that."

"Alright," Ron said as he grabbed two large handfuls of grass in his hands and ripped them from the ground. He sprinkled them all over Hermione's lap and said with a wicked grin, "Is that enough?"

"What – You –" Hermione was at a loss for words as she stared down at her bare legs that were now littered with at least fifty blades of green grass. "That wasn't funny, Ron," she finally said, fuming, and stood up.

"You're right," he said as she bent over and shake them off. "You missed one near your ankle."

Hermione clicked her teeth as she bent lower to check her ankles when she heard Ron groan. She knew that sound immediately and looked at herself, noticing how much of her bra she was revealing to him. She stood up so fast that her hair whipped around her face. She pushed it back irritably and pointed her finger at Ron.

"You did that on purpose! Merlin, you're such a perv," Hermione said shaking her head and crossing her arms across her chest. She glared at Ron's smirking face and tried her best not to jump on him and snog him senseless for looking at her like that.

"Oh, stop," he said and reached out to pull her back down to kneel on the grass. She looked away and bit the inside of her cheek when he placed his hands on her waist. "You liked it. I can tell because your nose is all scrunched up and your cheeks are pink."

"Doesn't matter," she said shaking her head. "You're still a pervy prat."

"And you're positively gorgeous."

Hermione unfolded her arms and smacked his arm, laughing. "That's not fair. You can't say something like that after ogling me as if I'm a…a piece of meat."

"Meat's got nothing on you, Hermione."

"Oh my god," she groaned and rolled her eyes. "That was really cheesy, Ron. Even for you."

Ron shrugged and pulled her closer. "Yeah, I know," he said laughing. "That doesn't mean I'm lying."

Hermione blushed and said, "Well, thank you."

"Yeah," he said quietly, his expression softening as he moved his hands up and down her back. "So…did you want to talk about what's on your mind? You said something about school…"

"Oh, right," Hermione said and chewed her lip. She had also mentioned 'other things', but she wasn't going to remind him. His hands felt amazing and she had to shake her head to keep from getting lost in his touch. "Just the usual worries such as school work, NEWTS, keeping up with everything...I'm also worried about going back there because…that's where it happened. So much fighting and death." She shivered as flashes of the final battle crossed her mind. Without a word Ron grabbed her hand and she knew he was thinking about Fred. She gave him her other hand and said, "I'm also going to miss you terribly. It's just a lot to think about."

He turned one of her hands palm up and, as he traced the indented lines in her hand, he said, "I get it. I hate thinking about September. I can't stand the thought of not seeing you every day. I'm going to miss you so fucking bad." He began running his fingers along the back of her hand and Hermione felt a shiver run down her spine. They were both staring at their hands, mesmerized.

"But you have to go because if you don't you're going to regret it and I'll never hear the end of it." Ron chuckled and Hermione smiled at the truthfulness of his words. "I just want us to be…normal."

"What is normal, Ron?" Hermione said softly and tore her eyes from their hands to look at his face.

He must have sensed her looking because he stilled his movements and lifted his head to look at her. His cool eyes blazed with meaning as he said, "We make our own normal. That's what normal is, Hermione. You and me…together like this…" he closed his eyes for a moment as if his emotions became too overwhelming. Hermione felt a lump form in her throat and didn't dare speak. He opened his eyes, and they were bright, and shined with a layer of moisture that she knew would not fall. "You know, for the first time, when I think about you I no longer feel like a useless git. You make me feel wanted and…loved. It feels bloody brilliant."

"Oh, Ron…" Hermione breathed. A tear fell from her eye as she reached out with her other hand to cup his cheek.

"I love you so fucking much it hurts. You know what I mean, yeah?" She could actually feel his heart from where she sat, open and honest and full of trust.

Hermione could only nod as her smile grew bigger and more tears fell. She moved in closer and Ron opened his long legs to let her in. She sat back, wrapped her legs around his waist, and leaned in to his chest to hear his actual heart thumping wildly. She felt Ron's arms tight around her shoulders and she squeezed him around his middle. Even sitting in a new position Hermione found that they fit together perfectly. Ron kissed her head and cleared his throat.

"Think of going to school as just a detour until we're together again," Ron continued. "Every time you're sitting in class, or studying in the library, or taking a test, just…think about me, alright. And when I'm at the shop, or at home, or away at training, I'll think about seeing you again."

"I think I can manage that," Hermione whispered and sighed contentedly. "I think I love you even more right now. That was a lot of good stuff you just said, Ron. Not cheesy in the least."

She could feel Ron chuckle before he slid his hands further down her back and his voice turned serious. "I meant every word. I want you to be happy and I want us together for…a very long time."

"Forever?" Hermione's cheeks heated up as she pulled back and looked up. She smiled as Ron also blushed and looked away shyly.

"Yeah, of course," he said then cleared his throat once more. "I mean, if that's what you want. I don't plan on ending things, do you?"

"Never."

"It's sorted then," he said with a quick nod. "You'll go to school and think about how bloody lucky you are to have me…" Hermione laughed and rolled her eyes. "…and I'll go through work and training obsessing and wanking over you."

Hermione laughed and shook her head, blushing. "Then what happens after that?" she asked as she played with the hem of his shirt. "I suppose I could…come back here. You'll still be at training when I get out of school. I don't fancy living with my parents. I belong in the wizarding world. I could stay here until you and Harry get out."

"Then we get a flat together and just be…normal."

"Oh," she said and took a deep breath as surge of excitement ran through her. She would be lying if she said she hadn't thought about moving in with him at some point, getting married, and eventually having children. It was already planned out in her head ever since she started having feelings for Ron. Her fantasies were all coming true and she was thrilled, but also scared. "What about money?" she asked. "How will we pay for things?"

"It won't be until the end of summer, but I'll have been placed as an Auror by then. Entry level, I assume, but it's a paying job. I'm sure with your marks you could land any career you want and you're going to stay here until I finish training." His face lit up and he grabbed her hands, excited. "I'll also be working for George before I leave and save every penny. I'll have enough for a flat as soon as I get back."

"No, I can't let you pay for it all yourself," Hermione said shaking her head. "I'll be working during the summer and will have saved up, too. I can help get a place. It's only fair."

Ron glared at her, puzzled and said, "I don't care about that. If I want to save my money to get us a flat I don't see why that's an issue. Let me do this one thing."

"Then it has to work both ways, Ron. Let me do this for us. If I want to contribute to our life together then why can't I?"

"I'm not saying all the time," Ron huffed. "Bloody hell, I just want to be the one to buy our first place, then after that we share everything. I promise. Can you please not be stubborn about this? Just this once, Hermione?"

Hermione stared into his eyes and knew that there was no use fighting the issue. If this is what he felt he had to do in order to prove himself she was not going to deny him that pride.

"Alright, fine. I think it's a brilliant idea. Let's do it," she relented.

"Really?" He beamed at her then frowned. "I was expecting more of an argument to be honest."

Hermione laughed and moved her foot to kick his bum. "Don't look so disappointed!"

"I'm not!" Ron exclaimed with a laugh. "I just have to get used to winning you over. My charm must finally be working, yeah?"

Hermione shrugged her shoulders and moved her hands through his hair and over his neck. "Maybe, just a little."

"Wicked."Ron smirked and Hermione could feel his hands on her back, under her shirt.

Hermione raised her hips and Ron pulled his legs together so she could sit on his lap. Hermione, now level with Ron's face, said quietly, "I love you, too." She squeezed her thighs against his waist and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Fuck yeah." Ron let out a moan and moved his hands to smooth over her sides. Hermione was grateful for the cool weather as she felt herself becoming warmer under his touch. She could feel him hard underneath her, stroking her through her shorts and knickers. It was all too much for Hermione and she felt like she was going to burst. She pulled his head to hers. Their lips and tongues snapped to one another's in a now familiar dance as they kissed eagerly. Her hips were gyrating n top of him, hands inside his shirt caressing his abdomen and chest.

"I'm gonna miss this the most," Ron muttered before sinking his lips on her neck. Hermione gasped as she felt his teeth nick the skin under her ear. She gathered her hair and moved it aside, allowing him to breathe as he buried his face further into her neck, licking and kissing gently on her tender skin.

"Oh god, that feels so good," Hermione breathed out, her eyes closed as her body rocked on top of him slowly and forcefully. She felt his hands cup her breasts through her bra, squeezing her gently at first then harder as her hips moved faster and the kisses along her neck turned to sucking and biting intermittently.

"Ron, we're outside," Hermione whispered then gasped as she felt his thumb flick over her bare nipple. He found his way inside her bra and was kneading her breasts, a task made easy with her fitting perfectly in his large hands.

"Who cares, don't stop moving," he mumbled then took his hands from her chest and planted them on her bum.

"Ron, please."

"Shit. Alright," Ron said, pulling back and Hermione slowed to a stop. Her heart felt like it was in her knickers as she sat there panting and licking her lips. She almost forgot why she stopped as Ron gazed at her with blatant lust.

"To the shed, then?" he said abruptly and Hermione nodded, not having to think twice. He stood up quickly, dumping Hermione on her bum on the grass. "Sorry," he said breathlessly and bent down to help her up. She giggled and, leaving their shoes behind, let him pull her toward the shed at a run.

They entered the shed and Hermione turned to watch as, with a quick look around outside, Ron closed the door.

"Shit, I forgot my wand," Ron said patting the pockets of his trousers.

Hermione took hers out of her pocket and handed it to him. "Here, use mine."

Ron took it and cast a locking and silencing charm on the door. Then he muttered a spell over his groin before tossing it on a shelf between a blender and a deck of cards. With her eyes locked on his, Hermione backed up to the corner of the shed until she felt the table hit her thighs. Ron was advancing on her, unfastening his trousers as he took long strides to reach her within seconds.

"No," she said suddenly, holding out one hand to stop him before he went to kiss her. "Let's wait for tonight and we can take our time and do it nice and slow."

"Are you fucking serious?" he asked just as his trousers made a soft thud when they hit the floor.

Hermione couldn't keep a straight face and smiled widely. "Not at all," she said as she reached out and hooked her fingers inside the waistband of his pants and pulled him closer. She laughed at his gobsmacked expression. "Oh, Ron. You should see your face."

"Shut it, woman. That wasn't very nice," he said then smirked with his hands on the button of her shorts. "You're going to pay for that one."

"Promise?"

Ron let out a low growl before unfastening her shorts and pushing them down to the floor along with her knickers and kicking them to the side. He lifted her easily by the waist and sat her, not so gently, on the tabletop. She watched, her whole body humming with desire, as he stepped out his trousers and pants. He stepped between her open legs and grabbed her around the waist, crushing his lips on hers. She kissed him back just as fiercely, their teeth clashing and biting the other's lip. Hermione moved closer to the edge of the table and felt Ron's hand on her, cool on her heated folds as they continued to kiss fiercely. She reached down and grabbed him, stroking his length, making him moan loudly into her mouth. Not wanting to let go for air they panted into each other's mouths and breathed through their noses.

Hermione felt him thrust in her hand, and with her help, his erection replaced his hand in one swift motion. She was so wet he slid right in and started moving, instantly setting a hard and fast pace.

"Oh - Yes!" she cried out and dug her nails into his shoulders. No longer able to speak, she cried out, gasping, with every thrust. Nice and slow were the furthest things from either of their minds.

"Fuck, Hermione. So fucking good," Ron grunted. His hands were on her bum, lifting her at an angle so she could feel him even deeper as he continued to move his hips in an unrelenting rhythm. Her head was buzzing and her heart was beating a mile a minute. She didn't know how Ron was able to talk and move hips at the same time. Hermione could barely remember to breathe.

His mouth was on hers again, kissing her with so much enthusiasm and passion that Hermione found herself rocking her hips against his, matching his rhythm. She braced her hands behind her on the table and leaned back slightly, bringing Ron with her as he would not let go of her lips for anything. He bent his knees and they slammed into each other, grunting and moaning.

Her orgasm hit her so suddenly that she shouted and shut her eyes tight; her entire body shuddered and jerked over and over making her arms give way underneath her. She would have smacked her head on the table if Ron hadn't caught her around the waist and pulled her up against him.

"Are you…okay?" Ron panted, slowing down.

Still feeling the aftershocks of her orgasm, Hermione peered at him through half lidded eyes and nodded while licking her lips. This was obviously enough because he picked up the pace again, holding her up with his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held on tight as he moved even faster and erratically. He then tensed his whole body, squeezing her to him as she felt him pulsing inside of her.

"Holy fuck," was all Ron said as he pulled out of her. Hermione let go of him and dropped back on the table trying to catch her breath and enjoying the swimming sensation that came after a powerful orgasm. Suddenly Ron was beside her panting, his chest heaving up and down and sweat was glistening on his face. She looked down and noticed he had put his pants back on in a hasty manner.

"Here," Ron said hoarsely and dangled her knickers in front of her face.

"Thanks," Hermione whispered and lifted her legs to put them back on. They both laughed lazily as her foot kept getting caught in the knickers as she was having a hard time of getting them on. Finally she was able to pull them up and she let out a moan, the task proving too much for her spent body.

"You asked for it," Ron said flatly then chuckled when he saw Hermione glaring at him.

"How romantic," Hermione said trying not to laugh.

"Well you did," he said smugly. "'Promise?'"

Hermione rolled her eyes at his mocking tone. "I do not sound like that."

"You did when you said it. All sexy and hot. I was hoping to get a swear word out of you this time. You were holding back, weren't you?" he eyed her suspiciously, but she was not going to take the bait.

"I was not. It was brilliant, though. You're amazing, Ron" she said and smirked at his arrogant expression. He raised one brow at her and nodded his head.

"Yeah, I was, wasn't I?"

Hermione rolled her eyes and pushed his shoulder before she sat up to leverage herself off of the table.

"Oh, you were pretty good yourself, you know," Ron said quickly and sat up.

"Yes, I know," she said with a smile. They really were quite a pair.

Hermione grabbed her wand and performed cleansing charms on them and they dressed quickly. Making sure no one was in sight, they left the shed and made their way back to their spot on the grass. Ron picked up his wand from the ground and slid his feet inside his trainers.

"Oi! There you are!" Hermione turned around to see Ginny walking toward them. She was wearing worn looking jeans and a fitted t-shirt with a snitch and the words 'Catch Me If You Can' written across it. Her bare feet sank into the tall grass as she made her way to them and stopped beside Hermione.

"Where were you?"

"Just walking around," Hermione said swiftly as she put her sandals on, not chancing a glance at Ron, knowing he would only offer her a cheeky grin.

"Right, I'm sure you were," Ginny said skeptically. Hermione blushed, grateful that she didn't ask any further questions. Ginny may be quick witted, but she always knew when to shut her mouth.

Ron ruffled Ginny's hair and said, "Where's your specky git of a boyfriend?"

" _Harry_  is in the loo," she said irritably not bothering to fix her hair. "He'll be out in a bit. I volunteered to come out first and interrupt whatever you two were up to before he comes out."

"That's so sweet of you," Ron said flatly.

"I know, right?" Ginny said and they all laughed.

"What's so funny?" Harry said from behind Ginny. He ran his hand through Ginny's hair absentmindedly before walking around her and standing next to Ron.

"I was just telling them how we have to proceed with caution when approaching them. One of these days I'm going to need therapy," Ginny said with a chuckle. Hermione's smile faltered at the word 'therapy'. She looked around for a distraction.

"What's that?" she asked, her curiosity peaked when she saw Ginny was holding a pile of envelopes in her hand.

"Oh, right," Ginny said and handed over two envelopes to Hermione, one to Ron, another one to Harry, while she kept one. She sat down on the grass and said, "We got our school letters. Harry and Ron got something from the Ministry and you got something from…St. Mungos? Why would you be getting something from there, Hermione?"

Hermione stared at Ginny for a second, not knowing what to say. Her mouth felt dry all of a sudden as she regarded the two envelopes in her hands. Each one held something that she wasn't exactly looking forward to. She wanted to go to school, but that meant leaving Ron and going back to where the war was at its worst. St. Mungos just served as a reminder of her anxiety. She already told Ron that she wasn't going to go to the appointment so she didn't have to worry about convincing him. However, she felt the now familiar pull inside her gut as she stared down at the scrawled handwriting and emblem of  _St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries._

"I…I'll open it later," Hermione said as she joined Ginny on the grass, and shoved the letter under her leg. Ron and Harry sat across from them, but Hermione avoided Ron's stare.

"Why? Are you sick, Hermione? Is this about what happened on Harry's birthday? Did something else happen?" Ginny looked wide-eyed at Hermione, then at Ron.

"It's nothing. Forget it, Ginny," Ron said through his teeth after turning to his sister and shaking his head.

"Hermione, are you alright?" Harry said, peering at her.

Hermione swallowed thickly and shook her head. "No, I mean…yes, I'm alright. And no, nothing happened. I was going to see a mind healer, but I'm better now so I decided I'm not going to go. I'll just reply back later," she said dismissively and fixed a determined look on her face.

"What do your school letters say?" Ron asked Ginny and Hermione smiled gratefully at him for the change of subject. "Is it the usual supply list and welcome letter?"

As if just remembering she also had a letter Ginny lit up and tore open her envelope. Hermione followed suit and eagerly skimmed down the list of school supplies and books they will need before 1st September. Not much else lifted her spirits every year around this time than getting a list of new books she would have to purchase and devour. Last year was the only exception as they were on the run. This year, however, her eagerness was quickly overtaken by a slightly dizzy feeling and she had to look away from the parchment.

"Here," she said, handing the list over to Ron in order to be rid of it until she could calm herself down. "Would you like to see it?"

"Sure," Ron said and gave her a curious look before he slowly took the parchment from her outstretched hand.

"Oh, wow, there's so many," Ginny muttered as she read over the list with Harry over her shoulder. "Damn those NEWTS."

"Well at least you'll be able to study for them. We have to take them without classes," Harry said.

"Well, you can always come back with us, you know," Ginny said softly, not looking up from the parchment, although Hermione could tell she was no longer reading.

"Why would we do that?" Ron scoffed and handed the list back to Hermione. She tucked the parchment back into its envelope and promised herself she would read over it again in private, along with the St. Mungos letter.

As he was opening his letter from the Ministry, Ron added, "Why would anyone go to class if they didn't have to? No offense, Hermione."

"Oh, right…" Hermione said, rolling her eyes. "…because I'm the only one who loves going to class and learning, aren't I?" she said irritably and watched as Harry and Ginny glanced at each other and Ron's grin faded.

"No, I didn't mean it like that," Ron said, taken aback. "You know how brilliant I think you are. I said no offense." His tone was hard and Hermione caught herself before she fired back with another retort.

"Well…alright. Sorry, I'm just wound up is all," she said, embarrassed to have snapped at him for a second time in one day, this time in front of Harry and Ginny.

Hermione was relieved when he just shrugged and said, "It's fine. Forget it."

"Blimey! Ron, read your letter," Harry exclaimed suddenly.

Curiosity being the perfect distraction, Hermione crawled over to sit next to Ron as he picked up his letter from the Ministry and they read it together. She skipped through the beginning formalities of them welcoming Ron to the Auror Training Program and how much they're looking forward to having him, etc. She skimmed through until she found what Harry was so excited about, in the middle of the page.

… _However, as you are aware, the Ministry took a hit due to the infiltration of deatheaters acting under You-Know-Who's time in power. Incidentally, we are extremely understaffed at the moment, particularly within the Auror Department._

_Previously we had informed yourself and Mr. Potter that you will be taking your NEWTS in December and joining us for the Auror Training Program in the spring. This will no longer be necessary. Per Minister Shacklebot's request, NEWTS will no longer be required. We have also moved your training from the spring to start as soon as possible, on 1_ _st_ _October. Training has always been a six month program, but, as we are in dire need of assistance in this field, the program will end in four months, on 1st February._

_Please report to the Auror Department, Ministry of Magic at 8:00AM sharp on 1_ _st_ _October with only your essentials. You will find a list enclosed…_

"Bloody hell," she heard Ron say from beside her when they both finished reading. He took another parchment from the envelope and read through the short list of items they were required to bring with them.

"Yeah, it looks like we're going in sooner than we thought," Harry said, grinning from ear to ear.

"And no NEWTS? This is the best news I could have asked for," Ron said happily, grinning back.

Hermione blinked, her face expressionless. The row she and Ron had back in Australia started ringing in her ears as she remembered telling him how much she disliked him becoming an Auror. She also remembered telling him that she would work on accepting it, but this letter just made it official, even more real, and much sooner than expected. She needed more time. Images of Ron throwing curses and getting them thrown back at him while on pursuit of a dangerous dark wizard and falling to the ground, bleeding…She realized she was holding her breath and let it out slowly.

"I hope they can fit proper training in that amount of time," Ginny said.

"Ginny has a point," Hermione added quickly, surprised at her even tone. "How can they fit six months of training into only four months?"

The thought of sending Ron and Harry out with incomplete training crossed her mind and her heart started to beat a little faster.

"I'm sure they know what they're doing," Harry said as he folded his letter and returned it to its envelope. "Kingsley is in charge now. He'll make sure the Ministry is put straight. It can't be worse than that farce last year."

"Isn't it funny that we're going to be working for the same place that made you the most wanted wizard just months ago?" Ron asked.

"Yes, Ron. It's fucking hilarious."

"Ginny!" They heard Mrs. Weasley call from the house.

"Damn," Ginny said hastily shoving her parchments back into the envelope and standing up. "I'm supposed to help sort through the damn laundry. I should go before she sends her bloody patronus after me."

"I'll help," Hermione said and stood up hastily. Her heart was still racing and thoughts of dangerous missions filled her mind. She saw her opportunity and needed to get away before she started another row with Ron.

"You don't have to," Ron said watching her curiously. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she said and bent down to snatch up her letters from the floor. She was so agitated that it took her two more tries before she was able to grasp them both in her hand.

"I'll meet you inside," Ginny said to Hermione and kissed Harry before jogging toward the house.

"Hermione-"

"Ron, it's fine, really. I need some water anyway. Besides I want to help your mum, alright?" She fought to steady her breathing and gave him a look to end the discussion.

Watching him was making her head spin so she looked away and said, "I'll see you later. Bye, Harry."

She heard Harry say good bye as she walked away, but didn't hear Ron say anything. She didn't turn around as she walked briskly to up to the house.

Ginny was in the living room amidst enormous piles of clothing while Mrs. Weasley was using her wand to pair socks in mid-air and drop them in a basket.

"Hermione, Ginny said you were coming to help," Mrs. Weasley said sweetly.

"Oh," Hermione said distractedly. She wanted very much to run to her bed and scream in a pillow instead. "Sure, Mrs. Weasley. I'll be right back."

Hermione ran up the stairs and locked herself in the loo. She turned on the tap and cast a silencing charm on the room. She gripped the sink and let out the loudest scream that she could possibly make. It was anti-climactic as it did nothing to sway her nerves. With her ears ringing she let the tears fall down her face and continued to look down, avoiding the mirror in front of her. Her hands were starting to hurt and she noticed that her knuckles were turning white.

Her heart was pounding in her ears as she closed her eyes and started muttering to herself, "Oh god, not this again. Stop it, Hermione. Stop."

She concentrated on Ron's face inside her head to try and calm down, but all she saw was him lying dead in an alleyway. The image changed to Harry and she opened her eyes quickly, shaking her head to remove the image. Hermione swallowed repeatedly, but her throat was closed up and the air she was trying to swallow got caught in her throat. She was coughing on the trapped air, gasping for breath. Panic. That was the only word in her brain that she could grab onto.

Her hands slipped from the sink and she dropped to the floor, her feet kicked the two letters that must have fallen from her hand. Sobbing and gasping for breath she crawled on her hands and knees and grasped the letters in her hand. All of the insecurities and fears she had about going to school, leaving Ron, seeing a mind healer, Harry and Ron willingly putting themselves in danger, welled up inside her and made her feel nauseated. The letters wrinkled in her hands as she clutched them to her chest. Bright lights started popping in front of her eyes and she squeezed them shut, desperately trying to make them disappear.

 _Stop! Breathe! Get up!_ Hermione forced the words into her head, screaming at herself to get a grip. _You're not weak! You're stronger than this. You can't let anyone find you this way. Enough!_

She let in a shuddering breath and gulped in large amounts of air. She could feel her lungs decompress and opened her eyes. The bright, popping lights were gone, but everything was blurry through her still wet eyes.

"Okay," Hermione whispered and unclenched her hands from her chest. "You're fine. Now get up and wash your face." With a few more deep and raspy breaths she stood up shakily on her feet and placed the crumpled letters on the counter. She glanced at herself in the mirror and almost started crying all over again. Her face was red and blotchy and her eyes were puffy, all framed by her frizzy hair. She looked like a mad woman.

The tap was still on so she quickly ducked her head down and splashed cold water on her face and hair. The shock of the cold water on her hot face made her more alert and she felt her heart return back to more manageable rate.

With water still dripping down her chin she stared at the sink and thought about what just happened. She couldn't believe she just had a panic attack in the loo. Angry that she let her anxiety take over after such a long time of keeping it check, Hermione turned off the water with a jerk of her wrist. Using her wand she dried her face and hair and turned to pick up her letters. Smoothing them out, she glared down at them. With a sigh, Hermione realized she knew what she had to do.

With a plan forming in her head she opened the door and walked out into the hallway – and right into Ron's chest.

He steadied her and put a finger to his lips, pointing toward the steps leading up to his room. Her heart was racing as she wondered is he heard anything. She reminded herself that she had silenced the room, but she was still shaken from the experience she just had and didn't want Ron to notice.

"I told your mum I was going to help her," she whispered and glanced at the stairs going down to the living room.

He paused then whispered, "Harry is helping them. Just tell her you don't feel well and you're…going to take a nap. She doesn't know I'm up here."

"Why not?"

"Harry distracted her. Just go," he hissed and pushed her lightly toward the stairs.

She turned around and glared at him before calling down the stairs, "Er…I'm not feeling too well so I'm going to lie down if that's alright."

"Do you want some tea, dear?" Mrs. Weasley called back and she could hear her maker her way to the stairs. Hermione rolled her eyes and turned around gesturing to Ron. He shook his head and Hermione turned back and called, "No! I'm just tired. Thanks!"

"Okay, dear. Let me know if you need something."

"I will, thank you," Hermione called back and could swear she heard Harry and Ginny sniggering in the background.

"Let's go," she mumbled as she stalked past Ron and tip toed up the stairs and walked into his room. She tossed the day-ruining letters and her wand on his desk and sat heavily on his bed. She put her head in her hands and breathed deeply.

"Did you want something, Ron?" she asked and looked up when she heard him close the door behind him.

"Yeah," he said and sat on the floor facing her. "What the bloody hell is going on with you."

"Didn't we already talk about this?" she sighed, referring to the discussion they had outside. Her attempt to distract him was thwarted when he shook his head.

"You know what I'm talking about," Ron said with hands gripping his knees. Hermione gulped as she took in his serious tone and steady eye contact. "As soon as we read my letter you couldn't wait to bolt. You're right. We did talk about this, in Australia. We agreed not to hide shit from each other. And what were you doing in the loo for so long with a silence charm on it?"

"I didn't bolt," Hermione said after swallowing thickly. "And I needed privacy. It's none of your business what I do in the loo, Ron."

"Alright, sorry. The loo is your business," he said, nodding. Hermione breathed a sigh of relief. "But, I know you're still worried about this whole Auror business. We need to talk about this. It's not going to change, remember? You made sure of that when you wouldn't let me quit."

"I know, Ron. And I am glad that you're going to finish sooner, before I get out of school, so there's that," she said attempting to find a silver lining. He smiled widely at her and Hermione smiled back, happy that she was able to move the tone of the conversation. "This also means we can move in together sooner as well," Hermione continued and slid off the bed to the floor.

"That's what I told Harry," Ron said smiling as she placed her hands on his neck.

"You told him we're going to live together?"

"Yeah, he was surprised, but seemed okay with it," he said and ran his hands up her sides. "He said he was going to stay here after training with Ginny until she was ready to move out. I'm sure they'll be over at our place most of the time anyway, overstaying their welcome and all that."

"Our place," Hermione repeated and grinned at him. "I love how that sounds."

"Definitely has a ring to it," Ron said. "Are you sure you're alright?"

Hermione huffed and rolled her eyes. "Yes, Ron. Leave it alone, please."

Before he could ask any more questions Hermione pulled him into a long, and hopefully satisfying and distracting, kiss.

"Wow," Ron said when they parted. "What was that for?"

"Just felt like it."

"Well, as much as I'd love to finish where  _that_  is leading I better go down and pretend to come back in from outside," he said pulling away from her and standing up. "I can smell mum making lunch in the kitchen so now is my chance."

Hermione glanced at the letters on his desk, remembering what she wanted to do and nodded back at Ron. "You're right. I'll come down in a bit. I'm supposed to be ill, taking a nap, right?"

"Right," Ron said chuckling. "See you." He bent down to kiss her and left the room, closing the door quietly behind him. From her spot on the floor, Hermione let out a long breath, not believing her luck that she was able to get through that conversation without a row and twenty questions.

She got up quickly and moved to Ron's desk, sitting in his chair and opening the St. Mungo's letter. There was an appointment set for her to come into the hospital on Thursday next, at noon. That was four days away. That was plenty of time for her to think of an excuse as to why she would have to leave on her own. Hermione opened a drawer and, after rooting around Ron's mess, found a blank piece of parchment and envelope. She hastily wrote her reply confirming the appointment and tucked it inside the envelope, addressed it to St. Mungos and sealed it.

She took Pig out of his cage and shushed him when he started flitting around the room, eager to finally be used after only being let out at night for short flights.

"Shh, Pig. Here, take this to St. Mungos quickly. Please hurry back," she whispered and, in an afterthought, gave him an owl treat as an incentive. "There's more of that waiting for you when you get back, okay?" She stroked the small owl lovingly and smiled when he ducked his tiny head under her chin. "Off you go."

Hermione stood at the window and nervously watched as Pig flew excitedly out of sight.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are no warnings in this one. No lemons. Not even bad language. I know, what is this T-rated chapter doing in here?
> 
> My only warning - or rather desperate plea - is…please don't hate me!
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

On Thursday morning Hermione woke up next to Ron, nervous before her eyes were even open.

"Morning," she heard Ron mutter in a hoarse and sleepy voice from over her head.

She felt his arm leave her side and reach up to gather her hair and smooth it down her back. He did this every morning as her unruly curls always found a way to cover half his face during the night.

"Sorry," she said quickly and helped him move her hair out of the way.

"Hermione," he said moving her hand away and running his fingers through her hair. "You know I don't mind. Why are you so tense today?"

Hermione bit her lip and closed her eyes. "Nothing… I just hate my hair."

She felt Ron's chest rise and fall under her head as he took a deep breath and let out a sigh. Hermione noticed he did that a lot recently. She didn't dare ask what was bothering him as she was almost sure it had to do with her obvious displays of nervousness. There was a shift in their relationship, a tension that both seemed to not want to address.

"What time are you going to your parents' house?" Ron asked as he sat up, making Hermione slide off his chest and lay on her back next to him.

She fixed her shirt that was twisted around her body and looked at her watch. "I have to leave soon. I'm eating breakfast with them this morning, you know."

"I know," Ron said. He turned around and gave her a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He looked troubled and…sad.

Hermione's swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat as he stared at her. She could tell that Ron knew there was something going on with her. He knew her better than anyone. What she didn't understand was why he wasn't trying to get it out of her. Normally, by this time, he would have locked her in the shed and asked her a million questions until she told him what was going on. Whatever his reason was she couldn't dwell on it as her mind was already consumed with what she had to do later in the day. She had no idea what to expect from a mind healer and this did not sit well with her.

_I should just tell him…but if I told him that the thought of him dying from being an Auror put me in such a state he would only threaten to quit again, and this time actually do it. I can't risk that. I'll just deal with this on my own. It's my problem and he's done enough for me already. The last thing I want to do is see a mind healer - especially alone - but I have to do it…for us._

Even as Hermione was thinking this she knew it was utter rubbish. She was lying and scheming behind his back. If he ever found out he would be beside himself with resentment and anger.

"I should get ready to go," Hermione said quickly as she stood up and grabbed her wand from Ron's desk. She was halfway across the room when Ron called her back.

"Hermione, what are you doing?"

She turned around, confused, and looked down at herself. She was fully dressed in her pajamas and it was still early enough that no one would see her leave his room.

"What do you mean?" she asked and cocked her head to the side. He was sitting in the same spot on the bed, looking at her as if she just asked him why he had two heads.

"You were going to leave…just like that?"

"Like what?" Hermione asked impatiently. She really did have to get ready as her parents were expecting her soon.

Ron sighed and shook his head. "Nevermind. I'll see you later, yeah?"

Then it clicked. She wasn't going to see him all day and here she was leaving his room without even a second glace, or a kiss…or anything.

She hurried back to the bed and sat down in front of him, feeling wretched. "Oh, Ron…I'm so sorry. I must be distracted or-,"

"Do you want to end things? Is that it? You don't...love me anymore?"

Hermione looked at Ron in shock. "I- No, of course not! Why would you even think that?"

His shoulders collapsed with relief, and then he glared at her and said, "I don't get it, Hermione. I tried not to say anything, but… you've been so…weird lately. Did I do something? Did something happen?"

_This is your chance. Just tell him and he can help you. He'll understand and be there with you and make you feel better. You don't have to do this alone. You need him._

"No, nothing happened. I'm fine," Hermione said, shaking her head. "You didn't do anything, Ron, I promise."

He peered at her for a moment then shook his head. "Right. Well that clears everything up then, doesn't it? Thank you so much, Hermione," he said loudly then ripped the covers off of him and climbed off the bed.

"What- Where are you going?" Hermione exclaimed and turned around quickly to watch as he wrenched open his dresser drawer and started pulling clothes out of it.

"I'm going to George's for a shower and breakfast. I'll be there all day so I might as well get in early," he said then hastily pulled on trousers and t-shirt.

"But…" Hermione's heart was beating so fast, threatening to pump right through her chest. She pressed her hand to her chest as she stood up opening her mouth to speak, but no words coming out.

"It's fine, Hermione. You should know that phrase by now, yeah?" Ron said sarcastically then shoved his feet in his trainers and grabbed his wand from the floor. He turned around and opened the door to leave.

"Ron, don't just leave. Let's talk, please," Hermione said and walked up close to him, pleading with him through her eyes. She saw the anger from his eyes soften to sadness. She preferred the anger.

"We will," Ron said and touched her elbow lightly with one hand, then let go and took a step back. "Tell Mr. and Mrs. Granger I said hello, alright?"

"Ron, don't-"

He interrupted her with a chaste kiss on the lips. "Love you," he said softly before he pulled away completely.

Hermione nodded, stunned into silence, and watched as he left, descending the stairs quickly. She didn't follow him.

Standing in the middle of the room, she felt tears on her face and rage start to take over her body and mind. She was so angry; not at Ron, but at herself. She let this happen, did it to herself and to their relationship. This was all her fault.

* * *

Hermione pulled the scarf tighter around her head and pushed the overlarge sunglasses in closer to her face. She looked around the room, hoping she didn't see anyone she knew. She was also making sure that no one recognized her. Ever since the end of the war she, Ron and Harry were front page news for weeks. Everyone knew who the famous trio was so Hermione made sure to use extra precaution – and a disguise – before she walked into St. Mungos. She didn't want to use glamour charms to change her hair and face so she donned a muggle disguise; a scarf and big sunglasses always seemed to work in movies and fiction novels.

The waiting room was large and bright, pale blue walls with cream colored, comfortable chairs. There were moving photographs, all of a calming nature; trees blowing in a light breeze, ocean waves crashing against a shore with a sunset dropping behind it. Hermione stared through her tinted lens at the leaves of a palm tree as it swayed back and forth across a pristine blue sky.

"Harriette Grossman?"

Hermione looked around the room and realized that the tall blonde woman who had walked in the room was talking to her. In the confirmation letter that she sent back to St. Mungos she had requested to use a different name in place of her real one. She had a feeling they would announce the next person and when she heard that ridiculous fake name yelled out loud and clear, she knew she made the right decision.

"Right here," Hermione said as she stood up and walked toward the woman.

"Hello, Harriette," the woman said in an American accent and shook Hermione's hand, unfazed by Hermione's attempt to cover her face and hair. "My name is Paula Cobb. Please come with me." She turned, indicating for Hermione to follow her.

They walked down a long, empty corridor in silence. Hermione felt herself getting more and more nervous the longer she walked until Paula stopped in front of the last door to their left and opened it.

"After you," she said with a smile. Hermione smiled weakly back at her and walked into the office.

The first thing she noticed was a large, comfortable, red sofa against the far wall with a wooden coffee table in front of it. Across from the sofa was a dark brown winged back chair. A desk stood to the side, littered with papers and folders and bookshelves were lined around the remaining walls. What caught Hermione's eyes next was that most of the shelves were not filled with books, but with various types of magical and muggle toys; bright colored puzzles, dolls, games and stuffed animals. On the sofa was a large green stuffed ogre-looking doll that Hermione guessed was supposed to be cute, but instead just looked bizarre and out of place. It looked like a playroom at the primary school she went to when she was still a muggle student…when she was a child.

_I have to be in the wrong place. This can't be right. If she makes me draw a picture about what I want to be when I grow up I will throw that green monster at her, I swear._

"Have a seat, Harriette," Paula said after she closed the door behind her.

"Oh…you can call me Hermione," Hermione said distractedly. She eyed the sofa and started to have second thoughts. She never wanted to come here to begin with. Ron had made this appointment for her. She didn't ask for this. She only confirmed it because of that blasted panic attack.

As she stood there contemplating whether or not she really needed to be there she heard Paula say, "Is there a problem, Hermione?"

Hermione sighed and said, "No. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous."

Paula smiled and nodded as she walked to the winged back chair and sat down.

Hermione inched her way to the sofa and sat down at the very end - far away from the monster toy – and took off her scarf and sunglasses. She left them on her lap and twisted her fingers around the scarf nervously. She started to feel uncomfortable under Paula's calm gaze. The woman was dressed in blue slacks and a buttoned down shirt with a large flower print. She wore sandals on her feet, one of which she had tucked under bum. She leaned her elbow on the arm of the chair and rested her chin in her hand.

"Is this your first time coming to a therapy session like this?" Hermione jumped as Paula's sharp American accent cut through the silence.

"Yes, it is," Hermione said and looked away from her to read the names off of a pile of board games on the coffee table. Operation, Scrabble, Trouble. "Are you…muggleborn?"

Paula sat up and smiled. "Yes I am, are you as well?"

Hermione peered at her, unable to believe what she just heard. Was she muggleborn? Did this woman not know who she was or was this some kind of psycho analysis reverse psychology type of thing?

"Yes," Hermione said slowly.

"That's wonderful," Paula said, beaming.

More silence.

"Um, yes. Thank you," Hermione said and took a deep breath to steady her nerves. She noticed that Paula didn't have a notebook or anything to record their session. She wasn't sure yet if this was a good or bad thing.

"Do you also see children?"

"Yes I do," Paula said and clasped her hands on her lap. "Before we get started let me tell you about myself and maybe that will help you feel more comfortable. Would that be alright?"

Hermione nodded, completely skeptical about this woman's ability to put anyone at ease.

"As I told you I am a muggle born. I was born in New York City, in the United States. My mother was a muggle and she insisted that I attend college and get what she called a 'real degree'. I have a Masters in Psychology with a minor in Social Services. After college I started working in the mind healer department of our hospital for ten years. I just moved here, as a matter of fact, so I'm still new. Do you have any questions?"

"No," Hermione said without hesitation and cleared her throat. She didn't want to know anything else about this woman. Paula seemed perfectly nice, but how was she supposed to shell out her innermost thoughts and fears to a woman who has toys in her office and didn't even know who she was?

"Fair enough," Paula said and resumed her position with her hand under her chin. Hermione's hands pulled at her scarf, making it tighter around her fingers. "Tell me why you decided to come in today."

"Someone else made this appointment for me," Hermione said.

"Alright, but why did you decide to come? What do you hope to get out of this?"

"I came," Hermione loosened the scarf around her fingers and started tying it in knots, "because I was told that I needed to come, because it would be good for me. I just want…peace."

"Do you always do what you're told?"

Hermione's hands froze over the scarf. What kind of question was that? She stared at Paula, but she just looked back at Hermione calmly as if it was just a normal conversation she was having with a friend. Her nonchalant attitude was really starting to bug Hermione.

"I…not always."

"Then why now?"

Hermione grinded her teeth. Surely this woman could see she was becoming irritated? Perhaps she didn't care or it was all part of her 'master plan' to get Hermione to open up. This just irritated Hermione more.

"It was just time."

Silence. The scarf resumed its journey around Hermione's hands, the soft silky material gliding over her skin did nothing to ebb the sweat that was collecting on her lower back.

"What did you mean by peace? Is there something going on at home? A conflict?"

"No," Hermione said quickly and reached up to wipe her wipe her brow and rub her cheek. She looked down at her hands and said, "I meant peace of mind. For myself."

"So the conflict is internal."

"Right."

"It's normal to have some inner turmoil going on. You're a young woman. I'm sure there is a lot on your mind right now. You're going through a lot of changes."

Hermione couldn't help but chuckle at that statement. A lot of changes, indeed. She was also sure that being in the middle of a war and being tortured by an evil witch was not something any normal 'young woman' goes through.

She finally looked at Paula, who was still in the same position eyeing Hermione curiously and attentively. "It's a bit more complicated than that," Hermione said. "Are you sure you never heard of me?"

Paula frowned and Hermione was relieved to see a different expression other than happy or passive cross her face. "Should I know you?"

"Do you know the name Harry Potter?"

"No, I don't. Is he another mind healer?"

Hermione looked at her incredulously. She was tempted to run out the door to the Ministry and demand veritaserum on this woman. She reckoned she must be either lying or an imposter of some kind. Hermione studied her and presumed her age to be around thirty-six given what she said about her schooling and experience in the states. Perhaps since she was foreign she didn't follow what went on with the war across the ocean.

"No, he's my best friend. He defeated Voldemort only months ago. Harry Potter," she said the name again, hoping to jog something out of Paula's memory. She couldn't believe she was even having this conversation.

"I'm sorry, but I never read anything about what went on here when I was in America," Paula said and shrugged apologetically. "Honestly, I grew up with very strict parents who didn't allow me to do much anything. I went to a muggle college and when I worked as a mind healer news from the wizarding world over here never reached my ears. Like I said I just moved here and I have a lot to catch up on. Tell me about this Potter person."

 _Oh for goodness' sake,_ Hermione thought _. I best just leave right now. There is no way I am talking to her._

"I…I wouldn't even know where to start," Hermione said, still stunned to be talking to a person who has never heard of anything that has happened to their world. It was incredible.

"Why don't you start with…why was it important that I know who you were?"

"Because…it would save me a lot of trouble explaining why I was here, for starters," Hermione said, no longer caring about politeness. Whoever scheduled this appointment must have known who she was and purposefully paired her up with someone who did not know her. "What made you come here from America?"

Paula looked taken aback for a moment. "Well…I got an invitation from St. Mungos' Head Mind Healer, who said they needed assistance with some cases and would like me to start as soon as possible. I had worked on some rather interesting cases back in America and I suppose word got around about my experience."

"But…why would they put me and you together?" Hermione asked.

She must have had a bewildered look on her face because Paula replied, "Why do you think they did?"

"I don't know."

More silence.

Hermione racked her brain, extremely annoyed at this turn of conversation. Not that they were having much of a conversation anyway. There had to be a reason she was sitting with someone who didn't know about her. If she were honest with herself it was somewhat of a relief not have Paula gawk at her and treat her like a celebrity.

"Perhaps," Hermione said and noticed Paula sit up in her chair, "they did it  _because_  you never heard of me. You see, I…I helped Harry defeat Voldemort. Its…kind of a big deal." She shrugged and felt her face turn red.

She hated saying it, but it was the truth. She  _did_  help and it  _was_  something to be proud of.

"We – Harry, Ron and I – we've been through a lot of… dangerous things together in the past seven years," she continued and found herself not being able to stop. "A lot of death and…torture. We saw gruesome things as kids and even more as we got older. We put ourselves in precarious situations to help Harry and didn't even think twice. Well, I did, but my support never wavered, you see." She took a deep breath and glanced at Paula. She sat silently listening to Hermione with a nondescript expression. "It's a long, confusing, and complicated story as to how it all happened."Hermione paused then sighed, feeling frustrated. "That's all I have right now."

She wasn't willing to talk any further until she heard some feedback. She didn't want to sit through another endless bout of silence.

"I have to say I am fascinated," Paula said after a moment and shook her head. "It sounds as if you and your friends have gone through a lot together. Are you still friends?"

"Yes, of course," Hermione said somewhat offended.

"I didn't mean anything by it. I was just asking," Paula said kindly. "It is important to have people who are close to you and have been through these things with you nearby. Do they support you coming here?"

Hermione hesitated and said quietly, "Yes."

"That's wonderful." Paula smiled and untucked her foot from under her. She switched to the other side and said, "So can you tell me now, what made you feel that you needed to come in today? And are Harry and Ron in therapy as well?"

"No, it's just me. I seem to be the only one who can't handle the…stress, I suppose you can call it," Hermione said pathetically and started taking the knots out of her scarf. "I've been having issues with processing some of the thoughts and memories that come into my head. I react…abnormally."

"Abnormally, in what way?"

"It depends on the thought or… memory, I suppose," Hermione said and rubbed her temple. She felt a headache start to bloom on the side of her head. She looked at the clock on the wall and noticed it was near the end of the session.

"Would you like to continue this another time?"

Hermione straightened up slowly in her seat, relieved. "Yes, please. I'm sorry, my head is aching right now and I can't think."

Paula smiled and Hermione smiled back because she could tell it wasn't out of pity or judgment. She truly seemed to care. Hermione was surprised and disappointed to have only come to this conclusion at the last minute.

"I can see you again in another week. Would that work for you? Same time?"

That was just a few days before she would be returning to Hogwarts. She considered this and thought if she wanted to get better this might be her only chance. One more session might not hurt.

"Yes, that works," she said, nodding her head.

"I can put you down for a double session if that's also alright. If you don't mind I'm going to read up on this whole Voldemort and Harry Potter situation so we can have a better talk the next time we meet."

"I…suppose that's only logical. Double session is also fine," Hermione said rapidly, feeling the urge to stand up and leave. She was starting to feel overwhelmed and shifted in her seat, her back sticking to shirt from the sweat that clung to it.

"Wonderful," Paula said and stood up quite suddenly. She stuck out her hand, which Hermione shook as she stood on shaky legs. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Hermione. I understand the need for the scarf and glasses now," she said with a wink and moved toward the door.

Hermione laughed nervously and smoothed down her clothes that had gotten wrinkled from sitting for too long.

"Thank you," Hermione said then replaced the abused scarf around her head and the oversized black sunglasses over her eyes.

"I'll see you next week," Paula said with another smile.

"Alright, bye then," Hermione said lamely before Paula closed the door.

She stood in the middle of the corridor, not moving. Just like that, it was over, so abruptly. When she was inside it felt like time could go on forever, the silences stretching for what felt like years. Now that she was on the other side it felt like it was over so quickly.

_Did that really just happen? And I'm coming back? ...I must be nutters._

She shook her head and willed her feet to move back the way she came, out into the bright waiting room and into the main hospital corridor. From there she gathered her thoughts and took a deep calming breath before she disapparated.

Apparating around the corner from her parents' house, she paused to rid herself of her ridiculous disguise, shoving them into her bag and shook out her hair. She blew a long breath out of her mouth and set out toward the house. She didn't want to seem frazzled when she arrived.

As she walked down the street she pushed the bizarre therapy session from her mind and focused on what she was going to say to Ron. He would be coming home that night expecting a lot more answers than 'I'm fine'. He made that perfectly clear. As she considered different things to say that might not make him hate her forever she noticed she was coming upon her house quite suddenly, as she wasn't paying attention to her surroundings. She would have walked right by it if it wasn't for her dad calling out to her from the garage.

"Hermione! Sorry I missed you earlier, come over here and give us a hand."

Hermione smiled, knowing what her dad wanted a 'hand' with. About 6 years ago he had bought a really old looking, vintage car He said it was a Morris Minor from the 1930s that someone had dug out of an abandoned barn yard. It looked more like a rusted tin can if Hermione ever saw one.

"Dad, that old car isn't ever going anywhere," Hermione said lightly as she ambled up the driveway. "You do know that…right…" She trailed off and stood in front of the garage, frozen.

Her dad was wiping down the dented hood of the old car, grinning proudly. The car itself looked the same as the last time Hermione saw it: old and ugly. What made her speechless was that her dad had company. He was showing the car to someone who was leaning their back against the front of the car.

"Look who came to visit," her dad said as he opened the car door and dug inside for something. Hermione glanced at her dad who didn't notice Hermione's shocked expression. She looked back at the visitor who had their arms crossed tight against their chest.

He was eyeing her through narrowed, suspicious eyes and said, "So, how did it go with the Mind Healer…Hermione?"

Hermione just stared, her heart beating rapidly and her throat running dry, as Ron pushed himself off of the car and slowly walked his lanky build up to her until her nose was touching the top button of his shirt. She swallowed.

Ron muttered in a low voice, "We need to talk."


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I know you're expecting the inevitable confrontation, and it is coming, but first let's see how Ron's day went after he left the Burrow that morning…
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

"Do you have these in fuschia?"

Ron blinked, startled to see a blonde, pigtailed girl who looked no older than a fifth year, in front of him.

"Huh?"

The girl rolled her eyes and smacked her teeth impatiently. "Fuschia?" she said and help up a purple pygmy puff.

Ron frowned, not exactly in the mood for a snooty little girl to ask him ridiculous questions. "What the bloody hell is a fuschia?"

"You can't be serious. It's a color! Honestly," the girl said haughtily and turned to her brunette friend, shaking her head, pigtails bouncing annoyingly around her shoulders.

"Oi! How am I supposed to know that?" Ron said and slapped his hand on the register counter of the joke shop.

If it was any other day Ron probably would have shrugged it off and made a joke to win the customer over, resulting in a sale. However, he was in a foul mood. It was near lunch time and Ron about had it with all the snot nosed kids coming in to fill up their supply of trick wands and puking pastilles before they went back to school in about a week.

"You do work here, don't you?" the blonde girl retorted with a smirk. "You should know things like that."

Ron balled his hands into fists and talked through his teeth, forcing himself to stay calm. "If you don't see it, we don't have it, yeah?"

"I was only asking, you don't have to be a dick about it," she said with a glare, punctuated with a hand on her hip.

_That's it. This girl is going to get a face full of that bat bogey hex Ginny finally taught me. I've been dying to use it anyway._

Before Ron could draw his wand he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around to see George eyeing him, clearly not amused.

"What's the problem, ladies?" George said smoothly then not so gently pushed Ron behind him.

"This arse was giving me attitude because he didn't know what a bloody color was!"

"Do you kiss your mum with that mouth?" Ron said loudly from behind George's shoulder. "How old are you anyway? 12?"

The blonde and brunette turned to each other and laughed; their high pitched giggles made Ron want to rip out his hair. The surrounding customers were starting to glance their way, some of them staring openly at the scene enfolding in front of their eyes.

"Ron," George muttered, "isn't it about time you took your lunch break? I got this."

"Yeah, go to lunch,  _Ron-"_

"Wait," the brunette girl said, interrupting her friend with one hand up in the air. "Ron? As in Ronald Weasley? You're, like… famous, right?"

"Bloody hell," Ron groaned and slapped a hand to his forehead. "Do you even know the name of the bloody building you're in, you daft b-"

"Whoa," George said loudly as he covered Ron's mouth with his hand. "I'll be right back," George said to the girls then shoved Ron toward the back storage room.

"I'm sorry," Ron said as soon as they were out of earshot. "That was stupid. I'm just not with it today."

He turned to look guiltily at George who looked tired, but mostly annoyed.

"Just…stay here and do inventory or something. I'll come back when I close for lunch," George said and slammed the door on his way out.

Ron rubbed his face with his hands and growled in frustration. He kicked over a box, spilling packages of chocolate frogs onto the floor. He snatched one up and sank down to the floor, leaning against a shelf filled with inventory that he should have been counting.

"Well, this is just perfect," he muttered. "Stuck back here like some kind of…house elf."

Ron grabbed a chocolate frog from the floor and, without a second thought, tore it open, caught the leaping frog in one hand and bit off its head with more force than was necessary. He let it melt in his mouth, the sweet chocolate doing nothing to ebb his aggravation. Now that he was alone, without distraction from whiny kids and their parents, he had time to reflect on his bad mood and the cause of it: Hermione.

Ron was still irritable from their uncomfortable and frustrating morning. He felt sick about walking out on her, but reminded himself that this was different than when they were in the tent. Hermione was the one acting strangely and being distant with him. There was a change in their relationship, a strain that wasn't there before, and he knew it wasn't coming from him. He couldn't help but jump to the conclusion that she was close to ditching him. He didn't want to believe it, but after their awkward conversation, and her rush to leave his room that morning, he didn't know what else to believe. All of Ron's old insecurities were starting to come back and, no matter how hard he tried to avoid or fight them, they insisted on crawling into his head and contaminating his every thought.

Since Ron has been with Hermione he felt more alive and happier than he thought was possible given the circumstances. He was more confident in himself; being the only one capable of giving her comfort and pleasure. He gave her his whole heart without hesitation, and more love than he knew he possessed. The thought of her no longer wanting him made him feel nauseated, but even more than that, he was pissed off.

_I'm worried about Auror training, George's depression, this shop, Harry and Ginny doing Merlin knows what and where, Mum crying every other night, Hermione leaving soon and possibly chucking me, and now I got some mouthy little girl making me lose my shit. Fucking hell._

Ron stood up suddenly and started pacing, his mind buzzing, emotions flipping between intense worry and extreme anger as he wrung his hands together.

The door opened and George walked in making Ron pause mid-step. He then followed George's gaze to the floor. Chocolate frogs were still strewn in every direction.

"Sorry," Ron said breathlessly and took his wand out to replace the uneaten packages of chocolate frogs back into the box.

"Well, are you going to tell me why I had to stop you from hexing a little girl today?" George asked and leaned his shoulder against the storage room door. "And why you've been moody all fucking morning?"

"That  _little_  girl was a bitch," Ron said then resumed pacing, the urge to move taking over. "I wasn't really going to hex her."

"Yeah, well, it sure looked that way," George said crossly. "You show up here ass crack early in the morning then proceed to piss me off all day. I love you, Ron, but I might have to kick your arse before the day is over."

Ron stopped pacing once again and turned to look at George, noticing the strained look on his face. The last thing Ron wanted to do was make things harder for him. Rowing with a customer, no matter how much of a pain in the arse they were, did not fall into the category of 'helping George'. Ron was the one who offered his time (for a price) in order to keep him from running off to the Hog's Head every other night. So far he thought he was doing a damn good job of it; getting praise from his parents and Bill, and especially Hermione was an added bonus. His thoughts returned to Hermione and the past few days and he felt his temper rising once again.

"Fuck," Ron muttered. He pushed his hair back away from his face and blew out a deep breath. "You're right. I'm sorry. It's just been a bad day, that's all."

"Yeah, I know those," George said quietly and stared down at the floor.

Ron felt like someone punched him in the stomach. Here he was lamenting about girl problems and George had to live every day with the loss of his twin. Ron missed Fred even more in those moments, when he was reminded just how tragic their loss was. Being around George was always a constant reminder of Fred's death. He wasn't sure he would ever get over expecting Fred to come walking in after George, finishing his sentences, only to find nothing there.

Ron joined George at the door and slumped against it. "I know. I miss him, too. Sorry."

"Stop saying that. I fucking hate that word," George said lowly. "Thanks."

"Yeah, alright," Ron said and sighed heavily. "It's Hermione, actually. We had a row this morning." He didn't want to talk about what happened, but he needed to change the subject before the ache in his chest threatened to spill out through his eyes.

George cleared his throat and turned to Ron with his eyebrows raised. "That early in the morning? Interesting."

"Shut it," Ron said, his ears turning red. "And don't tell mum."

"So what happened?"

"I think she might want to chuck me." Ron's heart clenched as he voiced his fear out loud.

"No way. Never," George said quickly, shaking his head vigorously.

"How do you know?"

George scoffed and said, "Because I have bloody eyes? That girl, for whatever reason, loves your lanky arse. She's mental, that one."

"That's not funny," Ron muttered. Considering her anxiety and past panic attacks – not to mention her most recent bizarre behavior – Ron was a lot more sensitive to words like barmy, crazy and mental when it came to Hermione.

Ron glared at the floor, feeling a sudden urge to find Hermione and talk to her. In his gut he knew Hermione loved him, which made his fear of her leaving him so incredibly confusing. He didn't go through seven years of fighting, nearly dying in the process more than a few times, and living through it to let her go so soon after finally getting her. He had to find her and fight for their love, even if she wouldn't.

"Okay," George said slowly. "Look, did you want to leave? You don't look so good right now."

"I…I think I need to find her. Hermione, I mean. I just don't want to leave you in a lurch," Ron said. He felt like a git for wanting to leave, but if he stayed there any longer he might end up getting himself fired by his own brother.

George waved him off and said, "Lee's here. And Angelina has been hinting at wanting a job so I'm sure she won't mind coming in."

Ron bounced on his feet and pushed away from the door. "Thanks, George. I'll make it up to you."

George moved out of his way and as Ron was leaving he heard him call out, "You bet your arse you will!"

Ron didn't apparate inside the shop because he was too keyed up and didn't want not to splinch himself. He walked down Diagon Alley until he felt he was ready and apparated to the Burrow.

X

As the Burrow came into view Ron saw Harry and Ginny sitting in the grass on top of a large red blanket, looking down at a small, wrapped bundle and smiling widely.

"Ron, hi!" Ginny said, waving from her seat on the ground. She was wearing cut-offs and a bright yellow shirt with black lightning bolts all over it.

"Nice shirt," Ron said as he approached them.

"Thanks," Ginny said as she looked down at her shirt and chuckled. "Charlie sent it to me as a joke, but I love it."

"I don't," Harry said smirking.

"Oh, you do," Ginny said, pointing at Harry. "At least it doesn't have  _The Chosen One_  written across it like he wanted it to."

Harry groaned and Ginny laughed loudly, making the bundle between them squirm and let out a squeak.

They all looked down at it and Ron noticed a tuft of bright green hair poking out and remembered that Teddy Lupin was visiting that day. He smiled and crouched down to look at the baby. He had Remus' eyes and obviously Tonk's Metamorphmagus trait.

"He's so small," Ron said, transfixed, and lightly touched the baby's tiny fingers. He was amazed at how soft and tiny he was.

"He  _is_  a baby, Ron," Ginny said and rolled her eyes.

"Oi, don't be a brat," Ron said and messed her hair. She glared at him then went back to making funny faces down at Teddy.

"It's good to see you, Ron," Harry said, "but, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with George?"

"I took off early," Ron said as he stood up, remembering the reason he was there. He looked up at the house and said, "Is Hermione inside?"

"No," Harry said as he tickled Teddy's nose with a strand of Ginny's hair. "She's been gone since this morning."

Ron frowned, lost in thought. He wondered why Hermione would still be at her parents' house. She told him the day before that she was only going for breakfast because she wanted to come back to the Burrow to see Teddy.

"Harry, I don't think he likes that," Ginny said smacking his hand away from her hair. They laughed and Harry picked up the baby to sit him in his lap.

"Watch his head, for Merlin's sake," Ginny said, leaning forward to brace Teddy's neck with her hand and carefully place him in the crook of Harry's arm. Harry smiled as she lightly pressed her lips to his small nose. It was such a tender moment between his sister and best mate that Ron couldn't help but imagine them married with their own baby. That thought only made him think about what he wanted with Hermione and what he had to do to make it happen.

Ron felt himself start to grow more worried as he stood there. Maybe something happened to her at her parents' house. He remembered the red ball that exploded the Grangers' kitchen, which was now in the Ministry's possession. They haven't gotten an answer back yet as to what it actually was and that worried him even more.

"I gotta go," Ron said; his urgent voice cutting into the peaceful atmosphere.

"What's wrong?" Harry said quickly. "Is Hermione in trouble? Do you need me to go with you?" He was about to hand Teddy over to Ginny, but Ron shook his head making Harry sit back down.

"She must still be with her mum and dad," Ron said in a more casual tone. Besides, he might just be overreacting and didn't want to worry Harry when he looked so happy with Ginny and Teddy. "I'll just go over now and surprise her."

"Alright, if you're sure," Harry said. He didn't look convinced, but shrugged when Ron nodded and smiled.

"Oh," Ginny called out as Ron turned to leave. "Tell Hermione not to forget that muggle foot massager thing. She said she would bring it next time she was there."

Ron paused, having no idea what she was on about. "Okay…whatever. See you later!"

He turned and jogged until he was able to disapparate.

X

"Bloody hell! Ron?"

Ron had apparated into the Grangers' back garden right in front of Hugo, who was mowing the grass.

"I could have mowed you over!" Hugo exclaimed with his hand over his heart.

"Oh, my god. I'm so sorry," Ron said, his heart racing as he eyed the suspicious looking machine. He was only thinking of their house and didn't bother to consider how they might react to an unexpected visitor literally popping in. He realized too late that he should have used the alleyway around the corner like Hermione told him to. He breathed a sigh of relief when he realized the house was still intact. Then his face turned red from embarrassment as he noticed Hugo watching him curiously.

"Aren't you supposed to be working?" Hugo asked sharply after he turned off the machine.

Ron looked around the garden, expecting to see Hermione come out from behind a bush or a tree trunk. "I got off of work early and wanted to see Hermione. Sorry I scared you," he said sheepishly.

"That's alright. You looked more scared that I was," Hugo said with a chuckle. "Besides, I just got home and could use the excuse not to finish."

"Oh, okay," Ron said and peered at the house behind him. "Is Hermione in the loo or…"

"Oh, Hermione's not back yet."

Ron stared at Hugo, not understanding what he just heard. "I'm sorry. 'Yet'?"

As Hugo turned to push the mower to the side of the garden he said, "Well, I just missed her myself, but Luann said she left about thirty minutes ago. I expect her back from her appointment in another hour, maybe sooner."

Ron stared blankly at him. "Er…Appointment?"

"Yes, with the Mind Healer," Hugo said as he walked towards Ron, dusting his hands off on his trousers. "Did you want to go with her? I reckon you're a bit late."

Ron turned the information around in his head, trying to figure out the right response. Obviously Hermione told them she was going to a mind healer appointment, but Ron knew she had turned that down. He had no idea it was even scheduled for that day. Although, he couldn't imagine her lying to her parents, more than anyone. Her dad had to be telling the truth. Ron was so confused that he decided to go along with the story to get more information.

"Right…" Ron said and crossed his arms. "What time was it for again?"

"She said it was for noon," Hugo said and paused, looking at Ron warily. "Is something wrong?"

Ron forced a smile and said, "No, not at all. I must have gotten the time mixed up. I'll just wait for her here, if that's alright?"

Hugo beamed and clapped Ron hard on the shoulder. "Brilliant! Have you eaten lunch? Luann left some meat pies I can warm up for us."

"Er…no I haven't," Ron replied honestly, not counting the chocolate frogs he devoured in the storage room of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes.

"Come with me, then. After we eat I want to show you something."

He walked ahead into the house and Ron followed. His mind was a whirlwind of emotions: Confusion, fear, anger, shock. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and glared at the ground as he walked.

_What the hell? She told me she was going to turn that appointment down. She didn't even want to go and now I find out she went anyway? Behind my back! If she won't tell me this, then what else is she hiding? Maybe she really does want to chuck me. Shit! No. I'm not going to let her get away with this. I deserve to know what's going on, dammit._

"Luann just left. She'll be sorry she missed you," Ron heard Hugo say as they stepped into the kitchen. He then laughed and said, "We're all just missing each other today, aren't we?"

"Oh, yeah," Ron said distractedly. "Tell her I said hi if I leave before she gets home." He couldn't believe he could even carry on normal conversation given the one that was going on inside his head.

He watched as Hugo washed his hands in the kitchen sink and dried them before taking a container out of the refrigerator and putting it in the microwave. "Luann hates when I use the microwave," Hugo said as he pushed buttons and the microwave whirred to life. "Says it leaves food hot on the outside and cold on the inside. I told her as long as you leave it in there long enough the whole thing will heat up eventually."

Ron sat at on the stool at the island and smirked at Hugo's logic. Even though he didn't quite understand how a microwave worked he reckoned that sounded like something he, himself, would say. Listening to Hugo was like throwing sand on a fire. He felt his mounting rage somewhat ebb as he sat there with the older man.

"So," Hugo said as he leaned against the counter in front of the microwave, blocking Ron's view of the lit up window and the spinning food. "Hermione says you're working really hard at your brother's shop."

"Er…yeah, I reckon I am. I'm just trying to help out, you know."

"He is paying you, correct?"

The tone of Hugo's voice made Ron suddenly feel like he was under a hot lamp as sweat formed at the back of his neck.

"Yes, he is. I insisted on it, actually. I need the money, you see," he said and leaned his elbows on the table. He remembered his mum once told him that was bad manners and dropped his arms to his lap nervously. He couldn't understand; one minute he was smirking at one of Hugo's jokes and now he was under interrogation; or at least it felt that way with Hugo's eyes burrowing a hole in his skull.

"That's right," Hugo said and cocked his head to the side. "You're saving up for a flat right?"

Ron opened his eyes wide and gulped. "Er…um…"

"Hermione told us you were planning on moving out of your house next summer," Hugo said, his eyes not seeming to blink.

"Yeah," Ron said and cleared his throat. He noticed he didn't mention him and Hermione moving together so he wasn't sure what else Hermione might have told them. "I mean, I'm of age so…"

The microwave beeped making Hugo turn around to open it. Ron's shoulders sagged, relieved to be literally saved by the bell. He watched Hugo take out two dishes and heap half of the meat pie onto each plate.

He pushed Ron's toward him and poured some water into two glasses.

"Thank you," Ron said. His stomach growled as he looked at the delicious food, not realizing how hungry he was. He must be upset to not notice that his appetite had gone.

Hugo sat next to him and took a bite. "Delicious, yeah?"

Ron took a bite and nodded, humming his agreement.

"Hermione also told us she's moving in with you," Hugo said and took another bite.

Ron nearly choked as he swallowed a piece of meat whole. He coughed and drank a gulp of water before he looked over at Hugo expecting a very severe look. Instead Hugo was looking straight ahead, casually eating his meat pie as if he were discussing the weather.

"She told you that? Really? When?"

"Just yesterday," Hugo said.

"Oh, right. Well, I mean-"

"You do love her, am I right?"

Ron stared at Hermione's father who was fixing him with an authoritative look.

"Of course I do. Very much," Ron said without hesitation. No matter how confused he was about the status of their relationship he knew that fact would never change.

"She loves you an awful lot," Hugo said and pointed his fork at Ron. "I hope you know that."

"I…I do," Ron stammered, his voice not as confident as it once was.

_But if she just told them just yesterday about us moving together then there is no way she's thinking about ending things between us…right? I'm so bloody confused!_

"I'm only going to ask this once so just answer yes or no and we no longer have to discuss it, alright?" Hugo said. Ron nodded cautiously. "You are using protection, is that right? "

Ron's mouth went dry. He wasn't stupid; he knew what Hugo was asking. He just couldn't believe he was having a conversation about his sex life with his girlfriend's father.

"Yea, every time," he choked out and averted his eyes away from Hugo, back to his plate. His appetite had left him altogether.

"That's good…good," Hugo said quietly and started eating again. Ron glanced at him, perplexed at how he can go from jolly one second, to stern the next, then back to normal. He had to assume it was a tactic that fathers of daughters often exercise to keep their boyfriends on their toes. Ron had to admit it was working. He made a mental note to ask his dad if he ever gave Harry this type of interrogation. Somehow he strongly doubted it.

"Mr. Granger, how did you know that we-"

"You just told me," Hugo said and looked at Ron over his glasses.

_Well, shit… I walked right into that one. At least I still have all my limbs so I guess I didn't muck up too bad._

"Right," Ron said, his ears growing hot. He felt like he had to say something to prove his worth to her father; that he wasn't only with Hermione for sex and when he said he loved her that it wasn't in vain. "I'm going to take care of her, you know. Whatever she needs, I'll be there. I'll always fight for her, no matter what."

Ron looked steadily into Hugo's eyes, resisting the urge to duck his head. He had to show some maturity to the older man; show him he was a man as well, who was capable of taking care of his only daughter.

"Do you plan on marrying Hermione some day?"

Ron gulped, but didn't avert his eyes one inch. "Yes, sir. If she'll have me of course." He wanted to convince her father of his intentions, but he felt strange doing so when he wasn't sure what Hermione's intentions were after all the mixed signals she was sending him recently.

"Alright, then," Hugo said and clapped his hands one time, making Ron jump. He stood up and cleared the island of their dishes. "Now that that's out of the way, follow me. You're going to love this."

He turned and led the way to a door that Ron knew led to the garage. When he was there with Hermione, searching the house, he only glanced inside and there was a canvas tarp covering something large. Ron assumed it was some sort of muggle machine and didn't bother looking underneath.

Still stunned by their bizarre conversation, Ron followed Hugo into the dim garage and watched as he lifted up the tarp to reveal a beat up, rusted, extremely old looking…thing.

"What is it?" Ron said after a few seconds of silence. He looked around for a clock, cursing himself for not wearing a watch. He figured it should be about time for Hermione to be finished with that appointment and expected her to show up any second. He was starting to get worked up, his previous temper starting to rise as he remembered her lies and sketchy behavior.

Hugo, seemingly oblivious to Ron's change of disposition, rolled up the garage door leading to the driveway to let in more light. He turned around, arms wide, and said, "This is a Morris Minor…it's a car."

"Oh, right. Well…It doesn't look like other cars I've seen," Ron said.

"That's because it's a classic," Hugo said with a gleeful smile.

Ron smiled back and nodded. He wanted to leave, go back home and punch a wall. But he stayed because he was determined to confront Hermione. He didn't know what he was going to say or what would come out of it, but he wasn't going to walk away without answers. He forced himself to calm down, flexing his fingers and rubbing his neck. He didn't want to let her dad know that there was anything wrong.

"So, where did you get it?" Ron asked and walked up to the pile of metal and peered into what he guessed was supposed to be the trunk.

"Years ago someone found a bunch of old cars in an abandoned barnyard. I got this at auction. Isn't it lovely?"

Ron looked at Hugo and had to smile at the older man's expression of adoration toward the old car.

"Er…yeah," Ron said then chuckled. "…Actually, no, it isn't."

"Oh, you sound like Hermione," Hugo said with a laugh.

Ron's face fell at the mention of her. "What time is it?"

"Don't worry she'll be here soon," Hugo said then walked to a shelf and rummaged through a box, pulling out a photo.

"This is what it's supposed to look like," he said, handing the photo to Ron. "I'm going to fix it until it looks just like that."

Ron looked at the photo and couldn't help but grin. He was always fascinated with muggle things, but ever since he flew his dad's Ford Anglia second year he especially wanted to learn more about cars.

"Wicked," Ron said.

"Too right," Hugo said and took the photo back, replacing it back inside the box. "How would you like to help me restore it? I could use the extra hands. And who knows? If we get it up and running you could even drive it!"

Ron felt himself getting excited. Not only would he learn more about cars, and possibly drive one, but it would also give him a chance to get to know Hugo better. Despite their tense conversation in the kitchen, Ron really did like spending time with Hugo and felt that Hugo really liked him as well.

"That sounds cool, yeah. I work for my brother and I'll be leaving for training soon, but…I can come over on the weekends before then."

"Sorted," Hugo said happily and squeezed Ron's shoulder. Ron's grin slipped as he thought:  _if Hermione and I are still together anyway._

He took a deep breath and forced himself to smile. Ron found himself getting caught up in Hugo's enthusiasm as he showed him various features of the car that Ron didn't notice on first impression. He was busy looking through one of Hugo's car manuals when he was startled by Hugo calling out.

"Hermione! Sorry I missed you earlier, come over here and give us a hand."

Ron stood up straight, his eyes wide.

"Dad, that old car isn't ever going anywhere," Ron heard Hermione say, her soft voice drifting up the driveway.

All the emotions he had pushed back for the past hour suddenly came rushing back to him. He moved to the front of the car and adopted a casual pose even though his heart felt like it was going jump out of his throat. Then he saw her; a mane of dark curls bouncing behind her as she walked with the sun on her perfectly smooth face. Ron felt himself soften as he looked her. Hermione had a smile on her face, but shock and guilt replaced it when she spotted Ron.

Ron narrowed his eyes as they stared at each other. He felt too much satisfaction at her stunned face, knowing she didn't expect to see him there of all places, and of all the times to visit.

Ron heard Hugo open the car door, making a loud screeching noise, but he didn't falter in his gaze.

"Look who came to visit," Hugo said, his voice muffled from inside the car.

Hermione's eyes shifted away from Ron to her dad then back again.

"So, how did it go with the Mind Healer…Hermione?" Ron said in a cool, even tone.

When she didn't answer Ron walked toward her slowly, not surprised and not exactly caring that she was visibly shaken. Suddenly he was so close he could smell her hair. Instead of feeling the usual warming in his heart from her scent, it pissed him off even more.

"We need to talk," Ron muttered quietly so that only she could hear.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
> 
> I listened to the following song on repeat while writing. You will understand why after reading.
> 
> Though I don't understand the meaning of love  
> I do not mind if I die trying  
> Took it for granted when you lifted me up
> 
> I'm asking for your help  
> I am going through hell  
> Afraid nothing can save me but the sound of your voice  
> You cut out all the noise  
> And now that I can see mistakes so clearly now  
> I'd kill if I could take you back
> 
> Why must we be so ugly  
> And please do not think ill of me  
> Why does the one you love  
> Become the one who makes you want to cry
> 
> How - Maroon 5

Hermione took a step back and looked up at Ron. She was reminded of an eclipse as her eyes blinked rapidly against the bright sunlight that was making his hair look ablaze, but his face cast in shadow. He came across as intimidating with his lips set in a straight line and his brow furrowed against his lashes.

"I – " Hermione cleared her throat as her voice came out an octave higher than normal. "I…don't know what to say," she whispered and crossed her arms protectively across her chest.

Ron leaned over until his lips grazed her right ear. Hermione shivered when his breath first hit her skin and his scent hit her nose; then she froze as his words came out cold and daunting.

"I don't want to worry your dad, so smile and tell him we have to go. Now."

She quickly looked over his shoulder at her dad who was watching them with concerned interest. Ron was right; she didn't want to drag her dad into their situation.

She smiled brightly as Ron stood up straight again and said through her teeth, "You want to talk, you tell him."

With the advantage of his back to Hugo, Ron glared down at her and cocked his head. "Alright, I will," he huffed and fixed a smile on his face before he turned around and walked back up the driveway.

Hermione followed and hugged her dad when they reached him.

"Hermione, are you alright? You looked upset just now," Hugo said, peering into her face.

"No, I'm fine," she said and ignored Ron when he made an obviously irritated sound with his throat.

Hugo went on to say, "So, how was it, seeing the Healer?"

Hermione glanced over at Ron, nervous to say anything about the appointment just yet. "Oh, it was… fine." She cringed at the word 'fine' as she knew it was quickly becoming her equivalent to crying wolf.

"Fine?" Hugo said skeptically and exchanged a look with Ron.

Hermione couldn't help the indignation that rose within her as she looked between Ron and her dad. Ron merely cleared his throat and shoved his hands in his pockets, while Hugo looked uneasy.

"You always say you're fine, Pumpkin," Hugo said soothingly when he noticed her frown. "I'm just concerned that's all. Why don't you both come in for tea?"

"Actually," Ron interrupted when Hermione was about to speak, "I was hoping to take Hermione somewhere since I got some time off today. I hope that's alright."

Hugo looked disappointed at first then smiled and said, "Alright, but make sure to visit more often, Ron. We miss you around here."

"Sure, Mr. Granger," Ron said with a smile. Hermione was surprised at how calm Ron sounded as he engaged in conversation with her dad, although she can see the bitterness behind his eyes and the stiffness in his neck. "I'll come by day after next and we can work on the car if you like."

"Brilliant!" Hugo said with a clap and a smile. "Now go have some fun and we'll see you soon."

Hermione didn't know what they were on about with the car, but she hugged her dad with a heavy heart as she knew the word 'fun' was not in hers and Ron's immediate future. Being there with her dad, who always radiated happiness and peace, was a great comfort for Hermione. She was not looking forward to what Ron obviously wanted to tell her.

"See you later," Ron said as he shook hands with Hugo. "Ready?" he said to Hermione and extended his hand out for her to grasp.

She hesitated for a moment then sighed before she placed her hand in his. Next thing she knew she was being pulling further into the garage, away from the driveway and anyone who might see them suddenly disappear. She waved to her dad just before she was yanked into a side-along disaparration.

X

Hermione landed on her feet with a thud, twigs and leaves snapping under the sudden weight. She immediately withdrew her hand from Ron's and glanced at him, noticing the hurt expression that flashed across his face before he cast a muffliato charm around them.

She looked around, taking in her surroundings. They were in the woods, inside a cluster of trees that looked familiar to Hermione. She walked to the edge of the tree line to peer through the leaves and saw a dirt path.

"You took us  _here_?" Hermione yelled and swiveled around to glare at Ron. He was leaning against a tree – their tree – the one she remembered getting her hair caught on as Ron buried his fingers in her; where she begged him to take her fast and hard. She looked to her left at the very spot where he entered her from behind and had her swearing and cumming so hard she could barely breathe. The memory of how deep he went inside her that time was forever burned into her brain. There was no way she going to have it out with him in this spot.

"No," she said firmly and stomped her foot. Ron rolled his eyes, which made Hermione angrier. "Take me somewhere else. I'll take  _you_  somewhere else. Not here!"

"It was the first place I could think of with any privacy," Ron said with a shrug.

"No, I can't do this here. I can't," Hermione said shaking her head vigorously.

"Can't do what, Hermione?" Ron said, his voice rising with every word. Hermione jumped as he stepped away from the tree and stopped a few feet away from her. "Can't let me down nicely in the same place where I  _fucked_  you?"

Hermione recoiled at the nastiness that dripped from the swear word; the tone of his voice making her feel suddenly cold as she wrapped her arms across her middle.

"What are you talking-"

"You lied to me! You went behind my back. You -" He looked like he wanted to say more, but his voice got caught in his throat. He rubbed his hands roughly over his face and let out a frustrated growl.

Hermione watched as he started pacing and heaved her own sigh of frustration. "Look," she said. "I know you're upset and I don't blame you-"

"Oh, well, thanks," Ron said sarcastically.

"- and I'm sorry I lied. Well… I didn't lie when I said I wasn't going to go. It was a last minute decision, really."

Ron stopped and stared at her. "You…lied, Hermione," he said with his finger pointed at her. "When I asked you three days ago if you sent the reply you said yes, but didn't tell me that you accepted it.  _That_  was a bloody lie. Don't try to use your bloody logic to tell me otherwise."

Hermione put her hands up in surrender and said, "Alright, I lied. I'm sorry, but…isn't that what you wanted? I mean, for me to see a Mind Healer? Also, let's not forget that you were the one who made that appointment…behind  _my_  back."

She could see Ron's temper rising once again as he sent a twig flying with his foot, and watched it snap against a tree trunk. "I did that for  _you_! To help  _you_!" he shouted. "Yeah, it was without your permission, but I  _did_  tell you. I didn't lie to your bloody face!"

"You only told me because you had no choice!" Hermione shouted back, feeling her own face go red with anger. "You had to tell me before we came back here. You were the one who started this whole thing by sending that owl in the first place."

"What I did was try to help you, Hermione," Ron said, lowering his voice. He pointed at her again. "What  _you_  did was shut me out completely by lying and avoiding me for days. Why the hell would you even want to hide something like this anyway? It doesn't make sense, unless you-"

"I didn't want you to worry about me," she interrupted, knowing that it wouldn't be enough to convince him to drop the subject.

"Okay," he said and looked up towards the sky for a moment. "So, why did you decide to go after saying you weren't going to?"

"It doesn't matter," Hermione said with a frustrated sigh. "I wanted to get help, just like  _you_  suggested, and I did."

She turned her back to him and placed her hand on her chest, willing her heart to slow down. She sniffed and realized she was crying when cold tears ran down her hot face.

_I have to make him see that I'm okay. That I have to do this on my own. I can't let him know what happened in the loo. He's only upset about the appointment. He doesn't need to know the rest._

"I can tell it's more than that… What is going on with you?" Ron asked, almost begging for an answer. He sounded overwhelmed and confused, which made Hermione feel worse. She heard the rustle of leaves and saw Ron's shadow grow in front of her before she felt his presence behind her.

With tears streaming down her face she said, "I don't want to take you for granted, Ron. I have to do this on my own."

"Can you at least turn around while you try to break up with me?" he said, his voice breaking.

Hermione froze with a frown and turned around slowly. He was still glaring at her, not so much in anger, but with a fiery determination in his eyes.

"What?" she said incredulously.

"Go ahead and try it, Hermione. Tell me you want to be on your own and that you're doing this to spare me," Ron said, his voice now shaking with emotion. Hermione held her breath as he stepped in closer and bent his knees until he was level with her face. "If you think I'm going to let you just walk away from me, you're dead wrong. I will _never_  let you go. Never."

Hermione was confused about why he was talking about her leaving him, but his last declaration was not to be questioned. Coming from anyone else, it might have sounded like a threat, but Ron stating the fact that he would never let her go with so much vehemence made Hermione's knees go weak.

"Why… would you think that I wanted to…leave you?" Hermione asked through panted breaths. She had to arch her neck to look at him as he stood erect.

"I'm not daft, Hermione. The way you've been acting lately is about a lot more than seeing a Mind Healer," he said. "You've been avoiding me, not looking me in the eye and we haven't…made love in days. What am I supposed to think?"

Hermione was struck by the desperation in his voice and dejection in his face. She wanted to reach out and touch his skin, kiss him and tell him everything was alright; that they would be perfect, but she couldn't. Not while she still held on to so much hell inside of her, keeping it to herself.

"I will never leave you, Ron," Hermione said and tentatively reached out to touch the back of his hand with her fingers. She looked up at him and set her face to look as determined as his. He deserved that much, she thought. " _Never_."

She saw him breathe out soundly through his mouth, relieved, but still troubled.

"I don't get it, then," Ron said and slowly took his hand away from her. "We made a promise in Australia, remember? You told me you would never hide anything from me. How can I trust you? Don't you trust me?"

"I do trust you!" Hermione exclaimed as he took a step away from her.

"Well… I don't know if I trust you, Hermione."

Ron seemed surprised by his own words as he walked away and sat down heavily on a nearby tree stump, staring intensely at the ground with his arms on his knees.

She felt her heart racing again as the air was suddenly too thin around her from his absence. In that moment there was a fissure in their connection and Hermione felt it, as if it was her own heart breaking.

"You're right, there is something else I didn't tell you," Hermione said with a sigh. Before she could stop herself Hermione walked over to Ron and kneeled on the ground in front of him, sliding between his legs so he would have to sit up and look at her.

"Remember after you and Harry got your letters from the Ministry, about the changes to the Auror training?"

Ron didn't answer, but she knew he did so she continued, "And I went inside to help your mum, but went upstairs to the loo?"

Again there was silence. She looked up to see him staring at her in deep concentration.

"When I was outside I kept seeing these images of you and Harry…dead. I felt so sure that when you become Aurors that it's going to essentially…kill you."

"And now?" Ron finally spoke in a low voice.

"Now…I mean, the fear is always going to be there, right?"

"I reckon so, yeah," he said softly.

"I'm terrified of losing both of you…especially  _you_ , Ron. More than should be normal, I think. I can't handle it." She shook her head and said, "I had to walk away because… I couldn't sit there and listen to how excited you were about leaving for training and all that. It made my head spin thinking about it."

"Bloody hell," Ron breathed out and ran his hands through his hair. "I already know that you have issues with me being an Auror. I wasn't expecting you to jump for joy when we read those letters. There was no need to run away like you did, Hermione."

"I had to because I was feeling overwhelmed and-"

"I would have helped you, you know that! I can't if you keep telling me you're fine or avoid me by walking away. You have to let me in, Hermione."

Hermione dropped her head again to take a deep breath and smoothed her hair back. She had been trying to back pedal her anxiety away from Ron so that he didn't have to worry and take care of her, but instead she was making it even more obvious that she was far from okay.

She studied Ron's face, full of concern and confusion as well as unconditional love and commitment. She could see in his eyes that he was willing to do everything for her, no matter the cost to his pride. She realized that it was time for her to do the same; let him inside her head long enough to help her, so that she can help him before she does irreversible damage to the most important relationship of her life.

"I had a panic attack in the loo that day," Hermione said hastily and watched Ron's face slowly turn to shock then realization. "I was able to get a hold of it, but…"

"Fuck, Hermione," he sighed and rubbed his neck with both hands. "So when you came out and I was there… you just had an attack... I can't believe I didn't notice. Was it bad?" He looked at with so much apprehension that Hermione just nodded and bit her lip to keep from crying.

"It was horrible," she said and let out a whimper as she felt the tears fall against her will. She sat up on her knees and leaned forward to rest her forehead on Ron's chest, not caring if he was still angry enough to throw her off or not. "I was doing so well until that happened. That's why I decided to say yes to the Mind Healer."

She felt Ron's hands graze her back as if he wasn't sure if he should touch her yet. She shivered and slid in closer to him, her hands grasping onto the front of his shirt. "I didn't tell you because…because I was embarrassed and…and stupid. I thought I could just get the help on my own and be better… for myself and for you. I just want to be better."

Hermione felt Ron's chest rise as he took in a deep breath and finally laid his hands flat on her back. She quickly wrapped her arms around his neck, crying harder as he brought her closer to him and buried her face under his chin. Ron remained silent, holding her tightly as she whispered, "I'm… so… sorry," between heavy sobs.

Hermione was gripping him so hard that her knees were starting to ache from being pressed up against the tree stump, but she didn't dare let go. Just moments ago he couldn't even look at her without spitting fire and now she was in Ron's arms, his familiar warmth swallowing her up and making her feel safe again.

"I don't want to be alone," Hermione said hoarsely when she was able to speak again. "I feel so broken. I need you, Ron. Just to hear you and see you aren't enough." She felt him loosen his hold on her, but she just pulled him closer. "Please, don't let go… Say something."

When she heard Ron sniff and clear his throat she lifted her head and saw him wipe his eyes with the forefinger and thumb of one hand.

"Fuck," Ron muttered and squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head. "I wish you had told me, Hermione. This is so fucked up."

"I know," Hermione said sadly and replaced her head on his chest. She took a shuddering breath and touched the fingertips to his cheek. He leaned into her hand as she stroked along his jaw and chin. "I'm so sorry I put us through this. I don't deserve you. I wouldn't blame you if you're fed up with me."

"Don't ever say that," he said gruffly and grabbed her hand from his face, gripping it inside of his. "Besides, it's just as much my fault. I should have seen the signs. I should have asked you what was wrong when I first noticed you weren't acting yourself. I reckon I didn't want to ask because…I didn't want to give you a chance to chuck me. Stupid, right?"

Hermione shook her head and said, "No, I can see why you would jump to that conclusion. I wasn't exactly easy to read this past week, was I?"

"Definitely not. I was going fucking mental thinking you wanted to leave me. I almost got my arse fired today, you know."

"Oh, Ron," Hermione said and pulled their clasped hands under her chin and against his chest. "I had no idea I was making you think something like that. I've made such a mess of things."

"Yeah…but it could have been worse I reckon. At least it's all out there now… right?"

Hermione nodded her head and pressed her lips to his knuckles. Without another word, she felt Ron bring his legs together and pull her up onto his lap. She sat across his thighs with her knees bent against his stomach as he wrapped one hand around her shoulders and the other around her legs, hugging her close.

"We'll be okay, Hermione. You just have to trust me to take care of you. I'm not going anywhere. I need you, too," he whispered and kissed the top of her head.

Hermione made a whimpering sound and gripped Ron's torso, her hands pressing into the muscles of his back through his shirt as she curled into him. She laid her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, breathing in Ron's smell, grateful to be able to so at all. She could be sitting on the ground, alone and rejected, instead of being held by the person she had hurt so badly and loved more than anything else.

After a long silence Hermione raised her head to look at him and whispered, "So what do we do now?"

Ron hesitated for a moment. "I don't know."

"Maybe I can tell you about the appointment," she said and stretched her legs to hang over the side of his lap and pulled her arms from around him. "Do you want to hear about it?"

"Yeah… I do," he said and smoothed his hand over her exposed knee. Hermione had to fight the urge to forget about talking and kiss him as he sent shivers up her spine from the simple touch. He was staring at her with a serious expression, his other hand on her back, waiting for her to speak.

"Well, first of all," Hermione started as she shook the inappropriate thoughts from her head, "the Healer that was assigned to me had no idea who I was."

Ron looked at her skeptically. "You're taking the piss. How is that possible? We're all over the bleeding papers."

"She's from America and, apparently, she never received any news from our Ministry over there."

"Bollocks," he said.

"I know," she said shaking head. "It was a strange hour, to say the least."

She went on to tell him about the rest of the session, every detail from the toys on the shelves to the long and annoyingly uncomfortable silences and the strange questions.

"Blimey," Ron said when she was finished. "Do you reckon she's any good? Will you see her again?"

Hermione nodded and said, "Yes, I am. She said she would look it all up… It's strange, but I think it's sort of refreshing that she doesn't know much about us, you know?"

"Yeah, I suppose," Ron said slowly, after a moment of hesitation. "As long as you're okay with it. When do you go again?"

"Next week. Double session, believe it or not," Hermione said and rolled her eyes. She was glad she and Ron were talking normally again, but the subject was not one that she wanted to dwell on for too long. She knew seeing a Mind Healer was necessary at this point, but she didn't have to enjoy it.

"Can I go with you?"

Hermione sighed and said, "I wish you could, but I don't think you're allowed. It's more of a one on one situation."

"That's alright," he said and smiled at her. It was a small smile, but Hermione sat up straighter and smiled back, her chest tightening at the simple expression. "I'll make sure to get off work when you're done and we can talk about it afterwards. Is that okay?"

She smiled wider and nodded. "I would love that. Thank you," she said and reached her hands up to cup his cheeks. They were warm and pink; his freckles more prominent from exposure to the sun. Her smile faded as she stared into his eyes and said, "You're a wonderful and loyal person, Ron Weasley."

She moved her hands down to his neck and rested her forehead against his. She watched as he closed his eyes and felt his hands travel up her back. They were both breathing heavy as the tension built. She wanted to kiss him and hold him closer, but she needed to tell him how she felt, to ease his mind and make everything clear for him so nothing else can be questioned ever again.

"You're so brave and honest and…" she paused when she saw a tear fall from one of his closed eyes. She used her thumb to wipe it away and felt his hands slide under her shirt and rest on the skin of her back.

"I love you so much," she continued, caressing his neck, then his chest and back up through his hair. "We're both so lucky to have one another…after so long and so many obstacles. To have you here, holding me after what I did... You're amazing."

Hermione closed her eyes when Ron's hands crawled higher and pressed firmly, rubbing back down over her bra strap to the edge of her shorts. Their faces were slick from the heat and slid against each other so that her nose was on his cheek. With her mouth only an inch away from his she said, "I want to be amazing for you, Ron. I want to be the person that makes you feel even a tenth of how you make me feel. I have to because I love you. Can you forgive me and say you'll help me? Please."

Hermione opened her eyes finally when she felt his head move against hers in what felt like confirmation, an answer to her plea for forgiveness. She breathed out a laugh as she smiled and saw him do the same, although his eyes remained closed.

Suddenly his lips were on hers. She tasted the salt from his tears that had tracked across his lips and kissed him back, grabbing the hair behind his neck and pulling him closer. His tongue delved inside her mouth as his hands moved to her waist, kneading and pulling her in. Their chests collided and Hermione gasped at the intensity of Ron's passion. They shared many kisses and embraces over the past few months, but she never felt anything like this from him before. There was desperation mixed in with his enthusiasm, and she felt it too, fueling her actions as she clung to him, not seeming to be able to get close enough.

"I love you," Ron said breathlessly as he pulled away and dug his fingers into her lower back. He looked fiercely into her eyes and said, "But don't you ever fucking do that to me again, Hermione. Do you understand?"

Hermione opened her eyes wide at the force behind his words and nodded quickly. His intensity was having a profound effect on her insides and she felt the area between her legs grow warmer.

"I understand," she said and swallowed against the spike of yearning that washed over her body.

"Sorted," Ron simply said then pulled her roughly to him and crushed his mouth to hers. She grabbed his face, his jaw flexing and moving under her hands as they attacked each other's mouths hungrily.

"I missed this," Ron panted then sucked on her top lip, "so bloody much."

Hermione moaned and took his bottom lip into her mouth and dragged it between her teeth before letting it go. She opened her eyes to find him already looking at her and knew what he was thinking. She nodded and scrambled off of his lap to stand in front of him. Her trembling fingers pulled at the fastenings of her shorts until she felt them give way and slid them off. As her knickers hit the ground she looked up to see Ron toss his wand aside after doing the spell on himself and unzip his jeans, pulling them just under his bum. She quickly straddled his lap, just as he pulled himself out from his pants, and lowered herself onto him.

"I missed  _this_ ," she said and gasped again as she rolled her hips and felt him twitch inside of her.

"Fuck, you feeling so fucking good, Hermione," Ron said. He pulled her closer and kissed the tender skin under her ear.

Hermione bucked her hips against his, feeling him slide in and out of her, both gasping with every thrust. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he held her with his hands tight on her hips and bum. He helped her as she rode him harder and faster, pulling her in and lifting her up, gaining momentum. They grunted and moaned loudly as their lips and tongues wet each other's faces and necks, sucking and biting with heightened arousal.

Hermione felt the release coming fast as her heart quickened along with their pace that Ron had taken over, setting the speed and rhythm.

"Oh… Ron. Oh. Oh. Oh," she muttered rapidly, the pounding between her legs pressed against her stomach then hit her hard, over and over again as she pulled his hair and bit his jaw.

Ron yelled out, cursing, and slammed her down onto him. She felt the cool sensation of his release fill her up as the last of hers died down to a dull humming.

"Holy fuck," Ron breathed out and pulled her panting, clammy body into his, burrowing his face into her hair. They both whimpered when he pulled out and she clung onto him with her limp arms. "You already  _are_  amazing, Hermione," he said, gasping for breath, and squeezed her tighter. "I just thought I'd let you know."

Hermione sighed into neck and kissed the closest skin she could find. "No, I'm not. But I will."


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Yes, there's a big ass motherloving lemon in there, people! I'm talking smut to the unf degree.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

The sun was still hanging high in the clear blue sky as Ron and Hermione walked slowly toward the Burrow, hand in hand. Their steps were lazy, but Hermione's mouth was moving at a rapid pace. Ron listened as she talked animatedly about one thing after another. Any other time he would have found her nervous rambling amusing and endearing. He would have thought of something clever to say just to tease her and watch her pretend to pout. Hermione seemed to be in better spirits, but Ron could tell she was only using her words to cover the tension that was still in the air between them.

"I'm absolutely starving," Hermione said as she rubbed her belly. "I haven't eaten since breakfast with my mum. She makes a wonderful crepe, but I'm afraid it wasn't as filling as I thought it would be. I really should have eaten something before I left. Goodness, I sound like you, Ron." She chuckled uneasily and cleared her throat. "Do you think your mum would mind if I nicked a bit of food? Did you eat already? I can make us bacon sandwiches if you like."

"Yeah, sure," Ron said glancing at her and sighing.

"Oh, good because… I'm really hungry," she finished lamely and ran her fingers through her hair making it even bushier, and tucking it behind her ear. They lapsed into silence before walking through the wards and across the length of grass to the Burrow.

It was just hours ago that Ron was angry and bitter, ready to hex the next person who looked at him sideways. He almost nearly did. Since learning that Hermione never had any intention to ditch him and they were able to talk things out, he felt like they had reached a new level in their relationship. They even shagged furiously on a bloody tree stump – even though his arse is now paying dearly for it. He should be rejoicing and relieved that they were still together. Although he was no longer angry, Ron's emotions were now a confusing blend of elation, disbelief and trepidation.

He couldn't stop wondering: If he hadn't left work early and gone over to her parents' house when he did, would Hermione have ever told him the truth? Would she have continued to be distant and avoid him? How far would she have gone to keep secrets from him? He's seen her at her best when it came to deception; coming up with that story first year with the troll, hiding that blasted time-turner almost all of third year, forming Dumbledore's Army in fifth year, and lying to Umbridge's face about a "weapon" in the forest (Ron's personal favorite.). Ron then thought about how relentless she was on finding the truth about The Half-Blood Prince, and when she insisted on leaving money while pilfering food on the run under the invisibility cloak. Hermione was a plethora of contradiction, something that Ron found fascinating and extremely alluring.

However, it was a completely different feeling when the deception was directed towards him. He had no idea how they can get back to where they were before, but he'll be damned if he let them both stew in uncertainty longer than they had to. He felt as if he had aged in years over the course of the day and he was bloody tired.

"Ron? Did you hear me?"

Ron turned to Hermione, surprised that his thoughts had turned a deaf ear to her. "I'm sorry, what?"

Hermione looked at him curiously and answered, "I said I must have missed Teddy. Where is Harry anyway?"

As they walked closer to his house Ron noticed that Harry and Ginny were no longer on the blanket with Teddy. Instead he saw Ginny alone, hurling garden gnomes over the bushes with such force that her hair whipped around her face after every throw. She ran after another one, shoving her hair out of her face furiously, and grabbed the gnome by its tiny feet, arms flailing around its face.

"Oi! Ginny!" Ron called out, dropping Hermione's hand and jogging to where Ginny stood holding the gnome and glaring in Ron's direction.

"What is it, Ron?" Ginny said impatiently when Ron caught up to her. The gnome had gathered its strength and folded its plump little body in half to bite Ginny on her finger.

"Bleeding fucker!" She dropped the gnome on its head and watched as it scampered off.

"Ouch," Ron said, cringing. He knew all too well what those bites felt like, but had become used to them over the years. Ginny, however, never participated in gnome throwing with him and their brothers, which was why he was looking at her with concern.

"Yeah, ouch. Damn it, Ron, it's your fault. You distracted me," she whined then turned to Hermione when she saw her reach Ron's side. "You missed Teddy, Hermione," Ginny said flatly and sucked on her wounded finger.

"Yes, I know. I really wanted to see him. We got… caught up," Hermione said. Ron glanced at her and they shared an uneasy look.

"I'm sure you did," Ginny said without her usual smirk. She turned her back on them and bent down low to look for more gnomes.

"What the hell are you doing?" Ron finally said, coming to the conclusion that Ginny wasn't going to be forthright about whatever was obviously bothering her.

"What does it look like, you twit?"

"Ginny, are you alright?" Hermione said, ignoring Ginny's insult and Ron's indignant face. "Where's Harry?"

"And everyone else?" Ron added.

"Well," Ginny said, giving up on her search for rogue gnomes and facing the pair. "Mum and dad left to see Percy. Mrs. Tonks came to get Teddy a bit ago and Harry's… he's been in your room every since."

"They left you alone?" Ron asked, bewildered. He couldn't believe that his parents would willingly leave Harry and Ginny to their own devices in an empty house.

"They only just left. Keep your shirt on."

"Why aren't you with Harry then?" Ron asked. Not that he wanted her with him alone, doing Merlin knows what, but it was curious to him that she was outside and Harry was inside. They normally never left each other's sight these days.

"I was!" Ginny exclaimed. "He said he wanted to be alone so…"

"It must have hit him hard after seeing Teddy. With Lupin and Tonks…" Hermione said softly.

"Yes, that's exactly it, but when I brought it up, he got all  _Harry_  on me." Ginny pulled her hair, frustrated and glared at the house as if trying to reach Harry's eyes through the walls.

"It's not like you to listen when someone tells you to bugger off," Ron said.

"Well he wasn't exactly polite about it, was he?" she said and folded her arms over her chest.

Ron and Hermione shared a look, all too familiar with Harry's need to isolate himself when in one of his brooding moods.

"What exactly did he say?" Hermione asked, stepping close to Ginny and touching her arm.

"Doesn't matter," she said shaking her head."It was nothing."

Ron watched as his sister bit her lip and tightened her arms across her chest. He felt conflicted between anger towards Harry for upsetting Ginny and concern for his best friend who was obviously in a shitty state.

"I'll go talk to him," Ron said, cracking his knuckles.

"Ron, don't be like that. He's just having a moment or whatever," Ginny said, stopping him from leaving. "I wasn't too nice myself before I left him there sulking." She glared once more at the house and huffed. "Forget it. I'm not really angry with him. I'm just worried and frustrated is all."

"I can understand that," Hermione said. "But you have to be more patient with him."

Ron backed away as Ginny fixed Hermione with an icy glare. "I am, Hermione!" she snapped at her. "You're not around enough lately to see that, are you? Both of you!" Ron flinched as her glare turned on him.

"Oi!" Ron said, coming to Hermione and his defense.

Ginny sighed heavily and kicked at a tuft of grass near her trainer. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

"No," Hermione said thoughtfully then looked at Ron. "She's right. We haven't been there for him like we have for each other. Oh, not like that!" She smacked his arm when he gave her a shocked and disgusted face. "You know what I mean. Ginny, I'm so sorry."

"You're his best friends," Ginny said in a strained voice, looking between the both of them. "I wasn't with you guys while you were out there. And I get it: You're both in love and that's brilliant, but he needs you. I can only do so much." She looked on the verge of tears and that is what made Ron step forward and pull her into a hug. Her hands squeezed his back briefly before hastily letting go. He noticed that she hadn't shed one tear, but was blinking rapidly against glassy brown eyes.

"Gin, you know how he feels about you," Ron said with his hands on her shoulders. "Besides all the bloody snogging and whatnot. He used to say your name in his sleep. It was disgusting." Ginny let out a snort and smirked at Ron. "So… he does need you; just as much, if not more, than us, yeah?"

Ginny took a deep breath and smiled at Hermione. "Is this your doing then? Since when is Ron so bloody mature and ready to give out advice?"

"Oi! I have my moments. Don't I, Hermione?" He turned to Hermione and caught a look of pride and admiration in her eyes that swelled his heart and his ego immensely.

Hermione smiled and said, "You most certainly do, Ron. He's right, Ginny. He needs all of us."

He beamed at Ginny who shook her head and glanced back at the house again, her grin fading.

"Look," Ron said and stepped up to Ginny once more. "I'll go talk to him, but if there's anything that warrants an arse kicking let me know right now."

Ginny rolled her eyes at him. "No, Ron. Please keep Harry's arse kick-free."

"Sorted," Ron said and tugged on a lock of Ginny's long red hair. He turned to Hermione and squeezed her hand briefly before jogging toward the back door of the Burrow.

* * *

Ginny's words echoed in Ron's head as he stopped at the landing in front of his bedroom door. He and Hermione were the only ones who could even come close to understanding what Harry was going through. He knew that Harry needed his space when he was in one of his moods, but this was different. The world was different. They were all changed after the war and it was barmy to think otherwise.

All Ron wanted was for everyone to move on and be happy with their lives. When he thought about the reasons why this simple wish was so bloody hard to make come true he wanted to either punch a wall or crawl under a rock and weep. He did neither and instead carried on as usual, doing his best to help fix whatever needed mending. The pressure was doing him in, but he had to do one more thing before he could even consider taking time to give into his temper and grief. He had done it once already at Hermione's house in her loo and for him that was enough crying to be getting on with as far as he was concerned.

Ron closed his eyes as Hermione came to mind and all that needed to be repaired in their relationship. He knew they were headed in the right direction, but, once again, wishing something to happen without the inevitable pain was too much to ask. He shook his head and opened his eyes. Thoughts of Hermione would have to wait. At the moment he had to focus on Harry.

He opened the door and his eyes went to the cot where Harry was lying on his back, throwing a dented quaffle into the air and catching it.

"Oi, you bloody wanker!" Ron said after closing the door. He reached out with one long arm and caught the quaffle swiftly in mid-air. Bouncing it around in his hands, he strolled over to his bed and plopped down, throwing it back to Harry who was sitting up in the cot.

"Did you find Hermione?" Harry said. Hermione's name came out of his mouth with a puff of air as the quaffle hit his chest with more force than necessary. "Blimey, Ron," he said in annoyance, rubbing his chest and eyeing Ron warily.

"Yeah, I found her. All in one piece and as beautiful as ever." Ron pushed himself up until his back was against the wall and motioned for Harry to throw the quaffle back to him.

"That's good," Harry said, tossing it to Ron, making it spin.

"Shit," Ron muttered, flexing his fingers after catching the fast flying quaffle with both hands.

"Serves you right," Harry snorted.

Ron studied Harry as he considered how hard his next throw should be or if he should just get to the point of why they were both sitting there. Harry was smirking at him, but there was definitely sadness behind his eyes and bags under his eyes. Since Ron and Hermione had come back from Australia, Hermione spent every night with him, and Harry slept downstairs with Ginny. Ron reckoned Harry must not have been sleeping well and felt like a git for not noticing earlier.

As Harry palmed the quaffle in his hand, ready to toss it back, Ron said, "Did you show Ginny how to throw gnomes?"

Harry froze then set the quaffle down on his knee with a quizzical look. "No… why?"

"Well, she's out there right now chucking those things as if they insulted The Chudley Canons or something."

"That's you, Ron," Harry said dryly.

"Right. No matter," Ron said quickly. "The point is she's actually rather good. Of course that could be because of the pissed off mood she's in."

"Pissed off, really?" Harry said and scratched his nose. Ron watched Harry fidget, adjusting his glasses and peering at a spot near the desk.

"Yeah, she said something about you sounding her off, but wouldn't say much more than that."

"Yeah, about that," Harry said slowly.

"Look," Ron interjected before Harry could finish. "Whatever is going on with you two that's your business, but she's my little sister, mate. I can't just ignore it when she's about to bloody cry."

Harry whipped his head around to look at Ron and said incredulously, "She was… crying?"

Ron sighed at Harry's shocked and concerned face. He hated being in the middle, but he was getting sick and tired of all the misunderstandings and hidden feelings everyone seems to be carrying around lately.

"No, I said she was about to cry. With her it's almost the same thing, I reckon." Ron paused, trying to figure out the best way to voice his next concern. "Harry, if there's something you want to, you know, talk about, or whatever… I'm right here. We're all here, mate."

Harry set the quaffle down on the floor and ran his hands through his already messy black hair. He looked pained as he stared at Ron and said in a small voice, "I think I'm going mental, Ron."

Ron sucked in a breath through his nose and moved to the edge of the bed to give Harry his undivided attention. Somehow, he had hit a nerve with Harry that made him want to finally open up. He nodded silently at Harry, not wanting to make him to stop talking by saying something he would have to pull his foot out of mouth for later.

"I keep having these nightmares," Harry said so quietly that Ron had to lean his head forward a bit more to catch his every word. "I wake up sweating and all I remember is blood and bodies. That's all. I reckon that might be enough to fill in the blanks, yeah?"

Ron clasped his hands in front of him and nodded slowly. He could relate, having had his share of nightmares for months. He figured those were inevitable for everyone, but Harry made it sound as if his were so severe he was waking up in a cold sweat every night. A wave of sympathy went out to Ginny as he thought what she must be going through while having to witness it.

"So, what happened today?"

"I dunno. I mean, seeing Teddy was great and all. He's perfect," Harry said smiling. "I was so wrapped up in seeing him that when he left I guess it all hit me at once about Lupin and Tonks. It's not fair he will never meet them, you know?"

Ron nodded, understanding exactly what Harry was talking about. One day his own children will never get to meet their uncle, Fred. It was a painful thought that made Ron's stomach turn.

Harry continued, "Ginny tried talking to me, but… fuck I was such an arse to her."

"Yeah, you must've been, but she'll be alright," Ron conceded. He thought about Hermione and how she bottled up her feelings. It wasn't good for her or their relationship. He would hate to see something like that happen with Harry and Ginny. "Ginny's tough, but mostly she's worried about you, Harry. Just talk to her and open up a bit, like you are now."

Harry nodded and said, "Yeah, you're right. It's more than that, though. I've been reading the Daily Prophet every day and the world is still fucked up. I mean, I didn't expect roses to grow out of everyone's arse, but it almost feels like… it was all for nothing." He looked as if he hated saying the last part, as if it pained him to even think like that. "What do you think?"

Ron's insides were a mess of nerves and apprehension. He hated seeing Harry look so depressed and hopeless. He felt himself get angry at those bastard Deatheaters that were running loose, still causing trouble in the name of You Know Who. He was angry at the world for not fixing itself in time for them to be happy. He knew he was thinking unreasonably, but he was desperate. Here he was with the  _Boy Who Bloody Won_ , the person who once and for all killed the most evil wizard to ever live, and instead of looking at a proud hero he was looking at a defeated looking boy asking for reassurance that the most important thing he ever did in his life was worth it.

"I think," Ron said through his teeth and digging his fingers into his thighs, "that I'm fucking livid we're even having this conversation, Harry. What you did - what we all did - was what we had to do to fucking  _live_."

Harry went to interrupt, but Ron suddenly stood up and began pacing the small area between the beds and kept talking. "And don't give me that rubbish about the ones who died because if you remember one of those people was my brother, and I refuse to believe that he died for nothing."

"I'm sorry, Ron. I didn't-"

But Ron wasn't finished as he stopped pacing and walked up to Harry, watching him open his eyes wide to look up at his tall figure. "We're going to become Aurors, Harry. We're going to grab every one of those fuckers and put them away. And the whole time we're going to do it for them. And we'll do it for Hermione and Ginny, our whole bleeding family and our friends."

He took a step back and felt a familiar lump in his throat start to form. He watched Harry gulp and look down at the floor and he swore if Harry started crying he was going to lose it for sure. "I might sound like a tosser right now, but I don't bloody care," Ron said and cleared his throat. "We'll do it for each other - me and you. So that  _we_  can be happy, yeah?"

Harry stood up with him and said shakily, "I'm-"

"Don't fucking say you're sorry, Harry, or I'll go back on my word to Ginny and kick your arse."

Harry's face broke into a reluctant grin and he shook his head. "Alright, but can I say thanks? I mean, not just for now, but… for everything? I don't think I've said that enough over the past – what – seven years?"

"It will be seven full years next week, mate," Ron said adding in his own grin. The mood felt lighter as the tension washed away with the harsh words and confessions that needed to made, but not forgotten.

Harry rubbed his neck and looked at Ron nervously. "Do we er… hug or whatever? I feel like this moment requires one, but I don't want to get you all excited."

Ron guffawed and punched Harry hard in the left shoulder. "Fuck you."

And they hugged, patting each other on the back and allowing it to last just a second longer than necessary.

"So how is it going with Hermione anyway?" Harry asked when they separated and sat back down on their respective beds. "And please leave out any… details, if you know what I mean," he said with a shudder.

Ron laughed then let it fade as the events from the day caught up with him, making him feel on edge. He wasn't sure how much he wanted to share with Harry about what happened, only because it was Hermione's business to tell.

"We had a row today," he said, looking down at his hands.

"What else is new," Harry said, chuckling. He stopped when Ron didn't return the laugh.

"This one was big," Ron said. "She's having some issues with me - and you as well - being an Auror and it came to head today. We're alright now, but I have a feeling this isn't the end of it."

"Yeah, I noticed she was uncomfortable the other day when we got those letters," Harry said thoughtfully. "Do you want me to talk to her? If she's that worried maybe I can help or something."

Ron sat up and shook his head vigorously. "No, don't. She'll only think I put you up to it."

"If you're sure."

Ron stood up and walked to the window, looking down to search for Hermione and Ginny. The garden was empty so he guessed they were inside, most likely eating in the kitchen.

"Harry?"

"Yeah?"

Ron glanced at him then looked away, embarrassed about what he was about to ask. However, his curiosity was killing him and he just had to know, no matter how disturbing the answer might be for the both of them.

"Did my dad ever, you know, talk to you?"

Harry laughed and looked at Ron as if he were nutters. "Er, yeah, Ron. We talk all the time."

Ron rolled his eyes, not realizing how unclear he was. "I mean, about, you know… Harry, help me out here."

"What the bloody hell are you on about?" Harry asked, thoroughly enjoying Ron's awkwardness.

"Sex, Harry. Bloody fuck," Ron said and sank down onto his desk chair.

"Oh! Well… I don't – I mean – why would – what?"

Ron smirked as Harry was now the one fumbling with his words. "I'm asking because Hermione's dad gave me 'the talk' today and it was awkward as all hell."

"I wish I had seen that," Harry said, laughing. Then he suddenly looked nervous and averted his eyes from Ron. "Yeah, Mr. Weasley gave me the whole protection speech and all that."

"Good," Ron said, but he wasn't satisfied. His instinct was to look out for his sister. He considered it his unwritten duty to protect her, and protecting requires knowledge. "Have you and Ginny ever…you know?"

Harry's foot started tapping on the rug and his face had turned a shade of red that rivaled Ron's after a full day in the sun. "Er… why exactly do you need to know this?"

Ron groaned impatiently and said, "Just tell me the truth and we can be done with this whole disgusting conversation."

"Alright… yes," Harry said quickly and peered at Ron over the top of his glasses. "And you and Hermione?" he asked slowly, cringing the whole time.

"Yeah," Ron said and looked away from Harry towards the window. He heard Harry make a non-committal noise and clear his throat.

The awkwardness in the room was worse than when he talked to Hugo about shagging his daughter. Perhaps it was because he knew Harry longer and better then he did Hugo. Ron was aware that Harry and Hermione thought of one other as siblings, much the same as he and Ginny. Knowing what the other has done with their respective sisters suddenly felt like more information than they both wanted. Ron was glad the conversation was over, but now they were sitting in an uncomfortable silence; something that neither one has experienced while alone together.

There was a tapping on the closed door, making them both jump and grin sheepishly at each other. Before they could stand, the door opened and a head of bushy brown hair entered through the crack. Ron's demeanor became both relaxed and tense at the same time when he saw her face peering into the room.

"Is everything alright up here? I sense something just happened. What's happened?" Hermione asked anxiously, looking from Harry to Ron.

Ron rolled his eyes and said, "It's alright, Hermione. We were just talking is all."

She smiled gratefully and entered the room, closing the door behind her. Ron watched as Hermione made her way to his bed, sitting cross legged on top of the sheets.

"Where's Ginny?" Harry asked at once.

"She flooed over to Percy's house," Hermione said loftily, studying Harry's reaction.

"She  _left_?" Ron asked, stunned. Harry was staring at Hermione in disbelief and guilt.

"She left because of me, didn't she?" Harry said.

Hermione softened and looked at Harry sympathetically. "Partly because of you, but she said she wanted us to spend time together. She isn't angry with you, Harry. I promise."

"Are you sure?" Harry said warily and glanced toward the door. Ron thought he looked as if he wanted to run downstairs and floo straight to Percy's house to find her.

"Yes, Harry, I'm sure," Hermione said firmly. "I told her you needed your space, but to not let you wallow in it. You do tend to wallow, Harry."

"It's true, mate," Ron piped in. "Wallowing is like your calling card or something."

"Alright, I get it," Harry said, putting his hands up in surrender. "I'll work on my bloody wallowing."

"And we'll work on spending more time together, the three of us," Hermione said and joined Harry on the cot, taking his hand in hers. "We're going to be separated once I leave for Hogwarts and I'm going to miss you like mad. I want to make sure we're still okay."

Harry reached over to give her a hug and said, "I'll miss you, too, Hermione. We'll always be okay. More than okay, so don't worry."

Hermione looked at Ron over Harry's shoulder, giving him a sad smile. Ron knew she was thinking of the day when they had to say good-bye. He smiled back because even though things weren't a hundred percent between them, it pained him to see her unhappy.

When they pulled apart Ron stood up and stretched, yawning loudly. "Sorry, long day," he said when he saw Harry and Hermione staring at him. "I don't know about the both of you, but I've had enough talk about bloody feelings for one day."

"Right, well…" Hermione said quietly, looking down at her hands. She looked upset and embarrassed, and Ron realized what his words must have implied.

"I didn't… I just meant that I want to do something fun. Something that doesn't make me want to punch myself in the face." Ron said quickly.

"What I think Ron is trying to say," Harry said shaking his head at Ron then looking at Hermione, "is that we should take advantage of the time together and do something a bit less... serious."

"Exactly," Ron said, relieved. "Alright?"

"What do you want to do then?" Hermione asked, smiling up at Ron. He hesitated, studying her face for any lines of worry, but didn't find any cause for concern.

"Okay, well, did you eat already?"

"Yes I did," she said as a matter of factly.

"Then I reckon we should do something muggle-ish," Ron said and wiggled his brows at Harry who regarded him suspiciously.

"I don't like that look," Harry said nervously and stood up with his arms crossed.

Ron laughed and said, "Nothing dangerous or anything like that. Look, both of my best mates lived in the muggle world and not once have you two invited me to see a picture moving thing."

"A film?" Hermione asked and laughed along with Harry.

"Yeah, whatever," Ron said also laughing. "What do you say? It's still early and we can get back here before dinner."

Harry shrugged and said, "Sounds brilliant. Hermione?"

"Oh, alright," she said and joined them. Ron could see her getting excited as her lips turned up into a wide grin. "It is a brilliant idea!" she exclaimed, bouncing on her heels.

From Ron's height over Hermione, and their close proximity, he had a clear view down her shirt as she bounced, her breasts moving delightfully inside her shirt. He almost told them to forget it and pushed Harry out of the room, but this was his idea, and if he were honest spending time with both of them together was something he truly missed.

"We'll leave a note for your mum, dad and Ginny," Harry said to Ron as he opened the door, leading the way down the stairs. "Hermione you can pick the film. I have no idea what's out these days."

"No problem," Hermione said excitedly as she moved to follow him. However, Ron suddenly reached out and grabbed her arm making her stop before she mounted the stairs.

"We'll be right down, Harry!" Ron called out before pulling Hermione back into the room and slamming the door. He could hear Harry yell something up the stairs, but he wasn't paying attention.

"What's the matter, Ron?" Hermione asked, suddenly timid and wrapped her arms around her middle.

"This," Ron said and pointed to her worried face and her tightly wrapped arms. "Are you afraid of me or something?"

"N-No, of course not,' she replied and dropped her arms to her sides.

"I don't want us to be like this."

"Like what?" Hermione said in a voice that he knew was supposed to be innocent, but that she knew exactly what he was talking about.

"We have a lot to sort out, but we're okay, right?"

Ron reached out and smoothed his hand over her cheek and watched her close her eyes briefly and take a deep breath. He was relieved that he could still have that same effect on her even after the day they both had.

"Yes, of course we are," she said then pulled his hand from her face and held it against her chest. "I just feel so guilty for what I did. I don't know how to act with you now. I know that sounds horrible, but I feel like you're still angry with me and I don't know how to fix it."

Ron sighed and stepped in closer, feeling her body become tense. "I was, but not anymore," he said. "Don't worry so much."

Hermione nodded and smiled up at Ron gratefully. He was once again blown away by how beautiful she was without even trying. She was looking at him with so much remorse and love that he couldn't stop himself from backing her up against the door and taking her head in his hands then crushing his lips to hers. She moaned and practically melted against him so that he had to support her around the waist to keep them standing.

"Oi!" Harry's voice sounded loudly from behind Hermione's head followed by a loud knock. Ron groaned into their kiss then pulled away from Hermione and steadied her on her feet.

Harry continued, "I heard moaning in there and I'm pretty sure that's not what Ginny meant when she said we spend time together. I might just tell her you're snogging without me… Wait! That came out wrong."

Hermione opened the door as Harry was saying his last words and crossed her arms over her chest, glaring at him. Ron stood behind her snickering into his palm.

"You really do have lousy timing, Harry," she said. "I'm starting to think you do this on purpose."

"Of course it's on purpose. We're going out, remember?" Harry said incredulously.

"Oh… that's right," Hermione said and stalked past Harry.

"What can I say?" Ron muttered and grinned smugly at Harry when Hermione was out of earshot. "I can make her forget all kinds of things."

"I'm sure you can, Ron. You're a real life Romeo," Harry said sarcastically and pushed Ron toward the steps.

Ron's smirk faded and his face wrinkled in confusion. "Who the bloody hell is Romeo?"

* * *

As they walked the streets of Muggle London Ron couldn't help but marvel at all the lights and people walking about. The buildings were massive and he seemed to be the only one impressed by them.

"There is this film I've been dying to see," Hermione said excitedly as they walked. "It's not new, it's in black and white actually… and we have to read the subtitles, but I hear it's very dramatic and-"

"Nevermind," Harry said quickly and stopped to pat Hermione's shoulder kindly. "Why don't I pick one instead? We don't want Ron to have to read while seeing his first film. It will put him off of cinemas the rest of his life."

"Thanks, Harry," Ron said gratefully.

"Fine," Hermione said grumpily as they continued to walk. "But nothing with guns, swear it Harry."

Harry laughed and said, "Promise, no guns."

"And no cartoons, either, Harry," Hermione said to the back of Harry's head as he walked ahead of them and opened the glass doors of one of the massively large buildings that was covered in lights and moving words displaying film titles and times.

Ron could practically feel Harry roll his eyes before he said, "No cartoons, got it."

It was enormous inside, filled with people standing around talking and kids running through the legs of their parents. Loud ringing and sharp noises sounded throughout the room along with fast, thumping music. Ron was in overstimulation heaven; exactly what he needed.

They walked to a wall of posters that didn't move and Hermione told him that they represented the movies that were showing at the time.

"Why don't I pick the film?" Ron asked as he stared at one of a woman in a red dress laughing.

Harry stopped to look at Hermione, and they both shrugged.

"That one looks good," Harry said staring up at the same poster as Ron.

Hermione huffed and said, "Of course you would think so. You're men."

"Thanks for noticing," Ron said and winked at her.

"No, look," Harry said, reading the poster, "'Something About Mary'. It says it's a comedy. Hermione, everything else is either for kids or has violence."

"Besides," Ron added cheekily, "you could use a laugh."

Hermione glared at Ron and stuck out her tongue making Ron and Harry laugh.

"Ugh, alright!" she said, trying to hide a smile, and stomped off toward the ticket booth.

After a hushed disagreement between the three of them about who should pay, Hermione pointed out that she was the only one carrying enough muggle money with her. Harry and Ron agreed only after she accepted that they would pay her back.

"The film doesn't start for another half hour," Hermione said after she purchased the tickets and looked at her watch.

"I'll go find us seats and you two can get the sweets and drinks," Harry said. They agreed and Ron watched as Harry grinned and jogged away from them.

"He looks happy," Hermione said as they stepped in line.

"Yeah, he does, doesn't he?"

"What did you say to him?" she asked curiously.

"Oh, I just told him to buck up and take the stick out of his arse," he said, looking straight ahead. He felt her hit his arm and pretended to rub the pain away.

"Must you always be so violent, Hermione?" He pushed her shoulder lightly, making her sway away from him and catch her footing.

"Not funny, Ron," she said and shoved him back harder, but not budging him an inch. Ron laughed as she grunted and giggled against his shoulder, still trying to uproot him. He loved that he was able to make her laugh again, the sound beating out all the loud music, talking and noise surrounding them. He felt relaxed and more like himself than he had for a long time.

"You're like a tree, you know," Hermione said breathlessly, giving up and walking ahead as the line moved.

"I've been called lots of things, Hermione, but tree is – holy Merlin's bollocks," he breathed, staring in awe at the display of different brightly colored sweets in front of him. He turned to Hermione who was taking in his reaction with great amusement.

"It's a Pick-n-Mix," Hermione explained and handed Ron a clear bag. "You fill up on anything you want and they weigh it for you at the counter."

"Anything?" Ron said, not tearing his eyes away from the wall of, what he preferred to call, his own personal paradise.

Hermione chuckled and said, "Yes, Ron, anything. Hurry and I'll go get our drinks."

She walked away, leaving him there to marvel at the choices that were before him. He saw chocolate nuts, licorice, jelly beans - that he was sure wouldn't taste like bogies -, lollies, gummi bears and so much more. He licked his lips and with great excitement started opening the small see-through doors and pouring some of each and every sweet into his bag, having to grab another one to get them all.

"Oh, my god!" Hermione exclaimed.

She was waiting for him by the counter to pay for everything, balancing three containers of drinks in a tray and almost dropped them when she saw Ron walking toward her, cradling two packed bags of sweets, almost bursting at the seams. He plopped them down onto the counter and watched as the clerk weighed them and took Hermione's money.

"You're going to get about a dozen cavities," Hermione said as they walked together into the theater room.

"Naw," Ron said, trying to open one bag with his teeth. "Wizards don't get those."

"Whatever," Hermione said. "At least wait until you're sitting down, for goodness sake."

* * *

"So what did you think?" Hermione asked Ron eagerly as they walked back outside.

"I thought it was bloody brilliant!" Ron said, chuckling as he remembered the funniest parts of the film. His first trip to the cinema was great, once he got over how large the screen was and stopped talking loudly after many shushes from people trying to watch the film, including Hermione. He had to whisper questions to her about some of the muggle things the actors were using and talking about, to which Hermione would whisper back her answers.

However there was another question he wanted to ask. "Do you reckon that would work?" he asked Harry. "When she used that bloke's stuff in her hair? We could make loads of galleons that way."

Harry burst into laughter in the middle of the sidewalk, holding his stomach. "Oh, my god. That's hilarious!"

"That is utterly disgusting," Hermione said with a wrinkled nose as she looked back and forth between Harry's laughing form and Ron who had his head back, roaring with laughter. "Oh, you are both so immature, I swear." She smacked her teeth with her tongue and started walking ahead without them.

Ron and Harry calmed down enough to walk behind her, chatting about the film. He looked at Hermione's stiff walk and grinned.

"I'm telling you, Harry," Ron said loudly. "We can even make the product ourselves and it won't cost us a sickle."

"You're right," Harry said, trying not to laugh and eyeing Hermione's back. "We're young, too. I reckon we could produce  _loads_  of product."

"Okay, that's enough!" Hermione said and whipped around to face them. Ron and Harry looked at each other with similar smirks and watched as Hermione pointed her finger at them, obviously biting the inside of her cheeks to prevent them from forming a smile. "You two are deplorable."

"Depora-what?" Ron said, looking at Harry who shrugged.

"Deplorable! Appalling. Terrible. Dreadful-"

"Alright, we're prats. Bloody hell," Ron said then reached out to tickle Hermione's sides. "But we're funny prats, yeah?"

Hermione grinned and pushed his hands away. "Yes, so funny I forgot to laugh." Then she stepped between them and turned around to loop her arms through both of theirs. "I'll walk with you only if you promise no more ejaculation humor."

Ron and Harry burst into another fit of laughter which Hermione then joined in. "This is what I get for having boys as best friends," she said, shaking her head and pulling them along.

* * *

The hour was late at the Burrow. Ron was teaching Hermione how to play Exploding Snaps while Harry and Ginny were taking a walk outside. He knew Harry was eager to get back home to her and was grateful when she accepted his offer to talk. Ron smiled when he thought of his talk with Harry, feeling good about his involvement in their making up.

His parents had gone up to bed so it was only him and Hermione in the living room. The only sounds were random cracks and pops as the cards exploded followed by Hermione crying out in surprise every time. He snickered as the last one made her jump to her feet and throw down her card in frustration.

"You rigged these, didn't you?" she accused, pointing her finger down at the table filled with smoking cards.

"Rigged? If you're calling me a cheater then I am appalled at the accusation," Ron said with his hand to his chest in mock indignation.

Hermione huffed and walked around the table to sit next to him and watched as he gathered up the cards to put them away.

"Well, I never liked that game anyway," she said haughtily. "It's all about luck. There's absolutely no skill involved."

Ron scoffed at her and sat back on the sofa to stare at her. "I'll have you know there is lots of skill involved. You just have to learn how to play without thinking."

"That makes absolutely no sense. Skill requires thinking," Hermione said, looking at Ron skeptically.

"Doesn't matter," he said and moved closer to her so that his trousers rubbed against her bare leg. "What do you want to do now?"

"I want to find a book on that atrocious game and figure it out so I can practice and beat you next time. That's what I want to do," she said and crossed her arms, moving her leg away from him.

"I've never seen a book on the subject," Ron said, moving closer again and draping his arm around the back of the couch behind her.

"Have you ever looked? I bet I can find one," Hermione said shifting her body away once more. Ron took in her flushed cheeks and her chest that was moving rapidly as she took in deep breaths.

"If anyone can, it will definitely be you," he said and pumped an imaginary fist in the air when her cheeks turned a bright shade of pink.

"Of course it will be me," she said and glanced at him. He grinned and saw her blink slowly as her eyes settled on his lips. "And when I do find it I will show you that the game is all about timing and luck. Not skills."

"Would you be willing to wager a bet?"

"I most certainly will not," Hermione said, her voice low.

Ron was so turned on that his whole body was buzzing from desire. He could also feel Hermione's heat coming off her and smell her scent as he leaned in closer. She remained still and looked straight ahead as he whispered in her ear.

"I'm so horny right now." He placed his hand on her left knee and slid it up slowly over her thigh, watching the side of her face as she closed her eyes and breathed through her nose.

"I didn't realize Exploding Snaps turned you on so much," she said huskily, and opened her eyes to glance at him quickly then turned back to stare ahead.

He chuckled and reached his hand under the hem of her shorts, caressing the soft skin of her inner thigh.

"Ron," Hermione whispered then gasped when his long fingers grazed her knickers. "We shouldn't do this down here. Harry and Ginny will be back soon." She closed her eyes once more when Ron pressed his lips to her neck and sucked lightly on her skin.

"Oh, god," she murmured and grabbed his bicep with one hand, pushing his hand from under her shorts.

"Sorry," Ron said quickly and pulled back further from her. He cursed inwardly for letting his hormones take over. He just couldn't help wanting to touch her and taste her. He could never resist her when she challenged him, even if it was about a silly game.

Hermione stood up and smoothed her clothes down before extending her hand to him. "Well? Come on then," she said gesturing impatiently for him to take her hand and follow her.

"Fuck yeah," Ron said and grabbed her hand, letting her pull him up and drag him all the way up to his room and closing the door silently.

After doing the necessary spells, Ron wanted to pick up where they left off earlier in the day so he pushed Hermione against the door, kissing her with every ounce of passion he could muster. Hermione clung to him, her hands gripping his shoulders and her legs parting, allowing Ron to step in even closer. He pressed her body flush to the wooden door and squeezed her hips through her shorts, making her moan inside his mouth.

He dragged his tongue across her neck and used his hands to undo her shorts and pushed them down to her ankles.

"Oh, god, Ron," Hermione said after throwing her head back and hitting the door. "Touch me, please."

"Not yet," Ron replied. He stepped back to work on taking off her shirt, pulling it over her head and quickly reaching around to unclasp her bra. He almost yelped in surprise when it came apart in one go and he tossed it aside.

"Very impressive," Hermione said with a dreamy grin.

"Thanks," Ron said arrogantly with a shrug.

He hooked his fingers inside her knickers and pushed them down to join her shorts. She kicked herself out of them and stood in front of him, fully nude. Ron stared openly at her flushed body, lightly tanned and shiny with sweat. The hair between her legs was dark and trim; her breasts soft looking with hard little nipples that Ron ached to touch. Her nervous jitters from when they first saw one another starkers were completely gone as she placed her hands on her narrow hips and smiled wickedly at him.

"Now you," she said and nodded at him to get on with it.

"Gladly," Ron said eagerly and proceeded to take off one piece of clothing at a time. He wanted to go slow because she was looking at him with great interest. Her lips were pursed and her fingers were drumming against her sides as she watched him strip.

He wasn't as graceful or as confident as Hermione was, but he managed to finally kick off his socks, the last piece of clothing that remained, and stood in front of her in all his glory. He saw her eyes flicker down to his swollen member. Her face turned red before she looked back up into his eyes with one brow raised. He mimicked her with his own hands on his hips as they stared at each other, both challenging and daring the other to make the first move.

Hermione slowly licked her lips and Ron felt his erection spasm. He groaned and bit his lip, fighting to hold on and not touch her, even though he couldn't think of a reason not to.

He was just about to give in when Hermione suddenly launched herself at him, climbing up his body and wrapping her legs around his waist. She kissed him with no hesitation, her lips and tongue moving in and around his mouth, drinking him in. Ron grunted at the force of her mount and snapped his arms around her torso, reciprocating the kiss with just as much enthusiasm. He spun them around until he could feel his dresser against his knees and sat her on top of it, sweeping whatever contents he had on top crashing to the floor.

"I couldn't wait," Hermione gasped as Ron grabbed hold of her breasts and squeezed her nipples. Her lips smacked kisses along his neck and face as she continued to talk. "You're so gorgeous, Ron. Your skin feels so good."

Her hands smoothed over his back and grabbed a handful of his bum, making him drop his head and take her right nipple into his mouth, sucking hard on it. She cried out and reached around to his chest and pulled his nipples hard.

"Fuuuck, Hermione," Ron groaned and pulled her in so that he could feel her skin on his, their sweat making them slide against one another, their hard nipples passing over one another. She pulled at his hair when the tip of his erection slid up inside of her without warning. Hermione let out a long groan and pressed her forehead on his. They both froze, panting into each other's face and licking their lips.

"Mmmm. Ron, that feels brilliant," Hermione said roughly and pushed her face onto his and bit his bottom lip hard.

"Holy shit," Ron said when she let go, his heart pounding rapidly inside his chest and his lip burning from her teeth being sunk into it. "Can I do that to you?" he asked and felt her nod.

He moved his hips so that he was deeper inside of her and they sucked in a breath, their bodies tense. He slowly took her lip between his teeth and opened his eyes to see her up close. She had her eyes open, looking down at their mouths and making small whimpering noises. He bit down hard, just as she did to him. She gasped sharply and he let go, watching as she touched the inside of her lip gingerly and seeing red on her finger.

"Merlin, I'm so sorry," Ron said, horrified. His heart dropped at the sight of her blood and knowing that he caused it. "I didn't mean to do it that hard, honest."

He tried to pull out of her, but couldn't because her legs were still wrapped tightly around his waist, not letting him go.

"It's okay, Ron," Hermione said and sucked on her finger. His breath stopped as she grabbed his face and pulled him closer. "That was so hot," she whispered and ran her tongue across the inside of her lip.

"You – You liked it?" he asked in awe.

Hermione nodded and pulled him in for another kiss. He could taste her coppery blood inside his mouth. She was gasping and whimpering each time his tongue would sweep over the tender area, but she wouldn't let him pull away when he tried.

He wasn't sure what had come over her, but he could feel himself getting turned on as she continued to kiss him. All the emotions from the day must have caught up to her and he couldn't deny that he was feeling it too. All the anger and frustration that he felt that morning didn't entirely leave him and he felt some of it coming back as she ground her hips against his.

The shag they had in the woods was quick and desperate; a need they had to fulfill and it was over quickly. He didn't have time to process everything at the time and was caught up in the moment. However, now that he had time all day to think about what she did and how he felt about it, the fact that she was in his arms, hungry for him and giving herself to him so eagerly, only served to bring back some of those feelings that he tried to push down. He wanted her so badly and loved her so much that he was willing to do whatever it took to forgive and help her. That thought made him more furious as she bucked her hips again and moaned against his ear.

He thought about stopping and addressing these feelings, but her warmth was tight against his hardness, wrapping and pulsing around him and it felt so bloody good. He thrust up inside her and she gasped loudly, her nails raking across his back. He slid his hands up to her face and held her cheeks in his hands, staring at her heatedly.

"Do it, Ron," she said forcefully as tears formed in her eyes.

He kissed her, not with passion, but without regard to her swollen lip or her tongue that he sucked on mercilessly. His temper rose and he fought to keep it at bay when she grabbed at his wrists near her face and dug her nails into his palms. He continued to kiss her deeply since she wasn't pulling away; taking everything he gave her as he rocked his hips and pounded into her recklessly.

He felt animalistic and wild as he dropped his hands to her hips and pulled her along with him in a rapid pace. Her arms reached high above her and found the edge of the mirror, holding on and crying out with each thrust.

"Fucking fuck," Ron grunted and stared at Hermione who was watching him intently. "Do you like that?"

She nodded quickly and said, "Oh, god, yes. Don't stop."

He anchored himself with on hand on the dresser and angled his body with the other hand on her bum, pinching her skin hard between his fingers. She screamed out and her body jumped. She pulled herself up using the mirror, away from the pain and the insistent thrusting of Ron's hips.

"How about that?" he asked and glared at her when she dropped one hand and started kneading her breast and licking her lips as a response.

He couldn't describe the feeling that coursed through his body at that moment. He felt a rage inside of him, but it was being confused with lust and tenderness, and all consuming love. The fact that Hermione was enjoying it was baffling his mind to no end. He knew he was being rough with her, but it felt too good to stop now. He told himself that the second she gave him any indication that she wanted to stop he would, without pause.

"You okay?" he asked because he had to make sure since he was finally coming to his senses.

"Yes, Ron," she groaned. "I said don't stop. Fuck me, please."

His eyes widened, his brain latching onto the swear word that came from her and the pleading in her voice. He then gave into every feeling, confused or not, and wrenched her away from the mirror, hugging her close. The dresser was knocking loudly against the wall, the mirror rocking back and forth dangerously as he pulled her legs higher on his waist and plunged into her with renewed fervor.

"Oh, god. Oh, yes. Keep going," Hermione moaned, her head trapped between Ron's neck and shoulder, his hand deep inside her tangled hair, holding the back of her head against him. His other hand was wrapped around her waist tight, the muscles flexing and strained from holding her in place.

Ron swore loudly, screaming obscenities into the air over her shoulder as he felt his release building up inside of him, threatening to spill over, waiting for Hermione to come undone. Suddenly he felt her body go rigid in his arms and her fingernails scraped his lower back when he felt her orgasm tighten around his member, throbbing and helping to pull his own orgasm out of his body and into hers.

Ron braced his tired legs against the dresser and Hermione's legs went slack, hanging on either side of his hips. However, they clung to one another long after they were finished, still connected below, but not wanting to separate. He heard her sniff and felt something wet fall onto his shoulder. Instead of pulling back and looking at her, he stood up taller and squeezed her tighter, his emotions finally bursting through a wall. He thought about Fred and how much he missed him. He thought about Harry and Ginny and his whole family and how much they're suffering. He thought about the state his world was in, the words he said to Harry coming back to him with full force.

And he cried, sobbing into her hair, letting out all of the anger and bitterness, the love and affection he felt towards her. He allowed himself to be held even though he thought he might have hurt her through their lovemaking. She shushed him and whispered into his skin that everything was okay and that she loved him, her voice quivering with her own weeping.

"I'm sorry. I love you," he whispered as his body shook against hers and new tears fell, soaking her shoulder and hair once more.

Hermione only nodded and stroked his hair lovingly with her fingers, rocking their sweat covered bodies together in a slow, calming rhythm.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

"Stupefy!"

"Protego!"

"Expelliarmus!"

A moment too late with the counter spell, Hermione felt her wand being yanked out of her outstretched hand and watched as it sailed gracefully into Harry's. She growled in frustration and stomped her foot on the grass, well aware of the fact that she looked and sounded like a small child with a temper.

"Thanks," Hermione muttered through her teeth after Harry walked up and handed her wand over with a raised brow. She snatched it from him a bit too harshly and said, "Let's go again. I'll get it this time." She squared her shoulders and glared straight ahead in an attempt to focus harder on the task at hand.

Hermione was supposed to be practicing defensive and offensive spells with Harry, something they usually did while Ron and Ginny were working with George at the shop. However, even with it being a sunny and mild Friday afternoon, Hermione was finding it rather difficult to concentrate on anything but the events of yesterday and what happened between her and Ron in his bedroom last night.

That feral look in Ron's eyes as he slammed into her on top of his dresser refused to leave her head; it was heated passion that drove both of them to the brink of inflicting actual pain, and which gave her goose pimples just thinking about it. Her lip still felt bruised from Ron's eager bite, but, for reasons that Hermione would rather not confess, she refused to heal it. Making sure Harry wasn't looking, Hermione ran her tongue over the tender tissue inside her mouth and cringed, but at the same time felt better for it; the sting of his bite served as a type of deserving and twisted punishment - in her mind - for her massive mistake.

After releasing himself inside of her in such a wild manner, it was as if he couldn't hold anything else back; sobbing uncontrollably on her shoulder, Ron showed her a side of him she'd never seen before. He was vulnerable, open and raw with emotion. It had shaken both of them to the core and Hermione didn't know what else to do but spend most of the night whispering reassurances and affirmations of her love for him. As she thought back on the night she couldn't recall him saying much in response; only nodding as more tears fell until she watched him fall asleep.

The next morning Ron had left for work before Hermione woke up to an empty bed. Not knowing exactly where his frame of mind was at the moment was as a huge distraction for Hermione, thus preventing her from performing the simplest of spells that she could no doubt mutter in her sleep.

"Come on, Harry," Hermione said impatiently as she rolled her eyes and stomped her foot again when Harry didn't resume his position across the garden to carry on with their dueling. "I'm supposed to be helping you, remember?"

"Right," Harry said slowly and crossed his arms over his chest, wand tapping on his shoulder. "Hermione, if you don't mind me asking – and please keep in mind that I'm risking my arse being hexed bringing this up - but are you sure I can't help you? I mean, does this foul mood of yours have anything to do with that row you and Ron had yesterday?"

"What are you on about? I'm fine," Hermione said swiftly and tucked her hair behind her ears. Feeling that this was the end of their dueling session and not up for any more failure before lunch, she pocketed her wand.

Harry sighed with relief when he saw she was wandless and said, "Ron told me about you having a problem with the whole Auror thing. You can talk to me about it, too, you know… if you want. "

Hermione groaned as the weight of her lie and the anxiety that she has been battling for months climbed onto her back to join her mounting frustration and fatigue from not enough sleep.

"I can't believe Ron told you that," she said with a barely contained sigh of frustration. "I'm going to-"

"Don't," Harry said with his hands out. "He told me not to say anything, but I can tell there's more going on, Hermione. I just want to help."

"What else did he tell you?" Hermione asked, ignoring Harry's concern. She needed to know what Harry knew before she gave into the urge to spill her guts.

Harry looked taken aback by her question. "Er… just what I said. That you hate him and me becoming Aurors. Why? Is there something more?"

Hermione relaxed and pulled her heavy, sweaty hair off her neck and into a sloppy ponytail. "No, nothing else. Look, is it alright if we talk later? I'm a bit tired from falling on my bum all morning." She tried on a smile to quell Harry's doubts, but could tell by his unchanged expression that she wasn't fooling him at all.

Hermione was tired, but most of all she was emotionally drained. The last thing she wanted to do was talk about how anxious, incompetent and uncharacteristically weepy she has been lately. It was bad enough that Ron was privy to this pathetic side of her. No matter how much she didn't want to think about it, she couldn't help but feel that their relationship was still hanging by a very shaky thread.

Hermione wanted to believe that - in Harry's eyes at least - she was still that strong, confident, clever girl who could get him and Ron out of anything. She needed so desperately to see herself that way whenever Harry looked at her. She couldn't tolerate it if Harry knew that she had lied to Ron and everyone else, and was also seeking therapy. As much as she wanted to confide in him, and also suggest that he might want to do the same, she just couldn't bring herself to do it. Not now.

"Yeah, we'll talk later," Harry said with an edge of disappointment in his voice and a shrug of his shoulders. "So, you said you were hungry? We should-"

As if on cue an owl came barreling through the sky and hit Harry on the head with its rolled message.

"What the bloody- oh it's from Ginny," Harry said as he picked up the parchment from the grass. Hermione waited until the owl was safe outside the wards before looking back at Harry, who was grinning down at the letter.

"What's going on?" Hermione said.

"She wants us to meet her and Ron for lunch at The Leaky Cauldron. Says she got off and wants to do school shopping so don't forget our lists," he read and looked up at Hermione over his glasses. "You up for it?"

"Er, yeah… sure," she said and looked down at her watch. "I'll just… grab my bag, and our lists, and meet you out here, yeah?" After Harry gave her a nod she raced inside the house, past Mrs. Weasley in the kitchen and up the stairs into Ron's room. Closing the door behind her, she slumped against it to catch her breath.

_It doesn't have to be awkward. No matter what he says or does, just put on a happy face for Harry and Ginny. He may still be upset with me, but after last night maybe…_

Hermione honestly had no idea what to expect when she saw Ron next. The previous day was so strange with its ups and downs; the rollercoaster of emotions had rendered her confused as to the state of their relationship. She once again tongued the inside of her lip and groaned, waiting for the stinging to subside before she pushed herself up to stand.

At least she could say for a fact that they still had a relationship. Hermione hung onto that positive thought, repeating it in her head as she looked at herself in the mirror, studying her reflection. Her hair was a mess and her clothes were grass stained. She certainly wasn't lying when she said she had landed on her bum more than a few times, thanks to Harry's excellent dueling and her bewildered state.

Not wanting to waste more time, she searched the room and found a cleaner looking pink blouse that was shoved between Ron's mattress and a flowery soft skirt she noticed peeking out from under the dresser. She didn't bother to ask herself why so many of her clothes had found their way into precarious places around his room, or how she had slowly succumbed to Ron's messy habits. She allowed a small smile on her face and made a mental note to make him clean his room with her that very night.

After attacking her hair, Hermione relented to her curls' stubbornness to stay frizzy, and snatched up her bag and Ron's list of the supplies from his desk. She made a stop in Ginny's room for Harry's and Ginny's lists, and headed down the stairs.

Hermione walked through the kitchen and noticed Mrs. Weasley was no longer there before leaving the house and locking the door behind her.

"You look nice," Harry said as she handed over his and Ginny's lists.

"My other clothes were filthy," Hermione said with a wave of her hand. "Do you think I should find Mrs. Weasley? Tell her where we're going?"

Harry folded the parchments and tucked them inside his back pocket along with his wand. "She stuck her head out to tell me she was going to rest and I told her we were meeting them. Come on, let's go before Ron eats everything and there's nothing left for us!"

"You just want to hurry to see Ginny, don't you?" Hermione teased after she felt the surface of the wards around the Burrow shimmer through her body as she came out the other side.

Harry laughed and said, "You always were a perceptive one."

"Aren't you worried about people gawking at you? We don't have to go. We can send Ginny an owl with the lists and-"

"No, Hermione," Harry said gently. "I need to get out more. Let some of the mystery wear off, you know?"

Hermione regarded him with a look of respect and admiration. "Yes, you're right," she said, shaking her head. "I shouldn't be encouraging you to stay away. It will be better to have your face out there instead of people making up stories and having to guess what's going on."

"Exactly," he said and took a deep breath. Hermione could tell he was determined, but still nervous about going to such a busy wizarding area where everyone knew of him.

And here she was worrying about one boy.

"It will be great," Hermione said and smiled brightly at him. "You're with your best friends and I'm sure Ginny will hex anyone who comes near you."

Harry grimaced and said, "Shit, you're right. She would do that, wouldn't she? We better cancel."

Hermione laughed, already in better spirits. "We are not, Harry! You leave first and I'll follow, yeah?"

He grinned at her and took another deep breath before disapparating with an annoyingly loud crack. Hermione rolled her back and adjusted her blouse, unbuttoning the first few buttons to show some extra skin.

_No harm in using what I've got to even things out a bit._

With that last thought her nerves won out as she disapparated with a crack loud enough to give Harry's a run for its money.

XXXX

The beautiful weather back at the Burrow had followed them to Diagon Alley. However, the tranquility and space that the Burrow offered on a daily basis were severely lacking as Hermione looked around the crowded and narrow path; the many open shops were packed with customers. However, it felt a bit more crowded than usual. She figured there would be less students returning to Hogwarts after the final battle on the school grounds. Although she shouldn't have been worried, an unsettling thought itched in the back of her mind as she noticed most of the population was adults, and not school age witches and wizards.

Before she could think more on that odd fact, she felt a tap on her shoulder and whipped around, her hand instinctively going for her wand before she found herself looking into the green eyes of her best friend, Harry Potter.

"God, Harry, you startled me," she said, fixing her bag on her shoulder. People were shoving their way around them, hurrying in opposite directions, as she and Harry stood idle in the middle of the cobble stoned path.

"I was calling you, but then people started to notice so…" he said with a nervous laugh.

"Nevermind," Hermione said distractedly and shoved him over to stand under the sign for The Leaky Cauldron.

Craning her neck and peering over Harry's shoulder, she said, "Have you seen Ron and Ginny?"

"Who's in a hurry now?" Harry nudged her with his elbow and laughed.

Hermione glanced at him and blinked rapidly. "No hurry, just… nervous."

Before Harry could reply Hermione felt two hands wrap around her waist and a large warm body press up against her back and bum. She jumped what felt like a mile into the air and made a loud squealing noise. She saw Harry smile grow wider when Ginny came into view, her vibrant red hair pulled to the side in a long plait. She was wearing a bright orange WWW t-shirt and jeans that looked much like the worn out, stained ones Hermione had chucked on Ron's floor just moments ago.

"Miss me?" Ron's breath tickled the hairs on Hermione's neck before she felt his lips press into her skin. She felt herself relaxing into his arms as shivers ran through her legs and up to her face. When she turned his arms didn't let her go, trapping her against his body until she was able to look up into his smiling face. He looked so handsome in his short sleeved blue and white plaid shirt, casually thrown over a shirt identical to Ginny's. Ron didn't look upset in the slightest as he continued to grin down at her. Actually, he looked to be in a very good mood and for that Hermione was much relieved. She felt like she had worked herself up for nothing.

"What's wrong?"

She shook her head and smiled back. "You just startled me is all."

"Constant vigilance and all that."

"Yes, indeed. Is this something new George is making you try out?" Hermione asked, tracing the letters across his chest with one finger.

"Do you like it? I picked the color," Ron said, beaming.

"Yes, it was all Ron's idea to make us look like bloody pumpkins," Ginny said from behind Hermione. She turned around and saw Ginny pluck her shirt away from her stomach and scowl down at the large black W's.

"Of course he picked this color," Harry said snickering. "Hasn't anyone told you red and orange don't go together, Ron?"

"Fuck off, Harry," Ron said with a smirk. "I don't see you designing dress robes for Madame Malkins, do I?"

"Oh, forget it," Ginny groaned and pulled open the door. "These two will go on like this for days if we let them," she said to Hermione. Hermione laughed and went to follow Ginny and Harry inside when Ron suddenly pulled her back by her arm.

"Hold on a second," he said quietly and moved them to a more secluded spot in an alley next to the building. Not that anywhere in Diagon Alley was private, but everyone was blocked from Hermione's view when Ron stepped in front of her.

"What is it, Ron?" Hermione asked nervously. She was not up for a row or a long winded talk about feelings and mistrust. Normally, she was all for hashing things out, but she felt like they've done so much talking lately that she was ready to tape her own mouth shut.

"Nothing," he said with a shrug. Hermione could see something mischievous in his eyes and couldn't help but smile at his lopsided grin, her knees automatically buckling against her will.

"So, let me get this straight," she said and leaned her back against the brick wall. "You pulled me away and are attempting to shield us from a mass of people, to just stand here in front of me and say 'nothing'? You are such a charmer."

Then he reached out and placed is hand on the wall next to her head and leaned in close, using his other hand to tuck a stray curl behind her ear. His grin widened and, for reasons that her heart understood before her head, she trembled under his gaze and touch.

"I just wanted a proper hello," he said and licked his lips. "You looked so beautiful this morning that I didn't want to wake you. I've regretted it all day."

Hermione made a moaning, throat clearing sound that made Ron chuckle. Whatever qualms Hermione had about Ron's feelings towards her must have been wrong. Either that or he suddenly became an expert at hiding his feelings, which Hermione seriously doubted.

"You did?" she said lamely.

"Yeah, I did," Ron said and his face turned serious. "I know you think I'm still upset, and honestly, I'm trying not to be. Everything that happened yesterday and what you said last night… I just-"

"We don't have to talk about this now."

"I know," Ron said quickly and used his free hand to rub his neck. "I feel like such a prat for crying all over you like that. I just wanted to say thanks and that I love you, too, alright?"

Hermione swallowed thickly and nodded; her heart racing and her hands shaking against her thighs. She should feel grateful, ecstatic even, at those wonderful words. Instead she felt undeserving and her stomach was in knots.

She closed her eyes as Ron leaned in to kiss her, his lips soft and warm as he pressed them gently on hers. He pulled away after a second, only to come back in again, his mouth more demanding and full of purpose, eager to show her instead of telling her how he felt. Hermione almost wished he hadn't because the suction of his lips on her bottom one made her hiss and gasp in pain.

Ron pulled back abruptly and said, "What the hell was that?"

"I… it's…" Hermione said, touching a finger to her lip, "from last night. It's nothing. It'll heal."

Ron's face hardened and he stepped in closer once again, moving her finger away from her face. "Let me see it."

Hermione clasped her hands together as she let him pull her lip down, a low groan escaping her throat as she felt the pain again. She stared at Ron without blinking; his brow knitted and his eyes flicked up to hers before letting go. He looked angry, but she wasn't sure if it was directed at her, or at himself.

"Why didn't you heal it on the inside? It's a simple spell, Hermione. I know you know it."

"I don't- I don't know. I just-"

"Here, I'll do it, yeah? Hold still," Ron said shakily as he pulled out his wand.

"No, it's fine, really!" Hermione pushed his hand and wand aside. She didn't know why she was protesting so much. Ron only wanted to help her, but for some reason the thought of the bite and its pain being gone made her panic.

"What the fuck, Hermione?"

"I told you, it doesn't hurt that much, Ron," she said angrily. "Just leave it. I don't need magic."

"The hell you don't," Ron said loudly. He lowered his voice to a whisper and leaned in closer to say, "I did that to you, Hermione! You know I can't stand the thought of you hurting because of me."

"I wanted you to do it, remember?" Hermione stepped off of the wall and glared up at him. "And further more…" She paused as she tried to get a grip on what they were rowing about. Demanding to keep him from healing what he saw as evidence of his ability to cause her harm suddenly felt completely absurd.

_Oh, my god. What is happening to me? What am I doing?_

"Why the hell would you stay in pain when you don't have to?" he said slowly, taking advantage of Hermione's hesitance. "That's fucking mental, Hermione, you do realize that?"

Hermione's moment of self clarification diminished as Ron's words and accusing tone of voice cut through her like a knife.

"What did you just say?" she said in a choked whisper, shocked that he had just voiced what she was already thinking. Her head started to pound as she stared up at him, her bruised lip quivering against her teeth.

Ron's eyes opened wide and he looked to be in his own state of bewilderment, but his red face and heavy breathing also told her he was still disturbed. "I-" he swallowed and pushed his hands into his hair, "I shouldn't have said it like that, but… what the fuck, Hermione. You didn't-"

"What's going on here?"

Ron quickly stepped away Hermione and they both turned to see Harry step forward from Ginny's side. The alley that they were standing in wasn't as crowded as the main road, but there were still people milling about, glancing in at them.

"Shit," Ron said, glancing at the growing crowd of people staring at them then back at Harry. "We'll be right in. Give us a minute, will you?"

"Are you alright?" Harry ignored Ron and directed the question at Hermione.

"She's fine," Ron said through his teeth as he stepped in front of her with his arms crossed. "I said we'll be in, Harry. Bugger off."

"Oi!" Ginny called from behind Harry.

"Ron," Hermione said warningly and put a hand on his arm. He shrugged it off, still glaring at Harry. Hermione glanced at Ginny who was about to say something else, but Hermione stopped her, shaking her head. Instead, Ginny took out her wand and cast a silencing charm around them. People walking through Diagon Alley were still pointing and staring, but at least they could no longer hear what was going on.

A flash of light bounced off the walls and they all whipped around at the same time, taking their wands out and pointing, a spell on the tip of their tongues.

"Shit, just a photographer," Ginny muttered as they all put their wands away. "Fuck off!" she shouted, despite the fact that she had just put up the silencing charm herself, thus making her demand ineffective.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Harry asked Ron as if they weren't interrupted, and not perturbed by the possibility their picture may end up in the paper the next day.

Ron rolled his eyes and leaned forward from the waist, a move that was an obvious jab against Harry's height. "Seriously, Harry… stay out of it. This is between me and Hermione, yeah?"

Hermione felt sick to her stomach watching her two best friends facing off against each other, especially knowing that it was her fault, once again causing trouble. She stepped in front of Ron and gave Harry a pleading look.

"Harry, we were just talking. We'll meet you inside. Please."

Harry glanced over at Ron, his gaze steely.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, come on, Harry," Ginny said when he didn't reply, and pulled him by the arm. "Let them work it out."

"Thanks Ginny, always knew you were good for something," Ron called out as Harry was finally backing away. However, his remark made Harry stop and Ginny skid to a halt.

"Ron!" Hermione turned around and gave him a disapproving look. "That was very rude."

Ginny stalked up to Ron and pushed him hard in the chest. "You have a lot of fucking nerve, you know that?"

"Sorry! Fucking hell," Ron said then threw his hands up in the air, turning his attention to Hermione. "But this is none of their business." He waved his hand at Harry and Ginny.

As if to add to the tension, out of nowhere, drops of water started to hit her arms and eyelids. She looked up and the previously beautiful and sunny day was smothered by dark rain clouds. With the sun no longer in view, the drops– now coming down at a steadier, but slow pace – on her bare skin were cool and made her shiver. Only Ginny seemed to notice as the girls exchanged confused looks. It was strange to have rain so suddenly on such a nice day, but even more so when Hermione could have sworn there was an enchantment over Diagon Alley, preventing such an occurrence. She must have read it somewhere, but rationalized that perhaps she was mistaken.

Besides, the scene taking place at the moment prevented her from thinking on the weather any further.

"The fuck it isn't," Harry said, ignoring the rain, and walking forward again until he had to look up at Ron's long freckled nose. "Hermione is my friend, too, in case you've forgotten. You think I don't notice the way she's on edge all the time and you're even more of a git than usual? If you've-"

"Right. Because it's always my fault, isn't it, Harry?" Ron shouted and towered over Harry. "Hermione's upset, so Ron must've fucked things up! It's bloody raining," he raised his arms dramatically to emphasize his point, "so it must be Ron acting like a fucking arse yet again!"

"Can you all just stop it?" Hermione cried, her voice somewhat muffled by the sound of rain pattering on the ground.

"Harry, let's go," Ginny said, her words low and deliberate. If Hermione was Harry she would have left immediately after hearing Ginny's icy tone. But Harry just looked to side and spoke to her and Hermione without fully turning around.

"Ginny, Hermione, can you leave us alone for a bit?"

"I don't think-"

"No," Ron said and stepped around Harry to walk up to Hermione. His hair was dark with water, plastered to his forehead and temples, and his plaid shirt was clinging to his now brown looking WWW t-shirt. Still, he ignored it and said vehemently, "We still need to talk, Hermione. I'm sorry for saying that earlier, but there's something going on you're not telling me."

Hermione took a deep breath through her nose and glared up at him. She could understand him being upset with her given everything that was going on between them, but he was taking it out on his sister and best mate. This was not a side to Ron that Hermione wanted to witness any longer.

"I- I don't think it's best that we talk right now. Just… set things right with Harry then meet us inside." Before he could reply she turned on her heel and said, "Come on, Ginny. Let the boys have a bollocks contest and see which one comes out with his still intact."

She heard Ginny snicker and say, "Sounds good to me. Oh, and Harry, Ron's left one is the most sensitive. I've kicked there enough times to know."

XX

Hermione yanked open the door of The Leaky Cauldron and stepped inside, Ginny right behind her. The pub was filled with people waiting out the rain. None of them seemed as perplexed as Hermione did about the weather, so she dismissed it from her mind and mercifully found an empty booth in the very back, drying herself with her wand. Her mind was outside with Ron and Harry, but she felt she made the right decision to leave them alone. It was better for everyone that they split up rather than adding to each other's escalating tempers.

Ginny plopped down across from Hermione with a frustrated sigh. She didn't bother drying herself, only smoothing her wet hair back from her face before she sat up and said, "What were you and Ron talking about out there? I have to admit it did look rather heated. And not in a good way."

Hermione waited for the waitress to take their orders and walk away before turning her attention back to Ginny.

"We're having some issues, but they're mostly my fault. Ron is just upset," Hermione said as she looked down at her hands on top of the table. She could hear her name being murmured throughout the room and she immediately worked to tune it out.

"I hardly believe that," Ginny snorted. "He's a right pain in the arse, Hermione. I love him because he's my brother, but I will never understand why you do."

Hermione looked up and resentment filled her as she watched Ginny tug on her plait, her elbows on the table as she chuckled at Hermione. She fixed her with a glare as her hands gripped the edge of the table.

"You really shouldn't say that, Ginny," Hermione said defensively. "If you knew your brother at all you would know that he is brave and loyal, and actually very far from a pain in the arse."

Ginny's grin faded and her mouth formed an O as she looked at Hermione almost in shock.

"I- I know that," Ginny stuttered. Her eyes glanced around the pub quickly before looking back at Hermione. She then rolled her eyes and said, "I was just taking the piss, Hermione. Calm your tits."

"Oh, for goodness sake, Ginny, do you have to sound like your brothers all the time?" Hermione meant it as a reprimand, but instantly saw that Ginny took it as a compliment.

"I have no choice, don't I?" Ginny said, her smug grin returning. "Besides, Harry doesn't mind so I reckon I'll keep my potty mouth, thank you very much."

Hermione sat back and crossed her arms, thoroughly annoyed. "I had hoped that my influence would have rubbed off on you by now. Harry's at least."

Ginny laughed heartily and said, "Harry? Obviously he's a bit different with me than he is with you and Ron."

"I really don't want to know what that look was about," Hermione said shaking her head at Ginny's wiggling eyebrows. She tried to remain offended on behalf of Ron and herself, but she was finding it difficult when Ginny's infectious energy was trying to grab hold of her. The waitress had also returned with their food and the girls eyed their plates hungrily.

"You really need to lighten up, Hermione," Ginny said then took a bite of her sandwich. After swallowing her food, she pointed a chip at Hermione and continued, "Remember what I said about those wrinkles."

Hermione couldn't help but smile at Ginny, momentarily forgetting to worry about what Ron and Harry were up to.

"I wonder what's keep Harry and Ron?" Ginny said, turning around in the booth to peer towards the door. "And why are there so many bloody people? It's not even a holiday."

Hermione's mind clicked at Ginny's first question about Ron and Harry and that odd feeling she had earlier crept to the forefront of her brain at her last words.

"I was thinking the same thing," Hermione replied. "On both counts." She watched Ginny turn fully around in her seat, kneeling in the booth to get a better view of the door.

"I can't see a bloody thing," Ginny said, craning her neck. She then yelled very loudly to the crowd, "Oi! You lot, move it!"

Hermione ducked her head into her palm. She wanted to tell Ginny that she was the one being a right pain in the arse at that moment. Several people turned to look at Ginny, but not one told her to bugger off or shut it.

"Ginny, can you get down from there? Let's just go outside and get them," Hermione hissed as she stood up, her lunch forgotten. As she looked around the room she noticed right away how crowded it actually was, more so now than when they first walked in. She understood why Ginny felt the need to shout at them.

There had to be about two dozen witches and wizards standing around talking with one another. Even more filled up the booths, tables and the bar. However, it wasn't just the amount of people present that made Hermione's neck hairs tingle or what caused her and Ginny to share an almost startling glance at one another.

It was the fact that, the same as Hermione had noticed outside, these people were also all adults. Not just that, but the way in which they carried themselves was off; they were all dressed casually in robes, some in muggle clothing, but they also had a very false look about them; almost as if the conversations they were engaged in were being staged by very poorly talented actors. The group of witches by the door kept peering out the window, their smiles plastered on their faces.

And every once in a while she caught more than a few staring at her, only to look away quickly when she turned her head towards them.

Ginny finally stepped out of the booth and quickly moved to stand next to Hermione, facing the crowd that blocked their way to the door.

"Hermione," Ginny said out the side of her mouth, "what the hell is going on right now?"

"Take out my wand," Hermione whispered as she reached behind Ginny and placed her hand on her bum.

"Hermione, I only think of you like a sister, you know that right?" Ginny said with a nervous laugh as she continued to eye the strangers who were now openly staring at them.

"It's in my back pocket, just like yours," Hermione muttered. "Reach around and take it out slowly. Don't make it obvious."

"I hope you know what you're doing," Ginny hissed.

With her heart thumping out of her chest, Hermione felt up Ginny's back and curled her fingers around the wand protruding from Ginny's back pocket. She felt Ginny do the same as they extracted each other's wand, just as Hermione had instructed. Their hands met between their sides and Hermione held her breath as they switched wands, sighing with relief when the transfer went off without a hitch.

Her fingers wrapped around the familiar etchings and width of her own wand, but this did nothing to relax Hermione. She swallowed and glanced at Ginny's profile. The younger, yet taller girl, Ron's sister, and her best girl friend, looked determined yet frightened out of her mind.

Hermione wasn't sure exactly what was going on, or if she was dreaming this scenario, but her first thought was to get Ginny out safely. Her second thought was to get to Ron and Harry and warn them that something, if anything, was askew and they needed to get to the Burrow, fast. Then she thought of George just a few shops away and what might happen to him. Plans formed and changed inside her head as she tried to grasp onto any number of spells she might be forced to use. Then she remembered her appallingly disappointing morning and the many times she fell on her bum when she couldn't defend herself against Harry, someone she knew would never hurt her.

Looking around the room again, Hermione spotted their nervous looking waitress, standing by the bar and eyeing a group of four dodgy looking wizards sitting at the counter, all turned around in their stools and openly staring at Hermione and Ginny.

"Either my wet t-shirt is getting a lot of attention or these people are looking at us for an entirely different reason," Ginny muttered. She stepped forward and turned to face Hermione, her wand in front of her, blocking it from view. Hermione noticed several of the strangers sitting in the booths turn around to stare as Ginny moved.

"Do you think…" Ginny leaned in and whispered in Hermione's ear, "Deatheaters?"

When they had first walked into the pub the place was filled with loud talking and sounds of people moving about. After Ginny just uttered that last word, the room became eerily silent; the only sounds echoing throughout were heavy raindrops slamming on the windows and door, and strong winds sending debris flying outside as people ran with their cloaks high over their heads, or else disapparating to get away from the sudden storm.

A chill ran through Hermione's spine and her heart rate quickened. She gripped her wand as tightly as she could behind her back, not wanting to let it slip out of her sweaty palm.

Hermione met Ginny's eyes and nodded once, her expression grim. She couldn't believe it. They had walked right into a trap. She felt something was amiss the moment she apparated into Diagon Alley, yet with every clue she ignored the nagging feeling in the back of her mind, dismissing and rationalizing every instance that didn't seem right and out of place.

Her thoughts turned to Ron and it was as if someone had reached inside her chest and twisted her organs around, winding them up until they were so tight; ready to snap at the most shallowest of breaths. She fought to keep the images of Ron and Harry wet and cold in the alley, dead on the ground, out of her mind. She squeezed her eyes shut and forced herself to stay in the present, with Ginny. That was her first priority. Get her and Ginny out. She had to believe that Ron and Harry were more than capable of handling themselves should the situation turn ugly and dangerous. She had to believe that they would be safe in order for her to focus.

"Hermione, I'm starting to really worry about Ron and Harry," Ginny said and glanced over her shoulder. "They should have been here by now."

Both girls stiffened when the four blokes sitting on the stools, all tall with gloomy expressions, casually stood up from their seats, not advancing, but looked to be waiting for something.

Before Hermione could say another word or raise her wand, her attention was abruptly taken away from the brooding men and back to Ginny, both of them grabbing onto the other's arm as an earsplitting screech followed by a thunderous explosion from outside The Leaky Cauldron shook against the building. Without having to guess, Hermione could tell that the blast had come from the direction of the alley in which they had left Ron and Harry, in the pouring rain.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now, onto this very short chapter… *steps to the side to avoid the tomatoes.*
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. At least that's what my therapist keeps telling me.

With rain sticking his hair to his forehead and falling into his eyes, Ron stood in the alleyway next to the Leaky Cauldron, staring after Hermione who had just walked away from him in a huff of wet curls and a sour expression.

He contemplated either staying to hear Harry out or running after Hermione, despite her wishes. Ron didn't want to upset her further, but he also didn't want to stay behind in the rain, rowing with Harry, either.

Ron could hear Harry's muffled voice behind him, but his mind was now focused on the peculiar rain that – in his most recent memory – never touched Diagon Alley, and also on three men standing at the end of the alley who didn't seem at all perturbed by it, but were openly staring at Ron and Harry, not with curiosity, but with a glowering look that put Ron on edge instantly. Not even Harry or his soaked clothing and shivering hands could seek his attention, until he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Ron, are you even listening to me?"

He jumped with his wand tight in his fist.

"Bloody hell, Harry," Ron said, wiping his face of water and shaking out his hair.

"You're soaked," Harry said and stood in front of him, blocking Ron's view of the strange men. He then cast a shield over them to protect them from the rain.

"Cheers," Ron said. Harry's interruption and the lack of rain were now making him shiver even more.

"I thought it never rained here."

"It doesn't," Ron said and quickly dried himself with his wand. He looked back over Harry's shoulder towards the end of the alleyway, but the brooding wizards must have cleared out as the space was now empty. Ron wanted to believe that they simply decided to join their mates inside the pub to get out of the rain and have a pint, but that thought only worried him more since Hermione and Ginny were also inside. A crawling sensation started in the back of his neck and he moved to rub it out with his hand.

"Look," Harry said. "I don't want to row with you. I'm worried about Hermione; you can understand that, right?"

Shifting his focus to Harry, Ron sighed and said, "You and me both. But you have to trust me, Harry. I wouldn't hurt her and it's doing my head in that you think I would."

"I don't," Harry said quickly, shaking his head. "It might've seemed that way, but I didn't mean it to come out like that. I know it's none of my business what goes on with you two."

Movement behind Harry's head caught Ron's attention.

"S'alright, Harry. Don't worry about it," Ron replied distractedly as his eyes trained on two wizards who had just taken up the same spot the others were in before. While the other wizards were older, these two seemed younger in build; one blond, the other one dark haired with a similar shield around them that Harry had put around him and Ron to prevent them from getting wet.

"I know you told me not to bring up the Auror thing with her, but-"

The blonde wizard turned his head to look at Ron and grinned at him in such a way that Ron's wand hand itched from holding it so tight.

Ron met his grin with a glare and muttered, "Harry…"

"I know and I'm sorry, alright? Anyway, she just brushed it off. Now I know how you both felt when I never wanted to talk." Ron glanced at Harry who sighed and pushed his glasses up on his face. "It's weird, Hermione not wanting to talk about something, you know?"

Ron was again taken away from the conversation when the dark haired wizard pulled something out of his pocket and glanced at Ron and Harry, a slight smile on his face. Ron's body went rigid as he fought the urge to shout out a hex, sending both of them to the ground, but he didn't want to incite a battle just in case more people were watching them, waiting to attack. Then the odds would not at all be in their favor. The possibility of a duel was becoming more of a reality the longer he stood there, watching their odd behavior.

"She's my best friend; you both are. I know you're together now, but I-"

"Harry, shut it, will you?" Ron said through his teeth, his eyes still fixed on the end of the alley, trying to decipher what the dark haired wizard was holding in his hand and why it was sending chills running down his spine.

"What are you looking at?" Harry said as he finally turned around and followed Ron's gaze. "Bloody hell, they don't give up, do they?"

Ron could now make out their faces and while he couldn't recognize them, he could see they were around his and Harry's age, their features young and, if it weren't for their menacing glares, otherwise innocent. The dark mark on each of their forearms was suddenly clear as day, almost as if they wanted Harry and Ron to see them, even through the dark clouds and almost blinding cascade of rain.

"Deatheaters," Harry growled and turned back to Ron, his back to them. "Just look normal, yeah? Looks they're waiting for something. But, what? And what the hell is he holding? I don't like this, Ron. We need to get out."

"Definitely," Ron whispered and rubbed his hands over his wet face, bouncing on his heels. He was aching to fight; to bring some damage to those fuckers who had a hand in killing his brother; who helped torture Hermione and tried to capture and kill Harry on more than several occasions, to put it mildly. But looking at Harry's determined face just then along with a look that said:  _Calm down, Ron. Think clearly and no sudden movements._ Ron blew out a deep breath and nodded stiffly at him. "We need to get to the girls, Harry."

He saw Harry discreetly try to apparate, but when he didn't go anywhere they stared at each other with panic in their faces.

"Shit," Harry hissed. "What the fuck is going on?"

Ron peered at the wizards again. They were tapping their wands impatiently on their legs and looking at their watches. Then he finally saw what the wizard was gripping in his hand and he forgot for a moment to look calm, but instead wanted to shit his pants.

Without looking away he whispered to Harry, his voice cracking from the fear, "Harry, remember that… that round, red thing I had Dad take to the Ministry?"

Harry nodded.

"That dark haired bloke over there… he's holding one."

Harry's head jerked slightly and his eyes narrowed. "Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Okay, well how does it work?"

"That's just it, we don't know, do we?" Ron asked desperately. "What more do we need other than it just… explodes?"

"Right. Yeah, that's not good."

After hearing the understatement of the year, Ron searched around them for a side door or a window, looking for a way to get into the Leaky Cauldron. He didn't see any on their level and cursed under his breath. Then he looked up and spotted the underside of a brick balcony jutting out over their heads with an iron black high railing, leading to a large window of one of the guest rooms in the Leaky Cauldron.

Then he looked over at the two wizards who were blocking the only way out of the alley. Harry followed Ron's eyes and seemed to understand what Ron was thinking.

"We need to go up," Harry hissed and took a deep breath. "If you stand on this dumpster I think you can reach that balcony up there."

"I say we rush them. Take 'em down," Ron hissed back, his head bobbing back and forth between looking at Harry's face and peering over his shoulder.

"That'll take too much time and too risky if there's more of 'em. We at least need to be on our way out first," Harry replied, shaking his head. "I don't like not knowing what's going on with Ginny and Hermione. I'm willing to bet anything there are more Deatheaters inside."

"Fuck. You're right," Ron conceded, the sound of Hermione's name giving him the strength to swallow the pit of fear that was lodged in his throat. "Okay, I'll-"

His words were cut off by a loud screeching noise; a high-pitched shrill so loud that they both covered their ears and doubled over. A sharp pain blossomed behind Ron's ears and spread through to the back of his head. He realized that the silencing spell Ginny had put up must have disintegrated as well as Harry's rain cover because the intense sound was mixed in with the rain and wind, and his head and body was soaked within seconds.

He squeezed his eyes shut and cried out, his screams muffled by the screeching noise and the rain pelting the ground and everything else around them. He forced his eyes open when he felt Harry's hand on his arm, pulling him to the side behind the dumpster and out of view from the alleyway. Harry was rubbing his head, but otherwise looked alright. Then he saw Harry raise his wand to Ron's temple.

For a split second Ron felt a jolt of fear, believing Harry was either possessed or polyjuiced, and was about to do him in. But in the next second everything went silent and the pain in his head was becoming more of a dull, steady ache.

Harry's lips were moving, but he couldn't hear a sound coming out of his mouth. When Ron mouthed ' _What?_ ', Harry pointed to the dumpster then up at the balcony and finally at himself and his wand. His intentions were clear: He wanted Ron to carry out with the plan to get inside the Leaky Cauldron by way of the balcony while he took care of the Deatheaters. Ron gestured to Harry and the balcony, telling him to follow right after, and Harry nodded his confirmation.

After peering around the edge of the dumpster, Harry then held up two fingers indicating there were still only two of them, and an okay sign to tell him they were good to go.

Ron took a look for himself and saw that both dark wizards were walking slowly towards them, obviously thinking they had them trapped like sitting ducks. He also noticed that they weren't wearing any kind of ear protection, leading Ron to think that either they had some kind of counter curse against the mind altering noise or they were under the same deafening spell Harry had put on Ron and himself. Either way he didn't have more time to think on it because the dark haired wizard then held up the small red ball in front of his face and laughed silently along with his fellow Deatheater.

Ron crept up the side of the dumpster and balanced himself on top of it, crouched down on his hands and knees. As he stood up with his wand out, scared out of his mind as he was now exposing himself, Harry leaped out from the behind the dumpster and aimed a disarming spell at the blonde haired wizard who jumped to the side, missing it by mere inches as he shot a hex toward Harry. Harry dodged the hex by leaping behind the dumpster again and slammed into it, making Ron almost fall on his arse on the slick wet surface.

Ron knew Harry was avoiding the man with the ball because he didn't want to detonate it. However, the Deatheater didn't seem worried as he levitated it out of his hand with his wand and sent it toward them at a steady pace. From his high vantage point, Ron quickly sent a spell at the blonde wizard, this time taking him down with a stunning spell.

Harry scrambled up top of the dumpster and stood with Ron who insisted on boosting Harry up first as he was the tallest and could get up there on his own. As soon as Harry got a hold of the iron railing, Ron turned around and saw the ball coming closer; the dark-haired wizard, not paying his fallen comrade any mind, was laughing gleefully as he backed away from them, leaving the ball to hover in mid-air. To Ron it was obvious that it was going to blow any second. He wanted to shoot every spell he could think of at the retreating Deatheater, but feared that rendering the him unconscious (or worse, if he had his way) might send the ball falling and thus creating the inevitable explosion prematurely. There was still time.

With a rage beyond belief, he let the Deatheater go and instead turned back around to push Harry's feet the rest of the way over the iron fence and onto the brick balcony. He quickly waded through the water a few paces to the other end of the dumpster and pocketed his wand.

_Please let Hermione and Ginny be safe, and if there is anything I could wish for right now it's for all of us to make it home alive._

_Fucking hell, this is SO fucked up._

And with that last thought he took off at a run, his trainers splashing through the lake-like puddle on top of the dumpster, and leapt up toward the balcony. His arms and head hit the railing and his chest slammed into the protruding brick. If he had any hearing left then he would have heard himself yell out a very colorful string of swear words.

He felt Harry's hands grip him above his elbows, squeezing his biceps as he tried to pull him up. Ron used Harry's help to stand and lean against the outside of the balcony, the heels of his trainers hanging over the side into emptiness.

He was breathing heavy, trying to catch his breath that was knocked out of him after crashing headlong into the balcony, but there was so much rain that he felt like he was drowning. His hands were gripping the columns of the soaked and slippery metal railing as he gulped in enough water and air to keep from remaining dizzy. Harry gave Ron a fervent nod and gestured for him to hurry.

Ron made the mistake of looking down to watch what was happening with the ball before he ascended the fence when suddenly he saw it open, blossoming out like a rose, red metal petals fanning out all around in every direction, in a circular pattern.

He was frozen with fear and something else he couldn't describe; as if he was almost in awe of its beauty and he wondered if Hermione had seen the same thing when she encountered the one in her family's kitchen.

The thought of Hermione shook him out of his trance and he realized Harry was pulling frantically at his arms and shirt, trying to get him over the edge and onto safer territory rather than balancing on the outside of balcony over a metal dumpster.

Ron's hands and feet were sliding on the film of water that kept covered the brick and metal, making it impossible to grab hold of much of anything. He was finally able to get his footing again and had one arm hooked at the elbow over the top of the railing.

Ron felt a panic take over his body as sound suddenly came rushing back into his ears. The painfully screeching noise was gone, but the thundering of gallons of water beating and falling in sheets on the cobblestone, brick and metal, as well as his own head, came at him with full force.

His trainers slipped again on the smooth brick, his knees scraping on the rough edge, but his arm was still hooked over the top of the railing, keeping him from slipping and falling any further.

"Ron! Ron! Hang on!" He heard Harry screaming in his ear, his voice more hysterical than he had ever heard before in all the years of knowing him. Harry grasped at him desperately and Ron used all his upper body strength to pull himself up as they worked together to keep him against the railing.

"It's gonna blow, Harry! Go!" Ron shouted when he finally had a hold of the railing again, his hand grabbing onto Harry's arm.

"No, you prat, come ON!" Harry yanked at his sodden shirt one more time with all his might, his nails digging into Ron's shoulders, and he felt his feet leave the brick as he was being pulled over the edge toward Harry. But it wasn't enough.

Ron heard the explosion before he felt it. Then he lost his hearing once again, but this time not from a spell, but the enormous boom that echoed in his ears, followed by an insistent ringing throbbing inside his brain, replacing every other sound around him as if he were in a chamber full of bells.

In the same instant that he heard the explosion, he felt the force of the blast slam against his body and his hands were no longer gripping the cool wet metal and his hand left Harry's arm, his feet no longer standing on the slippery brick.

His last image was of Harry being blown back into the window behind the balcony, and debris flying everywhere as he descended quickly toward the dumpster below. It was a very short fall, but he had time before he lost consciousness for Hermione's laughing face to sweep across his mind.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I am NOT J.K. Rowling. I don't own Harry Potter or his friends.

As the building was still shaking from the blast, Hermione grabbed onto Ginny's shoulders and shoved her down to the floor, covering the younger girl's body with her own. The windows from the front of the pub, as well as the rows of glasses behind the bar, shattered and rained down on top of them. Sliding over the shards of glass, sharp edges cutting into her knees and hands, Hermione ignored the pain and maneuvered her and Ginny to crouch underneath the table where their half eaten lunch was still sitting, no longer edible; not that it mattered since Hermione had already lost her appetite.

Hermione then used the commotion, and the fact that their table was in the back of the pub, to lead Ginny toward a door behind them that was slightly ajar. On their hands and knees, and crunching through the debris, Hermione and Ginny pushed open the small door and crawled inside a closet filled with hanging coats and jumpers.

The racket from the wind and rain muffled most of the noise enough so that Hermione couldn't make out anything more specific than shouts and screaming coming from Diagon Alley through the now glassless windows. Hermione guessed that the few remaining civilians were probably either fleeing or being captured, or worse. Hermione prayed for the first option.

"Hermione, try to disapparate," Ginny hissed into her ear then grabbed her hand.

"Oh, right," Hermione muttered then felt a sudden dread when her attempt failed miserably. She closed her eyes and concentrated harder than was necessary to disapparate once more. She opened them and found Ginny's eyes in the dark, staring at her as if not understanding why they were still crammed into a closet.

"It's not working!" Hermione whispered.

"But we saw people disapparating just moments ago!"

"They must've just put up an anti-apparation jinx; probably on the entire Diagon Alley."

"Shit."

"The girls are in here somewhere! Find them!"

Hermione realized that the storm had abruptly stopped and jumped at the clear and loud voice that boomed out over the pub, angry and full of wicked authority. She peeked out the sliver of the barely opened door and spotted two Deatheaters standing watch by the blown out door and windows and four more walking about the pub, turning over tables and chairs, presumably searching for Hermione and Ginny. Grateful that they were able to hide so quickly, Hermione deduced that the rest of the Deatheaters that were hanging about earlier were now out in the storm, making sure no one gets in or out of Diagon Alley. The Deatheater with the booming voice was standing in the middle of the room, his arms crossed over his chest. He was burly, and what he lacked in height he made up for with a domineering presence and an expression of pure evil, his deeply wrinled face contrasted with his pale and smooth bald head that turned from side to side, slowly looking in every corner of the room.

"Where's the other two?"

Hermione's eyes turned toward the door as the bald wizard turned his attention to a tall and dark haired Deatheater who looked as young as the bald one looked evil. Hermione knew he was asking about Harry and Ron and she strained her ears to listen with Ginny pressed up against her side with her head tucked under Hermione's to listen as well.

The taller Deatheater's face spread into a cocky grin and he said, "Taken care of."

Hermione's heart dropped to her knees and she almost fell over, catching herself with her hands on the floor as Ginny pulled back suddenly, a small gasp escaping her lips. Her mind raced with different scenarios in which Ron and Harry were hurt, stumbling around in the rain, unconscious, or worse: dead. Always, her mind reaches that conclusion, but as it was usually only a fear inside her mind, now it was fast becoming a reality.

"They were supposed to be together for this, Watler!"

"What does it matter? Together or apart, it'll still work!"

"Oh, Merlin. What did they do to Harry and Ron?" Ginny moaned quietly. "Oh no," she gasped, "and George!"

Hermione turned to Ginny and saw that the horror on her face matched her own thoughts so strongly that her heart sunk even lower; hope fast leaving her body with only dread taking its place.

_Get it together, Hermione. Breathe and think of Ron's voice. Imagine him with Harry and very much alive. Get out to them and for goodness sake, protect Ginny with everything you got. No matter what happens to any of us you cannot let anything happen to her._

Hermione took a deep breath and looked closely into Ginny's eyes. "Ginny, it- it'll be okay. I'm sure they're… they  _have_  to be fine. We can't think the worst, alright?"

Ginny only nodded and closed her eyes, and Hermione knew she was trying not to cry.

Hermione continued talking quietly and quickly, "I'm certain the Ministry had to have gotten notice of the explosion and I'm also certain that the Deatheaters know this, hence their urgent need to find us. And we can't disapparate so the next logical options would be to either wait for help or fight our way out. So what- "

"We fight," Ginny said at once, her face red with anger.

"Right. I knew you would say that," Hermione said with relief. Hiding only made Hermione feel like a coward, and waiting any longer to make sure Ron and Harry were alright was no longer an option. "On three, alright? One-"

Before she could finish counting, Hermione suddenly heard shouting coming from inside the pub, close to the closet that she and Ginny were huddled in, followed by more surprised and angry shouting of spells being blasted into walls and furniture.

"Expelliarmus!"

"It's Harry!" Ginny hissed excitedly and jumped up to stand, sending coats to the floor and on top of Hermione's head.

Hermione stood with her, relieved beyond belief to hear Harry's voice, and more importantly that he was  _alive_ , which meant Ron must be alive as well and Hermione almost sobbed with that thought.

"Hermione! Ginny!"

Ginny pushed open the door at the sound of Harry's voice and ran out, wand already emitting spells at the closest Deatheater, sending him across the room. Hermione felt a rush of adrenaline as she also raised her wand, her eyes searching the room for Ron's familiar head of fiery red hair. Not finding him, Hermione immediately shot a stunning spell at a Deatheater who was about to hex Harry who was making his way toward them from his position at the bottom of the stairs.

As she looked around again, Hermione could see several Deatheaters down on the ground, unconscious; undoubtedly Harry's doing.

"Where's Ron, Harry?" Hermione shouted as she sent a leg locking jinx at an approaching Deatheater.

"He's… he's outside."

"What? Why-"

Distracted, Hermione felt a spell hit her in the chest, sending her flying back through the air and landing painfully on top of a chair that fell apart from the impact.

Hermione felt the wind get knocked out of her and could look nowhere but up at the ceiling as the room spun around her. She heard Ginny shout her name followed by Harry's angry hexes and the overall noise made Hermione's head spin even more. Her breath finally came back she found she couldn't move as her limbs were being restrained with tight black ropes.

Panic filled her mind and her heart quickened, and she screamed. "Harry! Ginny!"

She heard laughter coming from several Deatheaters and turned her head to see Harry and Ginny a few feet away from her, sitting against an overturned table with the same black ropes around their bodies. Ginny was struggling against them, her long plait coming undone and whipping around her head as she cursed loudly and angrily at the Deatheaters. Harry was furious, his face red with more rage than Hermione had ever seen.

"I'm right here, Hermione," Harry said in what Hermione suspected was supposed to be a comforting tone, but given the situation and Harry's expression, it did absolutely nothing to calm her nerves.

"You fuckers better let us out! Don't you think anyone will notice that there was an explosion just now, you stupid… fucking… arses!"

"Oi, you're a spunky one, ain't you?" The tall wizard, who spoke of Ron and Harry as being 'taken care of' and who Hermione remembered as Watler, grinned at Ginny. Hermione grimaced at his horribly yellow and rotting teeth. "I sure do like you."

"Get away from her!" Harry yelled, making the Deatheater laugh.

Hermione then felt herself being levitated through the air and sent down to the ground with a thud to sit next to Harry.

"Just stay calm," Harry muttered as she started sobbing and wriggling against the ropes, feeling more desperate and frantic with every second that passed without knowing where Ron was. Hermione could feel Ginny's squirming from Harry's other side as she spouted out more obscenities and wondered why he wasn't giving her the same advice.

"Fuck you!" Ginny spat at Watler when he came closer and touched Ginny's hair. He jeered loudly, as if her very existence was only to entertain him.

"What are you going to do with us, anyway?" Harry asked and Hermione knew he was only trying to distract him and buy more time.

Diagon Alley was eerily silent, the rain having already stopped as if someone flipped a switch. Ron's absence and the fact that the Deatheaters seemed so calm with them tied up made Hermione wonder if Ron was also struggling against tight black ropes somewhere out there. She wished that scenario to be true much more than any other one she could conjure up.

Watler crouched in front of them and stared at Harry in the face, his eyes so dark they were like coal. Hermione was reminded of her nightmare so long ago and she had to stop herself from crying out.

"What do you think will happen to your precious world when everyone finds out that their hero, their 'Boy Who Lived', the one who defeated the Dark Lord, is nothing more than a twit with a scar who got him and his little friends captured so easily?"

Harry scoffed and said, "Easily? You had to shut down an entire street to get to us!"

"Technicality," he replied dismissively. "We had to wait for you to leave that hovel of a home and once we found out you were here… well, you know the rest."

"But why not just take me?" Harry asked.

"Because they wanted the four of us," Hermione said, her voice firm but quivering from the tears still streaming down her face. Her anger was overtaking her fear and worry and she used it to fuel her energy towards staying alert. "It would make a better impact, wouldn't it? Harry Potter and his friends who helped bring Voldemort down, who helped  _kill_  him, is a much better bargaining chip than just Harry alone."

"Too right. So clever," he said and regarded Hermione with both admiration and loathing.

"I don't need your praise," Hermione shot back.

"You're all insane," Ginny said incredulously. "Haven't you all learned from your many failed attempts to get at Harry that it won't work? This time is no different!"

"From the looks of it, Red, I beg to differ."

Watler stood suddenly and turned to the short bald Deatheater who was standing to the side, watching them. Hermione noticed her wand, as well as Harry's and Ginny's, sticking out from his back pocket. From what Hermione could gather Watler and the short bald Deatheater must be the leaders, Watler being the more talkative of the pair.

"Hornth, get over there and find the other one."

Before Hornth left the pub, Watler stopped him and said something that made Hermione's blood run cold.

"Dead or not, bring his arse in here with the rest of 'em."

Ginny finally stopped struggling and Hermione turned to Harry and said, "Oh my god, Harry, is Ron-"

"No," Harry said firmly, shaking his head. "I don't- I mean, I didn't see but… he can't be. I know it."

All of a sudden there was a bright light as loud cracks and pops filled the air from outside, keeping Hornth from going any further. When the blinding light finally subsided Hermione opened her eyes to see and hear Deatheaters fighting members of the remaining Order and dozens of Aurors outside the pub and throughout Diagon Alley.

"About fucking time," Ginny huffed and resumed her fruitless struggling against the ropes.

"Looks like your foolproof plan had some holes," Harry yelled to Watler who had ran back into the pub and was hiding against the wall beside the window; his partner, Hornth, having left to join in the fight.

Watler ignored Harry and instead shouted at the Deatheaters still standing around, looking at one another, clearly not prepared for this interruption. "This whole area was supposed to be impenetrable! Get out there!"

Then they were left with only Walter for company who then rounded on them and pulled his wand out, pointing it directly at Ginny.

"I can still get what I want, you know," he growled at Harry whose eyes flickered from the wand to Ginny and back to Watler.

"Why are you doing this?" Harry asked desperately. "It's over. Voldemort's dead! Just let us go!"

Without warning Watler sent Ginny down with his wand, using a spell that Hermione acknowledged at once as the Cruciatus curse. She recognized the anguished cries and screams that can only come from the pain of your insides feeling as if they were being squeezed so hard that you bones would break any second.

"No!" Hermione screamed almost as loudly as Ginny. "Stop! Stop! Please, stop!"

Her desperate and panicked cries were joined by Harry who had slid to the floor on his back and was screaming and kicking, trying to get to Watler any way he could to knock him over using his tied up body.

It felt like an eternity until Ginny went still and then Watler crumpled head first to the ground before them, Bill and George standing in his place.

"As soon as I heard the blast I shut down the shop," George was saying as he and Bill cut the ropes loose from all three of them. "I had to fight some bloody Deatheaters before I could send a Patronus to Dad."

"It was a trap," Harry said as he stood up and hastily limped over the Ginny who was conscious, but weak, and staggered to pick her up to stand. Hermione wobbled to her feet and stumbled over to Watler to snatch their wands from his pocket.

"Yeah, no shit," George said as he took Ginny's other arm and wrapped it around his shoulders. "I couldn't apparate until just now when Kingsley came and shut down the anti-apparation jinx and that barmy storm they had going all over the damn place. Where's Ron?"

"Harry, we need to find Ron," Hermione said impatiently, her head turning to the commotion outside that was quickly receding due to the number of Deatheaters that had either fled or were being put down.

"George, can you take Ginny to hospital? I need to-"

"Yes, go!" George said as Harry extricated himself from Ginny's arm. He gave her a kiss on her temple and George disappeared with Ginny on the spot.

"Show me where Ron is, Harry," Bill said as he ran out the door, Hermione and Harry on his heels.

Harry took the lead and skidded to stop in front of a pile of metal and bricks in the alleyway next to the Leaky Cauldron.

"He was… we were up there," Harry said, pointing up to a shattered window and the remaining hanging remnants of a balcony. "And he fell…"

Harry immediately started levitating and pulling off pieces of metal and brick from the rubble and Hermione stood watching him, shocked and paralyzed.

"Fucking hell," Bill muttered and started helping Harry with the debris.

"He's… in  _there_? But, how? Oh, god," she moaned, her knees buckling, not able to comprehend how Ron could have survived, falling from a balcony onto such a dangerous mess. She rushed forward and through her tears she helped them take away most of the wreckage.

As more of Ron's body was revealed, Hermione fought harder to remain calm; the need to find out if he was still alive fed her energy and kept her from falling over. Ron's face finally came into view, half covered in blood from a gash running down his freckled cheeks and over his long nose. Before she could think any further, Hermione was climbing over the bent metal and slipping on the slick bricks, ignoring Harry and Bill's warnings to be careful.

"Ron," she whispered when she finally reached his side and cupped his cool cheek in her hand, his blood mixing with hers; the lacerations from the glass inside the pub still stinging her and the bruises from being thrown across the room making her body ache with intense pain. But none of that mattered as she brought her ear down to Ron's mouth while Harry and Bill continued to uncover the rest of him.

"His legs," Bill said, his voice catching in his throat.

"Almost done," Harry replied then yelled up to Hermione, "How is he?"

She held up her hand to wait, and closed her eyes in a silent prayer, holding her breath in order to feel even the smallest pocket of air that might escape Ron's lips. Not able to feel his breath on her ear, she refused to give into the panic that was swirling inside her stomach and making her heart pound erratically inside her chest.

"I'm going to- to check his pulse."

"Hermione, is he breathing?" Harry asked as he climbed up to perch himself on Ron's other side, watching Hermione intently as she pressed her fingers to Ron's throat and lowered her head to his chest.

"Oh, my word, what happened?" Hermione could hear Mr. Weasley's urgent voice as he spoke with Bill and Kinglsey. She tuned them out and almost collapsed with relief when she felt a light thumping against the pads of her fingers.

"He's alive!" Hermione said at once, picking her head up and smiling grimly at Harry.

"Fucking hell," he sighed heavily and covered his face with his hands.

Hermione looked down at the rest of Ron's body and couldn't control the gasp as she noticed more blood along his right side and his legs that were bent at odd angles.

"We need to take him to hospital, now," Mr. Weasley said then Ron's body started to rise.

"No!" She moved to stop him, but Harry caught her in his arms and held her back. She let herself slump against Harry's chest and watched helplessly while Mr. Wealsey placed his hand on Ron's shoulder and they both disappeared.

"Oh,  _no. No!_ " Hermione sobbed as her body shook violently, making it difficult for Harry to help her down from the rubble. The scenario that she envisioned in her worst nightmares paled in comparison to the reality of what she just witnessed.

"We'll follow them there, alright?" Harry says, his hands gripping her arms tightly and his voice shaking so badly that Hermione has no choice but to nod vigorously, unable to speak as they joined Bill and Kingsley.

Kingsley said, "I was just telling Bill that we got most of them, but we will need your statements."

Harry went to speak, but Kingsley interrupted him, "But it can certainly wait. Go on to St. Mungos. They need you there more than I do."

"Thank you, sir," Harry said and looked at Hermione. She bit her lip and grabbed his hand quickly before he pulled her into a tight hug. And he held her like that as he disapparated, sending Hermione with him to possibly hear the worst news of their lives.

XXXXX

"What the hell is taking them so bloody long in there?"

Hermione watched from her seat in the waiting room as George paced the floor, from one end to the other, asking the same question every other minute and not receiving an answer. No one tried to stop and reassure him as everyone was sure to be thinking the same thing.

Hermione was sitting next to Harry who was clutching Ginny's hand, both their knuckles turning white from the pressure, but neither of them caring to pull their fingers apart. Upon arriving at St. Mungos Harry and Hermione had raced to the emergency unit and found Ginny and George, along with Mr. Weasley, in the hallway talking with a Healer. While she didn't have news on Ron's well being, the Healer reiterated to Harry and Hermione that Ginny was going to be alright, albeit very fatigued and needed rest to recover from being under the Cruciatus curse. Ginny refused a room and instead opted to wait with everyone else for news about Ron. Harry had yet to let go of her hand since.

Hermione and Harry were treated for their injuries immediately. In that short amount of time, they also healed her bitten lip, and as she ran her tongue across the smooth tissue, she couldn't have been more relieved to have it gone.

Mrs. Weasley was being comforted by Mr. Weasley while Percy sat across from them, staring down at his clasped hands. Bill sat next to him, his eyes trained on George as he continued to pace. The mood was somber, to say the least, and the silence was doing Hermione's head in.

They hadn't heard anything for what felt like hours, but looking at her watch for the hundredth time, Hermione saw it had only been thirty minutes. Not able to contain her nerves, Hermione wrapped her arms across her stomach and rocked in her seat, keeping her lips tightly together in order to stay silent. She wanted to scream and run around the room throwing anything she could find. She wanted to burst through the door and run until she found wherever they were keeping Ron and demand to see him this instant. The need for action was simmering to a boil inside her, but her rational mind told her to stay put and wait for a Healer to speak to them, something she wouldn't be able to do if she was throwing a fit and acting like a hysterical mental patient. That would only guarantee her a room on a very different floor of St. Mungo's.

"Are you alright?" Harry whispered to Hermione, and she jumped at his voice.

"I- I'm not sure," she whispered and let out a choked sob. She tucked her lips into her mouth to keep from making any further noise and gripped her sides harder, closing her eyes and shaking her head to clear it from the buzzing that was invading her mind, a sure sign that a full on panic attack was just around the bend. "I hate this, Harry," she continued, keeping her eyes shut and her voice so low that Harry had to lean in close to hear her. "I keep thinking how I knew something didn't feel right and I never said anything. I could have prevented this. I don't know what I'll do if… if-"

"Here, take my hand," Harry whispered.

She turned to Harry who was staring her unblinking. She reached up to wipe her tears and crumbled slightly under Harry's unrelenting gaze and she let out a strangled gasping sob. Harry wordlessly reached over to grab her hand from her face and squeezed firmly, his warmth helping to calm her only slightly.

"It's not your fault, Hermione," he said. His face still looked pained and his voice shook with worry as he continued, "Please don't say that. Just… breathe. Try to stay strong for Ron."

"What the hell is- Charlie!"

Hermione and Harry looked up to see George grabbing his older brother, Charlie, into a fierce hug.

"I came as soon as I got word from Percy," Charlie said and walked over to sit on Ginny's other side. "How are you little sis?"

Ginny, not letting go of Harry's hand, turned into Charlie's chest without a word and started crying. Charlie wrapped his arms around her, rubbing his hands up and down her back. "How's Ron?" he asked, looking at Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, then over to Bill who cleared his throat.

"We don't know yet," Bill said.

Suddenly a loud dull sound caught all of their attention and they turned to George who had just punched the wall, leaving a dent in the plaster, before he yanked open the door and stomped out of the room.

"Bill…"

"I'll bring him back, mum," Bill said as he hurried after George.

"Shh, it'll be okay," Charlie whispered to Ginny who was still crying loudly into his shoulder.

The door opened, revealing a middle aged, balding wizard with glasses askew on his face and robes emblazoned with the St. Mungo's logo and the name Healer Gumlick. At the sight of blue robes, Hermione let go of Harry's hand and jumped to her feet to join Mrs. Weasley who was already ahead of her.

"Where is he? How is he? Is he still alive? Can we see him?" Hermione started talking before Mrs. Weasley or the Healer could speak. She felt Mrs. Weasley take her hand and took a deep breath, clamping her mouth shut in order to let others speak.

"Please," Mrs. Weasley said as Mr. Weasley, Harry and Percy stood with them, surrounding the Healer. "Just tell us he's going to be alright."

The Healer looked down at the clipboard in his hand and said in a casual tone that Hermione disliked immediately, "I assume you're speaking of Ronald Weasley?"

"Of course we are," Hermione snapped at him. Healer Gumlick paused to look at her over his glasses at her and she quickly said, "Sorry."

Healer Gumlick dropped the clipboard down at his side and looked at Mr. and Mrs. Weasley. "Right. Ronald has suffered many injuries, both externally and internally, but he is stable for now. He is unconscious, but that is mostly due to the amount of potions we had to administer to heal his bones and the many lacerations to his face and body."

"Oh, dear," Mrs. Weasley moaned, the grip on Hermione's hand growing tighter. She held onto the older woman's hand just as tightly, trying her best to give her strength that she herself was struggling to find.

"How many bones did he break?" Charlie asked from behind them. She turned around to see him still holding Ginny whose tears had subsided, but had her head on his shoulder. Seeing her like that, looking so much younger than she was and weak from lingering pain, made Hermione sick with regret that she couldn't do more to help her. She swallowed thickly and turned back to hear what the Healer had to say, steeling herself for more bad news.

Healer Gumlick looked at the chart on his clipboard and pushed his glasses up on his nose before running his finger down the paper. Hermione shifted on her feet and felt a sudden urge to snatch that damn clipboard from his hand and read it herself.

"Let's see… He broke both his femurs, his right elbow and three ribs," he said matter-of-factly. "But-"

"But bones can be regrown and set back to new again, right?" Hermione said hastily and turned to Harry. "Remember second year? Skelegro?"

Harry nodded vigorously. "Yes, that's right, Hermione."

"Yes," the Healer said as, slightly annoyed at being interrupted. "However, with more than one bone being broken in one body the potion will take longer to work. It will, no doubt, but the process will be a bit more painful than if he ere to just break, say, an arm for example."

"And… internally?" Mr. Weasley asked. Hermione didn't know if she wanted to hear the rest. Knowing that Ron would be in so much pain for so long was making her feel queasy enough as it was.

Heal Gumlick regarded his clipboard again and clicked his tongue as he flipped through the first few pages then stopped with a frown. "Well, yes... Oh, my."

"What? What is it?" Hermione shrieked. She let go of Mrs. Weasley's hand and stepped forward to grab the clipboard from him, her impatience winning out. She almost had it when Harry pulled her back at the last second.

"Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to calm down," the Healer said slowly as if he was talking to a small child.

"Don't you-"

"Hermione, please just let him tell us what's wrong with Ron, then we can see him," Harry said, his arm holding her around her back and keeping her tight against his side.

"I'm so-sorry," Hermione cried and covered her face with her hands.

"It's alright, dear," Mrs. Weasley said with a sniffle and stroked Hermione's hair.

"May I continue?"

"Yes, please," Harry said through his teeth, trying to control his temper with the Healer. Hermione nodded and took a shuddering breath to calm her nerves.

"I'm sorry, c- continue."

"We did a scan of his internal organs and while his heart and lungs are intact, other tests show that he did have some internal bleeding from a ruptured liver and spleen."

Harry's arm tightened around Hermione's waist and she heard Ginny's muffled cry from behind her. She closed her eyes so she didn't have to see the Healer as he spoke, his passive face making her want to rip off his glasses and break them in half.

"Oh, my boy," Mrs. Weasley gasped and held her hand to her chest.

"Was there any in his brain?" Mr. Weasley asked.

"No, his brain is fully functional. We were able to stop the bleeding before it compressed his other organs, but the damage to his liver and spleen will have to heal with a slower healing potion than we would normally administer since the skelegro and other potions he's taking will counteract with anything more potent."

"Does he need blood?" Harry asked.

"No, it's all taken care of."

"When can we see him?"

"Immediate family first. Unless you're related by blood you will have to wait," Healer Gumlick said with finality as he set the papers back onto the clipboard and snapped his quill back into place. "I can gather as much that you are not family so I will ask you and your friend to stay here while the rest come back with me."

"We're as much family as anyone!" Harry exclaimed.

"Those are the rules, I'm sorry." Hermione saw a flicker of remorse in the Healer's eyes before he escorted Mr. and Weasley, along with Percy and Charlie out of the room.

"This is so fucked up!" Harry yelled and sat back down next to Ginny, his hands in his hair. "Why didn't you go with them?" he asked her, his voice lowering to a more gentle tone.

Ginny sighed and tucked her feet under her. "I'd rather stay with you, if you don't mind. We'll see him together, yeah?"

"I don't mind," Harry said and rubbed his hand on her leg soothingly. "Hermione?"

Hermione was standing in the same spot in the middle of the room, staring at the closed door. She heard the swirling and humming of what sounded like a thousand bees inside her head, expanding her brain until she felt like it might ooze out of her ears. She slowly brought her hand up to her chest and felt her heart pounding rapidly; reminding her of how slow Ron's was under her fingers just moments ago. Now he was back there somewhere, unconscious, battered and bruised, and in pain. There was nothing she could do for him but stare and let her head and heart tell her that this was real. This was actually happening. Otherwise she might fall into blackness, and rather than fight her way out, she might welcome it; and that thought scared her more than anything else.

"Hermione?"

She could now feel her heart beating inside her ears, making everything else sound muffled. It wasn't until she felt something touch her shoulder that she realized she was holding her breath the entire time.

"Harry," she gasped and turned around to face him.

"Hermione, are you alright?"

She gulped in air, but her throat was cut off, not letting anything but saliva trickle down into it, making her cough and sputter. She grabbed onto Harry's arms and choked; a foul taste filled her taste buds and she covered her mouth with one hand. Pushing Harry to the side, she ran to the open door of the loo and threw herself onto the floor in front of the toilet, vomiting her breakfast and the contents of her pathetic excuse for a lunch into it.

Her hair was being pulled away from her face and she felt Harry's warm hand on the back of her neck, rubbing her skin as she continued to moan and dispel what was no longer food, but the bile inside her stomach.

"Just… let it out, okay? It'll be… oh, that's gross. Sorry."

Hermione didn't have the energy to feel embarrassed, but instead felt grateful that Harry was there with her, taking care of her. She gripped the sides of the bowl and rested her forehead on the cool porcelain.

"Oh, god, my head hurts" she moaned and grimaced from the smell of her own breath.

"Should I get someone?" Ginny said from the doorway. Then she heard water running from the tap and assumed it was Ginny because Harry was still on his knees next to her, holding her hair and rubbing her back.

"No," he said and his hand left her back. "Thanks." A cold, wet towel was then pressed to her hot neck and she sighed and moaned simultaneously. "I think she just needed to… you know."

"I have some Pepper-Up potion that the Healers gave me if you want some, Hermione."

Hermione shot her head up and winced from the pain in her head that felt like it was being compressed by two large steamrollers. "No thanks, Ginny. I have something they gave me, too." She patted her bag against her hip and laid her head back on the toilet, the coolness having worn off and now she just felt sweaty and gross.

"I'm alright now, Harry," she said as she wobbled to her feet. He let go of her hair and stood with her, handing her the towel.

"Are you sure?"

Just then Bill and George returned to the waiting room and called out to Ginny, asking where everyone went.

"I'll go talk to them," she said to Hermione and Harry, and then backed out from the doorway."Take your time. I'll knock when they come back."

Harry hurried over to Ginny and pecked her on the lips. He whispered something in her ear before he let her go and closed the door behind him.

"I said I'm fine, Harry," Hermione said, her back to him. She cleaned her mouth with her wand and splashed ice cold water on her face from the sink.

"Well, I'm not."

She closed the tap and turned around, water dripping off her face and they looked at each other, not speaking and not moving. Hermione could see the fear and worry all over Harry's face then watched as it folded into itself; his eyes squeezed shut and his lips pressed together. His shoulders started to shake as his hands covered the tears that fell down his anguished expression.

"I tried to help him, Hermione," he cried and slid to the floor, his back against the door. "I had him in my hands and I… I let go. The railing was high and he was so… heavy. And the rain and that fucking ball. Fuck."

Hermione dropped to her hands and knees and crawled to him. She could hear Ginny talking to Bill and George on the other side of the door in the waiting room and quickly put up a silencing charm on the loo.

"We can't think like that, Harry, please. You told me earlier-"

"I told you not to blame yourself and I was right," he said and wiped his nose with his sleeve. "It's all my fault."

"No!" she exclaimed. "We can't go around talking like this anymore. I can't take it, Harry. I can't-"

Her words caught in her throat and she sobbed into her hands, dropping her head onto Harry's shoulder. They both cried, and although she still felt nauseated, she didn't feel the onset of an attack. Instead she cried out of fear and sadness; but also out of worry, thinking how she was going to be able to cope with Ron's injuries and help him recover when she still felt so out of it. How can she help him get better physically when she was so mentally screwed up?

"You won't have to help him alone," Harry said quietly as if reading her mind. "He has his entire family, and me. He'll be back to cracking corny jokes and taking the piss out of the both of us before you know it."

Hermione lifted the silencing spell since she didn't want to miss their chance to see Ron then hugged Harry around the waist. "Thank you, Harry. You're a great friend."

"Yeah, I could be better," he said.

Hermione sat up to correct him when they heard a loud knock on the door behind them followed by Ginny's voice.

"Harry, Hermione? They're back. We can see him now!"


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a monster of angst. And that is your only warning.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

Mrs. Weasley leaned heavily on her husband's shoulder as they walked back into the waiting room, wiping her nose with a handkerchief that looked like it had seen better days. Hermione watched as Ginny rushed over to her mum and pulled her into a tight hug.

"Oh, my sweet girl," Mrs. Weasley sobbed into Ginny's hair then pulled back and kissed her soundly on the forehead. "Your brother, he's… he's going to be alright. Just fine."

"I'm sure he will, Mum. Ron is a fighter, we all know that," Ginny said firmly, although laced with worry. She rubbed her mother's back as she guided her to the closest chair near the door. "Where are Charlie and the others?"

Mr. Weasley picked his head up and looked at all of them before answering for his wife. "Charlie went with Bill to catch Fleur up and gather some things to stay at the Burrow tonight. George and Percy are already there waiting for us."

"Are you staying here with Ron, mum?" Ginny asked.

Hermione noticed Mrs. Weasley glance over at her before she answered with a grim smile," I wanted to, but we agreed that, amongst all of us… Hermione would be the best person to stay. See, they only allow one person overnight and well…"

"Oh," Hermione stuttered loudly, taken aback by being singled out. "Surely as his mother you would be best to stay with him, Mrs. Weasley. I wouldn't want to disregard any rules or overstep my bounds."

Hermione swallowed thickly as Mrs. Weasley sat up to her full height and took a shaky breath, her eyes steadily looking into Hermione's as she spoke to her husband.

"Arthur, can you show Harry and Ginny to Ron's room? I would like to talk to Hermione for a moment, please."

Hermione gulped as she quickly glanced at Harry who looked just as confused. She tried to think of what she had done or said in that moment to illicit a private conversation with Ron's mother. Her nerves were on end the longer Mrs. Weasley stared at her, the buzzing inside her ears growing louder.

"Of course, Molly," Mr. Weasley said as he stood up and kissed her temple. "Harry, there are a few things I would like to ask you on the way as well. Come along, Ginny." With one last glance over their shoulders, Harry and Ginny followed Ron's father out into the corridor, leaving Hermione alone with the matriarch of the Weasley family, still staring intently at her with an indiscernible expression on her face.

"Come sit next to me, Hermione," Mrs. Weasley said in a softer voice, patting the seat next to her. Hermione hurried over to the seat and Mrs. Weasley took one of her hands into both of hers, squeezing gently. That one gesture was enough to keep Hermione from losing the last bit of control she had left.

"Tell me," Hermione said shakily. "How is he, really? Is he really going to be alright? You can tell me the truth. P-Please."

"He  _will_  be, of that I am most certain," Mrs. Weasley said with a passion. "But," she continued, "he will need  _your_  strength, Hermione. That is why I agreed to step aside and have you stay with him tonight." Her gaze was unrelenting and Hermione felt such pressure on her that the threat of being flattened from it scared her immensely. "I have to think about my boy in there… so broken…" She sniffed and Hermione's heart broke even more as she squeezed her hand back, trying her best to give back some reassurance. "He loves you so much... So much."

Tears fell freely from Hermione's eyes as she said, "I know, Mrs. Weasley. And I love him more than anything. I'm so sorry. This never should have happened. I -"

"Now you listen to me," Mrs. Weasley said sternly, making Hermione sit up. Even through her misery and anxiety she knew that when Mrs. Weasley used that tone, you pay attention. "We may have won the battle months ago, but it is still a cruel, dark world with more evil out there just waiting to take over. We have to make sure we don't forget that. We also have to make sure we keep those we love close to us and do what we can to help them. Do you understand my meaning, dear?"

"Mrs. Weasley, I-"

"Call me Molly, dear. I think we're beyond formalities by now, don't you?" Mrs. Weasley said kindly.

"Yes… Molly," Hermione said, feeling quite strange using such a casual name for a woman she considered a parental figure in her life for so many years. "What I wanted to say was that I want to do anything I can for him. Ron has… he's been a… he's such an important p-part of my life and-" Hermione paused as the words caught in her throat. She was thankful when Molly sat there quietly, waiting patiently for her catch her breath, as she patted Hermione's hand.

She looked up at Molly's pained, but understanding expression, and felt her walls come down as she continued talking softly, as if confiding in her a secret that she dared not tell anyone. "I don't know what I'm doing, Mrs.- Molly," Hermione whispered. "I- I don't know if I'm strong enough anymore..." She shook her head and willed herself to keep talking, even though she wasn't quite sure what she was trying to say. "Ever since we came back I haven't been myself at all. I don't know what I can do for him. He deserves someone who can be stronger than this. I… I want to see him so badly, but… I can't imagine how I'm going to react, knowing the details of his… injuries. Oh, god…"

Hermione let out a cry and bent over in her seat, sobbing, as embarrassment and sorrow filled her up. Molly's soothing hand down her back only made her feel coddled and useless. She had broken down for the second time in the space of an hour, and knew that it wouldn't be the last. She sat there crying into her hands, listening to Molly's shushing sounds and feeling the experienced hand of a mother who knew exactly how to soothe. After a few moments Hermione calmed down and sat up, not meeting Molly's eyes.

"You know  _exactly_  what to do," Molly said as she cupped Hermione's chin. "You're going to march into that room, sit by Ron's side and hold his hand. And you're going to embrace that boy and talk to him until you're blue in the face, if you have to. I know you're scared now, but I also know your heart, Hermione. It is the same as mine: big enough to break, but it holds strong for the ones we love. We do whatever it takes, yes?"

Hermione nodded with her eyes wide as she took in the sincerity and truthfulness of Molly's words. She was overwhelmed by so many emotions that she found it hard to speak. "Yes, of course," Hermione whispered.

Then Molly let go of her chin and cupped her cheek for a moment, smiling fondly before standing and fixing the flowered housecoat that she had obviously thrown on in her haste to floo to St. Mungos.

"Let's go see our boy, then, shall we?"

XXXXX

As they approached Ron's hospital room Hermione could see a spot of dark red hair in the middle of the corridor, standing out amongst the stark white walls and the light colors of Healers' robes rushing about.

"Ginny!" Hermione called out and ran ahead of Molly toward Ron's sister who was pacing in front of a closed wooden door. A tall, foreboding wizard dressed in black robes with the Ministry insignia on his chest stood to the right of door, unsmiling and looking at every single person who walked by, including Hermione.

"Hermione." Ginny breathed a sigh of relief when Hermione caught up to her. Before she could question her, Ginny spoke quickly. "Harry went with dad to talk to Kingsley. He took one look at Ron and got so angry… he said that he'll take care of it, to tell you not to worry about speaking with anyone. They even have an Auror outside the room just in case… I said I'd wait here for you to come back."

"Ginny, what's happening? Where are Harry and your father?" Molly asked breathlessly as she came to a stop beside Hermione.

"I was just telling Hermione that they went to speak to Kingsley about what happened," Ginny replied as she tugged on her hair anxiously. "I'm going there next, but I wanted to see you both first." She glanced at the closed door beside them and bit her lip. "I couldn't sit in there any longer. Watching him, the way-"

"Ginny," Molly said quickly, "I'll go with you to the Ministry, alright? I would like some answers for myself."

"Yeah, alright," Ginny muttered and sighed heavily, crossing her arms over her chest and lowering her head.

Hermione was only half listening as her mind was already on the other side of the door with Ron. The need to see his face again and the urge to run in the other direction were fighting for control inside her mind, giving her a massive headache. When Molly touched her shoulder she jumped, not realizing they had stopped talking.

"The worst of it over, dear. It will get better. Just remember what we spoke about," she told Hermione. "Would you like us to go in with you before we leave?"

"No," Hermione said quickly. "I think I can manage." As soon as she finished speaking she wanted to take it all back and beg her to stay and not let her go in there alone.

"Alright then," Molly said with a sigh. "I'm going to the Ministry with Ginny then home to get something for you to eat and Ron's favorite blanket. It's dreadfully cold in this place." She wrung her hands tightly against her stomach and the confidence that radiated from her just moments ago seemed to dissipate.

"Thank you, that would be lovely," Hermione said gratefully, knowing that refusing her offer would be a great offense at a time like this.

Ginny reached over and took her mother's hand and turned to Hermione. "I'll tell them everything that happened from our side of things, don't worry. See you tomorrow?"

She looked so miserable that Hermione pulled her into a hug and the two girls held each other tight, thankful to one another for being alive.

"Thank you, Hermione. You saved my life today," Ginny whispered and sniffed against her hair. Hermione could only nod and say, "Thank you" before they pulled apart and smiled at each other, nothing else needing to be said.

Hermione watched as they walked down the corridor and out of sight, leaving her alone in the still bustling corridor. She couldn't hear any of it as the absence of Ginny and Molly allowed for no distraction from her anxiety and her head was buzzing once again. She took a deep breath and placed her hand on the knob of Ron's hospital room door and turned it, making it creak quietly as she pushed it open.

There was a curtain pulled halfway around a bed so she couldn't see his face, but she knew it was him. The bottom half was visible and his tall frame that was too large for the bed made his socked feet hang out over the edge; and the crisp white blanket, too small even for him, rode up exposing a bit of his pale and freckled ankles. The room was cold, just as Molly said, and Hermione's first thought was that at least he was wearing socks without holes in them. Hermione stepped quickly inside the room, just enough to squeeze through, then closed the door behind her and sank against it, a hand over her wildly beating chest as she closed her eyes and counted to ten.

She could turn back now; run away and hide from the pressure of having to keep herself together. She could return to her parents' home and curl up in her childhood bed and let the worry eat at her and the fear take over. She could give in to the stress and panic until she passed out so she wouldn't have to deal with all the conflicting emotions. All she wanted to do was let it out and scream at the top of her lungs as she did in the loo that day. Only this time she wouldn't stop. She would keep screaming until her vocal chords burst and she rendered herself deaf, and then she wouldn't have to voice her distress or hear any more wretched news. She'd shut herself away in the dark and close her eyes to all the sorrowful expressions of everyone around her. She'd no longer be able to see them, but the image of Ron cut, twisted and bloody in the middle of the pile of metal and bricks would forever be stained in her mind, slowly making her mental enough to finally crack. Only then, she thought, would she find peace in the silence and darkness of her own insanity.

She counted to twenty.

As these last thoughts whirled around in her brain and dissipated as she counted down, Hermione opened her eyes and set to staring at Ron's legs and feet, blowing air in and out of her lungs slowly and purposefully.

_Or I can suck it up and remember who I am, or who I used to be: Someone who isn't afraid of feelings, but embraces them and uses them to become stronger, to help my friends when they need me. I need to remember who it is I'm supposed to be fighting for. This isn't a Deatheater or a dementor, or a Horcrux. The danger in this room is not anything else but my own mind. I need to be here for Ron, not for myself._

Molly's words rang in her ears,  _"I know you're scared now, but I also know your heart, Hermione. It is the same as mine: big enough to break, but it holds strong for the ones we love. We do whatever it takes…"_

Hermione took one step toward the bed and then another, repeating a mantra in her head to keep her feet moving:  _He isn't dead, he's only sleeping. He isn't dead, he's only sleeping…_

They relied heavily on wand magic and potions to heal their patients at St. Mungos, so the only furniture in Ron's room was a single bed, a bedside table, one gray, oversized and squishy chair, and a wall of cabinets over a counter that held a sink. The walls were a dull white with nothing on them. It was cold and sterile and nothing at all like Ron. She hated it immediately.

"Oh, Ron," Hermione whispered when the rest of his body came into view. She trailed her fingertips along the edge of the bed as she walked around to the other side to stand near his head. "Oh, god. Ron…"

Surprised that she had any left, Hermione didn't try to stop the tears as she gazed down at him through blurry eyes. His face was free of scars since the abrasions he suffered there were easily healed by magic. His cheeks, usually tinted pink by either the sun or a blush, were so pale that the spattering of freckles there was more pronounced than ever. His entire body was still, the only movement coming from his blonde lashes as his eyes moved rapidly around inside his head. Hermione choked out a sob and hoped he wasn't having a nightmare. She leaned one hand gingerly on the bed next to his arm that wasn't heavily bandaged, while the other reached out and palmed his left cheek. It felt so cold under her hand, which made her sob even more.

"Ron?" she whispered his name again and placed her other hand to his right cheek, leaning forward to kiss him lightly on his forehead. "I l-love… you," she whispered, her lips still on his skin, almost unable to get any of the words out. "Can you hear me? I-I'm here, o-okay? It's H-Hermi-ione."

She didn't expect him to move under her touch, but she was still disappointed as he laid there, his head up to the ceiling, and a slight frown frozen on his face. Hermione closed her eyes and slowly lowered her head, tucking her head between his neck and shoulder and held it there, still holding his face in her hands. Then she broke down once again, this time not holding back as her tears soaked through his hospital gown, and loud cries were muffled by his hair and neck.

"I'm so s-sorry!" she wailed and gripped his face tighter, her saliva mixing with tears and her nose running. "I should have been with you. I'm so glad you're okay." She let in a shuddering breath then a new wave of sobs wracked her body and she wrapped her arms delicately around his neck, careful not to press on his torso. "I'm never going to let anything happen to you  _ever_  again, do you hear me, Ronald Weasley?" She kissed his wet neck and ran her fingers through his hair.

She didn't know how long she sat there crying like that, but eventually it subsided, leaving her spent and her face still buried next to his, struggling to regain her normal breathing. A tap on her shoulder made Hermione sit up abruptly, hair sticking to her tear stained face. She turned around to see a young and attractive looking female Healer standing behind her, looking apologetic.

"Miss Granger? I'm so sorry, but I need to give Mr. Weasley his potions." Hermione stood up clumsily from the bed and read her tag that said Healer Smeltling.

"Oh, no, it's alright. I'm sorry," Hermione said as she wiped her face with the back of her hand. Healer Smeltling dug into her pocket and offered Hermione a clean handkerchief, which she took gratefully. "Thank you," Hermione said after using it and cleaning it with her wand, handing it back to the Healer. "I was just, er…"

"No, please," Smeltling said and held up one hand to stop Hermione from apologizing. She tucked a strand of straight blond hair behind her ear and smiled warmly down at Ron. "I think it's lovely, really. From what I just witnessed I can tell you care very deeply for him."

Hermione smiled down at Ron and fixed his hair that she had mussed. "Yes, I do." Then she gestured to the cart behind Smeltling that held a metal tray displaying at least a dozen vials of different colored potions and asked, "Are all those just for him?"

Smeltling looked back and shook her head. "Oh, goodness no," she laughed softly. "I have to administer potions to rest of the patients on this floor who suffered from the attack today." She moved around to the front of the cart and wheeled it to the other side of the bed.

Hermione was stunned. "There are more? How many were hurt? Are any… dead?"

"None dead, thank Merlin. Only 3 others were hurt, all Aurors, and far less than Mr. Weasley here," Smeltling said as she separated out four potions from the rest and four empty vials in front of them with lines across them for measuring. "Of course I'm assuming that's because the others weren't the real target." Then she looked up quickly at Hermione and said, "Oh, I'm sorry! That was tactless of me."

"It's fine, don't worry. You're right, we were the target," Hermione said, shaking her head. She sat down cautiously on the bed near Ron's hip and lifted his hand into hers, staring down into his face. She didn't want to miss the moment he woke up because if she did then he would think she wasn't strong enough for him. And she wanted desperately for him to know that she was, even if she didn't believe it herself.

"Well, I'm glad you all made it out of there. Mr. Weasley is very lucky to be alive," Smeltling said as she carefully measured out the four potions on the tray.

"So you think he'll have a full recovery?" Hermione asked.

"Oh, yes," Smeltling said without hesitation. "It will be a long recovery, half a year at most… but he's young and in decent health otherwise. I don't see why he wouldn't be back to normal sooner."

Hermione smiled at Ron and laughed quietly. "Ron is anything but normal."

"That's a good thing, I suppose" Smeltling replied with a chuckle. Hermione saw her move closer with one of the vials in her hand and moved to stand up, but Smeltling stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. "No need to move. It's really quick."

Hermione watched as the young Healer used her wand to open Ron's mouth and tipped the potion in as she muttered a spell to help him swallow.

"That was a potion for general pain. I like to give it first before the healing potions as they cause some discomfort and pain. This way he won't feel the effects as badly as if I had left this one for last."

"How long will he have to take them?" Hermione asked eagerly. This was her element; asking questions and learning everything she could about a subject in order to put it to use. Making sure Ron took his potions, and how much and when, was something Hermione could handle. It put her mind at ease to have something else to think about besides feeling useless and weak.

Smeltling went back to the tray to retrieve another potion and said, "Three potions are given at the same time, every four hours when he gets home: One for pain, one for healing and the last to repair his bones. He will have to come in once a week for check-ups and take the potions until he's fully healed." She stood at the bedside and held up the second potion to her eyes to make sure it was the correct dosage. "The last one over there is a sleeping draught that can be given when needed, preferably at bedtime, but never within an hour after administering these three potions. It helps with the pain as well. He was given a dose when he first came in will get another one in an hour so he will sleep through the night."

She bent over and gave Ron the healing potion then said, "Until his bones grow back we can't fully heal his ruptured organs, but it definitely won't get any worse."

Hermione kissed his hand and nodded, taking a deep breath and mentally taking notes and making checklists inside her brain as she kept her eyes on Ron and the Healer at the same time. "Will you give me a list of the potions and dosages?"

"Of course, Miss Granger. His mum and dad asked for one as well. And his sister and brothers. Like I said he's very lucky," Smeltling said with a smile before grabbing the third vial carefully as it was filled to the brim. "Now this is Skele-gro," she said and slowly let it down his throat. "There you are, you poor thing," she muttered when he was finished swallowing then gently closed Ron's mouth.

Hermione watched in awe, not only at seeing the kind way the Healer was treating Ron, but was surprised at how she, herself, was reacting to all of it. She fully expected to be crouched in a corner of the room, refusing to believe this was real and pulling her hair out by the roots. Either that or passing out from the sight of Ron's unconscious body.

However, looking down at Ron as she sat on his hospital bed, holding his hand – just as Molly said she would – and discussing his injuries and recovery with Healer Smeltling, and even though she was still racked with worry and fear, there was an eerie calm that had washed over her. She looked over at Healer Smeltling who smiled at her as she placed the used vials into a bin under the cart. Perhaps it was her and the way she spoke to Hermione and the way she treated Ron with so much care and kindness that had put Hermione at ease.

"He will have to stay in hospital overnight for the next three days," Smeltling continued. "While he's here I will be giving him his potions much more often than he will be taking them at home. So you will be seeing me again soon."

"Whatever it takes," Hermione replied. She blew out a long breath as she let the new information sink in, feeling slightly overwhelmed by it all. She thought about taking a quill and parchment out of her bag to write everything down, but she couldn't be bothered to let go of Ron's hand, not when Healer Smeltling said he could wake at any moment.

"Do you have any other questions?"

Hermione glanced back at the Healer as she started toward the door, wheeling the cart in front of her and stopping at the foot of the bed.

"Oh!" Hermione said suddenly. "Do you mind if I lengthen the bed?"

Healer Smeltling chuckled and shook her head. "He is rather tall, isn't he? Not a problem. You might want to widen it as well. You may rest with him, but please mind his injuries."

"Yes, I will. Thank you for everything," Hermione said with a slight blush, and gave her a small smile.

"Just doing my job," Healer Smeltling replied. "And don't worry, he'll be just fine." Then she was gone.

Hermione turned back to Ron who still hadn't stirred and sighed. She started to lower her head to his chest, but remembered about his broken ribs and quickly sat up again. She stood to her feet and looked around the room, suddenly at a loss of what she was supposed to be doing. Confusion set in and her heart started racing as the silence settled in around her. Talking with the Healer had distracted her and now it was entirely too quiet.

"Just get it together," she said out loud to herself. "You were supposed to… the bed, right."

Still holding onto Ron's hand, Hermione took her wand out of her pocket and lengthened the bed with a shaky hand. Then she widened it in order to make room for herself. She hastily tossed her bag onto the gray chair and slipped off her shoes, kicking them with her toes underneath the bed. Then Hermione stopped and stared at Ron, watching his eyes move under his closed lids, as it was the only indication that he was still alive. She was startled when the door opened and Molly came bustling in, toting three containers of food and a large canvas bag hanging from her wrist.

"Oh, good, he's still sleeping," she whispered and closed the door gently with her foot.

Hermione finally let go of Ron's hand, placing it gently on the bed, and padded on her socked feet to relieve Molly of her packages.

"You just missed Healer Smeltling," Hermione said as she set the containers on the counter.

"She is a dear, isn't she? Nothing like that other Healer, Gumlick. Which is why I requested Healer Smeltling myself," Molly replied matter-of-factly. She pulled a heavy orange quilt, with the words 'Chudley Cannons' sewn into it, out of her bag and hurried over to the bed, covering Ron from his feet all the way up to his chin.

Hermione hugged her middle with one arm and brought one hand to her mouth as she watched Ron's mother pepper his face with kisses.

"She said he'll have to say here for three days," Hermione continued with her fist clenched under her chin. Watching the affection that Ron's mother had towards her son and seeing the worry etched on the older woman's face was doing Hermione's head in. She was rooted to the spot, but needed to keep talking before she lost it again "She also said she would give us all a copy of all his potions and dosages. And that he will be fully recovered, most likely in a few months. That's good news, right?"

Molly looked up from Ron and gave Hermione a knowing smile. "Yes, it certainly is," she said then rummaged through her bag and took out a shirt and pajama bottoms along with a pair of Hermione's knickers. Hermione's eyes widened as Molly handed over the clothes to her, slightly horrified that she was being handed her own knickers by Molly Weasley.

"Oh, come now, Hermione. I've washed your knickers for years," Molly said, waving off Hermione's embarrassed expression. "Ginny threw these in for you. Let me know if there is anything else you need."

"Oh, thank you. Tell Ginny I said thank you as well," Hermione stuttered then let out a sound somewhere between a snort and a sob when she looked down and realized Ginny had given her Ron's favorite t-shirt, black with two bright orange C's across the chest.

"Is something the matter, dear?" Molly asked.

Hermione shook her head and smiled. "No, it's nothing. I'm just a mess. I'm sorry."

"You're allowed to be a mess, Hermione," Molly said gently then pulled her into a hug that only a mother could give. Hermione held the clothes in one hand as she wrapped her arms around Molly's back and realized that she carried with her the scent of the Burrow. Hermione breathed her in deeply and felt peace; and even if it only lasted for a second, it was enough.

"Love you," she said in a moment of extreme vulnerability. "Thank you so much for being like a mother to me."

"Oh, Hermione," Molly said, laughing as she cried. "I love you too, you silly girl."

"Now we're both a mess, aren't we?" Molly said when they pulled apart, both wiping their eyes, then turned back to glance at Ron and sobered quickly. "I'll stay with him while you change then I have to be off. Visiting hours are almost over."

Hermione nodded and smiled as she gave Molly's arm a squeeze and walked into the loo that was inside the room to change her clothes.

Standing in front of the mirror, wearing Ron's t-shirt and her pajama bottoms, Hermione stared at herself, practicing some breathing techniques she had read in a self help book that her father had given her a few weeks ago. She wanted to run out and join Ron as soon as she was dressed, but held back to give Molly some time alone with him before she left for the night. Hermione looked at her watch and saw that it was almost five o'clock. Her stomach rumbled and she thought about her lunch that got ruined by the attack on Diagon Alley-well, on them to be more specific. She remembered the shards of glass all over the floor as she and Ginny crawled over them, cutting their skin along the way. The memory of being holed up in that closet was closing in on her as she looked around the small loo that looked like it was shrinking. She heard the voices of the Deatheaters discussing where they might be hidden then again when they mentioned the possibility of Ron being dead so casually…

She gripped the edge of the sink in front of her and shook her head. "Stop it," Hermione said out loud, using her voice to cut through the noises in her head. "Don't think about all that right now."

She rummaged through her bag that she had brought in with her and found a small flask of Calming Draught that the Healer that checked her and Harry out had given her. She opened the flask and took a tiny sip, shivering as the cool drop sank down her throat and settled in her chest. She felt the effects immediately. The buzzing in her ears subsided and she was able to take a deep breath without feeling it shake her entire body. She still felt anxious and overwhelmed, but also like she could finally just… breathe.

"Hermione, dear," came Molly's voice through the door followed by a soft knock.

Hermione placed the flask back into her bag and gathered her belongings and wand then opened the door. "Sorry, do you have to leave now? I wish you could stay."

"Yes, I wish that as well," Molly said in a voice that made it clear she didn't want to leave. "But I know he is in very capable hands."

Hermione glanced over Molly's shoulder at Ron and said, "I'll my best. Perhaps you would like to stay tomorrow night?" Now that she had faced down her fear of being able to handle the situation, Hermione didn't like the idea of leaving Ron even for a minute. But she felt like it was the proper thing to do, offering to step aside.

Molly smiled sadly and clasped her hands in front of her. "Oh, you're sweet, but I dare say Ronald might have a problem having his old mummy hovering over him. No, I will leave that for when he returns home, shall I?"

Hermione grinned and said, "Yes well, you know he's going to absolutely hate all the doting he's going to get from everyone."

"Oh, he'll love it," Molly said waving her hand and glancing back at Ron. "Alright, I'll be off then. Is there anything else you needed, dear?

Suddenly Hermione remembered something and said, "Yes, can you somehow get word to my parents about what happened? We were supposed to see them tomorrow…"

"I'll send Arthur over first thing."

Molly touched her hand briefly on Hermione's shoulder and walked to Ron and kissed him on his forehead, pressing her hand on his face before straightening and walking toward the door. She stopped and turned around, fixing Hermione with a stern look. "And don't forget to eat. You're looking way too thin for my liking." Then with a smile she was out the door.

Hermione waited until she was sure Molly was long gone before she shoved her feet into her trainers and crossed the room, wand in hand and stuck her head out, looking up and down the corridor. She took inventory of the number of Healers and interns that were at the various desks, the number of doors across and on either side of them, and the location of all the exits. She glanced back at Ron and hesitated. She didn't want to leave him, but told herself that it would only take a minute and that she would never be able to sit still if she didn't at least try.

She slipped out into the corridor and closed the door behind her. Then she turned to the Auror standing guard. He was the same one from when she first entered the room; dark hair, tall, muscular and with a look that could turn stone to ice.

"Hello, I'm Hermione Granger," she said in the most straight forward tone she could muster and stuck out her hand. He looked startled that she had addressed him and for a second his cool demeanor faltered which he remedied at once and took her hand, giving it a firm shake.

"Yes, I know who you are," he said without smiling, but with respect in his voice. "Auror Thestle. May I help you with something?"

She crossed her arms and hoped that the fact that she was wearing pajamas didn't deter from her line of questioning. "Yes, I don't want to distract you from your watch, but I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions?"

He crossed his arms as well and stared down at her with a quirked eyebrow. "You can ask me anything. Whatever makes you feel secure. That's what I'm here for. I've already answered a lot of questions from Mr. Weasley's family, but I'm happy to oblige."

"Excellent," Hermione said with a sigh of relief. "When is your shift over here?"

He looked at his watch and said, "I am switched out at midnight, so in about seven hours. Then I will return tomorrow at 9am sharp."

"And who will be replacing you?"

"Auror Foster and I will be rotating our shifts for Mr. Weasley. Foster is one of the best, I assure you."

"That answers my next question. Alright, so if something were to happen here how long until more Aurors show up?"

"Well, we have these communication rings that, when pressed, calls for back up. I can have a fleet here in two seconds flat." He showed her a black banded ring on his right thumb that had a red oval shaped gem encased in the middle. "When I press it, it shows up green and my team is alerted at once."

She gazed at the magical object in obvious curiosity, filing the information away for future studying, then looked back up at Auror Thestle and nodded. "Very impressive, but is it possible to make it one second flat?"

His stony expression cracked as he smirked and said, "I like you. Yes, I suppose that could be arranged."

"I like you, too. When Auror Foster arrives can you please inform me so that I am certain you know it is actually him and not an imposter?"

He nodded at once. "I most certainly can, Miss Granger. Is there anything else?"

"I think that about covers it," Hermione said, feeling less apprehensive than she had all day. "Thank you very much for your time."

They both nodded at each other respectfully and he replied, "Anytime, Miss Granger."

Back at Ron's bedside, Hermione slipped her trainers off and slowly kneeled on the thin mattress, her weight shifting Ron only slightly. She cast a warming charm around them and took a deep breath, trying her best to steady her nerves for what she was about to do and see. As carefully as she could, Hermione pulled the quilt and white sheet down bit by bit until his entire body was exposed. She stifled a gasp and covered her mouth with one hand, unable to look away.

Both of Ron's legs were wrapped in white gauze from knee to calf, obviously swollen from the shattered bones inside. He was wearing a hospital gown that reached just above his knees and when Hermione lifted it with trembling fingers she saw a fresh pair of pants covering his privates. Further up and on the opposite side from where she sat Ron's side was bandaged in the same white gauze, covering his broken ribs.

"Oh, Ron," she croaked and let the gown fall back down on to his body, but not before she saw the bruises along his chest and stomach that couldn't be healed as quickly as the ones on his face, most likely being the cause for the rupturing to his liver and spleen. She covered her face with her hands and squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head and repeating to herself once more:  _He's not dead, he's only sleeping. Be thankful he's alive._

Hermione pulled herself together and grabbed the quilt and sheet to cover him in the same manner as Molly. Then she lay down on top of the covers and settled on her side facing him. It didn't feel natural to not him look at her the way that he does when they were in bed together, making her smile before he would kiss her head and tell her to go to sleep already. Then they would talk anyway until they both fell asleep in each other's arms.

However, that was before she lied to him and everything became complicated and tense between them. The row in the alleyway before the attack had been pushed to the back of her mind since the attack, but now, as she stared at his motionless profile, it all came back to her. The way he looked at her, angry and hurt, when he saw her injured lip; the way he called her mental and how desperately he wanted to talk with her. And his face when she just stormed off, leaving him there in the rain.

She inched closer to Ron's side and rested her chin on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Ron," she whispered with her mouth as close to his ear as she could manage. "I shouldn't have walked away. I was so wrong. You only wanted to help and I…" She quickly wiped her nose with the back of her hand and sniffled before continuing, "and I – I wanted you to help me, but I was embarrassed. And scared about what it all meant and why it even happened. I'm so scared… about everything."

She raised her head slightly to look at his sleeping face; his expression was unchanged so she settled back down again, her hand holding his bicep, rubbing her thumb along his now warm skin.

"But no matter how scared I am, or how bad it gets, I will always be here," she continued and willed herself not to cry. She lost the battle almost immediately after that thought and cried silently. But she couldn't stop herself from talking, needing to let everything out, even if he couldn't hear her.

"I would never have forgiven myself if you had- if you had left me. If you had died…oh god." She squeezed his arm once and sucked in a breath to keep talking. "There wouldn't be a reason for anything if I lost you, Ron. Every day would be a miserable excuse to exist if you weren't here. If I couldn't see you or talk to you… I'm terrified to think what that would do to me, Ron. Do you understand how much I love you?" She chuckled suddenly through her sobs. "It is quite pathetic, honestly, what you reduce me to."

Hermione slid closer to him, careful to keep her legs away from his bandaged and broken bones and closed her eyes, kissing his shoulder and neck. Then she propped herself up on one elbow and leaned over to kiss his full lips, lingering until they turned from cool to warm, just as they should be.

Then she tucked her head back into his neck again, chin on shoulder, and resigned herself to a restless and sleepless night.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

_Bloody hell, I… I'm dead,_  Ron thought as soon he awoke from his prolonged slumber, before the black darkness slowly turned to a dim gray. He felt something solid move against his arm and looked down to see Hermione laying there beside him, tucked into a ball on her side with her forehead pressed into his shoulder. Ron's confusion was taken over by joy as he watched Hermione's shoulder rise and fall with each breath, knowing that they were both alive.

"Hermione," Ron said, his voice cracking with relief. His breath hitched as her eyelashes fluttered then opened, blinking slowly at the sound of his raspy voice.

"Ron?" Hermione whispered and Ron smiled as she sat up and rubbed her eyes, hairs sticking to the side of her face, and then he smiled wider at the sight of his favorite shirt covering her chest. She smiled back at him dreamily before her eyes opened wide in shock. "Ron! You're awake!" she exclaimed then did a sort of reaching motion with her arms, stopping midway before she could touch him, and withdrawing her arms as if she was about to dive into a pit of fire.

"Whatsa matter?" Ron asked and frowned at his slurred speech and Hermione's now anxious expression.

"Oh, Ron," Hermione moaned and bit her lip, fighting back tears. "You're in hospital." She paused as Ron glanced around his surroundings, quickly taking in that he was indeed lying on a bed in a hospital room. His last memory was of him and Harry in the alleyway, trying to escape inside The Leaky Cauldron by climbing over a balcony; a balcony that he fell off of… and then nothing. He couldn't remember the rest, but guessed that he must've gotten hurt somehow to be in the hospital. Ron turned back to Hermione who was now crying freely, sniffling into her hand and taking deep breaths between trying to talk.

"You- and your- but it's going to be okay. And I- I'll-"

"Blimey, Hermione," Ron said softly to interrupt her nonsensical rambling. "Come here," he said and tried to sit up to comfort her, but felt something pop inside his right elbow, making his arm go slack, and his entire right side felt bruised and unyielding. He yelled out in pain and fell onto his back with a thud, breathing hard, and looked down in shock to see that half his arm was wrapped in a thick white bandage.

Hermione placed her trembling hands back on his chest, her face full of panic and concern, and said frantically, "No, d-don't move. I- I'll get someone, alright?"

"No," Ron said quickly and grabbed her hand before she could leave the bed. Then he took a deep breath as the pain leveled out to a dull ache and said more calmly, "No, I'd rather you tell me what the hell is going on first. Please. And quit looking at me like I'm gonna burst into flames, for fuck's sake."

Hermione let out a choked laugh and shook her head as she wiped her tears. "Oh, Ron, I've missed you."

"Missed me?"

"You were sleeping for the past two days and-"

"I was in a… coma?"

"Oh, no! They just had you in a deep sleep until… the worst of it was over."

Ron gulped and almost hated having to ask his next question. "Before I freak the hell out I need you to tell me what's wrong with me. And why do my legs feel like they're the size of hippogriffs? I can't bloody feel them!"

He saw Hermione glance down at his legs and her eyebrows knitted even closer together before she took a deep breath and explained everything that the Healer told her about his injuries, what potions he would have to take and how long they expect until he would be fully recovered. She also told him, without having to be asked, what happened inside The Leaky Cauldron with her and Ginny and then when Harry joined them, up until they arrived at the hospital.

"Bloody fucking hell, this is so fucked up," Ron said then he turned his head to look up at the ceiling, letting everything Hermione just told him sink in. "And they caught Watler and the others, right?" he asked stiffly, trying his best not to let his anger towards them make his heart race any more than it already was.

"Yes," Hermione said and squeezed his hand in hers."From what I understand they're still questioning him and everyone else involved. Thanks to George getting the word out they were able to capture at least a dozen Deatheaters." She took a shuddering breath and said, "Everyone keeps telling me how lucky we are. It doesn't exactly feel that way, does it?" Ron could hear the shakiness in her voice and when he looked over his heart clenched at the sight of her looking down at their hands with her bottom lip trembling. "I almost lost you, Ron. It was horrible, seeing you lying there in all that blood… and after we had that row and… I don't know what I would've done if –if you had-"

"Hey, stop that," Ron said and uncurled his fingers from hers and stroked her cheek as he swallowed the urge to break down himself. He wanted nothing more than to scream at the top of his lungs and break every damn thing in the room. He wanted to be there when they questioned those Deatheaters who dared to fuck with his family, Harry and Hermione included, yet again. His growing hatred and quickly descending patience was starting to win out. But he paused and forced himself to stare back into Hermione's fearful eyes and knew that the most important thing right now was right in front of him. Nothing else mattered except wiping that terrified and miserable look off of Hermione's face.

"We were lucky, Hermione. And you didn't lose me," Ron continued as he took her hand again. "And you were so brave and I'm so bloody proud and thankful that Ginny was with you." He gestured toward his legs and tried not to show how horrified he actually was, for her sake. "And… I know it looks bad now, but it can only get better, yeah?"

"Yes, I know. I'm trying so hard to be strong for you. I really am," she said and wiped at her eyes before shaking her head as if to clear it. "Sorry."

Ron peered at her, wondering why she still insisted on putting up a front with him. Didn't she realize that he could see through all of that shite by now? "Hermione, you don't have to be anything with me, you know that. Bloody hell, just… be with me, you know? That's enough."

She let out a sob and shook her head. "No, Ron, it's not enough. I have to do more for you. The way I've been… the things I've said… it isn't right. I told myself I wouldn't do this and here I am blubbering on when I should be trying to make you feel better. I'm so s-sorry."

Ron's brain felt like it was pounding against his skull with the most intense headache he'd ever experienced. He couldn't move his legs, and most of his body in fact, because of the potions and the bandages, but he could still feel the dull but steady pain from the bones slowly trying to mend themselves. However, listening to Hermione say that she isn't enough for him and apologizing for it was more painful than all the broken bones in his body.

"Hermione, what are you on about?" He shook her hand to stop her from talking and closed his eyes briefly as a wave of nausea suddenly swept over him, making him feel dizzy. His hand tightened around hers, making her yelp in surprise.

"Oh my god, are you alright? I've upset you, haven't I? You might need a potion or something. I'll go-"

"Fucking hell, Hermione, stop!"

He snapped his eyes open when his head stopped spinning and saw Hermione watching him, her big brown eyes wide with worry. "I-I'm sorry," she said quietly as he continued to stare at her.

"Don't be," Ron sighed and couldn't help but close his eyes as the pounding in his head moved to the front of his face and the dull ache throughout his body was slowly become less… dull. "I am. I shouldn't've yelled at you like that."

"Ron, you need something for the pain, I can get-"

"No, just give me a second." He pulled his hand out from hers and used it to pinch the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut.

"Ron, you're shaking!" Hermione exclaimed from beside him then sighed with frustration. "This is ridiculous. I'll be right back." He felt the bed dip as she stood up and a moan escaped his mouth as the movement caused his body to shift and his broken ribs to grate against each other.

"No, don't go," Ron managed to say then gasped as a new pain shot up his left thigh up to his hip, causing him to spasm and then cry out once more from the involuntary movement. He heard Hermione's shuffling feet on the floor as she hurried over to his side of the bed.

"Ron," she said quietly. Her voice sounded so much calmer and stronger than a moment ago that Ron took a deep breath and held it so that he could hear what she had to say. "It's almost midnight and that's usually when you get your potions anyway. I'm only going to stick my head out the door and find Healer Smeltling, alright? Just… stay calm."

With his eyes still closed, Ron was using all of his strength to concentrate on keeping his body perfectly still, not wanting to make any sudden movements. However, the effort was making him shake uncontrollably, and a low groan sounded from deep in his throat.

"Ron, please try to relax," Hermione said in a more desperate tone and placed a warm and sweaty hand on his forehead. He felt the shaking slow down and although the pain was still ascending, he felt his body relax enough for his eyes to unclench. He peered at Hermione and saw her smile at him with relief and pride.

"That's better," she said and leaned over to kiss him quickly on his forehead where her hand had just been. Ron couldn't speak, but he gave her a small nod when she pulled away. And then she was gone from his vision and he tried not to let his nerves and the pain get a hold of him again.

"Healer Smeltling! I need you in here now! ... Please!" Ron couldn't help but jump in surprise and hiss in pain when he heard Hermione shout, her voice so loud that he was sure the entire St. Mungos heard her. And then just as suddenly Hermione was back at his side. "She's coming. I think I might have startled her," Hermione said breathlessly then ran her fingers through his hair. The soothing feel of her hand on his scalp was brilliant, but did nothing for the pain that was becoming worse by the minute. Where the hell was that bloody Healer?

"I'm so sorry! I was supposed to be here fifteen minutes ago, but the patient in room 400… well, that's not the point. I have your potions right here, Mr. Weasley. Just sit tight." Ron could only guess that this was Healer Smeltling because his eyes were closed against a new wave of shooting pains all over his body. "Hermione, would you like to help me?" the Healer asked as Ron heard the clattering sound of metal on glass raking across his brain.

"Um, yes. Sure," Hermione stammered and left Ron's side to join the Healer. They talked quickly and quietly, but Ron wasn't paying attention until Hermione came back and placed her hand back on his forehead.

"Ron, open your mouth," she said in a nervous voice. He could hear the Healer giving Hermione instructions as he opened his mouth, almost spitting out the ghastly tasting potion as it hit the back of his throat. "Sorry, I know it's horrible," Hermione groaned then stepped away for a moment before coming back with another vial of potion. "Just a few more, I promise," she said as she continued to take the vials from the Healer and administer them to Ron herself. "I can't believe she's letting me do this," Hermione muttered so only Ron could hear. He detected a hint of excitement in her voice and would have teased her or laughed if he didn't feel like his body was literally being torn apart and put back together again.

"Last one," Hermione said and tipped the vial into his mouth. He drank it down and stuck his tongue out in disgust as that was the worst one of all. But Ron could already feel a change as his muscles were starting to relax and the shooting pain became less pronounced and more localized to the injured areas of his body: his thighs, chest, stomach and right arm.

"Thanks," Ron croaked out as Hermione started to smooth his sweaty hair back from his forehead. He smiled up at her and was about to tell her how bloody fantastic she was taking care of him when she pulled back slightly and gave him a watery smile.

"I –I have to use the loo, excuse me," she said and walked briskly to the other side of the room and into the loo, closing the door quietly behind her. Ron stared at the closed door, utterly confused at her abrupt change in behavior.

"Poor girl, she's got it bad for you, doesn't she?"

Ron whipped his head around toward the voice and saw a young, tall blonde witch wearing Healer's robes leaning against a metal cart and scribbling with a quill on a clipboard. Healer Smeltling looked up at Ron and smiled before looking back down at the clipboard and making more notes.

"Er, yeah," Ron said awkwardly and glanced back at the door to the loo, hearing water running behind it. Then he looked back at Healer Smeltling and watched as she finished writing and was organizing her cart of empty vials. "How is she, really? Do you know?" he asked.

Smeltling looked at Ron curiously then glanced at the loo door before speaking in a low voice. "I'm not a Mind Healer, Mr. Weasley. I don't think I can answer that question," she said shaking her head. Ron was about to reply when she continued, "But I can tell you that Hermione has not left your side not once since I've met her. I reckon she's a bit overwhelmed right now, obviously, but from what I can tell… she's trying her best. Just… let her take care of you. That might be what's best for her and ultimately what is best for  _you_ , which is my main concern." She said the last sentence pointedly and then smiled warmly at him.

"Yeah, I reckon you're right," Ron said and yawned, suddenly feeling very fatigued. "Thanks for, you know, caring and stuff. Blimey, I don't know what I'm saying," he said and stifled another yawn as his eyes blinked very slowly.

"The effects of the potions are beginning to take over. You will be asleep within minutes, I'm sure. Get plenty of rest, Mr. Weasley," Smeltling said kindly and patted his shoulder lightly. "Your mother will be here in the morning." Ron groaned, making her laugh softly as they both knew that no rest would prepare him for the overabundance of doting that she will be setting on her son upon arrival.

"Thanks for the heads up," Ron said with a lazy smile just as the door to the loo opened and Hermione came out, still dressed in Ron's shirt, but her hair hanging in damp ringlets around her face. Ron's smile faded as their eyes settled on each other and there was an unmistakable tension between them that made certain parts of Ron's body not so relaxed. As he watched her shift on her feet, Ron was reminded of the time they spent at her house alone when she had walked into her room from the loo, looking much the same way, only in much less clothing than she was wearing now.

"I'll be back in a few hours," Smeltling said with humor in her voice as neither Ron nor Hermione turned to see her leave.

"You took a shower?" Ron asked as Hermione made her way toward the bed and sat gingerly on the edge until she was settled next to him and he could only see the back of her head, her long wet hair in tangles down her back.

She brought her knees up slowly and tucked them under her chin, turning her head to look sideways at him. "Yeah, sorry I sort of bolted like that."

"No," Ron said quickly and covered his mouth with his hand as he yawned yet again. "No worries. That was right fucking scary, though."

Hermione looked away from him and stared straight ahead, rubbing her hands up and down her pajama covered calves. "Yes, it most certainly was."

Even though Ron felt like he could fall asleep at the drop of a hat, he fought it, refusing to give into it before he set things right with her. "Hey," he said and stretched his hand out and pulled on a curly wet lock of hair. "I'm about to pass out here so could you look at me for a second?"

Hermione sighed and carefully turned her body so it was perpendicular to his, leaning on hand on the mattress near his shoulder. He gave her his best smile and when she chuckled quietly and shook her head he knew he must have looked silly, as if he had just drunk about forty firewhiskeys, but he didn't care as he continued talking.

"Hermione, I'm gonna… get better, yeah? Both of us will… I promise," he said, his voice coming out slightly slurred as the potions were now in full effect, swimming inside his veins and working their magic.

Hermione bent down closer, lying on her side with her legs stretched out and her hand propping her head up to look down at him. "Yes, of course, Ron. And you are going to get better; I'm going to make damn sure of it."

Ron grinned at her, happy to see a hint of the old Hermione, and said, "And how're you gonna do that?"

"I'm going to take care of you, don't worry," Hermione said and sniffled as her eyes shined with tears. She ran a finger down his nose, making his eyes slide closed. And when he opened them again he saw her grinning back at him. "You're going to be sick of me by time you're fully healed."

"Nah, I doubt that," Ron said shaking his head and peering at her through his lashes. Then he reached up and tugged on one of her frizzy curls that had dried around her face. "I'm used to you bossing me around."

Hermione let out a choked laugh through her tears before taking his face tenderly in her hands and lowering her head to capture his lips in a soft, but lingering, kiss. He was fast asleep before she even pulled away.


	26. Chapter 26

For Ron, Saturday was barely recognized as it went by so quickly in a flurry of visitors, Healers, and potions. It was the sleep that he remembered most since he seemed to be doing that more often than interacting with anyone who came to see him, thanks to the massive amount of potions he had to take throughout the day, keeping him in what he felt was a constant inebriated state. Twice already he found himself mumbling and then drifting off in mid conversation; first with his parents, Bill and Fleur early on in the morning and then again after lunch while Charlie was retelling everyone what sounded like a hilarious story about him trying to get two dragons to mate, only to find out later that they were both female. Ron would've laughed uproariously if it wasn't for the pain in his abdomen and the foul mood he'd been in since Harry told him bright and early that that morning that Ron's Auror training had been postponed due to his injuries. He didn't even try to put up a fight, but instead tried not to feel resentful when he looked at Hermione whose conflicting emotions of relief and sympathy ran rampant across her face at the news.

If that wasn't enough for Ron to be tense and irritable, he also had to put up with meals consisting of only soups and plain bread, three times a day. This change to his diet seemed to affect his mood more than anything because any time he found himself coherent enough to speak he would beg his mum, Hermione, or basically anyone for bacon, tarts, or sweets, but with no luck. Ron was disappointed, angry, disgruntled, tired, achy and ready to leave. Even Hermione's constant presence by his side, with her hand firmly wrapped around his, did little to pull him out of the rapidly descending funk he seemed to be falling into.

The only positive thing that Ron could possibly think of was that the disgusting potions he had to chug down all day seemed to be doing their job rather quickly for only two days worth of doses. Although his mind was muddled down by the medicines he was now able to feel his toes and knees, and sit up properly in bed with some help. Hermione was beside herself when she saw these improvements, but still – on Healer's orders – refused him the scones that his own mum had made them; not even after he grumbled that his mum would've let him have just one bite. Ron decided that even though Healer Smeltling was right in her advice to let Hermione help him for her sake, he would most likely throttle her if she fluffed another pillow or made him wear and extra pair of socks because it was 'dreadfully cold' in there. Unfortunately, Ron was blazing hot under the sheets and quilt that his mum had brought over from his bed at the Burrow, but he didn't have the heart to tell her. In fact, they hadn't talked much about anything other than her asking if he was in pain or the recent developments on the attack in Diagon Alley.

This was mostly due to the fact that they weren't alone for more than five minutes at a time, and anyone who visited wanted details on the incident, including Kingsley who took Ron's statement; he also gave them the latest news, that they were able to hold Watler and several others after they confessed to being part of the attack, and hearings would be held in a few weeks time. The tests on the red ball contraption that exploded in the alleyway beside The Leaky Cauldron weren't complete. However, they confirmed without a doubt that whoever made it was also responsible for the one that blasted Hermione's parents' kitchen apart only weeks earlier.

So, when Ron awoke from what felt like his thirtieth blasted nap of the day, he didn't immediately open his eyes, knowing that when he did, he would make his alertness known and that would only provoke another round of potions; a ritual that he was starting to refer to in his head as 'Make-Ron-Loopy-as-Fuck' time.

Instead, Ron focused on his breathing in order to feign sleeping and to keep a straight face. He could feel Hermione sitting up in bed next him; his left arm was warm from being tucked inside her elbow, and his hand was clasped tightly in hers on her lap. She flexed her fingers around his as she talked and he fought the urge to squeeze back. He peeked through his lashes at the clock across the room and saw that it was near four o'clock in the evening, and thanked Merlin that at least his perfect vision wasn't lost in the explosion.

"…combination of muggle science and magic. It's actually quite brilliant." Harry's voice caught Ron's attention and he shut his eyes to listen.

"Harry, I wouldn't exactly say that," Hermione whispered from beside Ron and he could feel her tense up.

"I don't mean it as a compliment, Hermione, you know that," Harry said then lowered his voice. "But even you have to admit that the amount of work that went into it, and the way it works - to be able to effect a specific area… well, it's genius. Bloody dangerous, but clever, yeah?"

Hermione seemed to be mulling this over and Ron was startled when he heard his sister's voice chime in.

"Well, I don't think that it's genius at all," Ginny's voice cut in loudly, making Hermione hiss at her to be quiet. Ron kept his face passive as he knew Hermione was probably staring down at him to see if he was awake. He wanted to join their conversation, but for the first time in two days his mind was clear enough to allow for thought and reason, and he didn't want to go back to feeling like a vegetable, at least not yet. Ron heard Ginny apologize and had to strain his ears to hear her as she continued, "Harry, wizards have been taking muggle objects and using magic on them for centuries. Just ask my dad. He makes a living off these barmy people."

"Yes, that's true, but this time those barmy people," Hermione interrupted, "were highly dangerous Deatheaters with an axe to grind." She blew out a breath and Ron could feel her looking at him before she spoke again. "But you're right, Harry, it is very advanced magic and the way you described it sounds like the same object used in my parents' kitchen. What did you say they called it again?"

Harry cleared his throat and said lowly, "The Detonator."

Then Ginny said something straight from Ron's own thoughts: "Genius, my arse," she snorted. "I mean, really?  _The Detonator_? It sounds like one of those muggle movies you told me about, Harry, where they-"

"Blow up buildings and kill people?" Harry said hotly. "Yeah, seems appropriately named to me."

Ginny muttered that he had a point and then the three of them fell into a silence. Hermione started rubbing her thumb over his knuckles and Ron was about to "wake up" when he heard Ginny sigh heavily.

"I missed seeing him this morning," Ginny said wistfully. His mum had insisted that Ginny stay home with George and Percy to rest after her ordeal the day before. Ron wasn't surprised that she had wrangled herself away from the house to come visit. "He must've been shocked when he first woke up, in hospital, and like… this. How- how was he last night?"

Her voice reminded Ron of when they were younger and she didn't want their parents and brothers to know she was scared of the thunderstorm raging outside, and she would sneak into his room to wake him, asking to keep her company until the storm passed. Ron would yawn all night as they played wizard's chess on his floor and whispered stories they would usually reserve for their rooftop excursions. It was hearing that voice again which made Ron realize, not for the first time, just how dire his situation actually was. And now that he was more alert, he suddenly wanted the potions to help make him forget again.

"Why don't you ask him?" Harry said, not bothering to whisper. "Oi, Ron, how're you feeling, mate? I know you're awake. I can see your nose twitching from over here."

"Sodding hell," Ron groaned and opened his eyes to see Hermione turn to look at him. Her hair was tied back into a messy plait and she was wearing a pink striped jumper with jeans. She looked tired, but more alert than she had all morning. Her face broke into a smile and in that moment Ron forgot all about potions and tasteless food.

"Ron, you're awake," Hermione said and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. He smiled against her mouth and lifted his head when she started to pull away. She giggled softly and kissed him again, then pulled back slightly to whisper, "You should've said something. Are you feeling alright?" Her face was still only inches away and Ron couldn't think of a single thing to complain about.

"Yeah, s'alright," he said, which seemed to satisfy Hermione as her smile widened. Then she pressed her forehead to his, closed her eyes and exhaled; a small whimper escaped as she breathed on Ron's face. He could feel all of the anxiety and fear that she'd pushed down in favor of taking care of him seep out of her, as if she were allowing herself that moment to let him know that she still needed him. He reached one hand behind her neck and pulled her in for another kiss.

"Sorry," she whispered, shaking her head as if she had let something slip.

"Hey," Ron whispered, not wanting harry or Ginny to hear him. "Thanks."

"For what?"

"For not trying to hide anything just now. I may be laid up in bed and barmy from potions and whatever the hell else, but I'm still here for you. Okay?"

Hermione smiled at Ron's frankness and nodded once with an air of finality. "Right, we take care of each other."

Ron grinned and dropped his voice even lower, making Hermione lean in even closer to hear him. "Just so you know, there's one bone that wasn't broken that I'd love for you to take care of."

Ron smiled smugly as Hermione sat up straight, her face red, and started coughing and sputtering. She cleared her throat then bit her lip and said, "Oh, my god, Ron. You're so-"

"Please, don't finish that," Harry called out.

Hermione spun around and glared at Harry. "I was going to say incorrigible. Why? What did you think I was going to say?"

Harry put both of his hands up and Hermione turned back to Ron with a triumphant look on her face. Ron had to try hard not to laugh as his upper body was starting to feel quite sore.

"Oh, Hermione, let the man breathe. I swear, you two act as if you weren't joined at the hip for the past twenty-four hours," Ginny said with a chuckle as she stood up and walked over to Ron's bedside. She looked the same as always, with her red hair hanging straight down her back, and dressed casually in jeans and a faded, plain green t-shirt. Most importantly she was alive and didn't look injured at all, thank Merlin.

"Hey, Ron."

He waited, expecting her to crack a joke, or maybe say something sarcastic to Hermione about her hovering that could rival their mum's, but when he saw Ginny's face he knew he should have known better. He should have known from the way she spoke earlier that her face would match that little girl who would wake him at night because she was frightened. It was a face only he knew and he could tell she was thinking the same thing because her chin started trembling and her eyes suddenly watered as they stared at each other.

"Hey, Gin," Ron said, his throat feeling scratchy. "You okay?"

"Don't be stupid. I'm fine," Ginny said, rolling her eyes while swiping at them quickly with the back of her hand. "You scared the shit out of everyone, you know."

"Yeah, sorry 'bout that," Ron said, trying to make Ginny smile, which she did, albeit sadly. Harry came to stand next to her and Ron narrowed his eyes at him, asking if Ginny really was alright. Harry nodded once then wrapped an arm around her waist.

"You look better than you did this morning," Harry said to Ron, then grinned. "I mean you still look like shite, only less… pissed. You know, because of all the slurring…"

"Fuck off, Harry," Ron said with a smirk. The tension between them in the alleyway felt like it was ages ago as they find themselves on the other side of yet another traumatic event together, both still alive. But Ron knew they still needed to talk. He didn't owe Harry an explanation about what was going on between his and Hermione's relationship, but Harry was his best mate – no, more like his brother – and Hermione's as well. He wanted to confide in him and ask his advice, which meant talking about Hermione's issues; something he would have to talk over with her first. Just thinking about talking gave Ron a headache.

"Well, that's just one of the side effects of the potions, Harry," Hermione said without a hint of sarcasm, in response to Ron's previously inebriated state that morning. "If you were the one taking several potions to ease the pain, keep your organs from failing and your bones together then you too would sound as if you'd chugged about a gallon of firewhiskey, am I right?"

Shocked by Hermione's outburst, Ron glanced at Harry who merely opened his mouth then shut it, at a loss for words, then back at Hermione.

"Hermione, he was only-"

"I know," Hermione muttered quickly. "I just keep thinking…and then it hits me that you almost- you could have-" She stopped talking and shook her head, rubbing her brow furiously.

Harry came forward to help Ron as he struggled to sit up and then secured the top half of the bed to stay upright. Ron gritted his teeth, ignoring the pain that pressed down on his legs and ribs as he leaned over and started rubbing her back to calm her down. He didn't know what to say, but his touch seemed to wake her out of whatever thoughts were running through her mind because she suddenly looked up and grimaced at Harry and Ginny.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you like that, Harry."

"Don't worry about it," Harry said with a shrug. "I reckon we're all a bit wound up."

Hermione put a hand to her chest and nodded. "I am still a bit shaken from yesterday."

"We all are," Ron said, and Ginny agreed, but he wasn't sure any of it was getting through to Hermione. She smiled at him, but it was false and his heart clenched at the sadness behind her expression. Then she shook her head and looked at her watch, and her eyes opening wide.

"Oh, it's almost time for your potions, Ron," Hermione said suddenly and started to stand up.

"What? Now?" Ron asked, surprised at the sudden change of subject, and the fact that it turned to something he dreaded made him feel resentful and bitter all over again. "Can't it wait? I wanted to ask-"

"No scones," Hermione said as she slipped her feet into her slippers.

Ginny snickered and Ron rolled his eyes. "Shut it, Ginny. I was going to say that I wanted to talk about what the bloody hell's been going on while I've been drugged to sleep all day."

"Like I told Harry," Hermione said, "it's just a side effect. You're going to have to learn to deal with it."

"I hate those stupid potions," Ron muttered. He knew he sounded like a sulky child, but he couldn't help it. He was also hoping to garner more sympathy from Hermione, but she was having none of it. However, her face did soften a bit as she leaned over and placed her palm on his forehead.

"You're a bit warm," she said.

"Probably from all the socks and bloody blankets," Ron mumbled.

"And I know you're in pain," Hermione said, ignoring his last statement, and stood back to stare at him, challenging him to tell her differently.

"I reckon, maybe a bit," Ron sighed and rolled his eyes. "Fine, get the damn potions."

"Well, come on then," Ginny said and walked around the bed. She took Hermione's hand and started to pull her toward the door. "I'll go with you. Harry can fill Ron in on everything while we're gone."

"Wait," Hermione said and stopped mid-stride. "I just have to... grab something." She walked back to the bed and grabbed her bag from the armchair.

"What do you need that for?" Ron asked, eyeing the bag curiously.

"Force of habit, I suppose," Hermione said as she slung it over her shoulder and shrugged. "I'll be right back with Smeltling and your potions. Harry, don't let him have any scones, I mean it."

Harry glanced at Ron who simply pouted and grunted his disagreement.

"Sure thing, Hermione," Harry said with barely suppressed grin.

When the girls were gone Harry started to say something, but Ron stopped him by raising one finger for him to wait.

"What is going on?" Harry asked.

"Alright, look," Ron whispered urgently, "I need you to do me a favor, but you can't tell Hermione."

"I dunno, she-"

"It's nothing serious. Bloody hell, we don't have much time."

"Okay, okay. What is it?"

"I need you to take off my socks and two bedsheets out from under this quilt, and get rid of them. Burn them if you have to."

Harry stood there, staring at Ron with one brow up, trying to decide if Ron was serious or not. "You're joking."

"Come on, Harry. Don't look at me like that. You know how Hermione is. She's got it in her head that it's wicked cold in here and she won't hear any different. I'm sweating my bollocks off under here," Ron said impatiently.

"Spare me the details, will you," Harry said as he moved to the foot of the bed, shaking his head, and grabbed hold of the white hospital sheets that were underneath Ron's quilt. Ron held the quilt in place as Harry yanked the sweat inducing layers out from the tops of Ron's legs.

"Oh, fucking hell," Ron groaned and smiled. "Thank, mate. Now, my socks."

Harry chuckled as he vanished the bedding and grabbed hold of Ron's left foot. "So anyway, there isn't any more news than there was this morning." Ron felt him carefully tugging the two layers of thick socks off of his foot and groaned as the pain in his thigh escalated with every pull.

"Sorry, " Harry said when he finally bared Ron's pale and sweaty foot. "Well, that's attractive."

"Go on," Ron said through clenched teeth. As much as it hurt for Harry to pull on his legs, he would rather endure it than go another twelve hours sleeping inside an oven.

"Yeah, the only news was about the Detonator, but you already heard about that while you were  _sleeping_ ," Harry said with a pointed look and freed his other foot.

It wasn't much, and even though his thighs felt like they were on fire, feeling the air between his toes made Ron feel like he was on cloud nine.

"Can I ask you a… personal question?"

Ron peered at Harry who looked a bit uncomfortable. "Yeah, sure," he said carefully.

"How do you, you know, use the toilet?"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah," Harry said and looked thoughtful. "I mean, is it a spell or do you have someone help you? Is there a catheter?"

"A cathe-what?"

"It's a tube that goes- Never mind. So I'm guessing it's a spell then," Harry said.

"Yeah, it's a spell," Ron muttered. "The Healer showed Hermione and Mum how to do it since I can't use magic for a while, which is complete bollocks." He looked up at Harry and scowled. "Do you know how humiliating it is to tell your mum or your girlfriend that you need them to empty your bladder or… bloody hell I can't even say it."

"Well, I reckon I can learn it. I mean, it's only a spell. How hard can it be?" Harry said and scratched his head. "It's the least I can do after what happened yesterday… Ron,I -"

"Yeah, I know, but… can we talk about all that at home? This place is depressing enough without us trying to muck our way through that conversation," Ron said and Harry nodded just as the door opened.

"Well, look who's awake and bright-eyed," Smeltling's voice sang out as she pushed her cart of potions further into the room.

Ron sighed and felt a wave of apprehension as 'Make-Ron-Loopy-as-Fuck' time was once again upon him.

"Is all that really necessary? I'm only just getting my senses back," Ron moaned.

"Along with more pain and you don't want to know what else that will follow if you don't take these," Smeltling said then smiled warmly at him. "One more day and you'll be out of here, don't worry." He tried to smile back, but knew it only came out as a grimace, and he couldn't seem to care at the moment.

"Not soon enough," he muttered then added quickly, "No offense or anything."

Smeltling only chuckled and said, "You're not the only one to say that."

Harry suddenly stepped to the front of the bed and stealthily covered Ron's bare feet with the quilt just as Hermione walked into the room. She stopped and stared at Harry who was standing awkwardly by Ron's feet, trying to cover a part of his foot that wasn't covered from her eyes.

"What are you doing?" Hermione said, eyeing Harry suspiciously. Ron rolled his eyes and cursed under his breath. If Harry blew this for him he'd have to sleep with three bloody pairs of socks this time.

"Nothing," he replied nonchalantly then smiled gratefully at Ginny who was the last one to enter. However, she didn't notice as she was staring at the floor, deep in thought and had a frown on her face.

"What's wrong?" Harry asked and Ginny looked up at him, startled. She glanced at Hermione and then both of them shook their heads.

Their voices chorused together into one word: "Nothing."

Hermione looked flushed, but was smiling as she tossed her bag on the chair and walked to Ron's bedside to help Healer Smeltling with the potions.

"Well, visiting hours are almost over and we promised Mum we'd be home by now, so we should go," Ginny said and walked over to grab Harry's hand.

"What's the rush?" Ron asked then noticed a tension between the two girls that made him feel uneasy. "What's going on?"

"Yeah, there's something going on with you two," Harry added.

Hermione huffed and turned her back to help Smeltling with the potions. "We said nothing. Why do you insist there is something when there is clearly nothing?"

"Bullshit," Ron said.

"Just let it go," Ginny said impatiently. "What time are you getting out of here tomorrow anyway, Ron?"

"Noon, and not a minute later," Ron said anxiously, his mind already starting to daydream about his mum's cooking and his own cool bed and pajamas.

"Brilliant," Ginny said. "We'll see you in the morning then."

"Er, alright," Ron said, thoroughly confused.

They said their good-byes and after he was given his potions and Healer Smeltling was gone it was only him and Hermione in the room, finally alone after a long and exhausting day.

As Ron surrendered to the potions' effects and felt his body start to relax, he watched Hermione move around the room, cleaning up little messes as she chewed on a biscuit and avoided Ron's stare.

"Hermione."

"Yes?" She dropped some rubbish in a bin and walked to the bed. "What's wrong? Are you feeling alright?"

"No," he said and rolled his head on the pillow, trying to stay awake. "You look upset. What's it, Hermione? We promised… remember?"

She hesitated, and then sighed. "Ginny's upset with me. She and I were talking about school..."

"Oh, yeah," Ron murmured, sifting through his hazy brain for more information. "You leave in… ten days, right?"

Hermione shifted on her feet and averted her eyes again to look away from him.

"Hermione, why was Ginny upset? And what does it have to do with Hogwarts?"

Hermione finally looked at him and Ron's heart sank as he suddenly had an idea what this was about.

"I- I told her I wasn't going back."

XXXXX


	27. Chapter 27

Hermione was walking beside Ginny toward the Healer's station at the end of the corridor in silence. She had a feeling that Ginny wanted to come along in order to question her about something, but all Hermione could think about was Ron, in pain, and how fast her heart was beating…

The silence didn't last long as Hermione's suspicions were realized and Ginny spoke up after they reached the station and asked for Healer Smeltling.

"This is not how I imagined our last week of summer to be like, did you?" Ginny asked as she leaned back against the counter and crossed her arms.

"Last week… Oh, right," Hermione said and nodded her head, suddenly coming to the realization that there were only ten days left until the start of term; until she and Ginny were supposed to board the Hogwarts Express… and leave.

"You are planning on going back, aren't you?" Ginny asked as she stood upright and peered into Hermione's face. It was as if she could read Hermione's mind, or at least her face as she wore a pained and conflicted expression that was quite obvious to anyone who knew her. "Oh, Hermione…"

"Don't look at me like that, Ginny," Hermione groaned. "I completely forgot about Hogwarts with everything going on. And with Ron… this changes things a bit, doesn't it?"

"Well-"

"Hello, ladies," Healer Smeltling's voice sounded from behind them and they both turned, startled. "Sorry to interrupt, and also for being late… again," the Healer spoke as she pushed her cart ahead of them.

"Oh, it's alright," Hermione said with a smile, grateful for the interruption, and made to follow after her. However, Ginny stopped her with a hand gripping her elbow.

"We'll be right in," Ginny said sweetly to Smeltling who smiled back and gave Hermione a curious look before continuing on without them.

Hermione took her arm out from Ginny's grasp and turned to her younger friend. "What are you doing? I need to get in there."

"The Healer can handle it this one time," Ginny said and walked around Hermione to block her from walking away. "This will only take a moment, Hermione."

"Ginny, I don't know what you want me to say. I don't know what I'm going to do just yet. I'm- I'm just confused is all," she conceded and let out a sigh, feeling a bit of relief at the admission.

"Confused?" Ginny gave her a skeptical look. "Hermione is not one to be confused about… well, anything! Certainly not when it comes to school and learning and all that."

"Oh, right, I forgot," Hermione scoffed and then laughed humorlessly. "Everyone expects me to have it all figured out. I'm supposed to be the level headed one; the clever one with all the answers, aren't I?"

"Well, not lately," Ginny muttered.

"Yes, well," Hermione said quietly, blinking back the tears. "Not lately is right I suppose"

Ginny's face softened and she suddenly looked apologetic. "Oh, I didn't mean… You were brilliant in the Leaky Cauldron. I mean, you saved my life, really. I just meant… I haven't forgotten what happened before the explosion: you and Ron having a row, and you looked so… down. And then there was your fainting a while back and… well, I can tell something's off with you, alright?"

"Well, you don't have to worry about that," Hermione said and sniffed, sticking her chin out. The previous feelings of relief in letting Ginny in had changed to embarrassment and Hermione felt her emotions start to harden. "I'm fine now. And no offense, but this is none of your business, Ginny. If you'll excuse me…" She went to walk around Ginny and felt her bag being pulled, making her stop. "What are you-"

"I don't want you to make a decision you'll regret. I'm only trying to help," Ginny said desperately with her hand on Hermione's bag to prevent her from walking away, making it drop to the floor with a loud thud and scattering items all over the corridor.

"Damn," Hermione murmured and crawled on her hands and knees to retrieve quills, parchment and a few books.

"I'm so sorry," Ginny said and stooped down to help. "I shouldn't've done that."

"Never mind, it was my fault for trying to walk away," Hermione sighed as she stood, shoving her belongings back into her bag. She didn't want to fight with Ginny, but she also didn't want anyone else worrying about her, not when she was finally starting to feel better.

"What's this?" Ginny said sharply and waved a vial, with a small amount of purple liquid inside. in front of Hermione's face.

"Nothing," Hermione said and snatched it away from Ginny, shoving it into her bag that was now a disorganized mess.

"Not nothing," Ginny hissed and quickly pulled Hermione to the side until they were out of earshot. Hermione looked over Ginny's shoulder and noticed Auror Foster, standing guard next to Ron's hospital room door, watching them. "I know what that is," Ginny continued. "After Fred… Mum and Dad took George to a Mind Healer and he was given that stuff for his depression, among other things. He became dependant on it and they had to wean him off. He was in a right state about it."

"How do you know this? Ron's never told me…"

"I overheard Mum and Dad talking about it. They kept it quiet from the rest of us and I never told anyone, until now."

Ginny's expression while talking about her family's loss made Hermione felt her heart leap and she had to swallow the lump in her throat before speaking. "I'm sorry. I don't want to worry you, but I only got it yesterday, from the Healer who took care of Harry and me. It's not a big deal."

"You're right," Ginny whispered and looked around them to make sure no one was listening. "It's not when you take a small amount every day. That vial you have is almost empty!"

"Ginny, please don't worry. It's only temporary until-"

"That potion can be dangerous the way you're taking it, Hermione," Ginny said, ignoring her. "This isn't right."

"No, what isn't right is your assumption that I would do something to harm myself," Hermione snapped and then took a deep breath to calm herself before the conversation escalated and they both said things they would later regret.

Hermione had a feeling that she might have been taking more than was prescribed, but she was under a lot of stress and she told herself that she would not become like George. No, Hermione's denial was more about feeling embarrassed to have someone find out that she even needed it to begin with. And Ginny's skeptical look only made her feel even more defensive.

"I only take a little when I feel overwhelmed or anxious," Hermione continued. "It just so happens that, given the recent events, I've had to use it more often than necessary. That doesn't mean it's dangerous. That's how it was prescribed."

"I don't know," Ginny said slowly shaking her head. "This all feels wrong. Does Ron know?"

"No, but I'll tell him. Please, Ginny. I don't want you to be cross with me, and I with you." Hermione looked Ginny in the eyes and smiled reassuringly. "I promise I'll be careful. I'm… I'm even seeing a Mind Healer."

"Really?"

"Yes, but don't tell Harry. I'll speak to him. Please."

"Okay, but I don't like all these secrets. I've had enough of them to last me quite a while," Ginny said with a huff, and she looked incredibly weary.

"And what about Hogwarts? Are you really not going?"

"Honestly," Hermione shook her head sadly, "I don't know if I can handle it right now."

"But you have to go back."

"Why?" Hermione asked. "Everything I need is right here." She pointed over Ginny's shoulder towards Ron's room.

 _He needs me, more than I need Hogwarts,_  she thought.  _Besides, being away from him, especially the state he's in, will guarantee that I won't be very productive and most likely do poorly in my classes. Yes, if I can avoid failure and at the same time stay with Ron, then I'll just have to figure something else out for my future._

Even as those thoughts ran through her mind, Hermione still felt like she was giving up, as if she were taking the easy route. She wasn't used to the feeling as she always wanted to challenge herself and finish what she started. But she couldn't afford to let that guilt consume her. She had to think of someone other than herself. She had to think of Ron.

"it will be alright, Ginny. Trust me," Hermione said and squeezed Ginny's arm.

Ginny only stared at her, at a loss for words as her eyes darted over Hermione's face, as if trying to figure her out. When Ginny didn't respond right away Hermione turned away from her, unable to take the scrutiny any longer.

"Come on, or they'll start to wonder where we're at," Hermione said over her shoulder as she walked and then entered the room, leaving Ginny in the corridor.

XXXXX

When Hermione and Ron were finally alone she knew he was going to try and question her about the awkwardness that had occured between her and Ginny. Ron was very observant, although she wasn't doing a very good job of hiding her stress over the discussion she just had with his sister. So she busied herself with tidying up, hoping that Ron was too buggered to notice.

But he did notice and when he reminded her of their promise to be honest with one another she decided that she could at least start with half of the truth. So she declared her decision to not return to Hogwarts, not exactly knowing what response she would get from him. Would he be relieved, happy to have her stay with him? Would he feel guilty for being the reason for her putting off school? Or would he be disappointed that she had given up?

Hermione held her breath as she stared at Ron's confused, albeit dazed, expression. She hadn't thought about the fact that he was pumped full of potions and was about a minute away from falling asleep before she blurted out her news.

"Wha… what d'ya mean, not goin'?" Ron asked with his eyes squinted; not only from confusion, but also from heavy fatigue that Hermione knew he was trying desperately to overcome.

"I shouldn't have said anything," Hermione said hastily. "You're knackered. We can talk about this tomorrow."

He closed his eyes, and Hermione sighed gratefully, thinking he had finally dozed off until he squeezed her hand tightly and said, "I know you want… t'stay for me, but," he opened his eyes, "I can't let you do that…"

Hermione sighed. "Ron, I-" She watched as he closed his eyes again and knew that this time he was asleep, his hand now slack in hers and his quiet snores filling the room. "We'll talk tomorrow," Hermione repeated and gave him a soft kiss on his lips.

Truth be told, Hermione was surprised at herself for changing her mind about going back to Hogwarts. She had always thought, even while on the run, that when the opportunity presented itself she would continue her education, and that nothing would stop her. But that was before the love of her life was seriously injured and the overwhelming need to be by his side became intense, more now than ever before. Hermione felt her stomach flip as she thought about the conversation she had with Ginny just moments ago and how awful she was to her. She knew Ginny was only concerned, but that concern only triggered Hermione's instincts to protect herself from that worry, to put up that wall that Ron was always telling her she needed to break down.

Hermione fished around in her bag and closed her hand around the vial containing the remaining dose of calming draught, which only yesterday was full to brim. She unstoppered it and raised it to her lips, but then Ginny's face and words came back to her, about George, and she lowered the vial. If what Ginny said was right then Hermione wanted no part of a potion that could end up making her even worse than she already was. She knew enough about herself that dependency on any kind of substance was not for her.

Breathing rapidly and holding back her tears, Hermione quickly stalked into the bathroom and dumped the rest of the liquid into the sink, shaking the vial of its contents until not one drop remained. She turned on the tap and watched as the violet colored potion diluted itself with the water until it all disappeared down the drain. She felt a fury start to erupt inside of her. She was so angry at herself for letting all of this, her anxiety and inner turmoil, get the best of her.

She clenched her fists and closed her eyes, counting to fifty in her head until she could feel her heart rate slow down and the hammering in her head subside. Blowing out a deep breath, Hermione walked back into the room and glanced at Ron sleeping peacefully and thankfully pain free, before she walked out of the room and into the bright corridor.

She nodded at Auror Foster who reciprocated, but she wasn't there for a chat. She had a hard expression on her face as she walked briskly toward the healer station and waited for someone to speak with her.

"May I help you, Miss Granger?" A short, raven haired woman who Hermione knew as Margy, the evening secretary, approached the desk, raising her brow at Hermione's tapping fingers.

"Sorry," Hermione said with a smile and tucked her hands into her pockets. "I was wondering if I can get a message to a Healer in another department and have a reply by tonight. Is that possible?"

"Is everything alright?" Margy's smile faded. "Does Mr. Weasley need a second opinion?"

"Oh, no. Nothing like that," Hermione said quickly. "This is… personal. For me."

"Oh, well, of course I can help deliver a message," Margy said and pulled a piece of green parchment that Hermione assumed meant fast delivery, from a drawer and a quill. "To whom would you like me to write the message, dear?"

"Oh, can't I write it myself?"

"I'm sorry, Miss Granger. Any interdepartmental owls have to be written by personnel. It's policy and also faster this way."

Hermione hesitated, realizing that she would have to say it out loud and almost backed away from the desk, opting to figure out another solution. But then she remembered Ron's slurred reaction to her not going to school, and Ginny's reaction to the potion, and Hermione knew there must be more that she wasn't able to notice. And to think that she was missing out on important information, especially about herself, was more troublesome than anything else.

"Paula Cobb, please," Hermione said firmly. "I would like to request a meeting for tomorrow morning. As early as she can make it, if possible."


	28. Chapter 28

With eyes shut tight and shoulders stretched to their limit as they bore most of his weight, Ron knew that it was crucial to not let go. He gritted his teeth against the cold, and the intense fear, that suddenly encased his body, and forced his eyes to open. The rain blurred his vision, but he saw Harry standing over him, waving his arms frantically and yelling at him to hurry, not that Ron needed telling as he was well aware of the urgency of the situation. Then Harry was pointing somewhere below Ron, towards the ground; he knew of the ball, the dark object that was hovering underneath him, ready to erupt any second, but there was something else in Harry’s insistence that made Ron look back once more. Gripping the railing of the balcony even tighter to compensate for the shift in weight, he turned his head and looked down. His entire body jolted and he struggled to force words to come out of his mouth, but he couldn’t; his mouth was open, but no sound came out.

There was Hermione, standing in the middle of the alleyway, hair soaked through and plastered to her forehead and neck. She was staring up at him with a smile so calm, yet unnatural that it chilled Ron to the bone, and her body was shaking so badly... But what made him feel the need to shout was what – or rather who – was behind her, approaching at a painstakingly slow pace. Black tattered robes dragged through the growing puddles of rainwater, a pale face framed by a mass of black hair, and a sneer clearly visible; a tongue running over rotting teeth: Bellatrix Lestrange.

Ron woke up with a start and, breathing heavily through his nose, raised his head off of his pillow to take in his surroundings; he was on his back in the same hospital bed in which he had fell asleep in just hours ago. Ron looked quickly to his left and saw the back of Hermione’s head and her shoulder rise and fall with her every breath as she was clearly in a deep sleep.

Ron dropped his head back down and squeezed his eyes shut, groaning quietly. He had a feeling he would be having that same nightmare for a while. And although nothing will replace the recurring nightmares of hearing and seeing Hermione in Bellatrix’s hands at Malfoy Manor, that nightmare had now fused with this new one; there was no escaping that bloody evil woman. Ron sighed and used his free hand to rub his face furiously, hoping to erase the image of that sick witch’s face from his mind.

“Fucking hell,” he muttered and stared at the ceiling for a few moments to calm down before turning to look at Hermione again.

She was curled up on her side, facing away from him, which Ron figured she must’ve done in her sleep. She was covered up to her neck in a white blanket and her hair was in a long plait down her back.  He was about to reach for her when the door opened slowly with a low creak and Ron’s head snapped toward the sound. Healer Smeltling quietly walked into the room and clicked the door shut behind her, then smiled when she noticed Ron was staring at her.

“Mr. Weasley, did I wake you?”

Ron let his breath out and shook his head, trying not to show how shaken he still was from his nightmare.

“No, I was already awake,” Ron whispered back. He noticed as Smeltling walked further into the room that she wasn’t with her usual clattering cart of potions and he almost laughed from relief.

“That’s good because I was going to wake you anyhow. I’ll be quick and as quiet as possible,” she said, nodding her head at Hermione who was still sleeping soundly.

“Oh, right,” Ron said, his eyes turning to Hermione and he smiled when she mumbled something in her sleep and rubbed her face in her pillow. Then he remembered the last thing Hermione had said before he fell asleep and frowned. Something about her not going back o Hogwarts…

“Is there something wrong? Do you need a moment?”

“No,” Ron answered as he pulled his gaze from Hermione’s sleeping back and looked at Smeltling’s concerned face, which made him suddenly feel panicked. “Wait,  _is_  there something wrong? Was there another attack? Is it Ginny? Harry?”

“No, Mr. Weasley,” Smeltling said quickly and held her hands up in front of her. “Nothing like that.”

Ron ran his hand through his hair; he wasn’t sure how many scares he would be able to take in one night.

She conjured a chair from thin air and sat down next to Ron’s bedside with a clipboard in one hand and her wand in the other. Ron wondered what she could possibly want to speak about at – he glanced at the clock on the wall – half past midnight; if she wasn’t there for his dose of wretched potions, then what was going on?

“I wanted to speak with you about your condition as I’ve recently found a new development in your case.”

“A new development? Was I tested for something else?” Ron’s heart started beating rapidly as he remembered her taking his blood that morning. “Oh Merlin, you did… Bloody hell.”

As he thought of all the worst possible causes for Healer Smeltling to have this impromptu meeting with him, he didn’t realize he had sat upright until he felt Hermione stir, her arse bumping his hip. She remained sleeping and for the Ron was glad. If he was going to learn of his demise at such an obscene hour, then he could at least let her rest before she heard the same dreadful news. He rubbed his fingers together and looked back at Smeltling anxiously.

“Don’t try and soften the blow. I can take it,” Ron said as bravely as he could, his voice shaking slightly. He could feel every major moment he had yet to experience start to slip away: becoming an Auror, getting married, and seeing Hermone pregnant with his child…

“How long have I got to live?” he asked and gulped, his eyes never leaving the Healer’s.

“To live?... Oh, no, Mr. Weasley,” Smeltling said, her voice quiet yet high with alarm as she reached out to touch his arm, “You’re not going to die, I assure you. Goodness… It’s quite the opposite, in fact.”

“Bloody hell, you scared me,” Ron muttered and let out a shuddering breath. He lowered his head into his hand, his shoulders shaking with silent laughter.

“I’m sorry for upsetting you. I –“

Suddenly he looked up at her again, his eyes wide with shock. “Wait!” Ron whispered urgently. “I’m sitting up, aren’t I? On my own…”

“Yes, you are,” Smeltling said eagerly. She moved to the edge of her seat and stared at him expectantly. “This is what I wanted to speak with you about... How are you feeling right now, Mr. Weasley?”

Ron asked himself the same question as he surveyed his body, taking in not only the fact that he had sat up on his own – it was only hours ago that he had needed assistance from Harry to be able to do this – but he also realized that he was alert which should’ve meant that, with the lack of potions in his system, he should be feeling a lot more pain, particularly where his liver and spleen were ruptured. He slowly took a deep breath and held his hand against the bottom of his ribcage, expecting to feel the usual ache from his ruptured organs that came along with the alertness, but instead only felt the pain of his broken ribs and legs that were still on the mend.

“Can you tell me how you feel, Mr. Weasley?” Smeltling asked again.

“I… I feel okay I guess,” he said uncertainly and shook his head in awe. “But how? Are my-“

“What’s going on?”

Ron turned his head at the sound of Hermione’s voice and the rustling of bed sheets as she sat up beside Ron, rubbing her eyes of sleep. She yawned and then leaned over to kiss his shoulder.

“Are you alright?” Hermione muttered sleepily against him and looked up at him through half lidded eyes.

“Er, yeah. M’alright,” Ron muttered back and watched her cheeks turn slightly pink. Ron heard Smeltling clear their throat which made Hermione jump and finally notice that there was someone else in the room, sitting on the other side of the bed. For a moment Ron had almost forgotten she was there as soon as he saw Hermione’s face.

“Oh!” Hermione exclaimed and smoothed back her hair, trying to look presentable. “What time is it? Did something happen?”

“It’s past midnight,” Ron said. “Did we wake you?”

“Yes, but that’s alright,” Hermione said quickly and addressed Smeltling. “Is something the matter? Are those the results from his tests?”

“Yes, they are,” Smeltling said and tapped her clipboard with her wand, “and I have some very… strange, but good, news.”

Ron glanced at Hermione who gave him a small shrug of her shoulders and they both turned to Healer Smeltling.

“What do you mean, strange?” Hermione asked as she sat up on her knees to face the Healer. Ron felt her hand searching for his and he grabbed onto it, now grateful that she was awake for this.

“Well, as you know when you first came in you were first seen by Healer Gumlick-“

Hermione snorted and Ron squeezed her hand, telling her not to comment.

“-and when I took over as your Healer I continued where he left off. However, after studying the results tonight from your bloodwork and wand scans we did this morning I realized he may have been a bit… hasty with his diagnosis.”

“What are you saying?” Ron asked, his nerves standing on end despite her early assurances that this was actually good news.

“The damage to your liver and spleen, while certainly present, was not as severe as previously diagnosed. At first I was worried because-“

“The potions,” Hermione interrupted in a hushed voice and Ron worked out in his own mind why she was suddenly so stunned. “He was given a specific amount for his particular injuries… giving the wrong dose of any medicinal potion can be very dangerous.” Hermione’s voice had risen and Ron could see the panic in her eyes as she glared at Smeltling.

“Yes, I am aware of that,” the young Healer replied calmly, as if she anticipated this response. “Which is why I was alarmed when I found out that I have been inadvertently overdosing one of my patients, obviously something that is not my practice. So came in to check on you,” she said to Ron. “You have been progressing so rapidly. Honestly, I was surprised by your recovery so far, but I was worried that the excess healing potion would eventually make you worse, make things turn the other way.”

“Why didn’t I get worse then?” Ron asked right away, just as Hermione opened her mouth then swiftly shut it, letting Ron speak. “If that’s the case then shouldn’t there be more serious side effects? I just told you, I feel fine. Well, other than the broken bones…”

“Wait,” Hermione said. “Is that why he has been so difficult?”

“Oi!” Ron exclaimed, feeling slightly offended by Hermione’s observation… no matter how true her words were.

“I only meant that you were complaining about feeling hot and you were out of it most of the time,” she said gently then addressed Smeltling once more. “Are you saying this actually  _helped_  him? How is that possible?”

“I’m not exactly sure, but it seems as if his body, instead of rejecting the extra potion, took it in and used it to speed up the healing. We’ve seen this before, but it’s very rare.”

 “So… he’s going to be alright?” Hermione asked, sounding skeptical, but hopeful and that was enough to make Ron feel it, too.

“Yes, I believe Mr. Weasley will be just fine,” Smeltling answered with a warm smile and then stood up, placing her clipboard on the bed and gripping her wand. She looked at Ron and said, “If you wouldn’t mind lying back so I can run a scan, I’d like to confirm my findings.”

With Hermione standing by Ron’s head, Smeltling’s wand slowly traced over Ron’s prone form, glowing from white to yellow, and then to red in the places where it found broken bones. Hermione’s hand was on his shoulder and squeezed as the wand went over his chest and stomach. When the wand continued pulsing white Ron looked up at Hermione and saw the most brilliant smile on her face as she looked back at him, finally accepting that he was in fact healed.

“Well, that last dose must have finished the job,” Healer Smeltling said as she pocketed her wand and picked up her clipboard and started writing furiously with her quill. “We caught it just in time. One more dose would have been too much I imagine.”

“Thank goodness,” Hermione said with a heavy sigh. “You’re brilliant for figuring this out.”

“I’m glad that I did,” Smeltling said as she wrote and then looked at the pair of them. “But I was only doing my job. I’m very sorry this even happened.”

“I’m not,” Ron said and Hermione looked at him sharply. “What? She said I’m gonna be okay, Hermione. Let’s not worry about what might’ve happened and just… try to be positive.” Hermione sighed and then nodded, and Ron knew he would have to do more than that to convince her. Ron then turned to Smeltling, suddenly excited. “Speaking of, does this mean I’ll be able to walk sooner? And use magic?”

“I don’t see why not,” Smeltling answered as she finished writing her notes and read over them. “You will no longer have to take the healing potion or the sleeping draught.” She chuckled at Ron’s triumphant laugh and took two vials of potions out of her robes. Ron’s smile dropped like a stone. “But now you can take the full dose of Skele-Gro and the pain potion without complication,” she continued, sounding entirely too happy about this, at least according to Ron who would rather drink Goblin piss… well, that might be an overstatement.

“How long will I have to take this stuff?” he asked as he took the first open vial from Smeltling.

“Just until your bones are fully healed; About a month or so. We will know for sure next time you come in for a check once a week. We can talk more about this in morning, of course.”

“A month?” Hermione squealed, making them both turn to her. “But you said he wouldn’t be fully recovered until at least Spring.”

Healer Smeltling nodded her head and beamed at them. “Yes, but now that we only have to heal the bones I anticipate a speedy recovery from here on out. Of course, that is just estimation, but it is my strong opinion that you will be up and well before December. Now drink up.”

Ron couldn’t help the smile on his face as he chugged down both potions, and even though they tasted dreadful the good news he had just received could not make it go away. He was going to be okay! And not only that, he would be walking sooner than ever which meant he wouldn’t have to sit in a bloody bed all day long. He vowed right then that he was going to work hard to fully heal way before December.

“Thank you for catching this in time,” Hermione said to the Healer as she sat back down on the bed next to Ron, still in awe of the news. “I still can’t believe it.”

“Yeah, thanks,” Ron said. “I guess I am lucky, huh?”

“Yes, very lucky. Get some more rest and I’ll see you in the morning,” Smeltling said as she pocketed the empty vials, opened the door then closed it quietly behind her with a soft click.

 “This is just… amazing, I suppose.”

“You suppose?” Ron said and then grabbed her hand. “This is a bloody miracle!”

“Are you sure you’re feeling better?”

“Well my ribs and legs are sore, but my elbow is feeling great and I can breathe and…”

Hermione was still frowning and when Ron stopped talking she smiled, but once again Ron could see right through it.

“What’s wrong?” Ron asked and sat up with her. She lifted the top half of the bed so he could sit back comfortably and then settled back on the bed next to him, staring down at her hands. She was acting so strangely that the celebration going on in Ron’s head was petering out quite swiftly. He pulled her hand onto his lap and fixed her with a worrying look. “Do you think there could still be something wrong with me? Because if you believe that then I do too, and we’ll get the Healer back in here to check again. We’ll run more tests.”

“Oh, no! That’s not… This is the best news we could’ve hoped for. I’m just glad this mistake didn’t end up hurting you. You really are lucky. If you had overdosed…”

“But I didn’t,” Ron said and pulled her in closer. She leaned her head on his shoulder, careful not to bump his leg with hers, and sighed.

“Yes, of course. I know you’re right, I can’t help but worry,” she said as they both leaned back on the upright bed, snuggling closer together. “At least you can use magic now.”

Ron was sitting back and enjoying feeling relaxed for the first time in the few days he spent in hospital, those days that now felt like weeks. However, after Hermione reminded him about being able to do magic again his eyes popped open and he sat up, groaning from the pain in his ribs that not even pain potion could hide. It subsided quickly and he turned to Hermione with a look of shock.

“What? What’s the matter?” Hermione asked urgently, her hands sliding across his upper body, searching for signs of injury or a relapse.

“I can do magic!” Ron said and then grinned, ignoring her frustrated huff and rolling eyes.

“I thought something happened to you,” she said with a loud sigh and sat back with her arms folded across her chest, but Ron was already looking around the room.

“Where’s my wand? Could you find it for me? Please?” Ron asked and watched eagerly as Hermione slid off of the bed and searched through her bag.

“Here you are,” she said, now sounding excited as she handed his wand over to him. She grinned at him and said, “It’s only been three days. Did you miss it that much?”

“Did I miss it?” Ron asked incredulously and flicked his wand toward the counter across the room, levitating a scone out of one of the containers him mum had brought over from home.

“Ron!” Hermione tried to snatch the scone as it sailed towards Ron, but he grabbed it first and sank his teeth into it.

“Oh, come on. I’m allowed,” Ron said with his mouth full when he saw Hermione’s disapproving expression. “Sweet Merlin, that’s so fucking good,” he murmured as he chewed with his eyes closed, his tongue darting out to grab at the bits of crumbs that were clinging to his lips. “Fucking hell, I missed real food.”

“Scones are n-“

“Hermione?”

“Yes?”

“Shut it, I’m eating,” Ron said with a grin and then shoved the rest of the scone in his mouth, savoring it and making all the appropriate sounds of a man whom one would swear was one breath away from starvation. Hermione shook her head at him and grinned back. When he was finished she leaned forward and kissed his lips, her tongue reaching into his mouth and he could taste her, making him moan for another reason besides his mum’s delicious food. Hermione giggled against his mouth and then pulled away.

“Were you getting jealous of a scone?” Ron teased and Hermione chuckled. They sat grinning at each other until Hermione’s face slowly turned serious once again.

“Ron, I need to talk to you about something.”

Ron knew this was coming/ His elation over the savory food and Hermione’s kiss was fast diminishing as she looked so nervous, and he debated how to go about this conversation. He thought he had done a pretty good job of navigating this new dynamic between them, with them finally getting together and not having to hide his feelings anymore. It should’ve been easy under normal circumstances. They’ve known each other for so long, they both now knew how the other felt, and all the past misunderstandings and miscommunications have been squashed and dealt with. But starting a relationship after the trauma they both experienced would’ve been hard on anyone. Sure, they had each other – he didn’t know how he would’ve been able to survive the aftermath without her – but her anxiety, her unwillingness to let him help, and then letting him in only to shut down again, was really starting to worry him.

“Hermione, if this is about you going back to Hogwarts you don’t’ have to worry about that now.” Ron said. “You heard the Healer. I’m going to be fine so you don’t have to stay. You can go back just like you planned.”

She gave him such a sad look and he wondered what he could’ve said to make thing even worse.

“You don’t want me to stay with you?”

Ron rolled his eyes and groaned. Of course she would have taken what he said the wrong way.” No, Hermione. That’s not what I meant and you know it. Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“Well, what else could you have meant?” Her voice hitched as she sat up off of Ron’s shoulder and glared at him. “We don’t want to part, am I right? And I told you I’m not leaving, so what is the problem?”

“The problem is that I know how important school is for you! You’d regret it if you didn’t finish, and so would I.”

“But it’s my decision, not yours, what I do with my life. And if I want to be with you then I think I have that right!”

“It is if you’re staying _because_ of me. I don’t need that kind of guilt, Hermione.” Ron took a breath, expecting her to lash out at him again. But when she only stared at him, her expression changing from indignant to hurt, he groaned again, frustrated that he wasn’t getting through to her. “Look, I understand-“

“No, I don’t think you do, Ron. Or else you would not tell me to just leave. Not like this.”

“What do you mean, like this? What does that even mean? Is it your anxiety? Has it gotten worse? Fuck, of course it has. We _were_ just attacked…”

He saw her flinch slightly and his heart sank, knowing that he had just struck a nerve, and also a bit of the truth. She bit her lip and turned away from him as if debating whether or not to go on. He rubbed his face, trying not to show his frustration because there seemed to be something else going on. He wanted to understand, and he did having had enough anxiety himself (how can one go through what they did without it affecting them that way?), but Hermione’s was altogether different than anything he could comprehend. He didn’t know how else to help snap her out of this and get back the pieces of Hermione that she obviously let slip away.

“Hermione, you said you wanted to talk, remember?” Ron said softly and placed his hand on her shoulder. He hated that he couldn’t hug her properly; he couldn’t hold her the way he wanted because she looked so broken at that moment. However, the contact seemed to startle her from her thoughts.

“I’m going to see the Mind Healer in the morning,” she said suddenly, still not looking at him.

“Oh… Well, we did just go through all that shit two days ago... I reckon I’ll need one soon myself,” Ron said with a snort. “But I think that’s great that you’re going. I know how hard it was for you to go the first time.”

She glanced back at him and he smiled at her encouragingly because now he knew for sure that there was more to it than that, but didn’t want to push her. He wanted her to trust him, and at the same time trust her to open up without feeling forced to do so. She finally turned to look at him fully, a thoughtful expression on her face.

“You… should come with me.”

“What? Really?” Ron was dumbfounded. Of all the things he thought she might say, that was not one of them.

“Yes,” Hermione said slowly and nodded. “I think it’d be best if you were with me. It could help both of us. What do you think?”

He wanted to ask her why she needed him to go with her. Why couldn’t she tell him what was wrong on her own, without someone else in the room? What else was she hiding from him? He stopped and told himself that this _was_ her way of not hiding, that it was in fact her reaching out and wanting to help them both. So he felt encouraged by her invitation, wanting to do anything he could to help her, and he nodded.

“What time is the appointment?”


	29. Chapter 29

“Hermione, can’t you go any faster?”

“I’m only being cautious. I’ve never pushed one of these before. I’m not a very good driver.”

Ron tried to turn in his seat, a task already proven impossible the last ten times he tried it, but he made the effort if only to show Hermione how exasperated he was with her.

“What the bloody hell does driving have to do with pushing a wheelchair?” he asked, cranking his neck to see her, unsuccessfully. “And since when are you not good at something?”

Once more he felt her hand on the top of his head, turning it to face forward as she talked.

“You’re going to strain your ribs if you keep doing that, Ron,” Hermione said with a sigh. “I told you, they’re allowing me to take you in this wheelchair for the appointment since you will be using one around the house for the next few weeks, and I don’t want to hurt you so-“

“You’re not going to hurt me, Hermione,” Ron said softly and reached over his shoulder to pat her hand that had a white knuckle grip on the handle. He felt her relax, and he grinned. “Not many snails run into things at _their_ speed so I reckon we’ll be alright if you keep this pace up. I mean, I’ll be able to walk by time we get there, but better safe than sorry, right?”

The wheelchair stopped in its painfully slow tracks in the middle of the empty corridor, the one leading to Mind Healer Paula’s office, and Hermione let out a huff. Ron cringed as he realized he may have forgotten to tighten the screws on the lid of his brain to mouth filter.

“Sorry,” he muttered, bracing himself for a row.

“I’m only trying to be safe, Ron,” Hermione said stiffly after a minute, then started pushing the wheelchair again.                                                                                                                                         

“Yeah, I know.”

Ron felt like an arse for thinking he could try and lighten the mood after returning from an hour filled with nothing but drama and angst. He had never been to a Mind Healer, but he figured it wouldn’t be easy. She needed him for support, and after A lot was discussed during the last hour, most of which revealed things that he didn’t know: George was taking an anti-depressant potion (that bit of news shook Ron as he felt he should have known. His mum and dad, and now Ginny, knew after all.), the same potion that Hermione had been taking a lot of the past two days, and then there was the matter of Hogwarts…

“So what do you think?” Ron asked in an effort to break the tension.

“What do I think about what exactly?” Hermione said as they reached the doors leading into the main corridor. The appointment had been made for very early in the morning so that even as they were heading back to Ron’s hospital room many offices were still closed and visiting hours had yet to begin, which was convenient since they didn’t want anyone except Healer Smeltling to know where they had gone.

“Paula offering that muggle medicine. Are you sure-“

“No, absolutely not.”

“She said as long as you-“

“No, Ron. Mum and dad already tried to talk me into it, but… Those pills… they can be just as bad as a potion.” She stopped at the lifts and pushed the button with her thumb, holding it in for longer than necessary before turning to face Ron.

“Hermione, listen. What happened back there…” Ron trailed off when Hermione crossed her arms and shook her head at him, looking very much like her old stubborn self. He would have smirked then if he wasn’t feeling especially frustrated with her at the moment.

“Ron, you need to trust me on this,” she said and let her arms go slack and smacking against her sides.

“I do trust you, Hermione. I just don’t think you realize how fucking scary it is to see you like that.”

“I know, and I was under a lot of stress, talking about everything, but I don’t need… medicine to get better.”

The lift came then and she sighed, looking relieved, and walked behind Ron to push him inside.

Ron pinched the bridge of his nose as he felt a headache coming on. “But you nearly had another panic attack back there.”

“But I didn’t,” Hermione quickly reminded him as the lift doors clanged shut. She called out their floor and they were reeled sideways.

Ron looked at Hermione who was staring down at her trainers with her hands on her hips. She was working up to something. Then she said something in a quiet voice, but with enough conviction that made Ron’ frustration double in intensity.

“It’s my decision, what to do… Not yours.”

Silence followed as Ron just stared at her profile while she closed her eyes, looking very much like she wanted to take her words back. Ron reached out and pushed the emergency stop button, making the lift shudder to a halt somewhere between floors. He vowed that they weren’t going to move until they sorted this out. He was sick and tired of Hermione’s “fine” act and repeating the same row over and over.

“What are you doing? We need to get back before everyone gets here!” Hermione exclaimed and moved in front of him to release the brake on the lift. Ron grabbed her arm and gently pushed her away from the wall. She looked at him curiously and then rolled her eyes. “Alright, you want to do this here. Go on.”

“You’re stressed out and I don’t want to row with you, Hermione,” Ron said, but he knew from experience that passive does not work with Hermione. He needed to be assertive, no matter how much his head felt like it was pushing against his skull or how his legs that had fallen asleep from sitting for too long.

“Why did you stop the lift then? Because I have to say this is not helping my stress. And I know you’re due for potions. I can tell you’re starting to ache…Can’t we talk another time?”

“No, my family is always hanging about, and I’ll be fine… Look, I know this is your decision. It’s your life, alright?” Hermione went to speak, but Ron cut her off with his outstretched hand. “Why, then, did you want me to come with you to this thing? To see the Mind Healer with you?”

Hermione sputtered, and her eyes widened at Ron’s straightforwardness. “I told you before, that I wanted you to know what was going on.”

“Why?”

“I feel horrible for keeping things from you and I didn’t want to make the same mistake again. I didn’t mean to say that you shouldn’t be involved. Clearly I want you to be since I asked you to come with me... I’m just so frustrated about not being able to get over this and I don’t want it to be your problem.” She leaned against the wall of the lift with her hands bracing the bar behind her, accepting the fact that they weren’t going anywhere until she talked. “But it is, isn’t it? We are in this together. Any problems you have instantly become mine, so why would I expect differently from you? I wouldn’t trade that for anything.”

Ron breathed a sigh of relief. “Neither would I so quit acting as if you’re in this alone, will you?”

Hermione smiled at him and nodded, then was somber once more. “You have to understand how… turned around I feel, how I’ve felt for a while now. I told you in there how badly I need to regain my former self, and I meant that. But I can’t if I’m medicated into doing so. It’s fine for some people but I just can’t do it. Paula said there are other, slower, methods and I’d rather go that route. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, I reckon I do. But you were right; it is your body and I shouldn’t tell you what to do with it… Well, outside of the bed anyway.” He chuckled when Hermione guffawed and shook her head at him. “But you see? This is the Hermione I know: Sure of who she is and what she wants. Not taking the easy way out.”

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.”

“It’s been known to happen.”

“More times than you know.”

She was smiling again. Ron held his hand out to her and she took it then stood in front of his wheelchair. He took her other hand and looked up at her to find her smiling down at him with glassy wet eyes.

“You’re so strong, Hermione. Even now after all that… you’re amazing. I love you, more than anything. And I don’t care how much of a tit that makes me. You can say or do anything and I’ll be there to support you or tell you off for it. Just as you do to me.”

“I do it because I love you, Ron.”

“Exactly.”

Hermione crouched down to her knees between his legs and took her hands out of his to touch his face. They were warm coming from his hands and he was finding it hard to recall the headache he was just nursing.

“You are the amazing one, Ron, for putting up with me the way I’ve been behaving lately.”

“Well I have put you through a lot over the years, haven’t I? We’ll call it even?”

Hermione smiled and he could see the vulnerability in her eyes. She looked so sad yet happy at the same time and it killed him to think that there was nothing else he could do to make her fully happy, not yet anyway. He tucked a long strand of curly hair behind her ear and said, “It’ll get better. When you go back to school…”

Hermione sighed and her hands, gaze, and the moment were turned away from him.

“Hermione, don’t-“

“I don’t know what I’m going to do about that.”

“Paula came up with a brilliant solution. You even agreed it was a good one.”

“Yes, a solution that involves her reporting to Professor McGonagall why she believes I’m not fit to go back to school until November. That’s two months! Then when I go back she’s going to know why I was gone and treat me like I’m… delicate.  No, I either go back in September or not at all.”

Ron held back a groan at Hermione’s stubbornness and pride that was getting in the way of something he knew that she wanted – no, needed. Why can’t she see that?

“And if you don’t go back at all what message would that give? I’ll tell you. It’ll say that you’re backing down and giving up on your purpose, doesn’t it? You said that you wanted to be yourself again. Well, the Hermione I know would never give up this chance! You said that you’re scared you won’t be able to cope at Hogwarts, that you’ll have an attack or something. Well, you can’t stay behind because you’re scared. You need to go _because_ of those fears.”

Hermione was close to tears when she finally looked at him and her voice trembled as she spoke. “I am scared. Not only because of that. I don’t want to give up anything and that includes you... That’s the problem.”

“I’m not going anywhere, as you can plainly see,” Ron said and gestured toward his legs with a grin. She groaned and then sniffed as she looked at his legs that were covered with a blanket. “Sorry, wrong choice of words. Listen, you can go back in September and no one has to find out anything. If you get scared you have Ginny there and you can owl me every day. I’m sure you can set up a floo call once in a while with McGonagall. You are her favorite. And I’ll visit, and so will Harry. And you’ll be swamped with school work. Know they way you work, you’ll find ways to keep your mind busy.”

“I do want to go back…”

Ron could tell she was starting to come around. But then he started to think about what he as actually asking of her her: to leave him. He was convincing her to leave his sight for months on end and the thought almost made him sick. He took a deep breath and tried to focus on what was right for Hermione, not him.

“I’m not trying to get rid of you, believe me,” he said, gaining her attention back again. “If I had it my way I’d have you literally attached to my-

“Ron…” Hermione rolled her eyes and blushed.

“What? I was going to say my hip,” he said. “But honestly, I know this is something you want to do; You just said it yourself. It wouldn’t be right for Hermione Granger not to learn even more than she already does- if that’s even possible.”

“And you aren’t trying to get rid of me?” Hermione gave him a look and smirked at him. His face broke into a grin when he realized she was being cheeky.

“I’m not, just speaking the truth,” he said and tugged on one of her curls. “So you’ll go back then, in September?”

Hermione hesitated, but he could see the excitement in her eyes and some of the sadness that was there ebbed a little.

“Yes, I believe I will. You’re very persuasive,” she said. “And so very insightful. I’m starting to think you’re growing up, Ron. Who would have thought you would be the more mature one in a row?”

Ron laughed and hekd his side as the effort pulled at his ribs. “Don’t let the word get out, will you?”

Hermione stood up quickly and released the brake on the lift, jolting them into motion again. Then she leaned over in front of him and rubbed his back. She looked worried for him, but was also smiling. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to tell everyone I know that you’re still a prat.”

Ron smiled through his grimace of pain and nodded his head. “That’s my girl.”

The expression made Hermione blush as she straightened up, and then he felt her lips press against the top of his head.

“Who else’s would I be? Honestly, Ron.”

She stepped behind the wheelchair just as the lift doors rattled open onto their floor. Thankfully they had a few minutes to spare before visiting hours began and Ron’s family was to show up. He was excited beyond belief at the thought of going home and sleeping in a real bed and – bloody hell – eating real food. He was still in pain, but the promise of returning to the Burrow and of Hermione being set on the right track filled him with enough contentment to overcome anything at the moment.

“And don’t worry,” Ron said when they entered his room. “We’ll write tons of dirty letters and when I visit you can use your head girl priviledges to get out of school. It’ll be brilliant!”

“I am not head girl,” Hermione said mournfully as she set his chair next to the squishy arm chair then sank into it.

“Bollocks.”

Just then Healer Smeltling opened the door, a clipboard in one hand and only two vials of pre-measured potions in the other.

“Today is the big day,” Smeltling said happily. She set the vials down on the counter and started leafing through the papers attached to the clipboard. “So, are you ready to go home?”

Ron looked at Hermione and they shared a similar look of relief, and an understanding passed between them: they were finally on the same page. They had overcome some really big obstacles, but had overcome all of them so far and were stronger for it.

Ron turned to Smeltling and gave her a firm nod. “You’re a great Healer and I want to thank you for everything, but I can’t bloody wait to get home.”


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends! I know it’s been actual literal years since this fic has seen an update. I am back to writing again and my first order of business was to complete Anxious. This is the 2nd to last chapter so after the next one it will be complete!
> 
> If you’ve gotten this far into this story you probably already guessed that this chapter is M rated for language and sexual situations. However, it also deals with some major mental issues such as anxiety and PTSD. If you are uncomfortable with any of that please refrain from reading.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has asked me about this story since I last updated. Seriously, it is because of the continued support and reminders over the years that made me want to write again. I really hope you like it.
> 
> Anyway, disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter!

It was early on a Saturday morning in late September. The sun’s first rays touched the tops of the trees in the distance; bright gold on amber leaves, while high above the dark had yet to recede. Ron wasn’t used to seeing many sunrises as he enjoyed sleeping in way too much. However, on a few occasions, such as this one, he was more than happy to wake up at the buttcrack of dawn. And so it seemed to him that only the promise of Hermione could make the most beautiful sunrises. He didn’t know any other kind.

 “Are you nervous?”

“No. Why? Do I look nervous?”

“You’re sighing every minute and any second now you’re gonna tap your fingers straight through the chair. But no, not nervous at all.”

“I’m just… impatient. She should have been here by now.”

“She still has five minutes.”

“In Hermione time, she’s already ten minutes late. You know that.”

“You worry too much. I think she’s rubbed off on you.”

“It’s been two weeks, Harry. Two whole weeks since I’ve seen her face.”

“You got it bad, mate.”

“Like you haven’t been pining for Ginny? I’ve heard you mumbling in your sleep. It’s sick.”

“… Anyway, you’re definitely nervous, and we both know why.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, you do.”

“Yeah… well, it has to be done. We’ve been through worse. And it’s nothing new.”

“That’s the problem, though, isn’t it?”

Ron sighed. Harry was right.

A week after leaving for Hogwarts Hermione was able to leave the castle on special permission from McGonagall to see her therapist at St Mungos. Hermione managed to convince the Headmistress to let her have the entire day so she could visit her parents, then The Burrow. It wasn’t a long visit, there was little to no privacy, and Ron was still in his wheelchair. They spent the little time they had talking with Harry and enjoying being together again. It seemed that way on the surface, at least; He could tell there was something simmering beneath her smiles and kisses. They had managed to steal a moment to themselves, but it was too soon when she had to leave.

Since then it has been two weeks of letters detailing all naughty things she wanted to do when they could be together again. He enjoyed those letters, but whenever she wrote about school it always seemed rushed and vague, as if she didn’t want to talk about it at all. And when he wrote to her about Auror training, which started in October, she wouldn’t address it in her replies, only that she was happy he was recovering so quickly.

Ron couldn’t wait to see her again, but, like Harry said, he was undeniably nervous. Letters just weren’t enough. He knew she was using this communication barrier to hide things from him. Again.

However, this time Hermione didn’t have an appointment. It was her therapist who suggested this visit and, with McGonagall’s approval, she was able to stay overnight. He was ecstatic to have two days with her, to talk face to face, and to do other… non-talking activities…

“Can I give you some advice?”

“Yeah, alright,” Ron said and turned to his best mate. He’d expressed his concerns about Hermione to him soon after her last visit, and even Harry agreed that something was off. He knew then he’d have to confront her and find out what was going on once and for all.

“Take it easy on her. You get all intense and overprotective – and I get it, you love her – but just… enjoy this time first. All that other shit can wait, at least for another day. You don’t want to ruin the entire weekend from the start. And I’m not just saying this because then I’ll have to deal with you guys if it all goes to shit.”

“You think it’ll go to shit?” Ron asked, suddenly more nervous.

“No! I’m just saying – Look, you guys can get sort of… stubborn.”

“ _She_ can be stubborn,” Ron said and crossed his arms. “’I am perfectly reasonable at least about seventy percent of time.”

“Right,” Harry laughed. “Look, I’m sure you can settle things. Just have fun. That’s all I’m saying.”

“Yeah, I think I get it. Don’t be an asshole until tomorrow. Sorted.”

 “Exactly.”

“You should write an advice column for Witch Weekly. You’re great at this, Harry.”

They laughed and Ron felt some of the tension loosen around his shoulders. He understood what Harry was trying to say. He wanted to enjoy his time with Hermione, especially since he wasn’t sure when their next meeting will be after this weekend. He just wasn’t sure he was patient enough to do that.

“There she is,” Harry reported from his seat on the grass. He scrambled to his feet next to Ron and pointed in the direction where they heard the crack of her apparation.

He sat up in his wheelchair, alert and smiling when he saw her figure pop into view. She hadn’t yet seen them as she was smoothing her hands over her head and shirt, and tugging at the strap of her bag. When she looked up and saw them her face broke into a smile. She waved and started walking briskly to meet them.

“Gonna do it now?” Harry muttered excitedly. Ron nodded. Taking a deep breath, with his eyes on Hermione coming toward him, he braced his hands on the arms of the wheelchair… and stood up.

Hermione suddenly stopped and stared at him wide-eyed in disbelief. When he started walking toward her she broke into a run, her hair flying behind her until suddenly he stood on the grass with a breathless and laughing Hermione in his arms. He picked her up by the waist, making her squeal.

“You’re walking!” she squeaked out. He nodded and kissed the side of her head, burying his face in her hair and taking a long hard sniff.

“Surprise,” he smirked after setting her back on her feet. She looked up at him, wiping tears from her cheeks and shaking her head.

“But, you said the Healer told you- but you lied!”

“A little fib,” he shrugged. “Worth it to see your face just now. Wasn’t it, Harry?”

He turned to Harry who walked up to Hermione and gave her a hug, then laughed when she smacked him on the arm. “You knew! Both of! Ohhh, you prats!” She was still grinning, obviously too elated to be upset. “I can’t believe it. How long have you been able to walk?”

“Just a few days. Aren’t you happy?” Ron asked and did a clumsy tap dance, finishing with jazz hands.

Hermione giggled and nodded. “Of course! This is the best surprise ever. Really.” She stared at Ron with so much adoration, her eyes shining with pride and love, that Ron wished Harry would disappear so he could wrap her in his arms and not let go until they were both shaking and sweaty and –

“It’s good to see you, Hermione,” Harry said. “Even if it is at five in the morning.”

“Right,” Hermione said, shaking her head and looking away from Ron’s gaze. “Sorry. I just had so little time last visit. I wanted to start as early as possible.”

“Brilliant,’ Harry said then smiled. “I really just wanted to witness the look on your face. It was worth it, but I’m going back to bed.”

 “Okay, Harry,” Hermione said and hugged him again. “Let’s do something together later, the three of us.”

“I’d love that, but I told George I’d meet up with him later. Let you two have some time together” he replied. Hermione nodded, but looked disappointed. Then Harry waved at them before making his way back to the house.

As soon as Harry was out of earshot Ron turned to Hermione and said. “Hey,” then cupped her cheeks and moved in to finally kiss her. Their lips moved together as if there was no time between the last one and now. It was familiar and soft, and just as toe tingling as ever.

Ron pulled away slowly. “You’re so beautiful.” He gently stroked her jaw, and ran a thumb across her lips. She smiled shyly and Ron grinned at her pink cheeks. “I’ve missed seeing you blush like that.”

“Oh, Ron.” She whimpered and fell into him, her arms circling his waist and her face on into his chest. “I’ve missed you so much. Two weeks felt like an eternity.”

“An eternity and a day,” he muttered and squeezed her back with one arm while stroking her hair with the other. “Do you want to go inside? Have some tea? I can make breakfast.” He murmured into her hair.

“That sounds nice, but I had something before I left,” she answered with a yawn. He pulled back to look at her closely. He hadn’t noticed before, but there was a tinge of darkness under her heavy lidded eyes; she looked exhausted.

“Or we could go back to sleep,” he suggested, watching her carefully. “It’s still early. We have a few hours before anyone wakes up, and I told mum and dad you weren’t coming until noon.”

“Hmm… alright. I guess that could work,” she said and yawned again.

He sighed with relief. He desperately wanted to have her in his bed again, but he also knew that she hadn’t been getting enough rest, which meant anything but sleep was out of the question. “Up late reading?” he asked casually and took her hand as they walked toward the house.

He watched as Hermione nervously tucked her hair behind her ear and looked down at the ground. “Yeah, something like that. School has been… busy. Lots of work. Head Girl stuff…”

“Right,” Ron sighed, too tired to question her further.

He knew they needed to have a serious talk, but he wanted to take Harry’s advice and focus on making this weekend the best it could be. And as they tiptoed up the stairs to his room he had no choice but to focus on her bum in his face, and for that he was very grateful.

“Oh, it smells… nice in here,” Hermione said with a sniff and a wrinkle of her nose after Ron closed his bedroom door behind them and silenced the room. He let out the breath he’d been holding, relieved that his parents were still asleep. She dropped her bag on the floor and looked around.

“I told Harry he used too much of that spraying stuff mum put together. She said I needed something stronger than usual. Bollocks. Made my eyes sting for hours afterward.” Ron went to open the window to ventilate the room.

“It’s not that bad. I didn’t expect for you to go through all this trouble,” Hermione said as she sat down on Ron’s bed and ran her hand over the orange quilt. “I’ve never seen it as clutter-free as it is now. I didn’t even trip on the way to the bed!”

“Very funny,” Ron grinned, pleased with himself. “I did it for you. With Harry’s help. Although if he had his way this room would have nothing in it but a bed and dresser. Just… don’t open the closet. Consider that your warning.”

He sat down next to her and leaned back on his elbows. Hermione turned to her side and looked down at him. “Well, I like it. It shows effort and initiative. Top notch job.”

“Well, I’m glad you approve,” he chuckled.

Hermione smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes - her tired eyes that were filled with sadness and feelings he didn’t get in any of her letters, but felt between the lines. He wanted desperately to reach in and pull those paragraphs and sentences and words from within her, to read her soul, to understand her mind and the way it had reshaped itself after the war. No one was the same afterwards, but no one else was Hermione. No one else made him feel so helpless and whole at the same time. He was beginning to worry that so much of his life, his frame of mind and emotions, were wrapped up in her. It all came down to this one person, and it scared the shit out of him.

He couldn’t take the intensity of that moment. Not this early in the morning. Not so soon after not seeing each other for weeks.

“Is something wrong?” Hermione asked when he suddenly stood up and went to close the window.

“No, it’s just getting a bit cold in here,” he answered with his back to her. “Did you want a shirt to sleep in?”

“No, I don’t need anything.”

When he turned around Hermione was down to her bra and knickers and his previous mood vanished as he wondered just how tired she really was and how he can keep her awake for just five – no, ten minutes…

“There’s my Ron,” she said with a smirk as she wrapped a stretchy band around a massive bun-like ponytail on top of her head. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“You just – I mean, you look… amazing,” Ron stuttered, gesturing at her as if it were obvious, and how could he not notice how perfect she was?

“Not likely,” she said with a roll of her eyes, and then climbed into bed. “I know how worn-out I look, because I feel it in every bone of my body.” She stretched her arms over her head and yawned really wide. “I’m done in… Oh, but I’ve missed this bed.” She then pulled the quilt up to her nose and closed her eyes. “At least this still smells like you. Mmmm.”

Ron watched all of this from his spot on the floor. The way her body moved, the flashes of exposed skin, the way her face changed as she yawned and smiled, the way she smelled his scent and seeing how it made her feel: safe, comfortable and… content. Being the reason for that level of simple satisfaction was a bit overwhelming.

“What are you doing over there?” Her voice was drowsy as she reached her hand out for him to join her.

_This is way too much thinking for one morning, you soft wanker. Go the fuck to sleep already._

So he stripped down to his pants then ambled over to the bed and slipped in beside Hermione. As soon as he was under the quilt she curled into him, tucking her head into his neck with her arms trapped against his chest, her legs bent with one between his knees. Despite her recent composure, her body was wound tight, like a ball of nerves and stone. Ron held her inside his warmth and limbs, and pressed his hands along her back. She sighed and snuggled in close to kiss him lightly on his collarbone.

“It’s alright,” he whispered in her ear, because something told him she needed to hear it. “You’re here now. I’m not letting go.”

Up and down his hands went, soothing her muscles until her body relaxed and her soft snores filled his ears.

XXXXX

Ron woke up slowly, stretching his aching legs. He groaned and rolled to his side. Feeling that something was missing, he was suddenly awake. Opening his eyes, he felt around the bed to find it empty beside him.

He sat up quickly and looked around the room. Empty. Hermione’s clothes and bag were also gone. Confused and trying not to panic, Ron grabbed his wand and got to his feet. He cursed under his breath, forgetting that after lying down for a long time his legs would ache. He grimaced as he stumbled into his trousers and opened his door. Listening hard, he heard voices that sounded like Harry and Hermione coming from all the way down in the living room.

Relieved, but also annoyed, he carefully made his way down the stairs.

_How did I not hear her get up? Why didn’t she wake me? What the hell is going on?_

When he finally made it to the living room, out of breath and wincing from the discomfort in his legs, he saw Hermione on the sofa, drinking tea and nodding at something Harry was saying. It looked like he walked in on a serous conversation so of course he decided to clear his throat loudly.

“Ron!” Hermione jumped when she saw him, almost spilling her tea and placing her cup down on the table. “I didn’t hear you come down. You startled me.”

“Hey… What time is it?” He rubbed his face, trying to wake up and get an idea how Hermione managed to be sitting down here fully dressed without him.

“Half past nine,” Harry answered and sat back on the sofa.

Ron was disappointed that his plan to have her alone in his room until noon didn’t work out. “Why didn’t you wake me? Where’s mum and dad?”

Hermione sat up straight and looked at him apologetically. “I had to use the loo so I got dressed and took my things in case I ran into Molly,” Hermione started to explain, and then Harry interrupted.

“But I saw her in the hallway and told her Mrs. Weasley had already gone to Bill and Fleur’s, and Mr. Weasley went to the Ministry.”

“So I came down here since Harry made tea. I’m sorry. I should have woken you, but you were sound asleep,” she said.

“Er… okay,” Ron said, looking at their slightly guilty faces. He was relieved nothing bad had happened and he had slept through it, but what the hell did he walk into? “Now that’s cleared up I have to piss like a hippogriff. So you can go back to talking without me,” he said and turned to go back upstairs. He felt stupid for acting jealous, but he was growing tired of secrets and waking up to Hermione gone did something to his temper and ego.

“Oh, Ron, don’t be like that,” Harry said and Ron turned around, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “We told you what happened. Why are you acting like we did something wrong?”

Ron looked at Hermione and she looked so upset that he instantly felt bad. “I don’t think that,” he said, uncrossing his arms. “I was worried when I woke up and you weren’t there,” he said to Hermione.

“I didn’t mean to worry you, honestly,” she said softly then walked to him and put her hand on his arm. He couldn’t help but soften at the touch. “He asked me about school and we got into talking about… things. I’m sorry, Ron. It wasn’t anything secretive. Okay?”

He nodded because he didn’t know what else to say. He trusted Hermione, but when it came to telling him the truth about what was going on with her she hasn’t always been upfront with him. To think of her confiding in Harry while he slept upstairs upset him more than he wanted to admit. So he nodded and gave her a smile, but told her with his eyes that he didn’t fully believe her. She let go of his arm and frowned as he turned to go back upstairs to the loo.

XXXXX

Ron decided to take a shower before heading back downstairs. He needed some time to cool off and think about what he was going to say to Hermione when he saw her next. He decided he couldn’t wait until tomorrow, especially seeing how distracted she’s been since she arrived.

So he summoned clothes from his room and went into the loo to clean up… and maybe take care of the hard on that wouldn’t go away since he saw Hermione’s knickers hours ago. He was just stepping into the water when the door opened and closed behind him. Turning around he was met with an out of breath Hermione leaning against the door.

“What are you- oh,” Ron stopped talking when Hermione put her fingers to her lips and took out her wand to silence the room.

“Harry went for a fly,” she said as an explanation. She started talking again and stopped abruptly when her eyes met his naked crotch. “Can you, um, put a towel on? I can’t talk when it’s looking at me like that.” Startled out of his shock of Hermione bursting into the bathroom, Ron wrapped a towel loosely around his waist and stood silently, watching her pace in the space in front of the door, wringing her hands.

“I just wanted to make sure we were okay,” she started. “I was so worried coming here and seeing you again because there are things I know we need to talk about, and when you came downstairs and acted put out, as if Harry and I were conspiring or something… I didn’t want you to think I was hiding anything from you.” She stopped and faced him, staring at him sincerely. Her eyes then dropped down to his chest and Ron’s ears burned when she looked lost in thought and her cheeks turned pink.

“Hermione?” he asked quietly. As mush as he appreciated her looking at him like that he was more curious about what she was actually saying.

“Right, sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “We have a lot to talk about, Ron… but,” then she took a step toward him, “I just… wanted to make sure we were okay first.” Her tongue then swiped across her bottom lip and Ron felt his resolve dissolve.

“We’re okay, Hermione. No matter what we’ll always be okay,” he answered and couldn’t help the urge to touch her. So he reached out and touched her face, tracing her jaw, and watched as she closed her eyes and her body seemed to relax just from that simple gesture.

Then she stepped back and smiled before peeling her jumper off and dropping it to the floor. Her bra clad tits were pushed together as she bent over to take off her boots.

“Do you think it would it be alright if we talked later?” she asked breathlessly.

“Fuck yeah,” Ron muttered and grinned stupidly as he watched her unbutton her jeans, slide them over her smooth thighs, and throw them on top of her jumper. She stood there in her knickers and bra for the second time that day, this time her smoldering eyes drinking in his body. And just like that he pushed all other worries and doubts from his mind and let his towel drop; his hand involuntarily moved to stroke himself. He almost laughed when she shuddered.

Hermione, obviously of the same mind, unhooked her bra and took her knickers off, kicking them both to the side. Then she walked slowly to Ron, swaying her hips. When she was close enough for his tip to graze her navel she placed both hands on his hips, her fingertips making circles on his skin.

“Hermione,” Ron muttered, sliding his hands up her arms then down her sides. Oh, how he missed her touch, the way her small hands found any place on his body and marked it as her favorite. She had a way of doing that all over, eventually making him feel completely on edge in the best way possible.

“Ron,” she whispered. “I’ve dreamt this.” She moved in closer, pressing him against her stomach until he felt her small hardened nipples rubbing his chest.

“You’ve _written_ this,” Ron replied, remembering one of her letters in particular where she detailed a scenario quite the same as this one. “Want to turn a fantasy into reality?”

“It’s certainly doable,” she grinned wickedly as her hands made their way up to his chest, over his nipples and shoulders. She pushed him gently until the backs of his legs bumped the edge of the tub. He understood what she wanted and, without looking away from her, stepped backwards into the shower. The hot water hit the top of his head, splashing in his face and down his body. He watched as Hermione tapped herself with her wand, and then moved aside so she could join him.

“Of course the tub was a bit bigger in my dream…”

“Shit, and I forgot to do the spell,” Ron cursed.

“I just did one on myself,” Herimone said as she stood sputtering under the water, her hair quickly matted to her face and shoulders. “I’m also taking a muggle contraceptive. So we’re good.”

“Brilliant,” Ron said and pulled her to him, tired of waiting and talking. Wet bodies slid against each other, and eager lips met underneath the cascades of water. She felt different this way, all slippery and rubbery. He was in awe as he squeezed her tits, arse and hips, loving the way every part of her was smoother and slicker under his roaming hands.

There was fluidity to their movements, a faster pace to their kissing with tongues dancing and slipping in and out of their mouths. Ron turned them so Hermione’s head wasn’t under the water. He kept one hand on the small of her back and the other in her hair as he assaulted her neck with kisses, licking and sucking up the water that pooled in her collar bones, and the droplets that streaked down her neck and chin.

“Oh, Ron,” Hermione groaned as she tilted her head back, her hair plastered to the tiled wall Ron was pressing her up against. “I missed you so much.” Her hands were all over his back as she arched into him, sliding herself along his cock, teasing the head against her opening. When Ron made his way down to rolling his tongue around her nipples she grabbed his hair and growled. She lifted her leg and wrapped it around his thigh, standing on her toes.

She was so open to him, so full of trust and bliss that it drove Ron mad. He took both of her thighs in his hands and lifted, then reached around to hold her up by her arse, his fingers spreading her cheeks and digging into her plump skin. She instantaneously wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled herself up to wrap her legs around his middle.

“Just like in the letter, Ron. Remember?”

He nodded, excited as he knew what came next. Pressing her against the wall again, he pulled his lower half back and, this time his cock hitting its mark, slipped into her so quickly and easily that they both gasped and froze with the hot water beating down on them.

“You feel so good like this, Hermione. Holy shit.” He felt her stretch around him as he pulled out and then in again, his arse clenching and legs straining as he held her up. He pushed her into the wall and was in so deep he could feel his balls on her arse. He kissed her hard on the lips as he repeated the movement, pumping in and out of her slowly.

“Oh, my god. Ron… Oh…” Hermione moaned between heated kisses. Her hands gripped his sides, and her thighs squeezed his waist as she met him with every rise and dip, sighing and whimpering.

“Does it feel good?” he grunted, then paused to roll one nipple between his fingers. She nodded silently, licking her lips as he bent down to flick it with his tongue. She gasped and he repeated the sequence on the other nipple, making her thrust her pelvis up, demanding he move again.

“Tell me,” he insisted and swiveled his hips. Hermione moaned loudly and her hands made a wet slapping noise when she grabbed his arse. He jumped and felt himself go in deeper. Hermione made a satisfying noise and grinned at him.

“Feels bloody brilliant,” she giggled and wiped her face of water. “Can we continue now please?”

The combination of her swearing and politeness while he throbbed hard and hot inside her wet slick folds was too much for him… and she knew it.

Crushing his mouth to hers once more, Ron wrapped his arms around her more securely and resumed the best love making fuck session of his life thus far.

“Faster, Ron,” Hermione panted, her lips still on his. He started pushing harder and faster, watching her eyebrows crease and listening to her gasp every time her arse thumped against the wall.

“Okay?” he mumbled as his hips moved faster. She cried out in response and nodded frantically. He kept his eyes open, taking in the scene of a very wet and very out of control Hermione, soaked from head to toe with streams of water sliding from the center of her bouncing tits, down into her navel, and disappearing into the sparse hairs between her legs that met with his. He leaned back and bent down to see his cock slide rapidly in and out. He was so turned on he knew he would blow any second.

However, his legs were growing tired and sore, and his feet were slippery on the floor of the tub, but he gritted his teeth and readjusted, lifting her legs higher on his hips and bending his knees to get a better angle. Hermione’s eyes opened and they shared a look, both feeling something new in this position. Her eyes remained open, blinking against the water, and locked on his. Her tongue was sliding around her lips, and her breath was coming out in short spurts as he started moving again, with more determination and passion.

“Yes… yes… yes…” she hissed over and over again until her eyes were pinched shut and her mouth opened wide. She shook and shuddered with so much force Ron had to focus on not dropping her. But feeling her heat pulsating and squeezing around him he had to let go. Soaked with water and sweat, out of breath and panting, and holding onto each other’s slippery bodies, they came together.

Soon after the adrenaline wore off and he had no more to release, the pressure and aching in his legs came back in full force. He hissed in pain and carefully extracted himself from Hermione. When her feet touched the bottom of the tub he let her go and slowly sat down, almost slipping in the process.

“Ah… shit,” he grunted and placed his hands on his legs, willing them to stop trembling. He heard the squeaking of knobs and suddenly it was silent as water no longer rained down from above. Hermione kneeled in front of him and there were a few seconds of nothing but heavy breathing between the two of them.

Hermione then lifted his chin until she could look him in the eyes. “Ron, what happened? Is it your legs?” she whispered, trying to catch her breath and looking panicked. “How bad is it? What do you need?”

“S’okay, Hermione,” Ron said. He was worn out - this was the most exercise he’d had in about a month. “It’s been a while since- you know… Guess I should’ve eased into it, yeah?”

“But your legs-“

“Will be fine,” he interrupted, desperate to get past the worry over his physical limitations, and also the embarrassment that was threatening to overshadow everything else that just happened.

“Are you sure?” Hermione said and looked down at his hands that were rubbing from his thighs down to his calves. “I mean, you were walking earlier so I figured… I never would have suggested…” She stopped and frowned. “Am I too heavy, is that it?”

Ron laughed. “Are you serious? No, Hermione, you’re perfect.” He shook his head at her in amazement and enjoyed seeing her blush again. “Okay, I think I can stand now.” The trembling had stopped and he didn’t fancy sitting naked in a tub with Hermione staring at him like he’s going to break.

He got to his feet without wobbling too much, and then got out of the tub with Hermione insisting her help, offering to levitate him to which he declined rather vehemently.

“Ron, should I be worried?”

He knew she’d never let it go if he didn’t explain. Grabbing them both towels he started drying himself and said, “After my last appointment with Smelting, when we found out I could walk again, she told me it would take a a few days before I was fully healed. That I’d be sore throughout the day, especially during, er, vigorous activities. I have to get the muscles used to moving again… or something like that.”

“Are you taking any potions for the pain? Physical therapy?”

“Nah, I hated taking the stuff, you know that. I’ve been doing these stretches and exercises every day, and they sort of help. Yeah, maybe I shouldn’t have used my legs like that, but don’t tell me that wasn’t fucking brilliant. Or, I should say… brilliant fucking?” He grinned at her and quirked an eyebrow.

Hermione gave a small laugh. “Alright, it was… incredible. I just don’t want you to over exert yourself, not for me.”

“Love, that wasn’t just for you.” She rolled her eyes as he pecked her cheek and Ron’s chest felt a bit lighter. “I got caught up in the moment. We don’t have many of those these days.”

“I know,” she took a deep breath and seemed nervous all of a sudden. “I hate that you were hurt so badly. And then I had to leave you still injured... I was so happy to see you walking this morning. It was like a weight had been lifted, for both of us. I thought we could go back to normal… but I feel like things will never be normal again. I don’t even know what normal is anymore…”

They stood in silence for a few seconds as the tension from earlier and things unsaid filled the air between them.

“Come on,” he said with conviction, coming to a realization that, despite Harry’s advice, if he waited any longer she would close up again and he’d never forgive himself for letting her. “Let’s get dressed and talk somewhere without a toilet.”

She nodded and they got dressed as quickly as possible. Before leaving through the back door Ron grabbed a slice of bacon, eating as they walked outside. It was early afternoon so it wasn’t as cool as it was earlier, but there was still a chill in the Autumn air. He looked up and saw Harry on his broom, a speck of black against the blue cloudless sky. He was flying fast over the house, practicing his seeker moves as he made sharp turns and dips. He stopped in mid-air and waved at them. Ron waved back and felt envious; he missed flying almost as much as he’d missed Hermione.

Turning away from Harry and thoughts of flying he took Hermione’s hand and led her to the edge of the lake. They sat on the cool grass facing each other, and he pulled her hand to his lips. He heard her sigh and looked up to see her smiling at him. He smiled back, glad that they were off to a good start.

“So,” he began, taking a deep breath and stroking her knuckles with his thumb, “first of all, there is no such thing as normal. The faster we get that fact out of the way the faster we can actually be… normal. That doesn’t make sense. I mean-“

“I know what you mean,” Hermione interrupted. “It was a foolish thought that I wouldn’t have to talk about it or even think about it because everything was alright again. That we could continue without me having an anxiety attack or blubbering on about some stupid thing I made up in my head.”

Ron shook his head, “Look, we all have our own shit to deal with. There are reasons for the way you feel, I know that. I feel them, too. We just have our own ways of coping, don’t we? I just can’t stand to hear you say you made it up or feel guilty for how you feel. That’s not fair to you. Or me.”

“Nothing about this is fair,” she said quietly.

“It hasn’t been fair for a very long time,” he agreed. “Since before we took off with Harry it’s been one thing after another. And now we’re supposed to be happy it’s over… it’s confusing because we’re not, but we are in a way. I never know how to feel about it all. I’m just as broken, Hermione, but being with you, knowing you love me and that we have each other, makes me feel like I can go on. Like there’s a future - a reason to live is what I’m saying.”

“Oh, Ron,” Hermione sniffled and kissed his hand.

“But,” he continued, “I wish I could do what you do for me. I can see it sometimes, how being with me makes you happy. Or at least I think so.” She nodded and a tear rolled down her cheek. “But you shut me out. You don’t tell me how you really feel sometimes. We talk about it, but then it happens again and it’s like we’re going around in circles.”

“I’m sorry. I-“

“Let me finish,” he said and squeezed her hand. She closed her mouth and wiped her tears away. He felt terrible for making her cry, but he had to say this now or he might never get the nerve again. “I’m not accusing you of anything. I’m just saying I notice when it happens. That I can see something else is going on when you say there isn’t, even in your letters. And when you come here saying you’re not sleeping because of school, I know that’s not the only reason. You try to be so strong, Hermione, but it’s like… the bigger the wall is around you, the harder it is to break down, and when it finally does there’s gonna be a big fucking mess.” Hermione looked away and chewed her lip, his words obviously having an effect on her. “I don’t want you to get to that point. Not when I can see it happening.”

He paused to breathe and peered at her, waiting for a response. He wasn’t sure if any of that made any sense, but he’d been thinking about it for weeks and he wasn’t sure he got it out the way he intended.  

“I want to explain,” she said quietly then took a deep breath. “Okay, so in one of my therapy meetings I learned that I have something called post traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. I knew I had some anxiety, but ever since I returned to school my symptoms worsened. It was so soon after the attack and your injury. And being at Hogwarts, at the site of the battler, where we lost so many… I’d see and hear things everywhere I went. It was crippling in a way I didn’t expect. I thought I could handle it. But the more I tried to suppress it the worse it felt.” She started crying again. Ron moved to sit beside her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. It was breaking his heart to hear her talk like this, but she was finally opening up, and he knew if they were to move on he had to let her talk.

She wiped her eyes and said, “When I was with you at St. Mungos I- I was taking this potion they had given me, a calming draught. But I had taken so much that by the end of the day it was almost gone. Ginny saw it and told me off, but I dismissed her, rationalizing that I needed it. But when you woke up later I reconsidered and poured the rest out in the sink.”

“That’s why you didn’t want anything from the therapist that day?” he asked, remembering when he went with her to a meeting and she refused the potion. “Well, I’m proud of you for doing that. I’m sure it wasn’t easy.”

Hermione shook her head and new tears started falling. Ron’s heart fell along with them, not knowing what more to expect. “At school I learned how to make more and started taking it again. Remember when I visited two weeks ago? I was still taking it then. It was how I was able to even leave the castle. But when I got back…”

“Hermione?” he asked, his heart now thumping hard in his chest. “Did something happen?”

She finally looked at him; her glassy eyes were shimmering with pain and sadness. She was breathing heavily and he feared she was on the edge of a panic attack. “The nightmares… they were coming more often, more vivid. I couldn’t concentrate while reading anything. I’d see you laying there… the blood...  I saw Remus, Tonks… Fred as I walked to class, getting knocked out by that blast, which reminded me of how close you were to- to dying.” Ron felt his face turn red. Anger and resentment toward Death Eaters, Voldemort, for not getting over that balcony fast enough; all of it was rising to the top of his head and he had to force himself to stay calm, for Hermione’s sake. “I’d jump at loud noises, avoid certain areas and take the long way to class. Then I started skipping class. I just wanted to sleep and just not think for once. Paula offered muggle drugs, anti-depressants, and I accepted.”

“So you were taking a potion and muggle drugs? Is that even safe?” Ron felt like his heart was going through a twister, his mind reeling from all this information. He knew there was something going on, but not this. And he was still waiting for more. “What else, Hermione?” he asked hoarsely, growing impatient and more concerned with every word that came out of her mouth. “You said something happened?”

She moved away from him and brought her knees up to her chin. Her face crumbled for a moment before she sniffed and regained her composure. “As Head Girl it is my responsibility to report and confiscate things from students and take them to McGonagall.” She cleared her throat and took another deep breath, staring out at the lake. “Well, soon after I returned to school about two weeks ago I caught some Slytherin boys trying to sneak in some firewhiskey. I don’t even know where they got it from. It doesn’t matter. But I took it from them, intending to turn it in, but instead of reporting it I… I took it to my room.”

“Whoa,” Ron breathed out, not expecting to hear any of this, let alone Hermione breaking the rules and then drinking firewhiskey - at school, no less. “Hermione, what the hell?”

“I know,” she cried and then stood up and started pacing in front of him. “I was restless and the calming potion wasn’t working anymore. I had taken the anti-depressant, but I still felt depressed and I couldn’t sleep. I was so tired… I was alone and walking the halls and I was scared of every sound and shadow… I saw it as a solution to a problem. I thought I’d drink until I got sleepy and it would muddle my mind enough so I wouldn’t get any nightmares. I know, it was stupid. But I was desperate. It took me an hour to work up the nerve to take a sip, but then I ended up drinking half the bottle in my room that night.”

“Fuck,” Ron whispered, intense worry and fear crawling all over him. He jumped to his feet, needing to move and release some energy to let something out before he burst. Hermione jumped and he instantly felt awful. He went to put his hands on her shoulders and she flinched. “Sorry, I’m just… shocked I guess. All this happened and I had no idea… fucking hell… I can’t believe you’d do something like that. Did you get sick? Are you okay now?”

She crossed her arms over her stomach and took a deep breath. “I didn’t feel much at first. I was waiting for that buzz everyone always talks about. So I drank more and more, and slowly my vision started to blur and spin. So I thought alright, I’m pissed then. Great.” She laughed derisively and shook her head. “Then I was very much smashed, but even more depressed and angry. I remember lots of crying and dizziness… I dunno.” She shook her head and Ron rubbed her arms, frowning and listening, and holding his tongue.

“I must have passed out because I woke up on the floor with Ginny over me, yelling my name. I was so embarrassed.” Her face was flame red and her eyes were shut as she spoke quickly about what happened. “My room was a mess. I found out I was unconscious for an entire day. It was a weekend so no one but Ginny thought to look for me. She threatened to tell McGonagall, but I begged her not to. She got rid of the bottle for me, but I couldn’t handle it. I was scared and felt guilty for making Ginny keep another secret. I told my therapist about the incident a few days later. She reported it to McGonagall anyway. I didn’t get punished; I’m still Head Girl. But she told my parents so now I have to go to monthly meetings at a muggle rehabilitation center to talk about alcohol abuse.” She avoided Ron’s gaze, staring down at her feet. Ron felt like his heart had plummeted to the ground along with them. “I don’t deserve to be Head Girl, and I… I don’t deserve you.”

Hermione finally stopped to take a breath, then started crying in earnest. She dropped back down to the ground and covered her face with her hands, sobbing loudly. Ron kneeled and pulled her in to cry on his shoulder, rubbing his hands on her back. He was at a loss. Everything she just said played out in his mind in a loop. Imagining her feeling low enough to leave all logic behind and attempt an escape such as this… he couldn’t do it. The image of a raging drunken Hermione, alone in her room and then passing out… it hurt his head, and his heart. What was he supposed to do? Which words could fix something that already happened? He felt helpless. He thought going back to school would be good for her; he even told her as much.

“Hermione,” he croaked, then cleared his throat and hugged her tighter. “You don’t have to go back there. As a matter of fact, you shouldn’t. Stay here, with me. I can work for George and be here with you every night and on my days off.” He was starting to become excited about having a plan. It seemed so simple!

Hermione’s sobbing slowed to a sniffle as he spoke, and then she pulled away. Her face was red and blotchy, streaked wet with tears. “I can’t,” she said shakily. “It’s not that easy, to just drop everything. I have… commitments and… I… I need to do this.”

“You need to feel safe and happy,” Ron countered. “Being there is too much for you. There are too many bad memories. I don’t even want to be there, and neither does Harry. There’s a reason for that, Hermione.”

She shook her head sadly. “If I stay here yes, we’ll be together, and that is honestly all I want to do. But I have to face these fears. It’s difficult and terrible, but it’s necessary.”

“I didn’t know it was this serious, Hermione,” Ron said, sitting back on his heels he ran a hand through his hair, frustrated. “But I don’t see how being somewhere you don’t want to be is helpful. It doesn’t make any sense.”

His voice caught in his throat and he looked away, too angry to speak. He didn’t understand any of this, or rather he refused to. He was willing to go through missing her when she left for school, and then when he’d leave for Auror training. But after what he just heard… how can he just let her go? How can he leave her like this? After a few moments Hermione reached over to place a hand on his knee.

“You have to understand why I have to go back. Because I really don’t want to, and if you tell me to stay then I will, but I’ll never get over this. You’ll resent me for not going into Auror training and I’ll wish I hadn’t given up school. We’d be hiding and lying to ourselves, and that is not what we fought for, Ron.” She stared at him, pleading for him to tell her things he wasn’t sure were true. “I need you to believe in me, that I can handle this. I need your support, Ron. I know it’s a lot to ask, and I hate doing it. But I can’t do this alone, I know that now.”

Ron tried desperately to grasp at anything to resist her words. “I don’t like this, Hermione. I don’t want you to leave again. Not after what you just told me. It doesn’t feel right,” he said, forcing himself not to cry. He could feel his resolve crumbling; Deep down he knew that she was right. Keeping her closed up in his house, in his room, under his watchful eye- what kind of relationship, what kind of life, is that? He’d be responsible for Hermione slipping further away from herself, when all he wanted was for her to return to her feisty, bossy, stubborn, and smart as a whip self. He had to let her go, and trust that this time would be different. She wasn’t asking permission; she was going back with or without his consent, he knew that already.

“But,” he finally said, “you’re gonna go anyway, aren’t you? No matter what I say?” She nodded and he sighed heavily. Even though he knew in his head it was the right thing to do, in his heart he felt defeated. “I just want you to be happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. I... I don’t want to hold you back, Hermione.”

“I don’t want that, either. I don’t want you to give up becoming an Auror because of me,” Hermione replied and rose to her knees to grab his hands and squeezed them in hers. “That’s why we have to be on the same page. I’ve screwed up so many times, but I’m trying to do the right thing. I finally feel like there’s a real chance to have what we want. But it’ll take some time. It’s daunting and murky on my end, but I can feel it. This past week, after talking to my parents, my therapist, and McGonagall… I have some clarity that I haven’t had in months. It’s helped me get to this point, to talking to you about it, which was the scariest part about all this… I care so much for you.”

“Is it really that hard to talk to me?” he asked edgily.

“Only because I was afraid of losing you,” she said and looked down. “I didn’t want to trouble you with my problems while you’re going through this tremendous loss. And the relationship has always been fragile, with us teetering on the edge of things for so long. Then we were finally together and… I wanted to make it easy for us. So I tried to hide what I was going through, but you’re too perceptive and so damn insistent, even though you think you aren’t.” She smiled sadly and Ron rubbed her knuckles with his thumbs. “I should have believed you when you said you’d always be there. I’m so sorry, Ron.”

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. “I’m sorry you had to go through that. You shouldn’t have to deal with this alone. Because you’re not alone. Never, alright?”

“You’re not mad at me?” Her voice was quiet and she seemed to still in his arms.

“Why would I be mad at you?” he asked and leaned back to look at her incredulously. “I want to help you, Hermione. It’s just a fucked up thing that happened because other fucked up shit happened.”

“I love you so much, Ron.” Her lip started to quiver and he leaned back in, holding her close.

“I love you, too, Hermione.”

Fighting back more tears, Ron looked to the sky and noticed Harry was no longer flying. His mind was still staggered with thoughts and worries about Hermione, wondering if they made the right decision to separate once more. He thought about it and realized that the next four months will be the longest they’ll be away from each other since fourth year. Her visits during the summers and sometimes at Christmas had become so normal for them, as well as seeing each other every day at Hogwarts. He thought about the last year when they shared a tent, living in close quarters for months, and when he left and couldn’t reach them for a month; that was hard as hell for him. He couldn’t imagine a longer separation, especially now.

Soon they will begin a new chapter in their lives where being together coincided with being apart. Ron didn’t know what the hell to expect, but she was here right now in his arms; he could feel her hair tickling his nose and her warm breath on his neck. The weight of her body leaning on his chest and between his legs, his arms around her back and hands in her hair, some of it still wet from the shower they both just took together where they did the most exhilarating and fantastically sexy things…

He decided that, although Harry’s advice was good, he was glad they talked about this now, instead of waiting. And despite everything they talked about, and his feelings about what happened, he felt relieved. However, the suspicions he had from reading her letters were now justified. A lot of conflicted emotions coiled and knotted in his chest; her voice telling him things he never thought he’d hear coming from her… the words sank to the pit of his stomach, twisting and turning; the forced images of Hermione alone, fearful and depressed flashed to the front of his mind in a slideshow of evidence that he wasn’t there when she needed him the most…

“Do you want to go inside?”

She shook her head. “No, I like it out here. The open space, the lake, with you…” She looked up at him and smiled. “Is it okay if we stay here for a while?”

“Sure, of course,” he replied then moved to stand up. “I’ll get us a blanket and some food. Will you be okay ‘til I get back?”

“I’ll be fine, Ron. Really,” she said. He expected her to roll her eyes at him for even asking, but she was calm and seemed to understand his hesitation for leaving her alone. “Can you see if your mum left any scones?”

He nodded, then after a moment of them gazing at each other he leaned over and kissed her quickly on her lips before walking back to the house. He passed through the kitchen and then the living room where Harry sat polishing his broom. He walked past and up the stairs, ignoring Harry as he called his name. He pushed his way into the loo and as soon as he slammed the door shut and silenced the room he shouted the loudest “Fuck!” that he possibly could.

It wasn’t enough so he turned and punched the wall, cracking a few tiles and the skin of his knuckles. Cursing now from the pain in his hand he kicked the waste bin across the small room, watching it bounce off the toilet.  He looked at the tub and recent memories of Hermione’s soft slippery body, and the sounds of her gasps and moans, added to the images of her crying outside as she told her story, and the thoughts of her drunk and losing control. He didn’t know she had gone through hell while they shagged in the shower. He had no idea she was so far gone in her anxiety to do something so desperate when he was inside her, slamming her against the wall soaking wet and gasping for air…

He wasn’t there for her, he wasn’t even aware of any of it. And Ginny knew – she knew and didn’t tell him. He wondered if Harry knew and felt sick thinking about it. Why was he always the last to know anything? He was relieved that she was alright and was getting help, but he still felt lied to once again. Yet even though he felt betrayed he was still fiercely protective of her. She was going back and there was nothing he could do about it...

“Bloody fuck!” he shouted again and gripped the edges on the sink. He looked up in the mirror and saw his freckled face red and wet with tears he didn’t know he had let go. He wiped them away angrily, hating them for making him feel weak. He turned away from his furious reflection and took a shuddering breath. He shouldn’t be in here throwing a tantrum while Hermione was outside waiting for him. He was supposed to be getting fucking scones, not crying and punching walls.

He closed the lid of the toilet and sat down with his head in his hands, forcing himself to calm down. He rubbed his face and used tissues to blow his nose. He took a deep breath and stood up. He put the waste bin back where it belonged and used his wand to repair the tiles. He looked at his bloody knuckles and felt embarrassed for losing it the way he did. Grabbing dittany from the cupboard he healed the cuts, then washed his hands.

“Get your shit together, Ron,” he scolded himself in the mirror. “You know everything now. And she trusts you. She loves you. She needs you. And you need her stop talking to yourself, you tosspot.”

He took another deep breath, pocketed his wand and yanked the door open. He stepped out and came face to face with Harry who was leaning against the wall next to the door.

“So much for waiting,” Harry said. Ron shook his head and went to walk past him, but Harry grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

“Not now, Harry,’ he muttered and shook his arm loose.

“No, wait” Harry said and Ron clenched his fists. He had just managed to calm himself down. He didn’t feel like talking about this right now. He couldn’t. “I saw you outside talking and Hermione crying… it looked intense. I talked to Hermione this morning and-“

“Did you know?” Ron interrupted.

“Know what?”

“Did she tell you?”

“Ron, tell me what? If I knew something to do with Hermione I’d tell you. You know that. Did she tell you what was going on?”

Ron unclenched his fists and turned to lean heavily against the wall. “Fuck, Harry,” he breathed out. “Hermione… she’s lost. I mean, she’s here, but she’s not herself, not really. I dunno what to do anymore.”

Harry stood next to him and asked in a tight and controlled voice, “What happened? Did someone hurt her? Tell me and I’ll-”

“No, nothing like that,’ Ron cut him short and stared at the opposite wall. “It has to do with those bloody panic attacks and being at Hogwarts and just… going through major shit that she shouldn’t have to now that this fucking war is over… I can’t get into it right now. She’s waiting for scones.”

“Okay…” Harry said slowly and shook his head. “Do you want me to talk to her?”

“Not right now.” He looked at Harry who was staring at him closely. He wanted to tell him, ask him what to do, what to say. He could barely string two thoughts together. “Sorry, I don’t want to sound all mysterious. I dunno how much I should even say. She’s taking this medication and there was an incident with firewhiskey and… I don’t fucking know. I still can’t wrap my brain around it.”

“Shit,” Harry breathed out and rubbed the bridge of his nose under his glasses. “I had no idea it was that bad.”

“You and me both. I had a feeling, but this is just so unlike her…”

“Do you think it’ll ever get better?”

Ron sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Fuck if I know, mate. But it has to, yeah? I swear to Merlin, it better not get any worse. I… I love her so much, Harry.” He paused, thinking of the absurdity of him saying that out loud to Harry after years of them as friends, a trio. And now he was with Hermione and Harry was with his sister, and they had to deal with all this bullshit and try to act like adults in the process.

“Even though it was obvious for a long time how you both felt it’s still bizarre to hear you both say shit like that,” Harry said. “It’s brilliant, don’t get me wrong. I just have to get used to you both being so close now.”

Ron looked at Harry, hearing sadness in his voice. “We’re still close, Harry. That won’t change, you know. I won’t let it. We need each other, now more than ever. But I get what you’re saying.” He felt better standing there with Harry, just talking. He meant what he said; He needed both his best friends. He stood up and turned to face Harry. “Listen, if you ever need to talk or anything…”

“I will let you know… Thanks, Ron,” Harry said and clapped Ron on the shoulder, steering him toward the stairs. “Come on, Hermione wants scones.”

XXXXX

Arms loaded with scones, sandwiches, drinks and a large blanket, Ron made his way across the garden to the lake where Hermione lay on her back with her knees bent and hands behind her head. He thought she was sleeping until his shadow fell over her face and she opened her eyes, blinking up at him.

“You could have used a hovering charm, you know. We learned it first year, do you remember?” She smiled smugly up at him. She sounded so much like the Hermione he knew so well that he had the sudden urge to drop everything and grab her and hug her and kiss her. She sat up and said, “Do you need some help?”

He shook his head and unceremoniously dumped the containers on the ground. “Here, help me with the blanket.” Hermione stood and helped him unfold and lay out the hand knitted blanket onto the grass.

It was later on in the day with the sun hidden behind the other side of the house, still bright but casting darker shadows where Ron and Hermione ate in silence. It was way past lunch time and both of them barely ate any breakfast. Ron was happy to see Hermione eating a fair amount of the mountain of food he had brought out.

“Your mum makes the best scones,” Hermione said after taking a bite. He grinned and reached over to wipe crumbs off her chin. They smiled at each other as they chewed. He felt better after talking to Harry. And even though he still felt tightness in his chest knowing what Hermione is going through, along with his own loss and fears, he was alive and with the love of his life who seemed happy for the moment, and had successfully teased him about his shoddy wizarding skills.

“Did you have something planned for today? I hope I didn’t ruin anything,” Hermione said, starting to clean up and set things aside.

“Nah, this is perfect,” Ron said then, when it was cleared, pulled Hermione over to him, stretching out on his side to face her as she lay next to him. “Hermione?”

“Hmm?” she murmured, tracing his nose with her finger.

He caught her hand as she went to touch his lips. “I just want to ask you something.”

“Okay,” she said nervously and dropped her hand from his.

“If Ginny hadn’t found you – if you hadn’t been caught… would you have told anyone? Would you have ever told me?”

Hermione took a long deep breath and looked him in the eyes. “I don’t know if I would have woken up when I did if Ginny hadn’t been there. She must have used a spell to get me out of it. I never asked. I was too embarrassed. But now I’m curious… Either way, I know for a fact that I will never do anything like that again, if that’s what you’re worried about. As far as telling you, I wanted to desperately. It’s why I told my therapist to begin with, to seek advice on how to do it. But she had no choice but to tell McGonagall and then my parents… it sort of snowballed and when she suggested I come here to tell you in person I was so scared you’d be upset with me. I didn’t tell you straight away because I couldn’t, not in a letter. It had to be in person. Do you understand?”

“Yeah, I think I do,” Ron said, and finally meant it. If he had read something like this in a letter he’d have gone mad with worry. She wanted to explain everything in person, and he could see now how difficult that must have been for her to hold in this whole time. He picked up her hand and placed it back on his face, holding it there against his cheek. He smiled underneath it, letting her feel his sincerity as he spoke.

“I love you, Hermione, no matter what. It’ll be okay.” He wanted to say more, but the words stuck in his throat as he stared at her eyes that no longer looked sad, but hopeful.

She smiled back then leaned in and kissed him gently on the lips. “I know. I love you, too.”

She kissed him again and this time he pulled her in, opening his mouth, wanting to taste her. He let out a low moan as he poured every ounce of emotion he had into the kiss. He could feel his jumper twist in her hands between them as she swirled her tongue around his, just as hungry and passionate. He slipped both his hands under her top to feel the smooth cool skin of her back and pressed her to him.

When he could no longer breathe he wrenched himself away from her lips, panting and sweating despite the chilly breeze. Hermione was also out of breath, still clutching his jumper as she ducked her head under his chin.

“So much, Ron,” she whispered. “So much…”

He took his hands out from under her shirt and wrapped his arms around her. He lay down on his back to look up at the sky and wondered how long they had been out there. He found he didn’t really care and kissed the top of her head, his face buried in a cloud of curls.

“I know,” he whispered back and felt her sigh.

Settling back on the blanket with Hermione next to him, they both stared up at the sky as it changed from blue to a hazy purple then dark grey in the evening. It was only when they heard his mum calling for them to come inside to “eat dinner before you starve out there for goodness sake!” that they finally vacated their spot and went back inside to the brightness of the Burrow and his mum’s cooking.

XXXXX

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I have experience with anxiety and depression I have never suffered from PTSD, so I do apologize if I somehow offended anyone. I tried really hard to be accurate and portray how it must feel, but as with any mental illness/issues it affects everyone differently. And since this is from Ron’s point of view (he doesn’t know much about it), you are getting an outsider’s opinion on what is going on with Hermione as well.
> 
> Like I said above, if you think you may be suffering from anxiety, depression, PTSD, or anything to do with mental illness talk to your doctor. There is nothing wrong with seeking help and taking medication if you need it. There are tons of resources online that can help make sense of what you’re feeling. And with social media it is easier now to find like minded people so you don’t feel so alone.
> 
> Next chapter will be Hermione’s point of view a few weeks later, and will hopefully wrap everything up. Thanks for reading and please leave a review.


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, the last chapter! I’ll let you get on with the reading as I’m too emotional right now to write a proper note…  
> Warning: M rated for adult language, strong sexual content   
> Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter.

It was that time of year when winter clouds cover the usual blackness of night with a soft grey blanket, making it appear to be much earlier than it actually was. It also meant snow was on its way, and by morning the castle grounds and turrets will be covered in a thick layer of white. Hermione welcomed the temporary relief from being reminded every day of the horrors that took place here.

It was nearing midnight and Hermione sat looking out her tower window, waiting, not only for snowfall, but for the energy to finish packing her belongings. She was taking the train in the morning to return home for Christmas break. She was looking forward to spending the holidays with her parents, however the circumstances of their last meeting was for a less than joyful reason. Riding in the car with them on her way to a group therapy meeting to talk about abusing alcohol was both infuriating and embarrassing. She didn’t believe she had a problem with alcohol. To Hermione that one time incident was the result of a much bigger problem. Her therapist agreed, but her parents insisted she at least go to a few meetings to ‘make sure’. She could have easily reminded them that she was of age and didn’t have to listen to them, but this level of concern coming from her care free and trusting parents made her comply with their demands.

There was also the fact that Christmas this year would be spent without Ron and Harry as they were still in Auror training. The past three months without Ron has been incredibly difficult, made even worse by the fact that he couldn’t write every day. Waiting days between replies to her daily letters was akin to torture for Hermione. She could tell he hated this as much as she did, but it couldn’t be helped. She just wished she could see him just once before training was over in February…

Since she returned to school Hermione was determined to let her schoolwork, classes, and Head Girl duties keep her distracted, and they certainly did. But it was at night when she was alone that her mind would become free to worry about everything and anything. Why Ron hasn’t written in three days? What was he doing right now? How was Harry? What if there was an attack outside the castle in the next minute? Was she prepared to fight? Could she get to Ginny’s room in time in case something did happen? She thought about the Weasleys and how it would feel to lose another child, and felt an immense amount of pressure, responsibility and fear.

But unlike before, when she’d panic, now she was able to control her breathing. Stay calm. Distract herself and move on. She was still taking anti-depressants and those helped, especially since she stopped using potions. She was also on probation from McGonagall and wasn’t allowed to go on patrols, which Hermione considered a favor and not at all a form of punishment. She was able to keep her single room, however she was only really alone when it was time for sleep, and even then Ginny would sleep over on the weekends. To Ginny’s credit she never treated Hermione as if she were fragile or stupid for what happened. She was just simply there for Hermione and they seemed to become closer friends for it.

Hermione stared out the window as snow began to fall, feeling pensive yet restless at the same time. Needing more of a distraction she vacated her watch and had just walked across the room to grab a book when suddenly a soft tapping noise on the glass made her jump. She turned and saw something large and blurry flying back and forth on the other side, beads of melted snowflakes obscuring her vision.

With her heart leaping out of her chest, she grabbed her wand from her bag and pointed it shakily toward what was obviously a person on a broom watching her. As she got closer there was a streak of red and black, and a large hand was wiping back and forth, turning droplets of snow into streaks on the glass.

A stunning spell was on the tip of her tongue when she stopped and stuttered, “R- Ron?!”

He waved, gesturing for her to hurry. She ran to push the window open, letting in the frigid air, along with the beginnings of the snow storm. And there, to Hermione’s shock, was Ron Weasley -  pink faced, red haired, and swearing as he flew into her room and skidded to a stop just short of crashing into her bed frame.

“Fuck it’s bloody cold! Just beat the storm though, didn’t I?”

Hermione quickly pulled the window closed, shutting the wind and cold out. She stood shaking, blinking through the melting flakes that had landed on her lashes, staring at Ron whipping his head around, shaking snow from his hair and shoulders. She must have looked as panicked as she felt because Ron was grabbing her by the shoulders and peering into her face.

“Hermione, are you okay?”

Her eyes snapped to his and, still trembling with residual fear, her reaction was to push him away and raise her wand at him. He reeled backward, eyes wide open.

“Hermi-”

“When – Where did we first… where was our first time?” Hermione asked, her voice wavering as she struggled to think of a question only they would know while keeping her wand arm steady, praying he would have the right answer so she wouldn’t have to use it.

His expression of shock turned to understanding and then a slight smile as the memory formed. “At your mum and dad’s house, in Australia… on the floor surrounded by books. No! That’s not my answer- it was in their office against a bookshelf! Yeah, that’s it.”

Hermione lowered her wand and it clattered to the floor. Ron was in front of her so fast her words stuck in her throat.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly when he saw her catch a tear before it fell. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” He practically yanked her into him and hugged her tightly. “Shit, I’m so sorry.”

“Ron,” she muttered and her arms were around him in an instant.

“You did the right thing, questioning me like that. Perfect question, by the way,” he chuckled and kissed the top of her head.

“You’re really here,” she said into his cloak, not caring that her face was getting wet. She breathed him in and felt almost dizzy from the onslaught of feelings and memories that the smell of him could bring, all at once. She felt safe and whole for the first time in so long. So when he started to pull away she clung tighter.

He gave up trying to get away and instead kissed her head again, then her temple and then the other. Hermione unclasped the front of his cloak and it dropped to the floor. She threw her arms around his neck and stood on her toes in order to hug him properly. 

“Blimey, I’ve missed this,” he whispered, lifting the back of her flannel top. His chilly hands on her warm skin combined with cool lips along her chin nearly took her breath away. She grabbed his face in both hands and crushed her mouth to his.

When they separated for air Hermione whispered, “I’ve missed you, too.” After saying those words she realized just how true they were. Then she frowned and backed away from him.

“Wait, what _are_ you doing here?” she asked, suddenly alarmed and worried something terrible had happened to warrant this surprise visit. “You’re supposed to be in training. I didn’t expect to see you for another two months! Did something go wrong with your legs?” She backed away even more and scanned his body. He started to talk, but she wasn’t finished. “Were they hurting again? Are you sure you’re fully healed now? Is Harry alright? Ron?”

“Hermione,” Ron interrupted. “Bloody hell, let me explain.” He sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her down next to him. “It was last minute, but I reckon Shacklebot realized they were working us extra hard, given the condensed training and all. So they gave us some time off. Then I had the idea to apparate to outside the gates and sent a Patronus to wake up Hagrid to let me in. Harry even let me use his invisibility cloak.” He pointed to his cloak on the floor, the invisibility one apparently tucked into its pocket. “I couldn’t wait until tomorrow. I had to see you.” He smoothed Hermione’s hair away from her face and smiled. “Sorry I scared you. I saw you sitting at the window. I tried to knock quietly and hoped you’d notice it was me right away.”

“That was… very clever, actually. I was just startled, and still a bit jumpy… So you’re alright? And Harry?” Hermione slid closer to Ron, still unable to believe that her wish from just moments ago had come true.

“Harry’s fine… And right now, I’m more than fine,” Ron replied before pressing his lips to hers. Hermione sighed when he pulled away and looked at her carefully. “How have you been, Hermione?”

He knew everything now; there was no need for embarrassment or hesitation, yet she worried that once again a nice moment between them will be marred by the mere mention of this… _thing_ that she couldn’t control, this malfunction in her brain that didn’t allow her usual calculations and abundance of research to have any effect. It didn’t feel curable, only manageable, and that didn’t sit quite right with Hermione. She didn’t want to be reminded of her inability to sequester this part of her that had taken root and grown like a weed between them, and most times replacing her previously unyielding emotions. 

“Hermione? Are you okay?’ Ron asked again, taking her hand in his and continued to watch her as she worked to regain composure.

“Well, given everything that’s happened I think I’m doing alright. I told you everything in my letters. I didn’t leave anything out, I promise.” For some reason she really needed him to believe that, and felt a bit pathetic to sound so desperate.

She was relieved when he nodded and said, “I know, I just needed to hear it. It killed me not being able to write as much as I wanted. Ironic cause I used to hate writing to anyone. Now I’d write poetry if it meant sending you something, anything.” He chuckled and Hermione relaxed.

“If I had gotten a poem from you I’d worry you had been Imperiused,” Hermione teased.

Ron laughed and poked her lightly in her side, making her jump and giggle. “Oi! You’re funny, yeah? ” he said then poked her other side, grinning when she yelped again. The next thing Hermione knew he was tickling her sides. She screeched and turned away from him until she was on her belly and he was on his feet, bent over and reaching around to tickle her stomach.

“That is not fair!” Hermione gasped and laughed when he found his way into her armpits.

“All’s fair in love and taking the mickey,” he said as he rolled her over onto her back, her legs dangling off the edge of the bed. She had uncrossed her arms to push at his chest, but it was a weak effort since she was laughing too hard to keep him from lifting the bottom of her flannel top, exposing her stomach. He dropped to his knees and raised his eyebrows at her wickedly.

“Oh no, Ron, don’t!” She let out a cry of laughter when he pressed his mouth to her belly and blew hard. “Stop stop! I can’t… breathe.”

She felt Ron snicker against her belly, but instead of getting up she felt his mouth moving along her skin. Her laughter petered down to chuckles as his tongue started licking light feathery circles across her stomach. Her chuckles changed to humming when his hands made their way underneath her top to frame her breasts. His chin nudged her pajamas and her hips involuntarily twitched. He mumbled something before sliding his hands back down along her sides.

“What?”

He lifted his head, grinning. “I said I make the best poetry without words.”

Hermione groaned. “You are far too pleased with yourself for that one.”

“Oh, you love it,” he replied and, still grinning madly, hooked his fingers into her bottoms. He looked up at her for permission and she bit her lip; her hastened heartbeat and flushed cheeks, as well as her raised hips, answered his silent question. Ron sat back on his heels and Hermione shivered as she slowly became naked from the waist down.

She sighed and sank into the mattress, closing her eyes to the ceiling, and for the first time in months let go of her white knuckle grip on her questionable sanity and blurry concentration. It felt wonderful not to care about school, to not be afraid of a triggered memory, to not second guess her emotions and reactions to things she wasn’t sure were warranted.

She was just Hermione in that moment. And Ron, privy to everything she was hiding from and scared of letting the world know, made her laugh and forget. He was also dragging his fingers up her calves and squeezing her knees, then pressing his fingers gently into her thighs.

She opened her eyes to slits when he sat back and pulled his jumper over his head- his hair, dark red in the semi-darkness, stuck up at every angle. When he noticed her looking he smirked and she thought how cocky he must feel right now seeing the obvious affect he had on her as she lay halfway bared and completely open to him.

He approached slowly; hovering over her, his hands dented the mattress on either side of her head, noses almost touching.

“How do you want to do this?” he asked, his eyes roaming, taking in every inch of her face.

“What do you mean?” She knew, but wanted to keep him talking just like this, in this proximity, because the escalating tension was filling her insides with so many butterflies and an influx of electricity that she was quickly becoming addicted to it.

“You know what I mean,” he said and cocked his head to the side, his hair flopping over to cover his brow. She wanted to run her hands through it, but knew if she did he’d just kiss her, so she gripped the sheets under her hands and stared back, unrelenting.

“What do _you_ want?”

“I just want you,” he replied rather bluntly, and shifted slightly, his trouser-clad hips rubbing against the inside of her knees. He was keeping strategically away from her, far enough so she couldn’t feel any other part of him, and the madness was intoxicating. “I want you so bad I don’t care. I’ll do anything.”

As he spoke some of the smugness had worn off and there was sincerity in his eyes. The truth and meaning behind his words, beyond the obvious and current situation, was prevalent in his stare - in his whole body - as he lowered himself to rest on his forearms. Her eyes nearly crossed as his face was even closer now. Her chest was rising and falling with the quickness of her breathing; she could finally feel him on her breasts and between her legs, yet she lay still, waiting.

She whispered in his ear, “Do anything you want, Ron. I’m yours. I trust you.”

“I love you,’ he said almost immediately, as if he couldn’t keep it in any longer- as if she didn’t already know. Her smile nearly broke her face when he said it, thinking how adorable he was and knowing that voicing that opinion would make him feel silly and uncomfortable. So she kept it to herself and smiled wider when he asked her what was so funny.

“Nothing, I’m just happy,” she said as her hand found its way into his hair, still slightly damp from the snow. “I love you, too.”

With that said Ron closed his eyes and swiftly eliminated the remaining space between their lips. His eyelashes made hers flutter, along with the multitude of butterflies migrating from her stomach to where his hands were now fumbling between their legs, unbuttoning and pulling down his trousers.

Hermione used this moment to take her top off, arching her back, mashing her breasts against Ron’s chest to tug the shirt out from under her and throw it over his shoulder. She heard his trousers drop to the floor as she did this, then felt soft cotton over hardness push up and into her. All this happened within seconds and without letting go of their kiss, without taking a breath.

Ron pulled away first, but only long enough to take a take in a lungful of air and go back in for another, and then another. With each kiss he rocked his hips forward, stroking her with his cloth-covered erection, now wet from her own natural lubrication. Still nestled between her legs, Ron used the momentum to propel Hermione up and across the mattress with his body.

“God, Hermione,” Ron muttered. “It’s been too fucking long.”

Hermione hummed in agreement. The past few months had been the most difficult time for her; not only because she missed Ron terribly, but living with the feeling as if she were being attacked by her own mind. Making the conscious decision every morning to wake up and get dressed and face the day was a constant battle - one she fought and won each time, but she had to work through the sadness and around the imminent fears that lurked around ever corner of her mind, and the castle. She was on high alert from her own mind, and it was exhausting.

But now… she felt liberated from her chaotic brain. It wasn’t until now, as her body relaxed and buzzed with pleasure instead of anxiety, that she realized how overwrought she had been lately.

It was with this realization that she began to cry. Ron was flush against her chest, his head tucked into her neck while he continued to caress her body and move his hips, and she cried – a multitude of emotions dripped from her eyes onto his shoulder, making him slow to a stop and lift his head.

“What’sa matter?” he asked and used his thumb to wipe her cheek. “You okay, love?”

She shook her head and tried to smile. “I’m… overwhelmed is all.” Bubbles of emotion burst in her chest as she spoke and more tears fell. She looked away, embarrassed, but Ron brought her back with a hand on her chin.

“Don’t do that,” he said with a hitch in his voice. “Don’t look away. Crying won’t make me love you less, you know.” He kissed the tears on her cheeks, which only made her cry more. “Shhh… It’s okay, Hermione. Come ‘ere…”

He tucked his arms around her and burrowed his face into the crook of her neck, holding her tight while stroking her back. She let it all out: the relief, the anger, frustration, happiness, love, fear… She smiled through the tears when she thought of Ron tickling her and making her laugh, and felt a rush of gratitude for the moment he was giving her right now.

“Thank you,” she whispered and sniffed into his shoulder. “Sorry.” Ron shook his head and mumbled that it was okay. She ran her hands down his back and said, “Keep going.” He nodded then started to kiss her neck. She let out a shaky sigh and wrapped her legs around his waist. “Please, Ron.”

She reached for his pants and started pushing them down as far as she could; with them pressed so close together and the length of his body they were only halfway down before Ron sat up on his knees and took them the rest of the way off. Hermione took in the sight of him kneeling in front of her: his shoulders were wider, and muscles more defined than the last time she saw him. He looked stronger and healthier than she’d ever seen him before. His hair was a bit longer, but with the same freckles and light skin, and those searing blue eyes… he was still Ron.

He placed his hands on her knees and scanned her body until he reached her eyes. “Alright?” he asked.

Hermione nodded, and instead of speaking she grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him down on top of her. She sighed as she finally felt his weight again, and then his bare erection, hot and hard against her inner thigh. Ron wrapped his arms around her again, tucking his head in just like before and held her tight. He arched his pelvis back and then he was sliding into her, slowly at first and then all at once.

Firmly trapped in her embrace, Ron moved his upper body to the side so that he could palm her breast, kiss her neck and thrust into her at the same time. She moaned, letting go enough so he could dip his head under her chin and lick down her chest until her nipple fit into his mouth, then the other. She pulled his head up and they kissed eagerly.  

“I love you so much,” Hermione panted and then groaned when he dropped back down to hold her tight with his head once again in her neck as he moved faster and harder. The held each other close – so close she could feel his heartbeat inside her own chest. Ron sniffed and she held his head against her shoulder, and she felt wetness there.

Then the only movements were between their legs, her thighs locked onto his waist and her feet under his bum as he arched and bowed his back, plunging in and out. They moved together in one fluid motion for what felt like hours. She lost track of time and peripheral vision, focused only on the sensations roaring through her body.

“Hermione… oh god,” Ron grunted. He squeezed her sides and she dug her nails into his shoulders, feeling a strong wave coming as if from a distance, racing toward her as she stood on the shore, her pounding heart in the pit of her stomach and falling quickly. Bracing herself, and feeling Ron so close to completion, she shut her eyes and let it hit her, washing every single thought from her brain.

Ron was pressed in deep and she felt him let go inside of her, heard him cry out, and when she opened her eyes she swore she saw stars.

“Oh fuck,” Ron gasped, and then pushed into her one more time. “Fuck, fuckfuck…” He hissed as he pulled out completely, then turned and flopped onto his back next to her, sucking in deep hard breaths. “Blimey shit fuck…”

“Ron…” Hermione lay on her back in much the same manner as Ron, unable to move with a fast heartbeat and heaving chest.

“Sorry,” he said with a sigh, mistaking her breathy moan of his name for scolding. He placed a lay a lazy hand on her belly and turned his head toward her. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” she said and dragged her fingers along her chest and around his fingers, feeling as if all of her nerves were just underneath the surface of her skin. “That was so… emotional. Have you ever felt that? God, I feel stupid,” she laughed to herself.

Ron turned to his side and looked down at her, grinning. He joined her hands in exploring her sensitive skin and she trembled from his touch. “Yeah, but not like this. This felt different, more intense. I could feel everything you felt, like I was inside your head.” He frowned and drew a circle around her navel then placed his hand flat on her belly. “I don’t know how I’m gonna go back and leave you again.”

 “How long do you have?”

“Two more days. We go back the day after Christmas,” he replied and retreated onto his back once more, shoving a hand underneath his head and staring at the ceiling. She paused to collect her thoughts, forcing the uneasiness behind the blissful feeling that she wanted to savor. She wouldn’t let it win this time. They had two more days with each other. That was more than she had hoped for. Earlier tonight she didn’t think she’d see him for another two months.

She turned and kissed his jaw, then his cheek, making him look at her. “Hey, that’s more than we thought we’d have. Let’s not think about leaving each other. I can’t do it.”

He sighed. “You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s just hard, you know.”

“Trust me, I know,” she said then sat up. “I’m going to use the loo. Do you need anything?”

He grabbed her wrist before she could stand. “You alright? Did I say something wrong?”

She shook her head and laughed. “No, Ron, you didn’t. I just really have to pee, and you kind of made a mess... down there.”

A smirk materialized on his face and Hermione rolled her eyes. “Right, sorry about that.”

“Somehow I don’t believe you,” she laughed as she stood up, feeling his eyes on her as she walked across the room and into the bathroom.

XXXXX

The next morning Hermione woke up lazily, enjoying the weight of Ron’s body pressed against her back, his arm draped over her waist, and a hand between her breasts. She sighed happily, squirming and stretching and rubbing her toes on his shins. She heard a groan from behind.

Ron grumbled, nuzzling his head into her hair until he found the back of her neck and ran his hand over her chest, skimming her nipples and pressed against her belly. “Mmmm… 5 minutes?”

“We can’t,” Hermione said, glancing at the clock, then closed her eyes as he slid his hand between her legs. “Ron… I have to… get ready… train…”

He was stroking her gently while laying tender kisses on her shoulder. “Come back with me then. I have a broom and the cloak.” He slipped one finger, then two into her. She gasped and arched her back, her body betraying her words. “You’re of age. Once we’re outside the gates we can apparate.”

“They’ll know I’m missing,” she breathed out and felt the first signs of an impending orgasm just behind his hand. “I have to… help. I’m… Head Girl… remember?”

Instead of replying Ron held her against him with one hand on her breast while he continued to delve in and out of her, increasing the tempo. She could feel him hard and pressed against her bum.

She pushed back and moaned, “Ron…”

“Shhh…”

She decided to give in and let out a moan as she came suddenly, convulsing his arms. He slowed as she shuddered and then withdrew, making her moan again.

“I have to get up,” she whimpered when she felt him lift her leg and his erection slid between her legs, teasing her. “Ron, I’m sorry. We really have to go.”

He cursed and moved away, and the absence of his touch made her want to take it back and sod everyone else. But the responsible portion of her brain that was still functioning made her leave the bed and walk unsteadily to the bathroom.

“Get up, Ron! I mean it!” she yelled before closing the door.

“I am up! I’ll be _up_ for the next bloody hour!”

She felt guilty for leaving him in such a state, but she couldn’t afford to get in trouble again. She had to get Ron out and herself ready before someone came looking for her. Taking turn in the loo they got dressed in a hurry and she had just managed to finish packing her trunk when there was a knock on the door.

“I told you,” she hissed at Ron, then said loudly, “Who is it?”

“Hermione, McGonagall is asking for you. Are you ready?”

“It’s only Ginny,” Ron said and strode to the door, opening it wide with a big smile. “Hey, sister.” Then he pulled her in and closed the door.

“What the bloody hell are you doing here?” Ginny asked, shocked.

“They let us go for Christmas,” Ron said as he shrugged on his cloak. “Harry’s at home,” he said before she could ask. “But I gotta go, so I’ll see you later?”

He bent down to kiss Hermione and then mussed Ginny’s hair before mounting his broom. She threw the invisibility cloak over him and let him out the window, then closed it and turned to Ginny who was standing there with a giddy smile on her face.

“They’re really home?” Hermione nodded and Ginny’s squeal of excitement made her laugh. “This is brilliant! Harry didn’t even tell me!”

“I had no idea until late last night. He just showed up. I almost hexed him honestly.” She could laugh about it now, but she was genuinely scared in that moment. Shaking the memory away she grabbed her cloak and used her wand to levitate her trunk. “Ready?”

“Oh, hell yes,” Ginny replied and led the way out the door.

XXXXX

Arriving at King’s Cross Station she shouldn’t have been shocked to see Ron waiting for her on the platform. He was surrounded by a group of teenage girls who were taking it in turns trying to get his attention.

Noticing Hermione’s expression Ginny nudged her and said, “He loves the attention, but wait ‘til he sees you and that arrogant grin will wipe right off his smug face.” She snickered then walked ahead towards him. “Oi, ladies, let the man breathe! You wouldn’t be so keen if you’ve ever seen him eat.”

“Shut it, Ginny,” Ron said then waved to the girls who shot Ginny glares as they walked away whispering to each other. Hermione lifted an eyebrow at Ron when he turned back to her with a red face and sloppy grin.

“What? They were just being nice,” he said with a shrug and took Hermione’s trunk from her. She leaned in and gave him a kiss, letting him know she wasn’t upset.

“It’s okay,” she said and took his hand as they followed Ginny to the floos. “I’ve seen the way you eat, and I love you anyway.”

Instead of flooing to the Burrow Hermione and Ron apparated to her house to drop off her trunk. They also decided to spend the rest of the day and night, Christmas Eve, with her parents, since they would be at the Burrow for Christmas the next day.

Her parents were still at work when they arrived so Ron had an idea to get butterbeer for them as a gift because as muggles they ‘have no idea what they’re missing’.  Hermione agreed, but only if they could go to Hogsmeade. She wasn’t ready to venture into Diagon Alley, not yet.

As soon as they apparated and she saw the snow covered shops and the mass of witches and wizards bustling around she felt elated and anxious all at once.

“Shit, I guess we aren’t the only ones doing last minute shopping.” Ron muttered, grabbing Hermione’s hand and squeezing it. “You alright?” he must’ve noticed her stiffen when a throng of children ran past her.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she shook herself, loosening her muscles and reminding herself that it is perfectly normal for her to react this way. “Paula would call this exposure therapy. Being around so many strangers in narrow streets and small shops…” She took a deep breath and silently cursed her condition, willing herself to relax. 

“Look, we don’t have to do this. I can get the butterbeer and meet you back at your house,” Ron said as he pulled her over to stand against the wall of The Three Broomsticks.

‘No,” Hermione replied quickly and took another deep breath. “I’m better now. It was just overwhelming at first. I feel kind of silly now.”

“You’re not silly, Hermione,” Ron said and peered in the window over her shoulder. “It’s not as crowded in there. Looks like most of them are here to shop and walk around. Come on, let’s go in and have a pint.” He smiled encouragingly at her and pulled the door open, leading her inside.

“This is much better,” Hermione said as the warmth of the pub enveloped her and the smell of butterbeer and chips permeated the air. There were customers, but no where near as intimidating as the crowded street outside. She felt her stomach grumble and realized she hadn’t eaten anything all day.

“I’m starving.”

“You’ve read my mind,” Ron said happily and dragged her to the counter. They ordered butterbeers and fish and chips then found an empty table. They took their coats off and sat down, smiling across from each other.

“So, I forgot to ask, how is training so far? You didn’t go into much detail in your letters,” Hermione said as the waitress placed their food and drinks in front of them.

“It’s good,” Ron said around a mouthful of chips then gulped down some butterbeer. “Actually it’s bloody brutal. It’s fun sometimes, especially learning new spells and stuff like that. But they want us to be able to perform physically, so we have to do all sorts of running and exercises. Harry loves that part. He’s a maniac honestly.”

“Have you had any problems with your legs?” She took a sip, hoping to appear nonchalant.

“At first, yeah, but it got better. The healer they have in the program says I’m completely healed.”

“That’s fantastic, Ron,” she said with a sigh of relief. “Really, I’m so glad.”

Ron shrugged and continued to eat. “I just can’t wait for it to be over already so we can finally be official Aurors and catch those fuckers. There are more out there causing trouble and killing… We gotta stop them.”

Hermione took a large bite of food to give her time to respond. She has come to terms with Ron becoming an Auror, but hearing him talk about it while still in training, knowing he’ll soon be putting those skills into practice, out on the field, so to speak…

She nodded. “Mhmm…”

“They even had us doing drills in the freezing rain. I did get Harry really good once, though,” he laughed. “Landed right on his arse, glasses flew off his face. It was brilliant.”

“What about charms? I’ve been studying about advanced glamour charms and transfiguration that are supposed to be very helpful with Auror investigations and undercover work.”

“Oh yeah, we’re learning loads of that stuff,” Ron replied, nodding vigorously. “It’s interesting, but I bet you could teach the instructors a few things.”

Hermione blushed. “I doubt that. I’m sure they have the utmost qualified people teaching you everything you need to learn.”

 _At least_ , she thought, _they better be…_

“My favorite course is Strategy and Profiling. It’s all common sense, but apparently I’m better at it than most the other trainees,” he said, his voice indifferent, but his expression glowing with pride.

“I’m not at all surprised,” Hermione said. “You’re very clever when you want to be. And you always beat everyone at chess. You’re smarter than you think, Ron. You don’t always give yourself enough credit. You also don’t always apply yourself as you are now.”

It was Ron’s turn to blush, but he shrugged it off, finishing his butterbeer.

“Besides, all that physical training is helping in more ways than one…” Hermione said quietly enough for him to hear , then took another sip. She then slowly licked the foam off her top lip while Ron coughed and put his mug down with a thump.

“Yeah?” he said, not sounding quite as intelligent as Hermione just described.

“Oh, yes. You’re so much stronger, confident and… broad.” She felt her face heat up thinking of him kneeling naked in front of her, how the muscles in his arms stood out, the expanse of his shoulders, narrow waist, and the creases along his pelvis.... “You’ve gotten quite fit.” She took a bite of a chip and chewed it slowly.

“Really? You think I’m fit?” His plate empty, Ron reached over and stole a chip off her plate, popping it into his grinning mouth.

“Definitely.” She shifted in her seat and quickly looked around the pub. A few people were glancing their way, but she knew it was most likely due to their faces littering the Daily Prophet more than it was their conversation.

“My god,” Ron said, and then sat back, shaking his head and chuckling. “You’re so in love with me.”

“I’d have to be after watching you eat like that,” she replied smoothly.

Ron pretended to look offended and stole more of her chips, making sure to eat them in the most distasteful way possible while she pretended to be more grossed out than she really was.

She knew what he was doing- what he has been doing since he arrived. He was taking care of her, but in a way only he could. He was making her laugh, engaging her in banter, and keeping things light. He was more comfortable around her, and that made her feel more confident and more herself than she had in so many months. Whether he realized it or not, he was exactly what she needed right now.

Finished with their food, Ron left to order the butterbeers while Hermione put on her coat and waited for him by the door. She watched him lean across the counter, talking for a bit with the barman. He glanced at her and gave her a smile before turning back and taking the closed jugs of butterbeer.

“Apparently you’re not allowed to buy this much of it to go. Talked him into it, though,” Ron whispered when he met up with to her, looking like he won a lottery.

“Of course you did,” Hermione said with a laugh and opened the door for him, stepping outside and apparating back to her house together.

XXXXX

Christmas Eve with Hermione’s parents was more fun than she expected, and she was sure it was due to Ron’s presence. He made everyone laugh and told stories from training. He explained and demonstrated some of the spells he learned, making sure to only perform the least dangerous ones. The butterbeer was a bit hit, especially with her father, who drank an entire jug on his own by the end of the night.

Hermione surprised Ron by playing muggle Christmas songs on the piano. She tried to teach him, but she couldn’t get him to concentrate long enough; he insisted that she play while he sat with her on the bench and watched her the entire time.

Her mum put A Christmas Carol on the television later in the night, which Ron seemed to enjoy until he fell asleep on her shoulder, and her father started snoring in his chair. Hermione and her mother smiled at each other over their sleeping heads, and she felt at peace. Not just temporarily, but the kind of peace that she knew would last, at least within her home and between her and her parents.

She shook Ron awake and they said good night before heading upstairs to her bedroom. Ron didn’t bring anything with him so he stripped down to his pants and crawled into her bed while she undressed. She decided not to bother with pajamas and climbed in after him.

It was dark and quiet in the house except for random noises from the radiator and rustling branches outside her window. She turned to Ron and was instantly enveloped into his new, yet familiar, body and smell and warmth. He dipped his head and they kissed softly and slowly for a while, steadily getting closer while caressing each other’s bodies. Eventually, they managed to remove everything, leaving them exposed to one another’s hands and lips as they touched and kissed underneath the covers.

When they made love it was slow and deliberate. No words were said, only pants of breath and low moans between them as they brought each other to climax.

XXXXX

Christmas Day at the Burrow was a stark contrast to Christmas Eve with Hermione’s parents. Where it was peaceful and lovely at Hermione’s house, Ron’s house was somber yet chaotic.

After having breakfast with her parents and exchanging gifts with them Ron and Hermione arrived at the Burrow just before noon. As soon as they arrived through the back door Hermione knew that this year wouldn’t be the same as previous Christmases with the Weasleys. She had figured as much, given Fred’s death, as well as Lupin and Tonks’, and everyone else they knew and lost in the war. She knew not to expect the usual running around and carrying on, especially since it was usually the twins causing the trouble and making everyone laugh.

Mrs. Weasley was alone sat at the kitchen table writing furiously on a piece of parchment and jumped when Ron closed the door behind him.

“Sorry, mum,” he said and shared a glance with Hermione. He looked worried and she knew why. His mum looked stressed about something, and the fact no one else was around was unsettling.

Ron put a hand on his mum’s shoulder and sat next to her, reading as she wrote. “Mum, why are you writing a letter to George? And where is everyone? Harry and Ginny?”

Hermione sat on the other side of Mrs. Weasley as she put down her quill and turned to Ron. “George has decided not to come,” she said matter-of-factly. “And since he refuses to see me, or anyone else, I am forced to send an owl to my own son.” Hermione frowned as she read some of the letter and shook her head at Ron over his mum’s shoulder.

“Er, mum, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said and slowly extracted the parchment from her hands. “Why don’t you let me try to talk to him? He doesn’t know I’m back, right? Maybe he’ll see me, and I can try to get him to come around.”

“Oh, Ron, would you do that?” Molly sniffled and blew her nose on a napkin. “I’ve tried everything. It’s bad enough without F-Fred… Bill and Fleur will be here soon. Your father is out picking up Teddy. Harry and Ginny are cleaning the rooms upstairs. And I’m supposed to be cooking and doing everything else, but instead I’m sat here writing this letter, and you two walk in and see me like this.”

Ron stood up from the table, looking determined. “Right, I’m gonna go talk to George right now. Don’t worry, mum, even if he agrees to staying for five minutes I’ll bring him back.”

Mrs. Weasley held his hand for a moment and Hermione smiled at him before he left, slamming the door behind him. It broke Hermione’s heart to see this family so broken up, especially Mrs. Weasley. She wrapped her arms around the older woman and let her cry on her shoulder. She felt terrible for what she was going through; having to orchestrate a Christmas without one of her children, and Teddy being there will be a reminder of Lupin and Tonks as well. There had to be something she could do to help.

“Why don’t you go upstairs for a lie down and we’ll take care of everything down here?” Hermione suggested as she sat back and handed her a clean napkin. “We all know how difficult this is. You shouldn’t have to worry about it, not this year.”

Mrs. Weasley looked at Hermione and smiled then patted her hand. “You’re a sweetheart, Hermione. And very thoughtful. But I don’t know if I could rest right now even if I wanted to.” She sighed and wiped her face. “Making Christmas dinner is what I do, and if I don’t do that this year… too much has changed already, you see?”

“I understand,” Hermione said and wiped her own tears. “How about I help you then? You can teach me some of your recipes. I’m a rubbish cook, but I want to learn. For Ron and... myself.” She blushed when she almost said ‘our future children’. But Mrs. Weasley caught on and smiled knowingly.

“I’d like that very much,” she said. “Now go on up and say hello to Harry and Ginny. I’ll call you when it’s time to start.”

Hermione stood and leaned over to hug her one more time before leaving the kitchen and going upstairs. She heard voices and found Harry and Ginny in Fred and George’s old room cleaning and talking. She sighed with relief that they weren’t being… quiet somewhere more private.

“Hermione!” Harry engulfed her in a fierce hug when he saw her in the doorway. She was taken aback by his sudden affection, but returned the hug with a smile.

“Hello, Harry,” she said, patting him on the back and exchanging amused looks with Ginny.

“Don’t mind him,” Ginny said as she opened the curtains, letting light spill into the dingy room. “Harry’s feeling a bit touched today. We all are, I guess.” She looked around the room and sighed. It was Harry’s turn to give Hermione a look and an uncomfortable sadness hovered around them.

“Ginny, why don’t I help Harry in here while you go down and lend your mum a hand? She said Bill and Fleur are coming soon. I just left her in the kitchen and she looked like she could use it.”

She looked from Harry to Hermione and nodded. “Yeah, sure. Thanks.” She smiled thinly and left the room in a hurry.

“Is she alright?” Hermione asked Harry quietly.

He shrugged and said, “Who is? Especially today…”

“So what are you doing in here anyway?” She glanced at Fred’s empty bed and a shiver went through her spine. “I didn’t think anyone would stay in here.”

“Ginny wanted to clean it up for George. She got it in her head that he was actually going to come.” He sat on the edge of George’s bed and sighed. “I told her even if he does come that doesn’t mean he’d want to sleep here, not in this room anyway. I know I wouldn’t. Just sitting here feels… painful. I can’t imagine…”

“I know,” Hermione said and sat next to him, taking in the empty shelves and half filled boxes that the twins had left behind when they moved out. There was a layer of dust on everything, evidence that time has a way of reminding you that it moves on, even if you don’t.

“This must be so hard for them.”

“Where’s Ron?”

“He went to talk to George. I hope he succeeds, but… is it wrong to feel nervous if he does? There’s just so much sadness. I don’t know if I can handle seeing George like that.” She put her face in her hands and groaned. “I can’t believe I said that. I feel so awful.”

Harry put a hand on her back. “I was actually thinking the same thing.” She sat up to look at him and he pushed his glasses up on his face and dropped his hands to his lap. “I don’t know what is best for anyone, but I know we all need to stick together. Even if it feels awful and sad. It’s the only way to get through it, isn’t it?”

“That sounds like something my therapist would say,” she muttered and paused when Harry cleared his throat.

“How is that going? Therapy?”

He looked expectantly at her and she replied, “How much did Ron tell you?”

He shrugged, suddenly looking unsure of what to say. “Not much… I’d rather you tell me what you want, if you want to. No pressure.”

She couldn’t do this sitting down so she stood up and started levitating boxes into the closet.

“Are you familiar with PTSD?”

“Yeah, of course. Went through a bit of it myself after Cedric died. But I was already going through so much shit, and then Sirius… it sucks.” He got up to help her, lifting the boxes without a wand.

“Apparently I have it and yes, it certainly sucks.”

‘I know,” he said, dropping the last box inside the closet and closing the door. The room looked even emptier now. “But it’s nothing to be ashamed of. There’s no right way to do… _this_.” He opened his arms and plopped them down at his sides.

She regarded him carefully, noticing that, just like with Ron, there was a contrast to the last time she saw him.

“How do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“No offense, but you weren’t always so open with your feelings. You seem to be coping alright. I mean, considering…”

“I dunno. I’m definitely not okay, but… I just take it one day at a time. It took me a long time to figure out that’s all anyone can do.”

“I suppose. I think I dwell too much on the past and worry too much about the future. It seems to take over and I can’t function. It feels awful to need extra help just to get through a day.”

“Like I said, nothing to be ashamed of. As long as you’re feeling good and happy then I support you,” Harry said and patted her back before turning to make the beds.

She smiled at his back, thinking how grateful she was for his friendship. She had written to Harry almost as much as she did to Ron while they were away, but never went into detail about what she was going through. She figured Ron had told him something, and judging by his reaction she was glad he did.

There was a thoughtful silence as she moved around the room, clearing cobwebs an dust.

“Ron said you’re enjoying Auror training,” she said as she moved on to sweep the floor.

Harry stood by the window, leaning against the sill. “I love it. After not really having a choice in fighting the bad guys it feels good to know I still want to, without some prophecy hanging over my head. I still have a purpose, but this time I’ll be more prepared and properly trained, you know?”

“Do you think things will change? Within the Ministry, I mean? Even before Voldemort came back there were so many injustices going on. I’d like to think that after everything that’s happened there will be some changes.”

She finished sweeping and turned to Harry who was nodding enthusiastically.

“Yeah, I do,” he said and started pacing. “It’s one of the main reasons I wanted to become an Auror, Hermione. I know firsthand how quickly people can change and turn evil, whether it’s against their will or not. Something’s gotta change and honestly,” he paused and walked to Hermione, placing a hand on her shoulder. She stared at him with a new respect and awe as his expression was full of conviction and passion. “Honestly, I think between the three of us – you, me and Ron – we can do it.”

“What are you saying, Harry?” His excitement was contagious. Her heart started beating faster, but not from panic; She felt the truth of his words start a spark within her, but she needed to hear more…

“I’m saying that we use this situation: beating Voldemort, everything we went through, the attention it got us. And when you’re done with school you’ll work for the Ministry and turn that place around, Hermione, I know it.” He stopped and took a deep breath. “We’re gonna flip this wizarding world on its head and make everything better- for us, for the Weasleys, everyone. It starts now with Ron and I becoming Aurors, and you getting your NEWTS. This is only the beginning.”

His speech ignited the spark and erupted in a full on blaze of hope and purpose she hadn’t felt in a long time. Their job didn’t end when Voldemort died. They still had so much to do, and at the mention of the Weasleys she knew he was right. She was so scared of Ron and Harry becoming Aurors because it meant more danger for them, but there will always be something posing a threat to them. They had to take a stand, and she had to do exactly what Harry said: Start being herself again, the fighter in her that was always there needed to wake up and do her part. She knew without a doubt they couldn’t do this without her.

“I’m with you, Harry,” she said before throwing her arms around him and hugging him tight. “Thank you,” she whispered, and thought to herself, _for so much more than you will ever understand_.

“I leave for ten minutes…”

Hermione turned around to see Ron shaking his head and leaning against the door frame. She felt a rush of emotion as she ran to him and hugged him just as tightly. He grunted and hugged her back.

“What’s going on? Why are you in here?” He asked when Hermione let him go and he looked around the room. “Did you clean?”

“Ginny wanted to have it ready for George,” Harry said. “We did it mostly for her since I don’t think he’ll stay.”

“He’s downstairs,” Ron said slowly. “But you’re right, I don’t know if he’ll stay the night. I’m sure Ginny appreciates it, though.” He fidgeted in the doorway and again there was a sad silence. Hermione glanced back at Harry who looked worried that they might have done something wrong messing with the room.

“What did you say to get him to come?” Harry asked.

“Just that he was being a git and to get his arse over here before Mum cried herself into a puddle.”

Hermione shook her head and rubbed her temple. “Oh, my god, Ron, you didn’t.”

“Of course not,” he said and backed away into the hall. “I’m not that stupid. Obviously it worked and I didn’t muck it up, so don’t worry.”

“I didn’t think- you’re not stupid, Ron. I didn’t say-“

“Nevermind, I didn’t mean it like that,” he said softly and shook his head. “Sorry, I’m just worked up is all. I knew it would be hard being here, but…”

“It’s alright, mate,” Harry said and slapped Ron on his shoulder. “We’re not going anywhere, no matter how mad you get. Don’t worry about offending us. Right, Hermione?” He gave her a look and she nodded.

“Right, of course,” she said and squeezed Ron’s hand. “I wasn’t offended. I just didn’t want you to think I meant anything by what I said. I didn’t believe you would say that to him, that’s why I said it.” She heard herself rambling and shut her mouth. Ron leaned over and gave her a kiss.

“I know,” he said and looked over his shoulder at Harry.

“That’s my cue,” Harry said and out both hands up in a mock surrender. “See you two in a minute.” He smiled at them for a moment before turning away and going downstairs.

“Is everything okay?” Ron asked, circling his arms around her waist. “That looked like a serious hug.”

“Harry and I were just talking about how we could practically change the world, and I believe him, Ron. I really do.” She felt the energy from before return and she smiled up at him, hoping to see the same conviction she saw in Harry’s eyes.

Ron smirked and said. “Yeah, he’s been talking like that for the last month or so. At first I thought training had gotten to his head, but he has a point. I reckon I believe it, too. He actually made me think I can do something worthwhile.”

“You can, Ron!” She grabbed his arms and shook them. “Honestly, this world would be - for lack of a better term - quite _shit_ without you.”

He let out a snort at her choice of words and tightened his grip on her, pulling her in close and kissing her on the lips.

“Well, I can’t argue with that, can I?”

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh that feeling of completion is upon me! Not the pervy, toe-curling kind, but the kind you get from finishing a story that started four long years ago.   
> Thank you to everyone who read this entire thing and left reviews, followed and/or favorited! I get each and every notification and I try to reply to all the signed in reviews. It means so much to me that you stayed on this journey with me. I really hope you liked the story.


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